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jnmrcs Builder
Joined: 30 Apr 2005 Topics: 6 Posts: 1274 Location: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas... Items Legends
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Posted: Tue Nov 22, 2005 3:31 pm Post subject: Blood Price - Chapter 26: Taking care of what was left |
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Here will be a new storygame based on some characters that I had. It’s recommended that you read first the real begin of this story, this is the third one. That is Cadel’s Day and Reborn, in that order. Those 2 stories are on the Linear Stories Forum.
Also be prepared for some rules on this storygame. These rules are for the best of the story, for both of us (the author and the reader).
Rules:
1. Each chapter will have, at least, 300 words. With that I can give you some kind of guarantee that you will have something to read and not just some words to fulfill with the story.
2. After each chapter you will have 7 days to discuss about what is going on the story and to give me suggestions for the poll and feedback about the story. Remember to give explanations about what you think, you know a why. Please only post for the story, there is an Open Forum for the other things.
3. Each chapter will end with a poll (storygame rule) and this poll will have, at least, three selections. With this you will get some discussions about the poll. The poll will be posted after the time for the suggestions was closed. The poll will be on for 4 days.
4. The author (me) will not vote in the poll. In case of a draw the author will break it.
5. I hope that I can post the chapter 3 days after the poll was closed. Remember that English is not my native language, so it will be hard for me. After I posted I will edit it (with the help of my editor) if needed.
6. I will give prizes for the people who help on the story. (As I said, is for help to the story; not for the person who post more.) The winners will receive the privilege (I hope is a privilege) of give names of places, persons and that kind of thing. In case of a winner I will post the winner and what he/she will be doing for the story with some instructions or rules too. If necessary I will contact this person (PM) to give him\her more information (some information that maybe can compromise the story if everyone knows it). The winner will have about 3-5 days to post the part that I request from him\her. After those days I can’t guarantee that the post will be on the story.
I will start on November 30, to give time to anyone who hasn’t read the first 2 stories. Remember the rules and if you are not agreed with them, please, don’t participate then. Thanks and enjoy.
Note: Some changes to the rules have been made. (again)
Last edited by jnmrcs on Mon Jan 15, 2007 6:54 am; edited 60 times in total
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jnmrcs Builder
Joined: 30 Apr 2005 Topics: 6 Posts: 1274 Location: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas... Items Legends
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Posted: Tue Nov 22, 2005 3:40 pm Post subject: |
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The first one on winning in my stories is Fauna.
Thanks Fauna for all your help on my stories. As a prize you will be who decide the title of this storygame. Congratulations. I hope you continue helping me on this storygame too.
When you have the title please post it here. I will PM you with more information.
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Shogun Respected Citizen
Joined: 15 Aug 2005 Topics: 0 Posts: 628 Location: In your nightmares, feeding on your fears. Items Legends
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Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2005 5:09 pm Post subject: |
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Excellent, Excellent. I can't wait for the First Chapter jnmrcs! _________________ I'm ripped across the ditch, and settled in the dirt and I'm
Wiggled like a stitch, yet I'm the one who's hurt
Pay attention to your twisted little indiscretions
I've got no right to way, I'm just caught up all the battles
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Smee Revered IFian
Joined: 16 Oct 2004 Topics: 166 Posts: 5215 Location: UK Items Legends
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Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2005 10:15 pm Post subject: |
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I'm in the process of catching up with your linear stories and then I'll be on board too.
Happy Writing. _________________ The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
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Shady Stoat Elder
Joined: 02 Oct 2005 Topics: 76 Posts: 2950 Location: England Items Legends
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Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2005 1:01 am Post subject: |
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Count me in
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ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Topics: 58 Posts: 2567 Location: USA Items Legends
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Posted: Fri Nov 25, 2005 6:33 am Post subject: |
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I am so happy that you have decided to write your storygame. Our hero has went from despair as a man, to rebellion as a vampire, and now as players we can decide what path he chooses to take with this new existence that the vampire Kort has given him. What price is he willing to pay for his eternity?
