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DukeReg
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 Posted: Sun Jun 04, 2006 5:01 am Post subject: Tempting Fate |
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This is the prologue to my first storygame. Happy reading and suggesting!
Tempting Fate: Prologue
"Thirteen!" announced the croupier, almost drowned out by the excited squeals of a tipsy young lady, who had just won back a large part of the money the house had taken from her since she entered.
She spun to the young man she had been clinging to in anticipation, and started a rapid-fire technical analysis of what had just happened:
"Oh my god, Jack! That was so amazing! How did you know it would be thirteen? You are so lucky! Oh my god! I can't believe we won! We won, Jack!"
"Jake," corrected the young man, wondering if his London accent was really that hard to understand. "Listen Roxy, will you hold on to my winnings? I'll get us some more drinks to celebrate."
With his most winning smile, Jake made his way towards the bar. Jake got the bartender's attention and was just about to order when he recognised the man sitting at the bar not a foot to the right of where he was standing. Jakes mouth worked, but no wisdom spilled forth. Finally he sat down hard on the stool next to the man. The bartender, seeing that Jake was indisposed, raised an eyebrow and moved away with a narrow glance at the two patrons.
The subject of Jake's dismayed attention was a rotund man, with a greying walrus moustache and deep-set grey eyes that overrode the visual impact of all his other features.
"H-how'd you find me?" Jake asked, unsteadily.
The man shook his head and sipped his drink before responding, with a thick Yorkshire accent.
"You know how it is, Summers. I happened to be in the country, a chance detour took me to this city, I was passing the casino by chance, and I came in on a whim. Thought I might as well lose a few dollars, maybe have a stiff drink. I guess you had the same idea... What a coincidence."
The last comment was heavy with irony.
Jake straightened his shoulders and took a deep, but shaky, breath. He could have ignored or palmed off most people without so much as an uneasy twinge, but the face of Henry Willace was not something to be ignored.
"So you came for me then?" It was a silly question, which Jake had asked a little bit too loudly.
Neither man noticed the bartender, who had been speaking on the phone, "casually" catch the eye of a member of casino security who had "casually" walked over to start ejecting anyone making trouble. A vaguely familiar man on the other side of Willace started looking around nervously.
Willace looked down at the bar and shook his head sadly.
"I tried to tell you how it worked, son, but you wouldn't see reason. None of us would need to touch a hair on your head, even if we meant you harm. Nor will we try to protect you. It wouldn't make any difference."
He drained his drink and put some money on the bar.
"I think I'll go back to my hotel. Choose your game carefully boy. At best you will break even. Fate hates a compulsive winner."
As Willace stood up and turned to go, a shot rang out, and he felt a brush on his sleeve. The source of the bullet that had just passed through where he had been sitting a moment before was obvious. Willace belatedly realised that he had recognised the person next to him not from a bad movie as he had suspected earlier, but from one of those America's Most Wanted shows playing in his hotel room.
The man had obviously lost his nerve with security standing behind him, and gone for his gun. The gun had then gone off while the man from security wrestled with him. Willace realised all this in a split second of detachment, as he saw Jake Summers, with a hole in the dead centre of his forehead, slump lifelessly to the ground. America's Most Wanted Man managed to elbow the security guard in the throat, and was levelling his gun for his 13th "alleged" kill, with his back toward Willace, when the stocky Englishman started moving.
With speed and power that defied the evidence of his waistline, Willace stepped forwards and grabbed the man from behind by his shoulder and wrist. He twisted hard, and yanked the man backwards and down, before casually driving his knee upwards through the falling man's straightening arm with a sickening crunch. The gun discharged one final time, and there was a cry of pain and redoubled screams from the casino goers.
By the time the entire security of the casino had gathered around, to explain to the excited crowd that 1 dead and 3 injured within the space of 5 seconds was in the category of "nothing to see", Willace was back at the bar, draining another drink.
---
The police car that dropped Willace off at his shabby little hotel must have been delighted. It wasn't going to have to spend the night without other emergency vehicles for company, since there was plenty of shiny red engines with stylish flashing lights to keep it entertained. Willace, in contrast, was not so happy that his hotel was on fire.
There was a crowd of people standing just outside the building, and fire-fighters bustling around. There were several worried faces, including one stout young lady who was going anxiously from person to person, probably asking after a loved-one staying at the hotel.
Willace looked solemnly at the key in his hand. It was labelled "Room 14". There was no room 13 in this hotel (due to some silly superstition, he suspected), and he had a feeling he knew exactly where the fire had started, and exactly whose posessions had been most completely destroyed.
Willace thanked the cops for the ride, and noticed that they were looking at him as though he was only being released because of a series of phone calls from obscurely important people with British accents. You'd have to look for years to find a coincidence like that.
Willace walked towards the grafitti-ridden multi-story parking lot across the street from the hotel. He wondered idly if his hire-car had been stolen, crashed into, had the tires slashed or merely been keyed tonight.
When he finally ascended several flights of stairs, climbing over at least 1 homeless man in the process, he found his car with no unsightly marks on it. He suspiciously got into the car and turned the ignition key. He tried vainly to start the car for a while, before finally getting out. He booted the car solidly in one of the tires, and rolled his eyes when the car alarm went off. He walked over to one of the support pillars, and leant upright against it, with his head resting on his arms.
Willace thought back over the night's events. He thought about Jake Summers, and where he had met the man, before Jake had even joined the Agency.
---
Ok my soon-to-be loyal readers, its up to you to suggest the situation where Summers and Willace met a few years ago. In keeping with the theme of the story, I want it to be an interesting coincidence. Coincidence is easy, its the interesting part that will make it fun for you.
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Last edited by DukeReg on Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:07 pm; edited 6 times in total
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Sun Jun 04, 2006 5:52 am Post subject: |
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Duke! Ya got a SGame AND and av! Intriguing start as well. Like it.
I have no immediate suggestions, but then I have been drinking cheap beer, so I am not in the most coherent state.
Anyhoo, I will be watching this one closely.
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Sun Jun 04, 2006 6:54 am Post subject: |
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Nice start DukeReg. Rather intriguing 
Now, given the overall theme of luck here, I think they should last have met in a road traffic accident. They were the only two left uninjured in a multi-car pileup. I would say that counts as severely coincidental.
I'll await the next installment with interest... 
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Sun Jun 04, 2006 3:38 pm Post subject: |
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Yeah, I decided I would finally get my act together, pretty up my boring image and start putting back into the community, ... reading more peoples storygames, starting my own, etc. Probably should have waited until after exams, but I only get the motivation to start something on rare occasions.
Anyway, I have a lot of cool scenes planned out and cant wait to work them in.
Good suggestions so far, I'll wait a lot longer to give people a chance to notice the thread.
| lordofthenight wrote: | | Maybe another casino, or some cheap dingy bar? |
The law of averages would be working with them on that one I think! 
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DarkeFlyte
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| Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2006 12:11 pm Post subject: |
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Crashes, awesome! 
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The Powers That Be
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| Posted: Mon Jun 05, 2006 12:20 pm Post subject: |
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Separate traffic accidents. Willace's car hit, and killed, the bookie who was out looking for Summers, and vice versa (you can substitute freely for 'bookie'). Willace and Summers suffered identical (minor) injuries and met each other in the hospital room they ended up sharing.
Coincidental (and lucky) enough?
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Tue Jun 06, 2006 7:47 pm Post subject: |
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All of the suggestions have been good so far, and I'm going to have much fun writing it no matter which one wins.
I've asked lordofthenight to put the poll up. The options will be:
- Only ones uninjured when involved in a massive traffic accident.
- Unlikely things happen when they meet in a casino or dingy bar.
- Kill each other's rivals in unrelated accidents and meet in hospital.
Choose wisely...
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Ravagerrr
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| Posted: Wed Jun 07, 2006 5:26 pm Post subject: |
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| In thanks for your involvement in Pillbox, I thought I'd poke my nose in here for a read. I found the story amusing, but terribly confusing when bullets began flying... I wasn't sure who was killing who etc... was this just supposed to be a random killing that just happened to target Jake in the process of this strange meeting of old rivals? I wasn't sure what to make of the situation. But, otherwise, I think this was a good start...
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Wed Jun 07, 2006 8:55 pm Post subject: |
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The more the merrier!
Just to clarify: Jake was never targeted by anyone.
Willace had no interest in fighting with or killing him, although Jake seemed to think that he might.
The wanted man got spooked by the guy from casino security, who had come over because the bartender had reported 2 suspicious British guys, who sounded like they could start killing each other at any moment. The wanted man thought security would recognise him up this close and panicked. He was holding the gun, and the casino security man was trying to take it from him. It went off, and hit Jake between the eyes.
I can see how that scene could be confusing. I was trying to shatter peoples expectations of cause and effect and what a reasonable coincidence is, because the story is based on abnormal luck and... well... tempting fate.
Keep reading, I hope to have much more confusing and unlikely action in the next chapter!
It looks like poll option 3 will win. I'll ask lordofthenight to take it down tomorrow, in case any stragglers want to vote.
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Geek_girl72
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| Posted: Wed Jun 07, 2006 9:14 pm Post subject: |
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Wow, neat story. It's coherently confusing, I like it!
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Ravagerrr
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| Posted: Thu Jun 08, 2006 7:17 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks for the explanation. I don't think its necessary to eliminate details to create an element of surprise. From my understanding of your work here, surprise is what you're going for as opposed to confusion. Its hard to be surprised when you are completely confused because you lack the details to know what's going on.
Now, that said, there is good confusion and bad confusion.
Good confusion is like having a jig-saw puzzle layed out before you. You can clearly see each piece, but putting them together is the tough part.
Bad confusion is like trying to put a jig-saw puzzle together without being able to see the pieces. You give up trying to solve the puzzle because you can't make heads nor tails of it.
Maybe that makes sense... maybe it doesn't... are you confused yet? lol...
