City of IF

[Chinaren]

Warning! Read at your own risk!

Danger Will Robinson! Danger!

This SGame contains unsuitable material! Twisted adult scenes! Perversion! Violence! Torture! More perversion! Other disgusting stuff!

Don’t say I didn’t warn you. If you are young, don’t like ‘naughty scenes’, lack a humorous disposition, or are otherwise unsuitable, then don’t read this SGame!

If you don’t quite understand this warning, then you shouldn’t be allowed to use a computer, as you are not mentally up to the job. In fact it’s pretty amazing you’ve got this far.


Chapter 8 – Gods in the Toilet. .

“If you don’t open the door right now, security will break it in, and the cost will be added to the bill!”

“Shit, I’m on a tight budget!” scowled Lily.

“That’s about the only thing tight about you,” Chinaren muttered.

“You two! I’ll deal with you later! Get in the bathroom, now!” She pushed the grumbling gods into the small room, where the two immediately started complaining all over again.

“It smells in here!”

“My me! What’s the kid been eating? Sewage?”

“You too,” said Lily, pushing Meany in after them. “Be quiet!”

Closing the door and muffling the moans of the gods, she turned around to face the large form of Zephyr. “Get your clothes off!” she hissed.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard!” Lily said, stripping off her own garments just as there was a renewed complaint from the door.

“Miss! This is Charles, the head of security here. You have three seconds to open the door!”

Lily shoved the massively hairy Zephyr, who had stripped off to reveal an enormous pink bra and panties set, backwards onto the bed. “Coming!” she said. Quickly pulling on a skimpy robe, she unlatched the door and peered out.

Standing on the other side of the door was a large man with short cropped blond hair and a square face. He wore a dark navy sweater and matching pants. Behind him was a smaller man dressed in a black jacket. Lilith thought he resembled a worried looking Charlie Chaplin.

“Hello there,” she put on her sweetest smile. “How may I help you handsome gentlemen?” She winked at the security guard.

The man was good, she had to admit. He only paused a second before recovering his composure. Trying his best not to look down, at where Lily had let the robe slip back to expose the tip of one breast, he cleared his throat and spoke, this time in a far more civil manner.

“Ahem. Ah, good evening miss. We’ve received reports of a disturbance from this room. I’ll have to come in and check, if you wouldn’t mind stepping back for a moment.”

“Oh officer, is that really necessary? I was just having a little… fun with my friend.” She winked and let the gown fall open a little more.

The security guard clenched his fists subconsciously and underwent a visible moment of internal debate, before he was jabbed in the back by the weasily manager. “I’m sorry Ma’am, he said, I have to come in and check. It will only be for a moment.”

“Very well then.” Lily stepped back and pulled her robe tight, resulting in a look of folorn longing on the big guards face as he stepped into the room.

“Sweet mother of god!” the man exclaimed as he saw Zephyr.

Zephyr had curled up on the bed, drawing the covers up around him in what, had he been anyone but Zephyr, would have been a provocative pose. As it was, it looked like some kind of bear in pink lingerie was attempting to hibernate on the bed.

“Hullo handsome,” the hairy form rumbled, winking and leering at the guard. “Come to join in have you? You’re a catch and no mistake.”

The security man paled and took an involuntary step backwards, bumping into the manager who was trying to peer around the door.

“This is my… er, girlfriend,” said Lily sweetly to the guard. She stepped closer and rubbed herself against the man, who was still staring, goggled eyed, at Zephyr. “How about a manage-et-trio?” she suggested, coping a quick feel of the fellows’ little soldier.

Whilst the guard was trying to formulate a response, the greasy manager finally managed to step into the room. “Mama mia!” he exclaimed, seeing Zephyr.

“Hello handsome,” growled Zephyr in response.

“I am sorry little lady,” the manager smarmed at the form on the bed. “I didn’t realize such a beautiful lady was here. I apologize for intruding.” He leered some more, and Zephyr preened, stretching his leg and splitting the stocking.

Lily, who had been taken by surprise for a moment, recovered and stepped forward again. “I’m sure my friend would enjoy dinner later,” she suggested. “Just now though, we’re kind of… busy. I hope you understand.”

“Why of course!” The manager glanced around the room. “It appears nothing is unusual here, except for the ravishing delight on the bed of course. We shall depart and leave you two ladies to your privacy.” He bowed slightly, eyes never leaving Zephyr.

