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Lebrenth
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 Posted: Thu Feb 09, 2006 7:39 pm Post subject: Heroes Never Panic, Part Two |
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I think I'm going to put the chapter summaries in this topic too. Which means I need to move the chapter down to the bottom. I will have the summaries up soon.
NOTICE! This is a violent and gory story
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Last edited by Lebrenth on Sat Sep 30, 2006 9:29 am; edited 12 times in total
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Chinaren
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Thu Feb 09, 2006 11:41 pm Post subject: |
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Great chapter (again!). The Warders have got real problems within their ranks 
The decision point, I presume, is whether or not we mention Stanimir's treatment of Traeker.
I'd say stay really cool about it. Don't do anything immediately, wait until the rage has died a little. Then, talk to Haymen about it. He's your leader, you don't want to hold back valuable information from him.
You also need to stress that Stanimir didn't actually kill Traeker. Intentions aside, it's vital that you don't exaggerate or lie because in the end, they only need to catch you out in one mis-truth and they'll never trust you again.
You're the newcomer, you have to play politics. There's a middle ground somewhere, right in between holding back vital info from the guy in charge, and accusing a valued (although they're fools to do so) member of the group of murder.
My  anyway 
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LordoftheNight
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| Posted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 8:08 am Post subject: |
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it seems to me as if S* could have been actually been going for the zombie instead of T*, but with the light gone he just hit the wrong person
T would have died regardless of S's involvment, so i'd say leave it, telling on S's possible involvment will do no good, onl harm
*i'm dsylexic, you can't expect me to remember how to spell names
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 1:53 pm Post subject: |
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The abbreviations are a good idea there, Lordofthenight. I can hardly remember Stanimir's name myself!
I went ahead and put up a poll, by the way.
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jnmrcs
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| Posted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 2:01 pm Post subject: |
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| It's hard to know what really happened. But something is for sure, you have to tell what you saw to the leader...
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AreonK
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| Posted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 4:46 pm Post subject: |
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| I say kill Stanimir. But it seems I am outvoted, oh well. Nice chapter Lebrenth!
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Warmaster Daizo
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| Posted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:56 pm Post subject: |
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| I must agree that as the newcomer, it would not be wise to question a veteran. Besides, in a military unit, the commander needs to know everything that's going on.
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Smee
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| Posted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 1:32 am Post subject: |
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Hey Lebby,
You got the chapter done then, and it's a good one as usual.
I voted for biding* time and then telling Haymen about it. Nothing conclusive, just our concerns that Stanimir was holding a brick and the injuries seem to correspond - being careful to mention that it was too dark to really see and that it could have been accidental.
Happy Writing 
*speak to Chianren for biding lessons if you need them.
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Sun Feb 19, 2006 7:06 pm Post subject: NOT A NEW CHAPTER, just rearranging |
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Chapter Nine of "Heroes Never Panic", PART TWO
Manning nods his assent to you before you turn and give your answer to Haymen.
"Yes, we accept and we'll be ready to join you tonight."
Haymen claps his hand on your shoulder.
"Let me show you your beds then," he says. He takes you upstairs again where Stanimir already lays heavily in a deep sleep. "Would you prefer up top or this level?"
Considering how poorly you got on with Stanimir, you would rather go upstairs for now. He takes you up onto one of the platforms. There are six beds, three of them with occupants. Over the railing, you can see Stanimir and across the gap the other platform has another six beds also, but only one occupant, snoring obnoxiously.
"I presume these will do. You still have a few hours before we leave, so I recommend getting started. Let me know if you have anything you want locked up."
"As a matter of fact I have," you say. You give him the thick unopened letter from 'the General' and a few personal items, but keep your identifying papers. Should they be lost or stolen you'll have difficulty replacing them, but it would be best to have them available in case you need to leave the city in a hurry.
You and Manning inspect your new rifles. They are in perfect working order and seem to be very reliable. You set them down, and you watch Manning's eyes grow heavy and finally close, immediately breathing deeply.... You wait for the same overwhelming fatigue to overtake you, but it doesn't happen.
After an hour, you see no reason to keep trying and you start wandering the Broken Drum. There are a few curious people, but you wander about so casually that they do not feel the need to confront you. The place really was just a simple tavern before the Warders moved in. You avoid closed doors, but an open door invites you into the cellar. Not far in, there is a closed door closing in a potent stench that convinces you to leave it be.
After a while, the Warders begin to awaken. Cornmeal and chicken stew is offered to you, but after it sits in front of you untouched for a few minutes, a fellow named Bradshaw gratefully accepts it from you. You assure yourself that after tonight your appetite and sleep will return to you. You've been in the balance for too long, in jail through the trial, and getting settled in Tiersley. After tonight you'll see where you stand and you'll be able to relax.
You wake Manning up when Haymen begins setting one of the tables up like a battlefield. The two of you watch closely as he points out important areas and speculated movement of the zombie groups. Without hesitation, once you understand the map, you point out the location of the open sewer where you encountered the zombies, and mention that there were many Skulls to confront them.
"Yes, I know," Haymen says and continues to say that seven Skulls were killed in the encounter and the East Gate had to be closed. "The zombies are getting stronger. We need to exercise extra caution tonight. We'll patrol Tamber Road to Southbanks."
"Sir, Southbanks is dry. The hordes are focusing on the East and Northeast. Outliers are taken out by Red Sun," Bradshaw says.
"We're focusing our attention on Tamber Road, not Southbanks. If we get to Southbanks without encounter, we'll turn back and try Camlin Road."
"This is a waste of time, Haymen," Stanimir says. "Send scrappers in and they'll come to us."
"We already discussed this, Stanimir. It's too dangerous to send scrappers, and if we draw them too close to the city we run the risk of letting them in."
"You're a coward, the whole lot of you are cowards. Bradshaw, 'Boots', you go scare them up for us and we'll be ready."
"They don't take orders from you."
"They will if they know what's best for them."
"Bradshaw, you're still on wall duty, and Dagmar stays with the captain and Manning."
"Your wasting time. I could do more on my own."
"Maybe you should go then," someone says. The room is quiet.
"Let me know when you're ready to say that to my face, Traeker," Stanimir says darkly.
"We're taking Tamber Road," Haymen intrudes. "And tonight we'll have these two gentlemen with us. This is Captain John Taggert and Gregory Manning..."
A few more introductions later, everyone loads up. Inside the eyes of your comrades you see resolute determination. If there is fear in them, they don't let it show. Manning stands proud amongst them, shaking hands with the others and psyching each other up. They mull about a little standoffishly towards you... probably your former rank is making them hesitant....
The group assembles a squad of about twenty men, the entire membership of the Warders minus a few to keep watch of the tavern. The wind protests your company as its cold whips lash across the crew. The night is especially dark, without any stars or a moon. Lanterns will decide the extent of your vision tonight.
Through the quiet streets, you proceed to the wall, which seems larger and more indomitable in the dark. Every two hundred paces, large lanterns burn brightly on the wall, but you can only see their outline as they bear their light outside of the city. When you reach the base of the wall, Bradshaw and another Warder climb up while the rest of you wait. On top they look around intently.
"Clear sir," Bradshaw calls down.
"All right, open it up," Haymen says.
One of the men retrieves a crank and places it in an ordinary looking hole. As he turns it, a door in the wall opens very slowly, eventually exposing a passage. One more slow cranking door and you're looking at the well lit perimeter outside the city. The passage opens about ten feet higher than the dry moat, which is gapped by a ladder that is brought out from the city.
You climb out and watch the wall close up again, looking, as it should, like any other part of the wall. The ladder is left on the ground.
"Hold fast, men. Let's go."
Stanimir makes no protests as you follow Haymen's plan, easing your way through the forsaken section of the city to the remnants of a specific road. A charred signpost reads "Tamber Road". Then the group turns south.
The ruins feel haunted, even worse than before. And as the shadows shift with the lanterns passing them, movement is everywhere. Every step is made cautiously, and Stanimir's scowl tells you he is getting very impatient with it. Then he smiles evilly, drawing twin broadswords and walking out of the group towards the east. Everyone's attention turns east. You notice with pride that Manning quickly occupies his attention with the flanks and rear of the group to ensure there won't be surprises. He has a lot of experience fighting in cities, after all. That in mind, you look into the darkness like the others. Stanimir has his head turned, listening.
No one can hear anything, but he nods his head. He walks farther east.
"Stanimir," Haymen protests, but he obviously doesn't listen. Suddenly he roars and claps his swords together, shattering the silence. The zombies enter the light at full sprint, dilapidated and hideous, but as forcefully as starved wolves. Stanimir lets the bullets fly past him first, but after the volley, he charges into them, for they are hardly slowed by the attack. Guns are dropped and swords are drawn with war cries erupting from the warders. Four of you, including Manning, begin reloading deliberately and with brisk precision, and with each load, another gun is retrieved and loaded. With the group in set battle, the blades flying at close quarters, there is no room for firing yet. A scream grabs your attention as the Warder beside you is knocked to the ground with a zombie thrashing his fists madly on top of him.
You draw your broken sword and drive the jagged tip through the zombies neck, following through to push the zombie off of the Warder. Its hands clench powerfully on your wrists and pulls your arms away. You kick its head with all of your strength... its weakened neck is unable to hold. It snaps and the head hangs backwardly.
You retrieve your sword and pull the fallen Warder away from the fighting. You grab a rifle and put a bullet in the next zombie but it keeps coming. Another shot barrels over your head, blasting a large hole in the face of the zombie, which drops it quickly. Then Manning helps you with the Warder, handing you another loaded rifle, and you both stand to face more.
