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Chinaren
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 Posted: Sat Nov 12, 2005 7:42 am Post subject: |
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| In this case, it is indeed a volcano. Along with all the others, unfortunately. Stoat is very good with details.
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D-Lotus
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| Posted: Sat Nov 12, 2005 9:54 pm Post subject: |
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You never know for sure the authors intent! 
_________________
 Chapter 5: The Rendezvous 
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Sun Nov 13, 2005 2:50 am Post subject: |
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| D-Lotus wrote: | | You never know for sure the authors intent! |
I do 
Just to settle the argument, they're meant to be metaphors
You don't really think I'd tell you what was going in advance, do you? 
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| Posted: Sun Nov 13, 2005 4:03 am Post subject: |
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| Metaphorical volcanoes and trolls. Interesting. I dread to know what they really are then, if you compare them to those two...
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 3:27 am Post subject: |
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It seems the volcano won explosively
Sight-seeing it is. I should have this one up soon. It's going well (so far!).
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 7:45 am Post subject: |
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| I've written the next chapter of Best of Three. I can't post it, though, because of the tiny text in Hyperion's mail. Once it's sorted, you'll get chapter six in all its inglory.
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Smee
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| Posted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 10:14 am Post subject: |
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So can we have the next chapter now 
_________________
The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
Last edited by Smee on Mon Nov 14, 2005 10:28 am; edited 1 time in total
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| Posted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 10:28 am Post subject: |
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Hyperion,
I deleted your post as it was causing the page to go all kittywhompas on us.
All is normal in the Sanitarium once again. Please conitnue to skip your meds and enjoy life through the delirium.
Last edited by Random on Mon Nov 14, 2005 11:00 am; edited 1 time in total
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 10:30 am Post subject: |
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You wanted sight-seeing? You got it!
CHAPTER SIX
Larry looked at the envelopes. He could feel sweat trickling down the sides of his cheek. Images of Pyros and Timdra danced in front of his vision, and he wondered if the dragon had bothered to cook his food before eating it.
Oh god! He didn’t want to die!
He racked his brains for the safest option. It had to be pampering. He was dealing with an overgrown cat here, for goodness sake! What better way to soften her up than to put her through a regime of stroking and massaging, grooming and beautifying, hot springs and mud-baths…
The last two brought him to a screaming halt. Not pampering then.
Activity? He shuddered, imagining the sort of activities that an overgrown carnivore might have in mind. She’d said that she wouldn’t kill, maim or eat one of her mates… but she hadn’t made the same promise about one of her dates!
His shaking hand hovered over the envelopes… and then swooped down on the third one. Sight-seeing. How bad could it be?
He forced himself not to answer that question.
“Let’s open the envelope and find out where you’re going, my loves,” said Brilla, twinkling at the crowd.
For a moment, Larry hoped that she would release her grip on his shoulder, so he could get the hell out of here. All she did, though, was look at him expectantly, then nod towards the envelope.
He slumped in resignation. Taking the paper from its wrapping, he slid it into his sweating palms.
“Well?” purred Suki. “Rrread it out, darrrling.”
Larry squeaked. Then he cleared his throat and began again.
“A… a trip to the… to the Living Lands of… uhh… D’oz?” he stammered.
“Thaaaaat’s right!” boomed the voice-over, oozing fake jollity. “Larry Cludge and Suki Marrauwl, you have chosen to visit the spectacular world of D’oz. While you’re there, you will see the wonders of the Singing Forest; and why not take a boat ride in Waterspray Lagoon? You can sample the local delicacies, have fun in the sun and even…” (the voice became grotesquely suggestive, much to Larry’s discomfort), “sample the spectacular night life of this popular tourist world. No expense will be paid to make this into a truly memorable Buh-liiiiiiiind Date!”
The crowd applauded in a hysterical frenzy. Larry, searching for any speck of comfort, looked to the back of the audience where the spectacular blonde had been. There was no sign of her, and he wondered if he had hallucinated the whole thing.
A moment later, he was dragged into the wings by a group of stage-hands with pink wings. He was relieved to see Suki being dragged in the opposite direction.
Not that she was the worst of the three by any means. In fact, he could quite like her, if he could be sure of ending the date with his usual number of limbs, all in their usual places. Right now, though, he needed some time to himself, to relax and figure out what was going on, to meditate on the best solution to his current problems, to get his head around this whole freakish set of events, to…
It was not going to happen.
The winged technicians dumped him firmly in front of the giant badger again. She was still carrying the clipboard and she still wore the shades. The pirate earring, however, was gone in favour of a large, dangling pom-pom in pink. It looked like she was wearing a granny-slipper on the side of her head.
“Good evening Mr. Cludge,” she said, briskly. “We need to get you ready for your date. Now – have you any requirements? Next of kin to inform? Wills to write? Special allergies, any lurking health problems you want us to know about? No? Well then, off to the costume department with you. They’ll sort you out. Goodbye Mr. Cludge… and good luck.”
She nodded to flip-top Satan who, with a jaw-and-a-half worth of grin, advanced on Larry. This time, Larry knew better than to fight him. Numb with resignation, he followed in the enormous creature’s wake. They trudged through narrow backstage corridors, twisting and turning back on themselves until Larry’s sense of direction had gone completely. Not that it mattered, of course. Even SatNav wasn’t going to help him get back home this time!
Finally, Satan-head pushed open a bright red door and shoved Larry in through it. He stumbled, hearing the catch click firmly closed behind him. Then he looked around.
The costume department. He should have expected it! There were two doors leading out – one behind him, one directly opposite. There were racks of material, all hanging from wire trolleys. There were tubes and sprays and bottles of brightly coloured liquids. There was also what looked like a screaming human figure, encased in a block of crystal, right in the middle of the floor. Around it, burbling like a trio of drunken mermaids, were three green warty antennae-headed creatures. The same three, no doubt, that had attended to Brilla and her melting problem
Larry attempted to carve his way through the door with his shoulder-blades.
“Nonono!” he gabbled. “You don’t understand. I don’t need anything. I’m fine. Really. No costumes! Please!”
He didn’t know what they had planned – but after seeing Brilla’s ‘change of clothes’, he knew it couldn’t be anything good!
“I’m fine,” he repeated, looking desperately down at his plaid pyjamas. “These are just…”
It was too late. The creatures were upon him. Arms and hands reached out. He tried to brush them away, but there were too many to keep track of. They pulled and tugged and unbuttoned, while Larry protested and squirmed and evaded. All it would have needed was an Oom-Pah Band, and it could have passed for the world’s slowest Bavarian Folk Dance, as Larry retreated around the room, slapping hands and clutching the ever-diminishing remains of his clothing.