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Thu Jun 08, 2006 8:37 pm Post subject: |
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 Shame on you! Only I may create confusion in my thread! j/k
Seriously Rav, I don't try to make it confusing. However I would rather make people think and risk them getting confused, than have the story made boring because the plot is stated in short, simple sentences.
If something is truly confusing, I am more than happy to explain it to anyone who asks. I try to iron this kind of thing out before posting but don't always succeed. Such is life.
Peace. 
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Fri Jun 09, 2006 6:44 am Post subject: |
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Ok, poll is closed and I have written most of the next chapter. It should be up within a day or so.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Fri Jun 09, 2006 9:43 pm Post subject: |
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"Kill each other's rivals in unrelated accidents and meet in hospital" won the first poll.
Tempting Fate: Chapter 1
It was a cold winter, which was not as unlikely as it sounds, and the ice on the roads made driving even more dangerous than usual. This observation seemed well worth wasting a thought on, in one of Willace's very familiar moments of detachment, which he liked to call "inanity checks".
Willace's mind came back to the present as he gave a final heave to pull the woman fully out of the ice-cold water. He collapsed on the river bank then and tried to catch his breath. His breath was exhausted too, so he caught it pretty quickly. He turned and knelt by the woman, prepared to give first-aid if necessary, but it was too late. The woman had probably been dead before he had managed to drag her out of her mangled car.
Willace sighed and sat back on his heels. If only he or the woman hadn't been going so fast, there would have been no crash. He knew he had wanted to leave the area because it contained people with guns who didn't much like him, but the woman surely had no such excuse. Why had she been driving like such a maniac, over a death-trap like the old Elm Street Bridge?
He noticed something hanging half out of one of the woman's coat pockets. It looked like an envelope. Willace struggled with himself. After a moment, curiosity got the better of it's-none-of-my-business and get-inside-somewhere-and-warm-up. As Willace pulled the envelope out, a heavy object slid out of the coat pocket onto the ground.
Willace's curiosity now got the opportunity for a 3rd round, this time against an upcoming champion, avoid-hanging-around-people-who-died-carrying-a-gun-for-no-apparent-reason. Curiosity won in a controversial call and he opened the envelope. It contained a series of torn and crumpled photographs featuring a passionate embrace between a handsome young man and a ravishing young woman. There was also a waterlogged, handwritten note, with barely legible writing, saying "Pay-back at the pub on Elm St, 3pm Tueday. H.".
Willace had found over the years that the most dramatic and cliche situations were the one's that the average idiot invested the most effort into achieving. He had a feeling he knew where this woman was going, and why she had the gun. He really didn't care to find out if he was right.
Willace heaved himself to his feet. His aching muscles seemed to do little more than add mass to his already substantial bulk. Willace started feeling light headed. He looked down and noticed that he was bleeding. He felt himself starting to feel... what's the word... feel...
---
Willace didn't feel at all confused when he woke up in a hospital bed some time later. He was nothing if not calm and level-headed. He looked around, to see some nurses fussing over a handsome young man in the next bed. The man seemed drawn and distracted. He seemed somehow familiar.
"I know its a shock, Mr Summers, but just rest a while. The nice police lady will be in soon to ask you what happened."
She noticed Willace awake and walked over to check on him.
"You will be ok too, Mr Willace. Isn't it lucky you two were hurt less than a block from each other? The Ambulance only had to make one trip."
Willace winced involuntarily, and the nurse mistook his reaction to the word "lucky" for physical pain.
"Just lie still. The doctor will see you soon. Ah, the police were hoping they could have a word with you about some things they found-"
Willace smiled. "Thank you. I really appreciate it."
Her patient's sudden polite firmness, and confusion over what she was being thanked for, made the nurse accept the dismissal without hurt feelings or argument and walk away.
A few hours later, there was no noise but the sounds of a hospital at night time. Willace lay there, unable to sleep. This was mainly because Jake Summers, also unable to sleep, kept trying to keep him company. He needed someone to talk to, and Willace was the only candidate.
"So where are you from, Willace?"
Willace just groaned.
"Sorry?"
"Yorkshire."
"Any particular part?"
"Nope."
"Well, I'm from Islington."
"I don't care."
"There's no reason to be rude."
"There's no reason to keep me awake."
"Aren't you even the least bit worried that we nearly died today?"
"Summers, 'nearly' is just a fancy word for 'didn't'. You have bigger things to worry about than what's already happened."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean everyone has problems with their life that need to be solved in the future, and if you spend all your time worrying about the past, the future will jog by and change its name to 'past' before you get a chance to deal with it in the present."
There was a silence for a while. Either Jake had to reboot from overheating, or he was thinking about what had been said.
Finally Jake started speaking again.
"It's really the future that worries me. The man... the man who I threw in front of that van today was trying to kill me, right? And I didn't want to hurt him, but he was angry about... well he was angry anyway, and I think they're going to throw the book at me. And its not just the one bloke, it was whoever was in that van. It wouldn't have swerved and crashed into that tree if it wasn't for me, and-"
"Elm tree, right?"
"What? Um... yeah it was actually."
"And the van was a black one with tinted windows."
"Yeah. I guess you would have heard about it. Hell, you would have heard when it caught fire and exploded! What are the chances of that happening in a modern vehicle?"
There was a silence that probably kept its job by staring down all the impending sounds in the area.
"Well, anyway, after all that, all I'm worried about is what my wife is going to think when she finds out... well... ok... I got friendly with the wife of my wife's best friend. I didn't mean for anything to happen with her. It was just a stupid fling that I regretted as soon as it happened, but-"
"Oh god. I know you now."
"What? Oh never mind. Look I'm sorry I kept you awake. I'll-"
"No I mean I know where I've seen you before. Just listen. I have something to tell you... and I warn you, this may hurt... a lot."
---
The next morning, they were both released from hospital. The police had talked to them both, and wanted to hear from Jake again soon. After making a phone call, Willace was told with some appraising looks that he wouldn't need to help with any Police enquiries.
Jake looked haunted, and his eyes were red from weeping. Willace felt a pang of sympathy.
"You really loved her dearly, didn't you Jake?"
Jake just looked at him, staring like a man with nothing left to live for.
"I used to be so lucky." he said, vacantly. "Everything I touched turned to gold. I once won roulette twice in a row, and then met my wife at the bar. Best day of my life. Now... I don't know what to do."
"Do you believe in fate, Jake?"
"What, you think this is some kind of pay back? Karma? Why would fate choose to kill her and leave me alive?"
"Maybe because you can't suffer if you are dead."
"What? I was being sarcastic. I-"
"I know, so was I."
"What are you getting at?"
"I think fate brought us together, Summers. Forget all that hippy karma crap. I'm talking about a real coincidence that can change your life for good. Last night and today, you told me enough for me to know something about you. I have it too. You may not realise it, but there is worse to come. Fate keeps a tab, Summers. Someone has to pay the bill. You have to learn to take control, or you're as good as dead."
"You want to teach me to control luck? And what the hell do you mean I'm as good as dead? Look, I've had enough of this crap."
Jake turned and started walking off.
Willace grabbed his arm. Jake had never been clamped to an earnest walrus before, but he thought this was what it would be like. He struggled vainly to shake off the vice-like grip. Willace eventually let go and spoke, in a blunt tone.
"I offered to help you take control of your life, not take control of fate. Noone can cheat fate. Look, just take my card. I am offering you a job; something that can give your life new meaning, let your luck mean something other than a good run at the casino. Come and see me when you are ready to talk."
Jake took the proffered card. He started walking again, turning only once to see Willace get sprayed by a passing car.
When he was in a taxi, on his way home, Jake looked at the card that he had been given. All it said was "Willace, Henry. ID 0013". Jake looked in his wallet. He noticed that he had just enough money for some very strong liquor. That couldn't be a coincidence. Jake tucked the card into his wallet and forgot about it until many months later. Right now he had a new mission for the taxi driver.
---
Jake's breath rasped in his throat and his lungs felt like they would tear apart at any moment. He suspected that his lungs' future would involve just that, if Jermija's thugs caught up with him. Luckily the men weren't quite brash enough to shoot him while running down a public street, even in an area like this at nighttime.
Jake ducked into an alley, and then found, like many pursued men before him, that some alleys are dead ends. He suspected that the Russian loan-shark didn't hire people too stupid to check a nearby alley when their quarry abruptly disappeared a moment before, which added insult to likely injury.
Jake looked around. There was at least 2 doors facing onto the alley. The building on one side was derelict, and had an unboarded broken window at ground level. There was a pile of rubbish nearby, and a 10ft gate topped with barbed wire that blocked the back way into a car wrecker's yard. There was a miserable looking drainpipe right next to the fence that might help him climb over, but the barbed wire and the barking of large-sounding dogs from that direction put Jake off.
Jake pulled out his wallet and wondered if he could convince them to give him another few days by paying them everything he had on him. Then he could leave town and change his name. They'd probably be on the lookout for that though. He still had 50 pounds of emergency money stashed away at home. He could use it over a few days to win back what he owed at a game somewhere. His luck had to come back soon! He couldn't keep losing like this.
Jake winced as his plans were foiled by finding nothing but a 5 pound note there. He pulled it out and gave it a pleading look. Maybe it would take pity on him, and grow in denomination, maybe even invite some of its friends to help him out. The money remained indifferent to his plight, and Jake threw his wallet to the ground in frustration. Something slid out of it.
Jake picked up the business card and looked at it in the faint glow from the flickering street light at the end of the alley. He might as well find out who this forgotten contact was before he died. As he read the name and number on the card, memory of the man he had met months ago came flooding back.
Willace would have made Jake nervous with his intensity and air of brooding certainty, had Jake not had other things on his mind at the time. Now all Jake could think about was what Willace had said, about his luck getting worse, about fate and how Willace could give his life meaning. On a sudden whim, Jake pocketed the card and decided that if he survived the night, he would find Willace somehow and find out more about his offer. His life couldn't get any worse.