My prize: To choose the title for this storygame
My title: Blood Price
_________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
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jnmrcs Builder
Joined: 30 Apr 2005 Topics: 6 Posts: 1274 Location: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas... Items Legends
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Posted: Fri Nov 25, 2005 10:39 am Post subject: |
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Thanks Fauna. I liked it so much that I will use part of what you write there to use it on the introduction. (of course I will use the quote , you deserve it)
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Shogun Respected Citizen
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Posted: Fri Nov 25, 2005 3:14 pm Post subject: |
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Change it around a bit:Blood Prince!
Blood Price is excellent too! _________________ I'm ripped across the ditch, and settled in the dirt and I'm
Wiggled like a stitch, yet I'm the one who's hurt
Pay attention to your twisted little indiscretions
I've got no right to way, I'm just caught up all the battles
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Shogun Respected Citizen
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Posted: Tue Nov 29, 2005 7:31 pm Post subject: |
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Um...can we got on to the intro or first chapter please, I think I grew a beard while i sat on my seat waiting in anticipation. :biggrin: _________________ I'm ripped across the ditch, and settled in the dirt and I'm
Wiggled like a stitch, yet I'm the one who's hurt
Pay attention to your twisted little indiscretions
I've got no right to way, I'm just caught up all the battles
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jnmrcs Builder
Joined: 30 Apr 2005 Topics: 6 Posts: 1274 Location: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas... Items Legends
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 3:43 am Post subject: Introduction |
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ethereal_fauna wrote: | I am so happy that you have decided to write your storygame. Our hero has went from despair as a man, to rebellion as a vampire, and now as players we can decide what path he chooses to take with this new existence that the vampire Kort has given him. What price is he willing to pay for his eternity?
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It has been some hours since he dispatched his supposed owners. Now he was alone and stunned, but very well prepared for his next step, at least he though so. He continued thinking about it. Revenge, is what he wished?
He was still on the lair where he understood that he has changed. He wasn’t anymore a human, he was a vampire now; he was reborn. On the lair he had shelter from the sun. Next to him were the corpses of what was his food, humans. Also there were the rest of what supposedly were his owners, now just dust...
He was laid on the ground trying to get some rest. But he has a lot of things on his mind. He was scared but with a lot of strength, with fear but with new powers to be used. He didn’t know what to do or where to go now. Maybe he has to kill himself because he was dead. He wasn’t anymore Cadel but he neither was Moswen.
He continued thinking about what to do now. He was a vampire but he didn’t like that. It was Kort fault because Kort sired him. He didn’t know if take advantage of being a vampire or just try to find revenge. In anyway he has to be very careful, if some vampire knew that the killed vampires he could be in problems.
He was alone and he didn’t know where to find other vampires. Maybe other vampires could teach him to live like that. Maybe they could help him to take a decision or maybe not.
He also didn’t know where to find humans. Maybe the humans could help him instead of the vampires. But maybe they wouldn’t help a vampire. In any way he could eat, at least.
Even his new name bothered him. He was so confused…
“Moswen, what kind of name is it?” he thought. “No one knows me now. Should I change my name for something better? Should I try to find more vampires? Should I go after Kort to find revenge? Should I kill myself, just to finish my dead life?” thought Moswen while he tried to take some rest.
All of this on his mind was going to be a headache for him. He needed to figure out things, he needed to take these thoughts out of his mind.
Last edited by jnmrcs on Wed Nov 30, 2005 3:50 am; edited 1 time in total
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jnmrcs Builder
Joined: 30 Apr 2005 Topics: 6 Posts: 1274 Location: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas... Items Legends
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 3:46 am Post subject: |
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As I said, the introcution is up, today...
You have until November 15 to give ideas and please explain it. Thanks and enjoy it.
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Shady Stoat Elder
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 4:04 am Post subject: |
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Good start. The totally open decision point give us readers a lot of power
*tries to stifle an evil laugh*
I think he should try to find some more vampires and, in a slow way, try to build up information on Kort. That way he can figure out whether revenge is a realistic option or not - and maybe make some allies at the same time.
