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The Twin Prince 8: The Prince in Chains
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Key



Joined: 08 Feb 2004
Posts: 2614
Location: The Royal Palace

Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 12:28 am    Post subject: The Twin Prince 8: The Prince in Chains  

The next chapter of the featured storygame "The Twin Prince" has been posted:

Chapter 8: The Prince in Chains

Discussion and voting are complete for Chapter 8.

For more about the storygame, see the New Players Start Here topic in this forum.
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JezSharp



Joined: 18 Jul 2006
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Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 12:46 am    Post subject:  

Right....well everything he says seems to make things worse at the minute so first option is no message at all :) . Then for the remaining number of days (not sure how many a year constitutes) he could practice trying to use the spark.

Secondly is one of love/gratitude even if he doesn't feel that way towards his father (and to some extent why should he?)...risky because his father will spot this if he's released.

He could claim that he has a way to defeat Mars but must leave for the town at once, then prepare a tale involving the spark if his father needs further convincing.

He could simply say 'I'm sorry for hurting you father though I never meant you any harm.'

Or he could say, 'Father why have you deserted me?'etc

Just athought but how is the twin supposed to pass on his message when the twin shouldn't be there in the first place?.

Perhaps a message ouside of the citadel...but then who does he know...perhaps a message to the captain of the gaurds if he's not fully behind the King...or the serpent in the tower perhaps ask him a question...

Really not sure as any mesage has the potential for as much harm as good, I'd stick with nothing or a simple 'sorry father', for now.
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D-Lotus



Joined: 21 Oct 2004
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Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:33 pm    Post subject:  

Quote: strike

Should be strikes.
I noticed a perceptably better chapter than last, language and style-wise.
____

Sorry, father? Sorry, I wasn't sure I wanted to fight a ten-headed monster, and its all my fault because you stuck me inside a citadel during my whole life?

I understand that right now, Julius is feeling horrible, desperate. But does he think sweet words will turn his father? A man who treats a son in such vile ways deserves no sweet words, and they would create no effect on him. I am starting to doubt wether Zuspaster is really Julius' father, as he seems completely ruthless and uncomprehending. His actions have been exaggerated and brutal.

Therefore, a man who has committed the crime that Zuspaster committed, has no scruples or pity. He has gone too far to restore any truthful relationship with Julius.

Yet, they inform Julius that he is doubting of the correctness of his actions. And why is this? I do not think he fondly remembers Julius playing in the snow with him. I think his regrets stem from Julius' last words: "I am the only one who can help you". Zuspaster is finally admitting it, he's in trouble. So it is now he begins to worry about his son. Now it is when the seeds are planted.

This is exactly what Julius expected, his words worked to the perfection. He knew, we knew, that Zuspaster would not let him go on the spot. He knew, we knew that his words would probably bring him much pain and suffering in jail, but that eventually they would bear fruit on Pater- Zeus' conscience. In Greek mythology, Zeus' father tried to murder him at birth, but Zeus instead killed his father to establish his supremacy. Now, Julius must use his father's weakness to eventually overcome him. Zeus is beginning to break down in defeat. Are some honey-covered words going to tender his heart into letting us free after all he has done?

My answer is, give him the same message. Reveal to him your strength and his own weakness. This time, however, slightly alter the message so that it seems you will consent to help. Have Rene water the seeds that were planted thirty-nine days ago.

"Tell him what I told him once before. Only I can help, and I am willing to help."
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dinranwen
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Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:55 pm    Post subject:  

I have to agree with D-lotus here. Water the seeds that have been planted and the may bear fruit, but in time. However, How much time will it take? How long it will take seeds to grow into a tree, how long before that tree matures enough to bear fruit, how long before the fruit ripens enough to pick? How long? In this case, it might be too long.

A monster is ramaging around your country, and you want to send a message that may just end up taking as long if not longer to bear fruit than your first one.

I'm not say it's not a good suggestion it is, but what I said is certainly food for thought?

My suggestion, it's time for action, not for words. How long have you allowed yourself to be kept in a castle? How long were you willing to be kept in the dark? How long did it take before you began to wonder what else there was? Too long. Will you take that long to act when people's lives are at stake?

You saw what Mar's could do. You saw the terrors it left in it's path. Can you honestly wait while you know that is accuring?

You have seen the mercy your father gives to his own son. What mercy then has he given to the people?

Rene just told you about a great gift, a gift you can use. A gift you should use. The gift of Imagination. Imagination: inescaple, unbound, unfetter, powerful, majestic, endless. That's what you have, so use it.

