|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Chinaren Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005 Topics: 340 Posts: 8882 Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
dragon_fire372 Citizen
Joined: 24 Oct 2005 Topics: 4 Posts: 258 Location: Montana Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Thu Dec 08, 2005 7:34 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Surreal is the perfect description. And yes, that is to be considered a compliment
You'll never be able to master your fear if you don't confront it. I somehow suspect this is more that a dream, but even so, I think you should investigate a bit more. _________________
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing ~ Edmund Burke
Sans Dieu Rien Without God, Nothing
Visions of Shadow - 2nd part of Uncertain Quests! Chapter Two
Dreamwalker - Relocated to Linear Lane Sixth Chapter
Linear Story Nightrobber Now Complete!
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Fri Dec 09, 2005 12:26 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Ok, got the poll up, so vote away you happy crazy people! :biggrin: _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Chinaren Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005 Topics: 340 Posts: 8882 Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Shady Stoat Elder
Joined: 02 Oct 2005 Topics: 76 Posts: 2950 Location: England Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2005 12:54 am Post subject: |
|
|
me three
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Ingrothechundyer Guest
Items
|
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2005 5:57 am Post subject: |
|
|
me four...
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
dragon_fire372 Citizen
Joined: 24 Oct 2005 Topics: 4 Posts: 258 Location: Montana Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 8:30 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Option 4 all the way!
<cough> um, yeah... _________________
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing ~ Edmund Burke
Sans Dieu Rien Without God, Nothing
Visions of Shadow - 2nd part of Uncertain Quests! Chapter Two
Dreamwalker - Relocated to Linear Lane Sixth Chapter
Linear Story Nightrobber Now Complete!
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 4:31 am Post subject: |
|
|
Ok, thats pretty conclusive I think, so on to the next chapter!
However, as my internet at home has decided to die and it may be a little while (a few days at the most, hopefully) before I can post again, so please dont be alarmed about my absence! See ya soon!
:biggrin: _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2005 5:53 am Post subject: |
|
|
Okay, internets back up and running (as you can plainly see) and I don't have very much to do tomorrow, so hopefully i'll bring myself to write the next chapter. _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Thu Dec 22, 2005 1:17 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Ok, here you go!
The Voyage - Chapter 5
----------------------------------------
The fumes had begun to make me retch and hurl, and I decided that I had no intention of finding whatever the horrific stench was emanating from. I resolved to face my fears, and decided that confronting the figure in the room. I stumbled back up the ladder to the main deck, my eyes watering from the stinging odour. After pausing for a few moments to catch my breath I proceeded up to the upper deck. As I approached the door to that wretched corridor, the marrow-freezing chill once again swept over my body. I hesitated at the entrance, fear penetrating to my very core. What unknown horrors lurked in that room? I still did not know exactly what was going on; if this was real or not. But whatever it was, something had to be done, or I may never wake up from this hellish dream-scape. Suddenly, there was a piercing inhuman cry from below, and I ran to the rails to see. I looked down onto the main deck and as I did I recoiled in horror. From the hatch leading to the lower deck some unimaginable horror was shambling. Its form was that of a huge hulking man, but the skin was bloated and yellow. Its, for lack of a better word, head, was like that of a huge fly, with bulbous eyes glistening and dripping proboscis slithering in and out of its tube-like mouth. Its ragged arms hung down to the floor, and trailed behind it as it shuffled toward the stairs leading to the upper deck! I panicked, unable to discern a route by which I could evade the blasphemous horror that was slowly and terribly heading for me. The only way I could go would be into that blasted corridor.
