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Trailing Turquoise SG (Updated Version In Linear Lane Soon)
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 11:55 pm    Post subject: Trailing Turquoise SG (Updated Version In Linear Lane Soon) Reply with quote

Chapter One



It was the rain that woke her.


She came to lying on moist wood, the sounds of the ocean drifting into her consciousness first. Slowly, as she adjusted to the individual feeling of her limbs, she sat up. She had been laying face down on what looked like a pier, crammed haphazardly between two buildings. Glancing around, she realized something terrifying. She was alone.


The knock at the door woke her with a start, and Elona sat up, shaking her head. The memories always seemed to seep in when she slept. Pushing to her feet with a sigh, Elona walked across the less than clean wooden floor of her inn room. Unlocking it, she opened the door to see the inn maid beaming up at her with a jug of water. Inviting steam curled up from it’s surface, and Elona stepped aside. She watched as the woman, still young enough to be fresh faced despite her rough job, pushed aside the aged folding screen that blocked the equally worn copper tub and poured the jug water carefully into it. Another inn worker, this one a man strong enough to carry two more pitchers, followed her in, poured the rest in, before leaving and returning with a final decanter of heated water. The inn maid took it, and with a plainly practiced smile, shifted her bland gaze to Elona.

“Well, miss, I’m just going to leave this here to keep warm til you rinse.”

Setting the last of the hot water next to the small stove used to heat the room she had rented, the inn maid led the worker out, and Elona shut the door behind them, locking it firmly. She had indulged and spent some of her very rare coin to purchase a bath, but when she’d arrived in her room she’d been too tired to wait up for it. Staring blankly into the water, Elona reached out and softly trailed her fingertips over the surface. A familiar tingling spread from the places where the water made contact with her skin, and Elona heaved a sigh.

“I don’t know why I ever expect anything else.” She murmured to herself, beginning to undress.

She placed the cloak, a deep green to blend into the forest that was her domain, within reach of the tub, before removing her outer tunic. Following it was her outer corset, and then the long sleeved shift she wore. Resting all of them on the bed next to her discarded weapons, she sat down to tug off her knee high boots. Elona took a moment to glance around, listening for anyone who might be heading towards her room, before reaching out and shifting the screen back to shield her from the door and window once she was seated. Satisfied that she was safe, Elona removed her breeches and underthings, before slowly sliding into the water. .

With every soft wave of the water crawling over her skin, it began to change. The supple, white flesh began to morph, and Elona watched, unable to take her eyes away no matter how many times she had seen it happen, as scales began to grow along her legs up to her waist. They were vivid in color, a deep blue green reminiscent of the sea swimming with algae, with an iridescent green sheen. Elona’s heart ached as she stared at them, reminded with every movement of the water that she was not, nor would she ever be, accepted amongst the humans. Not if they ever saw her this way, coated in scales like some sort of monster. For all she knew, that may very well be what she was.

Sighing and pushing those thoughts from her mind, Elona picked up the cloth provided, and began to carefully wash the grime of the forest off of herself. With each swipe of the wet cloth, more scales appeared. It took great concentration not to shred it, while they weren’t sharp, their shape did lead into a rounded point that could easily destroy the weak, well-used cloth of the inn. Despite the wariness of the dangers if she got caught, Elona relaxed into the warm water. She stretched out as much as the small tub allowed, delighting in the feeling. Even though she knew she should continue on to washing her hair, Elona found herself closing her eyes. Just a moment, just a moment to relax and just be. Just one moment.

The softest of footsteps alerted her to the presence of another. Her eyes snapped open, but the room was dark. Realizing the lantern must have burned down, Elona shifted a leg silently in the water, checking its temperature. Warm. No, the lantern had been unlit. All alarms ringing in her head now, Elona listened. Was there going to be another footstep? Had there even been a footstep, or was she imagining- no, no that was definitely the quiet hush of someone stepping softly. Shifting as slowly as she could so as not to make a noise, Elona struggled to listen for something else.

Rather than the soft footsteps she was expecting, she heard loud, thumping footsteps out in the hall. There was a chorus of outraged voices, and for a moment, Elona thought they had figured her out. The window had been firmly covered, she’d never unlocked it or opened the curtains, so how had they found her out? As she heard the scuffle of someone darting away from the door, Elona realized that whoever they were looking for was hiding in her room. Worse yet, without the light, she couldn’t remember where she had put her cloak.

She was stuck, half submerged in water, half scaled over, and completely naked, and there was some sort of runaway vagabond hiding in her room, putting both of them in danger. Lovely. Running her hands through her hair as silently as she could manage, Elona frantically fought for clear thought. What was she supposed to do? Who was even in her room with her?



~~*~~~*~~~*~~


So, not the longest chapter to start with, but I promise they'll get longer. The DP should be fairly obvious: What does Elona do?

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 10:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow, that's quite a sticky situation that she's in. My initial reaction was to stay inside and stay quiet, and probably hide behind the door or something so you can ambush anyone who walks into the room. We should be safe, considering that the room is locked, but the house has been broken into, so there's really no telling.