The sounds of footsteps and harsh voices just outside the alley brought Jake's imminent demise in said alley back to his attention, and he tried to figure out what he should do to escape. He realised morosely that whatever he decided to try, the only thing that would allow him to pull it off would be sheer luck.
---
How should he try to escape, and what stroke of luck will allow him to pull it off?
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Duke Reg
Completed SGs:
Tempting Fate
Last edited by DukeReg on Sun Jun 11, 2006 6:55 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Sat Jun 10, 2006 2:20 am Post subject: |
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Good chapter. The hospital conversation was a tad confusing, especially the wife of the wife of the best friend. That one made my eyes spin a little, but I got there in the end.
I like the progression, though. You've got me curious about what this Willace will teach Jake, when they finally get together again.
Okay, how will he get out of this? I suggest he goes into the derelict and tries to keep out of sight. Of course, the thug will run after him, but... well... the floor is weak and it barely held for Jake as he ran across it. This well-muscled heavyweight won't stand a chance. The floor will give, he'll either plunge into the cellar or be trapped by a splintered floorboard.
Of course, his gun will go skittering out of his reach. Lucky, huh?
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Smee
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| Posted: Sat Jun 10, 2006 4:03 am Post subject: |
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Ooh - a promoted new storygame.
I'll be catching up very soon Duke
Happy Writing
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Sat Jun 10, 2006 5:48 am Post subject: |
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Nice idea Stoat.
You seem to have read the situation as being a single thug chasing Jake. There is actually more than one, so something that stops a single person may not stop them all. Your suggestion could easily work still, but I thought I'd clear up the misunderstanding early.
As for the dialogue, I was trying to show that Jake and Willace aren't on the same conversational frequency. The conversations were awkward and didn't flow very eloquently in the story world, and I was trying to reflect that.
I'll try to make it easier to read as I go on.
Here's a question of storygame etiquette: Is it rude to significantly change the chapter once people have read it?
Apart from unclear conversations, there's another problem:
I tried to be clever by having Willace see the hand of fate in the fact that the van crashed into an Elm tree, on Elm street. I realised just a moment ago that the street was probably called Elm because of all the Elms on it, so any fool would be able to assume that the tree involved in the accident was an Elm. So much for uncanny coincidence!
I could fix this brain-slip on my part by adding a small section or a few comments that there was only two Elm trees left on the entire street, or it was a poorly named street, or something like that.
I think this would improve the story slightly for future readers, but I have already posted the chapter and a few of you have read it already. Is this kind of afterwards tweaking frowned upon?
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Ravenwing
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| Posted: Sat Jun 10, 2006 7:39 pm Post subject: |
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I thought that was actually quite funny. Don't bother changing that, DReg.
I was thinking that maybe there is a hole in the barb wire that can allow the dogs to come through. The thugs following Jake smell like burgers or something, tempting the dogs to chase after them.
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Sat Jun 10, 2006 7:55 pm Post subject: |
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Well done Duke! I think this must be the first promoted story!
How about the intervention of a third party? Maybe the nurse? We haven't had many other characters in yet.
I think the chapter is great except:
Some spaces needed between some paragraphs still.
and...
There are a couple of random lines of humor here and there, and I don't think they fit well in the story.
Other than that... This is on my READ list!
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Sun Jun 11, 2006 12:57 am Post subject: |
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| chinaren wrote: |
I think the chapter is great except:
Some spaces needed between some paragraphs still.
and...
There are a couple of random lines of humor here and there, and I don't think they fit well in the story.
|
I'm always open to advice. Can you specify which paragraphs and which jokes you don't like? I read through it and don't know what parts you are talking about.
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Sun Jun 11, 2006 4:21 am Post subject: |
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Damn you for making me think when I am drunk..
| Quote: | | His breath was exhausted too, so he caught it pretty quickly. |
I thought was humor, though I could be wrong of course!
| Quote: | "I know its a shock, Mr Summers, but just rest a while. The nice police lady will be in soon to ask you what happened."
She noticed Willace awake and walked over to check on him.
"You will be ok too, Mr Willace. Isn't it lucky you two were hurt less than a block from each other? The Ambulance only had to make one trip."
Willace winced involuntarily, and the nurse mistook his reaction to the word "lucky" for physical pain.
"Just lie still. The doctor will see you soon. Ah, the police were hoping they could have a word with you about some things they found-"
Willace smiled. "Thank you. I really appreciate it."
Her patient's sudden polite firmness, and confusion over what she was being thanked for, made the nurse accept the dismissal without hurt feelings or argument and walk away.
A few hours later, there was no noise but the sounds of a hospital at night time. Willace lay there, unable to sleep. This was mainly because Jake Summers, also unable to sleep, kept trying to keep him company. He needed someone to talk to, and Willace was the only candidate.
"So where are you from, Willace?"
Willace just groaned.
"Sorry?"
"Yorkshire."
"Any particular part?"
"Nope."
"Well, I'm from Islington."
"I don't care."
"There's no reason to be rude."
"There's no reason to keep me awake."
"Aren't you even the least bit worried that we nearly died today?"
"Summers, 'nearly' is just a fancy word for 'didn't'. You have bigger things to worry about than what's already happened."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean everyone has problems with their life that need to be solved in the future, and if you spend all your time worrying about the past, the future will jog by and change its name to 'past' before you get a chance to deal with it in the present."
There was a silence for a while. Either Jake had to reboot from overheating, or he was thinking about what had been said.
Finally Jake started speaking again.
"It's really the future that worries me. The man... the man who I threw in front of that van today was trying to kill me, right? And I didn't want to hurt him, but he was angry about... well he was angry anyway, and I think they're going to throw the book at me. And its not just the one bloke, it was whoever was in that van. It wouldn't have swerved and crashed into that tree if it wasn't for me, and-"
"Elm tree, right?"
"What? Um... yeah it was actually."
"And the van was a black one with tinted windows."
"Yeah. I guess you would have heard about it. Hell, you would have heard when it caught fire and exploded! What are the chances of that happening in a modern vehicle?"
There was a silence that probably kept its job by staring down all the impending sounds in the area.
"Well, anyway, after all that, all I'm worried about is what my wife is going to think when she finds out... well... ok... I got friendly with the wife of my wife's best friend. I didn't mean for anything to happen with her. It was just a stupid fling that I regretted as soon as it happened, but-"
"Oh god. I know you now."
"What? Oh never mind. Look I'm sorry I kept you awake. I'll-"
"No I mean I know where I've seen you before. Just listen. I have something to tell you... and I warn you, this may hurt... a lot." |
...needs some spaces!
Sorry, I will come back to this when I can see straight.
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Mother Goose
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| Posted: Sun Jun 11, 2006 6:12 pm Post subject: |
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| I laughed at the line about his breath being exhausted too, so he caught it quickly.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Sun Jun 11, 2006 6:53 pm Post subject: |
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Yeah that was a deliberate joke. Most of the jokes are deliberate; its supposed to be an amusing story.
I have trouble with putting blank lines in the middle of dialogue. It seems to imply a pause in conversation that isn't there. There are places where I can space it out though. I'll do that now; tell me what you think.
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Sun Jun 11, 2006 7:41 pm Post subject: |
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| DukeReg wrote: | Yeah that was a deliberate joke. Most of the jokes are deliberate; its supposed to be an amusing story.
. |
Mmm, intersting! I think it works better as 'suspence/thriller' actually. Just my opinion of course! Maybe I had better read it again.
>>Goes off to do that.<<
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The Powers That Be
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| Posted: Sun Jun 11, 2006 8:09 pm Post subject: |
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I thought the jokes were funny, but I agree with Chinaren that the story lacks a consistent tone.
Apart from that, I was confused by this chapter on first reading. I'll try again later.
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| Posted: Mon Jun 12, 2006 12:24 pm Post subject: |
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Well if its meant to be a suspense, I wouldn't expect the storyline to be easy to understand early one. I hope that all the questions I have will be answered in later chapters.
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| Posted: Mon Jun 12, 2006 7:31 pm Post subject: |
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I hope so too.
Unfortunately I have my fingers in way too many pies at the moment. The next chapter wont be up for about a week and a half while I try not to fail all of my 7th semester Uni exams. Keep the suggestions coming though, I'll still be active on the forum.
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| Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 1:14 am Post subject: |
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A most intriguing start Duke. Very different.
Usually I would say that Decision Points where we are choose the plot rather than the character's reaction to the plot aren't so good. But here I think it really works. Choosing how luck intervenes to save him... hmmmm...
How about one thug slips on some dog muck in the alley, his gun/weapon skitters to Jake, whilst another thug trips over the first one and falls down a open manhole that Jake has somehow avoided. Jake, now with a gun, fires without thought and luckily shoots the hand of a third thug making him drop his weapon. The bullet passes through the hand, ricocheting just enough on a bit of bone to hit the fourth thug in the head.
If there are more than 4 then he will need to consider the drainpipe to get over the fence - he can take his chances against the dogs with a gun in hand.
Good stuff Duke,
Happy Writing
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Ravenwing
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| Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 5:04 pm Post subject: |
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The number of thugs chasing after him is certainly a big factor in this DP I think. What I suggested probably considers 2 or 3 thugs.
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| Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 5:33 pm Post subject: |
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And that is definitely plain luck. LOL. Matches the plot very well.
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| Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 6:09 pm Post subject: |
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I like all these ideas.
The thing that attracted me to the luck theme in the first place was that anything can happen, it just usually doesn't. Once you start playing the universe with weighted dice, anything, no matter how unlikely or absurd in a different setting, is fair game.
| Smee wrote: | | Usually I would say that Decision Points where we are choose the plot rather than the character's reaction to the plot aren't so good. But here I think it really works. Choosing how luck intervenes to save him... hmmmm... |
Well this story is in the right place then; it has Humour, Miscellaneous, and Experimental elements.
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| Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 7:02 pm Post subject: |
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Exams are over, and the poll is up.
Vote away!
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| Posted: Sat Jun 24, 2006 4:21 am Post subject: |
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Polling for 2 days and only 1 vote? Come on guys!
