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#1: Down the garden Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2006 8:05 pm
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Chapter 1-A noise
All teenagers were playing on Atmosphier(nightmare). A video-board game, in the living room.

"Oh no! I'm banished!"

"Lets cheat." whispered one of them.

"O.K. You take the blue keys i'll take the red ones."

They carried on playing the game. The Gate keeper banishing them, releasing them, calling them maggots and so on.

CRACK.

"What was that?"

"Hot chocolate for everyone!" came the voice of Darren's mum.

"YEY!!"

"WOOO HOT CHOC!!"

"I always burn my self on that. but it's still nice....mmmm. hot choc."

"Shut up Maria!"

"MUUUUUUM!!!! Ashley's being nasty!!!"

"Oh, why can't you cousins behave?"

"Mum. We're cousins. What do you expect?" said Darren as if his mum was stupid.

CRACK....CR.....ACK......CRICK.....CRACK!!!!

"Mum! there is something down the garden!!!"

"It's next doors dog! Now stop the nonsense! I told you you shouldnt have let Anna play that game with you. I said it would scare her!"

All of the teenagers and Anna sat drinking their hot chocolate.

"Just 'cos she's a baby!" said Michle and everyone laughed. Anna immediately burst into tears.

BANG--CRACKLE--CLING!

"What the hell was that?!!" asked Darren his head snapping around to look out towards the garden.

"I bet they let that dog loose into our garden so that it can go to the toilet again!" said Darren's and Maria's mum.

"Stupid neighbours!" said Darren.

"OI! We'll have less of that!" said his mum. After a pause and silence, "Stupid neighbours."

Then they all ignored what they heard and went back to their hot chocolate before it was time for bed.

O.K. A new one there. What do you think the sound should be?

Last edited by tramp in a storm on Mon Jul 10, 2006 11:30 am; edited 9 times in total

#2: Author: LordoftheNight, Location: Hell

Posted: Sun Feb 19, 2006 11:33 am
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a daemon summonded from the underworld to wreck havoc and make sacrifices in the name of it's unholy master

and it has a secret plan to destroy humanoty when the rituals work successfully

#3: Author: Shady Stoat, Location: England

Posted: Sun Feb 19, 2006 12:53 pm
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A guardian of some sort, sent to warn them of the powers of evil that are coming for them. They have to run away. NOW!

Intriguing start. I like it Smile

#4: Author: Chinaren, Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com

Posted: Sun Feb 19, 2006 4:49 pm
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The ghost of someone buried in the garden.

A few typos in this one Storm!

#5: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 11:03 am
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Nice ideas! Very different. Keep them comming. Thumbs Up

Thanks stoat!
And thanks chinaren I'll check through it and see what i can correct. If i still miss anything out please feel free to correct me. Very Happy

Not gonna improve if i dont make mistakes Wink

#6: Author: Solomon Birch, Location: England..... but Japan beckons.....

Posted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 3:20 pm
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'Naibour' should be 'neighbour'

That's the only major one I noticed. Other than that, good start.

Now, for the noise... How about a three-toed monkfish warrior from the alternate dimension Mauna-Fizal'Ik'ubob 3. Who's looking for his long lost brother who he thinks might be buried somewhere in her garden. :biggrin:

#7: Author: Chinaren, Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com

Posted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 5:28 pm
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Well...

Cheet is spelled Cheat

emedietly is immediately

You need some apostrophies in there as well in various places. They are used when something belongs to something;

EG: Chinaren's hat. See if you can find where to put them! Wink

#8: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2006 1:51 pm
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Done! Very Happy

Thanks you lot! I hope i got all of them:) I'll try to get less next time

Quote:

emedietly is immediately

Its the doublkes again!!! they're out to get me!!!aaarrgggh!!!!

In year 7 my English teacher said that he had never seen anyone get their doubles so mixed up in his life!! lol. But I'm better now. Very Happy

#9: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 12:52 pm
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O.K. I've decided to use this story as sort of like a storygame experiment. It will be a normal storygame apart from the polls. I will write the ideas down on a pice of paper (or on word) and letter them. In the poll i will put the letters. You have to vote for any letter you like and let the destiny of the story take its course.

The idea matching to the letter with most votes will be the idea i use.

Any questions just ask. And please comment on how you like the new idea of storygaming.

#10: Author: Phang, Location: Phang's House of Mints

Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2006 8:38 am
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Random destiny - oooh.

#11: Author: Vampireidiot, Location: You don't want to know

Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2006 9:04 am
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Hey storm, good first chap.
Atmosphere rocks!!! man, that games funny
the idea where we select randomly, is also good. This should be great fun :biggrin:

#12: Author: Solomon Birch, Location: England..... but Japan beckons.....

Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2006 10:17 am
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Yeah, should be good to at least trial the idea. Well done Storm for bringing some more inventivness to the Skiffy/Horror section! :biggrin:

#13: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 11:46 am
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Thank you very much everyone.