However, we really don't know that it is us that the person is after. If I were just a regular robber, and I'd broken into a house, I'd probably run the hell away if I see a monster in it. It'd be incredibly dumb if we're just going to sit in silence and hide while our place is being robbed.

Either way, I'd vote for being cautious right now. We don't know what this person is after, we don't know if they're armed or not. The only thing we can be sure of is that they aren't here to make friends, else there'd be no imaginable need to break into our place. And when physical danger is imminent, it's always better to err on the safer side. So stay where you are, and if possible, try contacting authorities. If we can't do that, lay low till things seem to calm down before walking out to check.
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 11:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hm, I guess I wasn't clear enough- she's renting a room in a tavern, and the person is still in that room. I'll scan and see if I can edit anything to be a bit clearer on that. Aside from that, your suggestion is definitely noted!
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 11:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Huh. Okay, that means that the person is probably in here for us, but that doesn't change my actual suggestion. Your writing was all good, I guess I didn't read it well enough lol xP
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 11:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alright, first off I love the way you started this! The first sentence made me wonder, and that makes me read more! I'm also a sucker for descriptions, though you know that xP

Maybe she should quietly try and find the cloak? Considering it's somewhere near the tub, it wouldn't be too far from her reach and she could feel around for it, to try and dry off - it was said she wouldn't be accepted if seen in such a way. Who knows who or what that person is? Not to mention those voices and loud footsteps in the hall - people might come barging in!

Though she could also stay in the tub, as she moved the privacy screen back - therefore if anyone did barge into where she was she would be shielded from prying eyes. . . At least a little bit. She could even play the offended woman if she covers herself with the cloak - even if she is in the tub. She could throw it over where her scales are and hide under it. Though I don't know, having a cloak in a tub is kind of strange so maybe not.

That's all I have for now. ^^;;
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 12:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I believe she's just renting a room, and the person is in her room because the light wasn't on and he thought it was empty. He's just hiding?

Anyways, You know my comments from last night Smile

Still a good read btw, and I like that we get an idea of what she might be, but it's told in a way to still be vague and not outright saying it right off the bat.

You might want to go through for spelling, as I picked up a word last night but *shrug* Its just as easily ignored, I think and does't stop the flow too much. (I cant really say much on the spelling frontier anyways XD)

As for DP...I really want to know who's in the room....but my cautious side would have me just sit there quietly and wait to see what happens.
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 5:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

A solid start so far Noni. And don't worry about length. As long as your chapters are clear and make sense, no one is going to raz you about length. As for what Elona should do, haul her naked self out of that damn tub and wrap up in a towel or her cloak as quickly as possible, grabbing a weapon and search for a way to re-light her lamp. Startle whoever it is out of hiding.
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 5:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Nice to see there's some people who aren't in the 'sit in the bathtub forever' camp! And I appreciate the reassurance on the length.

Probably just gonna wait on one or two more people, and then I'll put up a poll. Can't wait to see what else you guys have up your sleeves for this one!
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 7:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ooo I like this start!

I definitely think she should go and check to see who was there. Sitting in the tub won't help. Naked or not, maybe she can grab something as a makeshift weapon?
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 7:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

(Halp, I have been lured in faster than I can introduce myself or read the rules o__o. I'll probably do it later? OP knows who I am and said I should post, at any rate.)

Anyway, I really liked the consistent wateriness of this piece (whether it's actual water like the bath, or in the language, like how her memories "seep in" while she sleeps). Also intrigued by her scales being sharp enough to potentially shred the hotel towel. The idea of a heroine that's hazardous to touch amuses me.

As for what she should do, I figure she should figure out who's in the room with her sooner rather than later. Possibly try to befriend it since she's already about as vulnerable as she can be so how much worse can it get? I kinda wonder if it's some sort of being in a similar position to her (shunned at least partly for being monstrous/nonhuman in some way), but without the money to pay for a room in a tavern. If she can do something to help it in this situation that could easily be far more dangerous for the intruder than anyone else involved, it would also then be in her debt/probably become her ally pretty quickly (though maybe reluctantly.)

Then again, maybe it's an armed intruder there specifically to kill her and she should make a dash for her weapons or hide or something. I tend to favor recklessness when I don't have enough information to feel like I can make a sound decision XD. And find it more entertaining in fiction.
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 8:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Loving the suggestions guys! Andolyn said she was gonna check it out, so as soon as we have her suggestion I'll be putting the poll up. Thanks for reading!
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 9:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LOOOOVING it! Very Happy

You know me. I'm also going to say she gets out. If she knows the general area in which she threw the cloak, she could jump that way quickly and try to grab a weapon. I'm going to venture to say that this person hasn't realized she's there, so she's got the element of surprise.

The imagery of this tale is BEAUTIFUL. I love it! Can't wait to see more!
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2015 9:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alright, awesome to hear it! I'm giving it 20 minutes for any last minute suggestions, and then throwing up a poll.
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2015 7:13 am    Post subject: Reply with quote


Voted!

