City of IF

[Emperor]

Chapter 1

Warning. This story contains strong language, scenes of violence and other matter that may be offensive. For mature readers only.


In a real dark night of the soul
It is always three o’clock in the morning
Day after day.

F. Scott Fitzgerald, “The Crackup”


Her name was Symphony but she couldn’t sing in key to save her life and this is her Requiem.

My name, that’s not so important, you might as well call me the blank piece of paper that her artist’s pen of a soul so caringly left its mark. I was the parchment, the scroll, the leaf of paper that soaked up the ink – as a matter of fact just call me Leif.




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The red flashing numerals blinked angrily at him, the number 22 flickered on and off at a tremendous speed as if threatening to self-destruct if the answering machine had to receive and store even one more message. He couldn’t get himself to bother checking it though; he knew it was just another parade of voices offering him empty consolation and platitudes. He reached for the bottle and took another drink off of the nearly empty vessel; the dark amber liquid no longer burned but merely just warmed his throat and chest as it made its way down to his stomach. He knew if you drank enough alcohol you stopped feeling anything, your nervous system simply stopped receiving input of any sort. He wondered if you went even further beyond thinking and feeling – if you could drown memory and existence in aged, fermented liquid. He hoped so and swirled the whiskey around in the bottle taking small pleasure in the fact that to attempt reaching a state of inebriated bliss took considerable effort.

“You’ve reached where you have called so leave a message.”

The prerecorded announcement broke him out of his fuzzy contemplation as he attempted to shield himself with the bottle just in case his instincts were right about the machines imminent doom at having to store another message.

“Lee, I know you’re there...”

Despite her assurance, Wendy’s voice still held the unsurety of not really knowing that was where he was.

“Lee, pick up please…”

Leif could tell that she had been crying, her voice was hoarse and though the wracking sobs were over she still sniffled occasionally. A faint click sounded and his answering machine beeped loudly. The number 23 now strobbed from it now, flooding the dark living room with its red light. He finished off the bottle and gestured with his hand toward it.

“C’mon, I dare you!”

It continued to blink irreverently at him, seemingly not impressed at all by his bolstered state. He stood up and the dingy brown carpet seemed to rock ever so gently, he reared back and threw bottle at the message collecting menace, missing it wide. He lost his balance and tumbled face first toward floor landing hard enough to make a thudding sound. Somewhere above him the infernal machine continued to blink on and on, but despite his dark need for revenge against it he decided that the carpeted floor was too comfortable to get up off of and he closed his eyes.




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Wendy hung up her phone and took the last two pieces of tissues out of the box and blew her nose heartily into them. She threw them on the table in frustration that was born more of worry. This was at the least the seventh message she had left Lee and she had lost count at how many times she had tried to call and didn’t leave a message at all. No one had seen or heard anything of Lee since the funeral and she knew that he was living in a very dangerous and dark place in his own mind right now. But she knew better than to try to force contact with Lee, he would only see it as empty sympathy and according to his convoluted personal code of honor that only Stephen and Kelly understood, would be seen as a slight. As close as she was to Lee she would never be as close to him as the other two Musketeers, in their loose circle of friends she was seen as the girl who was on the inside of their tight knit trio. Though, in all reality she was more like the interpreter to everyone else. A liaison and diplomat to anyone who was outside of that bond the three of them shared. It was not as if Wendy was not a close friend to the three of them, it was not as if the three of them did not care about her or treat her as an outsider. The simple fact was that, their bond was so tight with each other that anyone else couldn’t help being an outsider. When she was around them she felt more like the fourth side to a triangle, or the fourth wheel on a tricycle.

Their close bond transformed her relationship with the three of them as not something extra and unnecessary but by adding to it made it into something completely different. Wendy could understand why so many people were envious of the friendship the three of them shared, it was something that couldn’t be tainted, couldn’t be tested and couldn’t be broken. There were even times when Wendy herself couldn’t help but feel the slight tint of jealousy, for she couldn’t think of a single person that she knew who wouldn’t want a friend who knew them for everything that they were. They knew each other’s secrets, flaws, all the little untidy bits that we as humans tend to try to keep to ourselves so that no one else could see them. They knew all these things about each other and instead of trying to fix them they just simply accepted them. Instead they chose to let time and life fix it on its own, knowing full well that in the meantime they always had each other to fall back on.