All the time, the creatures burbled to themselves, eating the torn pieces of pyjama as they came free. Finally, Larry came to a halt, realising that the last bastion of defence was gone. He was clutching the final piece of plaid material, and it was smaller than a postcard!
He threw it down on the floor, hands thrown out in surrender.
“Okay, okay! You win! Just don’t put me in a bodysuit.”
The creatures went into a three-way burble again. Then one of them squelched over to the other door. A warty hand enclosed the handle and tugged. Larry turned around and gaped.
A raven-haired female stood framed in the doorway. She was tall, angular, beautiful. At least, she would have been, if not for the extra eye and the sabre-teeth. Exquisitely coiffeured and elegantly dressed, she held a pair of large steel scissors in her hands.
She looked him up and down, appraisingly. Then she looked him up and down again.
“Oh ffnnno,” she snorted, lisping through her tusks. “Fffthat just won’t fffdo.”
She flexed her scissors, making a sharp ‘snip-snip’ noise. “It’ll ffnnhave to go.”
Larry’s nerve snapped. He whirled and made a dash for the opposite door.
At least that was the plan.
What actually happened was this:
He turned, caught his foot on one of the warty antenna-heads, curved in a graceful arc through the air, flailed, managed a perfect one-point landing on the flat of his jaw…
…and for a countless time, saw nothing but stars…
----------
Stars.
Larry opened his eyes, his vision wavering groggily. He was sitting in a leather seat, strapped tightly around the waist and chest (now why wasn’t that surprising?). There was a wide glass panel, straight ahead. It looked out on a black sky littered with stars. He felt strangely weightless, as he watched the stars slowly recede.
His jaw hurt. Exactly how much time had passed since he… since the scissors had…
Larry squeaked in remembrance. His hands quickly explored various parts of himself, looking for any additions or subtractions to his body’s inventory. His heart descended from his throat as he realised very little had changed.
Strangely, he appeared to have more hair now. A full head of it, in fact. It was moulded stiffly into place with some sort of hair gel or spray (he shuddered as he considered the gaseous rodent from make-up), but it felt good. He only hoped they wouldn’t take it all back at the end of the show. Then he realised he should be more concerned with whether he made it to the end of the show!
He looked down at the clothes they had dressed him in. A Hawaiian-style shirt -presumably this was universal for all tourists everywhere – and a pair of tackle-tight canvas shorts. Brown socks and hairy leather sandals. Not good, but it could have been much worse.
He began to relax… then a green furry paw landed on his bare knee. He lurched against the restraining straps and jerked his head around to the side.
Suki was sitting beside him, similarly strapped down. She stared at him from luminous amber eyes.
“Wakey wakey, loverrr,” she purred. “We’rrre nearrrly therrre.”
“Uhhh,” said Larry, stupidly. He could feel the light pressure of her claws on his lower thigh. He could feel a tighter pressure elsewhere.
“See,” she said, pointing behind them to the gap in the seats.
Larry craned his head around. The front of the space shuttle lay just behind them. It was unmanned, although there were lots of blinky lights on a wide console. Through the front window, he could see an orange and green planet, filling most of the screen and expanding fast.
“Arrren’t you excited, Misterrr Cludge? Orrr should I call you Larrry?” Her hand inched a tad higher.
“Excited. Yeah.” He managed, gulping. Terrified was more like it, but some instinct warned him that it would be foolish to say that to a cat.
A moment later, the pod started to decelerate. Gravity dragged at them as the entered the atmosphere of the planet. There was heat, weight, noise, pressure… and finally a jolt as the ship landed.
“We’rrre herrre,” husked the feline, taking a sharp claw to the restraining straps and slicing them neatly. Larry hurried with the buckles on his bindings, just in case Suki decided to hand out the same treatment to him.
The lioness stood up and offered a paw to Larry. Seeing no obvious alternative, he took it and they walked to the shuttle door together. It opened as they approached, and a number of glassy steps unfolded to the ground.
Larry stepped out of the pod and stared like the most Japanese Japanese-tourist ever!
It was incredible! The sky was a dusky orange, bathed in the light of a massive red sun. The ground was the cracked orange of badly-baked terracotta, except for a few areas lush with glowing yellow-green grass.
To the left of them, in the distance, was a lilac-leafed treeline. To the right, a set of buildings that looked like they had been designed with Grimm’s fairytales in mind. Unfortunately, it hadn’t quite worked. The effects ranged from ‘The Bank of Gingerland’ to ‘The Woodcutter’s Cottage-osoft Inc.’. Directly ahead was a welcoming committee.
Ignoring, for the moment, the raft of technicians, prop-carriers, directors and camera pixies, the committee was four-strong. It consisted of a large brown bear walking on its back legs (and attempting to pick its nose with a large claw), a dwarf dressed in red velvet with a cap that even the class dunce wouldn’t be seen dead in, a large, rotund man with a florid face and, behind the three of them…
The blonde???
There she was, knees and all! She was dressed in a white fake-princess outfit (complete with paste and tinfoil crown) and carrying a tray of refreshments. She seemed not to notice him as she picked and rearranged at the bite-sized treats before her.
“Welcome, welcome, my little lovebirds,” said the fat man. His face lit in a jovial beam. “This is your very special day on D’oz. We hope you’ll have a good time, and don’t forget…”
He pointed behind them to a previously unnoticed set of levitating cameras.
“There’ll be sixty-three trillion people watching, so you’d better justify their license fees. Otherwise, we just might have to…” he made a quick slashing motion in front of his throat. “…cut you off.”
Larry’s eyes were open so wide that he could virtually see into the back of his skull. What was that supposed to mean?
“Now – where would you like to go next, you little rascals,” chuckled the tour supervisor. “You have the choice of…”
Horrible tinny music started playing softly behind them.
“…the Singing Forests… Waterspray Lagoon… a Tour of the Village of D’oz… or refreshments at the Café Rejectus.”
“Let’s go to the forrrest,” rumbled his date, putting a heavy paw on Larry’s shoulder. “Forrrests always make me feel so… mmmm... alive.”
She fixed him with burning eyes. Larry opened his mouth, not sure what he was going to say…
Last edited by Shady Stoat on Sat Feb 11, 2006 8:09 am; edited 1 time in total
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ethereal_fauna
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| Posted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 10:37 am Post subject: |
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Hit the cafe first. Maybe she'll be more docile with a full belly.  Then you can sneak away while she takes her 12 hour nap.
_________________
The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
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D-Lotus
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| Posted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 11:32 am Post subject: |
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Yeah, and maybe you can talk to that blonde while she's sleeping. Anyway, the Cafe seems a prety safe place.
