City of IF

[Phang]

You don’t like RPs? Yeah, I thought you liked them really. I thought you’d post on this. Nothing to do with this weapon I’m pointing at you.

Besides, doing so may get you immortalised (until it’s deleted) in a linear!


It was a nice day when they arrived – just to sod up any attempt at pathetic fallacy. Shady dudes in sharp business suits (but incredibly tacky ties) were wandering round Unnamed in packs, and soon some of the city’s naughtier* residents were disappearing. Needless to say, this pissed off some people.


The Ti’Clan! were confused. These dudes (dubbed the Tacky Tie Posse) were better at dealing with naughty beasties, yet possessed an air of naughtiness themselves…The Foulites felt similar – some of their minor gods were victims.

Ralph’s reason for being pissed off was more personal. His favourite Graem Crystal** had been their most recent victim.


This was also worrying Phang, as a friend of several missing naughty beasties and officially one herself. Arming herself with a bottle of lemonade (2 litre) and some fresh underwear she set out from the haunted house…


*In the Unnamed sense. Which is far more than naughty.
**Emptied Dreams, anyone? Its in Linear Lane.



So there you have it. Something’s going down in Unnamed and you’re part of it. In case you haven’t noticed yet, this RP is taking place in the same ‘universe’ as the Demonic Life and will likely feature a lot of references to my stuff, silly stuff, and parodies of real life stuff. For you, though, you need only know the following:


You are a resident of Unnamed (which means you could be anything, really) out to help defeat the sinister TTP for whatever reason. I will be requiring the following information:

Name: Self-explanatory. May be sodded with due to affiliation.
Species: Like I said, this could be anything. Oh dear.
Affiliation: Clan, group, or rock band, for which you fight this war. Select from list, or make your own (give details):
~Ti’Clan!: Warriors tasked with protecting normal humans from naughty beasties. Average number of hands is four – the extra pair having elemental powers. Add Ti’ and ! to name, eg. Ti’Hon!
~Graems: Ralph’s minions. A zombie is you! Unless he likes you (or you ‘like’ him) enough for him to give you a name and some hidden abilities.
~Foulites: From Goths to proper daemonologists, worshipping everything from psychic space crabs to soul-eating hentai pornstars. ‘Darken’ name and powers to taste (or lack thereof).
~Hivists: You like bugs too much. Kill and eat people, obey orders from superiors, and fight for the dystopia of tomorrow!
~Mercenary: Also known as the ‘I’m so badass I don’t work for no one’ option (yay!)
Appearance: Picture or text, I have no preference.
Awesome Powers: Tell us how you intend to kick our bum-bums.
Not-so-awesome: Tell us how we may mock you and kick your bum-bum in return.
Biography: There are only two types of backstory: edgy, badass ones with extra grit; or ones with lots of kitten and bunny hugging.

If you don’t get that, here’s mine, which might help you:

Name: Phang (Phangarian Almar)
Species: Demon
Affiliation: Mercenary
Appearance: Purple with red markings, furred legs and paws, blonde, red eyes, twin sets of fangs, small horns.
Awesome Powers: Extendable claws that can slash concrete. One set of fangs drains blood, the other injects poison similar to that found in Angel’s Trumpet. Grows wings and pincers under specific conditions.
Not-so-awesome: Can’t balance if tail can’t move freely, and is very sensitive to its pain. Easily stalled by someone saying they know something secret about her – of which there are a lot of secrets to choose from – but this is definitely risky business.
Biography: We all know Phang – its me, yeah? Either way, she’s out to side with whoever as long as it speeds up the war’s end so she can get back home.

I’ll be giving you a week or so to reply, or until I get plenty of people. The former is more likely.

[Meranos]

Is this right? I'll go ahead and try this out(I am sooooooo messed up):

Name: Ti'Kyn!
Species: Modified Human
Affiliation: Ti'Clan!