I fled into the imperceptible darkness, concluding that any disturbing being in that dripping room could not be as terrible as that shambling horror outside. I ran to the door of my old cabin, and wrenched at it with all my might. But it did not budge; locked tight from the inside. By now I could hear the terrible lumbering footsteps coming up the ladder to the upper deck. I frantically tried the captain’s cabin door, which was also locked fast. The beast was onto the deck outside now, its heavy steps clearly audible now. I ran down the corridor, trying every door as I went. But as I feared, none would move. As I reached that last door, I could hear the fiend at the doorway. In a last vain attempt, dashing all previous fears about the place, I tried the door. It slid slowly inward, and I followed it, slamming it shut even before I had turned around. But as I closed the door, I felt the warmth of the sun on my back, and I heard the cries and calls of the crew. I turned around and was shocked to find myself standing in the middle of the main deck. That room, the creature, all had vanished as if nothing had happened. Almost sick with relief, but at the same time I was disturbed. What was happening on this voyage? What was happening to me?
As I stood bewildered, one of the crew ran up to me, a young cabin boy called Nathaniel, I believe.
“Sir, Sir, have you heard?”
“Heard what boy?”
“The Captain, Sir, he’s dead!”
“What? How on earth could that happen? You better not be lying to me boy?”
“No Sir, Bates found him this morning. In the mess hall Sir, slumped on the table. All dried out, like he’d been dead weeks. Stench was awful, Bates said e’ almost fainted.”
The colour drained from my face, and sweat began forming on my brow. How could this be?
“You alright Sir, yor’ lookin’ a bit pale?”
“No no, I’m fine. How terrible. What on earth happened? Does anyone know?”
“Well, Terry said it was witchcraft, but we all know he’s a wan…er, sorry Sir, getting carried away. Mr Coleridge has asked if you would mind talking with him? He’s in the Captain’s mess hall.”
“Thank you Nathan. Go tell him that I will come to him immediately.”
“Very good Sir, thank you sir.”
As he ran off, I paused a moment, to ponder my next course of action. Undoubtedly, my dream had something to do with the captain’s unfortunate demise, but should I tell the new acting Captain Mr Coleridge about my ‘premonition’. It would be a long shot for him to even believe the tale, and even if he did, would he not deem me mad or heretical. I would have to choose quickly… _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Shady Stoat Elder
Joined: 02 Oct 2005 Topics: 76 Posts: 2950 Location: England Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Thu Dec 22, 2005 1:55 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I don't think he should tell the new Captain about his dream, or about the original sighting. It would do no good and make him think of you as disturbed. Maybe even get you hurt or killed the next time something bad happens to one of the crew.
Tell him nothing, but try and hang around the rest of the crew a little. Pick up any gossip, talk to people who seem quiet or uneasy. See if you can find yourself a potential ally who could back you up in the future.
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Ingrothechundyer Guest
Items
|
Posted: Thu Dec 22, 2005 3:11 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I agree with stoat
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Sat Dec 24, 2005 7:22 am Post subject: |
|
|
Merry Christmas everyone! And a happy new year! :biggrin: _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Thu Dec 29, 2005 8:23 am Post subject: |
|
|
Ok, after reading through my last chapter, I wasn't too pleased with how it came out. I promise to work much harder on the next one.
Please don't hate me....... _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Guest
Items
|
Posted: Thu Dec 29, 2005 9:20 am Post subject: |
|
|
I love your chapters, including the last one. We could do with more gothic horror on the site, and your story is very stylish and descriptive. Don't be disheartened, we still love you (or at least like you a lot)
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Shady Stoat Elder
Joined: 02 Oct 2005 Topics: 76 Posts: 2950 Location: England Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Thu Dec 29, 2005 9:22 am Post subject: |
|
|
Okay, I admit it, the last post was me.
*chants 'must remember to log in' repeatedly to self*
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Fri Dec 30, 2005 4:28 am Post subject: |
|
|
Ok then. Thanks Ms. Stoat.
And I hate you too Lordy :biggrin: _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Tue Jan 10, 2006 2:00 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Ok, im sorry it's been a while since my last post here; the combined battle charges of christmas and new years, then doing my linear story (which I suggest you read ) took up my time. Hopefully I'll get a chance to write it up tomorrow, if not then definitely friday.
See you then my IFian chums! _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Tue Jan 10, 2006 2:02 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Wait, I need to poll 1st, sorry.
Off I go..... _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Tue Jan 10, 2006 2:07 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Ok, people should be able to vote quickly, as I wrote the last chapter a little while ago.