_________________
Chapter 5: The Rendezvous
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Smee
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| Posted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 1:09 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | Anyway, the Cafe seems a prety safe place. |
Unless Larry is on the menu
Go for the Singing Forest, maybe it'll make her fall asleep.
_________________
The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
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Key
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| Posted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 2:40 pm Post subject: |
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I wouldn't disagree with Suki if I were Larry.
Go to the forest.
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| Posted: Tue Nov 15, 2005 3:19 am Post subject: |
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| Mhm. I think that a sleeping Suki is a good Suki. If you have a dangerous feline around, you don't leave it NEAR you...
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D-Lotus
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| Posted: Wed Nov 16, 2005 9:30 pm Post subject: |
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Now that I think of it, Larry doesn't have much will to say: NO, lets go to the cafe. He'd probably just go along with the cat thing.
_________________
Chapter 5: The Rendezvous
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Fri Nov 18, 2005 12:37 pm Post subject: |
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| There's a 3 day poll up. Vote now, vote later, I don't care - just vote
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The Powers That Be
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| Posted: Sat Nov 19, 2005 6:19 pm Post subject: |
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I voted for the cafe. Perhaps the blonde will be there, and perhaps there'll be a chance to talk.
_________________
Abduction! is in the Stasis Hall, but read it anyway!
Got a problem? Write to Dear Dotty!
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D-Lotus
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| Posted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 5:25 pm Post subject: |
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I think this blonde is the key to the story.
_________________
Chapter 5: The Rendezvous
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Mon Nov 21, 2005 12:39 pm Post subject: |
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The voters have spoken. Larry and Suki will be enjoying refreshments at the Cafe Rejectus.
*starts scribbling...*
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Smee
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| Posted: Mon Nov 21, 2005 12:44 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | Be a Stoat: The world needs more Stoats |
 That seems familiar
_________________
The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Mon Nov 21, 2005 12:47 pm Post subject: |
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| Smee wrote: | | Quote: | | Be a Stoat: The world needs more Stoats |
That seems familiar |
Just checking if you were still paying attention... *toothy grin*
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Smee
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| Posted: Mon Nov 21, 2005 1:13 pm Post subject: |
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I'm as alert as ever.
_________________
The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
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D-Lotus
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| Posted: Mon Nov 21, 2005 7:10 pm Post subject: |
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What was that all about?
_________________
Chapter 5: The Rendezvous
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Mon Nov 21, 2005 11:48 pm Post subject: |
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| D-Lotus wrote: | | What was that all about? |
I was between sigs. so I decided to put "Be a stoat: the world needs more stoats" (in direct competition to Smee's current sig.)
It took the great Smee-Slug less than 10 minutes to spot it.
So, in answer to your question - nothing much, really
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Tue Nov 22, 2005 8:36 am Post subject: |
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The Cafe Rejectus... as ordered
CHAPTER SEVEN
It was the knees that decided him. He cleared his throat and tried to smile winningly at Suki.
“Ahh… why don’t we have something to eat first?” he said, with all the fake brightness of children’s TV presenter. “You must be hungry after all that… all that… err… competing earlier.”
He had been intending to say ‘all that fighting’. Thinking about it, however, he didn’t want to reawaken Suki’s competitive streak. Not when there was a chance of him getting closer to the blonde. Somehow, her image was locked firmly into his head; the way she looked, the way her hair glinted in the light, the way she moved…
Maybe it was something to do with the fact that she was less than four paces away from him. He tried not to look too closely – or at least not to allow Suki to observe him looking too closely.
He needn’t have worried. Suki was gazing straight at the fake log cabin that was ‘The Café Rejectus’. Her eyes narrowed as she considered… then finally she nodded her head.
“Yes,” she purred. “Let’s go and eat. Afterrr all, we’rrre going to need to keep ourrr strrrength up. Forrr laterrr.”
Larry’s heart gave an uncomfortable lurch as he considered the meaning of those words. Still, concentrating on the ‘now’ seemed to be a good survival strategy. It had got him this far, hadn’t it?
Random muscles began to dance in his cheek again.
The ‘Mayor’ (as Larry had begun to think of the fat man) smiled jovially. “Walk this way,” he said, and began to waddle towards the café.
Larry ignored the insane urge to imitate the Mayor’s rolling gait, and instead tried to keep his eyes from wandering to the blonde’s derriere as it swayed sensually from side to side, ahead of him.
All too soon, though, the walk was over. The Mayor gestured the two of them inside.
Larry and Suki stepped into an idyllic wood-beamed lodge. It had chairs, tables and counters carved from great stumps of lilac-tinted trees. There was a delicate golden leaf effect, painted over the wood-plank floor, like a mosaic. Large square windows let in the red-gold light from outside, and the smell of tree-sap mingled with tasty aromas of baking bread and meat.
That was the good part. At this point, it all started to go horribly wrong.
Cages lined the walls, running from floor to ceiling. Each one was full of animals; a different species in each cage. Squirrels, weasels, tiny little puppy dogs, something wormlike and slimy that filled almost an entire cage of its own. Every creature appeared to have something wrong with it. Too many arms, not enough heads, a sense of balance that would make a drunkard blush, a tail three times as long as the rest of the body put together. Mouths (where there were mouths) opened and closed in silent bleats, baa-s, chitters, squeaks and barks. The fact that no sound emerged made Larry feel quite queasy. He wondered what atrocities – beyond the obvious ones, of course – had been performed on these innocent creatures.
Suki, on the other hand, looked around with gleaming eyes.
“Ahh,” she breathed. “Good choice, Larrry.”
For a moment, Larry did a good impression of the caged animals. His mouth opened and shut, but he failed to make a sound. With difficulty, he unglued his eyes from the bizarre creatures and focussed on his bizarre date instead. What he saw did not reassure him. The cat was looking far too predatory for comfort!
A four-foot high sylph, wearing the kind of pink dress normally seen at a five-year-old’s birthday party, saw them to their seats.
“Welcome to the Café Rejectus we hope you enjoy your time here,” said the Sylph, in one rapid sentence, her voice as sweet and high-pitched as a piccolo. “Can I get you something to drink?”
A drink, thought Larry. Oh yeah, definitely!
“Could we have some… some wine, please?” he asked.
The sylph took a deep breath. “Certainly, Sir. We’ve got…
“White wine, bright wine, red wine, dead wine, green wine, spleen wine, peppermint-cream wine, elderberry, elderflower, lotusflower, crocusflower and goldenshower wine, we’ve got goat wine, stoat wine, burn-down-your-throat wine, house wine and grouse wine, moose wine, spruce wine, fat-fairy-juice wine, we’ve got fine wine and pine wine, dandywine and brandywine, bug wine, slug wine, slug slime…”
A large green paw batted the sylph effortlessly backwards, where she landed on a very solid-looking table. She uttered a high-pitched bleat and fluttered upright, shimmying her shoulders to try and unkink her wings.
