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misterbiz
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 Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 8:50 pm Post subject: |
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Now Polling...I'll leave it up 1:00 am Tuesday...so I can add one more chapter before I vanish for a bit.
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PopeAlessandrosXVIII
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| Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2011 1:17 am Post subject: I Think..... |
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Argh....It ate my post....Let's try this again!
Me likes me likes!
There were definaetly less spelling issues with this one, big plus! I wanted to kick the girls at first, but now I get their way of thinking. I like the dad encounter, but I feel a little more internal stuffs could have helpped a bit. I know action and voice express a lot, but I feel that our "hero" is a lot deeper than he lets on.
I missed voting, which is good in some respects I suppose. I would have sent you all off into the abyss! Keep the chappys comin'!
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To Be A Knight
And my first Finished work Death Day
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misterbiz
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| Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2011 2:39 am Post subject: |
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I looked up at the two girls and flashed a smile at them. My eyes drifted to Rat who was rising from her pew and starting toward me. As I opened my mouth to say something, I heard a clatter come from somewhere in the distance of the church. i looked to Ana who quickly rushed off to grab the bag of guns I had thrown. Once she head it clutched in her hand, I pushed the door open and motioned for the girls to leave. both rushed out and I followed close behind.
"Alright, let's go vehicle shopping," I said. "Clearly the church isn't as safe as we thought. But I do know a place we can rest for a bit, though a vehicle would be quite helpful in getting there."
"Alright, where do we look though? I mean theres a good deal in and around the streets but most of them are totaled," she said.
A devilish smile crossed my lips and started down the street. I stopped and turned and looked back toward the van. For a moment, I just looked at it. Something seemed wrong about leaving Kobra there. Just walking away without making sure that she was gone. But deep down, i knew there was nothing any of us could do so I looked forward and started walking.
In silence the three of us strolled with me in the lead. After a couple of blocks I looked around to get my bearings. Once I was sure of where I was, i turned and strolled down another street, taking a shuffler out as I went. I dropped another couple of them and stopped as I approached an old vehicle repair shop. Next door to it as a large garage used to store the overflow of vehicles. I closed my eyes and thought back once more to my childhood. Of my father driving me through town and pointing out important locations. My eyes opened as I looked at the building and nodded.
"Pops keeps extra bikes in here," I said as I moved to the side door of the garage. I tried it but found it locked. "And only he would lock a door to vital supplies during the end of the world. Fucking asshole," I let out a shout and kicked the door. Unfortunately, there was no action movie luck on my side and instead of opening, I merely felt a sharp pain go through my leg.
"Allow me," Ana said, stepping forward. She knelt down and pulled a bobby pin from her boot and started to pick the lock. After a couple minutes, I watched as she stood up and pushed the door open with a smirk on her face. I smirked back at her and stepped into the building. In the middle of the warehouse where ten pristine motorcycles.
"H...h...holy m...moly," Rat said as she looked at the bikes. "These will d...d...do nicely," she said as she looked over to me.
"Hells yeah they will. These bikes are fucking priceless," Ana said. as she jogged over to one. She strapped the satchel across her back and got on one. "ho yeah, these babies are nice."
"And all are ready for travel. My dad and his crew would make sure that they were ready to drive out of here within seconds of needing them," I said as I walked up to a wall and flipped a switch. Looking toward the front and watched in pleasant surprise as the door lowered. "And of course. Must have a backup generator connected to it."
"I c...c...can't ride one. D...d...don't know how," Rat said. I looked to her before letting out a sigh.
"Alright, you ride with me," I said. I moved to a bike and jumped onto it, tucking the gun into the small of my back before motioning to Rat. Rat slid onto it behind me and wrapped her arms tight around me. Giving a look to Ana, I kicked the bike to life and then proceeded to drive out of the garage, with Ana riding beside me. Side by side we rode through the streets of Eternia, careful to avoid all the shufflers that roamed the streets. After a good time later, I started to fully recognize where I was.
My eyes moved around and studied the chaos and the carnage that used to be my district of the city. Even though everything about it was destroyed, I couldn't really say that it looked much worse than it did when I was growing up. I pulled the bike over in front of the local police station. Ana slowed up and stopped a few feet in front of me. I looked around again but something started to feel off. I looked to my hand and noticed a small tremble forming in my fingertips.
"Shit," I mumbled. "Not now. Not fucking now. Not again," I mumbled to myself as I got off the bike. "Look, there's something I got to take care of in here."
"L...l...like what?" Rat asked.
"Just need to look up someone's address. Need their police file to do it," I lied. "It may be a way out of here. A guy who may know a guy who may be able to get in contact with a pilot type of deal." The truth was, I did know someone but was already on my way to meet them. What I needed here was something from an evidence box. The craving which I knew I should refuse.
The girls looked to each other and nodded before getting off their bikes. With a self-satisfied smirk, I walked into the building.
The first step I took inside nearly caused me to vomit. The smell of decay and burnt meat, hair and flesh was heavy and thick. It clung to the air and seemed to be coming off of every wall. Behind me, I heard one of the girls vomit followed by the sound of one bolting out the door to do the same. The path in front of me was littered with corpses. I studied all of them carefully as I moved past them. Half of them appeared to have been burned greatly while the other half all seemed to be in poses that that they had killed themselves.
"T...th...this is h...hor...hor...horrible," Rat stammered as she followed behind me. I heard the front door open and turned to see Ana returning. She moved up to us and stared around at the rotten carnage we were seeing.
"Yeah. Let's split up. Ana, check out the armory see if there's anything we can use. Rat, take the security office. See if there are any clues as to what the fuck happened here. I'm going to look in the evidence locker and personnel files," I explained.
"Good idea," Ana said. Rat opened her mouth to speak but closed it quickly when she couldn't say anything and just nodded. Ana dug out a gun for her and handed it over and I quickly pulled out mine. We all looked at each other for a moment before heading off to our respective locations.
I walked to the evidence storage and looked around cautiously. The evidence clerk was dead a few feet in from the doorway, a file clutched in its hand. I knelt down and examined the file for a moment. There was something odd about it.
The usual police code was absent. All the average markings that a file in a police station would have was absent. Instead there was a large picture on the front of it. The insignia was in the design of two young boys sitting on each end of a mysterious hooded figure who was clearly an adult. The child on the left had his hands over his ears, the child on the right had his hands over his eyes and the hooded figure had his hand over his mouth.
Slowly I rose, the picture starting to creep me out some and quickly moved further into the room. i moved from aisle to aisle until I found what I need. A large cardboard box. Under the case number was the name E. Silver. I put my gun away and grabbed the box and pulled it from the shelf.
With frenzied hands I dug through the items in the box. Inside it there was a set of keys, a set of bloodied and tattered clothing, some makeup items, a bottle of pills and a picture. I grabbed the pills and the picture and removed them. I stared at the picture for a moment and a teared sprung to my eye almost instantly.
The picture was of a young girl who appeared to in her early teens. She had raven black hair that was braided into pigtails. She was wearing a white silk dress that came down to her knees and a pair of crimson high heels. Next to her was a young man who was about three years older. A young man with a head of slicked back black hair who was dressed in a pair of jeans and a leather vest. A younger me.