Well, get to it...... _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Chinaren Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005 Topics: 340 Posts: 8882 Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Sun Jan 15, 2006 8:59 am Post subject: |
|
|
Ok, I've gotten my stories stickied, so get posting peeps! When I do the next chapter that is, lol. _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Thu Jan 19, 2006 11:39 am Post subject: |
|
|
Only 4 votes......
Ah well, I'm busy this weekend, so if people hurry and post their vote (cos' the poll has expired) then I'll include it when I get down to writing the next chapter.
So get voting folks! Please _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Smee Revered IFian
Joined: 16 Oct 2004 Topics: 166 Posts: 5215 Location: UK Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Thu Jan 19, 2006 12:25 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Hey Sol.
I think for the first time ever there's a nominated story that I haven't even looked at, let alone post. I usually get in there somewhere.
I don't know how it's slipped me by for so long, but I'll soon rectify it and start catching up tomorrow - I'll be joining in soon.
Happy Writing. _________________ The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Smee Revered IFian
Joined: 16 Oct 2004 Topics: 166 Posts: 5215 Location: UK Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2006 6:00 am Post subject: |
|
|
Hey Sol,
Well I enjoyed my lunch whilst catching up.
I must say, I do like your style of english in this story. I guess the formal language just appeals to me, but it is very nice to read.
However, I've chosen a pretty bad time to join in - what a tricky decision point.
I think he should keep quiet for now - if something else odd happens then hopefully someone else will notice and he won't be the only 'crazy' one.
Keep it coming,
Happy Writing. _________________ The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Araex Guest
Items
|
Posted: Sat Jan 21, 2006 7:03 am Post subject: |
|
|
Hiya...
Awesome story... love the style, and the description, and like Smee I really enjoy the way that the story is seen through the boy's eyes [I can't remember his name... do we know it?], and the way that our perception of the world is changed through his eyes, like a lense almost.
--------------------------------------
There are a few points that confuse me, particularly in this most recent part: the shambling horror was seen in a dream, then we went into the room and found ourselves awake on deck?
Or have I got this wrong...
Another thing, from chapter 3/4?:
"1st mate Trevor Coleridge, who I had not spoken to at that point, a very likeable man, nothing at all like the captain, whose coarseness and informality repelled me. He spoke well and his attire was always neat and clean, which I say is quite an achievement at sea!"
You make him sound attractive, and the two converse easily, yet you say that we're repelled by him. Was this a mistake... or are the two so alike that they are apart?
--------------------------------------
Anyhow... my current thinking is that Coleridge is a sorceror... he would have a cabin near the captain, and could summon this shambling demon. Therefore, I vote we don't tell him jack, as if he knows we know, we'd be in "big doo doo dis time."
Araex
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Sat Jan 21, 2006 7:16 am Post subject: |
|
|
Ok, to clarify on the points Araex got confused on:
- All of this was a dream. The point at which he wakes up is after he has closed the door in that room (which he entered in the dream state) and then turns around. He hasn't really been in that room, just in his mind, and in fact he had been sleep walking, and ended up in the middle (main) deck.
- And on the 2nd point, I actually said the captain's "coarseness and informality" repelled him, not the 1st mate.
Hope that's clarified your concerns Araex. Don't hesitate to ask anything else, I'll answer them as best I can. _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Araex Guest
Items
|
Posted: Sun Jan 22, 2006 3:38 am Post subject: |
|
|
Thanks for that... it was really the sleep walking bit that got me all confussled.
However: In that case, we've already established a relationship with Coleridge, and he seems quite a nice guy. Therefore, maybe we should come out with the truth and tell him.
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 2:38 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Ok, the majority appears to have gone for keeping schtumm, so I'm gonna get down to writing the chapter tomorrow.
