City of IF

zahark · Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 4:12 am Post subject:

I think the riddles are a good idea it makes your story more interesting and it allows us as readers to interact more.

Alegria · Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 7:36 am Post subject:

Voting will continue until Tuesday!

Alegria · Posted: Tue Sep 09, 2008 3:21 pm Post subject:

Polls are closed!!!!

The winner is to check Grand.

Be expecting a new chapter soon!!!

scissorkitty · Posted: Fri Sep 12, 2008 5:49 pm Post subject:

I love the riddles! I thinks it's a great way to make an SG even MORE interactive!

Guest · Posted: Sat Sep 13, 2008 7:46 am Post subject:

Congrats your story is added to the top ten on lots of joy! I say that he finds a danger note from the killer then he solves the dangers and stuff like the name of the killer, by unclueing the note.

Alegria · Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 3:25 pm Post subject:

II

Certum est Quod Certum Reddi Potest

James spun around quickly and started to sprint for the door. As he ran his hand went to his radio and he started talking into it. “All units converge on 874 Grand Avenue, now!!!” He noticed the sound of another pair of shoes behind him (it was the African American woman… Stephany, that was her name!), and then another, then another, until all six detectives were running full steam towards the gaping hold where the door was. Their shoes splashed through the mingling vomit and blood, sending it spraying every which way, leaving their own footprints silhouetted in red and tan. They raced past the police officer, leaving him to deal with forensics and the press. James checked his watch. 3:31. Uriel couldn’t possibly be too far away from the crime scene now. Behind them the scoreboard clicked ominously, violently to 18.

***

James looked at the scene before him, confused. He had just opened the door to the small house. There were Uriel’s telltale writings and symbols everywhere. In the center there were two bodies slumped over. A man and a woman. The woman was slightly raised, as if she had something underneath her. The bodies had simple gunshot wounds to the head, nothing excruciating or even disturbing, not after what James had come to expect from Uriel.

Then the recording started to play.

The scratchy voice- Uriel’s voice, was back. There was a woman and a man sobbing in the background. A baby was crying. “Come on, Ms. Lamdon.” The grating of the voice was terrible.

A woman’s voice responded, shakily. “I am Mrs. Jackson. Why are you using my maiden name?”

“Because you two aren’t really married yet, are you? You’ve had a baby and moved in together, but you didn’t have a ceremony, you didn’t even sign the papers. God told me you were to be punished.” A few seconds of escape from the rasping. “You baby is the first to go.”

The woman screamed now, all fear gone from her voice. “You will not touch my baby!”

James could almost see Uriel’s smile in his head. “I won’t, but you will. If you don’t want to die a slow and painful death, you will kill that baby.”

“No!”

Another voice entered. It was a male voice. “Honey, think about this. We tried fighting him, but he beat us. Whether you kill him or not, John is going to die…”

More sobbing. It lasted forever it seemed. “Okay, okay.” The woman’s voice was choked. “How?”

“Pick a way, I don’t care.”

The sound of the baby’s crying swells and almost shatters, but then it stops. The woman is sobbing again, as is the man.

A gun clicks.

The man. “You said you wouldn’t kill us!”

A grating chuckle. “I said it wouldn’t be slow and painful.”

Two gun shots, and the tape was silent for a time.

The voice was back. “Hello my friends. I’ve been waiting for you. I’m glad you could make it. I think the commissioner will be mad at you for abandoning the Meyerson scene so quickly, though. I’ll put in a good word.” Some maniacal chuckling. “By the way, you gotta feel bad for poor Jack Ramen. You couldn’t even figure out the clue… Talk to you all later.”

Inspectors rolled over the woman’s body. The detectives once again felt the natural instinct to vomit, to cause some physical pain to themselves that would distract from the mental scars that were slowly forming, but it stayed down this time.

A phone rang. James slowly realized it was his phone. He shakily pulled it up to his ear and answered. “Hello?”

The commissioner’s voice barked. James could just see her now- icy eyes flashing, her hair a flame surrounding her face. It was not a pleasant picture. “You left the crime scene?”

“Uriel killed again, commissioner. We’re at the new crime scene now.”

