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Grim Reaping : Chapter 4
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ashkent



Joined: 27 Dec 2007
Posts: 114
Location: Conversing with the Backside

Posted: Sun Feb 24, 2008 3:22 pm    Post subject: Grim Reaping : Chapter 4  

Chapter 4

The sign above Mr Bones’ establishment was embossed with only two words; Bones’ Holes.

I’m sure that some witty wordsmith could have concocted a more fitting and flamboyant moniker for the company premises, but I guessed Mr Bones had named the business himself and probably had a fair amount of pride in his creation. Maybe I am just hard to impress.

The shop front appeared somewhat bland to me, bleak and sparse of any kind of external décor. No curtains either, just large blank windows reflecting the empty street I would see if I turned around.

I will confess to not being the most sought after advisor when it comes to colour coordination and which styles are in vogue at the present time, but I know when something looks depressing. My entire existence is spent wearing robes of infinite black, moving in the grey mists between times and spaces, surrounded by the dull textures of spirits and shades of the dead and vacant souls of the un-living – as I said, I know depressing.

I drifted through the front of the building, through the closed door into the chilly interior, beyond to what seemed to be an office, and through the rear wall into the wall-surrounded yard at the rear of the property. This was where I expected to find Mr Bones, or what was left of him, but as was becoming the norm I had arrived early.

Somewhere overhead came the roar of an engine, a crack, a scream and the sound of something soft going through a blender.

A large tree branch crashed to the ground behind me followed by the swift pattering of a light shower, the continued roar of engine, a squelching thud and the sound of more blending.

I twisted around to survey the carnage I expected to see. I have noticed that humans have a certain liking for the gruesome and explicit details when it comes to violent deaths, so I will try to please with as full a description as I am able.

The death on my list simply read, CHAINSAW. The elaborate explanation of Mr Bones’ demise is this: in an attempt to allow a little more light into his rear yard, Mr Bones climbed a tree armed with a chainsaw to remove a large overhanging branch that blocked the sun. Unfortunately something had gone awry. The branch had snapped, Mr Bones had lost control of the chainsaw and the chainsaw hacked a gory path through Mr Bones’s stomach, releasing his intestines and internal organs to fly from his torso and land in an unruly heap on the hard concrete. I’m sure that is enough detail for the majority.

Oh, I almost forgot, when the chainsaw fell to the ground it landed on Mr Bones face, removing his nose, his cheeks, his eyes, forehead, ears and slicing his skull in two.

Looking at the damage, I knew this was not going to be as easy as it should have been.

The soul of any living being is formed of light, dust, mist and a touch of dampness to create the effect of what many call ectoplasm. These elements don’t have set forms, and are often found floating or flowing freely. That only happens when they act independently in the world. When they are contained within the living as a soul they take on the shape of the being they inhabit and become moulded in that form permanently. You could call them a vaporous solid. Whatever then befalls the being, also befalls the soul...

I expect many of you have guessed where I am going with this little lesson on the formation of a soul, but for those who have not let me give a quick example. When I collect the soul of a soldier who has lost an arm in battle, I collect a one armed soul from the one armed soldier. If that soldier had died carrying his arm, the soul would come to me carrying the arm. If the arm was lost, then somewhere in the ether a soulless arm of mist and dust would remain behind.

Maybe I am making this sound more complex than it really is. The simple fact of the matter is that I was faced with the chopped up mess of a body and a soul to match.

The shade of Mr Bones melted into existence from the various spilled parts of his corpse. Blood trickled away from the grotesque mound of torn flesh and exposed bone, in the midst of which the chainsaw continued to hack away at anything it contacted.

“Which part of you would you like me to speak to?” I asked.

“This is rather inconvenient,” Mr Bones’ lips mouthed to my left.

“Don’t worry,” I said, hoping to offer some consolation to the shade, “at least the pain will have gone away now.”

“Can you turn this way a bit?” the lips said. “My ear is over there.”

“Where?”

“There.”

“I’m having a little trouble understanding where you mean,” I said. “Could you maybe point me in the right direction rather than describing it?”

