City of IF

[Dragonite]

Prologue:

Two men were walking across the shadowy street one holding a staff, the other holding a Bow & Arrow.

"Have you made sure we haven't been followed Hawk?", The First man said sternly

"I'm absolutely sure Dragonite, there hasn't been any suspicious activity going on", Black Hawk replied.

They continued talking. "Now you have heard about the continued attacks on the City right?", Dragonite continued

"Yes it is very sad to hear about all those families perishin.. Oops" Black Hawk stopped. Dragonite's face had sunken into a sad frown. He walked up ahead.

Black Hawk hurried up to him and said, "I didn't mean to say that buddy, I'm sorry"

He turned and said "That is alright my dear friend"

Then in the distance there was a scream.

"What was that?" Dragonite said

"I think it was a scream" Hawk replied

"I KNOW THAT!" Dragonite barked and he started to change. Scales Replaced skin, his ears lengthened and went pointed, his teeth grew sharp, a tail shot out from underneath the robe he wore and horns grew out of his long black hair.

Hawk blinked his eyes and shrunk, his mouth and nose grew longer and sharper into a beak, his arms turned to wings his clothes merged with his feathered skin.

Where two traveling friends stood now stood a Dragon and a Hawk. Dragonite and Black Hawk shot of from the ground and shot towards the screaming voice picking up speed with every passing second.

When they reached the spot where the heard the scream coming from the look around. There in the middle of the ground was a voice recorder laying on the ground pumping out the screaming voice.

A Second Later the two friends felt a whack in the back of their heads and fell to the ground.

What Happens Next? Just wait till the first chapter comes out!

[Alegria]

Hey Dragonite!

A very interesting story you have here, especially the subtle hints of a background for yourself.

I know this is a prolouge, and I've had to deal with this also, but try to keep chapters at least 1000 words long. It sounds like the chapters would be too long, but you'd be suprised.

[The Meaning Of Fear]

Pretty interesting. Short, like Leggy said, but this is a prologue, so that's to be expected.

I've already told you my feedback on chat.

Looking foward to first chapter.

[Dragonite]

Chapter 1: A new Friend

Dragonite woke up tired and in need of water.

He looked around. He and Black Hawk seemed to be in a damp and foul smelling basement.

“Dam its cold in here” Hawk said with a quiver to his voice

“You two need help?” a voice said. Dragonite looked around and saw a shining pale Girl standing a short way away holding twin daggers

“Uhh…yeah, I guess we do?” Black Hawk said.

She walked up and stepped through the bars. She pulled her daggers back and whacked the back of the lock. As she stood there the whole cage fell apart.

“Names Margaret, But my friends call me Phantom.” She said pushing back her white hair.

Dragonite stood up and shook her hand. “Nice to meet you, Where are we?” He said looking around.

Margaret looked around quite calmly, “Were in the Dungeon of my Fathers Kingdom.”

Dragonite got up and looked around. “Well what now? Your going to escort us out?” He said

“WHAT? Of course not! I’ve just come to take you to the king for your Execution.” She said frowning. She pulled a bottle out of her bag and a mist shot out making chains appear on there hands.

They walked out the doors into the bright daylight. All around them there were boos from a hidden crowd.

“LADIES AN GENTLEMEN WE ARE HERE TO DESTROY THE MONSTERS THAT TRIED TO TAKE OVER OUR KINGDOM” A familiar Voice boomed.

Black Hawk looked up and saw the one person that he would never expect in a million years. Key.

A little dwarf ran up and blew a trumpet.

“Introducing, King Lock the Second. King of Harnesser!!!” He yelled

The whole crowd roared with applause and yells of joy. Dragonite shot fire in the air. But that only made guards tackle him to the ground.

At that second the dwarf yelled. “WHATS THAT CAT DOING?”

The guards hoped of Dragonite and chased after the cat. Dragonite looked next to him and saw a pile of chains lying on the ground.

“Hawk you genius” Dragonite grinned. He then turned into a dragon and flew up, smashing the chains. He flew up and circled the stadium. He flew up to the podium and knocked a couple of knights off of the stands.