“It’s not your job to discover scenes, it’s your job to discover what happened at the scene and how to stop it from happening again.”

“That’s what we were doing.”

“Just don’t let it happen again.” The phone went dead. James slowly lowered it back to its clip. The click seemed to reverberate, waking the others up from a trance. They looked around nervously. They had work to do.

A familiar song started playing.

“So I speak to you in riddles
‘Cause my words get in my way
I spoke the whole thing to my head
And feel it wash away
’Cause I can't take anymore of this
I want to come apart”

***

Melanie stirred softly in the bed. The said something in her sleep and fell silent. James could feel her delicate breathing, sense her every graceful move. She was like a butterfly, really. It almost seemed like she could float away at any second.”

James would not close his eyes. He was afraid of what he might see next.

The Ramen scene had been the worst yet. All the man’s extremities had been cut off with what appeared to an axe and strung around his neck in a necklace. There had been so much blood running down the man’s body that you couldn’t even see his skin anymore. The man was crimson from the neck down. James saw him every time he closed his eyes. This is where I failed, he thought. If we had figured it out, it wouldn’t have happened.

The phone rang downstairs.

James looked at the clock and cursed. Who would be calling at this time of the night? It was 3 in the morning! He originally decided to just ignore the call but then thought better of it. What if it was about Uriel?

He trudged down the stairs and hit his shin hard on something. Damn table. He continued his walk downstairs and fumbled for the ringing phone. He held it up. His voice was a little angry, a little apprehensive, but mostly tired.

“Hello, James.”

James froze. He would never be able to get that scratching, clawing voice out of his mind. It haunted him all through the day and now wouldn’t let him sleep. All the tiredness was gone from his voice.

“Uriel? What are you calling me for?”

“I couldn’t sleep. I must admit, I was hoping for a better response.”

“Cut the crap, Uriel. What is it?”

“I just wanted to talk to someone I knew would want to talk to me. I don’t care why you want to talk to me, you do, and that’s enough. I just wanted to tell you a story to help you get to sleep. Sit down, James.”

James sat without thinking.

“Good. Do you want to know about the first time I killed someone? It’s a good story. I was a senior in high school. I had always been in theatre and I loved it. My favorite part to play was the villain. My director thought I loved it to much, see? But there was a tradition of giving seniors the parts they wanted at my school so I got the villain in our last play of the year. This play ended with my character shooting another character. We used fake guns, of course. Now we had just gotten new curtains that opened and closed at the touch of a button. That’s important; remember that. So we get to closing night and I switch out the fake gun with a real pistol, just for fun. I shot the guy point blank like the script said. The curtain closed before anyone noticed any difference. I shot him in the chest so no one would. Then I put on the silencer and shot everyone else backstage, arranged them all nice, and opened the curtains and left. I even left a ransom note for myself so the cops think I’m dead. Isn’t that smart?”

James felt like he couldn’t breathe. “That’s sick. Why?”

“I just like to kill people. Some people paint, some people hunt, I kill people. Speaking of which, you should probably hurry and solve that riddle I gave you earlier.” The phone went dead.

In the commissioner’s office the scoreboard came to life, as if in preparation.

Police:0

U+03C6: 18

DP!!!!

Okay, you can try to solve the riddle (that answer, which is preferable due to someone keeping their life, will automatically win if found).

Other than that, please throw some suggestions out there just in case!

Happy solving!

DeadManWalking · Joined: 24 May 2006 Posts: 1005

Nice.

although why would a ransom note make people think you were dead?

do you mean make them think he was innocent?

you would think that people would start hunting to find him.

Phantomfan · Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 4:27 pm Post subject:

Wow- I love the story that Uriel told him... that was awesome!!!

As far as the clue goes, I'm afraid I have no idea at the moment... school is kind of sucking up my creativity.

But I will take another look at it when I get a free moment.

Well done!

Black Hawk · Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 11:54 am Post subject:

Still can't figure the riddle and congrats on the nomination

TruePurple · Joined: 18 Sep 2008 Posts: 256

Why can't they track down the signal thats being sent to the scoreboard to update it? Oh and the spelling of kill switched from kyll to kill a few times.