A pale three fingered hand rose from a steaming pile of intestine and pointed to a spot just of to my right.

“Ah, I see now,” I said, momentarily puzzled by something. “How did you hear that?

“You turned around as you spoke and I managed to lip read you,” the severed ghostly lips said. “My eyes are down there.”

The hand spun around to point in yet another direction.

Another thought surfaced. “I don’t have any lips to read.”

“I’m very talented,” the phantom mouth informed me.

“Not so talented with a chainsaw,” I commented. “Couldn’t you have hired a professional to cut that down for you?”

I watched as the shade attempted to frown and fix me with a stare. I looked around at the various sections of face attempting to create the effect, but being in six different places did nothing to help matters.

“I’m perfectly capable of cutting a branch off a tree!” Mr Bones’ lips said with a sense of outrage. “Do I look like I need to hire someone?”

It was too soon for the soul to have lost its human characteristics, so I assumed that the living Mr Bones had never had a good sense of irony.

“Right now you look like…how do you say it?” I paused a moment to think. “Oh, yes. You look like something the tiger pulled through the door.”

“You mean something the cat dragged in.”

“Ah, yes. That is the one.”

“Are you always this insulting?”

“I try to treat everyone the same, if that is what you mean.”

“Well then you insult people,” Mr Bones’ lips said, while his hand crawled through the rubble of his former body to retrieve an eyebrow. “I could have had that branch off without a problem if it hadn’t been for that bloke jumping out on me. He might as well have chopped me up himself!”

Something rustled overhead. I turned away from the disgruntled soul for a moment and tried to trace the sound.

It was not too hard to locate the source of the disturbance.

Crouched on the sawn off stump of the branch was a thin figure dressed from head to toe in a skin-tight green body suit. He could almost have passed for a West Australian Wanga Wanga Frog had he been a mere four feet shorter.

“Can’t you slice him up with your scythe or something?” Mr Bones asked, distracting me from the mystery figure.

“I’m afraid it doesn’t quite work like that,” I said. And it doesn’t, but I will tell you a little more about those rules a little later.

I turned back to the tree, but the green-suited frog impressionist had vanished.

“Bugger,” I said without thinking. I lowered my gaze back to the soul. “I don’t suppose you know who he was, do you?”

The spectral hand of Mr Bones had succeeded in gathering together a large number of the soul’s pieces. I now had the pleasure of speaking to a pile of random body parts as opposed to the same said parts scattered over the immediate area.

“Of course not,” the lips told me from their new position. “Why would anyone I know what t kill me? I’ve never done anything to make anyone want me dead!”

“I believe humans have a saying what is quite fitting to your situation,” I said. “If you would be so kind to look down to where your hand has placed your lips.”

I waited while the shade’s eyes rolled wildly, came under some kind of control and dropped their gaze to where a well proportioned pair of lips sat comfortably between two round chunks of ghostly flesh.

“I think,” I concluded, “you are talking out of your arse. Let us begin this conversation again.”

“Ok,” the lips conceded.

“Now, who was that little green man?” I asked.

“I don’t know.”

“Look, I am not always this amiable. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.”

It is hard to discern a look of wide-eyed concern in eyes that have no lids, but I could see a distinct glassy glaze of fear in the blackness of the pupils.

“No, really, I really don’t,” the pile of Mr Bones stuttered. “It could have been any one of them.”

“Oh, one of ‘them’,” I said. “I suspected as much.”

“How do you – Well I guess you probably do know pretty much everything doing what you do for a…er…living”

“Well, actually, I know very little outside my immediate work cycle,” I explained, feeling oddly inadequate at that moment. Humans seem to have a much higher opinion of me that I warrant. My existence and profession are fairly simple compared to that of other immortals. “I knew of ‘them’ from your former associate, Boris.”

“Oh no,” the lips said with a downturn. “They didn’t get to poor old Boris, did they? I should never have asked him to dig that –”

The look of fear returned to the ghost’s loose eyeballs, this time spreading through his various body parts and causing the mound to tremble like a Halloween jelly.