I looked from my emotionless smile to her bright and beaming one and let out a sigh. "I'm so sorry, Lizzie. I'm so sorry. At least you aren't here to see this," I said. Several more tears rolled from my eyes but I quickly wiped them away as I stood and slipped the picture into my back pocket. I took a look to the bottle of painkillers and looked away from them. I couldn't do this. Not now. I had to fight the urge and keep a clear head. I had managed this long without them so what was another few hours. Turning on my heel I started toward the door but stopped. I am in pain, I thought. Without a second thought, I ran back and grabbed them. Cautiously I slid them into my pocket before heading out. As I left the evidence Locker, I cast another look to the creepy folder in the charred cop's grasp.
"G...g...guys," I heard Rat shout. "G...got someth...something." I took off at a jog and moved through the foul corridors until I found myself and the central hub of security for the whole building. Nearing the door, I noticed a restroom and an urge came over me to run in and quickly down a couple of pills. An urge that was fought as viciously by another part of me wanting to dispose of them.
"What is it?" I asked.
"M...m...mon..." she stuttered before becoming frustrated at the first thing that struck me was that it was the only one on. In stunned silence I stared at it, never blinking until I heard Ana's steps behind me. She moved up beside me and I heard her gasp.
"Holy shit," she said. I nodded in agreement and together we just stared. It showed a strange individual wearing a pair of jeans and a straightjacket. He was pacing around a room which didn't appear to be a normal cell, constantly trying to remove the straightjacket he was in. After a minute of pacing he stopped and stared up at the camera. Carefully, I looked at him. After a minute of looking at him I noticed something quite disturbing. He had a large steel plate over his mouth that looked like it was screwed to his skull.
"This can't be good," Ana said. "He's in a straightjacket in a cop shop. We should just go now. Forget about him. He's probably a nut job of some sort."
"That may be but you are missing another important aspect about this guy," I said.
"What?"
"Look at his movements. The way he walks normally. The way he tries to remove the jacket. He's not a shuffler."
"That video could have been taken at anytime. How do you know its not a loop," Ana asked.
"Simple. The timestamp," I said pointing to the corner of the screen. "And also," I reached down with one hand and moved a small joystick which caused the image to pan over as well. "I can do that."
"Oh shit, then that means..."
"Yep. He's alive."
***********
Ok. What now? Try to find the stranger in the building? Leave him? And what about Leon's pills? Should he pop a couple to appease his urges and soothe his pain? Should he flush them? Save them for later? His future is in your hands?
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Last edited by misterbiz on Wed Jun 29, 2011 10:18 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Thunderbird
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| Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2011 8:30 am Post subject: |
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Great chapter Bizzy! And well done on keeping a former reader of the former version still guessing!
I really like how you've depicted Rat. She stands out as a loveable character but not in the romantic sense and I think you've done well to eliminate her from that sort of consideration so another can take that spotlight. Nice.
Anyhow, the guy in holding. Personally, I'd just leave him alone and get the hell out of there. Alive or not, he's in a straight jacket and mouth plated for a reason and I wouldn't care to know why - we have enough problems on our hands without a psycho on our team.
BUT, for the sake of the story and my piqued interest, and possible out of some empathy for the guy - he may not be as bad as he was assumed to be and if left would surely die painfully of starvation/thirst - I'd have to say we should at least pay him a visit and 'feel out' his situation however we can (might take removing those bolts)
As for the pills, he's got to wean himself off of them so that he keeps his nerves in tact right now (and could be downright dangerous to his health NOT to.) So though he may feel ashamed of some lack of willpower, he needs to realize he's not likely going to be getting any refills any time soon so he should take only just enough to stay grounded and do all he can to stretch out his self-medicating doses longer and longer as he goes from here.
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 CHAPTER 25: Near-Light Speed (NEW CHAPTER! (12/4/2011))
Zephyrrr! And...  
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D-Lotus
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| Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2011 9:46 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | Once I was sure of where I was, i turned and strolled down another street, taking a shuffler out as I went. I dropped another couple of them and stopped as I approached an old vehicle repair shop. |
The way this is written makes it seem very casual. The shufflers don't appear to be menacing at all. That's what I'm lacking from this story-- a sense of danger generated by the zombies.
| Quote: | | "M...m...mon..." she stuttered before becoming frustrated at the first thing that struck me was that it was the only one on. In stunned silence I stared at it, never blinking until I heard Ana's steps behind me. She moved up beside me and I heard her gasp. |
This is a bit unclear. Make sure you mention that the characters are viewing a monitor, otherwise the reader has to read on in puzzlement to figure out what it is.
The addiction to the painkillers and the emotional attachment to his old lover was an excellent touch.
I'd say that we can't simply leave this guy here to starve to death-- that would be inhumane. But since he's a stark raving lunatic, we should use the painkillers to drug him and carry him away safely.
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 Chapter 5: The Rendezvous
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Andolyn
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| Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2011 2:52 pm Post subject: |
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can i just say...I LOVED THIS CHAPTER.
i'd say lets at least go meet this guy. he's in a cell...so we would still have the option to leave him if we go see him. i would also like to know what was in that case file.
ima go out on a limb here and say, what would happen Rat finds the pills and (being the medic of the group) offers to help him?
ima miss this while you're gone! lol
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Tainted Biohazard
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| Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2011 1:18 pm Post subject: |
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I disagree with some of the above sentiments. We need this guy. It takes the insanely aggressive to survive this sort of environment. I think he could be a strong asset. Release him unconditionally.
I think I have a favorite author on IF. What better compliment can I give here?
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Tikanni Corazon
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| Posted: Tue Jun 14, 2011 6:22 am Post subject: |
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Finally got around to reading this, Bizzy (sorry for the delay) and I have to say, I can see why so many people like it! 
I have to say, I'm not really all that bothered about a lack of true menace from the zombies, as, though they're obviously a pretty big part of the storyline, I get the feeling that there is another underlying it. Am I right in thinking that the girl in the picture with him is the sister that his father mentioned? This line struck me, whilst reading...
| Quote: | | "I'm so sorry, Lizzie. I'm so sorry. At least you aren't here to see this," |
...Though I may be wrong, this would suggest to me that she died, or was possibly sent somewhere outside of Eternia, before all of this shit with the zombies. And from the obvious animosity between Leon and his father, and from this line in chapter 4...
| Quote: | | Yeah, I'm sure you are, you cheeky little motherfucker. How have you been since you put that knife in my back, anyway? How's your sister? |
...One gets the feeling that the 'How's your sister?' part, is said in some kind of crude sarcasm, like it's obvious that she's not likey to be alright. Whatever happened to her, I get the feeling that their father was somehow involved, and that it might have been the reason he was sent to prison. I've got my own views on what that involvement might consist of, but I'll keep shtum for now. 
I also like the mention of the 'hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil' design of the emblem on the clipboard. Sounds rather creepy. And it is things like that, and this underlying story with Leon and his family, that is adding a slight tension into the tale. For me anyway.
Anyways, DP... I think they should just go to wherever the guy is being held, and see if they can talk to him. I don't think they should actually leave him there without at least trying to find out something about him. But neither should they just rush in there to let the guy out. Although, I do wonder what kind of contraption this 'steel plate' is that he has over his mouth. Is it something that prevents him from talking, or a more Hannibal Lecter-esque type thing, to stop him from biting (eating, if he's a cannibal) people. Surely though, screwing something like that to a person head isn't proper practice to any professional in the law or otherwise, so I have to also wonder, who put the device on him. Could he possibly not be what he seems upon first reading. One automatically assumes he's going to be a super-violent criminal, but could he be the exact opposite? Maybe someone who knows something a little more sinister about this zombie situation maybe?
Either way, don't just rush off. Find out more about him, before resolving to just abandon him.
