City of IF

[ashkent]

“Do you really think that’s right? I know the odds are good, but it could be the wrong option.”

I read the closing paragraph of the speech I had created with intermittent help from Pinkie.

“Arrraar ar arr arrrrra.”

“I don’t really know why I am listening to you,” I said to my would-be partner. “What do you actually know about human politics?”

I listened to the clock on the wall ticking.

“Exactly, and as there is someone about to open that door and take away whatever speech is on this desk, I’m afraid I have no alternative but to go with this one.”

I laid the sheet of paper on the desk by the still-very-dead Hector Carlton’s hand, releasing it as the door to my left opened and a flustered Parliament aide hurried in.

“You do realise I should have been and gone now?” I said to Pinkie as we watched the aide attempt to resuscitate the body. “If I decide to let you come with me again, you are not to bring that scythe under any circumstances. You’re too much of a liability.”

“Arrr.”

“And if you say sorry once more I will cut off your tongue.”

“Arrarr!”

“That is not harsh. Deconstructing you with the tip of my scythe would be harsh.”

I waited for the aide to run along and raise the alarm, but instead he pulled out a mobile phone and punched in a number.

“Call an ambulance and get them down to Hector Carlton’s office,” he said after a few seconds. “Well he’s dead. I’m not a doctor, am I? I don’t know what it was that got him. I’ll leave the door open for them. No I can’t hang around. I need to get this speech upstairs to the Cat.”

And with that he was gone, leaving Pinkie and I alone with the corpse.

“Arrarrrrrar arra aarr?”

“It’s the Prime Minister of Britain. They call him that because of his smile I believe. Now come on. I’ve got to see how this turns out.”

“Arrar arrrarr ar?”

“Why? I don’t have time to list all the reasons why, but in a nutshell I want to see how bad this is going to get. As if I don’t have enough on my metaphorical plate with this Wee group, I have a really bad feeling in my bones and it isn’t from age. Come on. Parliament is going into session!”

* * *

The cacophony of a multitude of monotone voices filled the large chamber, and somewhere in the middle of the rabble a single word could only just be heard.

“Order! Order!”

“I’m sure there has to be an easier way,” I mused. “So many years since they set up their democracy and government and they can think of no better way to get attention than to shout.”

I walked down the central aisle, turning every now and again to take note of the faces on either side. There were few new faces since my last visit to Westminster, although there were plenty I believed I would be soon seeing again and many of them appeared to be asleep despite the noise.

“Order! Order!”

I propped my scythe against a rail and waited for calm to descend. Pinkie trotted up beside me, wheezing from the swift journey between the speech writer’s office and the grand hall where the same writer’s alleged final speech would find its voice.

“Are you alright?” I asked.

“Arrr….rrr.arrr.arrr arr.”

“That’s a shame. You shouldn’t linger around the smoky areas with Jimmy so much. It obviously doesn’t do you much good.”

“Arr arrr arr!”

“And that will just make you go blind.”

“ORDER!”

Finally something close to silence descended on the gathering, the grumbling talk becoming a low stirring before the Speaker opened the session and introduced the Prime Minister.

“Thank you, Mr Speaker,” the Prime Minister said with a grin and a grand hand gesture. “I would like…if I may…to move straight into the main part…of today’s agenda.”

“Arrr arr arrrrrr arrr arrrr?”

“How should I know why he leaves gaps between his words? He just does. Now just listen. I need to find out what this is about.”

The Prime Minister moved a number of papers around as he spoke, and I saw my speech working its way to the top. If I had guts, I suppose they would have been twisted into knots.

“My honourable friend,” the Cat continued, indicating the dark haired man opposite, “has on many occasions… accused this government of…not boldly stepping up to the bar…when it comes to the important matters which…affect our country.”

A sudden surge of vaguely animal noises burst from my right.

“But that is about to change right now!”

A counter surge of babble flowed from my left.

“I have a statement to make…to the house and to the people…of Britain regarding the threat that has…been hanging over the free world…for too many years now. I am talking about…the threat of terrorism.”

I felt metaphorical sweat on my brow as my speech arrived at the top of the pile.

“My honourable friend has…on many occasions…said that a decision is needed on how to deal with the…unseen and…deadly threat that plagues…our lives in these times. So it is now our intention to end the debate…and take action.”
The Prime Minister looked down at the paper before him.

I felt my leg begin to twitch.

“It is my duty…and my mission…as Prime Minister of this country to inform the world…that as of this moment…we will be launching…our new Doomsday weapon.”
My leg shot out. Pinkie landed with a yelp half way along the aisle.

I looked at the little demon.

“Why did I let you talk me into writing ‘yes’?” I put a hand on my face.

Somewhere in another dimension of time and space, I heard thousands of new files being created for the expected torrent of new souls.

“Fuck,” I said to anyone willing to listen. “I think we have another problem to deal with.”

[Chinaren]

Rockin!! :clap:

And amongst the many...

Quote: “So many years since they set up their democracy and government and they can think of no better way to get attention than to shout.”

:lol:

[shy_blu_eyes]

Beautiful Ash!

I'm not sure what the DP is supposed to be though.

[ashkent]

Oh...i forgot about that. Umm...two ticks.

Hmm...

Ahh...

Erm...

Ok...decision point is thus...

How, in part or in full, does Grim go about preventing the annihilation of a large chunk of the human race?

Order!

[Black Hawk]

He doesn't.
let it blow up and he has less work to do later

[shy_blu_eyes]

Somehow he has to arrange the deaths of everyone who knows how the device works (and is he authorized to even do that?). Even if he pulls it off, there's no guarantee that some fool won't launch a "pre-emptive retaliatory strike" or some other foolishness.

Wouldn't it be deliciously ironic if preventing this was the very reason Wee was trying to take him out in the first place?

[Crunchyfrog]

Do something whacky to the Prime Minister, so it looks as if he's taken leave of his sanity, in the hope that it will cast some doubt over his so-called 'decision'.

Marvellous chapter! Hear hear!

[ashkent]

A couple more days for suggestions before I get the poll out. Steady missus, please!

[Chinaren]

I'm with Bawk. I say he doesn't. He does have to hire more staff though, ready for the influx. ;)

[CynicBrit]

Hi, I just signed up and this was the first thing I clicked onto. I like this story a lot. I like the idea of the PM taking leave of his senses.

side note:It is actually illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament. No joke. :clap:

[ashkent]

Well, first off...Welcome welcome welcome and I think that's the first time i've been anyone's first read.

*wipes away tear from eye*

I have to say i'm quite liking the idea of getting the PM to take leave of his senses too. So i think it's time to open up the vote. Let democracy commence!!

[Chinaren]

Are the first three votes supposed to all be the same? :?

[ashkent]

Hmm...no they're not. They were definitely different when i wrote them. Let's take a look see.

[ashkent]

OK, ignore the first two options. When i go to edit the poll they don't exist there, i come back and there they are again.

[ashkent]

Ok. after much delay the new chapter is on its way.

[scissorkitty]

yay! I'm excited. I love this SG, and it's getting me into the skeleton-filled Holiday spirit! bwaa haa!