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Sun Jun 25, 2006 9:13 pm Post subject: |
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Sorry, been away.
I voted for the third party. Maybe the nurse? Or how about a childhood friend who happens to be a powerful mob leader these days?
Mmm.
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| Posted: Sun Jun 25, 2006 9:19 pm Post subject: |
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Went with the dogs.
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| Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 4:53 am Post subject: |
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I was going to take it down just now, but it's tied. I'll wait a bit longer in case someone else comes in and votes, before choosing where to put my tie-breaking author vote.
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| Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 6:17 am Post subject: |
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I broke the tie, DReg. So start ur writing.
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| Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 6:39 am Post subject: |
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| I'm partial to the concept of "dumb luck"
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| Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 7:29 pm Post subject: |
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Poll is closed. I'll start writing the next chapter.
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| Posted: Fri Jun 30, 2006 10:30 pm Post subject: |
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It took a while to get this written because it's a bit longer than the first 2 instalments. At the rate I was going, the story was going to take too many chapters for anything to happen, so I decided to put a bit more in this time.
You have chosen for Jake to stay in the alley, while dogs come out and attack the thugs.
Tempting Fate: Chapter 2
Jake looked around indecisively. He didn't have time to think this through! He considered climbing the fence, but he could hear the dogs coming steadily closer, sounding bigger and meaner as they neared where the fence met the alley.
Jake faced the thugs, who had slowed to a smug walk as they entered the alley and saw that he was trapped. Jake decided right then and there that he would meet his fate with dignity. He squared his shoulders and stood in the middle of the alley, facing the men.
There was a loud crash from the direction of the rubbish heap, and Jake screamed and stumbled around to face the huge, slavering canines that had burst through a gap in the fence, concealed no more by the pile of crates and rubbish that had covered it before. One of the 5 huge dogs bowled Jake off his feet, and he lay flailing around, trying to get it off him. No doubt embarrassed at Jakes display, and figuring he had enough problems already, the dog spared him merely a growl as it ran off to latch onto the leg of a thug that was shooting wildly into the approaching animals.
Jake shakily got to his feet and looked around frantically. He decided not to go through the fence, into the domain of someone crazy enough to keep that many huge vicious dogs. Instead, his mind putting the whole scene into surreal slow motion, Jake edged his way past the brawl between the wild, vicious, hairy creatures and their four-pawed, canine assailants.
Jake made it out of the alley, and started jogging back the way he had originally come. He heard some final shots and the last dog gave a final yelp of pain, just as he dived into a ditch and lay still.
Half an hour later, stiff and cramped from the cold and damp, Jake was finally satisfied that the men were gone. He had been thinking of how he would find Willace, but he was tired of such serious thoughts. He didn't know why, but he was feeling strangely elated after surviving certain death.
---
Jake walked through the side door of a pub, giggling in a very macho manner. He was still on a nervous high from his near escape earlier. He noticed the stern look being directed at him by a bouncer. Jake walked up face to face with the man and looked solemnly into his eyes.
"I'm Henry Willace." Jake mocked, in a particularly bad yorkshire accent, "I will bring back your luck! Well ok, I can't do that but I will give your life meaning! It's a pity I can't be found, because I haven't given you any contact details!"
The bouncer looked at him critically. "Look, I don't care who you are, but you better not start no trouble, right?"
Jake just smiled at him and walked on. He didn't feel quite right. Being tipsy without drinking anything just wasn't natural. He came to the comforting conclusion that becoming royally, staggeringly drunk would fix this tear in the fabric of his universe. He just hoped that he could start a tab when his five quid ran out.
On a whim, Jake stopped at a poker machine he was passing. He put a coin, that he noticed on the floor, in the slot, and pressed the button. Not really expecting anything, he just stood and stared as the machine congratulated him on his win and poured coins into the tray. Slowly a smile formed on his face.
"Damn, Henry, you are lucky tonight." Jake quipped to himself, as he gathered his winnings and headed towards the bar.
---
Jake woke up to a world of pain and piercing bright light. He lay holding his head for about half an hour, before finally dragging himself out of bed. Little did he know that his morning would play out like a computer game mystery.
For a start, Jake was in an familiar yet unfamiliar setting. He was in what appeared to be a generic but fancy hotel room. Jake had very little idea of how he had got here, apart from some scetchy memories of his own history.
Jake looked in the bathroom mirror and noticed smudges of what looked like silver paint on his upper lip. He walked from place to place, examining other obvious clues, like the trenchcoat that was lying on the ground, and a hasty note from "Kate Bush " thanking "Henry Willace" for a great night, and saying to call her some time on a certain number.
At times, Jake would have flashbacks; memories of speaking in a bad accent as he won against all the odds at some of his favourite casinos, or giving people a hundred pounds to carry another hundred pounds to "that pretty lady" or "that man with the funny hat".
By the time he had had breakfast, Jake was chuckling at how well he had done in the "I am Henry Willace!" game. He had found his wallet and given a double take at how much money was in it. It was literally bulging with hundreds.
Jake had no idea how he had any money left in the state he had been in, but this meant he could pay back that crazy Russian, Jermija. Hopefully 10% interest would slake his blood lust, if Jake was eloquent enough.
---
Willace stepped out of his front door and snatched the morning paper from it's whistling flight towards his head. The paper boy rode on, his eyes focused straight ahead, with the stiff look of someone who was avoiding being scolded by a large walrus-man, through the clever ruse of not acknowledging that anything had happened.
Willace turned around, and was about to re-enter his run-down terrace house when he heard his name. Looking around, Willace listened for a moment to the conversation between 2 passing young women, who looked like they were just coming home after a big night out.
"He was obviously imitating some movie star or something, but I didn't know who Henry Willace was. I had a look through his wallet..."
"Katie!"
"Annie! I didn't steal anything! What do you take me for? Anyway his real name is Jacob Summers, and he's really handsome, and he seemed really nice. He made me laugh. The hurt look he gave me when I told him to take off the moustache and quit the bad northern accent just made it funnier. I really hope he calls me."
"Wow, this is so exciting! You've been single for too long! So what was it like staying at Claridge's? That place is so expensive! And why did he insist on a room with 13 in the number? It sounds a bit..."
Henry looked at his wristwatch. It was 6:30am. He should have time to find out what was going on before his appointment.
---
"Hello, my name is Henry Willace. I'd like to speak to a guest of yours named Henry Willace. I'm not sure of the room number, but it will have a 13 in it. It is a business matter."
Willace looked at his watch and then started tapping his fingers gently on the counter.
Without missing a beat, the receptionist typed the details into a computer terminal, before saying:
"Room 613, sir. I'll just call and tell him that..."
"That Jake Summers is here to see him. That should keep him guessing."
"... Ok, Mr Summers? Please wait a moment while I call him."
The doors of the elevator opened, and Jake stepped out. He was just walking over to sign out of his room, when he noticed Willace. He paused, before continuing over. Willace saw him and nodded. Just as Willace opened his mouth to tell the receptionist not to worry, a man who was 7 feet tall if an inch put a heavy hand on his shoulder.
"So you are Jake Summers." said the man in a menacing Russian accent. "Jermija said someone saw you here. Now I wouldn't want to cause a scene in a nice place like this. I'd like you to come with me, and show you what happens when you don't pay your debts."
Willace replied casually, without so much as looking at the man:
"And I'd like to eat candy and shit diamonds. The difference is I'm going to get half of what I want."
He smiled at the receptionist.
"Thank you, I won't need you to make that call. My associate is here. Come along Mr Summers."
With that Willace casually turned his ample body and stepped under the arm of the huge man, who stumbled, momentarily taken back by the ease with which Willace had walked away from him. As Jake nervously followed, the large man took several large strides and grabbed Jake and Willace by one shoulder each, and gripped hard.
"I don't know which of you is Jake Summers, but I'm going to find out. If you aren't him, and you want to avoid a lot of pain, you leave now. If you are... well its a bit late for you but you can save your friend the trouble. Now who is it then?"
---
Jake broke into a half-jog as he looked back at the large doors of the hotel.
"You are a psychopath. You should have stalled and let hotel security or the police deal with him, instead of..."
"No, you should have spent half an hour letting security and the police deal with him. I should be on my way to a meeting! Now quickly, why have you been using my name? I don't want to have every tough from every gang in town knocking on my door looking for Jake Summers a.k.a. Henry Willace."
Jake winced.
"It was just last night I swear. I was looking for you to take you up on your offer, but your card didn't have contact details. It started as a joke, and then I got carried away as my luck came back. By the way, I don't know how you found me or what you wanted to talk to me about, but I'm not interested any more. If I have my luck back, everything is ok."
"You aren't interested because your luck came back? And you don't think that you will have another bad run, worse than before? I'm not going to force you, but if you don't come with me now, I don't expect I'll see you again until I trip over your corpse one night."
Willace stopped by a parked car and turned to Jake, as an Ambulance, sirens blaring, sped past them towards the hotel entrance. Police sirens could be heard in the distance too.
Jake hesitated, but decided that a ride with Willace was better than a ride in a Police car. He got into the car and buckled his seatbelt.
"That's what I don't understand about you Willace! You obviously believe in luck, and yet you morbidly assume that everything will go wrong for me."
Willace started the engine and pulled away from the kerb.
"There's good luck and bad luck, Summers. I can see you've had good luck recently, but the bad luck... it's just waiting for the worst possible time to kick you in the teeth."
"Hang on, hang on... you said months ago that you couldn't change my luck, but you could give my life meaning until bad luck got the best of me. But now you're doing a one-eighty on me and saying that going with you will keep me safe from bad luck!"
Willace pursed his lips.
"I may have mislead you. Why does a casino win, Summers, even in games where the odds are close enough to even to make no difference?"
"It's because people always let it go to their head, and don't cut their losses when their winning streak ends. Except for the few people who are level headed enough to become professional gamblers."
Willace snorted.