Appearance:

Awesome Powers: His hands lash out like whips! (at least the whip-like ones do) The watery one can shoot out water, & the fiery one can shoot out flames, too! His whip-like hands also can manipulate gold! He can shoot flames & water from both of his not-so-whip-like hands! He is faster, stronger, and more skilled than a regular human! He can phase into shadows! (if he's in shadows)

Not-so-awesome: He doesn't like getting wet, and he doesn't like getting burned, & if you:
1. Burn his watery hand
2. Put water on his fiery hand
His damaged hand will drop as dead weight (like lugging around 2 anvils tied to some string) for the next 24 hours or until someone either:
1. Douses the dead watery hand in water for 5 minutes
2. Burns the dead fiery hand for 5 minutes
In which case the treated hand will be revived (and lighten up). He's also a human, so he is as receptive of damage as any human. (He's just faster & stronger)

Biography: His parents were military biologists that studied humans for the sake of war, until he (at the age of 10) broke into their lab as they were running a contained experiment which blew up the entire facility and killed everyone in the facility except for him. He noticed, as he grew up in the orphanage that he was shipped off to, the growths in his sides. He learned how to manipulate them and all the other special abilities his survival had given him, until he decided (when he was kicked out of the orphanage for being too old) to join the Ti'Clan! :smile:

[Phang]

Waaayyy! I have to say I like him already.

[tramp in a storm]

hhhhmmm....ponders* Ti'Jim, Ti'Gay or Giraffe Girl...? ooooh! it's a toffee!
I'll go for Giraffe Girl soon as I know more about her.... shockadelic, that!

Name: Giraffe Girl
Species: Demon
Affiliation: Mercenary
Appearance: Tall girl with long brown hair. Normal eh? ahem, no. Long neck, giraffe ears and giraffe coloured skin.
Awesome Powers: How i kick bum-bums? by literally kicking them. Ever been kicked by a giraffe?...no, nor me. Also, if kept hostage, she can talk so much that the people go mad and let her loose and/or begging for someone to take her back. Is also clever.
Not-so-awesome:Can have really dum moments. When I say dumb I mean super-dumn. If you tie her down and celotape her mouth or isolate her, there is no way she can get you. She can be easilly distracted with blue and/or shiny stuffs and by TV programmes with 'absorbing powers and by a good book.
Biography: A giraffe from the apparently desert lands of Greece and mud huts. Moved to Unnamed and turned into a girrafe as soon as Phang decided it was so. Phang and her friends made sure that Giraffe girl's mind was well and truly mushed and here she is today - Following Phang and helping her win this war.... but will serve anybody who has the same intetions and chocolate.

[Adalia]

Name: Kyana (key-ON-uh) Victor

Species: Reaper of Souls (Simply put she's like the Grim Reaper/Angel of Death/ Death Incarnate) :lol:

Affiliation: Foulite

Appearance:

Awesome Powers: She will kick your bum-bums by consuming you in darkness (courtesy of Kay'al*) as she swings her lovely scythe in an attempt to 'harvest' your soul. (Keep in mind that she's a ghost, so it would be rather difficult to harm her.)

Not-so-awesome: Any light source, especially the sun, will guarantee a great deal of pain to be dealt to her. Also, you could splash holy water on her (though not as effective as the light).

Biography: At age eight, on Halloween, she was kidnapped and violated by a man full of vileness and hatred. He put her in a dark, damp basement, and after a year had passed, he found that he could no longer stand to live. He shot her in the head and placed her body into a coffin that was already occupied. In the light of the full moon, he shot and killed himself. Her body was never found.

Her soul was ferried to Hell. Kay'al**, knowing her tragic tale, made a deal with her. She could return to the surface as a phantom, but she had to serve Hell by ferrying souls. She agreed.

*see Biography
**a top demon

[Guest]

Name: Ti'Ame!

Species: Human with feline qualities

Affiliation: Ti'Clan!

Appearance: She is tall with long black hair tied up in pigtails. Right in front of the pigtails there are two solid black cat ears. Her eyes are a brilliant orange color but one eye is hidden behind Ti'Ame!’s long bangs. On each cheek are three cat whiskers. Her body is slim and right at the base of her lower back, right above her butt is a black cat’s tail with a white tip. If you look closely, you will see some black stripes on her tanned skin.

