 |
 |
 |
 |
|
| Author |
Message |
Chinaren
Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Topics: 340
Posts: 8879
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
 Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 7:56 am Post subject: Rise of Shadows chapter 7 - Enemy Within. |
 |
|
Chapter 7 – Enemy Within.
{removed}
_________________
Neil Hartley Books.
My Amazon page.
Last edited by Chinaren on Mon Jul 19, 2010 6:08 am; edited 2 times in total
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
 |
|
 |
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
DELETED
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 12:54 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| DELETED
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Chinaren
Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Topics: 340
Posts: 8879
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 4:57 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| Zephyr wrote: | | Hmm… well, we could bend over and kiss our butts goodbye… seems a little omnipressive to me, but well, start by killing the commander and taking command of the ship! Then nuke the planet, then destroy the dragnet, then clear the ship of all infected then… |
LOL! The trouble is, if they kill the Director, the Corp. crew aren't going to believe them!
Good line though, I think I'll use it in the next chapter. 
_________________
Neil Hartley Books.
My Amazon page.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Mephistopheles
Respected Citizen
Joined: 24 May 2007
Topics: 16
Posts: 612
Location: Not where I want to be.
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 4:59 pm Post subject: |
|
|
hmm, finally another chappy, and we sit in a hopeless situation at the end of it. well, there has to be something that can be implemented as a weapon. maybe a pen? or a glass or something? so long as the commander is the only one, and he shows his infection by killing at least one crew member, he should be able to take control of the ship, or at least have Vanessa on his side. After that though? i have to agree with Zeph. Kill the planet, the dragnet, the drones, and then self destruct he ship that they are on, after transmitting an emergency signal, of course, that warns the galaxy of infected humes and the ability of psychics to pick 'em out. Will think on this a bit further.
_________________
Cause I am, whatever you say I am
If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?
I don't know, it's just the way I am.
eminem
without the threat of death,
there is no reason to live at all
marilyn manson
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Chinaren
Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Topics: 340
Posts: 8879
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 5:11 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Ah! Provoke a fight you mean and make the Director use his strange powers? (before killing him of course). Not a bad idea there...
_________________
Neil Hartley Books.
My Amazon page.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
algu95
Citizen
Joined: 04 Mar 2007
Topics: 0
Posts: 265
Location: Trudging around in Allwhere
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 12:25 am Post subject: |
|
|
Hmmm-hm-hmmmmmmmmm...
Not a bad chappy here China... But no idea for a DP at this point.
_________________
Yes, no, what, hello?
Falcon Lord, a linear story by algu!
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
D-Lotus
Venerable IFian
Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Topics: 103
Posts: 4123
Location: Hollywood, USA
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 1:56 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I'm kinda dissapointed that Cole became infected. I envisioned a story in which the two differing parties had to unite in order to defeat the common enemy. Oh well.
If Cole is infected, then we know that he probably lied about closing off the breach and rounding up the infected. Which means that the entire corporate ship will become controlled by the infected at some point.
At this point, Max is nearly powerless. There's almost nothing he can do to stop the rise of the shadows. At least he can save his own life, though. I agree that picking a fight and somehow exposing the commander is a good idea, but Max has no weapons in hand, and it might be difficult to make Cole fall into a rage.
Maybe the psychic has some sort of power that can make Cole's head blow up? Dunno. Maybe the psychic can use her powers to steal a gun away from someone and then shoot Cole.
| Quote: | | “And now I assume I’m going to go out of the nearest airlock,” said Ben, eyes narrowing. |
btw, who is Ben?
_________________
 Chapter 5: The Rendezvous 
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
LordoftheNight
Revered IFian
Joined: 11 Aug 2005
Topics: 41
Posts: 5276
Location: Hell
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 4:52 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I can't really remember - and am too lazy to go back - what we know about the Infected.
Could you give us (or maybe just me) a quick recap on how they differ from uninfected humans?
_________________
Punishment leads to Fear. Fear leads to Obedience. Obedience leads to Freedom. Therefore, Punishment leads to Freedom.
Ave Dominus Nox
A Fronte Praecipitium a Tergo Lupi
Blood Bowl
Scraping the Barrel
A Tale of Four Swords
Passion
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Chinaren
Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Topics: 340
Posts: 8879
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 5:13 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| D-Lotus wrote: | | I'm kinda dissapointed that Cole became infected. I envisioned a story in which the two differing parties had to unite in order to defeat the common enemy. Oh well. |
Strangely enough D, that's exactly what I had in mind when I started this. And who knows? Maybe it will still happen. I admit, this twist if something I thought of at the last moment. I thought it would add a little more intruige* into the tale. 
| D-Lotus wrote: |
| Quote: | | “And now I assume I’m going to go out of the nearest airlock,” said Ben, eyes narrowing. |
btw, who is Ben? |
Ooops! Sorry, I've been going over one of my older SGames and editing it, and must have become confused! (Sector 507: Captain Ben Granger).
*I just can't spell that.
_________________
Neil Hartley Books.
My Amazon page.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
algu95
Citizen
Joined: 04 Mar 2007
Topics: 0
Posts: 265
Location: Trudging around in Allwhere
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 5:15 am Post subject: |
|
|
| lordofthenight wrote: | I can't really remember - and am too lazy to go back - what we know about the Infected.
Could you give us (or maybe just me) a quick recap on how they differ from uninfected humans? |
Well, Lordy, it is quite obvious.
First, the most obvious. They have super strength, stamina, speed, agility, resilience and other Superman-like abilities.
Second, they are kinda 'possesed', though I believe Chinaren used a different word somewhere...
Third, they give off a 'black-hole aura' that physcics* can detect, which seperates them from other humans.