The story is very intriguing and the writing is beautiful. I found that it had just the right mix of personality and imagery. :)

I voted for her to befriend the vagabond. Whoever they are, thanks to them, they're in this mess together now, and so they'll have to bail each other out!


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2015 7:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Awesome! I'm gonna be gone most of today, so you guys have just over 24 hours left to vote before I close the poll!
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2015 6:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Great start. Excited to see where this goes. I have voted and eagerly await more :3
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2015 8:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alrighty guys, in roughly 12 hours or so the poll is closing. Any last minute voters?
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 21, 2015 8:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Read this a bit late.

Love your writing, and the imagery in this story! Definitely interested to see what happens next, but meanwhile, I have voted! Very Happy
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 21, 2015 12:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I like it. Definitely curious about Elona. I've voted and am quite interested in seeing more.
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 21, 2015 2:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alrighty then guys, poll is closed!


Stay in the tub, laying low: 1 vote 8%

Haul herself out of the tub and look for a weapon: 3 votes 25 % **

Haul herself out of the tub and look for a way to light the lantern: 2 votes 16%

Try to befriend the intruder: 2 votes 16%

See who’s there, grabbing for weapons: 1 vote 8%

Try to startle the intruder: 2 votes 16%

Try to find the cloak: 1 vote 8%

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 21, 2015 10:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, I missed the pole but I probably would have chosen the same thing anyways.
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 22, 2015 1:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I am sorry to be late for the poll, but I probably would've voted to get a weapon and hustle.

Overall it's a good, vague prologue with much potential for story divergence. I like it muchly. There are a few sentences and spelling quirks I would've written differently, but now my mind is too tired to formulate a good sentence. I can say, however, that this is a very well written chapter.

Keep on rolling, stone!
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2015 1:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chapter Two


He was in so much trouble. There wasn’t any denying that, even if he hadn’t started off doing anything to deserve it. Yet, despite having done absolutely nothing wrong, when he’d heard the alarms go off, he’d jumped through the nearest window and started to hide. That’s not strictly true, Sionn reminded himself as he debated his options. You broke into the window you jumped too, which was on the… second floor? There were probably closer ones, open ones. No, you pick the one that would actually mean you were doing something wrong. And snuffing the lantern didn’t help. After the footsteps in the hall had passed, Sionn was ready to turn the dimly lit lantern back on, but as he reached for it, his ears twitched. It was soft, barely perceptible, but Sionn had heard the gentle whoosh of slow water movement. Stiffening, Sionn began to panic. You picked the occupied room. You are in soooooo much trouble.

Holding himself perfectly still, Sionn’s gaze flickered around. The room was dark, but that didn’t keep him from seeing the clothes draped on the bed. Clothing he should have noticed when he first arrived in the room, but he had been too busy trying to get off the street. His gaze landed on the most incriminating piece of clothing in there. Only able to see a vague outline, he picked it up to be sure. A corset. Oh no, Sionn. You wandered into a woman's room! While she was bathing, if that water noise and these clothes are any indication. Humans are particular about that! Closing his eyes as he beat himself up, Sionn almost didn’t notice as the water noises drifted into his ears. They twitched again, and Sionn opened his eyes. Turning his head towards the corner of the room, he squinted to make out the shape. It was so much harder in this form. A screen? There was a few rustles, and a soft clank, but Sionn didn’t get very long to process those noises before the screen he was peering intently into whooshed away, and the figure in front of him swung something in his general direction.

He dodged with ease, hopping to the side. His vision, while only affording him general silhouettes, clear enough. Realizing he was still holding the corset, Sionn dropped it like it was on fire. “I-” He started to defend himself, but had to duck another swing. What was she even swinging at him? Keeping his voice hushed as he backed away, Sionn gave another attempt. “Wait, I-” She swung again, and this time he took a risk and tried catching it. Sionn felt the sting of the blow hit his hands, and though pain shot up his arm in a scatter of sparks, he closed his hands around the- Squinting, Sionn focused on what was in his hands. Iron poker. She’d grabbed a poker from somewhere, and started swinging it at him, without even waiting for an explanation!

Sionn beamed. This chick was outstanding. Still, best not to let her see him grinning like a fool. That would make her skeptical of his explanations. Wiping the infatuated smile off his face, Sionn tightened his grip on the poker as she tried to yank it away, no doubt to make another swing for his head. Sionn realized something as she moved closer, and he could see the vague outline of her face. She smelled really, really good, but he couldn’t place it. Still, she didn’t smell like any other human he’d encountered. Maybe he really should place a little trust in her. She’s already swinging a poker at me, how much more trouble can I get into? Gathering his courage with a deep breath, Sionn tugged on the poker to keep her from regaining control of it.

“Hey!” His tone was urgent, though the volume remained hushed. “I’m not a danger, I swear. I was trying to hunker down!” The figure stilled, and Sionn felt a rush of relief. Premature, surely, but at least she hadn’t instantly written him off. “Someone started screaming thief outside, and I knew I’d get blamed and panicked. I’m sorry, the light was dim, I didn’t realize this room was occupied.”

