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Chapter 4- Finally!
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Posted: Fri May 20, 2005 10:46 am    Post subject: Chapter 4- Finally!  

I am very sorry for the length of time this has taken to finish. It has been roughly edited but I figure for the amount of time you ahve waited, I took nothing out. So it's a long one! I hope you enjoy it!

Story so far: Talon and his crew are crossing the lands of the southern Island, helped by a map they recieved from Shota the Witch Woman. Dumpling had been a forward scout and suddenly vanished from his leash, errrrr... security harness. We opted to split forces and send a rescue party for Dumpling.

“I will find him,” Honest said firmly, “And I’ll take this one in the red with me.”

“Are you sure?” Talon asked. He was not fighting her but Honest was touched by his concern. She often believed he didn’t realize exactly what she was.

“Of course Talon, I know these creatures better than anyone here. Who else will know what to do?”
“You are right as usual,” Talon gave in. “We will continue on to the Dead City and see what we can find there. Perhaps there will be a clue to where the treasure is located.”

“I shall meet you there before morning,” Honest said touching his cheek. Talon was having a hard time with this but he would not hold her back. Honest longed for the day when she could watch a sunset with him without wearing pounds of the heavy cream. Honest then addressed the crew, “Ghosts and spirits can not harm you. Show them no fear; else they will hang around scaring you for nothing more than a laugh. Beware the specters and more solid haunts though. While many of them are normal people who simply never realized they were dead, some of them have evil intentions. Stick with Talon, I have no doubt he can pull you through anything.”

Honest laid a smile then upon the suddenly embarrassed captain. Who could only shuffle his feet. Then Honest turned to the red shirted man and pointed, “You come with me.”

With that Honest walked off, sticking with the shade and being followed by a very nervous crewman. Talon watched her leave then turned to his crew.

“Alright me hearties, lets be moving afore the sun gets too far down.”

Talon turned and walked a few steps before he realized no one was following him. He turned back to see his crew hugging, and blowing their noses.

“That was a touching moment, Captain,” Dennis said in a way of explanation.

Talon rolled his eyes and stalked off towards the city of the dead.

*
Honest followed the footsteps easily, although the man in the red shirt was having a hard time keeping up. The trees had grown dense enough here for Honest to move freely. The sun was barely a candle in the shadows here, and Honest knew her original suspicions had been correct. The Footprints were most likely made by the pudgy seaman himself. Her biggest question was why?

She looked back down the path to see the man in red lumbering along, two hours had passed since she had left the crew behind and the sun was beginning to dip lower. If she did not find her quarry soon, the man in red would become a hindrance. As much as she hated feeding on Talon’s crewmembers, she had brought this one along in case she needed a snack. He was naïve enough not to argue with her, yet intelligent enough to help should she actually need him. Honest could not lead like Talon could. Raised by vampires where they usually dominated their slaves through their own powers or through brute strength. Honest had learned a better way through her Captain, but she had no practice at his form of leadership. So she paused and waited for the red shirted man to catch up.

“Do you need water or to rest?” Honest asked, trying her hardest not to sound disappointed or upset.

“Aye, if I could sit for a minute or two,” he replied, literally falling onto the ground.

“Do so, I will scout ahead a bit and return shortly,” Honest replied.

The red shirted man had a name, although at the moment he was too tired to remember it. He had been given the shirt as part of his test with the crew. This had been a surprise to him for no one really liked him on the ship. He wasn’t a sailor; he had no idea what a stern was or how to tie an anchor knot. He couldn’t stop giggling whenever someone said the word “dinghy” in his presence. He had been a lawyer on the mainland, and a not very nice one at that.

He had been on board the Scurvy Bottom for six weeks when the crew gave him the shirt. He was running from an enraged group of elderly women whom he had lawfully taken life insurance policies out for. They had signed the agreement after all, although he would grant they had no idea what they were signing after he had reworded it in Latin, Greek, Swahili, and hieroglyphics. But this shirt made him someone with the crew. He wore it proudly, as a symbol to his…

The blow to the head came swiftly but it did little damage. The man in red looked around and saw behind him a person dressed in the various shady colors of gray. A sword handle poked over his shoulder and the face was masked behind more gray cloth. The eyes were clear however; deadly calm green eyes peered at him through slits. He had seen one of these before, at a ball thrown by the emperor of one of the Asian countries. At once the red shirted man’s eyes opened with a gasp.