The zombies relent and retreat into the darkness, but Stanimir and several Warders do not let them go. You quickly follow them, feeling the thrill of battle coursing through you, but in the darkness, you quickly lose the group. You follow sounds, stepping carefully through the ruins till you see a light. As you approach, you see the Warder holding it... the one Stanimir called Traeker.
Before you reach the light of his lantern, a figure comes from behind. It's Stanimir with a brick or stone in his hand. You freeze in your tracks. The rifle feels light in your hands as you aim quickly at Stanimir.
Traeker hears Stanimir, but as he turns, a zombie leaps onto Traeker, extinguishing the lantern. You hear a yell, but it quickly dies. The terrible bellowing scream of a zombie springs from the darkness beside you and you shoot blindly at it, drawing your sword and frantically hacking at it as it pommels you fiercely. When it stops moving, you move as quickly as you can back to the others.
Haymen loudly calls for everyone to regroup. Soon the casualties are assessed... and all are accounted for except Traeker.
"He was taken," Stanimir says. You have finished reloading your rifle and you look at him. He's without fear or concern. He cleans the blood from his swords and discards the cloth. Then he draws a knife and begins scalping the fallen zombies.
The scalpers retrieve Traeker's body with the back of his skull caved in, as if by a rock or brick.... You look at Haymen, who has noticed your silent rage and the way you grip the rifle tightly in your hands. He watches your gaze turn burningly onto Stanimir. Haymen draws his sword in confusion, his looks trading between you and Stanimir, who, as yet, is unaware of your inner trial....
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Last edited by Lebrenth on Fri Mar 03, 2006 11:21 am; edited 1 time in total
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 2:13 pm Post subject: |
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Yep, I'm just rearranging a bit. I'm planning on writing another chapter soon, but haven't gotten to it yet.
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| Posted: Tue Feb 21, 2006 8:33 pm Post subject: Heroes Never Panic, Chapter 10 |
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Chapter Ten of "Heroes Never Panic"
You meet eyes with Haymen and shake your head. He doesn't know what you mean by it, but he can tell you're relaxing and he sheathes his sword. He soon finds a moment to speak with you.
"I saw Stanimir with Traeker," you say.
"And?"
"He had a stone in his hand... he was sneaking up behind Traeker."
"He killed Traeker? You saw this?"
"... The light went out. I didn't see it. But the wounds-"
"Don't matter," he interupts hastily. "If you saw him kill Traeker, there would be no choice, but you didn't."
"I know... it isn't enough. It could have been accidental even. I understand... but it was my duty to tell you."
"And I thank you for that. Captain, you should consider keeping your head low for a while. The men don't know you. Give them a chance to get used to you before you make any accusations!"
"I understand. I don't want to cause any trouble."
"Good.... I think we'll be heading back. This was a fortunate--"
But as he speaks, another gun shot cuts him off. You look into the group as several zombies pull themselves up from the ground, their scalps removed and exposing their skulls. More shots knock them down again, and a fierce retaliation with axes makes sure they won't try again.
"They're reanimating," Haymen says with dulled urgency. Then you see a warder throw a brutal punch at another, knocking him back in confusion. The others quickly come between them, but they're unable to hold him back! He's throwing them around like dolls! You and Haymen rush to help. Then Manning yells:
"He's turned!"
And with that, streams of blood follow the bullets passing through him and he collapses. Without hesitation he is beheaded. His head is quickly scooped up and put in a bag.
"Make ready!" Haymen yells out. The group quickly complies, ramrods sliding and thumping, hammers cocking back.
"They're coming, Haymen," Stanimir says grimly, but he doesn't charge in. He sets his feet like a statue and waits for them.
Something stirs in the darkness and hastens to meet you. The rush sounds like a sudden and fierce windstorm thrashing through calm and still air. It catches you much faster than you could image, like bullets speeding past you, all around you, but more like thousands of bats moving impossibly fast, lashing you in passing, obscuring all vision and sound in a chaotic frenzy. And though it passes quickly, you feel inverted and confused. The gunshots begin, but you can't see what they're firing at!
"Hold your fire!" Haymen shouts. A warder howls as a bullet enters his side, and the shots continue. "Stop firing! Stop firing!"
"Sir, it went off on its own!"
"Mine too sir! It's still cocked!"
You try to draw your sword, but your arm has lost its strength, feeling heavy and sluggish, unable to grip. Finally the shots stop.
"Get us out of here Haymen!" Stanimir says loudly.
"Quiet! Everyone listen! We're going to pull back! Everyone is going to stay calm and we are NOT going to turn our backs on this!"
"Get that man off the ground!" you yell and several men look back, but Haymen shakes his head as the mistakenly shot man continues wailing on the ground. You move forward, though your muscles do not want to obey. You clench and unclench your hand, trying to force blood into it. "Manning!" you yell, but it was unnecessary. The two of you stride in front of the retreating group. Only Stanimir, who keeps himself between the group and whatever he sees in the darkness, is with you as you and Manning pick up the wounded man.
"Leave him, Captain," he says with heavy sarcasm. "He's dead even if he gets back to the city."
But that is yet to be seen. You catch up to the group quickly, for they move at a walk, and you do not enjoy being in front of the last of the rifles that haven't, yet, gone off on their own. Then Stanimir lowers his swords and runs toward the group. Though he doesn't seem to have any fear in him, it is extremely unnerving and but not a single man joins him as he pushes through, sprinting as fast as he can go. He calls out as he passes.
"Run! Run you bastards!"
And all of their fortitude vanishes. Everyone runs, and all of the scalps that were collected in bags fall open as they're dropped on the ground. You still can not see what you are running from, and you continue to carry the warder with Manning until they take the last of the light away with them, leaving you blind to whatever may be chasing you.
"Let go," you say, almost more to yourself than to Manning. It is hard to let the man's arms slip from your hands, but he has already fainted from lack of blood. The two of you run, the furious sound of pursuit soon following. You tell yourself if you can get to the light that shines around the wall, that you'll make it, and run faster.
Manning begins to trail behind, but you are getting closer. You think you can make it in time, if you don't trip on something in the dark. The others run with their lanterns well ahead of you, and show no signs of turning back and thinking about who they left behind. Your pursuers become frustrated and run faster! It's impossible to guess how far they are behind. You only hope that Manning can stay ahead.
The others turn suddenly, and start huddling outside one of the abandon homes. You're catching up as they file in through the door. As the last man enters, you yell!
"We're coming! Don't block the door!" Guns aim at you as you approach, but the door remains open. You enter quickly, but before Manning catches up to you, they start firing. "Manning is out there!" you yell, but they do not stop until their loads are spent. You look through the open door, the men with swords crowding it, waiting to slam it shut. Manning is coming, but he doesn't have a big lead.
The door slams instantly after he enters and half a dozen men press against it as the wave of zombies crashes into it. The windows shatter and Warders rush to fight them back.
"Barricade that door!" Haymen yells. Furniture is thrown and heaved in front of it as those at the windows continue to engorge the zombies attempting to enter. Their bodies crowd the holes, but finally the six men can withdraw without the door breaking in immediately. But it is still clear that it will not hold. "Upstairs! Everyone!" Haymen commands and soon the stairs crowd with Warders.
With only one direction to defend, there is time to reload, and as the Warders tire, they are switched out. The zombies do not relent immediately, but eventually they seemed to realize that they are not getting through and they retreat.
These zombies are very stubborn, taking bullets to the head with a smile, and sustaining all but the fiercest mutilation before their bodies go limp. Even then, they seem only a breath away from rising again, so certain unlucky souls must go down and make sure they do not by completely decapitating the fallen zombies and tossing their heads away from the bodies. They do not attempt to collect them. Right now, there isn't a soul who wouldn't trade every possession and pinnel to their name to be back in the city.
When the swarm does subside, the exhausted debate begins.
"We need to get back in the city," says one, trying to sound more determined than frightened.
"They're waiting, and they're going to bring their chums," 'Boots' says level-headedly.
"All the more reason to go now!"
"We're too tired," Haymen says imperatively. "And we can't risk bringing them through the passage."
"We can handle them, sir."
"Can we? Can anyone explain what happened? Can you tell Jonathon we can handle them? I'm taking no risks. We're staying here."
"Sir, shouldn't we at least try?"
"... If it calms down enough, we'll leave."
"The longer we wait--," 'Boots' says with growing impatience, but Haymen cuts him off.
"NO! What is this? Do you think this a question? This is my command, and by God, I won't let anyone's cowardice compromise our safety and the safety of the people in that city! Are you all so eager to go back now Stanimir isn't here? What happened to my brave fighting men? When did they become this quivering pile of overgrown children?"
"They aren't cowards," you say calmly. Haymen turns on you.
"Keep your mouth shut, Taggert. They are cowards, all of you. Your brave hero Stanimir runs away, and you don't have enough nerve to stand up to a cup of water. And where is he? What has he done?"
"Sir, we don't care about Stanimir..."
"That's what you say now! Now hear me, anyone who tries to leave without my orders will be treated like any deserter and shot on the spot. This discussion is over."
And no one talks, till the tension slowly eases. But it can only cool down so much before the anxiety of being surrounded by the undead heats it up again. Haymen looks much more in control, and that's what's most important now. Eventually he sends two Warders out onto the roof to see what they can. They seem glad to go, and clamber out of the windows and climb onto the roof. Soon after, the house rumbles, and the moans return. The guns blaze again and the swarm starts all over. While ammunition lasts, it works out fine. They have become very efficient at loading and passing rifles to keep a constant assault on the zombies as they try to climb the stairs.
Everyone is eager to hear what they saw.
"The light didn't let us see much, but it looks like they're gathering. They're on all sides of the building now."