He looked up and saw it was covered by glass. Not wanting to hurt anyone, he flew up and breathed fire onto the glass melting it.

“HAWK MORPH TO A HAWK AND LET’S GET OUT OF HERE” He yelled and shot through the hole. A few seconds later Phantom appeared In front of him.

“Move it Phantom” Dragonite growled

Phantom floated there for a second before saying, “Take me with you, I heard you live in Key’s City, I’ve always wanted to meet my uncle.”

“OK, Just move out of the way” Hawk said next to him

She nodded, moved aside and flew off in the direction of the City of IF.

What Happens Next? Just wait till Chapter 2 Comes out!

[Reasoner]

Good first chapter dragonite, my only suggestions are add more detail... It seemed pretty lacking in detail, but other than that the story was good... and then you need a dp, or decision point where we, the readers, get to decide what happens next in the story... ask people in the inn about a dp if you don't know what it is, they'll help you.

[Guest]

dude thats very good keep up the good work but its gay but because your ma bro i give it 10/10 :) ok you beatter right more or evryone will scream and there heads would blow up! anyway keep it up :) :lol: :grin:

[Guest]

I may be the new guy but that's some exquisite writing there Dragonite i think it might go somewhere. Is Phantom and Black Hawk real people because they sound like names that you would see around an RPG.

OK peace out and watch for me in the shadows!!!!


:lol: :x

[The White Blacksmith]

Phantomfan, Black Hawk and Key are all people who can be seen around this city.

And good first chappy, Dragonite! I'm guessing that the DP is what happens/who they meet when they arrive in If, but I could be wrong.

[Black Hawk]

very nice first chapter but like others have said it needs mroe detail.

*Waves to Demon Eagle* Hi yes I am a real person

[Alegria]

I am going to assume that this is a very open DP.

In that case, I predict that the trio will not reach the city of IF, but instead reach the rival city of OF by mistake and meet another "ally" there, maybe an IFian spy who's in a spot of trouble...

Dragonite, the way to add more length to your SGs and still not skip that good DP you want is to add more details and/or more emotions. Focus on making your characters more complex, until they're almost like real people, even though we all know them already from the city, it will add meat to your story, which is always good.

[DeadManWalking]

*rolls on the floor laughing*

lol Margaret.

sorry, I'm still laughing at that.

*rolls out the door still laughing*

[Guest]

Hey Drago you know how you said i could be in the story?

well this is my Profile

Name: Demon Eagle

Power: Shape Shifting

Description: I'm a Black Eagle that can morph into other creatures...WHAT DO YOU THINK I LOOK LIKE?

Weapon: Eagle Form: Razor Sharp Talons and Beak. Human Form: Gun and Diamond Knife.

Likes: Resting in the shadows

Dislikes: The Sun

[Gallant]

So, whens my drop in passing by? :P

[The White Blacksmith]

I want to be the spy in Leggy's suggestion!

[Dragonite]

Chapter 2

As the three friends flew towards the wondrous City of IF, Dragonite steals a glance at Phantom and is shocked to see she has tears in her eyes.

"Whats the matter phantom?" He said flicking his tail at a fly in his robe. Hawk looks over and lands on her head. Chuckling she strokes hawks head and wipes the tears.

"Nothing. I'm just gonna be in so much trouble when i go back to Harnesser." She said sniffing. Dragonite stares for a second at forest below wondering why everything looked so different.

"Huh? Sorry," he said tearing his eyes from the forest. "What did you say?"

"I said: I'm just going to be in so much trouble when i go back to Harnesser" She repeated with a small frown on her face. Obviously she wasn't use to having people ignore her.

"You don't need to go home if you don't want to. You can live in City of IF." said Dragonite, Then he directed his mind at Hawk and said in Mind Talk: Can she live in City of IF Hawk?

I think so.

"Thanks for the offer guys but where will i live how will i fit in with everyone? I'm a Pale girl who can fly and phase through walls" Phantom said

Hawk and Drago look at each other and burst out laughing. Phantom. Your gonna fit in perfectly. Hawk said in Mind Speak to her.

Phantom shrugged and turned her attention back to there direction. At the second she turned her head she let out a scream. A large black eagle came shooting out of the trees and smashed into Phantom.

"Gerroff me, gerroff me!" They heard her say as the eagle attacked. The friends took action immediately: Dragonite shot a ball of flame at the eagle and Black Hawk transformed into a duplicate of Dragonite and also shot a ball of flame.

Nothing seemed to work the two fireballs just went straight through. Hawk, lets tackle him

The Eagle seemed to hear him and dodged when the lunged at him. The Bird shot off from Phantom and Opened its beak. It was horrifying. Where the inside of his mouth should have been was black empty space.

And from that space 3 balls of pure darkness shot forth from the beak and hit all three of them in the gut. The shot took the breath out of Drago and he started falling toward the trees

Will the trio survive? Will i ever get any chips for this dip? WHO KNOWS! Well you can if you come back next time!!!

[Lady of the Shadows]

Wow! I like!

Just a pointer...
I have an obsession with capitalised 'I's when it comes to any kind of text. So, yeah....

Damn, I hate sounding rude, so please don't take it that way.

But, I still like it! Can't wait for the next read!

Oh, and, I think one of them will be badly hurt, and they have to rush to the nearest city to save him/her.

[DeadManWalking]

huh. Wasn't expecting another chapter.

Haven't seen you in a while Dragonite! howya been?

[Dragonite]

Ive been great DMW but looking at your profile pic...actaully ill stay out of that

[Guest]

hey wonderful story you have Draggy. Hope to see more.

[KoRnFREAK]

nice story, i agree with sumone should be hurt, or a new caharacter catches the fallin drago

[Dragonite]

Chapter 3

Drago eyes flickered. His head was killing him. He looked around and saw the Black Eagle standing on his chest looking angry

Wake up scum your under arrest for entering The City of OF without ID.

"Demon Eagle? What are you doing its me Drago!" He growled.

Oh shoot I'm so sorry I'm undercover The Eagle spoke in Mind talk. He got off Drago and hopped over to Hawk.

Hey hawk i didn't recognize you... If you spend to much time in OF you start thinking like them

That's ok, Whats OF? Hawk replied as Eagle was untying him.

Its our rival city it exactly like IF but its evil. We have been spying on them for some time now Eagle replied and started untying phantom. Drago stood up and cleaned the dust off his clothes.

"So...your on patrol here?" He said to Eagle.
Yep, hey who's the chi... Eagle never finished his sentence because a knight and a Hippogryph came bounding through the forest.

"Hands up, Your under arrest. An alert from King Lock was sent saying that the 'Super IF-ians' were coming this way. What a Stupid name ,eh, Tiny?" the Knight growled.

"Dragonite transformed to his dragon state and charged at them. Demon Hawk and Eagle shape shifted. Hawk turned into his human form and Eagle turned into a dragon as well. They ran and started battle. Drago breathed and summoned fire to defend him as he battled with the Knight while Hawk and Eagle tackled Tiny the Hippogryph.

Phantom awoke from her sleep and yawned. She noticed the battle straight away. With a scowl she sunk beneath the ground. She appeared underneath the Hippogryph and she pulled him under. The Hippogryph screeched and vanished.

The same went for the Knight he too sunk beneath the ground. Phantom rose with a furious loom on her face. "My first visit to IF and you get us attacked?!" she shouted.

"This isn't IF its OF we went the wrong way. Come on we better head to IF. You coming Eagle?" Drago said. He spread his wings and beckoned to Eagle

Oh what the Hell I'll come he said with a shrug and flew off into the air. Dragonite an the others followed, blasting into the air. To pass the time Dragonite started flying backwards. He did a loop the loop and and spotted the wondrous city of IF up ahead. He turned into a dive and sped towards the main gate.

He landed gently and walked to the guards. Phantom, Eagle and Hawk landed and walked with him. The guards were very strange. One was a Zombie and the other was just armor floating in mid air.

"Morning Gallant," he addressed to the floating armor, "Morning DMW," he added to the zombie. DMW looked him down and smiled.

"Morning Draggy! Hey Eagle, Hawk, Who's the lady?" Dead Man Walking said in a raspy but kind voice.

"Shes come to live in IF. Her name is Phantom." Drago said calmly.

DMW nodded and opened the gate. The walked in and stared at the streets of white marble. Alongside the street were a few statues of the most famous IFians.

The first one on the left was CrunchyFrog. He stood high and proud.

The first on the right was Dragonite in his Dragon form. He held a staff and sword.

The next in line next to Crunchyfrog was Christalnightshade. She stood with an immense power, she had a kind face and sticking from her hair were Cat ears.

The next in line was Gallant in his ordinary armor.

The last one to be shone was at the end of the street against a Golden wall inscribed with writing, Was King Key. He stood strong and burly with gold armor on. He held a Sword of Silver and had a shield.

Drago and the friends walked up to the street to the Palace. They knocked on the door to be welcomed by Elves. the Elves ushered them to the study where Key was working. The knocked and entered.

"Ah hello Dragonite, who's this then?" Key said. He looked over and saw Phantom standing there.

"This is Phantom she would like to be part of IF." Drago said to the King, Phantom did a curtsy and said in a Royal kind of way: "Hello Key."

"Wow she is so Polite!" Key said astonished. "She must be and IFian right away!" he exclaimed and signed the papers he needed to sign and he shook her hand.

Phantom was so happy she rose in the air and flew straight through the wall cheering.

What will happen next? Who will the Gang meet next? And why did Lock call them the 'Super IF-ians'???? FIND OUT NEXT!

[vgmaster]

They should visit VG's estate.

[DeadManWalking]

O.o a Gate guard? As if a respected entrepreneurial mind such as my own would ever stoop to such plebeian duties.

I'm very disappointed.

[The White Blacksmith]

They should visit me, because I'm just fun to be with.

[Dragonite]

Chapter 4

Dragonite and his companions, Phantom, Demon Eagle and Black Hawk, were walking down Main Street of the City of IF. Dragonite walked tapping his staff to the gravel as he stepped over the rocky surface of the grass.

He looked at Phantom and was amused to see her gazing in astonishment at the beautiful wall carvings. Chuckling slightly he turned and walked up his street. He spread his wings and flew up to the mountain at the end of the street. His friends followed as he shot up to a cave. A light turned on and he landed, Transforming back to Human form.

The room was magnificently decorated with a mini bar at the far end, a couch with leopard skin, Flat screen TV, Shag carpet and a Small Pet T-Rex eating in the corner.
He stretched across his lounge and turned on the TV.

“Wow Drago this is amazing!” Phantom exclaimed. Hawk and Eagle fluttered in and landed on a pair of perches near the TV.

Phantom floated in and went to the Mini bar. She got out a Coke and sipped it.

She spilled the drink when the ground shook and they heard screams. They rushed to the mouth of the cave and gaped at the scene below. A gigantic robot was attacking the city. On its chest was a picture of a Lock.

“No, it’s my father!” Phantom gasped. She fell back as a thundering voice broke out over the kingdom.

“GIVE ME MY DAUGHTER AND YOU WILL LIVE, YOU HAVE UNTIL MIDNIGHT” The voice of King Lock shook the cave.

“I got to do something.” Dragonite said breathlessly. He raised his hand and muttered an incantation of high complexity. The friends rose and phased through the solid rock. They entered through the floor of a control room. Dragonite walked across to a piece of rock. He pressed his hand against it.

"Hackra Opshran!" He yelled. The spot where his hand was started glowing. It then shot across the wall, floor and ceiling in a giant web. The light web continued until it hit the center of the wall in front of them. Two windows shaped like eyes appeared.

"You better take a seat" Dragonite said tensely and sat down in a large chair. He closed his eyes and murmured another incantation. He opened them again and he was suddenly a giant rock person stuck in a mountain. He tensed up and smashed the rock around him to break free. Dragonite had just become the Drago-Mountain
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Drago-mountain walked carefully past the tiny houses to the Robot. He snuck up behind it and tapped it's shoulder. It turned around and DM smashed it in the chest with a rocky fist. As the impact shook the robot the ringing of Rock on Metal was so deafening that on the Ground DM spotted VG Stuffing cotton wool in his ears.

The robot's chest crumpled like paper and it fell into the forest. DM walked over to investigate. As he drew nearer the head shook and started to smoke. Suddenly the head flew off and blasted into the distance. DM turned and walked back to the mountain. He sat down and closed his eyes.

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Dragonite opened his eyes and looked around the small room.

"Why is everything so blurry?" He said with a slur. He tried to get up but fell unconscious. As he went under he could hear gasps and scurrying of feet.

What will happen next? Will Drago wake? Will he be awarded? Find out next time!

[vgmaster]

I was mentioned ^^

[The White Blacksmith]

Wow! A bit over the top on the powers front, wouldn't you say? Tone it down a bit - noone likes an uber-character.

[Dragonite]

Well he is a Mage he designed that mountain himself. How else was Drago going to defeat a giant robot?

[Dragonite]

Chapter 5

Draggy awoke in the city hospital. Through his eyelids he could see a few blurry shapes. He closed them again then reopened them once more. The shapes were no longer blurry.

He saw Key, in his most clean outfit, there was VGMaster, standing nearby with a shining emerald badge pinned to his chest, smiling broadly was Smee. the current Mayor of IF.

He heard a raspy groan in the bed next to him. He turned his head and saw DMW lying in the bed next to him. He had bandages over his chest where a dark red stain had dried up.

Key noticed him awake and saw him looking at DMW. "He was trying to stop the robot. And the robot kicked him into a tree. He's OK. I hope." Key said slowly shaking his head.

Dragonite reached for his staff, which was leaning against the bedside table, and climbed out of bed. He staggered to his side and put his shaking hands on DMW's heaving chest. "Akruba Hyfrigar" He muttered.

That next second lightning shot down his arms and entered DMW's chest through the cuts. As his magic worked everyone gasped and saw the blood stains seeping back into the cuts through the material.

Every new cut on DMW's body closed up and sealed themselves as though they have been healing slowly for years. Dragonite ripped the binds off this chest and climbed back into bed. His head tilted down and fell asleep in exhaustion.

He dreamed of when he was a little child playing among the the other children. At that time he was a normal child. He was human. He fell like normal children, he was no sorcerer or dragon.

At that time his name was not Dragonite, It was Logan. When he grinned he didn't show pointed teeth. He showed normal teeth. He was just a normal child in a normal village. He would sit with his mother and father and stare at the beautiful City of IF from the hill behind there village.

"Logan, one day we will o to live in the City, One day" His mother would say to him as she cuddled him.

"Yes, One day" His Father would say. The scene then dissolved and turned to a day five weeks later.

When Hell struck loose. That day, a monstrous dragon attack the village and burned every house. his parents ran out and started shooting it with arrows, But the flimsy wood just bounced off its stomach. The fierce dragon roared and picked them up with its teeth. Logan couldnt bare to watch so he turned and covered his ears.

He heard a thudding as the dragon walked over to finish him. He turned and looked with tears in his eyes at the dragons face.

"Please don't kill me." The small child choked out, his lungs filling with the smoke of the burning houses, cattle and people. He start coughing loudly and sobbed. the dragons eyes turned from hatred to pity.

"I'm sorry, i don't know what came over me" The dragon spoke. Logan turned.

"I'll take care of you young one." The dragon sounded female. She lowered her neck and Logan climbed on. He grabbed hold of one of the spines as he started slipping off.

"Hold on!" She yelled and took off. The mighty beating of her wings sent a wind so strong it put out the fire. She hovered for a moment that flew into the clouds in the direction of Dread Mountain.

Dragonite awoke once again. He realized he was sweating. He bent over the side of his bed and threw up. He laid back and wiped his mouth. Drago climbed out of bed and staggered to the door. He pushed it open and breathed in the cold night air. He grew his wings and took off. He had a bone to pick with his mother. He arose in the air and shot to Dread Mountain.

Whats Dragonite gonna do? Will he do anything he Will regret? Find out next!!!

[DeadManWalking]

How am I bleeding? >.< I don't think I have blood.

[Dragonite]

Chapter 6

Dragonite flew steadily against the wind shivering slightly. His forehead was stinging slightly but he ignored it. He shot a fireball out of his hand to propel him forward. Thunder Clapped and the air around him seemed to waver. He shook his head trying to fight the sudden dizziness.

He dropped a bit and looked behind him. He gasped with fear as he saw his wings shrinking before his eyes. His wings were now smaller the his hands. He sighed as he started falling down to the ground. He looked down and saw he was heading towards a bunch of jagged rocks.

"GAFURU HARBETTA" he snarled and pointed downwards. He shock wave shot from his hand blasted the rocks to powder. Luckily the powder softened his fall as he landed with a thud into the powder.

He stood up and checked himself out. his scales were gone. Tail gone, Talons were now nails and hes ears were on the side of his head.

His shook his head and sat down again. He was sweating and panting and in need of rest. Why had he lost his ability to turn into a dragon? Now he was a Human.

He laid down and closed his eyes.

The next morning her woke to a growling noise. He opened his eyes and saw a pack of wolves circling him dangerously. He jumped and drew breath getting ready to breath fire on them. But he then remembered he cant do that anymore.

"Somebody doesn't like me up there" Dragonite said bitterly. He stood back and stared at the dangerous pack of wolves

"STOP" a thundering voice echoed behind the trees. The wolves stepped back and bowed in the direction of the voice. out of the trees Dragonite's brother Wolfen walked out.

"Drago! How grand to see you!" Wolfen exclaimed. Wolfen had the ability to transform to but not to a dragon but to a Dark blue wolf. He stood on his hind legs like a man but he hunted like an animal.

"Why aren't you in Dragon form? My wolves wouldn't have attack if they recognized you" Wolfen said walking up.

"I've lost my dragon form I cant even get my wings. There gone" Dragonite said sadly, sitting down in the dust he shook his head.

"Well at least you got your sorcery," Wolfen added pointing at what used to be jagged rocks,"You could always make wings by magic?"

"It wouldn't be the same" Drago said sighing deeply. "Anyway I'm gonna see mum Later" He got up and cast a spell to create transparent wings on his back. He jumped and started flapping the transparent wings.

He soared up and straight away his path was blocked by Wolfen on a tree branch.

"Are you mad?!" He said "You cant go flying above the trees! Didn't you know? The WHOLE kingdom is after you!" Dragonite's head was spinning.

"Why?" Dragonite said scratching his head.

"Well word got out you've been burning down villages. There have been sightings of you destroying several cities near IF." Wolfen said scratching his ear.

"That's impossible! I've been powerless since last night!" Dragonite said. He grabbed at his hair.

"I know I believe you! That must mean someone is impersonating you. Or...it is you. But not you. More like your Doppelganger!" Wolfen said quickly.

"Doppel-What?" Dragonite said confused. Wolfen sighed and started to explain.

"A Doppelganger is a complete copy of a person. Sometimes the Doppelganger can be friendly. Other times they can be completely Evil" Wolfen said. "Your doppelganger must be evil because it is destroying towns and cities. Why your doppelganger only just started destroying things i don't know."

Dragonite shook his head once again. Losing my powers, nearly getting speared by jagged rocks, being saved from wolves by his brother and now he has an evil twin. "This is not turning out to be a good day bro."

"I think i should accompany you on your journey. I know how to travel the Land with ease" Wolfen said. He pulled out a map and laid it on the tree branch.



"This map is wrong. For you the safe route is dangerous and the Dangerous route is safe but still fairly dangerous." Wolfen said grimly pointing out the red and green lines on the map.

"Fair enough where do we go first?" Drago said.

"First we must go through the 2D City of Whirled. Then we must go through the blocky Habbo Hotel, After that we will arrive at City of OF." Wolfen said. "A warning though. These Cities have different beings. When we enter Habbo we will be transformed into Blocky Avatars. To show what we will turn into I have this machine." He pulled out a disk and pushed a button. A Scanner popped out an d scanned Dragonite. It beeped and a projected a hologram of him as a Habbo-ian appears above the shining disk..



Dragonite gasped "That is one Ugly Dragonite." I don't wanna see what ill look like when i enter City of Whirled." He said shuddering.

I dunno... Which route should i Take?