That was about the moment Sionn remembered what this woman had been- presumably- doing when he burst into her room. Bathing. Inwardly wincing, Sionn wondered, if he looked down, just how much he’d be able to make out. Clenching his jaw, he stared with determination into the contours of her face.

“You aren’t human, are you?”

Her voice was a shock. Literal fissures of exhilaration went skittering across his skin, and Sionn gaped open mouthed at her. Her. It was her. Stamping out the rush of giddy elation, Sionn fought hard to keep his voice normal as he replied.

“No, not really.” Sionn’s tone was no longer hesitant. He didn’t know very much about her, but he knew she was kind. Far too kind to hurt him.

Sionn was right, and the poker lowered. She retained her grip on it, showing she was still wary, and Sionn felt his heart beat quicker with pride. He let go, hoping to encourage trust, and took a step back, the tail sweeping eagerly behind him the only indicator of the joy he couldn’t suppress.

“I-” Sionn started, only to be interrupted.
“I understand the need to hide, so I won’t hold… this,” The silhouette waved her free hand in an expansive gesture, “against you, but you need to leave. I’m sorry.”

Sionn stared at her for a moment, open-mouthed in confusion. Finally, with a nervous swallow, he gave a nod. Backing up again, Sionn turned towards the window. There was a certain emptiness inside him, before he realized- he knew where she was. He knew what she looked like, she can’t have changed that much. He would find her tomorrow. Sionn pushed aside the curtains, and a sliver of moonlight drifted past him into the room. He paused for a moment, overcome with the desire to turn around, to see truly her for the first time since that fated meeting, but instead, he braced his foot against the windowsill and dropped out.

He landed silently in the alleyway between the Inn and the next building over, likely a tavern, and stuck close to the wall. His ears twitched again, as he listened to see if there was still a commotion in the streets. Things had calmed down, it seemed, and he slid along the wall, backwards, until he was facing a back street. Doing his best to calmly walk out, and shortening his stride in a way he hoped made him appear he belonged, Sionn walked along the dirt road. He wondered what it would feel like against his feet, but they were trapped in the boots his humanoid feet required.

Things were so much easier as a fox.

~~*~~~*~~~*~~



Alright, this time the DP isn't so obvious. What should Sionn do to try and run into her (As we know her, Elona.)
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2015 4:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ah! I love this. I want to know more about this meeting of their's before and how he knows her but she doesn't seem to know him.

Very awesome. ^.^

As for the DP, maybe he should wait outside the inn in the morning and see if he can intercept her as she comes out? Accidentally of course. ^.^
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2015 9:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

This is fantastic! I just wanna cuddle him! hahaha!

For the DP, I'm with Zan. Let's stick close to the inn. I'll go one step further, though, and say let's have breakfast there...because, you know, they probably have decent biscuits. Wink
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2015 11:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ooo, I didn't expect that, but I like it! I'm eager to see how it came to be that Sionn knows Elona, but she doesn't have a clue who he is (well, not in his human form anyway).

For the DP...let's wait at the market. Any town worth it's salt has a marketplace, and any adventurer worth theirs will check it for supplies before heading back out. It will be easier to blend into a crowd and seem much more accidental when he bumps into her.
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2015 11:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Agreed, the obvious solution is to stalk. Very Happy

Well done, I quite like this chap and chapter. I'll be holding on the edge of my seat waiting for another. ^_^
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2015 12:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oooo, unexpected~

Still a nice read too

DP: I like the marketplace idea Smile Maybe we could even get her a small apology gift.
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 23, 2015 10:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm digging this. I really am. The attack with the firepoker amused me. I am quite curious as to their past.

As for the DP, I say, set up shop across from the inn and just wait for her to emerge. When she does, talk to her if courage allows....

and she's unarmed.
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PostPosted: Thu Sep 24, 2015 8:20 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I won't lie, it was the first weapon I thought of, and despite weighing all other options, the one that seemed the most fun. Glad you guys are enjoying it! Waiting to see if we can come up with a few more options before I put up the poll. Otherwise, it'll probably go up sometime late tomorrow.
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PostPosted: Thu Sep 24, 2015 8:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Heh. He’s impressed that she’s swinging a poker at him XD. I like waiting outside the inn better—sure, there’s going to be a marketplace, and Elona’s likely to stop there for supplies… but what if she doesn’t? A crowd would also make it easier to miss her if she did show up. Plus looking like more of an obvious stalker could lead to even funnier situations than this encounter >D. If he has money, it could be even funnier if he waits around and not only eats breakfast there, but also tries to buy Elona breakfast?
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 25, 2015 11:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Let me start with, I enjoyed this chapter! I love that we get to see more of Sionn's personality right in the beginning. Plus the flow of the chapter made me speed through it (I didn't skim anything, just fast read) and get sad when it was finished. I'm curious as to how he knows her. After all it said he recognized her scent, which means he recognizes her - so what has happened in the past that he somehow knows her? Can't wait for the next chapter to come up.