Alegria · Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2008 12:01 pm Post subject:

Okay, here's a hint.

Look in the first part of the chapter

;)

TruePurple · Joined: 18 Sep 2008 Posts: 256

Once I started encountering the gruesome I skimmed. I don't want to be reading stuff like that. Moreless scouring the text for what ever your talking about. Please just tell me.

Alegria · Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 5:20 am Post subject:

I can't just TELL you...

That would ruin the fun.

TruePurple · Joined: 18 Sep 2008 Posts: 256

Eh? Fun? I mean why don't they try to trace the signal. Unless your saying they have?(if so just please quote me the text then so I don't have to read the gore to find it) But I searched the pages for the word scoreboard and I didn't see any sign of them trying to analyze what I would imagine would be a very important piece of evidence in a real investigation.

If its set automatic to do things at at a specific time then that could be useful too. Have the tech department (carefully in case of booby traps) take it apart and find out what time its set to change, that would tell them the timetable of their foe. Hell, if its set automatically then they could find out alot of information ahead of the murderers time table.

Plus stuff like.. fingerprints on anything in it, where do they sell scoreboards like that and whos bought them recently (or any thefts) Same with any custom components installed. Also who might have the tech know how to make such a item and how that adds to the murderers profile.

Point is police usually have more options then jumping through some scumbags hoops. Especially when their opponent leaves behind physical evidence like a custom made scoreboard.

Unless your saying the murderer is someone higher up in the police and its holding down the investigation? I'd still say someone in the police would think of this and question why its not being done.

Alegria · Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 12:08 pm Post subject:

Oh, I was talking about the hint.

That is an excellent suggestion, Purple, and was an option last vote.

zahark · Posted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 5:27 am Post subject:

i still have no clue to what the answer to the riddle is.
but great chapey anyway.

as for a sugestion mabey thet try to trace the phonecall to figure out who it is and where they are

Alegria · Posted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 10:43 am Post subject:

Yay! Finally someone posted.

If I don't get a correct answer for the poll in a week we'll vote on the options.

Alegria · Posted: Tue Oct 21, 2008 6:33 pm Post subject:

Okay, no one has even guessed at this riddle, and we have to move the SG along, so here's the solution.

The song Uriel played was named Epiphany (by Staind, but that's not important).

Early in the chapter it is revealed that one of the investigator's name is Stephany.

They rhyme and end with the same last 5 letters.

So now Stephany has to die.

Ah well, better luck next time.

Vote, please!!!

The Meaning Of Fear · Posted: Tue Oct 21, 2008 11:36 pm Post subject:

A few mistakes from CH1.

Quote: There were burn Jamess all over her body

Not sure what you mean here.

Quote: the holes and dried puss caked the areas around the burns.

pus.

Quote: They new the commissioner was on edge.

knew.

And some from the latest chapter.

Quote: The said something in her sleep and fell silent.

Maybe, "Then said something in her sleep and fell silent."? But if it was then you would have to remove the full stop that was before "The said" and replace it with a comma.

Quote: My director thought I loved it to much, see?

too.

Very nicely done. Very, very dark, it's quite similar to Jack's writing.

I don't have much time to post any more comments at the moment, but I'll come back with a bit more thought later.

Alegria · Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 4:50 am Post subject:

Okay, guys.

The poll is now closed. The selected option was to investigate the High School story.

I'm going to try to put the next chappy out close to Halloween, so be watching ;)

Alegria · Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2008 1:49 pm Post subject:

Hey guys, I'm working on the chapter right now as I type. Expect it up later tonight or next morning.

Sorry if it's not in as scheduled!

Alegria · Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2008 8:54 pm Post subject:

III
Per Angusta ad Augusta

The sun rose, a hot, burning disk in the sky. James was still busy on the phone, checking all the high schools in the area. He was now on the phone with Nelson Sr. High, speaking with the principal.

“Hello, Mr. Vaqueros? My name is James and I’m an investigator with the police. It’s very important you answer this question truthfully. Has there ever been a mass killing at this high school by anyone? Especially in the theatre department?”