“Give us something interrresting,” said Suki, coolly. “And some food. I’m starrrving.”
“Certainly, Madam,” began the Sylph, tremulously. “We have…”
“I’ll have some squirrrrrrel,” growled the lioness, flexing her claws with a threatening ‘schnick’.
“A good choice, Madam,” squeaked the Sylph. “Would you care to choose your meal?”
Suki’s eyes darted to the squirrel cage. She followed the movements of the little rodents, a playful smile curling her features.
“I’ll have… that one. And that one, too. Just heat them until they wrrrriggle, then brrring them strrraight overrr,” she purred.
“And you, Sir?” The waitress turned polite attention to Larry.
He felt as green as Suki’s fur. He’d never even been able to face eating lobster when the restaurants had them in tanks. Even trout made him uncomfortable, with the way it stared at him on the plate!
Once he was sure he could speak without throwing up, he asked:
“Have you… have you got a vegetarian option?”
The Sylph tilted her head, doubtfully.
“We have, Sir, but…”
Larry swallowed. “I’ll take it.”
“But Sir, there are many better…”
“I don’t want anything better. I just want something…” he swallowed. “…safe.”
“If Sir is sure? Blachart eggs are rather an acquired taste, Sir, and if…”
“Look – just get me the damned eggs, okay?” snapped Larry, wiping a greasy sheen of sweat from his brow.
“As Sir wishes.” The Sylph curtsied and fluttered away.
“Ooooh, Larrry,” breathed Suki, leaning over the table towards him. “I do enjoy it when you’rrre forrrceful.”
“You do?” Larry’s eyebrows raised up into his brand-new thatch of hair.
She smiled, not entirely pleasantly. “Gives me something to worrrk on, loverrr-boy.”
Larry tried to digest that. It gave him heartburn.
He changed the subject, attempting small-talk while his eyes scanned the room for any traces of the blonde beauty.
“So… Suki… how did you get involved in the show?”
She brushed a clawed paw through her thick mane of hair. “I enterrred, of courrrse. The prrrogrrram is verrry popularrr on my worrrld. And besides, I thought it would do me good to get some morrre experrrience with rrrelationships.”
“You… don’t… have… experience with relationships?” Larry asked, cautiously.
“Forrr my worrrld, I’m considerrred extrrremely prrrudish,” answered the cat. “Barrrely fifty mates in the last yearrr – and some of them only once. At a time.”
Larry managed to choke on his own saliva. While he was spluttering and struggling for breath, the blonde chose that moment to reappear. She held a dark brown bottle and two glasses in her slim fingers. Her gaze flicked flirtatiously at him, from under lowered eyelids. She bent over the table in her tacky princess outfit, almost, but not quite, staying inside it. After pulling the cork from the bottle (with enough jiggling to make Larry’s eyes pop), she poured a darkish amber liquid into the glasses, flashed a coy smile and wandered away again.
His head turned to watch her go. Suddenly, there was a sharp agony in his calf.
“Oh, I’m sorrrry,” Suki apologised with a glint in her eye. “Did I catch you with my spurrrs, darrrling?”
“I… uhh… ahh…”
“Cheerrrrs.” The lioness lifted one of the delicate glasses in her paw, chinking it against Larry’s glass.
Still wheezing for breath, Larry hastened to return his attention to where it should be. He lifted the glass, wiped his streaming eyes and took a sip. Then he promptly spat it out again.
“Yeeuurghh!” he shuddered. “What is this stuff? Tastes like cat pi… like… ahh… like really bad wine,” he finished, lamely.
Suki’s eyes narrowed. Her mouth opened slightly, revealing teeth that glinted and pointed just a little too much. Larry held his breath.
Fortunately, one of the camera orbs chose this moment to attempt a close-up. Distracted, the feline turned and batted the floating disk away. It swooped back immediately, and she swiped again. Larry watched, wondering what the audience were making of this show. Watching kittens with balls of string was all very well, as long as you weren’t playing the part of the ball of string!
The camera-ball apparently didn’t know when to quit. There were at least five visible dents in it by the time the food arrived. Once again, the blonde princess came out to serve it. At this point, Suki decided that some things were more important than shiny silver cameras. Larry got no opportunity to stare at blonde hair or perfect knees as the plates were set before them.
He looked instead at the food. It could have been worse, he supposed. The squirrels were, at least dead. Yes, they still had all their fur. Yes, their eyes were still in the process of glazing over. Yes, he thought he could still see one of the forepaws twitching… but it could have been worse.
Larry quickly turned his attention from the rodents before they could begin to stare at him. His own dish looked rather appetising. There was a mound of what looked like scrambled eggs in a pale blue colour, with dark brown crusty bread beside it. Long white strings of vegetable matter looked, if not appealing, then at least edible.
He hesitated, then tucked in. Whatever happened, it couldn’t be worse than the wine!
A smile snuck onto his face. This was good! With the waitress talking about ‘an acquired taste’, he had expected to be munching on something that tasted like an overripe armpit – but no. The eggs were tangy yet delicate, the bean-like vegetables were a crunchy delight and the bread tasted like it had been fresh-baked minutes ago. Together, they melted his taste-buds into a quivering mass of delight.
Suki, on the other hand, looked slightly disappointed in her meal. She poked the squirrels once or twice, just to make sure that they weren’t going to do anything interesting. Then, without much enthusiasm, she began to tear chunks of meat off the corpses with her claws. It was only when she was halfway through the first one that she seemed to find a new enjoyment in eating. As she tore through the rest of the first squirrel, she waved a paw at the Sylph.
“Bring me ‘nother,” she munched, cracking bones with her powerful jaws. “’n fact – bring me two more. ‘nks.”
Larry began to feel a little more hopeful. If she stuffed her belly full of food, maybe she would sleep for a while. Maybe he could take the chance to talk with the mysterious blonde in her absence.
Or maybe she was simply storing energy for the rest of the day’s activities. He slumped again.
The meal was interrupted at this point, by an elvish-looking man, carrying a violin. His slanty eyes smouldered as he tucked the instrument under his chin and began to play. Somebody drew the curtains and lit candles, leaving Larry feeling vaguely ridiculous. From the position of the sun, he was guessing that this was lunchtime, and he was not feeling in the least romantic.
The elf continued, oblivious. He circled the table, swooping forward to address his music first to the cat, then to the human. He swayed, he danced, he leered at each of them in turn. It was very off-putting.
Suki seemed to agree.
“Do you play rrrequests?” she asked in a low purr.
The elf smiled flirtatiously. His fingers flew as he answered, “For you, loveliness, anything.”