"But," the other one cuts in, "it looks like we can get to the next house over if we can get a few planks of wood up there. We might even be able to bridge all the way back to the passage."
"They'll follow us the whole way," Haymen says. "We still won't be able to get in the passage without them being there with us."
"And we know what condition some of those buildings are in," another Warder adds. "I don't think we can make it all the way, and just one slip and at least one of us dies."
"In any case, we'll wait for day. We have no choice."
But the day comes slowly. However, the fatigue has been minimized and small naps have been possible. When the sun creeps reluctantly from its bed, it looks with baggy eyes at a dull gray blanket of clouds. The light is much greater than night, of course, but nonetheless, the warming light that lifts one's spirits is what everyone hoped for.
Haymen sleeps through the first rays of morning, but many of the others gratefully watch every second of it. Many were waiting to hear the morning patrol on the wall. It is their purpose to shoot any undead being within range every morning. The problem is the house is still too far in to be in range. Clearly, however, the zombies have gone nowhere. They still crowd every window and wait for any excuse to try another swarm.
Talk goes around, weighing the options without the 'Admiral's' heavy opinions.
The secret passage may not be a possibility anymore. During the day, the patrols can watch the walls far more easily, and technically, the Warders shouldn't be using their secret passage. In any case, Bradshaw won't be able to wait during the day without being spotted like he could during the night.
Naturally, you can't go north to Father's Gate or East Gate, because it's Skull territory, and outside of the city, they will kill rival slayers.
The south, at the Sullen River Gate, the Red Sun and Executioner clans do their slaying during the day, and it's hard to say how they will take the intrusion of the Warders. They are protective of what little territory they have and they might not like having such a large assembly of zombies entering it all at once.
And it's always a gamble trying to request help from the city guards on the wall. They won't take chances on slayers when the city is in even minor danger. If they do help, it would be with ropes, which would be plenty, if you had time. But once you're on the perimeter, there's no turning back. If the guards decide not to help, its time to find a friend to agree to behead you when the ammunition runs out.
If Stanimir was still with you, you'd have a grappling hook and rope, but he naturally took that with him. Whatever Haymen said last night about Stanimir being their hero, it certainly was not true.
It seems to you that what they want is someone to stand up and decide on a course of action so that everyone can solidly agree with him when Haymen wakes up and lays down his law. And somehow, your actions last night have them thinking it should be you....
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Last edited by Lebrenth on Fri Mar 03, 2006 11:55 am; edited 3 times in total
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Tue Feb 21, 2006 9:50 pm Post subject: |
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Ooh. It's looking grim!
I would say try to take charge, but he is still new.
I will think on it. 
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Tue Feb 21, 2006 11:44 pm Post subject: |
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A great chapter again, Lebs! 
You do seem to have the opportunity to get your opinions in before Heyman now, so I say take it. None of the others seem too certain of themselves, especially now that Stanimir has left them to it.
Suggest trying the guards, see if they'll throw down ropes. It seems like the least dangerous option to me. It's a fair bet that they'll help as long as it doesn't trouble them or the city too much. As long as the group can outrun the undead and persuade those within the city walls to help them in time, that is...
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jnmrcs
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| Posted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 3:57 am Post subject: |
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| I think like Shady. Try with the guards, at least that it's the least dangerous. But only if you can convience the guards.
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Smee
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| Posted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 4:32 am Post subject: |
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Great chapter
Heading to the walls and appealing to the city guards definately seems the best plan.
However - as has been pointed out, we don't have the time to get the guards attention whilst running away. Therefore I think first one of the warders needs to sneak out across the roofs and arrange with the soldiers for the ropes to be lowered at a signal.
With an arrangement in place then making a run for the walls holds a much better hope of working.
Ideally we want as many ropes lowered at once as possible - to get the men up faster. By alerting them early we have the added benefit of giving the soldiers warning allowing perhaps a half dozen ropes or more.
Happy Writing
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LordoftheNight
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| Posted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 5:07 pm Post subject: |
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i would say stop and reload from just before you joined up with the warders and join the skulls instead
you did remember to save the game before making any important descions right?
you didn't? damn
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Falconus
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| Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2006 2:05 am Post subject: |
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| charge in on the skulls turf and shoot their way through the entrance
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mr_moochie
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| Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 11:33 pm Post subject: |
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| Get to the wall!!! If all of you go, it's likely they'll help, whereas if you send a lone warder, he might decide to bugger off into the city, leaving you out there.
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ethereal_fauna
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| Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 5:49 am Post subject: |
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The guards lowering ropes does appear to be the best option, and sending someone ahead to alert the guards will improve your chances for success.
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Warmaster Daizo
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| Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 9:33 pm Post subject: |
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Don't split up! everything we know about horror stories tells us this is a bad idea, plus it would be bad practice for them to send one person. At the very least they would send three or four, which, of course, leaves the door open for something like, "Johnson didn't make it," when they are reunited.
Generally speaking, infringing on someone else's territory would be a bad idea, especially considering the socio-political environment, but if we assume the crowd of zombies will follow them, a little extra firepower might not be a bad idea....
I say move the whole group towards the wall. The guards can provide covering fire and possibly lower a rope, or at the very least drop a few boxes of food and ammo. Whether the guards help or not, the Warders will be closer to their access point.
Mainly, I'm wondering where Stanimir went. I was under the impression that the whole group followed him into the building they now occupy, but it seems that is incorrect.
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Smee
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| Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 11:06 pm Post subject: |
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But the guards don't know that a large group are approaching the walls with a load of zombies behind them.
Ropes may not be available, and thy won't be ready for a large skirmish.
Sending 1 or more people to prepare the guards could mean they could get reinforcements, and more ropes to get everyone up quicker.
Maybe just send the 1 person a few minutes ahead of the main group?
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| Posted: Fri Mar 03, 2006 10:36 am Post subject: |
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If you send all of them then they could die, all. We are not sure that the guards will help, so what's the meaning on of die closer to their access point?
One could alert the guards, jus in case they wanted to help. But if they woun't help then that one could return to alert the Warders.
Even more maybe the others could slow a little the zombies.
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Fri Mar 03, 2006 11:12 am Post subject: |
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| Warmaster Daizo wrote: | | Don't split up! everything we know about horror stories tells us this is a bad idea |
A good point, but I really dislike cliches, so that logic might not work so well in this story.
| Warmaster Daizo wrote: | | Mainly, I'm wondering where Stanimir went. I was under the impression that the whole group followed him into the building they now occupy, but it seems that is incorrect. |
That's an oversight. I should have made it much clearer that Stanimir wasn't with the group. The last time he was seen, he was ahead of the Warders in the retreat, and when Haymen directed everyone into the building, Stanimir ignored his order and went on by himself. Thanks for bringing that to my attention Warmaster Daizo
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 11:39 am Post subject: Heroes Never Panic, Chapter 11 |
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Chapter Eleven of "Heroes Never Panic"
"We need to send someone out... someone we can trust," you say as you look out the cracked window onto the throng of macabre corpses staring at you with black swelling eyes. Looking at them makes you uneasy in every way, in your stomach and your eyes, in your mind and in the heart. Not only their hideous appearance, but the very fact they exist and that each of them were once people you could shake hands with. You turn away and see that your words carried more gravity than you expected. They do not show weariness or uncertainty as they stand. "You," you say, talking to the nearest warder, "who do you trust who can run fast?"
"Seager can run like a deer... and I'd trust him with my life," the lithe warder says. Everyone chuckles.
"... Tom Seager? Isn't that your name?" you ask with a little confusion. You're usually very good with names.
"Yes sir," the lithe warder says with a smile. You can't help joining him.
"Who else do you trust, Tom Seager?"
"He's good, sir, I've seen him run," another warder says. "And he could have left us all behind if he wanted to... he wouldn't have had any trouble keeping up with Stanimir."
"Stanimir would have a hard time keeping up with me! If he didn't stab me or throw something," Seager says.
And there is a general consent. Everyone seems very pleased with Seager's offer.
"All right, let's talk to Haymen. We need to send someone to talk to the guards on the wall immediately."
Haymen sits in the corner of a dilapidated bedroom, letting others use the dusty bed. You take a knee and gently shake his shoulder. He wakes up startled and looking around. His eyes are baggy and bloodshot. He soon recovers himself and stands, putting a finger to his lips to quiet you before you speak, letting the others sleep while he steps out of the room with you.
"What's happening?" he asks quietly.
"We're discussing sir. We think we should send someone to the wall to talk with the patrols and try to get something arranged so we can bring the whole crew over the wall."
"Discussing? And do you have a volunteer yet?"
"Seager, sir."
"Seager?" he says in protest, but it mulls over his mind, "... Yes, he'd do fine. All right, we need to get these men out of here. But be careful Taggert. I don't want you thinking to overturn my command."
"I have no ambition to, sir, none at all. We just want out of here alive."
"Fine fine. But I hope you realize this could get us into a lot of trouble."
"What do you mean?"
"Depending on who is in command, they might arrest us for endangerment."
"Of who?" you ask with frustration.
"The soldiers who will be occupied with us, and the city, and even ourselves. I want you to tell Seager to be very careful how he arranges the crossover."
"You want me to tell him, sir?"
"Enough of that 'sir' nonsense from you. The men already trust you, I can tell. It was that little rescue attempt. He's dead now, but they know you tried. They respect that and the last thing I need to do is alienate you. I know you were a very capable officer, so take care of this for me. And if you don't mind, don't wake me again unless it's serious or you have another desperate plan."
"Very well... I'll take care of it."
"Good."