Awesome Powers: Ti'Ame! doesn’t have retractable claws, but she does keep her nails pretty sharp, so she uses her nails in battle. She also has great skill with a sword, but she rarely uses that unless her life is in danger. Her martial arts skills are that of a professional.

Not-So-Awesome: Ti'Ame! has many weaknesses, but these are the top 4:
1-gets distracted easily
2- She sees a mouse or anything that looks like a mouse, she will chase it
3- Afraid of dogs
4- Give her catnip, and she will easily succumb to anyone’s willpower

Biography: She really doesn’t know where she came from. She was abandoned in an alley at the age of 3. Ever since then, she learned to fight and live on her own. Soon after she honed her skills with a sword, she joined the Ti'Clan!

[The White Blacksmith]

Name: Re'Kran

Species: Wolven- a wolf-like human (runs on all fours, but can use her two front hands normally and can use her back feet as hands (w/o opposible thumbs) when she needs)

Affiliation: Re'Clan. The enemies of the Ti'Clan, these are innoecnts who have been wronged by the Ti'Clan in their past and have banded together to get revenge. They live in the deserts, but occasionally venture into the cities to kill Ti'Claners.

Appearance: She is short and muscular, with grey, long hair growing all over her body. Her nails are tough and sharp, and her teeth are those of a carnivore. Her face is peculiarly lengthened, and her ears are on top of her hear rather than beneath it. She has two different coloured eyes- one blue, one green- which seem constantly alert. She has a lighter tail than the rest of her body, though it is shorter than a normal tail. She does wear clothes, and has opposible thumbs on hre front hands.

Awesomeness: She can bite and scratch as any wolf can. She can run for hours on end at a fast pace, and can live for days without food. She has highly developed senses of smell and hearing, and keeps warm always thanks to her thick hair. Magic does not affect her as much as normal humans, and she can speak with other canines.

Notness: When on two feet she is much smaller than humans, and cannot move fast at all. She can hold things, but not very well and tends to drop anything she holds. She is rubbish with weapons, and has no skill with magic. When speaking to humans, she struggles with the words, and knows from experience learning does not come easily to her.

Biography: Lived in the district of Unnamed where all her people lived until she was three. However, many of the Wolvens were involved in criminal acts and the Ti'Clan attacked and burnt them out. This orphaned the young Kran, and she fought her way out of the city- through safeholds of the Foulites, who sympathised with her, though she didn't want it- and wandered in the wilds, until she was picked up by a Re patrol. They trained her, and taught her most of the stuff she knows. They shaped her views- she is not evil, and will fight against things she sees as wrong, but will do anything to kill the Ti'Clan.

[Phang]

'Raaaayyyy! I say now, er gost!


Phang (hey, that's me!): Giraffe Girl calls round to join in with you in ending what has been dubbed 'the Unnamed War'. As you leave the haunted house in Subliminalburbs, you see a group of shady-looking (despite being in full light) persons hanging around outside. Liek, oh noes! What you do?...

Ti'Kyn!: As a trusted member of the Ti'Clan!, you have recieved orders from Ti'Hon's secondaries to search Unnamed for the naughtiest beastie you can find and use it as bait. As you approach the Headslam'd! Mental Institute you are suddenly jumped by a bunch of escaping nutters*!

*Though its not politically correct to use such Insaneist language.

Giraffe Girl: Along with Phang, you see the shady dudes (still in full light) in Subliminalburbs. What you doo?...or do.

Kyana: The Foulites, naturally, suspect the very mysterious Mysterious Yergs (because rivalry always comes before common sense). They get you to try and sneak into their HQ in Downtown to spy on them, but even Reapers get lost in the infinitely confusing Downtown. This is where you encounter...

Ti'Ame!: You have also been instructed to search for naughty beasties, but this time to defend them against the Tacky Tie Posse (and possibly teach them a lesson for being so naughty, if you so wish). Wandering Downtown, you meet Kyana just in front of that funny house that's only there every couple of hours. Is she from within it's naughty doors?