“Then go play somewherrre else.”
“Sorry, my sweet. No can do. They’re using this as one of the photo-shots,” replied the elf, flicking his long fingers over the strings.
Suki watched the strings thoughtfully.
“The thing about strrring instrrruments,” she announced conversationally to Larry, “is the materrrial from which they make the strrrings.”
Her movements were a blur. There was a per-twang, a ripping of fabric, an ‘oof’ and a long drawn-out elvish wail.
“Catgut.” She finished, watching the elf hobble away, doubled over in pain. Larry winced. He was sure that a violin should never be used in that way. It would certainly never sound the same again, even if it could be extracted!
She flashed him another cat smile. “And now, if you’ll excuse me, I should find the ladies’ grrrooming rrroom.”
She rose gracefully from her seat and headed towards a screened alcove at the far end of the restaurant. Before the door had swung shut behind her, Larry was already looking for his mystery girl.
He saw a flash of blonde hair disappearing into the kitchens. With one more nervous glance toward the bathroom door, Larry rose from his seat. He went over to the serving counter and peered over it to the kitchen doorway. From the little of the room he could see, there was no sign of her.
“Hello?” he called out, in a voice that simultaneously tried to be loud and quiet.
“Can I ‘elp you?”
A stranger came to stand in the kitchen doorway. He was an old man with a stooped back. Bent over as he was, he stood barely five feet high. Grease seemed to swim off his skin, and his face was a mass of boils, pimples, moles and warts. Four thin strands of hair were teased over his scalp in the ultimate baldy comb-over. His clothes looked like they had been borrowed from a local vagrant and there was a strange smell of cabbage about him.
“Err… err…” stammered Larry. “I was looking for… well… the girl with the blonde hair?”
“The one with the knees?” asked the old man, shrewdly.
“Yes! Yes, that’s the one!”
“She’s fillin’ in ‘ere. What do you want with ‘er?” the man peered at him suspiciously.
Larry hesitated a moment. Then he decided on the honest approach. There was no time for anything else.
“I… err… I want to get to know her better. She seems… nice, I don’t know. I just hoped I could meet her. Talk to her a bit. Maybe, when this date is over, we could…”
“Ah.” The old man gave a measured nod. “I see. Well, the girls don’t usually fraternize with the customers – but seeing as she an’ you are only ‘ere for the day – I don’t s’pose it’d do no ‘arm.”
He raised his voice to a nasal shriek.
“XANDARA! SOME BLOKE ‘ERE WANTS TO GET YOUR NUMBER!”
“Rrrrrreally?”
From the way Suki’s ‘R’s were rolling, Larry knew instantly that he was in trouble. He whirled around, and she was less than eight inches behind him.
He gulped.
“Forrrget the second courrrse of squirrrrels,” snapped the cat as her claws dug into Larry’s forearm. “It’s time to get on with the date, loverrr.”
Before he could utter a word of protest, he was dragged out into the alien sunshine again. The welcoming committee stood exactly where they had been. It was almost as if no time had passed. Only Larry’s queasy digestion attested to his visit to the café. That, and Suki’s newly resentful disposition.
“I hope you two enjoyed your meal,” said the Mayor with twinkling smile. “Now then – what’s next for our special guests? The Forest? The Lagoon? The Village? Or would you like to take in a show?”
Last edited by Shady Stoat on Sat Feb 11, 2006 8:10 am; edited 1 time in total
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Smee
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| Posted: Tue Nov 22, 2005 9:21 am Post subject: |
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Excellent - he at least managed to eat something, and found out the blonde's name. Things are looking up.
Where next ...?
It's got to be the show. A crowded place, concentration on the stage etc should leave little opportunity for anything else to happen.
Of course he'll have to persuade Suki to go for it.
Happy Writing.
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The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
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D-Lotus
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| Posted: Tue Nov 22, 2005 8:00 pm Post subject: |
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I agree, anything that demands Suki's attention is good for Larry. Go for the show.
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Chapter 5: The Rendezvous
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ethereal_fauna
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| Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2005 3:16 am Post subject: |
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She just might get the impression that he is ignoring what she wants to do (which would be correct, but not necessarily healthy to reveal).
Maybe suggest a quick trip to a shop, preferably one where he could purchase a kevlar vest, and then let her decide where to go.
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The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Chinaren
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D-Lotus
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| Posted: Fri Nov 25, 2005 7:22 pm Post subject: |
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Nice avatar, Chinaren. When's the poll up?
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Chapter 5: The Rendezvous
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Fri Nov 25, 2005 11:20 pm Post subject: |
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| By popular request... (well, one person asked, anyway)... the poll's going up. 3 days, as usual. Votes please...
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D-Lotus
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| Posted: Sat Nov 26, 2005 11:27 am Post subject: |
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I voted for the show. Lets hope its entertaining.
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2005 11:42 pm Post subject: |
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| Aaaaand they're going to the forest. Penultimate chapter coming up - as soon as I've written it.
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 9:13 am Post subject: |
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The Singing Forest Chapter.
Chapter Eight
Larry considered his options. He had got as far as ruling out Waterspray Lagoon (putting a cat near that much water seemed akin to cooking with hot fat in a nudist colony) when Suki took matters into her own paws.
“We want to go to the Forrrest.” Her claws bit further into his forearm. “Rrright?”
Larry managed a confirmation, eyes watering in pain.
“Marvellous,” beamed the Mayor. “You’ll love it there. Everyone loves the Singing Forest. This way please.”
Suki’s good humour seemed magically restored. She withdrew her painful grip on his arm and slipped a large, furry paw around his shoulders instead.
Larry walked at her side, reflecting that he hadn’t dated anyone so tall since the agency had matched him up with Svetlana, the Czechoslovakian tightrope-walker. A great looker, and her fetish for danger had started off rather exciting. At the end, though, she had set him up to be caught with her, in flagrante delicto, by a man who had claimed to be her fiancé. Ten minutes of being dangled naked by the ankles from a fourth storey window had proved too much ‘excitement’ for Larry. He had quit while he was still ahead. While he still had a head, anyway.
Now he found himself looking back on Svetlana with fond nostalgia. Asked to choose between that date and this, he had no doubts about his answer.
“Czeck, please!”
That said, there was something tantalizing about the way Suki’s hip was moving against his as she sauntered along by his side. She certainly was beautiful. So was an avalanche, when viewed from a distance. It was only when you were standing in its path that you failed to appreciate its true wonder.
Talking of paths, they were headed on a yellow-tinted lane, straight towards the lilac treeline. Larry couldn’t help but wonder what he was going to do for a whole afternoon, surrounded by nothing but trees and Suki.
No doubt she would think of something. That was what worried him.
The little path finally wound its way to the edge of the forest.