Fabulous Biz! I look forward to more!
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.... there is no religion without love, and people may talk as much as they like about their religion, but if it does not teach them to be good and kind to man and beast, it is all a sham....
Black Beauty by Anna Sewell, 1887
 
 
  
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PopeAlessandrosXVIII
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| Posted: Sat Jun 18, 2011 4:57 am Post subject: I Think....... |
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*Bows* Sorry it took so long to get to this. I hate RL some times... I really like this chappy. Very spooky!
I must say, I'm having a lil issue with the mood swing the girls seem to have taken. First it, don't trust anybody, now, they seem to have become the helpless maids most girls end up as in the horror genre. Need some fire back into their tudes! They souldn't be swallowing his crap so quickly.
I like the bike storage idea. Shows his dad may be a monster, but a smart monster. Love the line about his dad being the only guy who'd lock a door in an apocolyps. Very chuckle worthy!
DP......I'd try and find the guy's file. I mean, if he's a legit prisoner here, he'll have to have a file. With that mask in place, there is no garantie he'll be able to talk, so I say hunt down what you can find out about him in the squad file rooms before heading down to see the actuall man. I'd actually start with the creepy folder clutched in the dead guy's hand. Makes the most sense for me atm.
Loveing the end of the world here, keep up the good works!
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misterbiz
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| Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2011 7:29 am Post subject: |
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Now polling...because Bizzy is back, baby
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| Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2011 7:45 am Post subject: |
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Tough poll! A lot of good options - I assume we're just figuring out how to start so I picked according to that presumption. It wouldn't be where I'd want to FINISH per se but it was a good NEXT thing to do.
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CHAPTER 25: Near-Light Speed (NEW CHAPTER! (12/4/2011))
Zephyrrr! And...
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| Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 10:22 pm Post subject: Chapter 6 - The Rise of Subject L |
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A million and one thoughts flew around my skull as I stared at the screen. The most prominent being a simple question. How was this guy still alive? Half a dozen answers presented themselves but each one seemed as unlikely and improbable as the next. I took a step back but kept my eyes glued to the unchanging image on the monitor.
The prisoner was truly starting to creep me out. He was just standing there, staring up at the camera. It was as if he knew that we were looking at him. A small shiver rocketed down my spine as I stared at the figure in the cell. I managed to shake away the creeps that he gave me and looked to Ana, who looked back at me.
"Well, what do you think?" I asked her. She gave a shrug and let out a sigh.
"We can't just leave him in there to die," she said.
"Sh...sh...should be d...d...dead already," Rat commented.
"S...s....seven days. No food, n...n...no water. Should b...b...be gone."
I gave a nod in response then looked back to the monitor. They were both right. On one hand, he should be dead. His mouth was covered with a solid steel plate, held up by a good number of screws. There was no possible way he could be provided with sustenance, with the small exception of an IV. an idea that was quickly ruled out by the straight jacket. I studied him for a moment before my thoughts were interrupted.
"What you think, Silver?" Ana asked. I looked at him for a moment before looking at her as an idea popped into my head.
"I want to know more about him," I said. "You're right. We can't just leave him there. That would be quite inhumane but Rat has a valid point as well. If we go on worse case scenario, then he's been in there for seven days with no food or water. He should be dead or at least a lot worse for wear than what he is. So I would like to know just what we're getting into before we even consider letting him out of there."
"So, what did you have in mind? Look through the police files?"
I gave a nod. "Yeah. Me and Rat will go look through police files to see if we can find any special prisoners or anything about a guy with a steel plate on his skull. You stay here and keep an eye on him and give a shout if anything unusual happens."
I looked to Rat and watched as she smiled at me and started out of the room.
"Wait a minute," Ana said, as I started to follow. "Three things. First, who the fuck put you in charge? Second off, why should I be the one to watch the monitor? And last, what the bloody hell do you mean by unusual?"
I spun on my heel and stared her in the eye. Behind her brown eyes laid an good amount of dominance and defiance. A small smirk played across my face as I recognized them. She was starting to remind me a bit of myself. I cleared my throat and took a step toward her.
"Alright. I will answer those in order," I told her. "You did when I fixed your van and you agreed to help me get out of this wretched, vile place. You watch because Rat has a stutter and if something important happened, we may not have an idea what she's saying in order to stage a rescue or whatever. And I mean if the guy bursts into flames, if the building starts to collapse, or a giant tentacled creature tries to ravage you like in some crappy Japanese porn. Got all that?"
Ana's jaw dropped a bit and she gave a small and reluctant nod. My smirk grew and I pointed back to the monitors.
"You should probably get back to watching," I said before turning around and walking out of the room. I started down the hallway, heading in the direction of the file room but stopped as a thought popped into my head. They guy in holding had a steel plate on his mouth. I thought back to the folder in the evidence room The image on the front was the see-no-evil, hear-no-evil, and speak-no-evil trio, with the focus being on the silent one. My eyes widened and I raced down the hallway toward the evidence room. I slid to a halt outside the room and knelt down next to the corpse clutching the folder. For a moment, I just stared at it. After a couple minutes, I reached out and started to carefully pry the fingers up and slowly pull the folder from the cadaver's grasp.
After a short forever, I freed the folder and flipped it open. Inside was a photo of the mysterious man in the monitor wearing a hooded sweatshirt. Even thought the man in the picture did not have a steel plate on his mouth, it was still clear that it was the same man. I removed the picture and flipped through the other contents.
There were a couple lab reports from a company called Īnvierea Enterprises detailing experiments with the DNA of an individual deemed Subject L. I looked to the picture and smiled at it.
"Nice to meet you, Subject L. I'm Leon. How ya doin'?" I asked before chuckling to myself and looking back to the folder. I flipped through the reports and skimmed through them. The last one in the bundle was written a couple months ago. It said that all the experiments were a success and that they had found some way to cheat death. That they had found the secret to immortality. I looked back at the picture of the young man, my eyes focusing on the subtle smile that he wore. There was something wrong with it. I couldn't put my finger on it but I knew that there was something very off about it.
I put the photo and the reports back in the folder and stood up. I took a step into the hallway before stopping and looking down at my hand. My fingers were starting to tremble even more now. Slowly, I reached into my pocket and dug out the bottle of pills. I slid the folder under my arm and held it there while I screwed off the lid. I dumped a couple into my palm before tossing them into my mouth. Without thinking, I swallowed them. Without any liquid to assist their passage, it was a rough swallow but I managed to get them all the way down my throat and into my gut. I put the lid back on the bottle and stuffed it into my pocket.
Casually I strolled down the halls until I found the primary. Rat was frantically searching through a couple filing cabinets. With hurried, yet fluid motions, she'd pull out a file and flip it open. She would glance at them for a millisecond before flinging it to the side.
"Find anything?" I asked.
She didn't say a word. She merely shook her head.
"Well, I did. Let's get back to Ana then we'll see about releasing this guy."
The girl looked at me, smiled and moved quickly up to me. I smiled back at her and turned. Side by side, we walked out of the room and down the hall. As we approached the security room, I noticed something different. Ana was gone.
"Shit," I said and glanced around. I called out her name a couple of times before looking to the monitor. My eyes widened as I saw Ana standing in the room with the prisoner. Clutched in her hand was a small drill. I watched for a moment as she raised it and started to remove the bolts from the guys face. As I watched, I couldn't help but become worried. I listened to the air for a moment before swearing under my breath. I couldn't hear the drill, meaning that wherever she was, there was some soundproofing at work.