"You are part right. Professional gamblers win because they cheat. Otherwise you are correct, normal people lose because no matter how big their winning streak is, they will keep playing, and eventually lose it all again. It doesn't work the other way around though.
"If they get a losing streak, and run out of money, its game over. No chance of getting it back. The ebb and flow of luck always terminates suddenly somewhere in the negative, when you run out of resources to deal with the bad run. That's exactly how your luck will suddenly stop; when you die during a losing streak. You can't afford to let it get out of hand like that again.
"If you come with me, we will teach you to manage situations and risks. We will teach you to constantly give fate the opportunity to have something bad happen to you. That way when you give it an opportunity to have something really lucky happen in your favour, it will flow more easily."
Jake sat, with knitted eyebrows, as he digested this.
"So what is the catch? This won't be a free service."
"Of course not. I can't give you too much information, but I can tell you two things. One, you will be under a military chain of command. You are told to do something, you do it, or your life, or at least liberty, are forfeit. Two, you will be part of a team whose motto is "Better lucky than good", and your assignments will reflect this. Are you in or out? You have three city blocks to decide."
Jake looked at him suspiciously.
"It seems weird that you are coming to me, asking me to join, rather than the other way around."
"We've learnt the hard way not to be obtuse when fate brings us new members. If it has to chase us down and force recruits or other lucky events down our throats, it usually brings some very bad times with it."
"I don't fully understand."
"You'd be an idiot if you thought you did."
Jake took a beep breath, as he made his decision.
"Ok. If fate wants me here, and since I have nothing really to lose, I'm in."
"That's good. I'll introduce you to some people who I just happen to be late for an important meeting with, and who just happen to be the same people who will be explaining everything to you."
Willace pulled the car over, and parked it. He paused in taking off his seatbelt and looked at Jake, who seemed uneasy.
"Look Summers, despite what I said before, you will have the chance to walk away before fully committing yourself. We don't want resentful, half-arsed people on the team. If you are one of us, it will be because we know you are good enough to handle it, and because you choose to be part of it."
"Thanks."
---
Jake's heart was pounding as he entered the building. He was introduced to several hard, dangerous looking men, and a pretty middle-aged woman who seemed to make the men wish they were somewhere else.
Jake soon realised why, as the woman, Ms Susan Rawson, led the interview. To her left sat a man named Robert Parker, who would no doubt have been very handsome, before he developed the disfiguring scar and cold, dangerous stare. To Rawson's right sat Willace, who seemed friendly and familiar in comparison to the others. There were a couple of other men there as well, but Jake wasn't introduced to them. They seemed to be serving in a secretarial capacity at the moment.
It felt like the hours of interviewing went on for days. With a cutting tongue and unwavering stare, Rawson questioned Jakes activities, from childhood to the present. She ordered the men to check out things he had said, and then looked at him to see if he would object. She gave descriptions of the particular special force he was to be part of, watching closely to see if he didn't respond well to any particular part of it.
After a brief lunch adjournment, in which Jake wasn't offered anything to eat, Rawson asked why he had been discharged from the army years before, insinuating as heavily as possible that it was because of some shortcomings on his part. She ordered the men to take detailed notes of his experiences with luck and circumstance, snorting in contempt when he told of how he had gotten into gambling debt while waiting for his luck to come back. Overall, she went out of her way to make him uncomfortable.
At the end of it all, Jake felt like he had been put through a full spin cycle, and left to dry in the sun. But he was in. They had accepted him. He was given training times and contact details and orders regarding secrecy, and then Willace offered him a lift home.
---
Jake got out of the car, and walked wearily over to the hall door of his block of flats. He noticed with a sinking feeling that the door was ajar. He cautiously pushed the door fully open, and peered inside. He saw a shadow invade the afternoon sun shining on the wall beside him, and ducked back and to the side. The weighted fist that had been swinging towards the back of his head whistled by him.
Jake managed to get inside the guard of his assailant before he could make use of the lead weight in his fist, and pushed him as hard as he could. The man staggered and tripped backwards down the steps.
"Get in Summers!" yelled Willace from his car. He had noticed the commotion just as he was about to leave.
Jake desperately ran over and climbed in, just as a car screeched to a halt beside them and blocked them from leaving. Willace swore.
"Goddamit! These are Jermija Drygin's toughs, right?"
"Yes! Oh god... what are we going to do? They're all be armed to the teeth. I can't believe daylight isn't worrying him anymore!"
"We could talk to them. Have a cup of tea and a biscuit, perhaps."
"Are you serious?"
"Of course not! I can't stand tea. However; they are determined to get you, but didn't start shooting. Which means they want you alive for the moment. It might be time to cut our losses, particularly since I left my Glock at home today."
---
"So, Mr Summers. I see you have brought a friend. And my money! This is a nice surprise. I got the impression, after the way you treated Stefan's boys and Yuri, that you didn't want to speak with me."
"Yeah, look, you know how it is, you didn't have time to explain all the... details... of the situation to them, and they wouldn't listen to me, because they are such loyal men, and everything. I had to look after myself, until I had a chance to get here with your money, and explain everything."
Jermija paced around the desk to the chair where Jake was sitting, handcuffed, and barely spared a glance for the rotund man in the second chair nearby. His four armed henchmen stood around the room, looking bored.
"So it's a good thing I sent out the welcoming party, no?"
"Yeah. Good thing."
"Yes, with all your good luck with the roulette last night, I wouldn't have wanted you to get lost on your way here."
"Yeah. That's right."
Jermija walked around and sat in his high-backed leather chair, and pulled a revolver out of one of it's drawers.
"We play roulette in Russia as well. But we play it... differently."
He loaded a single round into the gun and snapped it closed. He spun the cylinder, put the gun to his head, took a deep breath, and pulled the trigger. There was a loud click. Everyone in the room gave a sigh of relief, even Jake and Willace. Jerimija smiled.
"It is a wonderful feeling, this. Better than getting marble in numbered wheel, no?"
Jermija spun the cylinder of the gun again, and slid it across the table towards Jake. He nodded to one of his thugs, who pulled out a set of keys and undid Jake's handcuffs.
"I hear you are very lucky man. Perhaps you show us how the game is played."
Jake looked at the gun uneasily. Then he looked at Willace. Willace shrugged.
Jake picked up the gun, put it to his head, closed his eyes and pulled the trigger. The click it made was the most wonderful sound Jake had ever heard in his life.
Jake smiled and put the pistol down on the desk again, sliding it back over to Jermija.
"Wow, you are right. It's a good feeling. So how about you let my friend here out of his cuffs? I'm sure we can put this whole thing behind us, now that we've played your game."
"Oh, but Mr Summers! You are very lucky man! This one bullet was no worry for you!"
Jermija opened the revolver and placed 4 additional rounds in the cylinder. He closed it, spun the cylinder and slid the gun over towards Jake.
"Now this, Mr Summers is fun for you, no? I think if you win this one time, your friend here can go, but we kill him if we ever see him again. If you win this two times, your friend is our friend. If you win this three times, you both go, but you, Mr Summers, die if I see you again. If you win 4 times, you are both my friends. If you refuse, you both die here now."
He pulled out another gun and loaded it. He looked coldly at Jake.
Jake had heard a lot about Jermija's eccentricities. He had a feeling that Jermija would keep his word, but even Willace had winced at the odds of that many shots without firing a bullet. It wasn't money at stake here. On the other hand, there were 4 armed men and Jermija, who would be shooting him full of holes if he tried anything, or refused.
---
What should Jake do?
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Last edited by DukeReg on Sat Jul 01, 2006 2:54 am; edited 1 time in total
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Sat Jul 01, 2006 12:46 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | Jake faced the thugs, who had slowed to a smug walk as they entered the alley and saw that Jake was trapped. Jake decided right |
A couple to many 'Jakes' here I think Duke! Try replacing one of them with 'he' maybe.
| Quote: | | Why does a casino win, Summers, even in games where the odds are close enough to even to make no difference?" |
The odds are quite firmly in a casino's favor actually. Zero on it's own accounts for about 10% of the profits. (Roulette) All other games also favor the casino. Not by much sometimes, but by enough.
Anyway, enough of that.
Great chapter Duke!
He has the luck doesn't he? Use it! 4 times is the charm! He should try and get the boss to play as well though, maybe suggest he is a coward if he doesn't. Hehe.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Sat Jul 01, 2006 3:34 am Post subject: |
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| chinaren wrote: | | Quote: | | Why does a casino win, Summers, even in games where the odds are close enough to even to make no difference?" |
The odds are quite firmly in a casino's favor actually. Zero on it's own accounts for about 10% of the profits. (Roulette) All other games also favor the casino. Not by much sometimes, but by enough. |
Yes, what you say is quite true.
*Rapidly presses red button under desk.*
...
*Presses again.*
...
Stupid guards, what do I pay them for?
Seriously though China, it was simply a matter of needing an example that sounds reasonable if you aren't familiar with exact odds, or casino income, or what have you.
Since luck and probability are not the normal or garden variety in this story, consider this an insight into how chance and probability work in my game world.
All that is really being said is that, given alternating runs of good and bad luck of enough magnitude, the game will eventually end with the losing streak matching the limit of the player's bank account.
As long as the point is made, I am content with the way it is written.
Thanks for the input though!
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Smee
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| Posted: Sat Jul 01, 2006 3:48 am Post subject: |
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Excellent Chapter Duke - I enjoyed it.
This is a refreshing storygame, and interesting decision points.
If we're still allowed to toy with the luck it might be fun for the gun to 'luckily' fall apart apart after 3 rounds.
Personally I don't see the need to go to all 4 rounds - I don't think we have any intention of seeing this guy again and he's probably not much nicer as a friend than an enemy.
Do the minimum to get out of there as soon as possible.
Happy Writing
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Sat Jul 01, 2006 4:43 am Post subject: |
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Yeah, I'm enjoying this storygame too. I'm not sure about trusting Fate though - she's a mean old biddy.