“Well, we’re here,” said the Mayor, unnecessarily. “Enjoy your afternoon, we’ll be waiting at the other edge of the forest for you. Keep the paths in sight. We wouldn’t want you to get lost.”
“Fat chance,” muttered Larry, glancing at the bobbing cameras that surrounded them.
Suki merely looked at him with gleaming eyes.
“Let’s go,” she said with avarice in her voice.
Larry was herded into the forest at a brisk trot. He looked around.
It was easy to see, at first glance, why the Singing Forest had become so popular with tourists. A sweet scent of blossom filled the air, and white flowers paved the forest floor, like confetti. Bark and leaf were pale lilac, soothing on the eyes and calming to the soul. The sun’s warm red light dappled the fairytale scene, flickering like a fireside flame against the tree trunks and the bushes alike. Little creatures watched them from the distance, well away from the path. Birds nested in the budding branches. It was as peaceful, as tranquil as a place of worship.
“Perrrfect,” murmured Suki. Larry’s face lit up in a smile of agreement.
A moment later, the atmosphere was shattered.
“Squirrrrels!” the cat yowled, springing from the path to chase after the little tree-dwellers. She was disconcertingly fast, breaking through the undergrowth as if it were nothing more than cobwebs. The forest-dwellers broke ranks as the cat hurtled towards them. Bunnies headed for their holes, birds flew shrieking into the air and the squirrels ran up the lilac treetrunks, heading for the thin branches near the sky-line.
Larry stared after her, aghast. So much for staying on the path – and so much for the Singing Forest. In a few more moments, it was going to be the Screaming Forest – or at least certain of its denizens were!
He watched as Suki launched herself up into one of the trees. Her claws dug into the bark and she scaled its heights as nimbly as any backyard moggie. Wherever the squirrel leapt, she pursued. Her green fur stood out in stark contrast to the ethereal shades of the forest and, from what Larry could see, her face was lit up in predatory ecstasy. Little by little, she gained on the little rodent as it dodged and weaved between branches and behind leaves. Finally, with a screaming snarl, Suki wrapped a paw around her struggling prey and squeezed it until its eyes bulged.
Obviously delighted with her new prize, she dropped lightly to the ground and sauntered towards Larry. He watched her approach, feeling stirrings of sympathy for the helpless animal in the cat’s grip. Much more unsettling were the stirrings of arousal in him as he watched Suki’s swaggering approach. Her thick white mane billowed out behind her. Her tail swayed in opposing rhythm to her hips. Her eyes were alight with the fire of the chase. She had been right – the forest did make her seem more alive!
He could barely take his eyes off her – until he noticed that one of their following cameras was zooming in for a close-up of his shorts. In a creditable imitation of Suki’s restaurant scene, he slammed it away with his fist.
It resumed its tracking of his face. Even so, the moment was broken. Now that Suki was near, he felt only revulsion as she sunk her teeth into squirrel neck, and chewed and cracked her way into its skull.
“Want some?” she asked, holding out the remainder of the corpse to him. Larry closed his eyes, his face scrunched up in disgust. Blood was still spurting from the hole where the squirrel’s head should be.
“We should…” He held back a retch and tried again. “We should keep to the path. They said so.”
A single claw ran through Larry’s brown-ginger hair.
“Perrrhaps,” she said, licking a speck of squirrel-brain from her whiskers. “Perrrhaps not. They only advised us to keep the path in ourrr sights. Besides, my sense of dirrrection is nearrr perrrfect. We can go anywherrre we like. As deep as we like.”
Her words sent fresh shivers through him. Again, Larry felt himself rising to the occasion. What was wrong with him? Surely he wasn’t so tired of life that he could actually consider getting… closer… to a talking lioness? He couldn’t actually be thinking of… right here in the forest… with all those cameras…
Whoa Nelly! Time to get through this forest, as quickly as possible!
“The path,” he managed in a strangled voice. Then he turned, not waiting for her to disagree, and strode quickly along the white-blossomed lane.
“You know yourrr prrroblem?” purred a silky voice as a paw landed on his shoulder again. “You pay too much attention to the rrrules.”
“Oh, go chase a squirrel!” he snapped, far too tense in more ways than one.
Suki’s smiled crookedly. “If you insist, loverrr.”
In a single gesture, she crammed the remains of the first poor beast into her mouth and detached herself from Larry. Then she was off, bounding through the glades and dells, searching for her next kill.
Larry tried to care and found that he couldn’t. Anything that kept her away from him was good news right now. He was so busy trying to keep Suki in sight that he almost missed the first notice-board.
It was made of the familiar lilac-wood. Set a little back from the path, it stood on a plinth at the height of his shoulder. Four feet wide and three high, it seemed to be full of gibberish heiroglyphs and pictures of trees. As he stared at it, though, the symbols rearranged themselves into well-patterned English, as if by magic.
Mouth hanging open in surprise, Larry read the contents of the message:
Welcome, weary traveller, to the Singing Forests. This area has been declared a Zone of Industrial and Residential Restriction since the Great Tree Revolt of BIA3112. Visitors are reminded: No axes, no matches, no flammable substances, no singing, no mechanical music-making devices of any kind and no littering. Furthermore, visitors will refrain from making prejudicial remarks to trees based on height, colour or leaf-formation.
Thank you for your attention. Enjoy the Singing Forests of D’oz.
Larry rubbed at his eyes. It didn’t help. The message remained the same.
The great tree revolt? What was that supposed to mean? Were the trees supposed to be alive, then? Well, of course, all trees were alive… but… surely they couldn’t be serious? What could the trees do if you insulted their (he blinked and re-read the section) leaf-formations, anyway?
He shook his head slowly before walking on. Better not to tell Suki about the trees. She was just the type to try insulting one, for no other reason than to satisfy her curiosity.
Those squirrels were certainly keeping her busy, anyway. She was happily ignoring the plethora of wildlife inhabiting the rest of the forest. Apparently, if it didn’t have a bushy tail and a store of nuts for the winter, it wasn’t worth chasing. From time to time, Larry saw Suki dashing across the path, pursuing one of the ill-fated rodents. She was an emerald streak of energy in the otherwise tranquil landscape.
Larry wished he could get rid of his own energy so easily. He was buzzing with inner tension. Maybe it was simple fear of the unknown. Maybe it was delayed reaction to the series of shocks he had endured in the last twenty-four hours. Maybe it was frustration in not being able to get Xandara’s number, or maybe it was because of his ambivalence about Suki.
He couldn’t figure any of it out. For the first time since this nightmare had started, he was more or less in control. He had a chance to think – to get his head straight – and all he could think about dark amber cat-eyes and perfect knees!
