Chapter 6: Whispers in the Dark
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City of IF -> The Wheel - The Machine's Daughter
What do you do?
Go forward into the room with the Scarpi
30%
 30%  [ 4 ]
Turn back and show yourself to the authorities
7%
 7%  [ 1 ]
Hide as best as you can in the tunnel
61%
 61%  [ 8 ]
Total Votes : 13
Who Voted: Chinaren, D-Lotus, ethereal_fauna, jnmrcs, LordoftheNight, Mother Goose, Muaddib, Shady Stoat, Smee


#1: Chapter 6: Whispers in the Dark Author: KeyLocation: The Royal Palace PostPosted: Sat Jan 21, 2006 8:38 pm
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The sixth chapter of the featured storygame "The Machine's Daughter" has been posted:

Chapter 6: Whispers in the Dark

Discussion and voting are complete for Chapter 6.

For more about the storygame, see the New Players Start Here topic in this forum.


Last edited by Key on Sun Apr 30, 2006 6:48 pm; edited 3 times in total

#2:  Author: Muaddib PostPosted: Sat Jan 21, 2006 8:41 pm
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Theres a page error. It goes to some doteasy banner free thingymajig.

EDIT: Yeah its gone now.Sorry about that...

Excellent chapter!The mystery's deepening. Taremto's probably some myth the scarpis have about humans like Pilla.

I think she should hide, perhaps behind the figure of the male human?

#3:  Author: ChinarenLocation: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com PostPosted: Sat Jan 21, 2006 8:49 pm
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Mmm, a bit more like it.

I think the only option is to go on!

Forward!! Onwards to her destiny! Huzzah! And so on.

#4:  Author: RavenwingLocation: Virginia PostPosted: Sat Jan 21, 2006 11:28 pm
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The suspense in this chapter was a bit surprising from all the other chapters, but I really enjoyed reading it.

I agree with Muaddib, Teremto is probably a myth about Pilla. Maybe she is supposedly a figure in a prophecy for the Scarpi. But the stranger's reaction, and the voices saying to find her seems to be a sign that she is not a good omen. It seems like they tricked her, but the reason we have yet to know.

Pilla has no clue who exactly is following her I say go on forward.

#5:  Author: Shady StoatLocation: England PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2006 12:18 am
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Lovely atmospherics in this chapter. Very mysterious Smile

I'm undecided as yet. Pilla hasn't done anything wrong - what would she have to be afraid of from the city authorities? Whereas a normal girl, used to the city, would definitely flee, she has very little experience with these concepts of guilt or deceit. If someone is looking for her, she might actually view it as an opportunity rather than a threat.

On the other hand, she is in a pattern of running away now, and her emotional side has been recently awakened. That means fear and curiosity. Fear of what's behind, curiosity about what's ahead. Especially after seeing the statue that looks like her.

I'll wait to be convinced by other reasoning, I think. I'm officially on the fence Cool

#6:  Author: SmeeLocation: UK PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2006 3:52 am
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*Admires the Stoat, backlegs kicking out, scrabbling about trying to find some way of sitting on the fence in a comfortable way.*

Great chapter. Very Happy

I concur that the mystery word is definately some myth, but I'm more worried about the Scarpi than others appear to be.

Yes she has no legal reason to worry, but we know there is some kind of war and their not a friendly bunch. The talk at the end confirms that to me. Escape seems the best option.

However, she doesn't appear to be in any safer surroundings on the street, in fact everyone was staring. Maybe she's safer inside where she at least might get some answers to the statue just like her.

Ack... Surprised

*Lowers self onto fence and sips brandy*

Happy Writing. Smile

P.S Cool Scarpi graphic Cool

#7:  Author: jnmrcsLocation: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas... PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2006 10:04 am
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Very nice chapter.

She didn't do anything wrong but as some said they have some myth about her "specie". She doesn't know if that is good or bad for her. All she saw was one male (like her) in a possible combat against one scarpi. Now it's better for her don't get caught. She must continue and try to find more information there.

#8:  Author: RavenwingLocation: Virginia PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2006 4:10 pm
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The Scarpis are still a mysterious race we have yet to hear more of. But like Stoat has mentioned, both fear and curiosity is in Pilla.

Btw, Stoat, I love your new avatar. It's so cute. I just to take it and hug it. Cool

#9:  Author: LordoftheNightLocation: Hell PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2006 4:16 pm
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but it's no longer white though - what eill she do without her sexy white fur?