If anyone else wants to get thier opinion in, there's still time! Post it and I'll look at it before I get onto the writing the chapter. _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
dragon_fire372 Citizen
Joined: 24 Oct 2005 Topics: 4 Posts: 258 Location: Montana Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 8:28 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I was so certain that I had voted for this, but apparently I didn't. <Runs around screaming, "I'm losing my mind ARGH!">
Anyways...hurry with the next chapter! I'm glad the last option won. Keep it up! _________________
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing ~ Edmund Burke
Sans Dieu Rien Without God, Nothing
Visions of Shadow - 2nd part of Uncertain Quests! Chapter Two
Dreamwalker - Relocated to Linear Lane Sixth Chapter
Linear Story Nightrobber Now Complete!
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 7:24 am Post subject: |
|
|
Sure thing Dragon, lol!
I'm gonna get writing the chapter now folks!
And I'm going to try really hard to get my paragraph spacing as user friendly as my brain will let me! _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Solomon Birch Honored Citizen
Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Topics: 18 Posts: 1562 Location: England..... but Japan beckons..... Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 1:10 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Right, here we are; new chapter my luvlies
The Voyage - Chapter 6
----------------------------------------------------------------
Deciding that the best course of action would be to keep quiet about my… for lack of a better word, premonition, I gathered myself up as best I could and proceeded to the Captain’s dining hall.
The first thing I noticed as I stepped down into the lower deck was that eye-burning stench. It stopped me in my tracks, and I wondered how Deadlock’s body could make such a disgusting odour after being dead for such a small time. I strode into the dining room and discovered Coleridge slumped over the table in the centre. Fearing the worst I ran to his side. Then I noticed the empty whisky bottle lying on its side next to the drooling fools head.
Shaking the drunken man violently, I eventually managed to elicit a response from him despite his induced stupor
“Coleridge you fool! Wake up!”
“What…. Leave me alone! I’m the captain now….” Mumbled the intoxicated former 1st mate, spittle flying from his reeking mouth. Finally losing my temper, I seized the empty glass bottle and smashed it on the wall behind Coleridge!
Shards of glass falling to the floor, I dropped the broken bottle neck on the table and approached the stirring Coleridge. The side door slammed open, and Bates ran into the room
“Sir! What happened? Are you ok?”
“I’m fine! The bottle rolled off the table and hit the wall. He’s the one we should be worried about” I said, indicating the again unconscious form on the table.
“Yes, he does seem to be taking Captain Deadlock’s death rather badly. Can’t blame him though can you; what a nasty way to go….”
“Where’s the body now Bates?” a demanded of the man, eager to get some information about the occurrence from someone.
“When Coleridge found him this morning he got some of the other sailors to wrap it up in an old sail-cloth and toss it overboard. The smell, Sir, it was so bad. We couldn’t have kept it. Imagine finding that Sir; it was all dried up and crus..”
“Yes Bates, thank you. Nathaniel, the cabin boy, told me. Did anyone examine it though? Surely there was some indication to what had happened?” I inquired, hoping that someone on this ship had the sense to examine the body, no matter how bad the smell was. But my hopes were misplaced; the only one on this ship who had any sense, besides me, was the captain. And he was dead
“No Sir, the smell was so awful they just carried the body off and tossed it over the side. Then Coleridge ordered the room scrubbed and that he wanted to be left alone. So we did. Can’t argue with a superior officer can you, Sir?”
“No, Bates that is something you cannot do. Now, go and find something that should wake up Coleridge over there”
“Yes Sir, right away!”
After my ‘meeting’ with Coleridge, I began feeling the fever returning. Terrified that the dreams, if that was what they were, would return, I had Bates make me a laudanum* mixture that would help me to sleep deeply and without the disturbance of those darkly vivid nightmares that have plagued me so much recently. Reading a little Shakespeare to help myself get off to sleep, I then proceeded to drink down the painfully strong mixture and lay down to rest. I was immediately thankful for the dulling sensation that the laudanum created, for I immediately began to feel darkness closing around my mind.
Green haze fogged my vision. My head felt like the ship’s waterlogged hull; constantly battered by waves. I stumbled around in the dark, trying to find something to get a hold of, to stop myself from falling. But my hand touched only air, and I slipped to the floor. Except there was no floor to fall towards, and I continued to tumble into the darkness.