There was nothing more than a slight hiss as the sword cleared its sheath. The deathblow would have been quick, and fatal, if the red shirted man had not fainted first and fell back. Honest saw the man fall and felt relieved that she would not have to kill him. But the person in gray stumbled oddly after his swipe with the blade, a ninja-to as Honest remembered them being called. The blade, the clothing, the menacing silent movements, all pointed Honest to the fact that the man was a ninja. Which could only mean one thing.

“Black Jack,” Honest whispered to herself. Black Jack was the most feared pirate in the known world, as ruthless and cunning as he was ugly. Black Jack was the pirate that gave them all a bad name. He raped, pillaged, plundered, and murdered with no reservation and often for nothing more than to watch other people squirm. This had to be his assassin, a ninja by the name of Mercury.

Honest watched as Mercury sheathed his blade then looked around as if he sensed someone watching. Being a vampire gave Honest more advantages than disadvantages though. Even when she dropped to the ground, her movements were as silent as the grave. So her surprise was genuine when the gray clad assassin flicked his hand and released a metallic many-pointed disc at her. Honest flicked her own hand in defense and swatted the thing away.

“You must be Mercury,” Honest said as she glided forward, impressed that he had not been caught off his guard. He looked at her strangely, as if he did not understand her. “HA! Don’t try to pull the language barrier with me, I know who you are and who you work for.”

“I am not Mercury woman, I am his student, sent to recover the Family Jewels of Misty Moor.”

“Then we have a problem, I am Honest, first mate and right hand to Talon the One-eye. We too are here to collect the Family Jewels.”

“A woman aboard his ship? This will be easier than I thought.”

Honest smirked, the sun had finally set behind the jungle trees, and it was approaching night. The night was hers.

*
With an earth-rumbling chorus of bloodthirsty screams they entered the City of the Dead. Pirates, two entire crews pouring into the city streets as if they had been funneled directly from the sea. Neat and horrifyingly ordered groups split perfectly at the gap of the town and prepared their torches to begin the true chaos that made pirates so feared. For in the cacophony of burning buildings, screaming women and children, dying men, and rushing feet, a pirate was at home. And these sea dogs were good.

In only a few heartbeats the crew had surrounded a good portion of the city, effectively blocking the main road. A cannon appeared at the mouth of the road and the cannon crew expertly aimed and prepared to fire, the torch only hairs away from the fuse.

Then as swiftly as they had come, silence descended, only the haunting screams and yells echoed into the coming night.

“Not bad crew!” Talon shouted, moving his way forward. The ghosts would reset themselves in a few moments and they would be able to run the drill again. They were getting better every run. Talon was excited about giving them a real pillaging experience! “Dennis, when you split make sure you have your gunners in the front, if they need to shoot they can drop to a knee so they don’t end up shooting one of your team. Cutter, nice work with the cannon! How many can you set up that quickly?”

“Aye Captain!” Cutter shouted back.

“How many can you set up that quickly?!” Talon repeated. Cutter had been working with cannons since he was a boy; his hearing had suffered badly for it.

“Aye sir lots of booty!”

“HOW MANY…. Ahh never mind.” Talon waved it all off.

“Me thinks I can set about three of these if ye’d be likin’ Cap’n,” Cutter suddenly shouted. “Not sure if that be something ye might hold an interest in.”

Talon only waved and turned to the third crew. “Ernie, nice work. How are the two crews holding together?” Ernie had been the first mate on Malinor’s ship and Talon had left his rank intact. He seemed a good sort, perhaps a bit too ambitious for this kind of work though.

“Beautifully under my direction Talon… I mean Captain,” Ernie replied with a grin.

“What is wrong with this picture?” Talon asked him.

“Not a thing! We executed perfectly, dividing the road to create an impassable wall, effectively increasing our chances of seizing a majority of the treasure!” Ernie said it all in his cock sure attitude.

Talon only nodded. “Lets run it again before we begin our night raid drills, Lisa take charge of group two, Ernie you are with me.”

Ernie strutted over in his far too confident manner and stood beside Talon. Talon turned a slow burning look onto the cocky sailor until he stepped back. Only Honest stood next to him during these raids. Talon turned his gaze back over to the town as the crew prepared for another mock run at the ghostly town.