#10:  Author: RavenwingLocation: Virginia PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2006 4:38 pm
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I don't know use it as a rug? Actually the animal in her avatar looks more like a ferret, but that is just me. But still it looks cute! *Runs up and steals the book-reading ferret or whatever little furry animal it is* Cool

#11:  Author: Mother GooseLocation: Connecticut PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2006 5:29 pm
    —
If anyone has read "The White Queen" they will recognize Taremto as the name of the god of the holy mountain, where the Zigots are making their new settlement. But since Pilla doesn't have any knowledge of this, we can't use that information in deciding what she should or would do. Still, it's obvious she's in some sort of temple or shrine. Has she, in her philosophy studies, done any kind of comparative religion course? I suppose not, since she seems to know very little about the "animal" races.

#12:  Author: RavenwingLocation: Virginia PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2006 5:36 pm
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I would bet that Pilla's philosophy courses would not want to focus on anything pertaining to the animal races. The Zigots probably just choose to ignore the animals because they consider them inferior when it comes to intelligence. A bad assumption, but when you're smart, you're easily blind to some things when they're not obvious.

#13:  Author: KeyLocation: The Royal Palace PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2006 6:50 pm
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That's correct - in Zigot education the animal religions are covered in Animal Research, not Philosophy.

#14:  Author: Shady StoatLocation: England PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2006 11:23 pm
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Ravenwing wrote:
I don't know use it as a rug? Actually the animal in her avatar looks more like a ferret, but that is just me. But still it looks cute! *Runs up and steals the book-reading ferret or whatever little furry animal it is* Cool


This is horribly off-topic, but what the hey?

Stoats are brown and white except in winter, when their coats turn white and thick and erminey. The pic could be anything though. Stoat, weasel, ferret... I'm not really an expert Very Happy

Glad you like it though. Feel free to pick up and cuddle, I hardly bite at all Wink

#15:  Author: ethereal_faunaLocation: USA PostPosted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 4:17 am
    —
She's already uneasy, and I think that she would hide out of fear. For however brief and easily dismissed it initially was, Peran's warning about the Scarpi has to play on her mind. Esp. since she's 'done nothing wrong' and yet she's received stares and odd attitudes, and is now presumably pursued. She'll hide, and when she gets the chance she'll most likely try to make her way back to the Zigot merchants and ask them what they know about dealing with these animals, which seems like it would have been the logical thing to do in the first place.

#16:  Author: RavenwingLocation: Virginia PostPosted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 5:43 am
    —
Shady Stoat wrote:


This is horribly off-topic, but what the hey?

Stoats are brown and white except in winter, when their coats turn white and thick and erminey. The pic could be anything though. Stoat, weasel, ferret... I'm not really an expert Very Happy

Glad you like it though. Feel free to pick up and cuddle, I hardly bite at all Wink


LordoftheNight started it. Not me. *Tries to look innocent* Cool

#17:  Author: LordoftheNightLocation: Hell PostPosted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 1:01 pm
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fauna just checking - you were talking about th story not shady yes? otherwise i'm very confused

and i think she should hide

#18:  Author: ethereal_faunaLocation: USA PostPosted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 1:47 pm
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Yes, I was talking about the story. Smile

#19:  Author: RavenwingLocation: Virginia PostPosted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 2:49 pm
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It's good thing some people keep their posts on topic. Cool

#20:  Author: Chainfire PostPosted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 6:30 pm
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I must agree with fauna, I believe she should go forward and hide since she doesn't know anything about these people other than what Peran told her.

#21: heh. Author: jess1561 PostPosted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 8:01 pm
    —
New here, but caught up with the story about a week and a half ago...

I think Pilla should keep going in hopes that she might be able to overhear some conversation and figure out who is following her and why... Maybe she can find a dark corner and hide long enough to get some information...


-Jess

#22:  Author: KeyLocation: The Royal Palace PostPosted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 9:13 pm
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Hey Jess,

Welcome to the City Very Happy . Thanks for your post.

Like your sig, btw.

#23:  Author: jess1561 PostPosted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 5:44 am
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Thanks, it's from my favorite book Very Happy... I stayed up for three hours last night and read Finite Cosmos... Have any suggestions on what I should read next? I'm glad I did a search of rpg games when I was bored, I lke this site Very Happy ...

#24:  Author: Muaddib PostPosted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 7:49 am
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I loved Bushido, Monster in the Shadows is very interesting-OCish.
Some great new ones by Smee, Shady Stoat(Very humble, excellent writer).

Actually all the main page ones are really good since they won the Storygame of the Month contest.

Also check out Ram and Fish King in the archives.

#25:  Author: Mother GooseLocation: Connecticut PostPosted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 8:12 am
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The White Queen is also a part of the Wheel epic, and has to do with the Scarpi.

