 |
 |
 |
 |
|
| Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna
Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Topics: 58
Posts: 2567
Location: USA
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
 Posted: Fri Dec 30, 2005 6:03 pm Post subject: Chapter 6: Obligations |
 |
|
Chapter 6
The sticky stain continued to crawl across his chest and down his midriff, and Jakeen felt an even larger wetness creep along his back. He stumbled forward, inexplicably nearer his opponent. Sheva halted her assault and backed away from him, clearly wishing to maintain the distance between them.
Jakeen’s mind clouded, pain and loss of blood weighing heavily upon him. His thoughts raced far away from the arena, into the fields of his father’s farm. He did not want to go back there. He had to get back to the Wormy Dog to play that evening, or else Mace would be angry that Jakeen failed to earn his wage and keep.
He continued his unfocused wandering, stumbling about the battlefield searching for an egress. The exit lay just beyond Sheva, and he made a few determined steps in that direction. Sheva continued to move away from his advance, abandoning her magical efforts in an attempt to avoid his closing the distance between them.
The stout wooden tables and worn chairs of the tavern shimmered into existence in the arena, a construct of his weary mind. Jakeen smiled as the dimly lit atmosphere of the Wormy Dog replaced the dusty earth of the battlefield. Only one patron stood in the tavern, and she didn’t appear thirsty. He’d change that.
He played softly on his lyre, the notes issuing forth imbued with magic. Sheva concentrated once more, her brow furrowed with effort and her eyes laughing at Jakeen’s defenseless form playing in the arena. The earth floated up to her palms and began hardening into deadly projectiles, and Sheva smiled in assured victory. Jakeen continued to play.
He grew thirsty, listening to those gentle notes dripping from his fingertips, but still the patron hadn’t ordered a drink. He redoubled his efforts, putting soul into his playing, seizing the magic in the pattern and wrapping the woman in the music. She was smiling at him, a nasty grimace that he didn’t exactly like.
Her wrists moved, the ill-formed stones dissolving into grains of sand and then reforming again, the swirling clouds of suspended earth defying Sheva’s control. She sent the spray of pebbles and grit towards Jakeen, before coughing and clutching at her throat. The sand stung his eyes, but he didn’t need to see to play, and he continued the notes to increase her thirst.
Sheva gasped for breath, her parched throat closing and allowing only a horrid hacking. If he wanted to play a game like that, she could accommodate him. Although unable to concentrate enough to form compacted stones, Sheva could still send the earth towards him, and she did this with as much enthusiasm as her thirsty mind could muster. Grit and sand churned around her and she sent it towards Jakeen.
The stinging sand swirled about him like an angry storm cloud, sticking to his face at the edges of his watering eyes. Another pattern floated into his mind, the notes for wind beckoning for him to play them. Jakeen listened to their summons, and played vigorously. No longer conscious of the battlefield nor stood in his imaginary tavern, Jakeen relinquished all awareness to the magic of the music he played.
A monstrous column of wind gathered up Sheva’s cloud of sand and grit, screeching in savage fury as it churned towards her. Doubled over and grasping her neck, Sheva wheezed out one last surprised gasp and her eyes bulged in terror. The wind picked her up and her own abrasive gravel scoured her skin.
Jakeen stopped playing, the music fading and his ragged breathing replacing the sound. Sheva fell to the ground with a thud, and her own sand buried her under a shallow knoll. The next few moments seemed unbelievably long as Jakeen blinked to clear his watering eyes, and then stared at the mound of dirt with Sheva’s slender hand jutting from it. He jerked as the announcer’s booming voice startled him.
“CONTESTANT JAKEEN WINS!”
With that he went to one knee, before succumbing to darkness.
**
Jakeen woke with a groan, his chest bound tightly and throbbing. He felt disoriented and thirsty, and his head swirled maddeningly when he sat up. He drank the whole of a glass of water from a table beside the bed, before cautiously standing and drawing curtains aside revealing a small window.
Darkness greeted him from outside the window, and a small spattering of stars twinkled in the night sky. “Shit, Mace will throttle me!”
He pulled on his bloodied shirt, wincing with the effort. Gathering his belongings, he headed towards the door, where a kindly woman stopped him before he managed to completely exit.