You go back and talk to Seager, expressing the need to find a reasonable officer, if possible, and show utmost respect. You tell him to have one of the city wall lanterns re-lit as soon as he gets through to make sure you know he's made it. And you tell him to get the warders inside the city to help if he can. He seems eager and proud of his task and responds with a formal,
"Yes sir."
"Good luck, man. I know you can do it, you just show me how well. And if you happen to bring a little ammo and food back with you, we'll be especially grateful."
"Yes sir," he says again and he's out the window, climbing onto the roof, two others handing up an old skinny plank and his rifle.
"Get ready for a swarm!" you call out, and everyone wakes up a little more. You point to another warder, "Randal? I want you ready to make a distraction for our man Seager."
"No problem, Salvin has a grenade," Randal says.
"Excellent, get it now. I just want to make sure Seager isn't followed. Give them something else to think about."
"Yes sir," he says quickly and starts his search, calling out for Salvin. The zombies are stirring again, you watch as the grey figures become agitated, and soon everything is moving again. The aged Salvin comes with his grenade, apparently unwilling to let someone else use it.
"Well, light it!" you say. His smile reveals his missing teeth with his delight, and he watches the gleam of the lit match for a moment before setting it to the wick, which burns down very slowly, then suddenly very quickly, as he throws it into the old road.
It's hard to say what damage was done, since as soon as we look again, the hole is filled with the undead already and they're back inside the house with renewed fury! You see Seager running across the sagging and swaying board and hold your breath. He crosses like a cat, hardly showing any effort, and he takes the plank over with him.
"He's good," you say to yourself.
"Always had good balance, that boy," Salvin says "Haymen was always yellin' at him for his showin' off on the Perseverance..."
The shots mute his words, and the clamor becomes too distracting to do anything else but help reload. Then a tremor rocks the foundation of the building, and everyone holds their breath as they feel the house shift. The wood creaks and cracks in unseen corners, and continues to groan lowly as the shift stops. The sentinels suddenly remember their task again and continue firing after letting them getting much closer than before.
"Salvin, do you have anymore?" you ask.
"That was my lucky one, saved it for a black day. I ain't got anymore."
And it's probably just as well with the groaning house's condition. Warders with swords move over the stairs and beginning slashing at the assaulting zombies. They're who are outrunning the reloaders as they climb over the bodies, but they're clogging the way till at last the gap, the whole stairway, is strangled with bodies till only with great struggle and digging, the zombies can get in.
"What's our ammo?" Haymen asks, obviously awaken, like all others, by the shots. The collective pool of powder and bullets dwindles to a handful of shots left, and being used up just by the reloads. Already, large chunks of cloth have been ripped from shirts to accommodate the wadding needs. The bullets are first to deplete, leaving four rifles unloaded and nothing to do about it but dig into the corpses to retrieve more. Swords stab repeatedly in the bodies as they go, bloodying themselves till they're hard to distinguish from zombies themselves. We load all of our firearms, leaving only specks of blackpowder littering the ground that if swept into a pile would barely fill a half load.
"No shots unless absolutely necessary. You've got one bullet each, take care of it like a baby till you absolutely have to throw it to the dogs," Haymen says with angry seriousness. "Now let's see if we can't make it harder on them. Throw down some furniture on that stairway. Taggert, I want you to keep an eye out for Seager."
Manning keeps watch with you as you look across the buildings. You can't see him, nor do you see him soon. The house calms again, as the undead reappraise and try to find a way into you. They circle and scrape at the walls. Some of them try climbing, but walls are too smooth or too weak to allow them to climb. Slowly, pieces tear away and the house groans more.
"They're trying to climb, Admiral," Randal says as he looks down with you.
"Let them come in," Haymen says. "We're ready!"
But they're still having too much difficulty to get up.
"Won't take long till go down to them," Randall says to you... the house is on a noticeable slant now. But it's standing.
Time passes, but the wall lanterns stay dark and dead on the wall.
"Sir?" Randal says tentatively. You give him your attention. "Taggert right? We were wondering if you were related to General Taggert."
You take a deep breath. The General is a loved and hated man. This problem follows you everywhere it seems, even a collapsing house surrounded by the undead.
"My father."
"I see, sir," and he walks away from you carefully. He's soon passing it along, you notice. You even see someone shake his head and begrudgingly hand over something from his pack that looks like jerky.
"We did that too," Manning says, "when you were first assigned to our company."
"I know. Collins cheated by the way. He asked before he made his bet. I remember I asked him to keep it quiet about it, but that didn't last."
"I never liked Collins..." Manning says carefully.
"He was good in a fight. Kept cool, always obeyed orders," you respond.
"He was an ass, sir. It wasn't your fault. You did what you were ordered to."
"It's all right, Manning. That was a long time ago, and I've done worse things since then."
A plank slaps the roof, and Seager runs over it again. Excitement boils in the room. You look back at the wall, but the lanterns are still unlit. They help him into the room.
"What did you find Tom?" Haymen asks. Tom looks scraped and his face is red and starting swell on the left side.
"Stanimir," he says. Their is a hush. "he was outside the wall, he said he'll light a lantern when they're ready. He said he'd already told the others about us, and they'd be ready soon."
The group is relieved, if a little apprehensive at the source of help.
"All right," Haymen says. "Let's get out of here. Are we ready with the plank?" A wider and sturdier plank has apparently been made. "Standard marching order everyone, we're getting out as soon as possible."
"The signal hasn't been lit yet," you say.
"By the time we get out of here, it will be."
And to make his point stronger, another loud crack issues.
The room holds still for a moment, waiting to see your next move, and the Admiral waits to hear whether or not you challenge his decision....
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Smee
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| Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 12:09 pm Post subject: |
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I agree - get out NOW.
Excellent chapter
Let's hope Stanimir hasn't tricked us - although it probably wouldn't be to his profit.
Happy Writing
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 12:21 pm Post subject: |
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I think Haymen's making a mistake - but we'll have to leave soon anyway. I don't think the extra few minutes will make a difference, one way or another. Either Stanimiar is going to help us or he isn't. It's out of our hands now.
Excellent chapter, Lebs. Keep it coming... and keep it mean *grin*
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jnmrcs
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| Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 3:27 pm Post subject: |
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| You must go out now... Even if that isn't good desicion you can't wait longer...
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Smee
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| Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 10:28 pm Post subject: |
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Voted for leave now - Although I'd suggest that once we're all on the next house that we do what we can to knock the house down.
Not only would this mask the sound of our escape, but also throw a lot of dust and confusion around, hopefully delaying the zombies still trying to get in.
Who knows - a wall on the head may stop a few too.
Happy Writing
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mr_moochie
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| Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 12:36 am Post subject: |
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| Leave now, but don't go all the way to the wall. find a sturdy house, and wait there for a bit. Also, I agree with Smee, knock that bastard down!
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| Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 11:38 am Post subject: |
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| I agree with smee and mr_moochie... also voted.
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 5:28 pm Post subject: |
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I thought I had commented on this, but obviously not!
Anyway, nice chapter! Things are getting a little sticky for our boys!
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 10:27 am Post subject: |
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Chapter Twelve of "Heroes Never Panic"
This is certainly no time to challenge anything. You just hope Stanimir hurries.
The warders navigate the large heavy plank into a room, and break through a window, pushing it over the infested street and breaking into the next building's window.
"Do you think we can find a way to make this thing collapse as soon as we're out of it?" you ask Haymen. The zombies, as though sensing the escape attempt, have renewed their fury and the house shifts.
"I don't think it will need our help, Taggert! Move it! Get out!"
The warders know their places and do not fight to get into line as they quickly cross, until a warder (Stewart, you believe his name is), freezes on the verge.
"Move, Stewart, that's an order!" Haymen yells angrily, but you see he's actually very worried. Stewart stares down and can't move. "Stewart, look at me!" But he won't move! "Stewart! Taggert, pull him back."
You grab his elbow and firmly pull him, he closes his eyes and essentially falls backward onto you, unable to step. The others cross, leaving you, Manning, Haymen and Stewart the last ones in the leaning house.
"Leave me!" Stewart says. "I can't do it!"
"Go ahead," you say to the others, and they're tempted, no doubt about it, but they aren't leaving. "Stewart, what's wrong?"
"He's afraid of heights," Haymen says sadly.
"I can't go across that thing," Stewart says.
"You have to, Stewart, we'll help you. You have to stand up."
"I can't!"
"Just stand up! Manning!" And Manning helps you lift him onto his feet. "Now Manning is going to walk in front of you, and you're going to keep your hands on his sides and stare at his back, all right? We've got plenty of time, so just take it one step at a time, all right? Stewart?"
"... All right."
"Good, now I'll be right behind you," you say.
"I'll take him, he knows me," Haymen says. "Try to keep the plank steady."
"Fine. Just one step at a time, Stewart, we'll help you."
Manning stands ahead of Stewart and takes a deep breath.
"Are you all right Manning?" you ask carefully.
"I'm fine, sir. Don't take too long following us sir."
"Don't worry so much, this house is sturdier than you think," you say with false calmness. You can feel every blow shaking through the house. Stewart stays close and Haymen is close behind him, whispering more assurances as they begin their small steps onto the plank. You can hardly watch! They're going so slow! Stewart nearly buries his face into Manning's back with the groans and bellows of the zombies below them. They jump awkwardly, trying to reach the plank, but they're too low.
You hear a clamor behind you and see a zombie fight his way through the furniture and look at you. You run to the door and slam it, but everything you could use to block it is already on the stairs! The zombie starts beating at the door, and you see Stewart try to turn his head before Haymen's hand stops him.
"Are you all right, Taggert?" Haymen yells back.
"I'm fine, thank you. Keep going."
The zombie is determined. The latch breaks and it's your strength against his, and it's clear who's going to win.