There are probably more differences, but if so, I can't remember them...
*Can't bloody spell that...
_________________
Yes, no, what, hello?
Falcon Lord, a linear story by algu!
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Lebrenth
Honored Citizen
Joined: 29 Dec 2005
Topics: 43
Posts: 1483
Location: Utah
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 10:35 am Post subject: |
|
|
Intrigue. Psychics. That's how they're spelled.
Other attributes of the possessed are: Fourth, they can freeze or possess with a mere touch. Fifth, they crave warmth. Sixth, they are an ancient race awakening from very deep hibernation. Seventh, they can communicate in "whispers", which may be telepathy or maybe a manifestation of their ethereal nature, i.e.: | Quote: | At the same time he thought he heard something, almost like someone whispering, very, very gently in his ear.
“We will Rise!” |
Perhaps we can use heat signatures to detect them. If they freeze people, perhaps the temperature of the possessed is perceiveably lower. If we can get the doctors or scientists to find a way to detect possession, we can insist on scanning or examining all of the senior staff. When Cole evades, it will bring suspicion and we'll force him to expose himself as possessed. That he retains his knowledge and personality while being possessed is unnerving. I wonder if he even knows he's possessed.
But we must also consider, we don't know that he's possessed. In fact, it might even be the psychic who is possessed and is now trying to trick us into killing Cole. She's been far more exposed to the possessed than Cole has. We should suspect her. Another reason to find another way to detect the possessed.
I don't imagine the characters would be thinking this way, but WE should consider a spiritual source of the menace. That is, the possession is like ghosts possessing the living, so perhaps there is a source of their power that can be attacked. If they are ghosts, we could find their bodies and try destroying them. I believe we know where the outbreak originated, and it seems within our means to investigate safely (if we can just get a ship without possessed on it!).
Considering how quickly the Dragnet was taken over, we really don't stand a chance on the Samantha. We need a brand spanking new ship, preferably small with a FTL drive.
But here's a mystery, if it's so easy for the possessed to spread, why hasn't Cole just run around the table tagging everyone? Or just tag the security guards and have them blast the whole senior staff right there? Is there some sort of limitation to their ability to possess? And what about their incredible hunger for heat? Why hasn't Cole been freezing people? Questions for Max Blue to keep an eye for, I guess.
_________________
Welcome To Purgatory - current storygame
Please visit my Library of completed works.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
DELETED
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 3:37 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| DELETED
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Chinaren
Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Topics: 340
Posts: 8879
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 10:48 pm Post subject: |
|
|
That's a great post Lebby! So much so, I'm going to sponsor a Chinaren Hall 'Great comment' award! (Which is now in your honors and will soon be up in the Hall of Heroes).
_________________
Neil Hartley Books.
My Amazon page.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Smee
Revered IFian
Joined: 16 Oct 2004
Topics: 166
Posts: 5215
Location: UK
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2007 3:58 am Post subject: |
|
|
Yes, I'm very wary of assuming the Psychic is correct. At first she thought it was some kind of mental shielding she spotted on that first person. If this is technology the Corporation have developed, then it's almost certain Cole would have it too. The Corporation seem to be technologically advanced in a number of areas, including large disdain for Fleet's current bio technology, security systems, drones, coffee etc. Psychic shielding isn't a great leap of faith.
I like Lebby's idea of looking for a more scientific way of detecting them - the heat sensors. It might even be possible to do this via internal sensors, as this ship seems fairly advanced. Cole said the outbreak was watched - by camera's I assume - to ensure they knew all the momevments and had locked down the whole area.
I think Max wants some answers, and also some excuse to get away from the ship. I think he should suggest and volunteer for an 'away mission' to the surface. Investigate, and see if he can find the source of the outbreak. I'm sure Cole can equip him with some decent weaponry.
Good writing Chin.
_________________
The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Lebrenth
Honored Citizen
Joined: 29 Dec 2005
Topics: 43
Posts: 1483
Location: Utah
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Chinaren
Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Topics: 340
Posts: 8879
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2007 3:41 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I would still have given you it Lebs, and I thoroughly enjoyed your CfH review too!
_________________
Neil Hartley Books.
My Amazon page.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
techeddreamer
Guest
Items
|
| Posted: Mon Nov 05, 2007 12:42 am Post subject: |
|
|
this my furst try at this kind of action to get to play ? 
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Chinaren
Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Topics: 340
Posts: 8879
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Chinaren
Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Topics: 340
Posts: 8879
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 11:50 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Thank-you for some excellent comments and ideas here people. The poll is now up, detect the infected of voting.
_________________
Neil Hartley Books.
My Amazon page.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Chinaren
Hallowed IFian
Joined: 05 Sep 2005
Topics: 340
Posts: 8879
Location: https://www.NeilHartleyBooks.com
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 6:02 pm Post subject: |
|
|
~Sigh~ 4 votes seems to be my lot lately. Anyway, I've started the next chapter (not sure when I'll have chance to actually finish it mind) so the poll is closed.
Thanks for reading, and I hope the next installment will be out soon, if RL gives me half an hour break.
_________________
Neil Hartley Books.
My Amazon page.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Author |
Message |
Mephistopheles
Respected Citizen
Joined: 24 May 2007
Topics: 16
Posts: 612
Location: Not where I want to be.
Items
Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
| Posted: Sat Nov 17, 2007 4:57 pm Post subject: |
|
|
sorry for missing your poll china. try to not to let it happen again.
_________________
Cause I am, whatever you say I am
If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?
I don't know, it's just the way I am.
eminem
without the threat of death,
there is no reason to live at all
marilyn manson
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