“…No, I haven’t heard of anything like that. Why?”

James swore under his breath. All night he had been checking old newspaper articles, making calls, and hoping against all hope that he could find a lead. “It’s nothing. Have a good day, Mr. Vaqueros.”

Melanie floated down the stairs. She was like a butterfly. James watched her and grinned half-heartedly. She yawned and stretched. She glided over to him and planted a small peck on his cheek. Rubbing some sleep from her eyes, she looked around the kitchen. It looked like a tornado had ravaged the countertops. She motioned to the mountains of newspapers and telephone books scattered about the room. “What’s all this about?”

James was about to tell her about Uriel’s call, but stopped. It would be better if she didn’t know. He wanted her to feel safe. “A new lead on the Uriel case,” he mumbled. “Don’t worry about it; just go get ready for work.”

She playfully punched him in the arm. “You should take your own advice. It’s almost eight.”

James sighed. He’d rather do anything than face that commissioner with the cold eyes again.

***

James nudged open the conference room door. Something was wrong. He had been late getting to the station and no one had said anything, not even as a joke. The station was quiet; far too quiet…

There, sitting at the table, was the team. The commissioner was pacing at the front of the room, silent. She glanced at James when he walked in, but she didn’t yell. She didn’t even seem to register his presence, or his tardiness. James mentally checked off all the team members. There was the tall blonde man, David. There were the two women, the brunettes who looked strikingly similar but weren’t related. James had forgotten their names. There was Cameron, the short, olive skinned guy. But where was the African-American? Where was Stephany?

The answer to his question dawned on him.

He spoke in a cone of silence. “It was… Stephany…” He was sure no one else could have heard him, but one of the brunettes nodded slowly, her eyes misty. James sat down in one of the chairs slowly. He had hardly known her, but all the detectives had been… connected by the horrors they had witnessed. If Uriel could get to one of them, he could get to them all.

After a few seconds that were an eternity, the commissioner spoke. “I…” She cleared her throat. For once she did not seem so threatening. “I checked all the local high schools about Uriel’s story. None of them had ever had anything like that happen. So I asked some police stations in other cities to help out. Nothing, but they said they’d ask surrounding counties. I just got a message from Topeka. They found the high school. It’s in a town called Little Spring in western Kansas. Because it’s against station policy for two officers of opposite sex to go on an extended trip together, I’m going to send Paula and Molly. Your flight leaves tomorrow morning. Ask questions. Get answers. Don’t let this maniac go unpunished. Above all, be strong. Go home and pack. The receptionist will hand you your tickets and boarding passes on the way out.”

The two brunettes nodded slowly and silently exited.

The commissioner turned her gaze to James, David, and Cameron. “You boys obviously need some time to think and… as you don’t have anything pressing to do now, I’m going to let you go home to think things through. While we all know mentally that we could be killed doing our job, it never hits home until something like this happens. I’ll understand if you don’t want to continue with this investigation. Nothing in training could have prepared you for the things we’ve seen and experienced. You are dismissed until tomorrow morning, unless, of course, something else happens.”

***

Mrs. Mitchell was sitting on a park bench. The breeze blew delicately against her back and she pulled her cardigan closer. It was a cold day for autumn. She looked back to her book- a beautiful romance novel about a girl in the Olympic peninsula who falls in love with a vampire. Its paper corners were worn-down from thumbing through the novel to her favorite parts. Occasionally she glanced at the playground to make sure her daughter was okay, but nothing serious was happening. Susan was just playing in the sandbox. Mrs. Mitchell went back to her book.

She heard Susan shriek in terror.

The woman dropped her book immediately. She sprinted over to her daughter, leaping over the short partition and dodging the other children and shouting her name. “Susan! What’s wrong?” Mrs. Mitchell reached her daughter, looked to where Susan was staring, and stopped dead.
A hand was showing through the sand.

Mrs. Mitchell screamed. Other parents and children came to see. Suddenly there was noise and screaming and crying everywhere.

James looked around the park. The psychologists and counselors they had gathered were murmuring in confidential tones with the parents. David and Cameron walked up to James.

