Overly Dramatic Theater Episode 1: The Keening of the Kenmore by Cosmo You are on a quest to replace the Dishwasher of Great Elegance with the Used Kenmore of Klenliness. Abandon quest
For months now you have toiled under the drudgery of the most heinous of nightly chores: DISHWASHING. As you stare at your pruney hands your mind drifts back to the fateful evening where your nightmare began.
Long ago in the before time the mighty Dishwasher of Great Elegance would lovingly wash the nightly dishes. With a satisfied purr the dishes would be cleaned and sanitized. This Dishwasher had served well for many years before this night when the Gremlins of Incongruity made their way in to the house. The Gremlins built a nest in the heart of the Dishwasher, its great Motor and proceeded to wreak their havoc upon it. Dripping its lifeblood of electrons to the floor the Dishwasher of Great Elegance shrieked and was then silent. The smell of burning insulation and broken dreams filled the air as you fell to your knees, bemoaning your fate to all of the gods.
You waken from your reverie to find the dishes washed and drying. Though you are done for tonight you know the next night will be the same.
Plodding off to catch a scant few hours of sleep before awakening again to the same misery you are stopped as the phone rings. You debate on if its even worth picking up before finally answering it.
'Hello?'
'Greetings, young one. Rumor has it that your Dishwasher has broken down. Perhaps you would like another one? It just so happens that I have acquired a new Dishwasher so my old one is free for the taking. It may be a bit loud but will likely suit your needs.'
You recognize the gravelly voice of the Crone of Dubious Morals and Questionable Hygiene on the other end of the line. Knowing that her intentions are always questionable you think long and hard before answering. If you accept there will be a hidden cost.