Re'Kran: You notice more Ti's in the city today, even in the Submissiveburbs (where you totally never visit all the same). Suddenly a funny-looking creature rushes into you, knocking you over. He - possibly it - looks the definition of worried, and on close inspection appears to be some sort of GESS* of a cloning batch you haven't encountered before. "Quick," he yells, "They're coming to get me!" Problem - he might look GESS, but he's got four arms and two of them are blazing with electric energy...a definite Ti'Thing!

*Genetically Engineered Subservient Semi-human

[Phang]

"Well I'm glad you could join me, eh Giraffe? If these Tacky Tie Posse guys are powerful enough to capture people like Crystal, I'll need all the help I can get...not saying I'm weaker than anything Ralph empowered - no offence to Crystal, but its a matter of honour.

"That, and a lot of other things." Phang threw open the front door, which was well-used to this sort of abuse, and blinked around in the fresh sunlight. She stretched, yawned - and then her eyes met the group just across the road.

Their business suits were obviously expensive, but those ties wouldn't have sold on a run-down souvenir stand. Despite the sun leaving brilliant highlights on the rest of the world around them, it avoided the figures like the plague - or like it tended to avoid most of the Ix, who provided their own when needed. "Have those guys been there all this time?"

Without waiting for an answer, Phang struck. Shaking up the bottle of lemonade she blasted a load at them from across the street, shouting with all the power of a newborn lamb, "Git orffa mah laind!"

Giggling at her own random silliness, Phang spun round on a fluffy toe and stretched again.

[tramp in a storm]

Giraffe girl fell to the floor, clutching her stomach to keep her insides....in - as she was laughing too much.

then one of the men rushed over and started beating her but she felt no pain as the laughter nummbed it all. The man stopped kicking the hell out of her (as if that could happen anyway) and she stood, got a watergun filled with ketchup and shot at the man's posh suit.

"Uh-oh."

He screamed with fury at her and lashed out to hit her. she dodged, squealed a giggle and legged it, the man following.

[The White Blacksmith]

I growled and rolled back onto my haunches. It would take some skill to defeat this monster, but it wouldn't be too hard for someone with my training. The electricity looked mostly magical, and that couldn't hurt me- much. It hadn't noticed the tattoes on my arms, nor the emblems sewn onto the lapels of my specially engineered combat suit. It was still shouting at me-something about someone coming. I didn't pay much attention. My enemy's enemy is my friend.

I jumped up at the Ti'Thing, my long canines sinking deep into it's throat. It was over before it began- I swallowed the thing's heart as a way of marking my kill, but my senses were away from it as it slipped down my throat.

They were on the three black-clad men walking towards me.

[Phang]

Ok, that's two weeks. I'm going to, like, totally harass all those who have not posted yet.

Harassment. On the internet?!? How very badass!

[Cyberworm]

I Hope it's not too late to post a character sheet... I've been busy this week, so I always postponed it for tomorrow, tomorrow...

Name: Cy (Cyberworm)

Species: Bio-Mechanic, humanoid

Affiliation: Freelancer (just to defy your Mercenary alignment :grin: )

Appearance:
Without his holo-mask appears Terminator-like, with bionic muscles and sinews, his symbiont in his head protected by reinforced, almost impenetrable metal shield.

But with his holo-mask a normal human in a classy black suit, brown hair, brown eyes, and black and white dance shoes :D.

Awesome Powers:
Pure strength, uses logic and other mathematical means to beat his opponents by the materials and other means of weapons and contraptions in his environment.

The funny thing is he dances while he is hitting, kicking and turning so his motions are unpredictable. And when he dances he makes stances that make it even funnier. His metal body gives him great strength, but the alloys that it's made of give it agility and flexibility too.

Finished medical school, so he has knowledge of many doctors because of his great textual memory.

Not-so-awesome:
He can't swim (obviously), water short-circuits his holo-mask and he rusts if not oiled up after a shower of any kind.

