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Yo Momma Jokes!
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Guest






Posted: Tue May 27, 2008 5:10 pm    Post subject: Yo Momma Jokes!  

Ok Yo Momma Jokes! Here's the deal, I have quite a few yo momma jokes, but at work sometimes, I go head to head against my team leader with these jokes, and I'm running out material.... Here's one of mine

If my dog was as dumb as yo momma, he'd walk backwards and wag his head
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DeadManWalking



Joined: 24 May 2006
Posts: 1005

Posted: Tue May 27, 2008 5:21 pm    Post subject:  

a yo mama contest that just happened

[17:42:01] Harley: Hey DMW....
[17:42:22] DeadManWalking: yes?
[17:42:39] Harley: Yo Momma's blood type is ragoo
[17:43:03] DeadManWalking: i know that one
[17:43:28] DeadManWalking: (shall we restrain ourselves to fat jokes or shall we go all out>
[17:43:30] DeadManWalking: ?
[17:43:33] DeadManWalking: )
[17:44:46] DeadManWalking: cuz if so?
[17:44:49] DeadManWalking: *grins wickedly*
[17:44:59] DeadManWalking: *which is remarkably easy to do when ur dead*
[17:45:04] DeadManWalking: or did she just leave?
[17:45:07] DeadManWalking: or not
[17:46:28] Harley: hehe ROFL
[17:46:59] DeadManWalking: (if i offend I'm sorry (as you can imagine, i don't do yo mama contests often)
[17:47:03] DeadManWalking: yo mama is like the Green Bay Packers; She'll suck for four quarters.
[17:47:16] DeadManWalking: (but i do know a remarkable amount of yo mama jokes)
[17:48:04] Harley: Yo Momma is so stupid she sits on the tv and watches the couch
[17:48:16] D-Lotus: hey guys
[17:48:43] D-Lotus: Yo momma so stupid she sold her car to buy gasoline
[17:48:52] DeadManWalking: ... I was gonna tell that one
[17:49:00] DeadManWalking: *&^%$
[17:49:32] D-Lotus: Hey Harley, have you checked out the SoaP comp. yet?
[17:49:39] Fats_Masterson: yo momma's so dense, that even light can't escape her orbit
[17:49:48] Harley: Yo Momma is so ugly when she goes into a strip club, they pay her to her clothes on
[17:49:54] DeadManWalking: yo mama is so fat that when she sat on a penny, a booger popped out of Lincoln's nose
[17:50:19] DeadManWalking: you mama is so fat that she has to iron her pants on the driveway
[17:50:29] Harley: Yo Momma's so dumb, she failed a survey
[17:50:35] DeadManWalking: yo mama is so fat that she has to use a boomerang to put her belt on
[17:51:17] Harley: If my dog was as dumb as yo momma, he'd walk backwards and wag his head
[17:52:00] DeadManWalking: yo mama is so ugly that when she looked out the window, she got fined fifty bucks for mooning
[17:52:32] Harley: Yo Momma is so old she sat behind Jesus in the third grade
[17:52:58] DeadManWalking: Yo mama is so old that her birthstone is lava
[17:53:19] D-Lotus: Yo mama so fat, it don't matter yo family don't have a house
[17:53:27] DeadManWalking: yo mama is so old that she still owes Moses fifty cents.
[17:53:32] Harley: Yo momma's so old her birth certificate says expired
[17:53:54] DeadManWalking: yo mama is so old that when i asked her to act her age, she died
[17:54:30] Harley: Yo momma's so short you can see her feet on her driver's liscense
[17:54:53] D-Lotus: These are good
[17:55:19] DeadManWalking: yo mama is like AC transit, fifty cents for a ride
[17:55:51] Harley: Yo Momma's so old she waited tables at the last supper
[17:56:34] DeadManWalking: Yo mama is like Bed, Bath and Beyond; Five bucks a throw
[17:56:48] D-Lotus: Well, so did Mel Brooks
[17:57:03] DeadManWalking: lollipops
[17:57:06] Harley: Yo momma's so ugly that the last time she heard a whistle is when she got hit by a train
[17:57:33] D-Lotus: (you could say that about anyone)
[17:57:43] DeadManWalking: yo mama's so fat that they didn't know she was pregnant was when you popped out
[17:57:56] D-Lotus: If you get hit by a train, it's likely to be your last whistle
[17:58:01] Harley: When yo momma was born the doctor slapped her parents
[17:58:27] DeadManWalking: (true)
[17:59:07] Harley: Yo momma's glasses are so thick that when she looks at a map, she can see people wavin
[17:59:13] DeadManWalking: Yo mamma is so ugly that when she was born, you mother said "What a treasure!" and your father said, 'Let's bury it."
[17:59:40] DeadManWalking: yo mamma is so stupid that she thought the English Channel was Channel 77
[18:00:00] Harley: Yo momma's so dumb she sent me fax with a stamp on it
[18:00:14] D-Lotus: Hey, that treasure, let's bury it thing is from a play
[18:00:22] D-Lotus: what a rip off
[18:00:26] DeadManWalking: (it is?
[18:00:28] DeadManWalking: huh.
[18:00:33] D-Lotus: It's for the musical "Applause"
[18:00:33] DeadManWalking: didn't know that
[18:00:43] D-Lotus: I was in it, I should know
[18:01:26] DeadManWalking: yay you
[18:01:44] Harley: Yo momma's so ugly she uses a line of make up called why bother
[18:01:46] D-Lotus: SoaP 7: Yo Momma is so stupid she sits on the tv and watches the couch
[18:01:51] D-Lotus: Oops
[18:02:07] DeadManWalking: I already posted a link to it
[18:02:13] DeadManWalking: and yelled vote at them
[18:02:16] DeadManWalking: a while back
[18:02:17] Harley: I used that one D\
[18:02:18] DeadManWalking: no one did
[18:02:33] D-Lotus: Hmm. It's impossible
[18:02:41] D-Lotus: Nobody gives a damn anymore
[18:02:51] DeadManWalking: i know
[18:02:54] DeadManWalking: :-(
[18:03:28] DeadManWalking: interesting, though, how we got six votes and six submissions
[18:03:49] DeadManWalking: (although i know for a fact that one of the people who voted wasn't one of the writers)
[18:04:39] D-Lotus: Probably coincidence
[18:04:44] Harley: Yo momma's so ugly that the psychiatrist has her lay face down
[18:04:54] D-Lotus: *sigh*
[18:05:02] DeadManWalking: ... i can't remember any more off the top of my head
[18:05:13] DeadManWalking: (wait got one more)
[18:05:27] DeadManWalking: yo mama is so stupid that she fell out of a plane and she stopped to ask for directions
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Guest