Wendy looked at her calendar, in four more days it would make it a full three months since she had spoken to Lee. She was at a loss at what to do, she knew that when Lee wanted to talk he would either call her or pick up his phone when she called and to do anything in the meantime might even distance him even more. Her beeper danced on her kitchen table as it vibrated and chirped out to her. Wendy put the problem of Lee aside for the moment and grabbed her black duffel bag that had her uniform and job necessities in them. She picked up the beeper and looked at the code it flashed at her, she translated the number in her head into the information she needed, it told her that there were at the least five fatalities. She clipped on her beeper, phoned dispatch on her cell as she walked out of her small studio apartment, locking the door behind her.

“Dispatch.”

“This is Wendy Almaz, I’m on emergency call status, there is a 11-80 with possible 20f’s.”

“Copy you are active, report in you’ll be riding with E.M.T. Kern.”

“Thanks.”

Wendy disconnected and made her way to her car all thoughts and worry for Lee were temporarily and forcible pushed aside.



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The last place he expected to wake up was a cemetery, the sun shone down casting blazing light and pain into his head. He propped himself up on one elbow and shut his eyes tight against the light coming off the burning ball in the sky. Vague, broken memories came back to him as he tried to cobble together some semblance of reason why he awoke on this pristinely kept lawn surrounded by stone effigies. He remember trying to kill his answering machine, then waking again to place a call to someone, he recalled fumbling in his pockets to pay a taxi driver… and then this. He dared to open his eyes just slightly and though his head throbbed in protest, the light stopped feeling like hot knives piercing into the back of his skull. He sat up fully and his stomach roiled as rancid bile rose to the back of his throat, Leif decided it would be better if he just sat there and let his body acclimate to being alive again. Time passed as he sat there with one hand on his forehead trying to force his stomach in submission. It only barely registered that a shadow was being cast over him. He looked up, fully expecting rain or a solar eclipse, instead a feminine figure stood before him, her features indistinguishable as the sun blazed a bright aura around her.

“Welcome back.”

When she spoke Leif knew that she was barely speaking above a whisper but either the wind was carrying her voice to him or in his hyper sensitive state he had acquired super human hearing. He held up one hand to shield his eyes against the bright glare that seemed to halo around her and only then did he realize that she was actually bent over slightly with both hands on her knees.

“Welcome back?”

The voice that came out of his throat was not one he would recognize as his own, it sounded pained and overused, it croaked and groaned its way past his lips. The shadowed figure leaned closer to put one hand on his forehead, in that moment his head swam and his whole body tingled for a moment. Then the moment was gone and as sudden as the wave hit him, Leif felt abruptly human again.

“Are you okay?”

Though the pain wasn’t gone the pounding in his head became bearable, his body no longer seemed at war with him forcing him to pay the attrition of a whole day spent on consuming mass amounts of liquor. She had drawn her hand back and now that his eyes were not going to shrivel and dry out from any source of light he could begin to make out some of her features. Her long, straight raven hair fell forward across her shoulders hanging freely in the air. She wore a loose fitting red tee shirt and blue jeans that seemed to be faded from a thousand years of unending use. Her face was plain in such a way that it couldn’t help but be beautiful in its unassuming way. She wore no make-up that he could tell and yet still her light brown eyes seemed to glimmer and shine as if standing out against dark eyeliner.

“Yeah, I think so.”

She smiled, her teeth were slightly yellowed and one of her central incisors was slightly chipped but from what he could tell otherwise in good condition, she sat next to him pulling her knees up to her chest. Leif noticed that she was wearing no shoes and her toenails were polished purple though they were badly chipped and needed retouching. He stared at the profile of her face trying to place her individual features like pieces to a jigsaw puzzle, hoping that with enough pieces he would remember if he knew her at all. She had a slight thin nose and the pale skin there had sprinkles of odd shaped freckles living there. The corners of her soft eyes seemed to curve just slightly upward and at their edges the beginning of crow’s feet could be seen. Leif decided that she was far too young to have the blemish from aging skin so she either spent a lot of time outdoors or smiling. He could tell that the bone structure of her face had the barest hints of sharp edges but her round cheeks and oval face seemed to hide them. She was definitely a mix of some sort but no matter how long he looked at her face he couldn’t place it.