He weights about a 1000 lbs but is normally built, so any sleeping on a bed is impossible, unless the bed is made of some heavy-ass alloy. ;)

Is funky and loose, footloose too. Sings and dances because he likes to do it and only a small number of people can make him stop singing and dancing.

When one of the innocents is in danger or is hurt he becomes a Good Samaritan and is easily fooled or led into a trap by the people that know that part of his character.

Biography:
Not much to tell. Some know me, some of you don't. ;) You'll get to know me soon enough. :lol:

[Meranos]

OOC: forgive my probable lack of a sense of humor, and don't harass Adalia to much, she's waiting for Harley to initiate the interaction.

IC: Nuts, nuts!... their not what I'm looking for, but they could hurt people... time to round them up.
Ti'Kyn! then put his elemental arms near each other and fired, making a steam cloud. (like a sauna!) He then grabbed a few of them, and put them back in Headslam'd! Mental Institute. After a while, he caught them all. Afterwards, he continued looking for naughty beasties.

OOC:... I guess I'll leave it at that... :smile:

[Phang]

Ok, two left and they depend on each other, and a new character! Good going for me.


So, Cyberworm...let's see...

Cyberworm: Leaving the Mysterious Yergs Dance-a-thon (you came second - gargoyles came first), you are wandering round the Downtown district of Unnamed, heading towards Downertown. A net of steel wire falls out of the blue, followed by a very large four-winged dragon! It likely wants your Pick 'N' Mix...if you have any.

[Cyberworm]

Could oyu give me a hint of what I am able to do? Any objects in my surroundings?

[Phang]

Let's see now...people...a parked car...a statue of Ronald the Depantsed, who combatted a thousand angry fish with no underwear on. Good old bad young Ronald.

[Adalia]

"That wasn't so helpful." she muttered under her breath as she exited through the door. The men inside had been strange and elusive. They refused to answer her questions. Instead, they chose to argue back and forth about the directions she needed. She had exited, sadly empty-handed. Suddenly, she bumped into an unusually graceful human.

"Pardon me." she said, moving out of the way to let her pass. The human moved in front of her, glaring icily. She clumsily held her scythe in front of her, preparing herself for anything.

[Guest]

"Damn it, I've lost it," Ti'Ame! snarled as she turned the corner and she found that she lost the beastie that she was chasing. That's when she noticed the strange house. But that wasn't what surprised her. It was a foulite. This is the first one she had ever seen in person, she had always seen pictures of them. She was a tad bit curious at first, but then she noticed the scythe. Her tail was twitching as well as her ears. She brought one one hand in front of her face, sharp nails ready to attack or defend.

[Cyberworm]

I'll wait until the four-winged figure gets clear. No need for panicking. Yet.

[Phang]

Solvent Cream is Persil!

Phang: Girrafe Girl's ran off with one of the dudes following her. The rest are after you. Crap.

Ti'Kyn!: Seeing as you found nothing at Headslamm'd, your next port of call is GESSwerk in Downertown, where there are generally a few inhumans hanging around, owned by the company or otherwise. Truth, there are tons there - so which one do you go for?

Girrafe Girl: The guy chasing you catches up and corners you in Subliminalburb Park...

Kyana: Ti'Ame! looks kinda...I dunno...pissed off. Unless ghosts are, unlike real small persons, capable of bouncing back, you're the screwed unless that scythe meets some good usage.

Ti'Ame!: A ghost is pointing a scythe at you. Though it may not be the real Grim Reaper (who everyone knows is a ginger Japanese dude with a big sword), its still a bit of a worrying sight.

Re'Kran!: Stepping over the corpse of the Ti'GESS!, the three guys never take their eyes off you. The middle one suddenly draws a...ooh...it's shine-ay! You try to resist its mesmerising power...but it's getting harder...suddenly the other two try to grab you!