I looked around again before glancing at the monitor ad saw that he was still staring at the camera as she removed the bolts. Then I saw something that genuinely worried me of her safety.
Turning quick on my heel I ran out of the room. I ran as fast as I could into the cell block but saw no sign of her. Without stopping, I continued to race through the cell block until an idea slipped into my brain. There was a cell that they kept in the basement that was reserved for extreme prisoners. Friends of mine within the station had informed me of its existence. Turning, I sprinted back down the hall to the basement door, which was wide open. Kicking myself into high-gear to hurry up, I sprinted down the steps. Once in the basement, I ran down a long hallway that was waiting for me.
The sound of a drill started to make its way to my ears. I was close. Taking a deep breath, I sped up a bit more and stopped once I reached a large solid steel door that was several inches thick. Inside I saw, Ana pulling out the final screw and removing the steel from the man's face.
"Ana, wait," I shouted.
She dropped the steel to the floor and looked to me. "I couldn't just leave that on him any longer," she said. "What's your major malfunction?"
I looked to the stranger who was now smiling at me. There were several streams of dried blood sitting on his face. A low, evil chuckle emerged from his lips.
"Freedom," he said, in a deep and psychotic tone. The sound of tearing fabric tore through the air and in awe and horror, I watched as the straight jacket tore itself to shreds and removed itself from his person. Underneath the restrictive material was the same hooded sweatshirt he wore on the folder's emblem and in the picture inside. He put up his hood and another evil chuckle escaped his lips.
He stared at me for a moment before looking to the ground and folding his hands behind his back. "Your sister would be disappointed in your incompetence," he said.
A large amount of anger soared through me, now powered by adrenaline and painkillers, causing me to race forward and swing at him. Right as my fist was about to connected with his jaw, he ducked and allowed my fist to sail past him. Before I could fully comprehend what was happening, He rose and hit me with a nasty uppercut. A knee to the gut gut followed and was itself followed up by and elbow to the spine which sent me crashing to the ground.
"Hey, motherfucker," Ana shouted. I started to rise and looked over toward her to see her miss a roundhouse kick to the guy's skull which he dodged with another duck and countered with a fist to her knee. She let out a yelp of pain which was gut off as he uppercutted her as well before he grabbed her by the hair and threw her into a wall. He chuckled and started to walk out of the room. I managed to push myself off the ground and moved forward at him. As soon as I got close, he shot his leg back like a deranged mule and caught me right in the groin. The action was repeated as I doubled over and his boot caught me squarely in the face. As I hit the ground, I heard a yelp followed by a an odd choked gurgle and then a thud. I moved to a sitting position and looked in the hall where I saw an unmoving Rat. I glanced at Ana who was also unmoving. I pushed myself to my feet and looked at both the girls and around for the guy in the hood. I raced out of the room and looked around the hall, yet there was no sign of him.
I drew my gun and looked at my surroundings again. "Stupid. I should have just shot him," I groaned. i started to go farther down the hall to find him but stopped. The sound that Rat had made worried to me. There's no telling what he did to her. I should probably check on her. Then again, the guy in the hood couldn't have gone far. I could still catch up to him. Kill him. Get payback for that statement and what he did to the three of us.
I closed my eyes and thought for a moment and nodded as and idea came to mind. I knew what just what to do.
***********
What does Leon do? Should he check on Rat and make sure she's ok...again? Should he quickly run after their attacker? Check on both the girls and go with safety in numbers? It's your call folks.
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Tikanni Corazon
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| Posted: Thu Jun 30, 2011 5:48 am Post subject: |
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Another good chappie, Biz! Much enjoyed!
I spotted this...
| Quote: | | She let out a yelp of pain which was gut off as he uppercutted her as well |
cut?
But a very minor mistake.
As for the DP, go check Rat, and let the prisoner go. This guy is obviously too much for Leon to take on by himself, and we know from the file that he's possibly immortal. There's not much Leon is going to be able to do, so he should concentrate on his injured (or worse!) friend. Plus it might give even more insight into what the guy is actually capable of.
Great Job, Bizzy! Keep up the good work!
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.... there is no religion without love, and people may talk as much as they like about their religion, but if it does not teach them to be good and kind to man and beast, it is all a sham....
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| Posted: Thu Jun 30, 2011 8:26 am Post subject: |
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I'm gonna have to f5 Tika on all points. I thought to do the same on the DP as well. I'll add we should be a bit more thorough now on looking for info on the dude and how he got here. I know who you're speaking about now and I love the new intro piece for this character... wonderful stuff! Really brings a lot together for me. Can't wait for more!
Now... WHY did Ana go all off on her own like that??? This is something we need to figure out immediately-like. But first things first and that's tending to the wounds of our allies now that the immediate threat of combat has passed (but we should be making haste to an exit asap here... oh.. the more I think about it the worse this is... we may have to find an underground tunnel to make it out of here now... so search around a bit is a high priority too!)
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CHAPTER 25: Near-Light Speed (NEW CHAPTER! (12/4/2011))
Zephyrrr! And...
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| Posted: Thu Jun 30, 2011 12:39 pm Post subject: |
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This was EPIC, Bizzy!!
i'm with the others on this one. check rat...i dont like that sound either...
what i loved here, was the way you made that character just an overly creepy guy. i was getting chills!!
also, i loved the differences in the girls. Ana--the stubborn, reckless, walking attitude, and Rat--the quiet, sweet, graceful one. Rat is always smiling...i dont know that we've seen Ana genuinely do that yet.
keep it up Bizzy!!
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| Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 8:34 am Post subject: |
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| Cool! I expected him to wig out on us but he didn't go quite as psycho as I had thought he would. Maybe he's not all bad huh? I think we need to know why he's here - the real reason. And why he's alive.
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| Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2011 4:05 am Post subject: |
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Finally caught up, and glad I did.
Well, this guy some how knew he was being watched. He was staring up at the camera, and I believe somehow he managed to use that camera to persuade Ana to go down to the cell and free him.
He's dangerous, and we don't know the extent of his powers - except perhaps that he may be immortal - which we've already gleaned from the file.
I find it odd that he was not able to get out of the strait jacket until the steel plate was removed. Perhaps we'll find out why later?
At the moment I'd say he is a more dangerous threat than the shufflers. But... he didn't stop to kill the girls outright, he was more interested in getting out of there. I'd follow him. Not only that, he knows our hero, his sister, and probably his father, and that's dangerous, too.
If the girls are good enough to survive, then its safe to leave them, but if not, then there's not much Leon can do except watch them die. He's not got an emergency medical team there. If anything it might be better to lock them in the cell to protect them against shufflers while he goes after the nutcase.
Go after him.
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misterbiz
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| Posted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 6:50 pm Post subject: |
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Now polling...hit it fast people...Leon and the girls depend on you...vote now....vote fast
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| Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 8:35 pm Post subject: *Poke* |
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I can't wait to see mroe! I missed the DP suggestion time, which makes me sad....I would have suggested chaseing the guy and making friends with him!
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| Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2011 2:45 am Post subject: |
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Polling will stop on Monday...new chappie up Tues-Wed
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| Posted: Wed Jul 20, 2011 11:40 pm Post subject: Chapter 7 - "Not good...so not good..." |
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I looked down at Rat then turned my head to see Ana stumbling out of cell. I pointed down at Rat and glared at her. I was furious. She walked down into the den of an unknown psycho and we were all nearly destroyed by him. I looked dead in her eyes and continued to point at our comrade.