Landing on something soft, I assumed I had fallen back into my bunk. I tired to open my eyes, but as I did, sharp light flooded in and I shut them tightly again. No longer sure if I was even in my cabin, I felt around, trying to discern where on the ship I was. My fingers closed around a small metal object, cold to the touch, that lay to my right.
Then, from above, I heard a low moan. It was carried on the wind that blew around the ship and chilled me to my core. Slowly opening my eyes, letting them get adjusted to the dark, I sat up slowly.
I was in the ship’s hold! There were lanterns sitting on benches and tables all around; dozens of them, that brightly lit up the large space. I looked down to see one of the pistols grasped in my hand, its cold steel barrel feeling oddly light in my palm. Standing up, I heard another moan coming from above.
The darkness was thick, but the lantern drew enough of it away that I could still see my way. Another moan, this time higher in pitch, came from the sailor’s mess hall to my left. I approached the oaken doors, damp with sea water, and slowly pushed one open.
Inside the floor was awash with seawater. It rose above my ankles and the smell of the salt assailed my nostrils, the sharp smell making me gag. Strange that even after all those weeks at sea (not to mention the months spent on my way to Australia), this smell would affect me so….? Trudging down the long hall, I felt something bump hard into my left leg. I looked down, and to my horror saw the body of the adolescent cabin boy Nathaniel. I pushed the body away with my heel, sickened by the corpse of one so young. But as I stepped away, I felt more hard objects push against my legs.
The bulging, pale forms of dozens of bodies, all bloated as if they had lain in that brackish water for weeks. Their blank faces stared up at me, eyes rolled back, mocking me! I pushed away from them, wading forwards.
Suddenly, I heard the strangled moan coming from the store cupboard in the wall on my left. I drew the pistol and slowly turned the handle…
The door creaked open, and the moaning stopped. Shining the lantern into the dark enclosed space, I could make out Coleridge’s pale form. He looked out at me with bloodshot eyes, stark terror registering in his face
“Coleridge! What on earth has happened? Why are all these men dead? What the hell is going on man?” I demanded shakily, his distress making me feel uneasy.
“It was here, William. It was here. You have to help me. Please! It was in here.”
“What was man? Talk some sense! What came in? Did it do this?”
“The thing. Same thing that got the captain. It came in and it got them. Their screams! Oh god… their screams….”
I put the pistol back in my pocket, to stop it getting wet. More that a little disturbed by Coleridge’s ramblings, I grabbed his arm and led him out into the hallway.
This didn’t seem to be a dream again, though it certainly felt like one. Coleridge slumped to the floor against the wall, mumbling incoherently. I needed to decide what to do next. The only other living soul I had found so far had been reduced to a gibbering wreck. Whatever was out there, it was certainly not friendly, and if it could do that to all those men, I did not fancy my chances against it much. Coleridge would be no use, so I led him down to the hold, sitting him among some sacking and lighting a lantern so that he wouldn’t become even more frantic and afraid than he already was. I sat down on an upturned chest to think of what to do next…..
*Narcotic consisting of an alcohol solution of opium or any preparation in which opium is the main ingredient
-----------------------------------------
Ok, there ya go folks! Hope ya enjoyed that! :biggrin:
More open decision point that time, so I'm expecting some truly fantastic suggestions this time ! _________________ "Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
Last edited by Solomon Birch on Sat Jan 28, 2006 2:19 am; edited 1 time in total
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
LordoftheNight Revered IFian
Joined: 11 Aug 2005 Topics: 41 Posts: 5276 Location: Hell Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 4:47 pm Post subject: |
|
|
you got it done then, and sorted the spacings trouble out as well
there doesn't seem to be much that he can do, other than keep exploring causiously
either that, or try to go to sleep and hope you wake up back in your bed _________________ Punishment leads to Fear. Fear leads to Obedience. Obedience leads to Freedom. Therefore, Punishment leads to Freedom.
Ave Dominus Nox
A Fronte Praecipitium a Tergo Lupi
Blood Bowl
Scraping the Barrel
A Tale of Four Swords
Passion
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|