The next notice-board came into view. After the last one, he wasn’t sure he wanted to look. Finally, deciding that what you didn’t know could very well maim you horribly, he ran his eyes over the strange hieroglyphs again.
The words re-formed magically, just as they had done before. This time the writing was much smaller and more than a dozen small pictures littered the message-space. The title read: ‘The Fauna of D’oz, Part I’. Larry started reading the first paragraph when his eye was drawn towards one portrait in particular.
It was a miniature representation of a squirrel. It looked exactly like the ones that Suki was hunting in the forest, not like the deformed specimens at the café. Larry shuddered and wondered, not for the first time, what diabolical machinations lay behind the chocolate-box façade of this world. On the other hand, he was probably better off not knowing…
He skimmed down to the paragraph about the squirrels and began to read:
The Yomyom squirrel was first imported into D’oz more than fifty standard years ago. Since that time it has flourished, especially in the more wooded and mountainous regions of the planet. A typical female Yomyom has between twenty and thirty young in a single mating cycle. If it were not for their unique flavour, they would long ago have been classified a Planetary Pest (class II). As it is, they are a vital part of the D’oz economy. Yomyom hunting, Yomyom harvesting, Yomyom cuisine and Yomyom exports have become extremely lucrative in recent years. Visit the Café Rejectus and try one. Only then will you understand the motto: “Yomyoms. One is never enough.”
(Warning: the Yomyom squirrel can be highly addictive to some species. Please consult your physician if you begin to experience obsessive behaviour, hallucinations, withdrawal symptoms, paranoia or psychotic behaviour)
Larry squinted to read the small-print. Incredibly, he felt a reluctant grin forming. He had expected a singing forest and got nothing more than an expanse of trees. He had expected a date and ended up on a squirrel hunt. For once, it seemed like Suki had got the raw end of the deal, and not him. Or should that be the raw end of the squirrel?
He laughed aloud. Since he had arrived on the show, he had tried to do everything they had asked of him. Answer the questions. Pick a date. Pick an envelope. Stick to the path. What was the point? They were going to get him in the end, one way or another.
Feeling more alive than he had in years, he began to sprint after an emerald-furred goddess of the forest. Time to go hunt some squirrels!
At the bottom of the page, left unread, was a picture of a bright yellow gooselike creature. The paragraph beside it read:
The Blachart. Extremely evil-minded and territorial, this bird is a menace to the unwary traveller of D’oz. It treats anything within its space as a potential foe or a potential mate. This includes trees, all species of animal smaller than a bear, people and, in one documented case, an electric fence. Despite the Blachart’s unpleasant disposition, it is the galaxy’s most highly-sexed creature. Its exploits are legendary, and its eggs are highly sought after, being one of the best-known aphrodisiacs ever discovered.
The D’oz corporation takes no responsibility for the consequences of any encounters with Blacharts or their eggs. They are not liable for compensation on issues including: loss of limbs, loss of clothing, loss of sanity, loss of spousal privileges or loss of dignity. You have been warned!
--------
Larry laughed and shouted. He hurdled roots and scattered leaves as he ran. There was a fire blazing inside him; an energy that would not be tamed. He wanted to whoop and leap and chase and be chased. He wanted to lie down on the forest floor, cover himself with the white blossoms and write drunken poetry. He wanted to hit something and kiss something, preferably at the same time.
His thoughts writhed between white mane and blonde hair as he lingered on the notion of what he really wanted. His heart pounded and sweat dripped from him, unheeded in the thrilling buzz of the moment.
As Suki pounced from one tree branch to the next, Larry paced her on the forest floor. The path was forgotten, the air was ripe with adrenaline and hormones. When the lioness finally caught her prey, she brought it to Larry, half-smiling, half-snarling. He ripped it, still squealing, from her long claws. Then he grabbed a handful of mane and pulled her into a savage kiss, tasting cat-heat and squirrel blood on her tongue and teeth.
It all went downhill from there…
--------
Wow!
Ow!
Larry lay on the forest floor, his body a yammering mass of pain. He had puncture marks he couldn’t even remember getting! There were scratches and bites and blood… and not all of it was his. His clothes were either shredded or strewn around the forest clearing, hanging from a variety of shrubs and branches. Every muscle ached. Even his eardrums ached – but that was probably due more to the combined screaming and caterwauling that they had been forced to endure.
He wondered how long he and Suki had… been at it? All time sense had disappeared into a deep red haze of lust and pain. And pleasure. Mustn’t forget pleasure. He watched the cat as she casually licked blood from her claws. All he could say was: if she was prudish for one of her race, then a normal feline would probably have killed him!
But what a way to go…
He groaned as he looked up at the fast darkening sky above. Their entire afternoon was gone and it was swiftly turning into evening. Any time now, they would be expected to emerge from the Forest and on to – well, who knew what?
No help for it. He was going to have to move. His body moaned a thousand protests at him as he rose from the bed of white blossom and started looking around for his clothes.
Suki watched him through slanted eyes. “What – finished alrrready?” she purred.
Larry ignored her, choosing to believe that she was joking. She’d better be, anyway! He hobbled over to where one of his horrible sandals hung from a lilac branch. Ignoring the creaks and protests from his aching body, he retrieved it and put it on. Then he looked around for the rest. The shirt was a write-off. What was left of it hung in tatters over his chest and arms, still displaying shreds of its original cheery Hawaiian pattern. His trousers should be around here somewhere, though. He began to turn in a circle, searching for anything that looked even vaguely like clothes.
“I think they’re over here,” ventured a silvery voice. Larry whirled around to locate the new speaker.
All his newfound sense of wellbeing vanished in one withering instant. Standing at the far edge of the clearing, looking slightly apologetic, was Xandara. She of the brilliant blonde hair and the perfect knees. He let out a little ‘urk!’ of terror as she held up a pair of trousers in her exquisitely manicured hands.
“What arrre you doing here?” Suki asked with narrowed eyes.
Xandara gave an apologetic half-smile. “You were running late. I was sent to bring you back to the Mayor, before you head home.”
Larry inched towards Xandara, both hands protecting his modesty as best he could. It occurred to him to wonder how long the girl had been standing there, and his face flamed at the thought. At arm’s length, he reached out and grabbed the trousers, then executed a comical little dance as he tried to put them on without revealing any more of his body than was absolutely necessary.
Suki dressed much more languorously, watching Xandara in a sidelong manner, as if in challenge. The blonde waited, seeming equally oblivious to Larry’s discomfort and Suki’s rivalry.
“Shall we go?” she asked brightly, once the two of them were dressed again.
They walked back to the path in silence. Xandara walked on one side of Larry, Suki on the other. He hobbled between them, trying to run an internal inventory of his aches and pains. They were extensive enough to demand a recount – and he couldn’t have found it in him to regret a single one of them.