As for what he should do, now that's tricky. While I like the idea of waiting for her . . that might not be a great idea. He already ran off when he hadn't been in trouble out of fear that he'd be blamed, so what is to say that if he waits around a similar situation won't happen? And then he'd completely miss his chance. I'd say go about doing something, wandering, browsing shops for wares, eating, just something! If and when she leaves, he knows what she looks like so it shouldn't be too hard to spot her. I've always found it easier to find a familiar face in a sea of unknown ones after all.
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 25, 2015 7:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alrighty guys, looks like that's as many options as we're gonna get. I'm putting the poll up now, but since it's got so few options, I'm probably only gonna leave it up for 24 hours at the most.
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 27, 2015 8:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

So ModelP was having trouble getting his actual vote to submit, but he's broken our tie!

Wait outside the inn- 6 votes
Wander the Market- 5 votes.

Keep an eye out for that third chapter, it's on it's way!

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 04, 2015 1:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just as a heads up, with the next chapter I'm going to be trying something a little experimental. I'm going to record a reading of the chapter (done by me, be gentle), and post it alongside. Aside from just a critique on the story and options for the dp, I would also like your opinions on the recording, from if you think it's a good idea, to if you have any complaints about it. Appreciate it and hope you enjoy! It should go up sometime tomorrow.
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 04, 2015 7:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dang it...I was hoping the chapter was up. hahaha!
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 04, 2015 6:28 pm    Post subject: Chapter Three Reply with quote

((Link to audio file is on the bottom of the post))

Chapter Three


Elona hadn’t slept well, but nonetheless, when the sun rose that morning, she rose with it. Trying to forget the fact that she’d spent most of the night standing up and checking on the locked- but apparently easily unlocked- window, she gathered up her belongings. The herds would be moving, and if she dallied too long, she might miss them entirely. It was only when she was lacing her boots that Elona reflected on her odd visitor from the night before. He hadn’t seemed to mean her any harm, but had he truly only meant to use her room as a hiding place? Pulling on the laces overly hard, Elona thrust him from her mind. No matter who he had been, she had to leave, and it was better she was gone before she knew whether or not he could see in the dark what she had looked like. It was a blessing that when he’d let all that moonlight into the room, he hadn’t thought to look back.

He’d have seen far more than she’d ever allowed another, Elona considered, even aside from her scales. While reaching for her cloak, her hand had come across the poker left resting by the small stove the room sported, and Elona hadn’t thought beyond getting him out. Had she gone with more than just her instincts, she would have found her cloak as well, and only luck had kept her secret. Stop! She yelled at herself, pushing to her feet and slinging her bow over her shoulder. Spending all morning chewing over what had happened last night wouldn’t help her, and it certainly wouldn’t get her job done, or get her fed. Taking a determined breath, and moving her eyes in one last sweep over the room, Elona spun on her heel and strode towards the door. As she unlocked it, she palmed the key, quick steps taking her down the slim staircase.

The bottom floor of the modest but prosperous inn housed the connected tavern, and the check-in desk where the innkeeper currently stood. He was a plump man, the surest indication to Elona that his inn was profitable. While he seemed amiable enough, with his bright smile, the sign behind him denouncing those he didn’t allow within his inn’s walls belied his joviality. Swallowing the bile flowing in her mouth that she was reduced to interacting with him, Elona wished the forest town had possessed more than one inn. However, it did not, and she walked towards him at a determined pace, intent on paying up the remainder of her bill and being done with this place. As she handed over the key, Elona felt the prickle of someone’s gaze on her, and she flickered her eyes towards the tavern.

There was a gaggle of men, no doubt here solely for the tavern, who weren’t being shy about their prolonged stares. They were plainly trying to see underneath the hood of her cloak, but Elona merely shifted her head in a nod toward the innkeeper, obscuring her features.Their expressions had been those of drunken admiration, instead of suspicion, but Elona couldn’t afford any risks. Turning away, Elona kept her gaze on the floor as she headed for the door. Her palm was resting on it, ready to push, when another hand curled it’s eerily sausage-like fingers around her wrist. Struggling to maintain her bland expression, Elona raised her eyes to the bloodshot pair her ‘captor’ possessed. Keeping her voice icily level, Elona murmured,

“Yes?”

“It’s rude to sneak off so early, why not stick around a while?”

Relief was tempting, but Elona pushed it off. Just because it sounded more like a drunken attempt at flirting than an accusation that she wasn’t human and had bamboozled the racist innkeeper didn’t mean she wasn’t in some sort of trouble. As she remained perfectly still, debating her options, the portly drunkard began to tug her towards the bar. Gritting her teeth at his impetuous actions, Elona dug the heels of her boots into the wooden floor of the tavern. Coming to a stop, he turned and shot her a surprised look.

“I’m afraid I must be off, but I thank you for the invitation.”

A swift flick of her wrist deftly divested it of his grimy grip, and Elona swung around and pushed out into the dawn light before he could think to follow. Admittedly disturbed by the encounter, and running behind, she lengthened her stride, her feet eating up the distance between her and the town outskirts.

“Oh! Heh, I almost didn’t recognize you!”