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Chinaren Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005 Topics: 340 Posts: 8881 Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com Items Legends
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LordoftheNight Revered IFian
Joined: 11 Aug 2005 Topics: 41 Posts: 5276 Location: Hell Items Legends
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 6:56 am Post subject: |
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jnmrcs wrote: | As I said, the introcution is up, today...
You have until November 15 to give ideas and please explain it. Thanks and enjoy it. |
you sure you don't mean december - november 15 was two weeks ago _________________ Punishment leads to Fear. Fear leads to Obedience. Obedience leads to Freedom. Therefore, Punishment leads to Freedom.
Ave Dominus Nox
A Fronte Praecipitium a Tergo Lupi
Blood Bowl
Scraping the Barrel
A Tale of Four Swords
Passion
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jnmrcs Builder
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 11:19 am Post subject: |
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lordofthenight wrote: | jnmrcs wrote: | As I said, the introcution is up, today...
You have until November 15 to give ideas and please explain it. Thanks and enjoy it. |
you sure you don't mean december - november 15 was two weeks ago |
mmmm, that's the hour problem... I mean... well...
Sorry about that. You are right December 15.
Shady, about the power to the readers... well that is what I wanted to start the story.
Thanks, for your replay. Enjoy it.
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ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
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Posted: Thu Dec 01, 2005 6:02 am Post subject: |
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He does need to find out more information on his new state of being. He's no longer human, but something else. Isolating himself from other vampires won't help him. There's little to take revenge on at this point, except maybe a defiance of his very existence. For as much as he sympathizes with his prey, I don't think he's ready to hate himself for what he has become. _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
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jnmrcs Builder
Joined: 30 Apr 2005 Topics: 6 Posts: 1274 Location: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas... Items Legends
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Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 1:24 pm Post subject: |
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Does he have to live like a vampire? Try to understand what he is now (something like fauna said)?
Does he choose to live like a human or vampire?
Does he have to live with vampires or humans?
Revenge or not revenge? Or maybe wait until have an opinion about it (as Shady said)?
*trying to find more options*
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Shogun Respected Citizen
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Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 4:35 pm Post subject: |
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Live with humans, you get more blood that way, but there is a bad side. Our hero might fall in love, bringin' up a corny ending. _________________ I'm ripped across the ditch, and settled in the dirt and I'm
Wiggled like a stitch, yet I'm the one who's hurt
Pay attention to your twisted little indiscretions
I've got no right to way, I'm just caught up all the battles
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jnmrcs Builder
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Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 5:39 pm Post subject: |
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Shogun wrote: | Our hero might fall in love, bringin' up a corny ending. |
, no more comments...
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jnmrcs Builder
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Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 6:05 pm Post subject: |
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He should try to find some more vampires and, in a slow way, try to build up information on Kort. That way he can figure out whether revenge is a realistic option or not - and maybe make some allies at the same time.
He does need to find out more information on his new state of being.
Live with humans, you get more blood that way, but there is a bad side.
This were the ideas so far, try to find humans or vampires. I will put the poll this thursday.
****** Sorry for this taking so much time I thought that 15 days were enough but I don't thought it was this much. I will have to re-think a little more about this time.
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ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
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Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 3:29 am Post subject: |
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That is fine. You are just beginning this SG and have to experiment a little to find the best time table for you and the players. _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
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jnmrcs Builder
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Posted: Wed Dec 14, 2005 9:05 am Post subject: |
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The poll will be posted tomorrow. Until now I have just this options; Try to find humans, try to find vampires and try to know his new powers.
You got until today to add something more (if you think it's needed).
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jnmrcs Builder
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Posted: Thu Dec 15, 2005 4:48 am Post subject: |
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Poll is now open. It will be there for ten (10) days. On December 25 the poll will be closed. Then I will start to write the first chapter. I will post it before January 1.
Sorry I made a Mmistake, there must be three options and they are:
What should Moswen do now?
Try to find Humans
Try to find Vampires
Try to know more about his new state (vampire)
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Smee Revered IFian
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Posted: Thu Dec 15, 2005 4:54 am Post subject: |
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I vote for find out more about his new form.