It had been nothing any of them had expected. The city was filled with ghosts and all of them overly excited about taking part in the training. Apparently no one ever visited the city and things here had become very boring. It was perfect for their training however, the buildings were squat houses made with wood that had been bent and then worked to be as firm as the newer brick buildings on the mainland. Caution had been giving to all of them to not actually harm any of the structures and so far everything had gone smoothly. Although, they spent more time waiting for the ghosts to quiet down after each run then they did resetting themselves, it was a luxury to get this practice time in.

“Watch Lisa closely Ernie,” Talon said as he raised his hand. Soon the city was quiet but there was a palpable sense of excitement lingering, as if it were all real. With a drop of his hand, the raid began again.
*
Honest shifted away from the blade easily, the ninja was good but he was only human. He was tiring and becoming frustrated. Honest had yet to lay a hand on him but it was obvious she could take him at any moment. Suddenly Honest found a knife in her belly, and the ninja twisted it with a grim look of satisfaction deep in his eyes.

Honest looked at the twisting knife then back into the sadistic eyes and laughed. Then she balled her fist and slugged the ninja once in the gut, just as Talon had shown her. From the sounds the ninja made, he had just lost his lunch inside that mask of his.

Honest pushed the ninja off and he fell to the ground trying desperately to regain his breath. Then she slowly withdrew the knife.

“Now I have a weapon,” she said with a grin. Then she glided away, and waited for him to catch his breath. As she did, her wound healed but she was rather agitated at the tear the knife had left in her nice traveling clothes. She heard the sound of a loud POP behind her and turned to see the ninja breaking a tree limb in two with his knee. In a series of quick movements he had sharpened one end to a point.

“I know how to deal with your kind,” he said with barely controlled rage.

Honest stepped forward to meet him and suddenly found herself stopped by something at her feet. It was the red shirted man; he had wrapped himself around her ankles.

“Take her quickly!” he shouted from the ground. “Then I will join your Captains crew and get out of this idiotic shirt!”

The ninja smiled and hurled the limb like a spear, driving the point home into the heart of the vampire.

Honest gasped, well she made the sound of a gasp at least. Then her teeth seemed to extend, her nails grew to claws, and her eyes turned the color of a blood moon. Night had set, and the night was hers.

“Idiots,” she hissed. “Why does every pirate have to surround themselves with idiots?” Honest grabbed the branch in her chest and jerked it out, hurling it far into the jungle night. With a scream of pure undead rage she grabbed the red shirted man, who was stammering his usual begging of mercy. Unfortunately for him, she was not Talon. She fed deeply.
When she was done the ninja was nowhere to be seen. Honest wasted no time following the tracks to a cave, where Dumpling lay unconscious. With strength that would have amazed any one who did not know her she shoulder the pudgy sailor and headed back towards the city of the dead, and her Captain. But not before collecting the red shirt from the ex-lawyer.
*

The crew was exhausted when they finally turned in for the night. Ernie had not seen the error of his ways after watching Lisa drive her crew in perfect synch with the others. Ernie had pushed too far in, too fast, too hard, and seeking the first of the glory. Lisa understood the glory would be divided as evenly as the treasures they would find. Lisa was now first mate of the Other Boat. Ernie had not been happy, and had fought the decision as hard as he could. Talon gave him every opportunity to prove he could work with the team instead of ahead of them. But Ernie went on about the pirate’s life being one of every man for himself, and how he had to watch for number one. A straight right from Talon had stopped that gibberish though, and Ernie had packed his things and went off in search Alistair the Cripplers ship.

Talon knew it was no big loss for the crew. Lisa would make an excellent first mate for Dennis, she was smart, and knew how to use her common sense. Except for her unbelievable fear of spiders, she might make a captain someday. Dennis was too stupid to be scared of much, and usually acted scared along with the crew so he would fit in. Dennis was an easily controlled captain for Talon but if Talon retired, Dennis couldn’t handle the job of a true captain.

Talon puffed on a pipe along with a couple of the ghosts there, they had been trading stories and the undead of this city were extremely hospitable. From what Talon could discern the really dangerous undead vermin had left long ago due to inactivity. His crew had been the first live visitors in over seventy years and the ghosts and spirits that had no choice but to stay there, welcomed them heartily.