Elona felt her heart slam to a stop in her ribs, and she found her feet coming to a halt despite herself, as she swung around. Sure enough, she was staring straight into an unfamiliar face- topped with twitching fox ears. The boy from last night. The moonlight had lit up his ears as he departed, and Elona had known exactly why he’d felt the urge to hide. He wasn’t human. Standing stock still, staring blankly at his beaming grin, Elona came to realize he was talking. To her, in fact.

“- and after all, considering how rude I accidentally was, I figured it was more than the right thing to do to track you down to apologize! Though, I guess I should apologize for just hanging around the inn until you left.”

“I- you- what?”

“I hung out outside the Inn, so I could see you again!” He sounded pleased with himself, excited even, and Elona just couldn’t wrap her mind around it.

“I thought- wasn’t it obvious that-... why?”

“Why?”

“Did you seek me out?”

There was a flicker of pain in his swirling amber eyes, and Elona felt stricken, but she shoved it aside. It was a reasonable question, considering the circumstances. In any normal world, he’d’ve tried to get as far away as possible from whoever had led that search for him last night, and yet he’d stayed close to the inn. Feeling her bow slipping off her shoulder, Elona reached to adjust it, reminded that she was losing the light.

“Nevermind, I need to head out. Apology accepted, I suppose. Just… Just don’t-”

“Can I come with you?”

Folding his hands behind his head, like he hadn’t just knocked the breath right out of her, the fox-boy gave a half-grin. Elona merely schooled her features to mask her shock. He seemed to completely lack self preservation, why on earth would he ask to accompany someone he’d never met? He couldn’t possibly even know where she was going, was he expecting her to protect him from the humans? How was she supposed to hide from him if it began to rain while she was hunting? Alarmed that the course her thoughts were going implied she was considering taking him along, Elona found herself refusing more harshly than intended.

“No, I’m going into the woods to hunt. Alone.”

~~*~~~*~~



((DP How does Sionn convince her to let him go along)

~~*~~~*~~

So I'm experimenting with doing audiobook style readings, and here's the one for this chapter
http://yourlisten.com/Novelest_Ninjagirl/trailing-turquoise-chapter-3


EDIT: new link above, no download required, should work a lot better. This is my first time doing this, so please be gentle! I hope it helps you guys read!

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 04, 2015 9:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LOVED this chapter. I really like Elona. I'm interested to learn more about her...and I still want to hug Sionn. XD

Being that I don't know much about him at this point, I'm not really sure what would be in character for him to do, but given what I've seen, he's VERY much wanting to go with her, and he'll do just about anything to stay near her.

I'm going to say let's have him begging her by telling her all the ways he can be helpful. He'd probably tag on that he'll follow her if she doesn't willingly take him. hahaha!

Loving it! Keep going!

Also, I couldn't get the audio to play. =(
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 04, 2015 10:44 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks Andi! I'm super glad you're enjoying it. Elona is turning out to be one of my favorite characters, and Sionn is so huggable, you have no idea.

I've found a site that should work for the audio, and updated the link, go ahead and give it a shot!

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 05, 2015 10:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

All right, so I've listened through your chapter, and have to say you have a husky voice in training. xD I enjoyed it thoroughly, both the story and the reading.

My idea here is that he doesn't convince her at all. He should be mortally rejected and stricken. He doesn't need to come with her, really. Or her permission to, if she doesn't see him. Ha-ha! xD

I'd say he does what a fox does. Go with the flow, get rejected and either mop or go with her anyway. He's fox-like, he'll be fine.
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 05, 2015 1:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Heya! Finally got to listening to the audio option! you've got a good voice,and I think a good grasp at dialogue too.

It's up to you what to do now, but I'd definitely actually use the audio option sometimes if you keep offering it.

I guess foxboy can tell her who he is...I mean...he seems to know her or have recognised her before.
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 05, 2015 8:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hmm. Elona's a pretty cool customer. I wonder what it would take from Sionn to get her to loose that cool >D.

Anyway, just because she said he can't come WITH HER doesn't mean he can't be in the forest. Annnnd the forest seems like a pretty expectable place for a fox to hang out. So it seems reasonable for him to let her go for now and follow from a distance (or enter the forest at a different point from Elona and try to find her from there.) If he's not feeling too wounded by her rejection, at least.
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2015 5:38 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Great chapter, Noni. LOVE the addition of the audio - you did well, good inflection especially during the dialogue. If you're up for it, I think it would be totally awesome if we got to hear another recording for a future chapter :3

Sionn doesn't seem like someone who gives up easily. I think he could find an argument that would convince Elona that he be allowed to tag along (Maybe he offers to help? As a fox he must have some sort of hunting instincts, haha.) And even if she doesn't accept I can see him following her anyway. As Elona herself pointed out, he stayed at the inn despite potential capture by his pursuers so I doubt her saying no will deter him.
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2015 1:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Love!

I think he should just... invite himself? Like even though she said alone he could tell her he doesn't mind tagging along.

Like reverse psychology! ^.^
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2015 5:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I dug it. I especially liked the audio to go along with it as that is how I read normally.