"Make sure she is alright, then take cover in the cell," I told her. She started to open her mouth but I moved a couple steps forward causing her to shut it and back up a step. "Don't speak. Not now. I'm going to get that son-of-a-bitch that you let loose. You're going to make sure that Rat is alright and then you're going to hide out in that cell til I come back. And you will not move, am I clear?"
She nodded and lowered her head in shame. I sighed and turned away from her. I quickly moved down the halls keeping, my eyes and ears open for any sight of him. Listening for any possible sound of his movements. I kept my gun held firmly in front of me as I weaved through the halls, prepared to blow away anyone that I saw. The halls led me back to the staircase which brought me once again to the cell block.
Moving through the cellblock, I didn't see or hear anything besides the usual silence. As I neared the lobby, I heard a sudden burst of psychotic cackling. The laughter echoed from around me. I spun around and stared down the cell block. Nothing. He was playing games with me. I didn't know who this guy was but he was starting to really piss me off.
With an angry grunt, I turned around and jumped back a step. Standing a couple feet in front of me was the creep in the hood. On instinct, I raised my gun and fired two rounds at him. The first round caught him in shoulder while the second sank into his chest, right where his heart should lie. Crimson blood sprayed back onto me from the wounds but the goon merely smiled.
"Guns are so barbaric, don't you think?" He asked before grabbing the barrel and pulling on it. Still stunned from the fact that he took two shots and was still standing, the gun slid easily from my grasp. He disassembled it in a couple of seconds and threw the pieces in various directions. "That's better. Now if you please, I must be on my way. He turned around and started to walk away.
After a few more moments of stunned staring, I hurried forward and spun him around. As he spun, he brought his fist around and caught me in the side of the head. My head was knocked to the side for a moment as he caught me with another blow to the opposite side of my skull. My head was thrown back to a neutral position. As my eyes focused again, I caught sight of his fist flying at me. Unable to fully comprehend what was happening, it connected and sent me straight to the ground.
The freak chuckled as I felt blood start to trickle from my nose. i laid there and listened as his footsteps moved away from me. After I managed to gather my senses, I pushed myself up and started to stumble down the hall to the lobby. As I entered, I looked toward the entrance and saw him. He let out a resounding chuckle before looking around at the chaos around him at the burned bodies and decomposing lumps with most of their skulls or torsos blown away.
"Alright, all of my mangled minions. Rise and slaughter this disgrace to his kind," he shouted. Their was a loud and collective moan from all around me as the burned and whither masses started to rise. All the bodies rose, with the exception of those that had put a bullet into their own brains.
All at once the shufflers started to stagger toward me. There were dozens of them. Instinctively, I reached for a gun to find nothing. My eyes bounced around the room as fear started to flood through me. Looking back toward the entrance, I saw no trace of the guy in the hood with the exception of a puddle of blood and what appeared to be two bullets.
"Not good," I said. "So not good. Shit. oh shit." Next to me, a shuffler let out a loud groan, causing me to spin and hit it with a solid punch to the side of its squishy skull. It staggered back and I followed up the move with a similar one that knocked it to the ground. Glancing to my other side I saw another one getting close. Reacting quickly, I spun and delivered a roundhouse kick to its skull. There was a sick crunch and the thing collapsed into a heap. Quickly I spun and raced into the cell blocks. A couple shufflers emerged and started staggering toward me.
I looked behind me and watched as tons of shufflers piled into the hall. Letting out a frustrated groan, I turned and raced down the stairs into the basement again. I needed a gun if I even wanted a chance at surviving. I raced back to the secret cell and saw Rat sitting against a wall holding her throat and Ana sitting by her and holding her close.
"We gotta move and now," I told them. "And I need a gun. Bastard took mine."
"What's going on?" Ana asked handing me a pistol from the bag of guns and pulled out hers.
"Lots of shufflers. Explain later," I said and started out of the room. I heard a moaning headed out of the cell. I started down the hall toward the staircase but stopped as a loud moaning greeted me. I shook my head and gestured toward another hall nearby. Ana and Rat emerged from the cell and started down the hall and I followed in tow.
Together we sprinted down the hall until it spit up in three directions. Down one end was a solid steel door with an electronic keypad next to it. Straight ahead of us as a set of double doors that sat under a sign that said garage. Finally down the last path was a large red door that was propped open by a dead body. Printed boldly on the door were the words: RESTRICTED ACCESS. DO NOT OPEN.
"Well, which way?" Ana asked. I looked around then over my shoulder as the sound of shuffling echoed from deep in the basements halls I looked at each door carefully trying to figure out the escape from the surefire death behind us.
***********
Ok...which door do they go through? The mysterious red door? The solid steel one? Just to the garage to try and get a ride out of there? or do they just turn around and try to fight their way back out? Choose wisely...
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Tikanni Corazon
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| Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2011 3:36 am Post subject: |
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Hey Biz!
Another great chappie! I'm glad that Rat is okay...at least for now. I was worried the guy had crushed her throat in the last chapter. I was also very intrigued by this line...
| Quote: | | Looking back toward the entrance, I saw no trace of the guy in the hood with the exception of a puddle of blood and what appeared to be two bullets. |
...I'm wondering what this signifies, whether he merely removed the bullets, or something more supernatural. I dunno, it just kinda struck me upon reading it.
Found a couple of things whilst reading...
| Quote: | | hide out in that cell til I come back. |
Till...
| Quote: | | The laughter echoed from around me. |
I'm not entirely sure, so someone else is going to have to confirm it, but the 'from' doesn't sound quite right here, though I definitely know what you mean by it. The the laughter is all around him and seemingy originless. I'm thinking it would sound better if you added or replaced it with an 'all'. Anyway, it could just be me, but I thought I would point it out anyway.
| Quote: | | i laid there and listened as his footsteps moved away from me. |
I...and possibly laid needs to be changed to lay, I'm thinking.
| Quote: | | There was a sick crunch and the thing collapsed into a heap. |
I think 'sickening' would sound better, but that could just be me again (hangovers do make these things a little hard to judge )
| Quote: | | Straight ahead of us as a set of double doors that sat under a sign that said garage. |
Was...
DP - I still want to know more, and the door that seems to scream 'INFORMATION' to me is the red 'restricted access' door, though the solid steel one is tempting. But, as it wasn't mentioned to be otherwise, I'm imagining that it is closed and that they will need some kind of password to type into the keypad to gain access anyway. As they're in a hurry, and don't want to become zombie nosh, I'm sticking with the red door.
Still enjoying this very much! Keep up the good work!
_________________
.... there is no religion without love, and people may talk as much as they like about their religion, but if it does not teach them to be good and kind to man and beast, it is all a sham....
Black Beauty by Anna Sewell, 1887
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| Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 3:07 pm Post subject: I Think....... |
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Sorry for the delay in reading this! *Bows* Life suxz royal atm, but the crazy guy here gave me the happy for a bit. *Grins*
I like this one. Not muche happend, but it still had a great feel to it. I think you could have done a little more with the 'happenings' durring it, but again, I like it this way too!
Needs a little work witht he disjointedness in some places, but the story comes through semi clearly even in the most confuseing points. Perhaps a re-read or two and you could catch those little slips.
DP....I agree about heading into the room, but I'd have to say, slip inside, but take out as many shufflers from behind the door before closeing the doors. Make sure to take out the dead body holding the door open, incase it wants to start shuffling *Shifty eyes*
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| Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 4:10 pm Post subject: |
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i love this, Bizzy. =)
great job. keep going!
ima say barricade yourself in the room & kill as many as possible.