Jake's a gambler. He'll probably go for it - one shot at a time, more convinced each time that his luck isn't going to run out.
If you were asking us for a twist of luck, though, I'd say that each time he's about to pull the trigger, something happens to interrupt the shot. Jermija's phone rings. A gunshot fires from somewhere else in the building. A soot-covered bird lands down the chimney and starts fluttering madly around the room... the more bizarre the better.
But, since you're not, I'd say Jake should go ahead and trust his luck.
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Starwalker
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| Posted: Sat Jul 01, 2006 4:55 am Post subject: |
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I like this ... now about playing with luck.
Let's go for it, 4 shots huuu; 6 round revolver, 5 bullets, sooooo; we get one empty chamber, 2 misfires due to dud bullets and the firing pin breaks off on the 4th try.
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LordoftheNight
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| Posted: Sat Jul 01, 2006 11:15 am Post subject: |
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He's being handed a gun with 5 bullets. There are five people in the room who want him dead. Hmm.
How about instead of shooting himself, he single-handedly trys to take all of them on. Of course, as he fires the first shot, the recoil knocks him from his feet, and the guards returning fire flies over his head, and into their opposite numbers.
Just lucky of course.
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Starwalker
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| Posted: Sat Jul 01, 2006 11:21 am Post subject: |
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| Hmmm, that sounds like a good idea too.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Sat Jul 01, 2006 7:34 pm Post subject: |
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| lordofthenight wrote: | He's being handed a gun with 5 bullets. There are five people in the room who want him dead. Hmm.
How about instead of shooting himself, he single-handedly trys to take all of them on. Of course, as he fires the first shot, the recoil knocks him from his feet, and the guards returning fire flies over his head, and into their opposite numbers.
Just lucky of course. |
The recoil of the gun is nowhere near enough to knock him from his feet, even with fate pushing. Remember he has been in the military, so recoil is not going to surprise him. He'd have to dive deliberately or fall off his chair or something easier for his luck to help with.
Otherwise this is a good idea, I deliberately put 5 gangsters in the room so that shootout was an option.
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Sat Jul 01, 2006 8:01 pm Post subject: |
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Well, it could explosively mis-fire (though he isn't hurt of course), making him duck and the guards let loose instinctively.
Or, as the gun is being passed to him, it goes off by accident, shooting the boss and again, making the guards all shoot at him, he ducks, they shoot at each other.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Tue Jul 04, 2006 5:00 pm Post subject: |
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Ok, good suggestions everyone.
The poll is going up now. The many suggestions given boiled down to the 4 basic options in the poll.
By the way, feel free to assume in this storygame that any decision point can involve twists of luck.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Thu Jul 06, 2006 7:09 pm Post subject: |
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I'll wait a couple more days and then close the poll.
By the way, did anyone find Chapter 2 too long?
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Sun Jul 09, 2006 4:47 pm Post subject: |
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Ok, poll deleted.
"Accidental discharge kills boss. Guards shoot each other in crossfire." won it.
New chapter soon.
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Thu Aug 03, 2006 12:33 pm Post subject: |
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I just came across this one as I was scrolling down the humour section.
How's the new chapter going, Duke?
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Thu Aug 03, 2006 5:12 pm Post subject: |
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| Shady Stoat wrote: | | How's the new chapter going, Duke? |
Eek! its been almost a month since I did a chapter! 
I ran into a blank about what to do next, and then got sidetracked with other things. I will get writing, once I have finished my first stupid Integral Calculus assignment for the semester. 
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 7:59 pm Post subject: |
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Tempting Fate Summary
Reading the whole thing is best, but this will serve if you don't have the time or inclination to read it all, or need to refresh your memory.
Prologue
Jake Summers is on a winning streak in a Casino in the US when he chances across Henry Willace, an old associate from London. Jake thinks Willace is there to get him, but Willace is resignedly uninterested in causing trouble. Instead trouble comes and gets Jake in the form of a stray bullet from America's most wanted man, who was in the Casino by chance.
Willace subdues the wanted man, and after the police have recieved a few phone calls, he is driven back to his hotel. The hotel is on fire. Willace knows in some cynical way that it was in his room, the thirteenth room, that the fire started. He goes to his car, but finds it wont start. Depressed and frustrated, Willace thinks back to his past history with Jake.
Chapter 1
(The winning vote was that Jake and Willace should have met by killing each others rivals by chance in unrelated accidents.)
It turned out that while driving at high speed to escape a van carrying some unnamed enemies, Willace was involved in a crash with a car that was driving at high speed in the opposite direction. that took him off a bridge into a river, along with the other car.
Willace was put next to Jake in a hospital ward. It turned out that the other car in the crash was carrying Jake's jealous and armed ex-lover, now deceased. Jake had caused the van chasing Willace to crash into a tree.
After a rather cryptic and strange conversation, they are both released the next day. Outside the hospital, Willace insists on giving Jake his card, saying that Jake has a relationship with luck that will eventually kill him, and that Willace can help him take control of his life. Jake finds later that there is no contact information on Willace's card, and forgets about it.
Months later, Jake is running from the henchman of an eccentric Russian gangster and loan shark named Jermija. He has been borrowing money and losing it all gambling for months. Now he is cornered in an alley by the thugs. He finds Willace's business card, which he had forgotten all about, and decides on whim that if he survives this situation, he needs to find Willace somehow and talk to him more about his offer.
Chapter 2
(The winning vote dictated that some large, angry dogs burst into the alley and attack the thugs.)
While the thugs are occupied, Jake manages to slip away and hide in a ditch for half an hour, until the thugs have given up on him.
Jake goes to a bar to have a drink, and jokingly starts pretending he is Henry Willace. He discovers over the course of the night that he is suddenly having a good run of luck, and makes a massive amount of money, and takes the game "I am Henry Willace, who cant be found" to extremes.
The next morning, somewhere in London, Willace walks out his front door to get his morning paper, when he overhears a young lady talking about staying at a hotel that night with a man named Jake Summers who was calling himself Henry Willace. Willace goes immediately to the hotel to find out what the deal is.
In the lobby, Willace wryly says he is Jake Summers, looking for Henry Willace who is staying at the hotel. Jake happens to be entering the lobby to leave the hotel at that moment. A large Russian tough grabs Willace and Jake and says he is going to cause pain to whichever one is Jake Summers. Willace summararily deals with the tough and he and Jake leave and walk to Willace's car before the police arrive.
Willace tells Jake that his run of good luck wont stop his life falling apart. He uses the gambling analogy of how a run of good luck will eventually be lost again, but large runs of bad luck bankrupt the player, and can never recover into a winning streak. He explains that it is in such a losing streak in his life that Jake will eventually have too much bad luck to handle and will be killed or otherwise crippled by it.
Willace offers Jake a top-secret job with others who have a strange relationship with luck. Jake accepts and they go to a headquarters where Jake is grilled by a hard lady named Susan Rawson, who appears to be in charge, assisted nearly silently by a scarred man named Robert Parker, and Willace. Eventually they decide to accept Jake.
Willace gives Jake a lift home, but Jake is attacked outside his flat in broad daylight by Jerimija's gangsters. He and Willace decide to surrender to avoid being killed, and they are taken to Jermija's headquarters. Jermija sits them handcuffed in a room full of armed men, and forces Jake to play a round of Russian roulette with him. Then he promises to let them both go safely if Jake can avoid shooting himself in a similar fashion 3 or 4 times with 5 bullets in the revolver.
-----
Chapter 3 will be posted tomorrow or the next day. Thanks to the mods for not deleting this for so long. It seems whenever I am not studying I am working all night these days!
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 8:40 pm Post subject: |
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Looking forward to it Duke! I was enjoying this one before your break. Happy to hear of the imminent return!
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Masterweaver
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| Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 1:40 pm Post subject: |
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Have you read ringworld? It deals with a simaler concept...
No really, it does!
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 7:57 pm Post subject: |
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Ringworld? Not familiar with it... is it a published story, or a storygame? Who is the author?
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Masterweaver
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| Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 6:55 am Post subject: |
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Larry Niven. I think. It's published and famous.
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Masterweaver
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| Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 12:58 pm Post subject: |
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One of the characters has a simaler fate.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 3:29 pm Post subject: |
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Neat. I will have to see if I can find them at the library some time.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 3:33 pm Post subject: |
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You have chosen a misfire leading to crossfire.
Tempting Fate: Chapter 3
Jake swallowed hard and made to pick up the gun, still unsure what to do. As his hand closed around the handle of the gun, there was a barely perceptible click and the revolver discharged. Jake instinctively ducked to the side, and slid out of his chair. As he dropped, he noticed Jermija clutching at his chest and crumpling to the ground.
Another shot rang out and Jake felt something pass his head. One of the four men guarding him had fired at him, but the bullet had gone straight past Jake, to hit another in the leg.
Several more shots were fired, and two more yells of pain could be heard among the general uproar in the room. The chair that Jake had been sitting in was kicked out of the way, and one of the gangsters leveled a gun at him.
There was a blur of movement, and just as the thug was about to pull the trigger, Willace crashed headfirst into the man's ribs, with force that Jake would not have believed had he not just witnessed it. The sound of a cracking rib could be barely heard through the sound of the gunshot.
The gun flew out of the man's hand as he fell to the ground with Willace on top of him. The man soon recovered from the shock and started using his hands to push Willace off him. He rolled on top of Willace with his hands gripping his neck in a strangle-hold, while Willace lashed around like a fish out of water, trying to buck him off.
All this had happened in the space of a few seconds. Jake got up off the ground as a shot was fired at where he had been by one of the wounded gansters. He felt a kind of adrenaline-filled disconnection as he leveled his shaky gun hand at the gangster and shot him. He did the same for the 2 others, before taking a step and putting the gun to the head of the man who had barely managed to keep Willace pinned. He pulled the trigger, before releasing the gun and dropping to his knees next to Willace.
"For god's sake Jake! Don't crash on me yet! Get the keys and uncuff me!" puffed Willace.