“You need to rest a bit longer, hon,” she stated softly, pushing him gently towards the bed.
“But I’ve obligations,” he protested ineffectually, landing on the mattress with a huff.
He lay back on the feather pillow and stared morosely at the ceiling. How was he going to explain this to Mace?
Poll: What next?
Remain at the clinic until properly dismissed, then go explain the situation to Mace 6
Remain at the clinic until properly dismissed, then avoid the Wormy Dog and try to earn a living another way 0
Sneak out of the clinic and make your way to the tavern as soon as possible 2
Sneak out of the clinic and avoid Mace, try to earn money some other way 1
Try to keep a very low profile, in case the family/fans of the other contestants want to hurt you 0
Last edited by ethereal_fauna on Thu Jan 26, 2006 6:10 am; edited 3 times in total
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
 |
|
 |
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Eragon\'s Ego
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Fri Dec 30, 2005 8:31 pm Post subject: |
|
|
MAYBEY HE COULD show mace his scars, then play for him, or find another tavern. i liked that you used wind and turned er projectiles at her. the thirst thing was a surprise too I like that. Good going.
you clearly have a tallent that should not be wasted. 
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Ingrothechundyer
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Fri Dec 30, 2005 9:27 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Nice job1
I think he needs to find out more about where he is right now. Is it a place for the contestants that are still in the battle to stay? Any possibility of just resting and not having to work for a living?
Whatever he finds going to mace and explaining is something that I think should be done but only after he has answers.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Shady Stoat
Elder
Joined: 02 Oct 2005
Topics: 76
Posts: 2950
Location: England
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 2:17 am Post subject: |
|
|
Nicely handled Jakeen!
I think he should lie still for a little while, try to find out where he is and who the woman is.
Afterwards, when he goes back to the Wormy Dog, the situation may not be as black as he expects. For one thing, Mace has no-one to replace him with. I doubt whether Jakeen will be paid for the night's work he missed, but neither will he be fired, because he's too darned valuable.
For another, the fact that Jakeen has survived the first round of the Battle to the End is bound to attract the attention of all kinds of people. I wouldn't be surprised if the Wormy Dog is full of people who want to take a closer look at the spellsinger. Mace certainly isn't going to pass that sort of publicity up. (I hope!) 
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Eragon\'s Ego
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 6:56 am Post subject: |
|
|
ummmm... isnt not working just plain out of charachter, because he is really loyal and, by now he probbably feels guiltier than pres. clinton did when he said "i didn't inhale." but he should definatley try to get a more experienced teacher than yahoo. but the problem with going to the bar is that maybey there will be people (relatives & ect.)who knew Sheva will find out that he plays there and be angered by the fact that she is now beyond help(dead). *given she has relatives and peopje who care for her* But other than that i think that the people at the pub will be more than willing to have the crouds there and the overly obliged Jakeen to play for them.
P.S. I know my spelling blows, but i just hate morning posting to, but i jusst awoke 9:30 AM here (ohio time) . 
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Eragon\'s Ego
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 7:05 am Post subject: |
|
|
(Quote shady stoat)
I think he should lie still for a little while, try to find out where he is and who the woman is.
^ i mean this in all due respect but Jakeen is a pinch simplistic, and feels verry guilty for not playing at the pub, so he probably thinks that the barkeep is very haughty right now, but i may be wrong, seeing as how jakeen won, all the peopleat the pub maybey they want to let him rest to have his full potential showcased at therir bar. (sorry about that sentence when i colided people and at, the stupid overtype)
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna
Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Topics: 58
Posts: 2567
Location: USA
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:38 am Post subject: |
|
|
Note: To better stay on topic, I have split part of this thread and moved it here.
_________________
The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
jnmrcs
Builder
Joined: 30 Apr 2005
Topics: 6
Posts: 1274
Location: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas...
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:40 am Post subject: |
|
|
As I saw we have more than one thing to think about.
First, as some have said before, where we are? Can we stay there without preocupation at all? We need answers but we need rest more than answers. If he didn't rest at all he could lost the next fight. Lets rest and try to find some answers.