I think he should try to sell her on some foxy characteristics. Hunting, tracking, sense of smell. Something. Even if its not true, such an offer would be best for a hunter.

so Yes. Sell himself as an excellent hunting companion.
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2015 6:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I liked having the audio as an option as I'm one of those people who like to read along as it's being told. Plus it gives a slight idea to what Elona and Sionn sound like! Sionn is adorable by the way, just want to steal him away! Just steal him and keep him.

I love the chapter, and especially loved their interaction! The dialogue was great, and I really liked the flow of the sentences. As for what Sionn should do, well I'd say convince her that he could help, like biz said. He has to have some qualities to offer that would help. And even if he didn't. . it's not like she knows!

If that doesn't work then just tag along anyways. It might not be the best of ideas with how Elona had said alone though.

Can't wait for the new chapter!
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2015 11:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Putting the poll up! C'mon and vote, people! And... phantoms... and fairies... erm.... C'mon and vote, Ifians! I'm going to leave it up for three days, so that I can be writing this weekend. Get a voting~!
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 08, 2015 11:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just wanted to let you know that I LOVE LOVE LOVE the recording. It makes it much easier for me (being the stupidly busy being that I am) to catch up to stories that I like because I have no excuse so if you don't mind, I'd love it if you kept it up.

Not to mention that you did an excellent job with the recording- voice was solid, everything was audible, yay. (As a vocal instructor I have some small suggestions if you want to talk recording but otherwise you rocked it)

Anywhozle that's thoughts, sorry I couldn't get here for the suggestions but I have voted. Very Happy
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 08, 2015 5:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Glad to hear people are enjoying the recording! I'll do my best to keep up with it, though there might be times the recording goes up after the chapter. Im also going to get around to recording the first two chapters. Also, I'll probably take you up on that advice offer Phan. I pretty much went into this with zero instruction.

Just a reminder that the poll is set to close sometime tomorrow. Get voting, people!
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PostPosted: Fri Oct 09, 2015 8:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alrighty guys, closing the poll. Just a heads up, my laptop is gonna be out getting looked at and I'll be borrowing the beaus. This means that while the chapter may go up, there might not be an audio version straightaway. I promise to get one up before I start polling (feel free to remind me if I goof), for those of you waiting for it. Anyway, poll is closing, and here's the results:


Beg her. 0% 0% [ 0 ]
Go with the flow, and mope/follow her anyway. 20% [ 2 ]
Tell her who he is. 0% 0 ]
Let her go, follow from a distance. 20% [ 2 ]
Offer to help with his foxly hunting instincts. 30% [ 3 ]
Simply invite himself along. 20% [ 2 ]
Go into a long spiel about how much of an excellent hunting companion he is. 10% [ 1 ]


So this means Sionn will be offering his help with foxly hunting instincts. Lets see how this goes!

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PostPosted: Sat Oct 10, 2015 9:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Missed suggestion and Poll, but the option I'd have voted for won anyway xP Loving this!
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PostPosted: Fri Oct 16, 2015 11:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I listened to the audio - very expressive, particularly in the dialogue, although I found your accent a little difficult to decipher in places! But it was good to listen to.

As far as the text goes you have a smooth narrative style with a good choice of words, and it's a pleasure to read.

I missed the DP and poll - I would have suggested offering his nocturnal instincts to help her on her hunt - (foxes are scavengers rather than hunters, so that would make them a team) I'm glad to see a similar option won!

Looking forward to the next chapter. Smile
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PostPosted: Sat Oct 17, 2015 8:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chapter Four


Sionn had hidden himself in plain sight for a few hours, but shortly before dawn, he crept back to the inn, and perched himself on the top of the shoddy brick fence of the building across the way. His tail swished against the hard surface, the movement soothing his frazzled nerves, and he tapped the heel of his boot in rhythm, enjoying the soft thunk. His gaze, however, remained riveted on the inn. If she took too long, he might have to find someplace less noticeable to wait. Once the sun had risen, and the villagers woke up, it would be a lot harder to explain his presence.

Shortly after the soft light of dawn began to spread over the town, Sionn saw a hooded figure burst out of the Inn. Initially Sionn ignored the figure, despite it being a womanly one, because his miss certainly wouldn’t rush. His curiosity had his gaze following them, though, and as their stride settled, Sionn’s ears perked up. He knew that gait. Throwing himself off the wall with a smile, Sionn landed deftly on his feet, and quickly rushed up beside her. One peek around her hood, thankfully unnoticed, was all he needed, and his exclamation burst forth unbidden.

“Oh! Heh, I almost didn’t recognize you!”

She swung around to look at him, and Sionn was able to see the full force of her enchanting face. Now that Sionn had seen her in the light, he knew he hadn’t been wrong about his memory. Of course, her eyes were so startlingly different now that he could see the multitude of colors human gaze possessed. That was always the hardest adjustment between his forms, aside from walking on two legs. Or shoes, shoes were a big adjustment, but one that came quickly the first time he stepped on something. Realizing his mind was drifting, and that she was staring at him rather blankly, Sionn realized that this was no doubt another thing odd to humans, and began to babble out an excuse.