Talon felt a slight tug at his consciousness and his brow pulled tight in puzzlement. He looked around until one of the ghosts, an older gentleman named Brand who had been the city’s blacksmith, asked him what was wrong.

“I don’t know,” Talon replied with a shrug. “Something, or someone is coming.”

“Captain,” a voice jerked him from his senses. It was Dennis. “Some of the lads wanted to do something special for our guests but we can’t think of anything. So Ol’ Sharky had an idea to put on a show for ‘em. If that would be okay with you of course.”

Talon grinned at the boyish excitement playing across his crew’s faces. He looked to Brand first, “What do you think Brand? Would you folks like to see a bit of entertainment?”
“Would we ever! A show? A real show? With music and comedies and the like?”

“Aye sir!” Dennis responded. “One you won’t soon be forgetting either! It was written by one of our own!”

“Have it ready in an hour Dennis,” Talon responded, and with a hasty salute his crew hurried off to make their preparations.

An hour went by quickly, and the whole time Talon had an eerie feeling something was coming. There was nothing pointing to the why he felt this way but he felt eyes on him. He could tell a couple of the other crew members did to, the way they would shift their eyes into the dark night, searching for a shadow against the black backdrop of the moonless sky.

But there was much to do, and Talon had helped with one of the key moments of the show. He had directed the show on one of the long ocean voyages that get pirates from one point to another. Days upon end of water and little else. Talon had devised these entertainments to keep his crew from going mad with the quiet swell of the open waters, and it had worked like a charm. Most of his crew was actually quite good.

The ghosts gathered slowly as they did everything, to them time meant nothing; although there was a sense of excitement there was no concept of urgency. Talon still felt the eyes on him; they were coming from the jungle. He would swear it.

“Good evening fine hosts!” Talon said from the make shift stage that had been created with some tables and curtains. “I welcome you to Scurvy Bottom’s presentation of “Pie on the Horizon”, an original play written by our own Master at arms, Cutter Henderson! We do hope you enjoy it!”

Talon stepped aside to let the play begin when a flash out of the corner of his eye warned him of danger. Talon dropped to his back and felt the hot wind of flying metal just skim his neck. With a thunk the metal star shaped thing smacked the stage and embedded itself. There was only a brief pause before the crew realized what had happened and scrambled to a defensive position around their Captain. Nigel and Lawrence took up central positions so they could see over the heads of everyone else. Talon stood and was shoved back down by the huge hands of Lawrence.

The ghosts roared with laughter.

“Assassin!” Nigel roared and pointed to the street. Talon peered between the legs of whoever was blocking his path and saw it. A shade seeming to move between the little lights there was but radiating danger. Clad in grey with two sword hilts peeking over the right shoulder, Talon knew these men well. Ninja, trained in the art of killing in several various methods, each as painful or as simple as the person who was paying him wanted it to be.

Talon stood again and when Lawrence went to push him down Talon slapped the hand away. If the ninja was walking down the street, he wanted to be seen. But a commotion behind the stage pulled Talon’s attention away. There was Honest, dumping the unconscious blob of flesh that was Dumpling onto the ground. She looked as beautiful as ever, not a hair out of place, not even breathing heavily. Or at all really.

“You are safe!” Talon shouted as he made his way to her, the group shuffling to keep him surrounded. The ghosts roared with laughter.

“I am no thanks to that ass in the red shirt!” Honest spit. “Can we make it known that wooden stakes through the heart do not affect vampires? Where in the Heavens did that ever come from? Why would a piece of wood do something a bullet or sword can not?”

The ghosts were no longer laughing. Honest gave the crowd a smile and a wave before bursting into one of the shorter Shakespearean sonnets. This one only took about thirty minutes to recite. When she was done ghostly tears fell down the faces of the audience, jungle animals gathered in natural harmony, angels and demons stopped their never ending wars to listen, and the assassin considered a career change. Right after this last job.

“Bring the table,” Honest said to the crew running the stage, and they scurried to do her bidding while the applause went on.

“That was most beautiful,” the assassin said as he approached, and the crowd gasped. “You have opened my eyes to whole new world of possibilities. I no longer wish to take life, I want to love and be free!”