Posted: Wed May 28, 2008 7:54 am    Post subject:  

*people are walking on the side walk*

Your mama is so ugly, when she looks out the window she causes mass first degree murder.

Your mama is so fat when she jumps, she goes straight to hell

Your mama is so fat she rolls to her destination.

Your mama is so fat when I lay ontop of her and roll three times I'm still on the stupid b8ch.
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sparta12



Joined: 24 Jan 2005
Posts: 1201
Location: Victoria, Australia

Posted: Thu May 29, 2008 6:48 am    Post subject:  

Yo mama so fat when she stepped into the middle of the road when I was driving, I tried to avoid her and I ran out of gas.
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The Meaning Of Fear



Joined: 06 May 2006
Posts: 980
Location: In a deep, dark corner of the universe, plotting.

Posted: Thu May 29, 2008 11:27 pm    Post subject:  

Yo momma is so fat, she jumped up into the sky... and got stuck. :shock:

Yo momma is so fat, when she went to the beach and went for a swim the spanish (can't remember if it was the spanish or not) thought she was the new world.

Yo momma is so fat, she has her own atmosphere.

Yo momma is so stupid she sold her house for renovation money.

Yo momma is so stupid, when she found out her husband was cheating on her she grabbed a gun, and shot the other woman. She then proceeded to point the gun at her own head, which was when her husband returned. "Stop!" shouted the husbad, "Don't shoot yourself!" Then yo momma replied, "SHUT UP! You're next!"
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sparta12



Joined: 24 Jan 2005
Posts: 1201
Location: Victoria, Australia

Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 5:17 am    Post subject:  


Classic
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Black Hawk



Joined: 23 Jun 2008
Posts: 242
Location: On board my ship/ At the Inn

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 2:05 pm    Post subject:  

Yo Mama's so fat she jumped on a rainbow and skittles fell out
Yo Mama's so fat she tried to get a roll in Starwars and got cast as the Death Star hahahahah I will return with more jokes :lol:
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Sasuke



Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 92
Location: Innistrad

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 8:44 pm    Post subject:  

I've got one, Your momma's so fat that when went out for a nude midnight run everyone had to compliment her on her new black sweater.
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Guest






Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 1:48 am    Post subject:  

Your mama is so old when she sneazes she blows dust out her breasts. :P
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Cyberworm



Joined: 19 Aug 2007
Posts: 651
Location: Spatially found, temporal lockdown.

Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 5:20 am    Post subject:  

Yo momma is so fat Jabba the Hut said "Damn!"

:P
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Lord Byron



Joined: 18 Feb 2008
Posts: 56
Location: Dol Guldur

Posted: Thu Nov 06, 2008 5:50 pm    Post subject:  

Ur mom is so fat she has a satellite orbiting around her.
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The White Blacksmith



Joined: 02 Apr 2006
Posts: 2629

Posted: Fri Nov 07, 2008 10:24 am    Post subject:  

Your mum's so fat she walked past the TV and I missed three episodes.
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tramp in a storm



Joined: 11 Apr 2005
Posts: 1585
Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Fri Nov 07, 2008 3:55 pm    Post subject:  

ROFL!!!! You can get posters full of these!

Your momma's so stupid she tried to drown a fish!
Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the cinema she sits next to EVERYONE!

damn! I had loads but can't remember them! but two of the best have to be:

Your mama's so fat even naruto don't believe it!
and:
Your momma's so dirty that when she gets in the bath the water jumps out! :lol: :lol:
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msmelton



Joined: 13 Nov 2008
Posts: 12
Location: under your bed, eating your socks

Posted: Sat Nov 15, 2008 8:55 am    Post subject:  

Yo momma’s so stupid she tied to put m&m’s in ABC order.
Yo momma’s so stupid she sold her car for gas money
Yo momma’s so fat when she went diving the whales stated singing “ we are family, not my fault your fatter than me”
Yo momma’s so stupid she brought a spoon to the superbowl
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The Meaning Of Fear



Joined: 06 May 2006
Posts: 980
Location: In a deep, dark corner of the universe, plotting.

Posted: Sat Nov 15, 2008 5:03 pm    Post subject:  

Yo momma's so stupid, your dad said "It's chilly outside" and your mom ran outside with a spoon.
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