"Save yourself, Manning," you hear Haymen say. You can't hear Manning's response, but you have no time to figure it out. You draw your broken sword as the door throws open. The zombie rushes you. You step back, slashing as you retreat, hacking into the dilapidated meat of his reaching arms, then slashing his knee while he continues to try to get close to you. You move around him as he struggles with his wounds. You make a powerful chop into the back of his neck, severing the spine, and he is done.
You close the door again, and soon hear more movement by the stairs. You look back through the window, as they yank Stewart across the last few feet of the plank. The house lurches! You jump onto the plank as it falls over with the house, warders reach out for you while others hold onto the plank, trying to stop it from being pulled out. You clamber a few feet before they have you, dragging you inside. Shots blast loudly from the nearby window, knocking the zombies off of the plank. You help them pull the plank, the zombies impulsively grab onto and pull back. Everyone without a loaded rifle grabs and pulls, and the others use their shots to push this tug of war in your favor.
Fortunately, you succeed. Unfortunately, you've used almost all of your shots. Yours might be the last loaded rifle left.
"Is everyone all right?" Haymen calls. No one says otherwise. "Next building! Move!"
You find Stewart, they're tying him up.
"What's going on?" you ask.
"It's all right, sir," Stewart says. "This will work."
"We'll carry him across the next one," Randal says with a broad smile. Seager, standing next to you, smiles and gives you a reassuring pat on the shoulder before finding his place in line again. If he's ok with it, you leave him to it, as they discuss whether or not they should gag and blindfold him too.
The next transfer goes much smoother. The collapsing house must have smashed a good number, but not enough. Nonetheless, the zombies are having a hard time understanding the movement. The ones that make it upstairs are quickly slain with swords and axes, and then left confused when you change buildings, jumping out of windows, trying to pursue.
It takes hours to get close to the wall. The warders work themselves up for the charge onto the ground, making a rush for the wall. You've been watching, and you still haven't seen a lit lantern, but now that you're closer, you can see a large group gathered on it, soldiers and others.... Is that Bradshaw?
"They probably forgot to light it," Haymen says looking through the same window. We can't wait for the zombies to surround us. We have to go."
"I understand," you say. The zombies won't stay confused and the men are tired. Plus, this building isn't much better than your first. The plank drops onto the ground, and the warders rush out. There are relatively few zombies and the men handle themselves well. One warder even scalps the zombie he slew and stuffs the scalp in his belt without feeling rushed to help the others.
But the large group approaches, and your easy kills won't last much longer. The group runs to the base of the wall below the group.
"Admiral!" you hear Bradshaw call.
"That's right Bradshaw!" Haymen calls. "Throw us some ropes!"
"You're early! They won't let us throw down the ropes!"
"We really don't care, Bradshaw! Throw what you've got!"
Bradshaw and the other warders drop three ropes.
"Marching order, Two at a time! Keep that rope taut!"
And this is where being assigned to the rear of the group is a bad thing. You prepare your last shot as the wave approaches.
The soldiers above fire in volleys at large group of undead as it approaches. Then another volley, and they're still coming.
On the third volley, the zombies stop.... The soldiers get another volley as they retreat without urgency.
They let out cheers all around you, and the last warders (Stewart still tied up), are brought over the wall. The soldiers laugh with you as they see your relief. Hands are shaken, and warders lift each other off their feet with hugs. You find Bradshaw.
"What did you mean early? What were we supposed to wait for?" you say to him
Bradshaw laughs and says, "Sorry, but the soldiers were ordered not to help until another officer arrived. Stanimir went to get one and he just barely got here."
You look down the stairs and see another large group of soldiers, lined up on both sides of the stairs and even a mounted officer. You don't see Stanimir anywhere.
The warders descend together between the soldiers as if you were getting a heroes welcome for being bailed out of trouble. The mounted officer... as you approach... you recognize him.
"Hold," the officer says brusquely. You know his voice. You went to the academy with this man. ... Kevin Tamanee... looks like he only made it lieutenant after all these years. But you shouldn't be too surprised, he was a very unagreeable fellow who never got along with anyone. Then he says, "Captain, how nice to meet you again." But he isn't talking to you.
Haymen stares back at him grimly.
"In the name of his highness, Rescaprio II, and by the authority of the City Defense of Tiersley under General Realta, I place this group of slayers under arrest for Endangerment."
"Let's get this over with, lieutenant," Haymen says with heavy emphasis on the title.
"Arrest that man," Lieutenant Tamanee says harshly. "James Haymen, you will be held responsible as leader of The Warders. The rest of you will not be charged if you cooperate. Your names will be taken and kept on record for future considerations should you come under suspicion, but otherwise you will carry no burden. Haymen will be tried at the courts earliest convenience and under martial law, he will be incarcerated until a date is set.... Form a line immediately and we'll take care of this quickly."
There is no choice but to let them take Haymen. Before he leaves, he looks at you.
"Follow the captain," he says loudly. Then he's gone. The warders walk by a corporal who writes the names they give.... And you haven't recognized a single one yet! You whisper to Manning:
"Your name is Kevin Marlow, remember?"
And you are Albert Winthrop, you say to the corporal. In passing, you can't help addressing Tamanee.
"They sent a mere lieutenant to lead these men?"
"Hold your tongue! ... You..." he says looking at you, you do not shy away. "I know you."
"And I know you. You haven't changed."
"Would you like to join your beloved 'Admiral'? Move on before I find a cell for you too."
You return to the Broken Drum, the men looking very downtrodden. You have been putting together what you'll say to them once you're all safe inside... but perhaps it can wait till after they've eaten and rested. Coming back with missing men, including their leader, and save for a single scalp, empty handed and with most of your ammunition spent... you can't celebrate mere survival.
"Sir?" Bradshaw says, approaching you. "I just figured out what took Stanimir so long. He was looking for Tamanee. He must have known about him."
"What happened?"
"Tamanee was a captain with the marines aboard the Perseverance. Haymen got him demoted for being reckless with his men's lives."
"Where is Stanimir?"
"I saw him coming in, but he must have slipped off."
Then you enter the tavern. It is well lit and warm aromas welcome everyone. Stanimir is standing beside a keg of ale he must have just put there.
"You knew it was going to happen," Stanimir says to them. "Haymen has been leading us the wrong way every time. We wandered off in the darkness like blind rats when we should have sent scrappers. You stood your ground like scarecrows when you should have followed me back to the city! If you followed me, you wouldn't be the slayers who got pulled in like fish. The Warders are going to be the laughing stock of Tiersley and maybe everywhere. Come in, and I'll show you how to slay! I'll show you the way real slayers fight, and they won't be laughing anymore! It's time to do things right!"
Everyone is desperately hungry and ready to agree with anything anyone says if it will get them a meal, but they remember what Haymen said, and they're hunger isn't enough to ignore it. He said 'Follow the captain,' and everyone knows who that is.
So what next, captain?
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Last edited by Lebrenth on Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:16 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Blaze_
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| Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 1:25 pm Post subject: |
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| I agree with lordofthenight...
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2006 12:32 am Post subject: |
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I don't think we should cave so easily. Stanimir has obviously set himself up to be the next leader of the Warders. What does that mean for you?
Well, you could take the leadership off him right now and, even if you won, you would have to watch your back ALL the time because you know he'll be out to get you.
Or, you can accept his leadership and step down voluntarily. The men won't be happy, but they'll probably accept it. But then what happens to you? Stanimir knows that you'll be there as a replacement, the moment the men become disenchanted with him. You're a natural leader, he can see that. He'll find a way to dispose of you. A rock in the back of the head, on a dark and foggy night, perhaps?
Or, you can challenge him here and now and, if you win, throw him out of the Warders. Maybe kill him, although I doubt it'll be that easy. If he survives, though, he'll always be one to watch out for, I would think. Wherever he goes next, he will not forget the ones who 'wronged him'.
Even so, I think the last option is the best. It more thoroughly gets rid of the threat than the other two.
Good writing, Lebby. It's getting harder and harder to make good decisions here
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Smee
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| Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2006 1:47 am Post subject: |
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I think the stoat has defined the sort of character Stanimir is very well and agree that option 3 is the best way to go.
If you back down you are lost to the men as much as if you lose to him. Beating him will cement you as leader and allow progress to be made that much faster.
It's a gamble, but has to be done.
Great writing Lebby
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jnmrcs
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| Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2006 10:17 am Post subject: |
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| Fight him and if you can kill him... he desrve it.
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ethereal_fauna
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| Posted: Mon Mar 13, 2006 7:20 am Post subject: |
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Difficult decision. Now might not be the best time to make your stand. Certainly you will have to face this at some point. It's an eventuality, but perhaps consider the needs of the group before you conduct your personal battle.
You can step down voluntarily at this moment, and recruit the others to help watch your back. Stanimir will try to dispose of you, and when that time comes you'll have your opportunity to make your stand. It will give you that much longer to solidify your role as a leader and determine who to trust most within the group.
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Tue Mar 14, 2006 6:44 pm Post subject: Heroes Never Panic Poll Up |
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| Shady Stoat wrote: | | It's getting harder and harder to make good decisions here |
And this next poll will be no exception. I can't bring myself to just decide what will happen if the Captain challenges Stanimir to duel, so I'm leaving it up to fate.
The poll has three options that will be combined to determine whether or not the Captain challenges Stanimir. If those votes outnumber the other two options (the options to accept Stanimir or to leave), then I will choose the category with the most votes of the three challenges.
I have predetermined what each outcome is, so now it is up to the votes to decide. In the event of a tie, I'll P.M. another voter to make a final decision. The poll will last for 7 days.
I'm counting on you!