#26:  Author: RavenwingLocation: Virginia PostPosted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 10:45 am
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So what basically everyone is saying, Jess is that any stories that are on the main page or in the Archives are a great start. But don't forget you can post your own storygame in any of the genre related forums (Fantasy, Experimental/Humor, etc...)

Again, welcome to IF! Cool

And again we're back to being off topic. Very Happy

#27:  Author: jess1561 PostPosted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 8:16 pm
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Smile Good to be here, will check some of them out asap... Smile...

#28:  Author: ChinarenLocation: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com PostPosted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 8:59 pm
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Jess, I think you win the most buttons award at the bottom of your posts.

Sorry, off topic again. I will berate myself.

#29:  Author: KeyLocation: The Royal Palace PostPosted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 9:27 pm
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Poll's up and will run for two days.

Happy voting. Very Happy

#30:  Author: Muaddib PostPosted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 9:29 pm
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I chose to hide

#31:  Author: Suneila PostPosted: Wed Jan 25, 2006 5:19 am
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I also chose to hide. "Curious but cautious" is the way Pilla seems to react to everything so far.

~sunny

#32:  Author: LordoftheNightLocation: Hell PostPosted: Wed Jan 25, 2006 8:50 am
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go do the hiding trick

#33:  Author: Aino PostPosted: Wed Jan 25, 2006 10:08 am
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Wonderful chapter and so many big questions, like Where is she? and to the voices in the tunnel, What is she? As to what she should do, maybe she should face her fear.

#34:  Author: D-LotusLocation: Hollywood, USA PostPosted: Wed Jan 25, 2006 10:37 pm
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I chose to hide in the tunnel, preferently behind that human statue (it may bring good luck). Anyway, I wanted to congratulate the author (does she check this forum out?) on the good job she's doing and key too, for pulling it all off. Is it giving results, by the way? Oh, and welcome to probably one of the few online storytelling (and the best) websites, jess. When does the next chapter come out?

#35:  Author: jess1561 PostPosted: Wed Jan 25, 2006 10:40 pm
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chinaren wrote:
Jess, I think you win the most buttons award at the bottom of your posts.


Lmao... Hey, what can I say? I like to talk to people online... I'm not a messenger wh0re though... I prefer yahoo and only use AIM and MSN to talk to a few people... :hm:

Razz

#36:  Author: KeyLocation: The Royal Palace PostPosted: Thu Jan 26, 2006 11:14 am
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D-Lotus wrote:
I chose to hide in the tunnel, preferently behind that human statue (it may bring good luck). Anyway, I wanted to congratulate the author (does she check this forum out?) on the good job she's doing and key too, for pulling it all off. Is it giving results, by the way? Oh, and welcome to probably one of the few online storytelling (and the best) websites, jess. When does the next chapter come out?


Hey D, glad to see that you're still around Very Happy

Katie is a little shy with posting, but I think she reads all the comments, and I'm sure she appreciates the compliment. As do I.

New chapters come out every Saturday night, US Pacific time.

#37:  Author: RavenwingLocation: Virginia PostPosted: Thu Jan 26, 2006 12:14 pm
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D-Lotus wrote:
I chose to hide in the tunnel, preferently behind that human statue (it may bring good luck).


Hey look, D has returned! Welcome back, D. Haven't seen you in a while. Very Happy

I am going for the hide choice. Like Suneila said, caution is one of Pilla's traits, along with a desire for knowledge.

#38:  Author: D-LotusLocation: Hollywood, USA PostPosted: Thu Jan 26, 2006 9:30 pm
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Key wrote:
D-Lotus wrote:
I chose to hide in the tunnel, preferently behind that human statue (it may bring good luck). Anyway, I wanted to congratulate the author (does she check this forum out?) on the good job she's doing and key too, for pulling it all off. Is it giving results, by the way? Oh, and welcome to probably one of the few online storytelling (and the best) websites, jess. When does the next chapter come out?


Hey D, glad to see that you're still around Very Happy

Katie is a little shy with posting, but I think she reads all the comments, and I'm sure she appreciates the compliment. As do I.

New chapters come out every Saturday night, US Pacific time.


Wow, Saturday, so soon! It pays off to pay off someone to write for you! Smile By the way, have you met Katie, key? Or do you know her only "virtually"?

#39:  Author: KeyLocation: The Royal Palace PostPosted: Thu Jan 26, 2006 9:30 pm
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Poll's closed. Thanks for the posts and votes.

The option chosen is to hide. New chapter due in two days.

#40:  Author: D-LotusLocation: Hollywood, USA PostPosted: Thu Jan 26, 2006 9:31 pm
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Wow, posted in the exact same minute!



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