Cyberworm: The beast continues to demand Pick 'N' Mix, but you remain calm and uncompliant even when they threaten you with Protect and Survive leaflets (they come sharp, and quite naturally, they're radioactive). Eventually leaving you, you get up and continue on your way. He then jumps you with an angry cat!

[Cyberworm]

What? Who jumps me with what? :shock: Description and explanation please.

[Phang]

Cyberworm wrote: What? Who jumps me with what? :shock: Description and explanation please.

The dragon. I shall have to check these for obviousness then...they must be lacking.

[Cyberworm]

No, really, what cat? His main weapons are throwable cats? :shock:

[Phang]

Cyberworm wrote: No, really, what cat? His main weapons are throwable cats? :shock:

Angry cats are deadly. :-D That, and Unnamed never takes itself seriously.

[Cyberworm]

If he wants to dance, he'll have hi dance! I'll kick him out of the dance floor!

[Cyberworm]

On the other hand, I would rather kick the cats back to the dragon, like in baseball! :D Spin a bit and then use the centrifuge to throw them back at him! :grin:

[Phang]

Then be a-writing something, boy! I'm not you!...or yew. See that's a funny story...whatever.

Oh cripes. This was definitely the Tacky Tie Posse - after Phang. What joy in the eyes. With a screwdriver.

She wheeled round the corner of her house (the haunted, dilapidated one, yeah, that's right) and dived over and behind the Leafpile in a way reminiscent of young childs protecting themselves from scary TV. She extended her claws and clicked them together just as the dudes crunched through the damp grass, getting nearer every moment she hesitated.

But Phang does not hesitate.

She spun round, flipping into the air and bringing her tiny blades down on their heads. Gripping onto one of them she attempted to sink her fangs into his neck...

[Syranore]

Name-Syranore(Call me uncreative, but I don't feel like making up a new name)
Species-Dragon
Affiliation-Naughty Beasties
Appearance-Large, Blue,with wings. Somewhat like a dragon would look. Scales too.
Awesomeness-Burns stuff. Crushes stuff. Flies. Large claws and teeth. Can do magic if not tired.
Non-Awesomeness-Will take bribes in the form of large quantities of fresh meat. Has a sense of morality, if you dig deep enough. Can easily be blackmailed if you have information of the right sort. Socially inept. Shy at heart, but most people don't survive the surface.

Biography-Being socially inept, most of Syranore's experiences involving humanoids and other intelligent beings are bad, and so is inclined to dislike everyone but the non-sentient.

[Phang]

Yeh'll be added to the list then, Syra!

[The White Blacksmith]

Meeps! Forgot about this one, sorry.

I was instantly woken by the danger. I snarled, snapping at the two who held my front legs. They too seemed not to know my kind - they were paying little attention to my powerful back legs, a fatal mistake when fighting me. I tensed, ready to rip their throats out as I had the pitiful Ti'Thing.

They, noting this, smiled and lifted me off the ground. I was now powerless, unable to move. Clearly they were aware, more aware than me. Their companion was standing directly in front of me now, holding the shiny. I struggled, but could not tear my eyes from the...

[Bookwizard]

Ok i only really read the first post, so I hope am not butting in or anything, but here we go.......




Name: Moongarm
Species: book god
Affiliation: Library Clan= we fight for the power and greatness of books, even there is no point to, but thats the point even though there isn't one. we have no real enemies, but if someone takes are books then we do.

Appearance:
Awesome Powers: To "bend" books in other words to control books, and paper of the sort, and to have everlasting wisdom
Not-so-awesome: I have a very big weakness in water, and I have a weakness for jelly donuts
Biography: I came into existence in the library of eternal spirits, I lived there for a time and then moved to one library to the next, and finally I became the God of books, and since then I have been protecting sacred and common books from the hurting hand. Now i will fight in this war in the name of books!


Well I hope that I did the correctly, and i have no idea where we are in this story so all need a little caching up on things.




GO LIBRARY CLAN

[Bookwizard]

Anyone there?

[The White Blacksmith]

It's only been two days, bw. Give it some time.

[Phang]

Ye calms down, Wizard, and maintains a patience, k?