City of IF

[Bookwizard]

The Philosophers Apprentice... The Encounter





The small village was very quite, as it normally was on sundays, everyone was deep in prayer... well everyone but one. he was a boy no older then 12, but very smart, his name was Joseph, and he loved to think.

He hated sunday, everyone was very quite and doing there prayers, he loved the quite, but it deeply bothered him why the people in the village were quite.You have to understand all of the village was strictly christen, the boy should have been as well, if it had not been for one encounter about a year ago.

A Hindu wise man had come through the village, he was unwelcome but he had items to trade so he was welcomed for a short while. He told Joseph all about the Hindu gods and goddesses, and of all the wonderful hindu beliefs.

All of this amazed Joseph, and compelled him to think for days into the matter, and came up with his opinion. All the gods must exist, not all of them good, and the different religions must just worship different gods.

He soon grew to hate the religion of his own town, it was so simple minded he would think, no diversity, no imagination, simply just one god. He thought that in each prayer people were promising go that they would never really think fully and they would only think of him.

This is about the time that Joseph stop praying much to his parents distress. He would walk around town in the quite silence thinking of other things. It was on one of these days that the encounter happened, just outside of the village somewhere up in the moutons there was a small cottage, in that cottage lived a philosopher.

In this particular world philosophers were very important people, so the villagers were honored to have one so near by. He would trade his wisdom and thoughts for things that he needed, as well he had his own crop to sell.

The boy was slowly walking through town when he saw the unmistakable figure of the philosopher in his blue philosophers robe coming up the street. He seemed a bit at the silence of the village, then he spotted Joseph, and an expression of surprise crossed his face.

"what might you be doing outside on the streets on a sunday my boy, I thought you would be inside praying with your family".

Joseph responded "am not so much into my family beliefs as they are, I spend my sundays out on the street thinking." then realizing that he is talking casually to a philosopher he bows low.

"No, no" says the philosopher, "you don't have to bow to me".

He then exclaims "why as long as I have lived here I don't think I have ever met someone whose mind is not clouded by there beliefs, its very nice to meet you... what is your name my son".

"My name is Joseph corder, what brings you to town on a sunday" after a pause of thought Joseph finishes his sentence by calling the philosopher "master".

"My name is Nicholas Quicksilver, but feel free to call me nick" said the philosopher, "and to tell you the truth I lost track of time, I forgot no trading was to be done today, all just have to wait until tomorrow to get some milk I suppose".

There conversation when on and on into the evening, and this is how Joseph corder, a thoughtful villager and Nicholas Quicksilver a brilliant philosopher became very good friends.





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




This is just a prolog to get people used to the story, the first chapter will be coming very soon, I would like to know how people like it, so some responses would be great.




;)

[Chinaren]

:-o Arg!

Okay Biz, I'm not even going to try and read this until you have put some spaces into it!!

When someone speaks you need a new line, and paragraphs should be spaced with a line between them as well.

Read the new SGame tips here for more.

I did glance at it actually, and you seriously need to check your spelling too. eg: Quiet not quite and Christian.

[Bookwizard]

Ok i fixed it up a bit, sorry its my first time, all have to get used to the format, is this ok now, or is there more work to be done on it :(

[Masterweaver]

...

No. You don't double space every line, jus the paragraphs.

[Bookwizard]

wait wait wait, now am really confused....... how........ mybe all look at SG tips a bit more then. :oops:

[Bookwizard]

sorry to double post, am in a bit of a hurry, but i still don't get it, you have to start a new line when ever a new person talks, but you should not make the whole thing double spaced, none of this makes any sense. :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused:

[Masterweaver]

Look at other people's stuff.

[Player of Fates]

Your not exactly helping MW. Here's how it should look like, bro.

Quote: The small village was very quite, as it normally was on sundays, everyone was deep in prayer... well everyone but one. he was a boy no older then 12, but very smart, his name was Joseph, and he loved to think.