“Then you know…”

I nodded.

“And you know…”

I nodded again. It was cruel to torment the soul, but he had tried to keep information from me. there were worse punishments I could have administered. I could have made his afterlife hell…literally.

“Oh,” the lips said quietly.

“Don’t worry,” I said in an even tone. “I do not take such things personally, Mr Bones. There is little point to hold grievance with any being who is going to have to face you one day.”

“I suppose that is a good point.”

“That does not mean I like people who conspire against my existence,” I said with a deep undertone of menace.

“I suppose that is an equally good point.”

I nodded again. I can be quite dramatic and sinister when the moment calls for it. On the whole I have learned to abide many of the little things some find intolerable. Yet another unconscious side effect of working with so many humans and their emotions. I can never quite tell whether these nuances are curses or blessings. I may decide one way or the other some day.

“Now,” I said, reverting to my usual manner, “tell me exactly who they are and what you know of them.”

“Well,” the spirit began, licking his lips, “I haven’t actually dealt directly with them which makes it quite hard to tell much. They don’t carry out many of their own tasks. I think they prefer to remain anonymous.”

“I think I can understand why. Showing the intention of killing Death would certainly be good reason to remain hidden in shadows and secrecy. Do they have a name, this collection of deviants? Or are they only known as “them”?”

The shade paused, thinking I assumed. Considering the dismembered state of the soul I was quiet impressed to still be interacting with him in words more than two syllables long. While I waited, I idly watched the forgotten chainsaw hack its merry way through Mr Bones equally forgotten left leg a short distance across the yard. I wondered if it would run out of petrol before it ran out of items to slice up.

“I remember!” the lips yelled. “I remember what their lackey called them!”

Ok this isn't the most dramatic DP by way of where the story goes next, but it is going to name one of the major players in the story. What name are "them" using as they work on their sinister plots? And the next chapter will contain a storyline focussing DP...promise. :)
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Chinaren



Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Posts: 8878
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com

Posted: Sun Feb 24, 2008 7:57 pm    Post subject:  

Hey Ask. I'll get around to reading this asap. It's not a capital crime, but we try to discourage half chapters. Just fyi.
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ashkent



Joined: 27 Dec 2007
Posts: 114
Location: Conversing with the Backside

Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2008 6:18 am    Post subject:  

Ok, I've now added the rest of the chapter so the whole of Chapter 4 is now up. :) I hope it keeps the chainsaw devotees happy :D
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Chinaren



Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Posts: 8878
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com

Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2008 4:59 pm    Post subject:  

Mmm. ~Thinks hard~ Damn, I'm really not good at this in the morning.

The Deadly Black Sinisters? The Doommerchants of the Apocolypse? The Pretty Pink Felons of Death? (There's a girl on the squad who doesn't think everything should be dull).

That's it. I'm out.
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LordoftheNight



Joined: 11 Aug 2005
Posts: 5276
Location: Hell

Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2008 6:39 pm    Post subject:  

Anonymous
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Kalanna Rai



Joined: 21 Jan 2006
Posts: 3102
Location: The Frozen North

Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2008 10:27 pm    Post subject:  

The Normal People....
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The Meaning Of Fear



Joined: 06 May 2006
Posts: 980
Location: In a deep, dark corner of the universe, plotting.

Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 10:37 pm    Post subject:  

Google :lol:

I'm fresh out of idearium now, so theres my suggestion.

~Holds Breath~ :shock:
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Crunchyfrog



Joined: 12 Dec 2006
Posts: 3998

Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 12:52 am    Post subject:  

A gigglesome chapter!


For the DP... they are called 'Us'.

:smart:
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Cyberworm



Joined: 19 Aug 2007
Posts: 652
Location: Spatially found, temporal lockdown.

Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 3:05 am    Post subject:  

Why wouldn't they be called "We"?

That gives opportunities for word games. Like "We are doing something nasty." "You are?" "Not we, you idiot, We!", "Ah, oui." etc. etc.