Happy Writing. _________________ The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
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Chinaren Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005 Topics: 340 Posts: 8881 Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com Items Legends
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Shady Stoat Elder
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Posted: Thu Dec 15, 2005 5:13 am Post subject: |
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Me too, once the third option is added
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jnmrcs Builder
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Posted: Thu Dec 15, 2005 9:06 am Post subject: |
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Ok, people... sorry about the poll. Please vote, the poll it's up...
Thanks for the fast response of Shanty
Please vote and sorry again...
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jnmrcs Builder
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Posted: Mon Dec 26, 2005 7:39 am Post subject: |
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I know this is taking so much, so I will reduce some times o do this moving better. Excuse me for taking so much time (this is my first storygame) but I will solve it.
Voting has end. Thanks for your participation, I will write the first chapter soon. I hope I could post it before next year.
Merry Christmas and happy new year !
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jnmrcs Builder
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Posted: Thu Dec 29, 2005 10:01 am Post subject: |
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I have changed the times on the rules. For now on it will be 10 days for the readers to argument on the story and 5 days to vote. I hope this help the story.
Anyway I will post the first chapter today... soon.
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jnmrcs Builder
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Posted: Thu Dec 29, 2005 10:20 am Post subject: Chapter 1: Knowing the creature inside him |
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He couldn’t rest, not even a little. His thoughts were now like a nightmare to him. He continued trying to solve all his confusions. It was very hard, he has a lot of things to solve but he has to take them one by one.
“What to do now? Where to go? Take revenge or don’t? What about my name?” he thought while he was getting up.
Like he couldn’t rest he will take one of his thoughts to try to solve it, maybe this would help him to feel better. “Where I should start? There are a lot of things that I need to solve” he thought.
He didn’t know what he was supposed to do but he has to take a decision. And it didn’t matter if that was what he should do, he has to make a decision and continue with it. That was the only way to do it.
He walked to the entrance of the lair. It was almost night but at least the sun wasn’t bothering him now. He could leave the lair whenever he wanted now but first he has to solve one of his thoughts.
“Why don’t start from the beginning. I don’t like being a vampire but that is what I am now. Why not start to learn what I am and what I can do now. They just told me that I have to be aware of the pointing thing on my heart and to protect my head. I think I could do it. But what are the benefits of a vampire?” he thought.
He stayed at the entrance of the lair, just with his thoughts. “I have until the morning, its better if I start to find what of all the things that they said about the privileges is truth” he said while he was going out of the cave.
He started to make some tests. He tried to hear the animals that were out there, like the owls. Then he tried to find them, just to know how near or far they were. He followed their song and found them.
Then he tested his strength. He pushed some trees, took some big rocks and even tried to throw them. He ran and jumped, he was very exited about the results he was getting. He was faster and have more strength than any regular human, even more than any muscle human…
Then he felt it. His time out of the lair has to end, the clarity was arriving. He returned to the lair happier than when he got out. He still didn’t like to be a vampire but at least it has some advantages. He lay down on the ground and took some rest.
This time he could rest a lot of time. He didn’t know if it was because he was answering some questions or if it was because he used a lot of energy. When he got up it was night again.
“So I’m now a dark creature. Well more like an animal. I’m better than the humans but like an animal. Like the animals I could hear, smell and even I’m more strength full than humans. Could I be an animal being a vampire or could I continue with my humanity?” he thought before go out of the lair. Then he tested himself again, just to be sure that it was a permanent benefit.
The next night he tried to repeat the tests but this time more like training. He was tired even when he rested very well. He got out of the lair and got prepared to his first training. He ran, jumped and played with some rocks.
But then he felt like if he was without any energy. He stopped the training and tried to take some rest where he was. He felt like his head was spinning and his body empty. His mouth was watered a lot and his skin was itching from the inside. He tried to think to know what’s going on but his thoughts weren’t coherent.
Then he smelt it, blood. That sweet and softness smell. The blood was calling him and without thinking he ran to it; like a hunter followed a pray. He ran with the strength that he have left on his body to where was that delicious smell.
He arrived at some flat land. There it was; some fresh dead humans on the ground with their flesh opened. That smell, that color, that food. His mouth was all water and his skin was itching every time more and more. He felt the need of his food.