David looked at the bodies and the sandbox where they had been hidden. “It’s like Uriel put them where they would do the most psychological damage. These kids are going to scarred for life.”

There was no question it was Uriel’s work. His symbol was carved on the back of one of the victims. There were two bodies- two men. On the unmarked one the word “fags” was burned into the flesh over his forehead. Also in the sandbox had been buried a piece of plywood with Uriel usual writings and symbols and sayings. James flipped it over. On the back it said “Louis”

Cameron studied the name for a moment and then looked at the other two men. “Yes, but Louis who? I checked and there are about 30 people named Louis in the city, not to mention the suburbs.”

James saw something that caught his eye. “Hey guys, has Uriel ever done anything with numbers before?”

Both shook their heads.

“Well look at this.”

On the plywood was a chart of numbers.

----1
---1-1
--1-2-1
-1-3-3-1
1-4-6-4-1

DP!!!!!!

Once again, try to solve the riddle (if solved, that option will automatically win, which will save a life)

But, just in case you don’t solve this one, also offer some other suggestions to vote on!!!

Hint: Think back to school.

The Meaning Of Fear · Posted: Sat Nov 01, 2008 1:13 am Post subject:

That's a Pascal's Triangle.

A few possibilities:

1) The name of the next victim is Pascal.

2) Pascal is part of the place name where the next murder will take place.

3) One of the sets of Pascal's numbers corresponds to a time or some sort of co-ordinates about when/where the next murder will take place.

Also, the name of the chapter, "Per Angusta ad Augusta" is latin for "Through difficulties to Greatness". Might have something important to do with the next murder.

Coincidentally, that is also the motto for a school in my general area.

Anyhow... Great chapter, Leggy. Keeping us on our toes here. Uriel is doing a great job of concealing his/her identity...

Alegria · Posted: Sat Nov 01, 2008 8:11 am Post subject:

The chapter names have nothing to do with the clue, as James doesn't know he's actually the subject of an SG and thus could not use the titles to figure it out.

DeadManWalking · Joined: 24 May 2006 Posts: 1005

:-(

that'd be awesome if he could tho.

I think that happens in one of Piers Anthony's books.

anyways, yeah. It's a Pascal's triangles. So every number is the sum of the two above it.

I dunno what that means tho.

Assuming the two men were together, did they adopt a kid?

that might make sense.

Since the kid is the sum of the two above?

The Meaning Of Fear · Posted: Sat Nov 01, 2008 1:46 pm Post subject:

I didn't think of that... :shock:

Perhaps the words "Fags" and "Louis" have deeper meanings, too.

Alegria · Posted: Sat Nov 01, 2008 2:34 pm Post subject:

You guys are so close!!!! I'm just waiting for the right answer to be spelled out, and correctly!

YOU CAN DO IT!!!! I HAVE FAITH IN YOU!!!!!

The Meaning Of Fear · Posted: Sat Nov 01, 2008 5:24 pm Post subject:

So hard! I even used the internet to try and unscramble "fagslouis" but it didn't work, and I can't find an unscrambler that works into latin.

I then took all the letters, put them in alphabetical order, and listed their numbers, along with the number they add to in the third column. Still no idea...

a 1 1
f 6 7
g 7 14
i 9 23
l 12 35
o 15 50
s 19 69
s 19 98
u 20 108

Then, I tried to link the numbers corresponding to each letter with a number in a Pascal's Triangle. It looks like this:

-------------A
-----------A--A
---------A--2--A
-------A--3--3--A
-----A--4--F--4--A
---A--5-10-10-5--A
-A--F--O--U--O--F--A

It doesn't mean anything to me, but only the letters in the 7 row all correspond with a letter.

Out of the letters in "fagslouis", I've made the following words:

Glass
Floss
Gloss
Fuss
Gas
Lass
Sag
Lag
Soul/s
AFG (Might be referring to the stadium)

Also, if you take the letters 'AFG' out of the lot, and put the remaining in alphabetical order, you're left with 'Ilossu', which I google searched and came up with a page in a different language... It looks like latin to me, and Google's translator refuses to work with it and keeps telling me it's French, so...

Anyways, the page contains one picture that is probably related to christianity. The word "Christus" is written on the picture.