“Er, of course.” Lilith pushed the two men back towards the corridor again, winking at the guard as he stepped out, and mouthing ‘call me’ at him.

He nodded and she closed the door behind them, slumping against the wall in relief. “Shit, that was close.”

There was a bump from the bathroom. “Can we come out now?” complained the muffled voice of one of the gods. “You don’t want to be too close to Chinaren for too long if you still want to be able to smell later.”

“Hey! I resemble that remark,” retorted the voice of the orange god.

“Exactly.”

“Mommy, these people are strange!” added a high pitched complaint.

Lily rolled her eyes and pulled her robe closed again. “Put some clothes on,” she said to Zephyr. “No sense traumatizing the kid any more than he already is.”

Once Zephyr was as decent as he could manage, she let the three out of the bathroom. Meany leaped out and clung onto her leg, whilst the orange monkey man and wizard followed with only slightly more decorum.

Lily examined the two strange creatures. She had to admit, there was a certain quality about the two, as if they were slightly more ‘real’ than most people. Then there was the fact the orange thing was… not a person at all.

“So then, now we’ve survived that crisis, as well as the toilet, perhaps you’ll be kind enough to send us back from where we came from.” The god called Idea Master folded his robed arms.

“I’m still not sure you’re gods,” said Lily. “And even if you are, who are you exactly? I’ve never heard of you.”

“And you are a scholar of heavenly affairs I take it?” asked Chinaren, wedging himself into one of the hotel chairs.

“Well, admittedly not.” Lily shrugged. “If you’re gods though, where are your powers? And why did you answer my summons?”

The two beings looked uncomfortable for a moment. “You may as well tell her, she’s one of yours anyway,” Chinaren said eventually, picking up and sniffing the hotel room service menu. “Is this edible do you think?”

“One of mine?” asked Lily.

Idea Master made a face. “Oh very well. You probably haven’t heard of us because we’re too old.”

“Too old?” asked Zephyr.

“Yes. Ancient actually. The orange monkey there…”

“Hey!”

“…created the dinosaurs for example,” IM continued. “I was against them all along, not enough brains you see? Still, we flipped a coin, a planet actually, and he won the toss.”

“Okay,” said Lily, narrowing her eyes. “I seeeee.” She didn’t. “Go on.”

“Well, it gets pretty boring being gods. Eternity’s a long time, even for us. After a few million years, we decided to play a game.”

“Oh oh,” said Lily. “I don’t like where this is heading.”

“So we played the first game.” IM looked smug for a moment. “Needless to say, I won.”

“Cheated!” interjected Chinaren, mouth full of menu.

“Superior tactics,” sniffed IM.

“He moved whilst I was distracted!”

“In any case, the long and short of it was, he lost, I won,” Idea Master finished up. “The dinosaurs lost and it was my turn to populate the earth.”

“You created humans?” asked Lily, eyes wide.

“Well, not at first no,” IM admitted. “I did cockroaches initially. Not bad for a first try eh?”

“Oooh, I’d rather you hadn’t,” said Zephyr. “I hate those things.”

“A feeling I shared,” said Chinaren. “Horrible little things, nothing like my magnificent giant reptiles.” He sniffed.

“So I tried again, and ended up with you lot,” IM said.

“Okay, and this answers my question how?” Lily said, sitting next to Zephyr on the bed. Meany climbed up into her lap and curled up into a ball.

“You asked a question?” IM frowned.

Lily clenched her teeth. “Why are you here?”

“I think it’s something to do with psychic energy in the multiverse,” Chinaren said. “The pent up energy tends to come together. Eventually it takes on a form. Kind of a god evolution…”

“I mean,” interrupted Lily, “why are you here in this room?”

“I thought you summoned us?” Chinaren looked puzzled.

“AHH!” Lily held her head in both hands. “Why did you answer my summons?”

“Oh. Well, it’s likely because we’re playing another game now,” Idea Master said. “I gave you a… power boost. It was probably a little too much, in hindsight.”

“Wait a minute, you’re playing another game?” Lily asked.

“I just said so didn’t I?”

“And the last game resulted in the extinction of the dinosaurs?” Lily was fast becoming alarmed.

“Yes, damned shame that was,” said Chinaren.

“So can we expect the same result this time?”

Idea Master shrugged. “Oh I don’t know. If he wins,” he gestured at Chinaren, who was now poking about in a bedside drawer, “then possibly. Maybe it would only result in the deaths of, say, half the population or something though.”

“Only half the population?” gasped Lily.