Second. What about the people? What about the bar? People could love him because he won, but as someone said Shiva got his fans too. Not only she there are more contestans (or whatever it is) on the tournament. Will be safe for him continue working? Should his body and strenght leave to him do that?
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna
Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Topics: 58
Posts: 2567
Location: USA
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:49 am Post subject: |
|
|
Jakeen is still at the arena, in the clinic there getting medical attention. He doesn't have the money to hire a skilled magician to heal is wounds, so the Lyceum will patch him up a bit as a registered contestant.
Good thoughts on what might turn out to be his new-found celebrity. Keep the discussion going and the ideas flowing.
_________________
The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Eragon\'s Ego
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Sun Jan 01, 2006 10:57 am Post subject: |
|
|
whell yes, he will be famous, so there will oviously be:
A: Sheva's family hiring assasins to kill him.
B: poppuratzi wanting interviews.
C:autographs.
Q:no time to sleep. 
Whatever comes after Q: his concience telling to keep fighting AND to go back to the wormy dog pub.
because not going back and not feeling hella guilty is fairly far out of charachter.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Eragon\'s Ego
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Sun Jan 01, 2006 10:59 am Post subject: |
|
|
Sorry, jnmrcs but sheva's a girl, not a dude. 
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Shady Stoat
Elder
Joined: 02 Oct 2005
Topics: 76
Posts: 2950
Location: England
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Tue Jan 03, 2006 3:45 am Post subject: |
|
|
In regards to Jakeen's new-found celebrity, it might be time for him to find a better place to earn himself some money. Perhaps he could hire himself out as a tutor to would-be spellsingers. Or just start a bidding-war between Taverns, to see who would be willing to offer the best terms for him?
Now that his talents are growing, so should his aspirations be
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna
Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Topics: 58
Posts: 2567
Location: USA
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Tue Jan 03, 2006 10:40 am Post subject: |
|
|
I'm really not sure how much celebrity he'll get, considering that there are many contestants winning and losing in the arena at present. I could see a few congratulatory remarks from acquantences at the pub, but for the most part Jakeen's battle wasn't overly stunning.
And Mace isn't exactly a big softie. He's running a rough joint, and isn't going to be pleased if he's paying someone and giving them a place to stay, and that person shows up late for his shift. He's out to make a profit from people coming to watch the tournament, not coddle the contestants.
_________________
The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Eragon\'s Ego
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Tue Jan 03, 2006 12:40 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| when is the next chapter?
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna
Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Topics: 58
Posts: 2567
Location: USA
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Tue Jan 03, 2006 1:46 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| Eragon's Ego wrote: | | when is the next chapter? |
Discussion for this chapter will continue for a week or so, and then a poll will open for voting. Polling usually lasts a week, and the next chapter will come out sometime after that.
_________________
The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Eragon\'s Ego
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Tue Jan 03, 2006 4:19 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| shoot!!! i really needed something good to read.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna
Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Topics: 58
Posts: 2567
Location: USA
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Wed Jan 04, 2006 3:15 am Post subject: |
|
|
Wander around the streets of IF here. Plenty of good reading. 
_________________
The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
luvd
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Wed Jan 04, 2006 4:48 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| ethereal_fauna wrote: | I'm really not sure how much celebrity he'll get, considering that there are many contestants winning and losing in the arena at present. I could see a few congratulatory remarks from acquantences at the pub, but for the most part Jakeen's battle wasn't overly stunning.
And Mace isn't exactly a big softie. He's running a rough joint, and isn't going to be pleased if he's paying someone and giving them a place to stay, and that person shows up late for his shift. He's out to make a profit from people coming to watch the tournament, not coddle the contestants. |
Darn, extra washing up for the lad? Living a double life isn't fun. Just ask Spiderman or Clark Kent  Some how I think Mace is going to know about the arena. Jakeen is a fool if he thinks he will get away from it. Be interesting to see how Mace snaps him back into place
| Shady Stoat wrote: | In regards to Jakeen's new-found celebrity, it might be time for him to find a better place to earn himself some money. Perhaps he could hire himself out as a tutor to would-be spellsingers. Or just start a bidding-war between Taverns, to see who would be willing to offer the best terms for him?