:D
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ashkent



Joined: 27 Dec 2007
Posts: 114
Location: Conversing with the Backside

Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 7:04 am    Post subject:  

The new poll is now open. The doors close on 5th March.
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The Meaning Of Fear



Joined: 06 May 2006
Posts: 980
Location: In a deep, dark corner of the universe, plotting.

Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 12:25 pm    Post subject:  

"We"... 2 votes.

Just goes to show how many active imaginations we have here in IF. :lol:
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ashkent



Joined: 27 Dec 2007
Posts: 114
Location: Conversing with the Backside

Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 12:35 pm    Post subject:  

Sometime genius ends up coming in the simplest of packages.
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LordoftheNight



Joined: 11 Aug 2005
Posts: 5276
Location: Hell

Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 5:01 pm    Post subject:  

Incidently, if Anonymous don't win, I will be very, very, disappointed in the lack of current general knowledge on IF.
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Crunchyfrog



Joined: 12 Dec 2006
Posts: 3998

Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 2:39 pm    Post subject:  

Welcome to your new forum, Ashkent!

:tu2:
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The Meaning Of Fear



Joined: 06 May 2006
Posts: 980
Location: In a deep, dark corner of the universe, plotting.

Posted: Sun Mar 02, 2008 8:15 pm    Post subject:  

Hooray for you, Ashkent! :D

Unfortunately the move seems to have destroyed the poll.

::EDIT::

Nevermind that, it's in the chapter 1 thread.
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ashkent



Joined: 27 Dec 2007
Posts: 114
Location: Conversing with the Backside

Posted: Mon Mar 03, 2008 1:36 pm    Post subject:  

The Meaning Of Fear wrote: Hooray for you, Ashkent! :D

Unfortunately the move seems to have destroyed the poll.

::EDIT::

Nevermind that, it's in the chapter 1 thread.

Thanks very much. And i did notice the poll thing but i thought i would let it go as there's only a couple of days to go on this one. I did wonder where it had gone at first.
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ashkent



Joined: 27 Dec 2007
Posts: 114
Location: Conversing with the Backside

Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 10:37 am    Post subject:  

Well the poll ended with a mojority of half voters decided that we won. Well, "We" won, not we as in us, because we couldn't win when we weren't one of the options, although we, as in "we", was. Never mind...the new chapter will be up soon.
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Scrapper



Joined: 16 Aug 2007
Posts: 24
Location: A box. In someone's closet. Maybe yours!

Posted: Fri Mar 07, 2008 11:29 pm    Post subject:  

A very fun story so far!

Though I missed this chapters poll, I'm definately looking forward to seeing where this goes.
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scissorkitty



Joined: 04 Mar 2008
Posts: 789
Location: Escaping the Hair Lair

Posted: Sat Mar 08, 2008 3:00 pm    Post subject:  

What a fun idea! There's been a lot of tv. series lately about Death as a profession, so this is a really fun alternative!
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Bookwizard



Joined: 07 Oct 2007
Posts: 639
Location: Gallifrey

Posted: Sun Mar 09, 2008 12:47 am    Post subject:  

Phew, Ok I just read through all of these chapters, its a pretty good story so far. Well written in its own way and also quit entertaining... am not sure if this has polled already or not, but all give my opinion anyway...

I believe that they should be called "The Anti Death Confederation" who are working against death, and plan to try to kill him so that they may stay alive themselves. There could be some comical history behind them as well.
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ashkent



Joined: 27 Dec 2007
Posts: 114
Location: Conversing with the Backside

Posted: Sun Mar 09, 2008 3:11 pm    Post subject:  

Ok, Wiz, in what i think is the correct order to all of your comments...

I have heard of Douglas Adams, the writer of the Guide to the Galaxy books, and oddly enough I bought two of his books in a charity shop about three weeks ago but as yet I haven't read them...the main reason why I haven't read them is that the ones I bought were book 5 of the Guide series and another one that comes after all of them. Plus I have 700 other books to choose from so newcomers have to earn their place on the shelf through time. I know I've heard Adams mentioned when people talk about Terry Pratchett and I have read all of his books. Although Death features heavily in his Discworld books, that wasn't the direct inspiration for this series...it was American Idol...but that is, literally, another story.