Jake did as he was told, mechanically. He had never killed anyone before. Army training hadn't prepared him for it. He felt like he would pass out. He had to try 3 times to get the key into the lock of the cuffs.
As soon as one wrist was free, Willace took the keys from Jake and undid the cuff on the other wrist on his own. Willace surveyed the scene, and Jake, critically.
"You didn't have much choice. I wouldn't have done anything differently. That probably doesn't make it easier now, but it will later."
Willace made some calls and soon there were armed men in black escorting them to a van. It drove away, leaving the scene silent and calm.
---
Days later, Jake showed up at his first scheduled training session. He had pulled himself together a bit, since the shock of killing and the stress of being roasted over a slow fire by Susan Rawson over the vitally-challenged Russian and his henchmen. Eventually, the Agency had agreed to accept him on a strict probation. Jake suspected Willace had something to do with that.
Training was nothing to write home about, for secrecy's sake and because it was rather uninteresting anyway. But Jake learnt a lot about the other agents. The one who made the biggest impression on Jake, other than Henry Willace himself, was Robert Parker.
---
Willace told Jake about Robert Parker, who was a cold and lifeless man, who performed tasks efficiently and with no wasted words. Talking to Willace, Jake learned that years before, when his parents were alive, Robert had been much different.
Back in those days, there had been 2 star agents in the group, Marcus and Sandra Parker. They were famous, or infamous, for being lucky in every way. They were both attractive, intelligent people, with money and power within and outside the agency. They gave birth to a gifted and handsome son, who was the pride and joy of his parents. He grew up and it was clear that he too was as lucky as a man could be. Women were putty in Robert's hands. He was rich, he made friends everywhere, and he was a kind and good natured man.
Then one night, after Robert graduated from university, the brakes failed on his car and it crashed into a tree. The crash was relatively minor, but both of his parents were dead when the ambulance arrived. Robert was taken to hospital and barely survived emergency brain surgery, leaving the operating room a changed man.
The whole time Willace was telling the story, he was giving Jake looks to hint that maybe he could learn from this. Jake noticed, but wasn't convinced.
"I know you want me to be careful, but what can I do? You have said over and over that luck runs good and bad and we cant control it... I might as well make the most of it, right? Thats what we do in this job, for crying out loud!"
"Summers, you have to stop abusing the luck. You twist and writhe to avoid your bad luck, and then jump on the good luck train and ride it until it derails. You and I are doomed, like all people, to die before we want to. But you can have a good life, and even extend it a little by playing your cards right. Think about it."
Willace looked at his wristwatch and stood up from the bar where they had been having some stiff drinks. "Anyway, are you 'calm' enough for your first operation now? We have to go."
"Yeah I think so. I'll be right with you." Jake said, swaying slightly as he walked towards the Men's Room.
---
Ok people, the chapter is rather short today. I tried to replace long confusing dialogue with paraphrased/summarised paragraphs. See what you think.
The DP is, what should the first operation be? Who and where? What's the weather like? Is it day or night? What scale is the operation on? Is it stealthy or guns blazing?
I basically want you to set the scene as they imagine it (in point form, I don't expect you to write it for me!) and the eventual poll will have options: "X's scene", "Y's scene" and so forth.
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 8:30 pm Post subject: |
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Glad to see this one back Duke!
Hmmm. I can't think of anything just now, but I will go away and ponder it.
Not sure if having a few stiff drinks before a mission is a really good idea though!
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Sun Nov 26, 2006 3:59 am Post subject: |
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| chinaren wrote: | | Not sure if having a few stiff drinks before a mission is a really good idea though! |
I thought you of all people would approve.
The people in this story are slightly unconventional folk I'm afraid, and see things in a slightly different way to the average sensible person.
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Chinaren
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Masterweaver
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| Posted: Sun Nov 26, 2006 6:38 am Post subject: |
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His first operation is to rob an old-style bank across the country and be back by midnight. It is a bright and sunny day when he does this.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Thu Dec 07, 2006 4:37 pm Post subject: |
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I was hoping for more than one suggestion. 
Oh well, if I don't get any more in the next few days, I will use Masterweaver's suggestion by default.
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LordoftheNight
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| Posted: Thu Dec 07, 2006 8:26 pm Post subject: |
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OK then - they've learnt that a terrorist organisation of some variety is planning to assassinate the town mayor (or something to that effect).
The mayor is refusing to cancel the (very) public speech he had planned, over some unimportant detail like concreting the park. The speech is planned in the park itself, at around 2.00.
It's a nice sunny day - not a cloud in the sky. And they have to prevent pretty much all gunfire, due to the presence of many civilians.
That should do it.
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Thu Dec 07, 2006 8:44 pm Post subject: |
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| Masterweaver wrote: | | If I say YAY!, will my post be deleted? |
Yes.
A mission ummm. To rescue a hostage from a rival organization. The rival org has people who's powers confer bad luck on others.
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Masterweaver
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| Posted: Fri Dec 08, 2006 5:02 am Post subject: |
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And they have a fortres and lazers and yada yada yada...
I say it should involve stealing, though bad luck men are cool too.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Fri Dec 15, 2006 1:00 am Post subject: |
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Poll is up.
I have to think further about whether conferring bad luck will work with my ideas of fate in this game, but good suggestion China! I knew there was a reason we kept you around. 
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Fri Dec 15, 2006 2:49 am Post subject: |
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| DukeReg wrote: | | I knew there was a reason we kept you around. |
I have my uses. Not many, and most of them are peverse, but some. 
'ted for the option like what I said.
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Masterweaver
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| Posted: Fri Dec 15, 2006 2:45 pm Post subject: |
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Voted for mine!
On a dark and stormy night, eh? Hahaha...
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 6:49 am Post subject: |
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Ok, so its a tie. I am going to wait until after Christmas, and if no-one else has voted, I will cast my own vote to break the tie.
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JezSharp
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| Posted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 6:57 am Post subject: |
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| Tie broken for the dark and stormy night.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 6:57 pm Post subject: |
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Ok, writing of the new chapter will now commence. Thanks for sticking this story out guys!
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Masterweaver
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| Posted: Fri Dec 22, 2006 7:26 am Post subject: |
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Aww, I wanted to have him rob a bank...
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dinranwen
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| Posted: Wed Jan 03, 2007 2:43 pm Post subject: |
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| Glad to see this back on track Duke! I look forward to your new chapter.
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| Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2007 8:55 pm Post subject: |
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"Rescuing hostage from rival organisation (on a dark and stormy night, why not?)" won chapter 3.
Tempting Fate: Chapter 4
May contain mild coarse language, violence and tall stories.
Leaving the pub, Willace wondered if he had let Jake drink too much. Jake certainly didn't look like he had only had a couple, and he was infamous for drinking people under the table. Then Willace realised that the drinks hadn't affected him. He was still almost shaking from nerves. The first time took different people in different ways. The pouring rain, of all things, seemed to settle Jake down more than the drinks.
When they arrived at their destination, Willace explained to Jake:
"You will be with Parker. Do as he says."
"Hey, I thought I'd be with you! How come you took me here if-"
"You ask too many questions, you know that? The people we are dealing with are resourceful, and rely on intelligence. We have more luck and balls than intelligence, so we can afford to mix things up when dealing with them. Parker's waiting in the van over there."
Jake bit his lip and walked over to the van, thinking about what he had been told about Robert Parker earlier. He couldn't help suspecting that Willace had arranged this just to emphasise his earlier warnings.
When Jake entered the van, letting in a gust of wind and rain in with him, Robert didn't look up. Robert merely held out an envelope and said "Here are the details of the operation. There are "hostages" and there are "hostiles", don't get the two confused."
Jake snatched the envelope and opened it, annoyed that the other man was being so patronising.
Apart from a terse description of the goals of the mission and how they would enter, there was 2 photographs. One was a police photograph of a woman exactly 1.7 meters tall with a cold stare, a tatoo of a knife over a scar on one side of her face, and a tight lipped expression. The other was an amateur snapshot of a smiling middle aged man holding a beer in one hand and a pleasant looking woman of similar age in the other. The woman was struck through with a red texta to avoid confusion about who was of interest in the photo.
Jake was surprised to find that the woman in the first photograph was labelled "hostage: safety is 1st priority" and the family man was labelled as "hostile: use deadly force on sight". He might have overreacted to the earlier comment, he realised.
Jake finished reading and asked: "So when are we going to be starting?"
"The moment they give us the 'go go go'. Thats what 'await go on receipt' means on your orders there."
"Ok, thanks. And thanks for before." Jake said, slightly self consciously.
"Pardon?"
"Thanks for warning me not to judge the people in the photos based on appearance."
"No problem. I almost took a bullet making a similar mistake my first time."
Jake paused. Robert's tone and expression hadn't changed, but that was unmistakably conversation for the sake of conversation. Maybe it was his accident that caused his voice to be so clipped.
"So what's Willace's deal? He's obviously not in charge, since I'm the only one he orders around, but not even Rawson seems to tell him what's what."
"I take it you aren't fond of him."
Jake blinked and replied hurriedly: "No... I mean I like the man well enough, but... well... he's very blasé about it all, and he can be a bit of a hard act to follow."
"He's the best. We just accept that he is going to do things his way. So far the benefits of keeping him have outweighed the paperwork caused by the trail of injured people who have crossed him outside of agency operations. He's also the most experienced in the entire agency, and he often does things against orders that turn out to save the day. An operation like ours needs someone like him. Besides, he has been through a lot. Its only human to cut him some slack."
"Is he married?" Jake asked, after a pause.
Robert looked at him a moment before replying.
"I guess you will hear about it eventually, so I can afford to gossip. From what my parents said, he was married, but she left him suddenly when she fell pregnant, supposedly because he wouldn't quit the agency, and she didn't want the child growing up around that kind of lifestyle. After a few years of stubbornly refusing to check up on her, he overcame his pride and went looking for her, because he still loved her, but found out that she had died in an accident years before. His daughter had been fostered and finally adopted out of country."