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Last edited by Lebrenth on Wed Mar 15, 2006 2:53 pm; edited 2 times in total
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jnmrcs
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| Posted: Wed Mar 15, 2006 3:28 am Post subject: |
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| Nice idea... I think
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Smee
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| Posted: Wed Mar 15, 2006 4:13 am Post subject: |
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It's a very cool idea.
I might have to do something similar if/when Trengin and Norral ever meet.
I've voted for Outcome 3 - fingers crossed it works in our favour.
Happy Writing
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dragon_fire372
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| Posted: Wed Mar 15, 2006 5:12 pm Post subject: |
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Finally I've caught up again. Very nice thus far, and I like the way you're doing your poll! Let fate decide...
Stanimir is bad news, and letting him get any grasp of power, no matter how temporarily, is a bad thing. Is there any way to can find out what he's proposing, or try to run him out with the help of the men, before challenging him? I suppose not. In that case, challenging is our option here.
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mr_moochie
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| Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 3:22 am Post subject: |
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| I went with challenge him, outcome #2. Lets see what it is...
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Solomon Birch
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| Posted: Fri Mar 24, 2006 10:10 am Post subject: |
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Well, I caught up, and I have to say, wow. An amazing story Lebreneth. The description, the characters, the plot, but more than anything the world. I'm really getting a feel for this desolate Victorian-esque nightmare; little things like blackpoweder weapons, the very 19th Century city (could be so many places; London, Prague, Bucharest), the militaristic way of life (obviously not helped by the undead...  ). Superb.
Shame I missed the poll, but I shall wait for the next one with, *ahem* bated breath... :biggrin:
*holds breath*
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Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Fri Mar 24, 2006 1:34 pm Post subject: Heroes Never Panic, Chapter 13 |
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Chapter Thirteen of "Heroes Never Panic"
"Stanimir," you say bluntly as you step forward. The men look nervous and uncertain, but you can't back off. If Stanimir isn't dealt with now, there's no knowing who he'll kill next.
Stanimir doesn't look surprised, but rather amused. He wastes no words, but draws his twin swords, throwing one with deftness and speed into the floor in front of you. His evil smile grows as you grip the handle. Manning gravely accepts your rifle and officer's saber as you hand them to him. You jerk Stanimir's sword from the floor, for it stuck in deeply and requires effort, and hold the blade a moment to get used to its weight. Stanimir waits patiently with his sword at his side with the group widening away from you as you prepare our duel.
Stanimir's sword, though not one you are particularly accustomed to, is well-balanced and not overly heavy. The length is a little more than you're used to as well, but you can adjust quickly. You know you must use all of your knowledge and experience to beat Stanimir. He is taller and stronger, but overconfident and hopefully heavy-handed. You must use his confidence against him, let him believe in a quick victory and strike a fatal blow. If it comes down to endurance or power, there is no competition. You will die.
"Warders... I want you to realize why this must be done," you say, taking advantage of the moment to reinforce the men in case you lose and to make Stanimir impatient, "It was no accident--"
"Get on with it, 'Captain'," Stanimir blurts out.
"I say it was no accident that Tamanee came to arrest Haymen! Stanimir made sure James Haymen would be arrested for this very purpose, to take over the Warders, and make them his own!"
"Are you going to fight or talk? Haymen was killing us all! It's our chance to-"
"To What!? Become your henchmen? Do you care about any of these men? What if they were arrested as well?"
And Stanimir lifts his sword, advancing on you like a mad bull. You retreat from him, causing the circle to run to get out of the way, but you have to use the environment to your advantage. You throw a chair to block his first swing, and you swipe at his knee. He dodges easily and slashes for your wrist.
You pull away in time to save your hand, but nearly lose the sword with the power behind his blade catching yours. You keep moving, but he's careful with his swings, not leaving any large openings as you dodge or block. You dodge around a support beam, the blade sinking briefly, just enough of an opening for a quick lunge. But again he dodges and catches your arm with his free hand. He smiles with gloating eyes as he prepares for the final blow. But the evil glint is not all you see. There is something wrong... his left eye isn't looking at you... it's wandering uselessly... you didn't notice before. He has a blind side!
You twist as you dodge his deadly thrust and free your arm, slicing a thin cut through his abdomen as you do. You hear a click, but you can't tell from where, nor do you have time to consider it as an enraged retaliatory attack narrowly misses your neck. You are too off balance to make another attempt at the opening but you get away, rolling over the table and standing on the opposite side waiting for him.
He's leaving more openings but he's not only strong, but fast, and as soon as you try to take advantage he avoids it. You continue watching his left eye, deviating slightly from center, but clearly not following your movement. You have to take advantage of his blind side.
Stanimir flips the table, nearly onto you, and he steps across and you move back toward the beam.
"Face me like a man, you worm!" he yells, but you ignore his taunts and wait for the next opening. He scrambles around the beam and you go opposite, keeping him guessing. He makes another impetuous swing and you swing back, high and on his left side!
The blade sinks deep, but into the wood beam. He dodges again, and now he forces you away from the beam, into the open. His left eye fastens its gaze upon you startlingly, as Stanimir makes another overpowered thrust. You are ready to deflect it, but it refuses your defense, forcing through with the tip burying deep into your belly.
The unnatural feeling is obscured as you fixate on the eye... the dead eye, which now appears black with a grey pupil, widening with intense interest in you. A black trail weeps from it like inverted smoke as you drop onto ground propped up by the sword impaling you.
Everything slows and becomes grey and blurry, but you can see the eye with absolute clarity. Its attention jumps away from you, narrowing as it looks at something behind you. You hear something very faint and distant. Stanimir dives but midway another sound, like a rifle igniting from across a field, tremors across the grey air. Somehow you can see it, the bullet itself fired from your own gun in the unerring hands of Gregory Manning. Stanimir can not escape his aim, and you watch as the bullet itself enters Stanimir's chest and into the side of his heart.
"NO! Captain!" Gregory Manning yells. His words are the only sound that still seems right. Your entire body has already given up. You can not move anything. Even the burden of breathing seems to have been taken. There is an inner peace, but all around, the grey air is trying to consume you. It feels afraid, anxious, urgent... and very angry. It tries to enter your mouth and nose... it digs into your eyes and scrapes at your ears, and seeps into your impaled abdomen.
Stanimir fights against the burning lead in his chest, but the Warders will not allow him to stand. Many blades draw and finish what the single bullet could not do, and the greyness attacks him with greater hunger. Like wasps defending their hive, it surrounds him, stings him with its fury. But the eye, through Stanimir's flesh and the blackening air, looks at you. You can not tell what it wants, or what it sees, but it does not seem to be afraid of the blackening swarm.
You feel startling warmth surrounding you, driving away the grey. It is Manning... there is a light about him that repels the grey. Some of the others have it too, but not like Manning. You can see him drenched in his emotions, as though they had substance. They evaporate from him into the darkness... an aura that distorts the air and burns it. The inner peace is returning and your body is nearly entirely dead. Your arms and legs are yours no longer, and you feel in a few moments there will be nothing left of you.
"Please Captain," you hear Manning say, his words seemingly the last real thing to you. "What do I do?"
Stanimir's eye looks at you, but somehow you don't think it is truly Stanimir at all. His body is nothing more than a black blot on your vision now, save the grey pupil of the eye, looking at you. It tries to distract you and confuse you, but its attempt is feeble. You speak your last words to Manning clearly and with a full presence of mind,
"You'll know. I'm dying, Manning, almost dead already. You must take the next step for me. The time has come for you to lead yourself." The peace fills your entire soul, there is no resisting it for it is part of you. It will take you soon. "Manning, did I ever tell you how much you look like my brother?"
"No sir," he can barely say, fighting his tears as his face twists with pain.
"You do. I suppose that means I haven't told you how much my brother looks like me," you say. Nothing remains but light. You can not see Manning or the grey any longer. You feel very light, almost to the point of lifting from the ground. "You're name isn't safe anymore, Private Gregory Manning, you're a deserter. You need mine. I'm not using it anymore, anyway. You're the captain now."
"You're the captain sir. You'll always be the captain," he says, but he will accept the torch in time. He has to... Tiersley is becoming too dark... far too dark.... Where is the eye? You're leaving too soon.
"Manning! The eye!"
But it is too late. Turning back does no good, for you are separated from your body and you can not return.
"Sir!" Bradshaw yells to Manning, pointing where Stanimir's body was.
"Where is he? Didn't anyone see?" Manning yells vengefully.
But no one knows. Somehow, Stanimir's body is gone.
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Last edited by Lebrenth on Sat Mar 25, 2006 7:46 pm; edited 4 times in total
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Fri Mar 24, 2006 3:33 pm Post subject: |
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Chapter 13. Unlucky for some eh?
Is this the end?
A shocker and no mistake.
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Smee
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| Posted: Fri Mar 24, 2006 3:41 pm Post subject: |
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Chinaren has it right.
Great chapter - So do we follow Manning now?
This needs some thought
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| Quote: | | "Manning, did I ever tell you how much look like my brother?" |
Happy Writing.
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Fri Mar 24, 2006 3:56 pm Post subject: |
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No, I don't think it has to end. The perspective is going to change though. No more "2nd person" narrative. It's good old 3rd person from here on, but Manning will be the new protagonist.
Thanks for your comments, Solomon! It got me motivated to write today instead of waiting a few days. The votes came through, and to my dismay, that's the way it turned up. Anyway, glad to have you in the story.
I also noticed the "13" coincidence when I started writing. Perhaps I shouldn't have tempted fate on such a fateful number, huh?
The decision point isn't very clear right now, sorry. I kind of got involved with the event. Anyway, every moment is an opportunity, right? ... If nothing else, I can move to the next chapter. I'm doing pretty good for ideas right now.