“I like that idea much better,” Talon said.

“But I am bound by the word of my ancestors to honor my last contract. That means ridding myself of you Talon!”

The assassin withdrew his sword in a slow menacing fashion and began to advance to the small stage. Talon reached behind him and chose his own weapon, a weapon he had made earlier that very day. A coconut cream pie.

Talon launched the pie with pinpoint accuracy. Perhaps it was the hilarity of such a device that gave the assassin pause. Perhaps it was the speed and ferocity with which Talon had moved. But I prefer to think that something within the assassin wanted to lose for the pie caught him directly in his masked face. The sword hit the ground and the assassin staggered. A wipe of his eyes allowed the assassin just enough time to see a second pie heading directly at him.

The ghosts howled with laughter, many clutching their ephemeral stomachs as if they could remember what it was like to laugh so hard.

The assassin turned and saw a second table of pies being brought out. He ran to it and turned to hurl his own attack upon the crew. SPLAT! He was hit again, and he was impressed by the accuracy of the ships captain.

Then chaos rained supreme as pies began flying, the crew no longer caring who they hit. Ghosts looked surprised and ducked, although the pies would not have made contact with them, they were too caught up in the moment.

Honest stood like a queen amidst the flying debris, not a single streak of pie had marred her beautiful features. Talon stood next to her likewise clean of the creamy substance, and they both laughed like they had not in a long time. The crew spent more time slipping and wrestling then they did actually throwing anything. Talon watched as Cutter gingerly picked up a pie and gave chase to Lisa, slipping on the slick stage, landing on his back and having his own pie perform a perfect triple spin before landing messy side up on his face.

In chaos the pirate reigns supreme and it was not long before the assassin was on his hands and knees, laughing uncontrollably and unable to do anything other than guffaw. Slowly the pies stopped flying, the ghosts broke into a roaring applause, and Talon turned to see two pies remaining. He took one for himself and gave one to Honest. Honest looked confused, he had never done this before.

Without warning Talon threw the pie directly into Honest’s face. Her mouth still open from the shock, Honest launched her own pie. Talon didn’t bother dodging and took the full brunt of the substance in his own face. His own smile was dim in comparison to the one on Honest’s face. She had never been in a pie fight, though she had watched them many times. This was grand!

Towels and rags were passed around while everyone cleaned themselves, except for the few who were eating the residue. Talon and Honest made their way down the aisle to where the assassin was on his knees, head bowed in surrender. He had been beaten and he knew it.

“I ask only one thing mighty Talon,” the assassin asked as the crowds all hushed and watched. “Make my death quick.”

Talon said nothing as he reached down and unsheathed the second sword from the assassins back. He twirled the sword once in a basic move, testing its balance and make. It was actually rather shoddy, decent balance but poorly made. Talon tossed it aside and turned to his crew.

“Do we have room for one more?”

(I know it may seem a lame decision point but it does truly effect what happens in the future. So here is your decision to make. Do we ask the assassin to join our crew? Kill him? Or something else?

A poll will follow shortly after I have heard a few comments.)

Thanks for playing!
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ethereal_fauna
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Posted: Fri May 20, 2005 11:21 am    Post subject:  

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Hilarious, riotous, yet again. Red-shirt bought it in a uniquely satisfying manner, and the pie fight is worth several re-reads, since the tears from the laughter caused me to miss something I'm sure.

Why not have the ninja join us? I'm sure we could fit him in suitably, with a few more practice raids on the ghost city. Maybe test his adaptability in such a fashion, before deciding whether we should accept him or pie him to death.
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my self
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Posted: Fri May 20, 2005 2:22 pm    Post subject:  

Definitely have the ninja join! Honest can deal with him if he tries anything. This chapter didn't strike me as as funny as the previous ones but it was pretty good.
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Key
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Posted: Fri May 20, 2005 4:14 pm    Post subject: Re: Chapter 4- Finally!  

LOL, great chapter, Random! I can't help pointing out a couple of my favorite lines:

Random wrote: He couldn’t stop giggling whenever someone said the word “dinghy” in his presence. He had been a lawyer on the mainland, and a not very nice one at that.
...
She looked as beautiful as ever, not a hair out of place, not even breathing heavily. Or at all really.