“So…have we met, I mean you seem to know me but I have no idea who you are?”

As she turned to look at him the sun reflected its light for a brief second against the surface of her eyes and had she not fully turned to look at him with those brownish-gold eyes he could have sworn that they were green for a moment.

“You don’t remember last night?”

His heart increased its tempo as his mind whirled trying to force the memory of her to the surface. Had he met her in some dark bar, drunk to stupidity and came here? But to do what, as drunk as he was why would he bring her to a cemetery to fulfill any lecherous intents and why would she agree to go?

“Uhh, sorry I don’t remember much.”

She laughed, throwing her face up to the sky, as the sun shone light up her features her skin shimmered bronze. She shook her head and her unbound hair fell to rest on her shoulders again. Her laugh was melodic and capturing, Leif stared at her in complete bewilderment trying to understand her on any level.

“Don’t look so worried Lee, we didn’t do anything like that!”

Leif was completely surprised to hear her call him Lee, that name was reserved for only those who were closest to him. There were only two people left alive who had the right to use that moniker and if he could help it he would estrange himself from them both.

“Don’t call me Lee, my name is Leif.”

His voice had gone dark and with the remnants of its earlier gravely state it came out sounding like a threat at the same time. She looked out over the graves and was still smiling.

“You were the one who insisted on me calling you Lee last night.”

Leif tried to let it go, tried to let it simply pass but then that unthinking part of his brain, the part that just absorbed information, started to piece together where he was. He wasn’t in just some cemetery; this was the same cemetery where Steven was buried just two days ago. He stood up his grief transforming to anger and rage at the loss threatening to rob him of his sanity.

“I don’t know who you are and I don’t know how the hell you convinced me to come here but let’s get a couple of things straight. Number one I was drunk out of my mind last night so I’m sure it wasn’t hard to influence me to do anything and number two, don’t call me Lee.”

She looked up at him and though Leif wasn’t sure he thought he could see sadness looking out.

“Don’t be mad at me Lee; it’s not my fault that you drank enough whiskey to short out your brain making you incapable of memory or gratitude. It’s not my fault that I found you here in the middle of the night face down in your own vomit. And even though you are currently incapable of correcting me if I was wrong you asked me to keep you company last night. Lee.”

Something insubstantial crept into his head, wasn’t a memory; it was more like a ghost of a memory. Whisper thin images and recalled sensations fought their way to the surface of his understanding. He remembered shivering and the smell and taste of whiskey and puke in his mouth. He remembered thin arms around his waist as someone as warm as the sun in summer held him from behind singing a song to comfort him. He remembered that the voice was so off key it made him lose all his walls. Leif looked at her, stared into her eyes; his mind desperately trying to connect it all but the longer he looked at her the more he was sure that it wasn’t sadness that she was looking at him with, it was pity.

“Fuck you, you crazy bitch.”

He stormed off toward the exit his anger and rage boiling to an explosive level; he had to get out of here and away from her before he did something even stupider than trying to drink himself to oblivion.

“You’re welcome.” She shouted at his retreating figure.



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When he finally gotten home he was too tired to feel any rage or anger or emotion of any sort, he had decided that it would be better to walk the nine miles home – which he convinced himself that having no money didn’t factor into his decision at all. Halfway home not only had his anger been drained out of Leif but he also couldn’t seem to muster enough strength to take another step. It was a bright, sunny spring day but the heat of summer bore down on him and took every ounce of emotion he had been hoarding to himself and sapped it right out of him. So instead he called another taxi, defeated and exhausted he could barely stay awake for the short ride home. Half stumbling he reached into his jean pocket for his apartment keys. He felt their hard shape in his hand and pulled them out, as he did a small lavender piece of paper fell to the poured concrete doorstep. Leif bent down to pick it up and unfolded it as he crossed his threshold; he closed the security gate then the door behind him. His efforts to bar all light coming in from his barricaded windows seemed to be paying off for he had to turn on a light just to read what was written on it. In a neat, tiny scrawl was just a name and a phone number.