And Vamps, or Phang? A little question here: Have we ever actually finished that game? I mean as in actually played it all the way through from the begining 'till the end without cheating or throwing all the pieces around the room, and yes......also without playing barbie dolls with the cards and keys.....(I would never do that! especially not while watching the perverted Phantom of the Opera Halloween H2O!) Laughing

Poll goes up! *fingers crossed...ok uncrossed cos i cant type!*

#14: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 11:58 am
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I've muddled them all up. Now even I've forgotten what sugestions are what letters. I've got it all written on XL. But I wont look And I'll keep my votes this time round in case i need to brake a tie. Very Happy

Good Luck to all of us Wink

#15: Author: Vampireidiot, Location: You don't want to know

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 12:51 pm
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Well i've voted for B.
And storm, in answer to your cool question, I have played it all the way through once with you guys, and once with alode of adults because it was christmas...though they were drunk and didn't know what they were doing, but still great fun!

Well, good luck on this, it should be interesting...( ooh i wonder what B is!!) :biggrin:

Can we find out what they all are when the poll is over? to see what we could have voted for?

#16: Author: LordoftheNight, Location: Hell

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 2:39 pm
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i went for A, because i've always had a connection with that letter, and i

i dont need to explain myself to you

#17: Author: Solomon Birch, Location: England..... but Japan beckons.....

Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 1:00 am
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I hope my three-toed monkfish warrior was in there somewhere.... Wink

Voted for C. Very Happy

#18: Author: Shady Stoat, Location: England

Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 1:04 am
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Welll.... I agonised over this one - I really did.

B and C were obviously the wrong choices, but D sounded like it might work. Still, I liked the sound of A. Choices choices!

In the end, I decided to be practical and just close my eyes and click around until I got a random letter Wink

#19: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 1:51 pm
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....calms down...sorry laughing again....Anyway!
Yes you will all get to see what the other choices were.

#20: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 1:04 pm
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Letter C it is! and letter C is.......*drum roll*.........*more drum roll as i look for XL and the answer*.........................

A DEMON SUMMONED TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!! I'll be doing the next chapter....ah might as well do it now Very Happy

#21: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 1:37 pm
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WARNING: This story from now on may contain the words Dick and Fanny. But in this story they are used as names. Do not get offended, they are real names and is used in childrens books written by Enid Blyton (and no i havent read anymore of the Famous Five i gave up on book 11 when i got hold of Darren Shan books.lol)
Chapter 2= Nightmares and Demons.

"Good night mum!"

"Good night Aunt Fanny."

"Good night sweetheart."

"Goodnight mummy!"

"Goodnight darling."

"What time is Uncle Richard coming back?"

"Late, Ashley, Late." she sighed and all 5 children went to bed.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The front door slammed shut. Anna jerked up straight. She had been edgy all night and slept with one eye open. Daddy never slams the doors. He knows we're in bed. she thought.

There was heavy breathing downstairs that could be heard all the way up fron the girls room. Anna hid under her bed covers leaving a tiny gap to peek through and breathe through.

"Dick?" Came her mums voice. That was uncle Richard's nick-name.

"Do you think so honey?" came a deep voice.

That's not daddy. thought Anna. then her mother screamed. A high pitched gurgly scream. then a whimper so qiet Anna could hardly hear it. It sounded like "please, not the children. Take me instead!"

"Richard was no good to me. Why should you be?"

"But he's older than me."

"But he is healthier than you. You have a cold that's been going for months. Besides Maria's sister is pretty. I can strike a deal with another demon. She will pay alot of energetic souls for beauty."

"No!" screamed Aunt Fanny. "Leave them alone!"

"Look, lady; My master needs souls full of energy to take over the world. Each sould makes him stronger. Got it?"

"Then why dont you take someone elses souls?" Then Anna heard a slap and her mum screaming. What should I do?

Last edited by tramp in a storm on Wed Mar 08, 2006 1:56 pm; edited 2 times in total

#22: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 1:50 pm
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A bit of extra info here:

O.K. we have:

Anna Nomed-10 years old

Maria Nomed-14 years old

Darren Nomed- 16 years old.

Their cousins are

Michel and Ashley Retsam are twins and they are both 15 years old.

#23: Author: Shady Stoat, Location: England

Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 1:51 pm
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Wake the other kids up and go and sneak a peek at what's happening downstairs.You can always run if - I mean, when - it gets scary and Aunt Fanny is killed Smile

#24: Author: LordoftheNight, Location: Hell

Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 3:36 pm
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Yes - the right option won.

Even if I didn't vote for it - or did I?

#25: Author: Chinaren, Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com

Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 5:56 pm
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Indeed! Good old names! Mind you it could be worse. I had a manager called Michael Hunt once, but he liked to be called Mike. Really.

Anyway, run away, wake the others quickly, and continue running away! Very Happy

#26: Author: Vampireidiot, Location: You don't want to know

Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2006 8:30 am
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Yeah, wake the others and take a peek then run away. Lol
I could be entertaining for the kids to see a demon :biggrin:

#27: Author: Phang, Location: Phang's House of Mints

Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2006 8:34 am
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I'm F5ing everyone else about the demon-watching. Cool

#28: Author: Solomon Birch, Location: England..... but Japan beckons.....

Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2006 10:10 am
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Short but good chapter.

Few typos:

Quote:

Do you think sp hunny?

I think this should be so. And should 'hunny' be spelt like that? I know that's probably how it sounds.... just wondering, ignore me... Wink

Quote:

been going fo months

This should be for.

I think that the little girl will try and run in to help her mummy, no matter how scary the voice sounds. And that way, we get to see the deamon! :biggrin:

*holds breath* Shocked

#29: Author: LordoftheNight, Location: Hell

Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2006 10:31 am
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I think honey is spelt the same way as the spread.

#30: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Wed Mar 08, 2006 1:58 pm
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Thanks you lot. I'll put up a poll soon. But i think we'll get to go demon spotting no matter what happens. lol.

But now, its bed time! lol.

#31: Author: Vampireidiot, Location: You don't want to know

Posted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 6:18 am
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Is there any chance we can see what we could have voted for, like they do on them game shows. This is what you could have won!!! LOSER!!! *does loser sign*, they are so sad rofl like me! :biggrin:

#32: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Wed Mar 15, 2006 5:08 am
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Polls up!

#33: Author: Solomon Birch, Location: England..... but Japan beckons.....

Posted: Wed Mar 15, 2006 6:04 am
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Voted!

*holds breath* Shocked

#34: Author: LordoftheNight, Location: Hell

Posted: Wed Mar 15, 2006 3:55 pm
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Went to wake then take a peek - kids are always curious

Voted, and winning.

#35: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 9:23 am
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OK people new chapter up soon. So far it looks like we wake everyone up and go see whats going on. But keep the votes coming.

#36: Author: tramp in a storm, Location: You never know...I could be in YOUR dust bin.

Posted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 3:22 pm
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You can breath now soily! sorry. Smile

Chapter3= Demon! -part one

Anna stood at her bedroom door listening. What should she do? was this just a joke? a dream? No. Everything sounded real.
She tiptoed over to Marias bed and stook her gently.

"Maria? wake up. please wake up, Maria. Help." she whispered. Maria awoke with a grunt.

"What is it?"

"Listen."

Maria listened. and sure enough she heard the voices down stairs.

*~*~*~*

"Jasmine is pretty. I need her. I can trade her for an unimaginable award."

"Leave her out of this!" screached Marias mum.

*~*~*~*

Maria gasped. Jasmine was her older sister. She was 21 and lived with her boyfriend. Last year she had to face a Demon looking for beauty. The Demon was defeated but its master wasnt. Maria, Jasmine and their parents were the only ones who knew about this. And ofcourse Darren, being her older brother had to fight.

"Maria, I'm scared." said Anna.

"Look Anna. You have to understand. There are sertain facts you have to accept and put up with them. And when i tell you, you will not start to cry. Understood?"

"Yes." said Anna her voice small and full of fear.

"Look. Anna. Demons are real. Demons are usually controlled by Demon Masters. But it isnt all to do with magic. The real demon world is a micture of magic, science, superstition and so on. Even stories can come to life sometimes. Jasmine had to defeat a demon on her 20th birthday. I will explain to you about that later though.

Right now we have to get out. Because if I'm right the Demon down stairs is one serving a Demon Master called Yegren. If you rearange his name it it Energy. He seeks energy to take over the world and blah blah blah."

"What does this have to do with us?"

"Anna. We are children. We are the most energetic living things that these monsters can get their hands on. Now I want you to wake the boys. Climb through the cupboard and to the back there is a door leading to their room. Wake them and tell them that Yegren is on the move and that he has a Demon down stairs."

Anna did as she was told. She fought her tears back so badly, bless her. She had a knot in her throat and she trembled with fear. But she had to do as she was told. Maria was older, wiser and knew about this. Anna had just stopped believing in magic and now she has to start all over again.

Maria got her bag that was under her bed just incase anything like this ever happened again. She had tinned food in there and bottles ready to be filled with drink. Every few days she would put in fresh bread and she had just put in a new loaf this morning. Now she was ready to go.

She climbed in the wardrobe and picked up a bag that contained clothes and things. Then she entered the boys room through the back. All they had to do now is see who they're up against, try save their mum if needed and run. Run for their dear little lives.

Last edited by tramp in a storm on Mon Mar 20, 2006 2:03 pm; edited 1 time in total

#37: Author: Chinaren, Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com

Posted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 3:25 pm
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Quote:

Run for their dear little lifes

Lives.

Yes, run. Run very fast!!

#38: Author: LordoftheNight, Location: Hell

Posted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 4:23 pm
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Running sounds good to me.

Of course - so does staying and becoming daemon munchies. In fact - that does sound more appeasing.

#39: Author: Shady Stoat, Location: England

Posted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 9:10 pm
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Definitely run. Run as fast as the gingerbread man Very Happy

#40: Author: Vampireidiot, Location: You don't want to know

Posted: Sat Mar 18, 2006 1:18 am
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lol, run run as fast as there little legs can go! :biggrin:

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