We'll figure it out.
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Sat Mar 25, 2006 12:08 am Post subject: |
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That's sad. Proper storygaming... but still sad.
I guess it's your job to make us take to Manning now. Let's hope he's up to the job before him...
*sigh* Great chapter Lebs
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Solomon Birch
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| Posted: Sat Mar 25, 2006 5:14 am Post subject: |
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*sits down mournfully next to Stoat* And I just got to know he too.... 
Great chapter Leb. Really got me feeling for the captain; his attempts at dodging seemed bleakly futile from the beggining... I kept thinking back to when the Captain was told Stanimar was the strongest slayer in the city, and it made it painful to read...
But al least we now get a chance to see good old Manning shine. He seems like he's going to make a good leader, and we know he's going to remember the Captain.
*holds sad breath*
_________________
"Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
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jnmrcs
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| Posted: Sun Mar 26, 2006 4:47 am Post subject: |
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Very nice chapter. Sadly but good.
Anyway, we have to see what Manning have...
And of course, take care of Staminir...
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ethereal_fauna
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| Posted: Mon Mar 27, 2006 4:27 am Post subject: |
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Definitely need to find out what happened to Stanimir's body. Perhaps it wasn't as corpse-like as they'd intended. Good passing of the torch though, to Manning.
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The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
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dragon_fire372
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| Posted: Mon Mar 27, 2006 7:24 pm Post subject: |
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Hmm, creepy eye...tell-tale heart! Ok, just kidding.
By the description of the eye, it sounds as though stanimir was merely a vessel, containing some kind of dark presense inside him. Perhaps it has something to do with all the undead - they all surrounded you after Stanimir had split, after all. He's done nothing but work for our downfall from the beginning. Back to the eye - if Stanimir was possessed by such an evil force inside him, then it seems obvious that that power will live on despite its host's death. Perhaps it will reclaim Stanimir's body, since it was robbed of the captain when Manning came over. In any case, we still have an enemy on the loose - and now noone is alive to know about it.
I think Manning ought to start asking around, find information. He'll remember the captain's last warning about the eye, even if it doesn't make sense. Ask about it, and search for Stanimir's body. That's my (long-winded) advice.
Great chapter by the way, albeit undeniably sad.
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Sorrow_A
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| Posted: Sat Apr 01, 2006 3:43 pm Post subject: |
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How smart is the average zombie? We know they're fast, powerful, and hardy, but how smart are they? Because I'm suspecting that Stanimir was a zombie, perhaps weaker or very intelligent.
Perhaps Stanimir wasn't human or zombie. Maybe he was a wraith or something more powerful? A vampire perhaps?
And how high are the walls around Tiersley? Could a zombie throw a rope up there? If so, I bet Tiersley is gonna be sieged soon...
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Wed Apr 12, 2006 3:50 pm Post subject: |
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| Sorrow_A wrote: | How smart is the average zombie? We know they're fast, powerful, and hardy, but how smart are they? Because I'm suspecting that Stanimir was a zombie, perhaps weaker or very intelligent.
Perhaps Stanimir wasn't human or zombie. Maybe he was a wraith or something more powerful? A vampire perhaps?
And how high are the walls around Tiersley? Could a zombie throw a rope up there? If so, I bet Tiersley is gonna be sieged soon... |
The "average" zombie is dumb. It is generally only interested in destruction and will do anything to achieve it, but may not have the cleverness to even turn a doorknob. However, zombies are known to evolve over time and especially when there is a lot of power in and around them. It is even possible to achieve human intelligence, under the right circumstances. It is common knowledge in Cassia that you can tell when they're getting smarter by certain signs. Pathfinding is one, where it is clear that they understand there is more than one way to get where they want to go. "Pathfinders" are more inclined to try turning doorknobs, finding alternate routes, such as a back door, or even burroughing or climbing. Then they evolve to "wielders", who use weapons such as clubs, rocks, swords, or anything of that nature. By then, they're just a notch above animal intelligence. Then you have "thinkers" who can load guns, work together to use battering rams, and call upon old memories and such. "Talkers" are the most evolved, who can, as the name suggests, talk. They probably know they're dead and they're as alert and coherent as any human. They still have unnatural strength as well.
The range and variety of undead defies total categorization, however. New tricks are often encountered when dealing with them.
The walls of Tiersley are about as good as you could hope for. At their high points, they're 30 feet high from within, and 35 feet from the dry moat on the outside. Certain parts of the wall are lower, even to a mere eight feet at one point, but those locations have concentrated military presence because of it, and they've gone to a lot of trouble to sandbag and barricade it with whatever they could pull together.
As it stands, Tiersley is officially considered beseiged already. Fortunately there has not been a large scale breech of security, but it is usually very sudden when it does happen and from there it gets worse by the second.
I should be writing another chapter tomorrow with more direction. I look forward to your responses!
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Wed Apr 12, 2006 5:49 pm Post subject: Heroes Never Panic, Chapter 14 |
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Chapter Fourteen of "Heroes Never Panic"
The eve of Hightidings is one of Gregory Manning's early memories. It was a day of sweets and presents, visiting neighbors with Mother, Father, and his little brother Thomas; eating all day and chasing around with the other kids. His favorite present was a little pop gun, but he gave it to Thomas. He always looked after his little brother. He remembers the way his father looked most of all because it was the last time he would see him alive.
His father was always laughing and playing tricks. He could juggle anything you gave him and make things disappear in his hands and pull them out behind your ear and so many other little tricks that over the years Gregory has struggled to remember. And he'd always have presents for him and his brother. And Mother was always happy too.
But not long after that, his father stopped coming home. They were used to him being gone for a week or two at a time, but after a month Gregory got scared. Then mother stopped smiling. He remembers waking up and seeing her crying in the kitchen, but she wouldn't tell him why. Soon he found out anyway.
Gladstonin didn't fear the dead back then. When they executed criminals, they left them out on display as a warning to others. Gregory found his father hanging from a noose behind the town hall. He found out where all the presents came from... he was a highwayman stealing from travelers. They say he'd killed some of them too. When the reeves found him crying at his father's feet, they found out who he was and soon they were knocking at the door of his house, coming to reclaim the stolen things.
They took everything but the house itself.
His mother worked hard to feed the kids, but sometimes the sadness was too much for her, and she could not bring herself to do anything at all. After a year, Thomas died of influenza, and Gregory almost died himself. In many ways, he felt like he should have.
Then one day Mother came home and she was smiling again. She gave Gregory a warm loaf of bread and fresh milk, and for the first time in a long time they had a meal like the old days. There was only one thing that overshadowed it.
Gregory never accepted the death of his father or brother, and when Mother made a meal, he immediately set plates out for four. At first she laughed. Then Gregory explained they were seats for Father and Thomas, and she became upset.
"It's not right, calling up the dead, Gregory. You should be ashamed," she said. She took the chairs and left them outside... and from that day forward, never brought them in again. Any time Gregory said anything about them, she would chastise him bitterly, sometimes putting him in the corner for hours. Once she even beat him for it.
After a few months, Gregory kept it to himself. Especially when he found out where the food came from this time.
Lord Pemberly didn't live in a castle, but he was the most powerful man in Gladstonin. His title had passed generation to generation for centuries, with a heritage in the great wars before the nations formed. He was married and thirty years older than Mother, but that didn't stop him from calling on her and giving her things. Eventually he convinced her to move in to work as a maid, but her real duties were entirely in the lord's bedroom.
Gregory had no friends while he lived in Pemberly Manor, and the only ones who talked to him at all were Lord Pemberly's sons, both nearly men, who delighted in tormenting him.
This life, such as it might be called, was safe and generally comfortable, but Gregory found himself dreaming about the past everyday.
On a day like any other, at a time no one would expect, the Cassian Army came to Gladstonin. There was no resistance at all. A little militia wouldn't stop this army anymore than a stone would stop a hurricane. Lord Pemberly himself was shot in the leg just to make a point.
Soon after they left the weary city, so did Gregory.
The mere fact he wasn't shot when he approached their camp told him that it was his destiny. He became a favorite amongst the soldiers, calling him good luck. They had him cleaning, and carrying and eventually hunting for them, and when they went back to Cassia, he went with them. And he was proud to wear the Cassian uniform and fight for Rescaprio and the Empire....
Captain John Taggert looked somewhat like his father, but it was more the way he cared about his men that made Gregory Manning follow him into Tiersley. And once again, death has taken from him. But this time he is not a mere boy. He's deadly with a sword and a dead shot with a rifle, and he will not be a victim.
"Find him! He can't be far away!" Manning yells at the exhausted men, scaring the fatigue from their muscles.
"Sir, the door is open!" a warder calls from the back.
"Everyone assemble outside now!" Like assembly in a war camp, everyone's military instinct returns to them and they find themselves forming up in military fashion outside. "Everyone stays in three man teams but spread out, we'll follow the blood trail till we find him. If you see Stanimir, do not engage! We'll close in on him together, understood?"
"Yes sir," the group calls out, feeling strangely reinforced by the drive and rigidity of his command.
"Go!"
And they spread out quickly, adrenaline fueling their urgent manhunt. Gregory follows in a command position, but only to keep the hunt organized and prevent the hunters from becoming the hunted. Stanimir took a bullet to the heart and more than a few sword blows and he's still moving, and must not be under estimated. Still, he'd rather be the first to find him.
The blood trail is not hard to follow, but though they move quickly, they do not see him. Even Manning's determination is not enough to keep them all at that pace, so they begin to follow much more slowly.
In time, and many blocks later, following the abandon region of the city near the wall, the blood ceases. Perhaps it simply ran out, but Stanimir's body is not to be seen.