Symphony
929-1310

It could only belong to one person, the woman he met in the graveyard, he began to wad up the piece of paper in his hand getting ready to throw it in the trash. But before he could finish crumpling the piece of paper a loud succession of the heavy strikes rattled his security door. He started in surprise and opened the door. The black metal broke up is features only slightly, the man stood about six foot tall and was wearing a long sleeved, green sweater with dark blue Dickey’s. He stood with his shoulders back and squared, the man had lightly tanned skin. What was stranger still than the sweater and heavy pants on such a hot day was the black beanie that he sported on top of his head.

“Can I help you?”

The man looked straight into Leif’s blue eyes and for a strange moment he felt like the man was looking into him, calculating and measuring something intangible. As their gazes met each other, even though the security door obstructed the clarity of Leif’s view, Leif somehow knew the man had gray eyes. Then he smiled, his perfect white teeth gleamed bright enough to make it seem like he had a light in his mouth instead of teeth.

“I’m sorry to bother you sir, but I need to ask you a few questions.”

The man with the gray eyes reached into his sweater pocket and Leif had a terrifying vision of him pulling out a gun and being shot as shards of the security door marred his face. Instead the man pulled out a black, square badge holder; he flipped it open and held it against the screen. Leif barely got a glance at it before he put it away again, for all Leif could tell it looked official.

“I’m Lieutenant Detective Lux Tetra, I’m here regarding a pending investigation of a nature that I’m not allowed to divulge.”

Leif didn’t remember anyone following him to his apartment and by the time he had gotten in the door the detective should have only been a step or two behind him.

“How can I help you detective?”

The man leaned a little closer to try to peer into his apartment, after a quick scan he seemed to be satisfied that whatever it was that he was looking for wasn’t among the random piles of laundry and dishes.

“I only have a few questions for you; my agency would appreciate any cooperation that you could give to us. Where were you at around 12:00 a.m.?”

The detective pulled out a small writing pad and Leif did nothing to hide is exasperation, “I know how this may sound, but I don’t remember.”

“Really and how is it that you don’t recall where you were at that time?”

Leif fiddled with the piece of paper in his hand, “Because I spent the whole day getting drunk, when I woke up I was in Oakhaven Cemetery.”

The detectives eyes narrowed slightly, “And do you recall why you woke up in a cemetery?”

Leif watched him as he jotted down the shorthand notes, “I honestly don’t know, the whole night was a blur like I said, one thing is for certain…it was the last place I wanted to be.”

The short, blue, stubby pencil made a scratching sound against the paper. “And when you woke up were you alone?”

“No there was some woman there; she claimed to be there with me the whole night.”

The detective stopped writing for a moment and looked up. “What was the woman’s name?”

For some reason Leif had the feeling that something was wrong with this whole scenario, he was too much like the Hollywood version of an undercover detective – minus the trench coat and good intentions.

“What precinct did you say you work at?”

Mr. Tetra’s eyes narrowed again, “I didn’t, now did the woman give you a name or not?”




So here it is, I know it's a little slow right now but I'm sure you all know how that reader/character honeymoon goes. Something to keep in mind is that unless specifically stated otherwise all DP suggestions are only for Leif and Wendy (where applicable). Obviously the DP's here should only involve Leif, so suggest away.

[Andolyn]

I've wanted to read this FOREVER, Emperor! and i'll just say i'm not AT ALL disappointed with this first chapter. can't wait to read the rest! =)

[Emperor]

At first when I saw a post here in chapter one I was like, "Wait! What?" Then I was like "Yay!"

Thank you so much for reading Andolyn.

[Andolyn]

Haha! Not at all! Like I said, I've been wanting to for a looooong time just haven't gotten around to it. Lol!