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| Posted: Mon Jul 25, 2011 9:02 am Post subject: |
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I found a few new chapters I'd missed this morning, and much to my surprise, this was one of them! I've had a distracted go of it lately.
Anyhow, loving the tale as always. I found the same comment Tika pointed out just as intriguing... two bullets? But also two I thought the mention that only those that had not shot themselves in the head rose as shufflers to be interesting as well. Though I must insist you add something more to that to give us an understanding of how we came to realize this so easily. Sure some may not have risen but would we have so quickly realized it was because THOSE people had shot themselves?
As for the DP, I'm tempted to go for the restricted access door... sounds VERY interesting and like there's some good clueage there that could help us sort out one of our mysteries BUT survival is at stake and I'm thinking if it were ME I would feel a bit less comfortable running in that way rather than heading towards the garage. At least, in the garage, we may find an escape route and perhaps even a functional vehicle to bust free with!
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CHAPTER 25: Near-Light Speed (NEW CHAPTER! (12/4/2011))
Zephyrrr! And...
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| Posted: Sun Jul 31, 2011 5:06 pm Post subject: |
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Eternia is now polling
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| Posted: Sun Jul 31, 2011 5:23 pm Post subject: |
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The garage may seem safer but a Restricted Area? Too tempting!
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| Posted: Sun Aug 07, 2011 12:42 pm Post subject: |
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I'm glad I caught this one in time! A good chapter and I'm still taken in. I'm voting for the restricted access. There's info on this guy in this place and if we keep running, we'll be getting nowhere.
While we can't go back upstairs to get the file on him we may still learn more by going to the restricted area.
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| Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2011 7:26 pm Post subject: Chapter 8: Red Room Revelations |
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"Red door," I said pointing at it. Ana nodded and together, the three of us raced in its direction. I stopped in front of it as the girls jumped over the cadaver in the way. Carefully, I took aim at its skull and put two rounds into its grotesque gray matter, before grabbing it and dragging it out of the way. Once the body holding the door open was replaced by one of my comrades, I moved in and allowed them to slam it shut behind me. As the door closed there was a small clicking sound before several fluorescent lights kicked on above us.
I looked around and my jaw dropped slightly. The room was filled with monitors and filing cabinets. In the center of the wall in front of us was the same insignia I had seen on the folder upstairs with the words Īnvierea Enterprises in large print under it. I stared up at the large figure in the hood with a hand over his mouth. Something about it was quite disturbing yet very hypnotizing as well. Directly in front of the large, disturbing image was a pair of computers. Sitting in front of each one was an officer slumped over on the keyboards. Their blank and empty gazes directed at each other. Each one appeared to have been dead only a couple of days and had a single bullet wound in the back of their skulls
I moved forward a bit and glanced at the screens of the computers they were clearly looking at when someone executed them in theirs seats. On each screen was a spreadsheet with a list of names. Each name was accompanied by their height, weight, age, marital status and last known whereabouts. As I read each line of information I found something particularly odd about each one was at the end of each one was either the word Viable or Non-Viable. My eyes passed down several lines of names before I came to a name I recognized: Stefan "Doc" Bachman. My eyes raced toward the end of his line and found the word Viable there, typed in red letters.
"What the fuck is all this?" Ana asked behind me. I turned and looked at her.
"I don't have a clue," I told her. I started to say something else but was interrupted by something slamming on the door. On the other side, I could hear loud, vicious and hungry moans as the horde of putrid policemen clamored to get in and tear us into tiny bite sized pieces.
"Great," Ana moaned. "Now we're trapped in here."
"Yeah, we are. Something that could have been avoided had you not come down here in the first place," I said with a smirk.
"Woah, you can't possibly be thinking of blaming this on me," she said casting an shocked look in my direction. "You're the one who brought theses things down here.
"And you're the one who came down here and freed a psycho which you knew nothing about and let him go, so now there's a guy running around that can control the shufflers."
She let out a nervous laugh and shook her head. "Control them? Are you fucking high? No one can control these things."
"Well, I just watched him tell these things to rise and kill me and they got up and came after me. Something that wouldn't have happened had you waited like you should have. What were you thinking?"
Ana opened her mouth to say something but closed it and closed her eyes tight as if thinking extraordinarily hard about it. She opened her eyes after a moment and shook her head.
"I don't remember," she said. "I was just watching him on the monitor and then next thing I know, I'm going down the stairs. Grabbing the drill from next to the door and getting that steel plate off of his mouth. It was like someone else was making me do it."
I eyed her for a couple minutes, trying to figure out whether she was telling the truth or trying to save her own hide. As I studied her, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I looked over at Rat who rapidly thrust a piece of paper in my face. I grabbed it from her and eyed it carefully. It was an email from an individual named Emily to someone simply known as Bossman.
Complications arose with Subject L, it read. He has proven to be quite troublesome. Each of the men in charge of handling him have died in mysterious circumstances. All of the projects that you signed off on seem to be taking. This includes the hypnotic gaze, mental manipulation and psychokinesis. Extreme measures have been taken to prevent their misuse but things are still going downhill. We are going to house him at the Eternia Central Police Station. Even without you're OK, maybe they can keep him under control.
I reread it a couple of times then handed the paper to Ana. She took it and looked over it before staring back at me. I scratched my temple a bit and pointed at the e-mail in her hand.
"He got in your head," I told her. "Sorry about jumping down your throat like that." She didn't say anything and simply nodded. I looked to Rat and sighed. She was rubbing her throat lightly. "You alright?" I asked placing a hand on her shoulder.
She opened her mouth to say something but winced in pain. She pointed to her mouth and shook her head. For some reason, as the thought of Subject L's attack on us surface, I found myself becoming furious. But it was the thought of the attack itself that angered me. It was that he dared to lay a hand on rat. He had harmed her and that fact crawled under my skin and festered there. I quickly shook off the anger and looked around as I tried to figure out a way out of the tiny little room.
Before I could get any ideas though, I heard a small of static from the corner. My gaze shot in its direction and focused on a small CB radio that was sitting on one of the filing cabinets. Rat walked over to it and looked at it closer. After a moment, more static sounded from it before a voice started speaking.
"Please, for the love of God, if anyone can hear me. Please respond. I've been trapped for the last three days without food or water. I'm injured and in need of assistance. Please help me," A panicked voice said. It was female and a little bit nasally. I started toward the radio and stopped in front of it. The last time one of us offered help to someone, it blew up in our face.
"Do we answer it? Or is no one home?" I asked. Rat looked at me and shrugged. Ana walked up and stood beside me.
"Dunno. You're call, chief," she said.
"Oh. So, now I'm in charge?'"
"Yeah. Rat's too nice and I don't want to risk anyone else getting into my head."
I nodded and stared at the radio. "Please. Is anyone out there?" the voice asked. I lowered my head and tried to think about to do. We could answer her and promise her help but if we couldn't figure out an escape, we could be stuck just like her. I weighed every pro and con before looking back at the radio and knowing precisely what had to be done.
***********
What does he do? Answer the call? Smash the radio and ignore it? Ask for help himself? Something else I didn't mention? The trio's fate is in your hands...