Now that his talents are growing, so should his aspirations be |
I don't know. He did get a right slapping. I'm not too sure I'd go to him for lessons just yet
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Cowofdoom666
Respected Citizen
Joined: 23 Nov 2004
Topics: 6
Posts: 963
Location: Essex, England
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2006 11:28 am Post subject: |
|
|
| I'm sure Mace wouldn't mind if he got something out of it, think about it, Mace has an arena contetant working for him! They already beat the living *carp* out of another contestant, don't you think people would want to come just to hear him play? Sure, if Jarkeen gets a note wrong the Tavern might explode or something, but what is there to lose?
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
luvd
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2006 1:13 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| Oo that's a thought :biggrin: Mace nobbling Jakeen chances I don't know why or where I've got the idea but I always see Mace as a bittered person
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna
Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Topics: 58
Posts: 2567
Location: USA
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sat Jan 14, 2006 7:54 am Post subject: |
|
|
Polls up...vote!
_________________
The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Eragon\'s Ego
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Mon Jan 16, 2006 1:39 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| why would you stay at the clinic, what if the people there are mean, or if they work for other contestants, or poison his food?
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Ingrothechundyer
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Mon Jan 16, 2006 6:05 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Hmm - He needs to sleep to regenerate his mana for the next fight
- If they wanted to kill him they probally would have done so by now
- It would be nice to find out how badly injured he was in the last fight before racing out into the streets
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Mother Goose
Respected Citizen
Joined: 09 May 2004
Topics: 2
Posts: 511
Location: Connecticut
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2006 8:24 am Post subject: |
|
|
Makes sense, Ingro.
Maybe there's a way to get a message to Mace - does the clinic have some such service, since I can't think of anybody else he could send it with?
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Sorrow_A
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Thu Jan 19, 2006 4:18 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| Well, I voted, but I'm a loner in sneaking back to the wormy dog...It just makes sense to me, y'know.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
jnmrcs
Builder
Joined: 30 Apr 2005
Topics: 6
Posts: 1274
Location: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas...
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Thu Jan 19, 2006 4:24 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| Sneak out isn't good. You are not fully healed (I hope that was right writed) and you could get worse on the try.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna
Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Topics: 58
Posts: 2567
Location: USA
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Thu Jan 19, 2006 4:28 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Right writed Now I like the way that sounds. Yes, your expression is correctly written.
_________________
The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
luvd
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2006 1:39 am Post subject: |
|
|
Stay till his fully healed? And how longs that going to take? The longer he is held up in bed then there's less chance of getting away with it Some how I don't think Mace is going to turn up at his bed side with a bunch of grapes and a card.
I know making a brake for it with as far as anyone knows internal bleeding is stupid, but it all depends on how badly he want to learn his craft from Mace. Oh come on, hands up all those who have done really stupid things when we were young.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
jnmrcs
Builder
Joined: 30 Apr 2005
Topics: 6
Posts: 1274
Location: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas...
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2006 1:44 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Stupid things is one thing but suicide things... mmm Ihave never done it (of course if I was I should be death by now  )
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Shady Stoat
Elder
Joined: 02 Oct 2005
Topics: 76
Posts: 2950
Location: England
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2006 1:50 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| luvd wrote: | | Oh come on, hands up all those who have done really stupid things when we were young. |
Why stop at when you're young? I do stupid things all the time
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna
Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Topics: 58
Posts: 2567
Location: USA
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Thu Jan 26, 2006 6:14 am Post subject: |
|
|
Poll is over, with the decision to remain at the clinic until properly dismissed, and then go explain the situation to Mace. Since we're remaining at the clinic for awhile, I'll take Mother Goose's suggestion to check if the clinic has a messenger service into account as I write.
If there are any more comments or suggestions for what you'd like to see coming up for Jakeen, feel free to post them.
_________________
The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
luvd
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Sat Jan 28, 2006 10:09 am Post subject: |
|
|
| Shady Stoat wrote: | | luvd wrote: | | Oh come on, hands up all those who have done really stupid things when we were young. |
Why stop at when you're young? I do stupid things all the time |
I found the only real difference now is I worry AFTER I've done it Never bothered me when I was young but now  Still, it doesn't really stop me though.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