He hated sunday, everyone was very quite and doing there prayers, he loved the quite, but it deeply bothered him why the people in the village were quite.You have to understand all of the village was strictly christen, the boy should have been as well, if it had not been for one encounter about a year ago.

A Hindu wise man had come through the village, he was unwelcome but he had items to trade so he was welcomed for a short while. He told Joseph all about the Hindu gods and goddesses, and of all the wonderful hindu beliefs.

All of this amazed Joseph, and compelled him to think for days into the matter, and came up with his opinion. All the gods must exist, not all of them good, and the different religions must just worship different gods.

He soon grew to hate the religion of his own town, it was so simple minded he would think, no diversity, no imagination, simply just one god. He thought that in each prayer people were promising go that they would never really think fully and they would only think of him.

This is about the time that Joseph stop praying much to his parents distress. He would walk around town in the quite silence thinking of other things. It was on one of these days that the encounter happened, just outside of the village somewhere up in the moutons there was a small cottage, in that cottage lived a philosopher.

In this particular world philosophers were very important people, so the villagers were honored to have one so near by. He would trade his wisdom and thoughts for things that he needed, as well he had his own crop to sell.

The boy was slowly walking through town when he saw the unmistakable figure of the philosopher in his blue philosophers robe coming up the street. He seemed a bit at the silence of the village, then he spotted Joseph, and an expression of surprise crossed his face.

"what might you be doing outside on the streets on a sunday my boy, I thought you would be inside praying with your family".

Joseph responded "am not so much into my family beliefs as they are, I spend my sundays out on the street thinking." then realizing that he is talking casually to a philosopher he bows low.

"No, no" says the philosopher, "you don't have to bow to me".

He then exclaims "why as long as I have lived here I don't think I have ever met someone whose mind is not clouded by there beliefs, its very nice to meet you... what is your name my son".

"My name is Joseph corder, what brings you to town on a sunday" after a pause of thought Joseph finishes his sentence by calling the philosopher "master".

"My name is Nicholas Quicksilver, but feel free to call me nick" said the philosopher, "and to tell you the truth I lost track of time, I forgot no trading was to be done today, all just have to wait until tomorrow to get some milk I suppose".

There conversation when on and on into the evening, and this is how Joseph corder, a thoughtful villager and Nicholas Quicksilver a brilliant philosopher became very good friends.

That's how it should look. This was the whole first post story so just copy and past it onto your first post. :)

Also, this story idea might cause a bit of a debate but I have no idea, likin it so far. Keep it up. Have no suggestions though.

[Bookwizard]

Thanks........ but i still cant seem to grasp this, you start a new line even when a new person is not talking and at different times, it might be harder for me to see because of my computer because it is so big that it just looks like it is double spaced, or maybe not. so I know you start a new line when another person talks but what about when you started a new line when a new person had not talked, what was that about?

[Bookwizard]

anyone there....... come on I need advice here

[Player of Fates]

When you say start a new line, you mean paragraph right? When you start a new paragraph it means your switching something around, either what's happens or what someones saying.

You start a new line when people talk to distinguish who's talking, same thing with actions. Example:

Quote: Jefferey spun around, and headed back the other way. His breath came in short actions and his eyes continually seemed to jump back and watch his pursuers.

His pursuers had taken the form of huge dogs, their teeth gaping, their eyes widening. Ivory claws scraped the ground that they ran on, digging deep grooves into the hard cement as if it was butter. As Jeffery turned a corner, they followed him, the long hairs of their back waving in the wind at their abrupt turn.

See, when I changed the paragraphs, I switched what was happening to something different. That's the way I do it, I doubt any other writer here does that or maybe I just don't notice. It should come naturally once you get the hang of it.

[Bookwizard]

well thanks, that helps a lot :D

[BStheGreat]

There is a big difference between the word quite and quiet. You used the wrong one. Also remember that the first word of a sentence should be capitalized.

[Bookwizard]

This story is currently on hold I am sorry for any inconvenience, but due to my business i do not have time to resume this story any time soon, and it may stop altogether, but there is a chance that it will come back at some point in the future.