"Sir," Bradshaw says to Manning aside and seriously. "If we go any farther we'll reach Carson Road.... It's the main road to Father's Gate and it will be swarming with Skulls. We can't go on, especially how we are."
As Bradshaw's bloodshot eyes look into Manning's he suddenly becomes extremely aware of himself and the situation. He looks for leadership, the way they looked at Taggert. They way he himself looked at Taggert. They're all haggard and yet they went with him without a single bullet or grain of black powder amongst them.
But if Stanimir gets away, what then? How long can he run? Perhaps others have seen him near Father's Gate....
The captain is gone... now Manning has to fend for even more than himself....
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Chinaren
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| Posted: Wed Apr 12, 2006 7:44 pm Post subject: |
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Nice chapter! Very nice! *awards Bronze medal for Nice chapter *
I like the history there, brings up nicely up to speed with the character.
Now, as much as they shouldn't let Stanny get away, they should all get slaughtered by the skulls as well. I would suggest trying to alert the skulls to Stans' presence maybe. Perhaps try and convince them to allow them through to hunt him, but don't put the gang in danger.
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2006 12:18 am Post subject: |
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Very good chapter Glad to see you back, Lebs.
I don't know that we need to pursue Stanimir any more. The men will never trust him again after this, you (although the 'you' has changed) no longer have a knife at your throat as leader. I think it's time to get some rest, some food and drink (assuming that what Stanimir was offering is still around) and try and think through your options after your men are a little less ragged.
I've lost track of the supply situation a little in the past few chapters. Is there any weaponry or ammunition left at the Warders Headquarters? Is there money to buy more? Do we have any resources at all?
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LordoftheNight
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| Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2006 4:38 am Post subject: |
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Good chapter once more, but I have to agree with Chinaren. S may not be a big interference at the moment, but he is still out there.
And M will propbably be angry at S, too angry to think straight about what he should or should not do.
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Solomon Birch
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| Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2006 9:49 am Post subject: |
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Yay! More zombie action now that Leb's back! :biggrin:
Good chapter once again Lebreneth, I feel that I know Manning much better now, and because he is the new main protag. that's important.
I think that they should avoid chasing Stanimar any further. Even if they do catch up with him, and there's no apparent gurantee of that, then they will be deep within Skull territory without sufficiant ammunition, and basically, screwed. 
So they should return to base, regroup, rest and get re-armed (if they can, otherwise they should go get some more). Though they may not like it, they are going to have to go out hunting again soon, so that they can start earning some money, but I think they are going to have to change thier tactics somewhat, seeing as though their last foray cost them lives and much ammunition for little or no reward. But more on that later.
*holds breath*
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2006 12:27 pm Post subject: |
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| Shady Stoat wrote: | | I've lost track of the supply situation a little in the past few chapters. Is there any weaponry or ammunition left at the Warders Headquarters? Is there money to buy more? Do we have any resources at all? |
The supply situation is this, like the chapter said, there is no ammunition on hand. BUT the tavern has an excellent supply of gunpowder and a good number of bullets (and bullets are easy to get/make). I may as well mention now that the main concern will be food. You won't starve right away, but it's getting scarcer and more expensive, and there's barely any non-perishable food storage at the tavern left (excluding alcohol!).
Haymen is the only one who knows the money situation for the warders. Some of them have chosen to keep their money themselves, but many warders have left most of their earnings in Haymen's care, and the warder treasury (you might call it) was also entirely in his care. How much is left and where he keeps it is also known only by him.
I should be going into better detail in a future chapter, as it seems most fit.
Happy to hear I was missed! Thanks everyone!
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:44 pm Post subject: |
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Visiting prisoners, as far as any of the warders know, is allowed. But under martial law (you better believe they're under martial law under these circumstances) it is dictated by military discretion. If they want to restrict visitors, they can.
Either way it shouldn't be difficult to find out where Haymen is being held.
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LordoftheNight
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| Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2006 4:06 pm Post subject: |
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Well, then - find out where he is, and try going to see him.
If you're prevented, try sneaking in at some time during the night - it's not as if you need to talk to him for long.
Maybe break him out, if he's being mistreated.
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jnmrcs
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| Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2006 5:20 pm Post subject: |
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| You can try to find Staminir. Don't go where the skulls can see you but maybe they will be some helpfull now. With the warders from one side and the skulls from the other... let's hope someone can kill him.
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Smee
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| Posted: Fri Apr 14, 2006 12:35 am Post subject: |
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Excellent chapter - highly useful back history.
Even if they find Stamnir what are they going to do to someone that can move after a bullet to the heart with no ammo between them?
Manning clearly has the support of his men to have gone this far, his position is secure. Get back, get rested and learn more of his new role. Locating the money, and other aspects of being the leader are of vital concern.
Happy Writing
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Ingrothechundyer
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| Posted: Sat Apr 15, 2006 9:08 am Post subject: |
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Sounds like it's high time to re-group and re-arm. Talking to Hayman if possible should be up there on the priority list.
Chasing shadows seems like the best way to get killed here
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ethereal_fauna
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| Posted: Sat Apr 15, 2006 2:30 pm Post subject: |
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As bad as it is to leave unfinished business, I agree that regrouping and rest is better than pursuing Stanimir. Contact Haymen and get abreast of the resources.
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Sorrow_A
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| Posted: Sat Apr 15, 2006 5:22 pm Post subject: |
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Let's review. You have most of your men, besides most of the main characters i.e. the Captain, the leader of the Warders, and Stanimir. You have empty guns and broken swords.
You are going after something not much is known about. We do know it's not human and it can take a bullet to the chest. We think it's a zombie, or something more powerful than a zombie.
If you chase it down and survive and kill it, you will be beset upon by hordes of a rival gang.
Gee, after reviewing all that information, I think it's best to stay inside, let the Skulls go outside, and head down to the pub for some drinks and ammo.
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Sun Apr 16, 2006 6:57 am Post subject: |
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Poll's up!
And I'd like to let everyone know that I'm going to start "Part Three" in its own subsection next chapter (and maybe I'll finally get the chapter summaries caught up!)
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Solomon Birch
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| Posted: Sun Apr 16, 2006 11:56 am Post subject: |
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Voted! Looking forward to part three Lebby!
*holds breath*
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mr_moochie
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| Posted: Sun Apr 16, 2006 5:34 pm Post subject: |
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| Voted. Good chap. Looking forward to the next one.
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dragon_fire372
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| Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 7:23 pm Post subject: |
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It seems practical to me to send most everyone back, but have the stealthiest few track him without engaging. After all, you don't want to lose track of him, but you can't just charge into enemy territory.
I sort of squeezed my vote into the last option, hoping it fit enough in with the above idea. Waiting for part 3!
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Sun Apr 23, 2006 8:27 pm Post subject: |
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END OF PART TWO
Part Three is up. Please leave feedback before proceeding by voting below.
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Ingrothechundyer
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| Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2006 3:13 am Post subject: |
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| Out of curosity did you put up a new poll or just rename the poll options?
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Solomon Birch
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| Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2006 3:58 am Post subject: |
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Really good stuff Lebby, and I love the changed perspective. Keeps it fresh and interesting.
Keep it up! :biggrin:
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"Humankind cannot stand too much reality" - T.S. Elliot
Thesopholis - A Noir Sci-Fi Story - Chapter 8 is up! Read it here
The End of the Voyage - Chapter 9
Shady the Furry Goblin! [Demon's, Satan and Slobadan Milosevic!] - Chapter 3
The Quest for the Legendary Rubber-Duckie! - Chapter 3
One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2006 6:02 am Post subject: |
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| Ingrothechundyer wrote: | | Out of curosity did you put up a new poll or just rename the poll options? |
Should have known better! The poll has now been deleted and reposted as it should have been! Thanks Ingro!
My apologies to anyone who voted on that last poll. Please vote again! Your feedback is greatly appreciated!
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Ingrothechundyer
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| Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2006 8:38 am Post subject: |
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| Thanks Lebrenth
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2006 10:58 am Post subject: |
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I hate voting for the politically correct option. So here's the judgement call to go with it.
I think your writing is pretty spot-on so far, Lebby. Every decision point leads to a major event of one sort or another. Even though the story has only covered a few days so far, there has been a wealth of detail and a great plot that's advanced with major consequences at times.
We've seen action, we've seen riddles, we've seen quick thinking and character building. This story has the lot. Well done so far
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Solomon Birch
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| Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2006 11:22 am Post subject: |
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Hahaha! Good one Shady, but I have to agree. The writing is well paced, the characters interesting and deep. The settings and detail are vivid and atmospheric. And the decision points are clever, give the reader a good angle to vote from, and the outcomes are always fun and surprising. Taggert's death was really a shock, and very well done. Really quite *sob* emotional...
Keep it up! :biggrin:
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One Last Bullet.... Chapter 3
Green Eyes - Chapter 5
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LordoftheNight
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| Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2006 12:43 pm Post subject: |
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I only have one trouble, and that is the poll below - there aren't enough options, so I was forced to go with just tight, as anything else would have been wrong.
And reading through that made no sense what-so-ever. My apologies.
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Lebrenth
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| Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:10 pm Post subject: |
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I'm thrilled that I've corralled you into making a positive vote, Lordy, but please tell me what you would have voted if the option was available.
Thank you for your kind remarks everyone ! Makes me feel all warm inside.
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| In Part Two, how do you feel the pacing of the story has gone? |
| Too Fast, needs more detail |
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0% |
[ 0 ] |
| Too Slow, needs more action |
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0% |
[ 0 ] |
| Just Right |
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100% |
[ 11 ] |
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| Total Votes : 11 |
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