Why not send a message that will light a spark? Like the saying goes, it only takes a spark to get a fire going. Light the spark, and set not a fire but a blaze.

For the past days in the jail, you've imagined that the Jailor is your friend. Make that real, speak to him. He will be your spark while your imprison.

Send a message not your father, but to your people. Tell them that you know what terrors they face, and you will no longer leave them helpless, but you need there help first. Imagine that your people, secretly and quietly, will set you free.

Imagine that a small army will move at your side, and send Rene with the message to start that movement. Rene will be your spark to the citadel.

Imagine that Mars, bloody war that he represents, can be used not for evil but for good. Imagine a war that ended not in bounds, not in chaos, but life. Imagine Freedom, for yourself and the world.

Dream, young prince, dare to dream, then once dream, set your twin sparks, one: form a friendship with the jailor, two: set your people ablaze and willing to help you. You dream will become real, and your sparks will become your blaze. A blaze that will end in the one thing you wish for: Freedom.
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D-Lotus
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Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 7:25 pm    Post subject:  

Quote: Why not send a message that will light a spark?

Julius has no clue how to do this, or if it even works.

Quote: to your people

Who are his people? He neither knows them nor they know him. They probably associate more with Zus, who was trying to help recover from Mars' destruction, than with you who they've never seen.

Quote: it's time for action, not for words.

Action, what action can we really take now? We can't dig on the ceilling with out teeth. All we can do is play around with this idea of the spark.

Using the spark is all very fine, and I'm sure he can practice that later, or with the jailer, or whatever. But what is he going to say right now? You didn't answer: what message should Rene bear?
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JezSharp
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Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:23 pm    Post subject:  

I have to f5 D-Lotus, but both your posts were excellent. Actually why not do both to some extent, send that message and in the meantime try practicing (but not escaping as he'd have to get through an awful lot of guards) using the spark.

You're right about the sorry message, it would look weak and his only hold over his tyrant father is that he has the key to victory - his father was probably bluffing when he told him that he 'shouldn't be so sure' about being the only hope he had.
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Key
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Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 4:00 pm    Post subject:  

Great discussion, everyone! Keep it coming...
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D-Lotus
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Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 5:10 pm    Post subject:  

I agree on practicing the spark on your own, but I think our message should be clear and sharp.
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D-Lotus
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Posted: Fri Sep 29, 2006 3:49 pm    Post subject:  

Not much discussion. I think the extra week is taking a turn for the worst, key.
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Key
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Posted: Fri Sep 29, 2006 4:58 pm    Post subject:  

Yeah, I know :(

Well, at least I've got enough to work with for this poll. Vote away, everybody...

:-)
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Key
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Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 1:10 am    Post subject:  

I'll leave the poll open for a few more days. New chapter this Saturday...
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Smee
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Joined: 16 Oct 2004
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Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 1:39 am    Post subject:  

A tricky vote to make. I'm not sure I like any of the options, but reading through the analysis that gave birth to the options I can't really fault it or come up with an alternative I like any more.

Given the information about our 'Maker' powers I'm torn by the illogical nature of them, and my love of any kind of magic ability. So I would be keen to try something along the lines of Dinny's thoughts. We've been told how it works, regardless of our doubts clearly there is some nugget of truth behind it and we're not going to find that truth by holding the skeptical view of our powers. Practice, try, and attempt anything that comes to mind. A simple trick to try first will be to 'know' that our gaoler will talk back to us. So far he's been silent despite out courtesies. As soon as we get him to talk we have some feedback that perhaps our Maker powers do work and we can build from there.

Happy Writing :D
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Chinaren
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Joined: 05 Sep 2005
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Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 3:20 am    Post subject:  

Went for the second one, and apparently winning. :)
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Mother Goose
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Joined: 09 May 2004
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Posted: Sat Oct 07, 2006 7:26 am    Post subject:  

If my name doesn't appear in the voting list, it doesn't mean I'm not following the story. By the time I got around to voting, it seemed pointless, so I didn't bother.
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D-Lotus
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Joined: 21 Oct 2004
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Posted: Sun Oct 08, 2006 10:10 am    Post subject:  

Is there any date set for the next chapter?
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Key
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Posted: Sun Oct 08, 2006 9:43 pm    Post subject:  

It's almost done. Hope to have it out tomorrow.
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Key
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Posted: Mon Oct 09, 2006 9:08 pm    Post subject:  

Locking this topic, as chapter 9 is posted.
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