What a date! And it wasn’t even over yet!
He risked a sidelong glance at Xandara. She always seemed to show up at the most inopportune moments. He was beginning to wonder why.
As if echoing his thoughts, Suki spoke up.
“Why, everrry time that we turrrn arrround, do we bump into you, human?”
“Me?” Xandara’s laugh rippled sweetly. “Well, I work for the show. I go where I’m needed, and today I was needed to run errands here.”
“Ahhh.” For some reason, that answer seemed to satisfy Suki. She gave up her death-grip on Larry’s arm and walked by his side. As they made their way along the forest path she scanned the trees occasionally, with a hunter’s eyes.
Larry took advantage of the temporary truce and asked a question of his own.
“Are you from Earth?”
She smiled, and something within him melted like warm putty.
“Oh no. I did date an Earthman once, though. I picked him, my first time on the show. He was nice, but in the end it didn’t work out.”
“It didn’t?”
She shook her pretty head. “He broke it off. Said we were from two different worlds. I suppose he was right. So – have you enjoyed your date so far?”
Larry tried not to look too abashed as he nodded. Then he noticed something. There were no floating orbs circling them.
“Where are the cameras, anyway?” he asked.
“They’re gone,” she answered with a shy smile. “There’s already enough… ahhh… footage of you to make a great show. The producers decided they couldn’t top that if they watched you two for another century!”
Larry felt hot all over. Sixty-three trillion people. All… watching… while…
He could just picture the gleam in Ms. Padd’s eyes as she muttered about the ratings.
He rapidly changed the subject.
“Why is it called the Singing Forest?” he demanded. “I haven’t heard a single song! And what’s with all the warnings about sentient trees?”
Xandara had such a pleasant laugh. She used it now.
“This is a tourist destination, Mr. Cludge. You can’t expect the marketers to be completely honest in their presentation. It’s called the Singing Forest because of the incident between the sentient trees and the All-Banshees Annual Choir Outing, nearly two hundred years ago. It takes a lot to rouse the trees into action, but apparently that did it. The residents of D’oz were picking bits of banshee out of the landscape for months after that little skirmish. Shortly after that, the ‘no singing’ rule came into force. It’s hardly a story to rouse the tourists, though, so they carry on telling people that the trees sing.”
Larry was fascinated (by the girl and the story). “But surely people would find out what a fake it is?”
Suki was obviously bored by the conversation. She chose this moment to go dashing off after yet another squirrel. ‘Insatiable’, thought Larry, with just a touch of admiration – and another of trepidation.
Xandara watched her go, then linked arms with him. It was a purely companionable gesture, yet he noticed she had not touched him while Suki was around.
She answered before he could puzzle this out.
“Tourists never notice things like that. Besides, almost every foodstuff you can eat from this place is mind-altering in some way. As long as people eat before they walk, they’ll see synchro-dancing wombats, toadstools with smoking chimneys, trees that sing perfect four-part harmonies and pretty much anything else you plant in their imaginations. This place is legendary, Mr. Cludge.”
Larry walked along, uncommonly happy. Even when Suki rejoined them, he couldn’t shake the smile from his face. Here he was, with two beautiful women. Well, females, anyway. The date was nearly over and he was still alive. For the first time since the day had begun, he found himself hoping that this was not just a bizarre dream.
Maybe there was a ‘right girl’ for him, in this galaxy. Who knew – maybe there were two!
The light was almost gone when the three of them emerged from the forest. It seemed that they had come full circle, back to the original landing site. This time, as well as their little landing shuttle, there was a much bigger spaceship, hovering slightly above the ground. Larry recognised the horde of freaks standing in front of it, as the film crew from the show. They even had their diabolical raft of bobbing cameras.
The Mayor and his bizarre cohorts were waiting in the centre of the clearing. Plastic smiles were at the ready.
“Ah. Well. Mr. Cludge and Miss Marrauwl. We’re running a little late now. The leaving ceremony will have to be bypassed. I do hope you’ve enjoyed your stay on D’oz. I know we’ve all enjoyed having you.”
Larry flushed as the dwarf leered at him.
“Now,” continued the Mayor, oblivious, “You get to choose. Will you return on the shuttle, together and alone. Or will you both take separate routes back home?”
“I’m forrr the shuttle,” murmured Suki, sauntering towards the smaller ship with graceful ease.
Xandara said nothing, but left Larry’s side to join the stage crew in front of the larger ship.
Larry paused, undecided. Xandara on the big ship, Suki on the small. Knees… or hot squirrel-breath. That was what it all came down to, in the end…
Last edited by Shady Stoat on Sat Feb 11, 2006 8:12 am; edited 2 times in total
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Ingrothechundyer
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| Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 9:58 am Post subject: |
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| Nice chapter!
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Smee
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| Posted: Thu Dec 01, 2005 5:23 am Post subject: |
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Great chapter.
I spotted this:
| Quote: | | show up at the most importune moments |
- at first I didn't recognise it as a word, but looking it up I find it is. However the word I thought you meant, inopportune, I think works better in this case.
I've got to say go with Suki. The knees might be perfect, and she seems nice but she could have some horrible aspect that you don't know about.
Better the cat you know.
Happy Writing.
_________________
The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
Last edited by Smee on Thu Dec 01, 2005 9:47 am; edited 1 time in total
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Thu Dec 01, 2005 5:44 am Post subject: |
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[quote="Smee"]Great chapter.
| Quote: | | show up at the most importune moments |
- at first I didn't recognise it as a word, but looking it up I find it is. However the word I thought you meant, inopportune, I think works better in this case.
Thanks Smee. You're right, my fingers flew away with the wrong word (although 'hobbled away' might be more appropriate in this case - I was working through a bad case of non-inspiration with this chapter).
Anyway, fixed and sorted. Much gratitude 
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Shady Stoat
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| Posted: Thu Dec 01, 2005 5:49 am Post subject: |
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| Smee wrote: | Great chapter.
| Quote: | | show up at the most importune moments |
- at first I didn't recognise it as a word, but looking it up I find it is. However the word I thought you meant, inopportune, I think works better in this case. |
Thanks Smee. You're right, my fingers flew away with the wrong word (although 'hobbled away' might be more appropriate in this case - I was working through a bad case of non-inspiration with this chapter).
Anyway, fixed and sorted. Much gratitude
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ethereal_fauna
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| Posted: Thu Dec 01, 2005 6:08 am Post subject: |
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Heck, go for broke and try to get Suki and Xandara both. You only have an opportunity like this once in a lifetime. Think quickly and come up with some sort of plausible suggestion...hmmm, I can't think of one just yet (at least not one that I should post here).
_________________
The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
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