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Smee wrote: |
Sparta,
The plot continues as interesting as ever - the new railgun particularly good. However... I don't know if you were tired or in a rush, but this chapter had ALOT of errors in it. Many awkward sentences, missing words, repetition and typos. Not your usual standard at all I suggest having a good read through and a heavy editting session. If you're struggling let me know and I'll try to help. Happy Writing. |
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All three twams were relieved |
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He also saw the heavily armoured security guards throwing small grenades into the clusters of crowds then pulling up their shields to avoid the shockwave that rendered the people inside the blast-radius unconcious. The guards however would just be rocked backwards seeing that the plastic-like-shields protected them from the laser-like-shockwave. |
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Also seeing that I am on school holidays due to the Commonwealth Games |
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