I think the assassin would make a fine addition to our crew. Maybe we need to make him swear an oath of service, though, or else I could imagine him suddenly remembering his duty to kill us right in the middle of a battle and that leading to all sorts of complications.
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Araex
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Posted: Sat May 21, 2005 5:16 am    Post subject:  

Great chapter! Let him join us (hee hee "dinghy) *ahem* yeh.
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Reiso
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Posted: Sat May 21, 2005 12:50 pm    Post subject:  

Great Chapter Random! I particularly enjoyed the scene with red-shirt, Honest and the Ninja as well. The way you were stacking his sins (incompetent pirate, former lawyer, etc), I was absolutely sure you were justifying Honest's need to feed on him so we wouldn't hold it against her and then BAM! Ninja! And she ends up feeding on him anyway, but at that point he was a traitor so who cares? Expertly managed. I also got quite a laugh at the image of the Ninja breaking off a branch and sharpening it near instantly with his bare hands. Funny stuff.

I am really enjoying how you give every character these funny quirks, but somehow retain a level of depth in them that prevents those qualities from making them a joke. Scenes like the uncertain parting bethwen Talon and Honest at the beginning really help keep that balanced. Great staging too, you almost casually work in descriptive details that bring their environment to life without pausing for monotonous descriptions. I could learn something from that.

I agree with everyone so far, let the Ninja join. Then we can truly have Pirates, Vampires and Ninjas (oh my!), on one boat.
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The Powers That Be
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Posted: Sat May 21, 2005 4:23 pm    Post subject:  

Have ye all gone soft? Must I remind ye of your pirate nature?! No quarter, I say! He said it himself, he's honor-bound (whatever that means) to kill the Cap'n.

On the other hand, we could use one of these ninjas among our crew. Let him live, for now, to teach one of our own them ninja tricks o' his. One of our crew who has the time, who has nought better t'do. Aye, Dumpling, I be lookin' at ye. Aaarr!
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ethereal_fauna
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Posted: Sat May 21, 2005 5:19 pm    Post subject:  

Dumpling learning the way of the ninja? :shock: Now that's funny.
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kenshin himura
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Posted: Mon May 23, 2005 10:21 am    Post subject:  

he he great chapter random, im still lagfhing so hard that i must go dig my own grave befor i just fall over and croak!

just go with ninja steve to join!
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Piemur1
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Posted: Fri May 27, 2005 9:33 am    Post subject: Vote: Let the ninja join!  

Yo, new guy here. Don't have time at the moment (writing this place's URL on a napkin) except to write this little post.

I loved this story. This last chapter had plot twists galore! We were expecting Red Shirt (maybe that IS his name...excuse me, WAS) to die a horrible gruesome death in order to protect Honest, or something similar. Something that basically stated that, yes, he was just cannon fodder, but still a loyal pirate to Talon. Great way to throw those expectations out the window. Then the expectations of something mysterious and possibly horrifying at the Dead City. Nope, it's just a great place for the pirates to practice their raiding. THAT threw me for a loop. For a moment, I thought that it was a different pirate group that was attacking a live city. That was great.

I say, let the ninja join! If anyone's familiar with the Japanese Anime, "Naruto", maybe he could have some cool jutsu's that he could teach or show off or something! Now, what's the guy's name?
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D-Lotus
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Posted: Fri May 27, 2005 3:04 pm    Post subject:  

my self wrote: Definitely have the ninja join! Honest can deal with him if he tries anything. This chapter didn't strike me as as funny as the previous ones but it was pretty good.

I'm completely with you, myself...
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Smee
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Posted: Tue Jun 21, 2005 2:18 pm    Post subject:  

Excellent Chapter Random - I don't know how I missed it for so long. :shock:

Raid Practice, Pie fights, Ninjas, Red shirt - it's all been mentioned by others, but sheer brilliant entertainment. :D

Let's give the Ninja a chance.
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Idea master
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Posted: Sat Jun 25, 2005 4:03 pm    Post subject:  

Yar me hearties! Where in the bloody contract does it say that the ninja can't journey with us and kill us on our death-bed when we're 80? He can still fullfill it! Just when we're bloody old and all! Not only will he be a great asset to both ships, but the pirates can learn ninja moves in their spare time! That is, if they HAVE any spare time! Yar har har!
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