Those last two points might be completely unrelated, but I mentioned them anyway since, if I remember correctly, Uriel is killing in the name of God, so I thought this might have something to it.

DeadManWalking · Joined: 24 May 2006 Posts: 1005

I don't actually think Fags had another meaning.

It seems that this is simply why he killed them.

If you want to look for a clue, it seems like looking at Louis might be better.

maybe a reference to a famous louis?

Louis Armstrong?

Louis Vutton?

or maybe the name of the kid?

probably not tho.

The first two don't seem to have anything to do with this, and the third would be too obvious.

Well...
Louis means Famous Warrior.

It was also the names of Various Kings.
A modified form of Louis is Ludwig, the first name of Beethoven.

It comes from Clovis, a german chieftan who took over france back when it was kinda under Roman control.

I dunno what else to say about it.

The Meaning Of Fear · Posted: Sat Nov 01, 2008 6:34 pm Post subject:

Yeah, DMW is almost certainly right... It's why he killed them. I just thought maybe it had a deeper meaning...

:(

I got nothing.

Alegria · Posted: Sat Nov 01, 2008 8:23 pm Post subject:

You guys are thinking way too much.

This riddle is a much simpler one than Uriel's other clues.

Think, but don't think too deeply....

The Meaning Of Fear · Posted: Sat Nov 01, 2008 8:53 pm Post subject:

:P That's your fault.

Ummm... The following is my guess:

Going with DMW's theory, if someone "was the sum of the two above it", then that would either mean

A) The next victim has the name with the letters of "fags" and "louis".
or
B) The next victim's name is an anagram of the names of the previous victims.

Given that the current victims aren't actually named, A is more likely. It's just hard to try and spell a name with "fags" and "louis" unless he's called Louis the Fag or something. Below are some horrible attempts at spelling the names:

Souis Flag
Fagis Soul

And here's another wild guess: Pascal's Triangle doesn't just mean what it is. Pehaps it fits into the name somehow?

Louis Pascal, perhaps?

Or Louis Triangle? :?

DeadManWalking · Joined: 24 May 2006 Posts: 1005

Or i think we could just go with the kid, if they had one.

That seems like it might be the answer.

Alegria · Posted: Sun Nov 02, 2008 5:41 am Post subject:

DING DING DING!!!!

We have a winner!!!!

The next victim's name is Louis Pascal!!!!!

Congratulations *confetti falls and a marching band plays*

And it's a good thing, too. Louis Pascal is a man that knows a lot about Uriel.

Just as a note, every person that I choose for the clue has potentially large and helpful part in the story, which is why it's important to save them....

The Meaning Of Fear · Posted: Sun Nov 02, 2008 8:05 pm Post subject:

YESSSSSSS!!!

I feel smart now. :P

It was dead simple, so simple that DMW and I overlooked it as a possibility most of the time. I'm still dumbstruck as it is...

It'd be very interesting to see how Uriel reacts to his first failed murder, and about the information this Louis Pascal may present.

Out of interest, Leggy, are you keeping a tab on these clues and failures to interpret them? Are you planning to just keep on going until we've found enough evidence and suspects, and guess the right one, or if we reach a point where we fail too many and lose too many clues, and ends in the death of our main character?

Alegria · Posted: Mon Nov 03, 2008 1:05 pm Post subject:

I don't know.

Are you asking if I have a scoring system about the SG???

I'll see if I can put something about that in the next chapter.

The Meaning Of Fear · Posted: Mon Nov 03, 2008 10:29 pm Post subject:

That's kind of it. What I really meant was, in what way are you releasing the clues to us?

I understand that you have a victim for each chapter, but do each of the victims only have their individual set of information, or do you withhold info until we manage to save someone, and then release it in chronological order?

And if only a victim knows the info, and they die and leave us unable to retrieve it, then if we get too many people killed off, will we reach a point where there simply is no more leads to go on? Or will Uriel keep on killing people who somehow get their info on him but don't give it to the police, until he gets found out?

Not that it matters. It justs adds a level of urgency, and push us to figure out the puzzles.. or else. :shock: