City of IF

Gallant · Posted: Sat Mar 21, 2009 9:10 am Post subject: A long time gone.

The city was dark. It wasn’t just the darkness of the night, there was an aura. Or rather an emptiness where an aura once lingered.

A man walked down the empty streets, sirens could be heard in the distance and bits of newspaper blustered about on a wet road. His boot crunched on a bit of glass as he approached a statue. A gust came in from behind; he pulled his coat around him tighter. The collar and hat hid his features, but a sorrow that ran deep, set in his bones. He looked up to the statue, copper stained green on its shoulders like a growing mantle.

A crown glittered aloft the statues head, and a golden key hung around its neck. The mans eyes were brought back down to a plaque which he felt hardly befitted the deserved grandeur. It read, ‘In memory of our king.’ A sheet of newspaper landed open on the plaque. The long coated man went to remove it but a name caught his eye. ‘Young, handsome philanthropist leaves fortune and luxury in search of enlightenment.’

He read further, most of it was flattery and uninformative but what he did learn is the ‘philanthropist’ was indeed an unlikely candidate. Chinaren. He searched around the article for any other information and found a small smudged name at the bottom. It seems Nene’s journalist aspirations came to fruit. The damp page crumpled easily in the strangers hand. His hands looked gnarled and leathery, they were grey and had sparse, black freckles on the back.

He held himself as if he wanted to sigh, however the effort of breath was pointless to him. He trod off into the night, shoulders high and head hanging low. The city had definitely went down hill since he was away. The king was dead and the streets emanated a gloom so intense it chained the spirit like an anchor. This place used to be so familiar, now it was nearly unrecognisable. He saw ghosts of old roads smeared over by shabby, cheap infrastructure.

Eyes glinted from a nearby alleyway where a woman crouched in shadow. Their stare was hard and calculating. The cool blue iris’s flickered around absorbing all possible information. Then noisily they disappeared. The stranger stopped for a second and peered into the alleyway with eyeless sight. He smiled.

****

Nene flustered about mountains of obituaries and half finished articles. In her haste she knocked over one of said mountains, launching paper everywhere and nearly crushing one of her minions.

“Apologies miss, it seems I’ve failed to catch the crushingly heavy mountain of paperwork you just handed me.”

“No, I’m sorry. I’m just a bit clumsy right now… Listen have you got more information on the recent mafia killings? It seems they’ve been increasing activity lately.”

“No miss, but we have our top journalists on the case. I could get on it personally if you’d like.”

“That’s alright, all I need you to do now is grab me a coffee… and clean up this mess will you? I don’t have the energy right now.”

“Yes miss…”

The minion scurried about cleaning up the mess Nene had created and began ordering various other minions to help. This minion was clearly a higher rank than most others. After the minion had employed a small army of others to clear up he scuttled off to go find the coffee machine. Nene put pressure on her temples and closed her eyes. It had been quite stressful for her the past few days.

Nene collapsed into her big office chair as her small business bustled around, struggling not to fall apart at the seams. It used to be easier when she wasn’t by herself keeping the place organised, but this is what she wanted. She was living the dream…

She put all her effort into holding back the tears. All her friends around her had suddenly just started dropping off the face of the planet. If you were lucky she thought you would get a goodbye; maybe even in person. The city had gone to the dogs, and she felt she was the only one who cared.

The head minion scuttled back in trying not to spill what was a bucket of scalding hot coffee in proportion to his tiny body. He handed it to his mistress.

“Umm… Miss?”

“Not now… Thank you for the coffee but I’m a little bit stressed just now.”

“Umm… It’s just that, there’s someone at the door for you.”

There was a tall silhouette of a person behind the opaque window of her office door.

“Bring him in… Then leave us.”

The minion bowed graciously, as he always did and carried out his task. The man that walked in made Nene’s face devoid of all colour and her eyes bulged out of her head.

“I… I thought you were dead… I mean…”

“Well technically Ne, I’m already dead.”

The stranger took off his hat and revealed a somewhat ‘well preserved’ face. DeadManWalking smiled a full, toothy grin. Nene ran at him and gave him one of the most crushing hugs he’s ever experienced.

“Where have you been!?”

“Around, you know here and there.”

“Your going to have to give me more details than that.”

“Sorry Ne, maybe we could play catch up some other time. I’m here on a mission.”

“A mission?”

“I want to know why the hell the city is in the state it’s in. Though I have a few questions to get me started.”

“I’ll try to answer as best I can. I can’t promise you anything though, I’m in the dark about most things these days. Crunchy’s put a real vice on my business.”

“What do you mean?”

“She’s been taxing everything. Passing silly little laws that stop people like me making an honest living. If it wasn’t for Phan then I wouldn’t really have a business at all.”

“So Crunchy is mayor again. Where does Phan fit in though?”

“She’s the secretary, and because of that she has a bit of power. In my opinion she should be Mayor but Crunchy is off on some holiday and an election can’t start until her term is over or she makes some sort of appearance, which I find unlikely.”

“Right, anyway, I was wondering. Why and where did Chinaren go?”

Nene stood ran round back to her desk and shuffled through a drawer. She pulled out a small yellowish letter with a big red ‘C’ stamped in wax on the outside.

“That’s a question I’ve been trying to answer myself. All the information I’ve got is from a letter I received before he up and vanished. I’m not too bothered though, he left a mountain of fables to me. Just when I really needed them. Here.”

Ne handed DMW the letter. He examined it carefully before opening it to read.

Hey Nene, just thought I’d say bye. I’m off in search of enlightenment. I don’t where I’m going or how I’m going to get there but hey! Isn’t that part of the search? I’m leaving my vast fortune to the government, maybe they can start sorting out this place. Fret not! I’ve left a little something for you. I’ve noticed your business has been bobbing on the water line. So have one hundred thousand fables. It’s not even a blip on my overwhelming riches so think nothing of it. Farewell and have a nice life.

C’ren

DMW stood and read over the letter three or four times and finally came to a conclusion.

“This isn’t his hand writing.”

“I know, but it’s his signature, maybe he got a scribe to write it for him or something.”

“Maybe… Do you know anyone that might know anything at all?”

“There might be a few people. There’s only a few people that knew Chinaren well and are still around.”

“Tell me who and I’ll have a look.”

“Well there’s Lordofthenight, he’s kind become a recluse nowadays though. I’d be careful knocking on his door. There’s Syranore, but I’ve not seen him in weeks. He usually lingers about what’s left of the fantasy forest. And Smee, but there’s something you ought to know about him.”

“What do you mean what’s left of the fantasy forest, and what’s up with Smee.”

“DMW, you’ve been gone for a while, there’s been a lot of changes, a lot has happened.”

“Like?”

“Well after Lilith left, not long after you. The forest kind of… went a bit wild. Syranore did his best to look after it but it became too much. He’s a dragon, nature doesn’t really listen to him like the way it listened to Lilith. The forest tried to swallow the entire city at one point. So he started a bit of deforestation, it went out of control and now most of what’s left is ash and wasteland. And Smee… Poor Smee, he’s getting old. All that fiddling with the arcane and trying out his own homemade potions has addled his brain. If you see him you’ll understand.”

“Hmm… Well it’s a start. Hopefully one of them might be able to tell me why everyone’s let the city get like this. Your included in the blame, as a citizen you have a responsibility too.”

“I know DMW. I’ll be here if you need any help.”

“Thanks, bye.”

DMW walked sombrely out the door. He left his hat on the desk. He pulled up the collar of his coat and fastened its many belts. It was still dark but morning was well on its way. He paced down the road on route to his new destination. From the rooftops a woman dressed in black bearing blue eyes and a few visible strands of blonde hair watched him vigilantly.

Alegria · Posted: Sat Mar 21, 2009 9:29 am Post subject:

Oooh, nice. I like the setting (of course), but I really like it how you made it an IF we aren't totally familiar with, one we can still explore. I also enjoy the somewhat serious tone of it, instead of the comedic tone authors usually take when writing about IF. Keep up the good work.

P.S.- I will be looking for myself somewhere in here. ;)

EDIT: FIRST POST WOOOO!!!

Phantomfan · Posted: Sat Mar 21, 2009 9:47 am Post subject:

NICE, Gallant! This is great!
Thought he thought of Chinaren giving ANYone fables- mighty suspicoius if you ask me.

just one question- Is this going to be an SG or linear? This may have just been the prologue- I may just be acting dense.

The White Blacksmith · Joined: 02 Apr 2006 Posts: 2629

*plays dramatic music*

Ooh! Interesting take on what's normally quite a lighthearted genre. Is there a DP?

DeadManWalking · Posted: Sat Mar 21, 2009 11:05 am Post subject:

Nice story Gallant! I particularly like the bit where I'm the main character :P.

Btw, though, the name of this story is exactly the same as Lils's newish IFtale.

Sooo...

The Meaning Of Fear · Posted: Sat Mar 21, 2009 2:34 pm Post subject:

Quote: “No, I’m sorry. I’m just a bit clumsy right now… Listen have you got more information on the recent mafia killings? It seems they’ve been increasing activity lately.”

Mafia killings indeed!

Quote: “She’s been taxing everything. Passing silly little laws that stop people like me making an honest living. If it wasn’t for Phan then I wouldn’t really have a business at all.”

:shock: Crunchiness taxes?

Quote: I’m off in search of enlightenment... I’m leaving my vast fortune to the government... Fret not! I’ve left a little something for you... So have one hundred thousand fables.

OH MY GOD THE SKY IS FALLING!

Very exciting, though. I expect I probably won't be making an appearance because I've been hanged (Assuming you're keeping canon with the recent going-ons) but who knows?

Fear never dies!

Gallant · Posted: Sat Mar 21, 2009 9:51 pm Post subject:

Fear never dies indeed.

Don't worry, there is a DP. Which person do we visit first, I tried to make it clear but meh! :P

Hope you enjoy the future chapters, after you decide what's happening next of course. I've got a juicy plotline, I hope you're hungry. :D

The Meaning Of Fear · Posted: Sat Mar 21, 2009 10:24 pm Post subject:

Meanie likes juice! Orange juice, mango juice, cow juice, meat juice, STORY JUICE.

For the DP, I think visiting the King's grave would be a good idea. Slightly strange, perhaps, but you might meet someone helpful there. And if I read it right, all these changes started with the Key's death. There's sure to be some sort of clue there.

The White Blacksmith · Joined: 02 Apr 2006 Posts: 2629

For the DP, then, I would suggest they go to visit someone else who has recently returned to the city, or go to the Gate of Sign In to see if anyone is returning from their travels. On an unrelated topic, am I going to be in this?

And someone hanged Meany? Do tell! Or if you've got a video of him dying, I would like to see it...

Phantomfan · Posted: Sun Mar 22, 2009 8:28 am Post subject:

I agree with Meany- go check out Key's grave. DMW being dead and all, he may be able to sense something regular people could not.

Or you could go try and talk to Syra- attempt to salvage what's going on over there.

DeadManWalking · Posted: Sun Mar 22, 2009 12:44 pm Post subject:

i think that I (it doesn't sound right addressing the character-me in third person) should perhaps try and find out what happened to the people not mentioned by Ne.

So like Phang, Whitey, Meanie, Nons, Gallant etc.

Or we (I'm just going to go with we from now on) could go with the Grave thing, or try and visit the living members, i.e. Smee or Snore.

Or as a fourth option, we could announce our return and see what happens. Although Ne might do that anyways, being a reporter and all.

That's OBVIOUSLY huge news.

Alegria · Posted: Sun Mar 22, 2009 2:02 pm Post subject:

I am tempted to go with the "people not mentioned" thing, but I'm biased because I'm in that group, so my vote will go to the King's grave. Maybe someone will be there, lurking....

Crunchyfrog · Joined: 12 Dec 2006 Posts: 3875

Atmosphere and intrigue... wwoooo! This is an IFtale with much promise. Particularly liked the opening scene.

I'm not sure visiting Key's grave will give up much, particularly as his death must have happened long enough ago for someone to erect a memorial to him, and a chance meeting at the grave so long after the event would be a little bit too much of a coincidence to be plausibly useful.

I'd suggest visiting Smee - partly because I'd like to see an insanely deranged Smee in this tale, :grin: but also because he's got more chance of providing a clue (whether it be intentional or not).

Very dark, very good. More! More!

:clap:

The White Blacksmith · Joined: 02 Apr 2006 Posts: 2629

Finding someone who's already around the city isn't going to work. Like as not they're already corrupt, and will doubtless announce his return to the correct authorities. I get the feeling that Dm's actions may be dancing about the cliff-edge between legal and illegal, and we wouldn't want Smee or Cadbury's (ooh, that evil little frog) finding out. Someone who's returning from hiatus will be much more likely to want to help.

Gallant · Posted: Mon Mar 23, 2009 2:50 pm Post subject:

By the way, that's supposed to say Smee's tower 'of' wonderment. Can't change it now though, people have already voted.

Sasuke · Posted: Mon Mar 23, 2009 4:09 pm Post subject:

You have the glorious award of my first post since being gone, y'know again.

Well first off, some nitpicking, I've found but one typo, but I'm happy, because this is the first time I've got one before someone else.
Quote: I don’t where I’m going or how I’m going to get there but hey!
I don't know where, maybe?

But, anyway, nice story Gallant, and just because I'm back off a definite hiatus, I'm going to F5 the people who've said someone off of hiatus, and someone not mentioned by Ne, yay for biases!

Gallant · Posted: Mon Mar 23, 2009 4:21 pm Post subject:

It's a good reason to vote for that option. It fits in nicely seeing it actually happened. :P
Nice timing.

Smee · Joined: 16 Oct 2004 Posts: 5202 Location: UK

Addled! Addled... why you young whippersnapper I aught ah tan your ... ooh a squirrel!

Schunardx · Joined: 24 Mar 2009 Posts: 1 Location: England

i like it simple but keeps people hooked

DeadManWalking · Posted: Tue Mar 24, 2009 3:37 pm Post subject:

Nice new name Gall!

Novelest_Ninjagirl · Posted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 4:47 pm Post subject:

First: the title is bugging me. Capitalize the impotant words PLEASE. pet peve of mine.

Second: oh my FREAKING god. this is AWESOME. I'm glad I was annoyed into reading this.
I didn't notice any spelling errors as I read, and nothing grammatical. I think you used the word crush twice in a row when talking about nenes mountain of papers and assistants. that's really it, except bring on the next chappy already. *prepares to drag brother into read and break the tie*

Chinaren · Joined: 05 Sep 2005 Posts: 8566 Location: Tome

Quote: “I know DMW. I’ll be here if you need any help.”

I'm sorry, but this definately doesn't sound like me. I mean, offering help? And for free???

~Shakes head~

I'll be sending some of my guys round to deal with this rogue clone.

Still, I broke your tie for you. That'll two hundred Fables please. :D

Guest · Posted: Fri Mar 27, 2009 3:22 am Post subject:

;) Hey Gallant. I had to read this twice. It hooks people right. The hugging scene was strange, becuase not everyone knows the relationships of nene and DMW and all other ifians. Where am I. Am I coming in the story :D

Gallant · Posted: Fri Mar 27, 2009 9:06 am Post subject: Chapter 2

Smee’s tower did not disappoint. It stood like a lighthouse, a bastion of hope in a sea of mist. The architecture was remarkable, it was hard to decide whether it was an engineers dream or nightmare. Magic played an important role in its construction.

The stone work was a solid blue and decorated with simple shapes of gold and white. The many edges and odd curves gave it a feeling of complexity and power. Ledges and balconies jutted out on every level without pattern. Windows of different sizes and intricacy glistened in the morning light. The tower had everything… except a door.

DMW walked in through the garden, the grass was lush and many different an exotic flowers grew all around. He was careful to watch his step and trod on flat rocks laid out in a horribly impractical manner. When he reached the face of the shining obelisk he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. Then all of a sudden booming voice accompanied by an emerald illusion of Smee’s face appear above him. It stared down with contempt.

“Who goes there!”

“Wow, I know you were a fan of the Wizard of Oz but come on!”

“Who goes there!”

“It’s Deady, you’re friendly neighbourhood zombie.”

“Ah! Please come in, one lump or two?”

“Erm… two I suppose.”

The gigantic green face turned into fine, sparkling dust which floated around for a moment before swirling around DeadManWalking. It created concentrated winds and gusts that began to lift him from the ground. He was then violently wafted higher and higher. He was well over one hundred feet off the ground before he reached the top. Then he was dumped unceremoniously on a flat, marble plateau.

A part of the flooring began to sink into a set of stairs and up hopped Smee. He was carefully balancing a tea tray in one hand, tucked two collapsible chairs under his arms and was struggling to drag up a table with his left foot.

“Deady!… My old friend!”

He continued struggling and panting. The only reason DMW didn’t offer to help was because he was marvelling at the slow yet successful progress he was making. After a few moments of tumbling and abject terror, (there were no walls or fences on the platform) Smee had set up a quaint little scene.

“Take a seat, please.”

DMW obliged and sat quietly until Smee had finished pouring his tea.

“Crumpet?”

“No, thanks.”

“I have jam or marmalade if you prefer?”

“No, that’s fine.”

“Are you sure, not even a scone?”

“No, really it’s-”

“Biscuit? Muffin? Hot cross bun?

“Smee! Really, it’s fine.”

“Apologies, I don’t get many visitors these days. I think I have a good idea why…”

“I’ll probably regret asking but why?”

“I think it’s due to extreme body odour.”

“But Smee… You don’t smell.”

“Not me fool! Them, they’re too embarrassed to be around my brilliance whilst smelling so horrible. The thing is, I’ve lost my sense of smell so I don’t really mind at all!”

“Wha-? Smee that’s…”

This time DMW did take the time to sigh. He just stared at Smee sipped on his tea. Nene might have been right. Maybe his mind wasn’t what it used to be.

“Listen Smee, I have a few questions for you.”

“I’m listening.”

Smee flicked out his wand and began toasting a few crumpets.

“What’s happened to the city Smee?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Look around you, look at this place. It’s a breath of what it was. The streets are littered with scum and half the people we knew have left or just vanished.”

“Well, that’s unfortunate. But what do you want me to do about it?”

“Nothing, I just want to know if you know anything about where and why Chinaren has up and left.”

“Chinaren’s gone?”

“You didn’t know?”

“No, this is the first time I’ve heard. Want a toasted crumpet?”

“Fine, I’ll have the crumpet…”

“Jam or marmalade?”

“Jam.”

“Strawberry or Raspberry?”

“Strawberry.”

“Seeds or seedless?”

“God damn it Smee!”

“What!?”

“Just give me the crumpet.”

Smee handed him the slightly burnt, spread free crumpet. He ate it dry, it was terrible. Being undead he didn’t have any functioning saliva glands. After he forced it down he finished the rest of his tea to wash it away.

“Anyway… woooooo…”

“That’ll be the tea, it’s my own special blend. Want more?”

“What’s in the tea Smee…”

“Nothing special, just some bits and bobs.”

“What’s in it?”

“I don’t actually know. I found it in my cupboard under a shoe box. I liked the package, it was black, green and had a big yellow cross on it.”

“Smee… just tell how I can get in contact with Chinaren…”

DMW reached for another crumpet.

“Hmm, I might need to think about that one. I know! This will tell us where he is right away.”

Smee reached into his many pocketed robe and pulled out a small metal scrying glass. He looked into its reflection and rubbed it a little. He tapped it twice with his wand and static appeared on it like an old television.

“Sorry, there’s no speakers. I didn’t get them installed.”

He put his lips close to the fuzzy images now flashing around and whispered something non-descript. Finally the images began to settle. When Smee turned it so DMW could see he wasn’t sure what he should think.

“Is it broke?”

“No, this is definitely the right picture.”

“Is it of an extreme close up of his pupil? Because all I see is black.”

“The only explanation is he’s out of range or somewhere very dark. This thing is international so unless he’s on mars…”

“I wouldn’t doubt it.”

“I’m sorry DMW, I can’t really help you much.”

“It’s fine I just-”

“Wait a sec! Someone’s trying to scale my tower!”

The White Blacksmith · Joined: 02 Apr 2006 Posts: 2629

Smee doesn't drink tea ,you know. He's very odd, but there you go.

Is the DP who is climbing the tower? If so, I'd say it is another Ifian, one who like to climb. Or maybe it's snore, who has lost his powers (for some reason) but is convinced that he can fly if he can just jump off somewhere high...

Smee · Joined: 16 Oct 2004 Posts: 5202 Location: UK

*giggles*

Nice, Gall, funny dialogue.

I never met him, but a fathairyape, despite the implied girth, might have the agility to climb my tower.

And whitey makes a good point about the tea, unless it was redbull flavoured!

Happy Writing :)

Gallant · Posted: Fri Mar 27, 2009 9:35 am Post subject:

Who says you were drinking the tea?

Smee · Joined: 16 Oct 2004 Posts: 5202 Location: UK

Quote: He just stared at Smee sipped on his tea.

Assuming you meant 'as' rather than 'at'... you did ;)

Guest · Posted: Fri Mar 27, 2009 10:24 am Post subject:

Very funny chapter. I liked it. :D A yellow cross? does that mean it is medication from a hospital, becuase I thought it was a red cross... :) Oh how about check out who the person is scaling up the tower with a rope and grappling hook.

Crunchyfrog · Joined: 12 Dec 2006 Posts: 3875

Haha, that was funny! Smee is completely out of his tree. :D

I think CNS is onto something with the green/black box with the yellow cross on it. Whether it is responsible for unhinging Smee, or he just can't remember what it was, we don't know. Good stuff. Adds to the intrigue.

Well, whoever it is climbing up the tower, Smee and DMW decide to go back down the steps into the heart of the tower (from where Smee emerged) and barricade themselves in. After all, strange things are afoot and they can't be too careful.

Then we can get to fully appreciate the abode of a deranged mage.

:)

DeadManWalking · Posted: Fri Mar 27, 2009 11:52 am Post subject:

If an undead has no working saliva glands, would it have working taste buds?

Besides that small point, pretty awesome!

But of course, i would've helped Smee. I'm VERY helpful!*

I think that the person scaling the tower should be the woman who was tailing our devilishly handsome main character earlier. Because, obviously she wouldn't have the benefits of the spell, she would have to climb to follow.

Plus, it would let us know who that person is when Smee and I ambush her.

*i.e. willing to get close enough to people to pick their pockets.

Alegria · Posted: Fri Mar 27, 2009 12:22 pm Post subject:

I suggest that it's some messenger from the malevolent entity that drove Smee nuts come to "check up" on Smee.

Good chapter!

Phantomfan · Posted: Fri Mar 27, 2009 1:22 pm Post subject:

What if it was an Apedog climbing the tower? Perhaps he smells some sort of bananas Banana spread for crumpets? Or the tea could exude a scent that attracts them....

Woot for crazy Smee!

The White Blacksmith · Joined: 02 Apr 2006 Posts: 2629

I think the green/black box is some kind of poison myself...

Lady of the Shadows · Posted: Sat Mar 28, 2009 2:31 pm Post subject:

Hmm. Intriguing, Gall.

Maybe the intruder is a new character, that people haven't seen, or someone who turned traitor. OR, maybe, a minion of somebody utterly, delightfully evil who had a hand in the chaos that struck the city.

But that's jst me rambling. :tung:

Gallant · Posted: Sun Mar 29, 2009 3:49 am Post subject:

I was waiting for someone to get it but obviously no one is. :P

Somebody please take a look at the jamaican flag on google images or something.

Alegria · Posted: Sun Mar 29, 2009 7:47 am Post subject:

Oh dear, Gallant...

Are you drinking hash tea? :P

Phantomfan · Posted: Sun Mar 29, 2009 9:11 am Post subject:

...huh.
If you hadn't of pointed it out Gall, I don't think any of us would have ever gotten it.

DeadManWalking · Posted: Sun Mar 29, 2009 10:11 am Post subject:

definitely not. A little obscure.

Novelest_Ninjagirl · Posted: Sun Mar 29, 2009 5:59 pm Post subject:

Wow Gall. Not often I see a chappy that's this much dialogue. (can't spell. ugh,. ) but you pulled it off well. I liked how it seemed dmw was barely restraining his patience.

as for the dp, I'm gonna go with dmw's idea. It should be that person who's been tailing dmw* I wanna find out who it is!
*Not devilishly handsome at all