And yes the poll has closed for this one, so sorry for that, but glad to have yo on board for future polls. The next chaper should be up in a few days or so.
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Chinaren



Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Posts: 8878
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com

Posted: Sun Mar 09, 2008 4:49 pm    Post subject:  

Just off topic a moment...

If you want to read Douglas Adams, read his two Dirk Gently books. They are excellent. He was half way through a third one when he rather selfishly died, which annoyed me no end. Though probably not as much as it annoyed him, if you see what I mean.
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scissorkitty



Joined: 04 Mar 2008
Posts: 789
Location: Escaping the Hair Lair

Posted: Sun Mar 09, 2008 4:50 pm    Post subject:  

Okay. You can't just throw "American Idol" out there as inspiration, and then leave us to our own devices! I am so overly curious, now, if you don't give us the truth, I'll be forced to fabricate one for you. And it won't be pretty.

(a naked Paula Abdul would indeed scare almost anyone to Death)
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Bookwizard



Joined: 07 Oct 2007
Posts: 639
Location: Gallifrey

Posted: Sun Mar 09, 2008 5:42 pm    Post subject:  

Ya I thought you would probably have heard of Douglas Adams somehow. But his best books were in fact (at least in my opinion) "The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy" which is the most random and funny series of books that I have ever laid my eyes on. He died though well writing the last one, which was called The Salmon of Doubt, which would be the sixth in the series. All I was trying to point out was, wether you haven't read any of his books or not, your style of writing is very much like his, care free, and with a pinch of randomness in it, thats why I continued to read this after the first chapter. Ok sorry about that, I just needed to get it off my chest :off:. And kittys right, how in the world did American Idol Inspire this, you cant just leave that hanging out there, now my curiosity is also hocked, and you wont get it unhooked to easily at this point. :lol:
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ashkent



Joined: 27 Dec 2007
Posts: 114
Location: Conversing with the Backside

Posted: Mon Mar 10, 2008 12:50 pm    Post subject:  

Oh dear..what have i done.

*Pauses to look down at the little pink worms wriggling out of the open can*

It's ok Wiz, I knew what you meant. :) And I can only take it as a compliment...although i don't take them well...I tend to turn green and rip my shirt and - um - no sorry, that wasn't me was it. Never mind.

As for American Idol....It wasn't the direct link to this story but it inspired the first Grim story I wrote (which is about half finished) based on the idea of Death deciding to retire and using Simon Cowell and the Idol (or in the UK X Factor) format to search for his replacement. It was my first exploration into this world, and when i started writing this one it was just meant to be a short story based on the character of Grim. I lost my way with it after the first chapter and just wasn't feeling the love, then four or five months later I came across the City of IF and...the rest is history...while bordering on being the present and future too...sort of....in a way.
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Crunchyfrog



Joined: 12 Dec 2006
Posts: 3998

Posted: Mon Mar 10, 2008 1:23 pm    Post subject:  

Chinaren wrote: Just off topic a moment...

If you want to read Douglas Adams, read his two Dirk Gently books. They are excellent. He was half way through a third one when he rather selfishly died, which annoyed me no end. Though probably not as much as it annoyed him, if you see what I mean.

Raises hand amongst the Dirk Gently fans

:D

Sorry, back on topic now. :blush:
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scissorkitty



Joined: 04 Mar 2008
Posts: 789
Location: Escaping the Hair Lair

Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2008 4:59 pm    Post subject:  

I LOVE the idea of a "Death Idol" show! What a hilarious idea! If Death is Simon, though.. who plays the other two judges? It would almost force you to incarnate other forces- like Time, or Love or something similarly predictable. Unless Death were to enlist the help of some celebrities who are maybe getting close to their "time", and get to be judges as a trade off for more life?

... but judging American Idol is NO way to "get a life"....


hardy har har.
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