“Give or take.” IM didn’t appear too concerned. Lily said so.

“You don’t appear too worried that half your creations are possibly about to be wiped out,” she complained.

“Oh, I’m sure I’ll win. He’s hopeless at strategy,” IM said.

“So this mission I’m on, it’s part of your game?” asked Lily.

“You’re my main piece,” beamed IM. “Pretty cool eh?”

Lily groaned. “I think I’m going to throw up.”

“So how can you help us?” asked Zephyr.

“I’m a bit restricted in what I can do, and I’m not sure why our God powers aren’t working either,” IM replied. “But I can give you information if you ask for it. Of course, Chinaren can do the same for the other side, should they ask him.”

“Okay then.” Lily took a deep breath. “We need to find some items on this list I saw in Lord of the Night’s pocket. I can remember two more. One is the ‘Stone of the Dead’, and the other one is something called ‘The Pink Pearl’. Do you know where they are?”

“I think the Pink Pearl is somewhere on Twisted Sweetheart lane,” said IM.

“Never heard of it,” said Lily.

“Yes, well you probably wouldn’t have. It’s kind of here in the city, but in a rather twisted dimensional crack.”

“What about the Stone of the Dead?”

“Ah, that’s nearer. It’s in the graveyard. Has a guardian though, I don’t think Algu’s going to want to let it go.”

“Wonderful,” said Lily, absently stroking Meany’s hair. The kid had fallen asleep, still sucking his thumb.

“Which one shall we go after?” asked Zephyr.

“A good question,” said Lily. “A good question indeed.


>>>>>>

Okay, I’m probably going to split the chapters up from now on, one following ‘good’ and one following ‘evil’ much like my old Greed Story.

Hence I need discussion on what Lily does now. In the meantime I can work on the Evil chapter!

Er, no bids done this time, sorry, it’s hard to get all the bids in each time, and most are for the ‘other’ side anyway!

Comments and suggestions please!

<<<<<<

[NeverNeverGirl]

well written as always = zeph on the bed had me in stiches..

but good guys? meh

so boring

bring on the baddies

(oh btw she goes to see algu - predictable...)

[LordoftheNight]

Meh - this chapter was rubbish. I wasn't in it. Throw it away, and start again :P

Joking aside, I think Lily would go after the Pink Pearl. Twisted Sweetheart Lane sounds like it'd be right up her alley. Plus, with no guardian to deal with, she meant get sucked into an alternate dimensino herself, and that means Lordy (being me) wins by default. And I always win.

Go Team Chinaren.

[Whisperer]

Chinaren there are some mental pictures of Zephyr I can do without :shock:

Other than that it was an entertaining chapter.

[LordoftheNight]

Oh, and I just noticed the bias of the decision points. You realise this is the seventh one from the Good Guy perspective? And the only evil one had Lily sitting on top of me.

That's discrimination against various evil doers. We get the N.S.P.E.D. (National Society for the Protection of Evil Doers) on you.

[Mephistopheles]

i think that they should go after algu and his thingy. (interpret as you will!)

[algu95]

Messy!!! Bad you, weak Phallus! Apart from that... Yes, twisted sweetheart lane sounds good. And good chapter, especially the following part:

Quote: “What about the Stone of the Dead?”

“Ah, that’s nearer. It’s in the graveyard. Has a guardian though, I don’t think Algu’s going to want to let it go.”


So, the gods know about me, eh? AND I have one of the artifacts, this Stone of the Dead? Perfect... All so good for my plans... :lol: Ummm... That is, if you don't mess me up to much :(

[Crunchyfrog]

Yeah, stone of the dead. And get some clothes on that kid! :?

[Guest]

Ah Meph! *interprets Meph's message in a wrong way* but I f5 you Meph. It would be interesting to see what happens

[The White Blacksmith]

I say they go to Twisted Sweetheart lane, but Chinaren has to direct them because "It was his turn to place an item" and he, of course, gets lost. Cue pandemonium.

And Meany's still naked. Give him some clothes.

[Chinaren]

Poll is up! Don the g-string of voting.

This poll will probably last for a while. The next chapter will be following Evil.

[The White Blacksmith]

Argh. You have a tie.

[Guest]

oops I created a 3-way tie

[Chinaren]

Bugger. I closed the poll by accident. However, it shall remain open until we rejoin Lily and co. in chapter 10, so if you wish to vote, please PM me or post here.

Sorry!

[Crunchyfrog]

I'll go for option 2.

:)