Then he waked up, his mind waked up of that animal instinct. He was very hungry but they were humans, like he was before. He stared at them, they were dead. Then he realized that he wasn’t the only vampire there.
He hid to see who else were there. He saw three vampires that were lean back on some rocks. They were eating.
“What should I do now? I’m hungry, but what I need is just blood. I could find some animal to obtain the blood. I’m not sure if it will give me the same effect as the human, but at least I could try it. I’m not sure that I wanted to eat more humans, it is like cannibalism. But they are dead, I’m not killing them. What should I do?” Moswen was fighting on his interior…
“They are dead but they still humans. Should I eat human’s blood or animal’s blood? Should I continue with my humanity or forget about it and be an animal? What should I do?” he continued thinking while seeing the fresh food…
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jnmrcs Builder
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Posted: Thu Dec 29, 2005 10:22 am Post subject: |
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Chapter one is up. I will give you until January 10, 2006 (because of the holidays) then I will put the poll. Enjoy.
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LordoftheNight Revered IFian
Joined: 11 Aug 2005 Topics: 41 Posts: 5276 Location: Hell Items Legends
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Posted: Thu Dec 29, 2005 5:01 pm Post subject: |
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Drink from the human. You're no longer human - but that doesn't make you an animal - you are something superior to mankind. Humans are mere cattle.
Its like asking a human to chose between beef steak or barbequed rat. _________________ Punishment leads to Fear. Fear leads to Obedience. Obedience leads to Freedom. Therefore, Punishment leads to Freedom.
Ave Dominus Nox
A Fronte Praecipitium a Tergo Lupi
Blood Bowl
Scraping the Barrel
A Tale of Four Swords
Passion
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Posted: Fri Dec 30, 2005 12:38 am Post subject: |
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Good chapter.
I think this time he will justify it to himself, and drink from the human. I don't think he'd be ready to kill a human... at least yet. But someone already dead, when he's hungry, will be too big a temptation.
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Shady Stoat Elder
Joined: 02 Oct 2005 Topics: 76 Posts: 2950 Location: England Items Legends
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Posted: Fri Dec 30, 2005 12:40 am Post subject: |
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That was me, above.
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ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Topics: 58 Posts: 2567 Location: USA Items Legends
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Posted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 6:14 am Post subject: |
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Everybody eats, and he's no exception. He needs what he needs. But I think that he also searches for alternatives to killing humans. He feels a moral conflict.
For now he will drink from animals, whether the humans were dead already or not. Over time I think he'll come to realize that regardless of where he drinks blood from, something dies. As he identifies less with humanity, then he'll be more likely to take what he needs from them. _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
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jnmrcs Builder
Joined: 30 Apr 2005 Topics: 6 Posts: 1274 Location: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas... Items Legends
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Posted: Thu Jan 05, 2006 9:02 am Post subject: |
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Until now I have these three ideas:
1) Drink from the human. You're no longer human - but that doesn't make you an animal.
2) Drink from the human if he is already death, but don't kill humans... yet.
3) For now drink from animals, whether the humans were dead already or not.
More ideas? On january 10 I will put the poll.
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Shogun Respected Citizen
Joined: 15 Aug 2005 Topics: 0 Posts: 628 Location: In your nightmares, feeding on your fears. Items Legends
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Posted: Thu Jan 05, 2006 6:22 pm Post subject: |
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Drink from humans. Alive or dead, same thing except the dead ones are usually missing bodyparts. It doesn't make you an animal. It's just...life. _________________ I'm ripped across the ditch, and settled in the dirt and I'm
Wiggled like a stitch, yet I'm the one who's hurt
Pay attention to your twisted little indiscretions
I've got no right to way, I'm just caught up all the battles
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jnmrcs Builder
Joined: 30 Apr 2005 Topics: 6 Posts: 1274 Location: Puerto Rico, Soy Boricua pa' q tu lo sepas... Items Legends
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Posted: Tue Jan 10, 2006 6:11 am Post subject: |
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Ok people the poll is up. It will be up for 5 days, so it will be closed on Jan 15. Vote and participate...
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You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum
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