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PopeAlessandrosXVIII
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| Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2011 7:39 pm Post subject: I Think....... |
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Another nice chapter! Loving the ever present tension of those damnd shufflers. The transition to "You" being in charge was quick, but necisary I suppose. y sister is kicking me at the moment over the fact that the girl is giving up the power, but she's just a stickler like that. *Mumbles*Damn femenisit*Mutter*
Let's see, what to do next. . . . .I'd say answer the radio, but don't give out any pertinent info. Lean as much as we can from her, and if she seems capable, agree to help. If not. . . . Tell her sorry, but we have our own problems! Well, that's my idea....
Loving this apocalyps Biz-kun! Keep up the spirits!
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Andolyn
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| Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2011 7:51 pm Post subject: |
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| i liked this! not much happened, but it was definitely a plot builder! i think we should answer...call me a tenderheart! but i think we should reach out. besides...we're stuck in a room with zombies at what we think is the only door...how much worse can it get?? right?? right? lol
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Lost Omega
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| Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2011 8:42 pm Post subject: |
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Finally, I'm all caught up. Great story biz! I suggest ignoring the radio. Let's be honest here. The lady is injured and would probably just slow the group down even more than it already is. Also, if she's trapped in the building, she may have had something to do with the zombies and the psycho which would just make us want to shoot her anyway. In conclusion... IGNORE HER AND RUN!!!
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Check out my SG, Freedom's Call! Chapter 4 - Part 2 is up NOW! In Skiffiville!
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Have you seen my ninja? He's around here somewhere... Qk
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Muaddib
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| Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2011 7:56 am Post subject: |
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| Like LostOmega, I finally caught up. A love a good zombie apocalypse caper. I say help whoever is on the radio. Right now, the gang needs all the help it can get otherwise they'll all probably get killed anyway. So the risk is worth it.
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Tikanni Corazon
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| Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2011 8:21 am Post subject: |
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Another great chappie Biz! Much enjoyed!
I'm glad that Rat's okay. I was worried that Subject L may have done some far more serious damage. Though I guess that if he's damaged her voicebox, it's going to be a problem for them later on anyway, what with her not being able to call for help, or warn them of danger. But still, phew!
Just spotted a couple of little things...
| Quote: | | For some reason, as the thought of Subject L's attack on us surface, I found myself becoming furious. |
surfaced ?
| Quote: | | It was that he dared to lay a hand on rat. |
Capital letter for Rat.
Okies, for the dp...My initial thought was that this was possibly going to be some kind of trap. Maybe the company making a regular check to see if Subject L and the company's records of their experiments have been discovered by anyone else. As such, I did have to take a little time to figure out what they should do, before finally coming to the conclusion that they should answer the woman anyway. She could be entirely innocent, and actually need help. She could also be a person who worked on the experiment (possibly the Emily who sent the e-mail), and who might know a way that they can get out. Or, she could be calling through on the radio for the reason I stated previously, in which case they might send people to capture/kill them, who in turn will probably kill the zombies, and then our trio might stand a chance of fighting their way out of the building, what with their opponents being human and more easily hurt.
Looking forward to the next chapter already, Biz! Keep up the good work!
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.... there is no religion without love, and people may talk as much as they like about their religion, but if it does not teach them to be good and kind to man and beast, it is all a sham....
Black Beauty by Anna Sewell, 1887
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| Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2011 7:10 pm Post subject: |
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An interesting reveal chapter.
My first thought, with the DP was, what does it really matter if we talk to this gal or not? We TOO are trapped and pretty much screwed. So to help her we need to first help ourselves OR she needs to help herself so she can come rescue us.
But hey, why not chat our way into oblivion with another poor soul who's just as screwed as we are? Perhaps we can work out a plan for survival between us.
As always, looking forward to more here Bizzy! Thanks for the great read!
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CHAPTER 25: Near-Light Speed (NEW CHAPTER! (12/4/2011))
Zephyrrr! And...
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misterbiz
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| Posted: Thu Sep 08, 2011 1:25 am Post subject: |
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Now Polling!
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| Posted: Tue Sep 13, 2011 10:34 am Post subject: Awwww...... |
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Awww, seems like my choice is in last place *Buuuuu* Well, at least I didn't tie it!
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| Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2011 3:45 am Post subject: Chapter 9 - Escape Escapades |
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Slowly, I reached out and grabbed the mouthpiece for the radio. I looked at the side for a moment before sighing and pressing the button on the side with my thumb. I waited for a moment before swallowing hard and looking to Rat who gave me an encouraging nod.
"Yeah. Someone is out here. You're not alone miss," I said before releasing the button. There was a torturous silence before there was an eruption of static from the radio.
"Oh thank god," the woman said, sounding on the verge of tears. Obviously the woman had been through hell if the sound of another voice brought her to that reaction. "Who is this? Where are you stationed? Is there any help on the way?" she asked. Her words erupting out of the radio a mile a minute.
"Call me Silver," I told her, opting for only my last name. Giving out my first name could be quite dangerous if this girl was an enemy. "And I'm stranded too. I'm stuck in a secret headquarters for Īnvierea Enterprises with a couple dozen or so shufflers on the other side of the door. And I doubt any help is coming for either of us."
"You're in the Red Room? How'd you get in?" the young woman responded.
"It was being kindly held open by a rotting corpse," I told her. "And what do you know about this place."
"Too much," she said. "There should have been two officers manning computers inside. Are they..." She trailed off a bit so I finished for her with a sigh.
"Dead? Yeah."
"Shit. That means that clean-up has started, she said. There was a slight sound of sniffling and a couple deep breaths. After the deep breaths there was a full minute of silence before her voice burst from the radio once more. "Ok, you need to get out of there and fast."
"Well, I'm open to ideas," I said with a laugh, looking around. "But there's only one door and too many things on the other side to get past."
"There's another exit. Behind one of the filing cabinets is a secret door that leads to a ladder. The ladder leads to the office of the chief of police. Hurry and use it. Then meet meat 557 Broadway. I'm stranded in a city bus with about a dozen creatures outside. Please, hurry."
"Wait. How do you know about this room? The exit?"
"Help me and I'll explain more," she said. Following her sentence was a loud burst of static followed by nothing.
"Hello?" I asked. Nothing. "Are you there? Please respond." Still nothing. "Come on in, over." Only silence came forth. It seeped past my ears and caused me to be filled with an uncontrollable rage. With a frustrated growl, I grabbed the radio and yanked it off of the filing cabinet and flung it against the wall. "Fucking bitch," I shouted. Quickly, I tried to shake off my fury.
The painkillers were settling in. They had a nasty habit of shortening my temper. Even though, had I not taken any before we got trapped here, I most likely would have shot the blasted thing. I looked at the girls who were staring at me in confusion and a mild state of worry. Before I could get rid of the anger that fueled me, I pointed at the filing cabinet that appeared to be the most likely suspect. The only one in the entire room that was gray instead of black.
"You heard her," I snapped. "Now move the fucking thing."
The girls looked at me for another moment before nodding and moving to the filing cabinet. As they turned their backs I pulled the pills from my pocket and took some from the bottle. Maybe with a couple more, I could contain my emotions. Prevent any more sudden outbursts. I had to keep my cool. The girls have made me their leader. I was responsible for them. And I'd be damned if I let any harm come to them. Casting a glance over my shoulder at Rat, I popped the pills into my mouth, capped the bottle and slid it back into my pocket.
I turned around and watched as the girls managed to move the cabinet. As it moved the one next to it moved as well and with remarkable ease. Like they were connected on a set of wheels. Sure enough, in the wall where the steel had sat was a small door. Ana moved toward it and pushed it open with only a minimal struggle. As the woman on the other end of the radio had said there was a metal ladder within.