"Did he find her?"
"No. They lost the records. Willace didn't find out how it happened, but he had had a run of good luck over those years, and was pretty sure of why it happened."
"Fate."
"I guess so. Anyway, I wouldn't go talking to him about it offhand. He was pretty torn up about losing his wife and child. He even tried to kill himself over it."
"What?"
"Did you ever hear that urban legend about that guy who tied a noose around his neck to the guardrail at the top of a cliff, took poison, doused himself in petrol, lit himself on fire and jumped off the cliff while shooting himself in the head with a pistol?"
"I think so... something like the bullet missed his head and parted the rope, he hit the water which put the fire out, and the shock of swallowing cold sea water made him vomit up the poison. Hey wait, are you trying to tell me-"
Jake was interrupted by an electronically distorted voice saying "All units, GO GO GO!".
---
Thirteen minutes into the operation, as Willace bundled the hostage out the door and into a waiting vehicle, Robert's voice cut off abruptly in the middle of reporting that the hostile objective has been spotted. Cut off with the sound of gunfire and a cry of pain.
Willace ran back into the building to the last known location of Robert and Jake. After cautiously checking for hostiles in the immediate area, Willace checked for a pulse on Robert Parker's body and swore when he found none. Where the hell was Jake? They had been chasing the secondary objective, the hostile, George Callaway. That was a dangerous proposition in pairs, never mind on your own.
Willace silently made his way into a hallway, stomping heavily on the neck of a body lying nearby. Willace was sick of people playing dead, it looked like that was what got Parker. The old tricks were the best ones. He heard muted gunfire over the sound of rain hammering down on the roof and thunder, and followed it towards a back exit.
Willace cautiously opened the door a crack. The wind whistled through the opening and the pouring rain and thunder became suddenly loud. Through flashes of lightning, Willace saw that to his right there was a staircase dug straight down into the ground, probably leading towards a basement door. There were bushes, a parked car, a low wall and a pile of garbage bins that could serve as cover. No hostiles were visible, and no gunfire could be heard. Willace stepped out, crouching low just in case.
Muzzle flashes and the roar of gunfire from several concealed gunmen coincided with three solid thumps on Willace's body armour and an agonising pain in his left shoulder. He half dived, half ran down into the stairway for cover, but a bullet hit his leg just before another rang off his helmet. Willace swore violently and fell down, rolling to the bottom of the short stairwell in a heap. His head rang, and he could taste blood in his mouth. He must have bitten his lip.
A shape loomed nearby with the butt of a gun poised to slam into Willace's head, but Willace couldn't do more than try to hunch his shoulders and wriggle out of the way.
The figure froze, and lowered the gun.
"Oh my god, Willace, are you alright?" came Jake's shaky voice.
"What the hell do you think Summers?" snapped Willace, pushing himself into a sitting position where he could cover the stairway with his gun.
"There's no door here. It's all bricked up. They sent someone to go get some grenades or something. There weren't supposed to be so many of them. Where did they all come from?" Jake's voice was near hysterical.
"Calm down Summers! We have backup waiting as a last resort, remember?" snapped Willace. He spoke tersely into the radio, detailing the situation, and heard the response, "Backup is on its way".
"Rawson is going to have a fit." muttered Willace, trying to stop his head spinning, "Why the hell didn't you ask for backup?".
"I didn't know about all these guys waiting! By the time I got down here I didn't know what to do, and..."
"Alright, shut up! I thought I told you to calm down." Willace growled wearily.
Jake took a few deep breaths and composed himself.
"We're going to die if we don't do something." he muttered.
"Backup is on its way. Cover the stairs and try to throw any grenades out again. You never know, they might be that stupid."
"Yeah, as if."
"Oh well, if they aren't, its just bad luck for us isn't it?" Willace said, already sick of Jake's new-found pessimism.
Jake hesitated for a moment and gave a short bark of a laugh. "You know what? That's bullshit. Dying in this kind of situation can never be down to luck, can it? It's bound to happen. There's no room for luck. But, if we survived... now that would be lucky..."
Jake trailed off. He began to get to his feet to go up and face Callaway and his men.
"Dammit Summers, get down, that's an order!" yelled Willace, trying to get hold of Jake to pull him back down. Jake shrugged him off, the order falling on deaf ears.
Willace didn't know what warped logic was guiding Jake at the moment, but he was powerless to do anything with his injuries. He had already lost a lot of blood. He'd be fine if the backup arrived before the hostiles rushed in, but that wasn't going to happen with Jake out of action.
"Good luck, kid." Willace muttered, before blacking out.
How should Jake tempt fate, saving himself and Willace from being killed? Make this a big one... this is the last DP!
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2007 11:34 pm Post subject: |
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Another new chapter at last!
NO idea on how to get out of this one at the moment. I will have to think on it.
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| Posted: Mon Feb 19, 2007 2:56 am Post subject: |
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He could just try running the gauntlet, somehow dodging bullets while shooting back with pinpoint accuracy.
Of course, whenever someon tries to throw a grenade, he could shoot it out of their hands. That'd be pretty lucky.
It's not particularly original, but what can you do.
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Tue Feb 20, 2007 5:04 am Post subject: |
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| lordofthenight wrote: | | Of course, whenever someon tries to throw a grenade, he could shoot it out of their hands. That'd be pretty lucky. |
It sure would. I'd like to see the gunmen get out of that one!
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2007 4:18 pm Post subject: |
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I've still only had one suggestion... I'd like another one before going to poll. Someone? Anyone!
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2007 5:35 pm Post subject: |
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Well, it's pretty weak, but maybe the floorboards could give way, allowing him access to an underground tunnel network?
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DukeReg
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| Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:09 pm Post subject: |
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Poll is up.
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Masterweaver
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| Posted: Sat Apr 21, 2007 7:03 pm Post subject: |
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What? Only two options?
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| Posted: Sun May 06, 2007 8:47 pm Post subject: |
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"Ground gives way into forgotten tunnels - they escape." won the Chapter 4 poll.
Tempting Fate: Chapter 5
Jake took a running step onto the short staircase, which had been made slippery by the rain. His leading foot immediately slid off the stair it had landed on. Just as his head rose over the level of the staircase, and before he began to fall back down, he heard a thunder of gunfire, and bullets whistling past his head. Then gravity smashed him back into the ground at the bottom of a staircase with a restounding and slightly hollow thump. There was also a splintering sound. Jake was just starting to recover from being winded when he felt the ground shift, along with another splintering noise, and finally give way. This time Jake managed to slide feet first down into the dark space below. He noticed Willace slide past and slump to the ground, in the way only a ragdoll or someone completely relaxed can slump.
"Dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, ..." Jake swore repeatedly as he looked around. He was feeling close to hysteria. He took a deep breath and switched on his flashlight. He found a single opening in the dark room. It was not so much a doorway, as a collapsed section of brick wall. Jake grabbed Willace under the arms and with effort began to drag him towards the opening.
Once on the other side, Jake noticed piles of crates and boxes that didn't appear to be very old. He ignored them and strained to lift Willace over the bricks. He finally managed to get Willace across to a stairwell, before slumping in exhaustion.
"... Dammit. Dammit. Willace will you wake up already? God-freaking-dammit." He finally subsided, his adrenaline rush wearing off.
After a moment he could hear voices shouting back where they had fallen through the floor. He groaned and started to drag Willace up the stairs. He tried the handle of the door and found to his surprise that the door opened easily. He noticed too late the gun barrels pointing at him.
"You are lucky we happened to be passing, Summers. Damned lucky."
---
"You have no idea where he would have gone?" demanded Rawson, arms crossed in front of her chest.
"None. I've been in hospital, how am I supposed to have kept in contact with him? Telepathy?" Willace snorted.
"Don't get snappy with me. If he want's to leave that's fine by me. He's going to become a liability very quickly. But we need to know that he understands that he can't go talking about us to any pretty face or whoever is buying the next round at his local!"
"We'll have to track him down the usual way."
"We've tried. He's better at avoiding detection than I thought he would be."
Willace looked at her for a while, before saying, "Then I don't think we need to worry about him doing anything that might bring our attention to him. Including blabbing to pretty faces in pubs."
It was Rawson's turn to stare at Willace. Finally, she threw up her hands and said "We'll just have to leave it to fate then."
She nodded in satisfaction when Willace flinched, before leaving the hospital ward.
Willace lay awake. Where the hell was Jake? And had he learned anything from the experience?
Tempting Fate: Epilogue
The faint sound of footsteps intruded on Willace's recollections. He turned to see a young woman looking at him nervously. Willace recognised her as the woman who had been asking something of the people in front of the burning hotel earlier. There was something else familiar about her that Willace couldn't put his finger on.
The woman spoke.
"Are you Henry Willace? The one that was staying at the hotel earlier?"
"Can I help you?"
The woman gave an uncertain half-smile and then took a deep breath.
"I'm Mrs Jessica Johnson, nee Willace. I've been searching for the past five years or so for my biological father. I know it was a one in a million chance, but when I heard by coincidence that someone by the correct name and an accent from the right area of England was staying here, I thought I should take the opportunity just to check whether..."
She trailed off as she saw that he was staring at her as though he was seeing something he had never imagined he would see. She had been right. The family resemblance was clear now that she looked at him closely, and it was obvious that he knew it to be true as well. She couldn't believe that after so many years of bad luck, she had found him by chance. It must have been fate.
Thanks to those of you who stuck this storygame out. Hopefully if I ever start another storygame, I will have enough enthusiasm to keep it going beyond a few chapters. If the last few chapters seem rushed, it is because I found myself more and more reluctant to write for this story, and I felt it would be best if I wrapped it up rather than just letting it die in mid-story. I hope you enjoyed what I did write, and look forward to someday trying again.
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Sun May 06, 2007 10:11 pm Post subject: |
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Well, at least you wrapped this one up Duke and didn't leave it to die a sad and lonely death.
Sorry to see it end abruptly, but well done anyway!
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