"Well, this place is full of surprises, isn't it?" I said.
"What the hell was going on here?" Ana asked. "I mean, cells with super-powered freaks, secret company labs, secret passages, it all seems like something out of a bad video game."
"If only," I said. "Well, I guess that since you made me group leader that I'll head on up first." A deep and nervous sigh escaped my lips as I walked toward the secret passage. I stopped directly in front of it and looked at Rat. I smiled at her in apology for my previous actions before stepping into the claustrophobic tunnel. The passage with the ladder was little more then a cement square with red lights going up each side and just enough room for one to maneuver properly on the ladder. With fear filling my heart quickly, I began my ascent. The sound of my shoes on the rungs of the ladder echoed around me, making me feel very uneasy. Below me, I heard the others start up after I had reached a good thirty or so rungs before them.
After what seemed like a good two hundred rungs, the ladder stopped at a wooden door above me. I pushed on it and with ease it flung open. Sure enough, as I finished crawling up into the open, I found myself in the Chief's office, emerging from the door that sat under his desk. Looking around the office, the first thing that caught my eye was the deceased body of the chief, sitting in the corner. The hilt of a knife sticking out from the top of his skull. I moved halfway toward him and stopped. He was fresh. A day at the most.
"Hey, Chief," I said, giving him a slight wave. "How ya doin' tonight?" I waited a beat before giving a nod. "Glad to hear it. I've been alright. This has been one hell of an Armageddon though."
"Who the hell are you talking to?" Ana asked behind me.
"Chief Augustus," I responded. "Though he's not much of a talker now."
Ana moved to my side and gasped. "Holy fuck," she said.
A minute later and Rat was at my other side. She stared at the body for a moment before walking to it and pulling the blade out of the head. The knife was fairly long, a good six or seven inches. The blade was serrated and etched in the side of it was and IE. A large smile appeared on her face as she eyed it. There was a bright gleam in her eyes like a child at Christmas.
"Great," Ana said. "You got yourself a new blade. Can we get the fuck out of here already. This place is starting to creep me out."
I nodded and headed toward the door. The chief's office led to a flight of stairs that took us down two floors to the main lobby on the first floor. As we exited the stairwell, a strange sight greeted us. Five individuals in leather jackets stood there conversing in a small circle, each one carrying an improvised weapon of some sort. I counted two baseball bats, a tire iron, a police baton and a large board with a nail stuck through it. Clearly my father's men. A fact that was explained by the leather and lack of intelligence to bring guns.
I started toward them, raising my gun but a soft touch met the back of my shoulder. From behind me, Rat came around with a look of anticipation on her face. From my other side, I felt a small tap and turned to look at Ana.
"She's got this. Just sit and enjoy the show," she said. Looking back to Rat, I watched as she started toward the bikers. Ana let out a whistle and the five of them turned in our direction.
"That's them. The runt and his bitches," the one with the tire iron said.
He charged forward with his friends bringing up the rear. Mr. Tire Iron swung his weapon but Rat dropped to her knees and placed the blade firmly in his gut. He gasped in pain and in a flash, she shot up again, bringing the blade up and giving me a good glance at what his insides looked like. She withdrew her weapon and he dropped in time for one of the batting twins to appear with the wooden weapon raised above his head. Without hesitation, she jammed the blade in his throat and grabbed the bat as he slumped to the floor. In a single, fluid, beautiful motion, she spun and brought the bat up to greet the balls of the other bat boy. He clutched himself just in time for Rat to send the bat into his skull.
The thug dropped to the floor along with Rat's bat. Rat rolled to the side as the board came down in her direction. It hit the floor as Rat pulled the blade from the other felon's throat. She spun on her heel, her blonde hair forming a large halo, before she pounced and sent the man to the floor. The biker let out a startled yelp that was cut short as Rat's steel dragged across his throat. Rat stood and thrust her blade hand out just in time to have it sink into the arm of the criminal with the police baton. He screamed in agony dropped his weapon and backed up with the knife still in his arm. Rat grabbed the discarded baton and used it to crack open his head and send him to the floor.
"Where the fuck did she learn to do that?" I asked, as my eyes widened. The events I just witnessed finally sinking in.
"That's for us to know and for you to maybe find out," Ana said with a playful smile. She flashed me a wink and started toward Rat, patting her on the shoulder. I stared in stunned silence a moment longer before joining them.
"Well, let's go," I said heading toward the door.
"Wait," Ana said. I stopped and turned to face her. "Don't you think we should find another way out. Just in case they have friends out there."
"They aren't that smart. Besides, we need our bikes. Broadway is on the other side of town."
"Wait, you're actually thinking of meeting her."
"Yeah. I think maybe we could try to figure what the fuck is going on here," I said taking a step forward and pointing in the direction of the basement. "Because I may not be in the law enforcement business. Hell, far from it, but I know enough to know that that shit wasn't natural."
"Who gives a flying fuck?" Ana yelled back stepping closer, closing the distance between us. "You said you had a way out of this godforsaken city. That's all I care about. Escape. Yet, now all you wanna do is play detective."
"Yeah. I kinda wanna know what was going on with the cops, Īnvierea, and Subject L. I wanna know what they have to do with happened to this shithole. But most importantly, I think that if he have any intention on getting out, we may need all the help we can get. Besides, she's a survivor stranded by shufflers. I kinda feel for her."
Ana leaned up to say something else but was stopped as Rat pushed her way between us and gave each of us a slap in the face to signal us to stop. I looked at her embarrassed and sighed as I tried to figure out the best course of action.
***********
What do they do? Front door or try to find another exit? Go with the original plan and visit Doc? Save the girl and get answers? seek out Senior and get payback for the goons? Something I didn't suggest?
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Andolyn
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| Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2011 9:32 am Post subject: |
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it's AAAALLLWAYS the quiet one. XD
loved the play by play of that scene...definitely something i need to work on with my battles. now i have a good example. =)
i'd say lets go with Leon's original plan and go find this lady. she can obviously give us some answers...if she's still alive...
keep up the good work, Bizzy! i loved it!
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Tikanni Corazon
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| Posted: Mon Sep 19, 2011 9:31 am Post subject: |
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Another fab chapter, Biz! I never fail to enjoy this tale!
A couple of things I noticed...
| Quote: | | "Shit. That means that clean-up has started, she said. There was a slight sound of sniffling and a couple deep breaths. |
Needs another set of speech marks after 'started', and an 'of' between 'couple' and 'deep'.
| Quote: | | Then meet meat 557 Broadway. |
Space between 'me' and 'at'.
| Quote: | | The girls have made me their leader. |
I think this should be 'had', rather than 'have', going by the rest of the paragraph.
| Quote: | | But most importantly, I think that if he have any intention on getting out, we may need all the help we can get. |
We?
For the DP...Hmmm...I am tempted to say go find the girl, and help her. But I still have this horrible feeling that she's going to end up being the enemy. Curiousity is on the side of that option, as is the instinct to not go. It's almost like when you're watching a horror movie, and you're begging the victim to not go into that room because there's a killer in there, but yet a part of you is still egging them on. *giggles*
I'll go with that anyway, same as Andi. Go find the girl, but be well prepared for her to not be all that she seems.
Looking forward to chapter 10, Biz! Keep up the good work!
_________________
.... there is no religion without love, and people may talk as much as they like about their religion, but if it does not teach them to be good and kind to man and beast, it is all a sham....
Black Beauty by Anna Sewell, 1887
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