“Sorry about this, it’s just, I mean, I kinda had to go in a rush last night, but what I did was really kinda rude, right, and after all, considering how rude I accidentally was, I figured it was more than the right thing to do to track you down to apologize! Though, I guess I should apologize for just hanging around the inn until you left.”

“I- you- what?”

She still appeared a little shocked, and Sionn found his grin, which he hadn’t been able to suppress, could only grow. He’d found her!

“I hung out outside the Inn, so I could see you again!” Except, as she stared at him, she didn’t seem happy. Growing confused, Sionn listened to her halting response.

“I thought- wasn’t it obvious that-... why?”

“Why?”

“Did you seek me out?”

Sionn felt his smile twitch, but struggled to keep it in place. Of course. Of course! She won’t recognize you. That was a stupid thing to expect, and even if she did, why would you want her to? You didn’t exactly make a stellar example of yourself then, now did you? This is a blessing. A blessing! Holding his expression firmly in place, and yelling internally, Sionn almost didn’t notice when she began to speak.

“Nevermind, I need to head out. Apology accepted, I suppose. Just… Just don’t-”

No! You’ll never find her again, quick!

“Can I come with you?”

Attempting to project casual veneer, like he’d seen some humans do, Sionn folded his hands behind his head, and forced his lips into a half grin. What had that gaggle of men been saying? Something about full grins showed too much enthusiasm? What’s wrong with enthusiasm? Nonetheless, Sionn didn’t want to risk scaring her off, so he maintained the mildly aloof bearing.

“No, I’m going into the woods to hunt. Alone.”

The harsh words cracked his calm facade, and Sionn dropped his arms. What had her voice done at the end, though? Sionn didn’t know enough about speaking yet to pinpoint what had been different when she said ‘alone’, but it was enough to offer him hope. Enough to spur him to get desperate. Enough to, sadly, make him exaggerate his meager abilities.

“W-Well that’s good then! See, cause I’m-”

Sionn found the words dying on his lips as she shot him a warning look. Except, it didn’t seem like she was warning him not to cross her. She was glancing around them, and Sionn realized with a start she was advising him to the be cautious saying what he was around the humans. So. Even just saying what you are is a sin? For not the first time, Sionn wondered if joining human society had been the right decision. As he stared into her soft green eyes, though, Sionn knew he’d do anything to be near this woman, to be able to help her as she had helped him. He hadn’t consciously realized it, but every moment he’d spent on two legs, he’d been hoping to run into her. Sionn wasn’t going to squander the opportunity he had been granted.

Leaning forward and lowering his voice, Sionn continued, unaware of the grin that had slipped onto his face.

“As I was saying, I’m a fox. I can help you in the woods.”

Sionn wasn’t sure how to interpret the befuddled expression she made, but he figured it had to be better than a swift denial, and decided to press his luck.

“I have good night vision as well, so I could-” Was that panic in her eyes? Oh! The nakedness! Astounded at himself for already forgetting their odd encounter the night before, Sionn attempted to retract his statement slightly. “Well, it’s passable. I couldn’t really make out your face. But, I can help guide you through the forest!”

Sionn watched, hopeful, as she glanced up at the sky. Realizing he was selfish enough to consider delaying her until she said yes, Sionn leaned back. Mild shame swept over him that he’d contemplated such a dastardly tactic as that, and he gave her a weak smile.

“I’m sorry, forgive me, I’m delaying you to-”

“Okay, but if you can’t keep up, I’m leaving you behind. Or if you scare off the herds.”

She’d spoken quickly and turned on her heel, and Sionn merely stared at her back a moment, mouth gaping open in shock. Shaking the expression off, Sionn quickly caught up to her, hanging one step behind and doing his best to keep quiet. Sheer giddiness burned his skin, and he couldn’t believe she’d agreed, just when he’d given up. Of course, now I’ll have to show off those foxly hunting skills I claimed. Inwardly groaning, Sionn hoped it didn’t come to that.

Sionn said nothing as the muddy roads of the village faded away, watching as they approached the thinned out spattering of trees that formed the beginning of the forest. Villagers had been trying to push back the border for a long time, according to the gossip he’d overheard, but they had always been defeated by the stubborn growth of the forest. The humans might have a name for it, but to him, it was simply, the forest. Once, he’d thought of it as home, but lately, he wasn’t as confident in his belonging. Stifling the sigh that built up in his throat, Sionn willingly strode after- after… Huh.

“I’m Sionn, what’s your name?”

“What?”

“We’re not in the forest proper, but we’re far enough from the village no one should be around.” Stepping ahead of her, Sionn turned and began walking backwards, so he could see her face. “Surely we aren’t to call each other ‘you’, so what’s your name?”

When she visibly hesitated, Sionn began to nervously nibble on the inside of his cheek. He knew that the humans used names to identify, as they lacked the ability to distinguish scents on a specific enough level, and even his family picked out names, no matter how rarely they were used. So then, that meant she was hesitating because she didn’t want to tell him. He wanted to know her, with a gnawing need that surprised him. He wanted to know her name, her dreams, he wanted to know all about the shadows hidden in her pale green eyes, but it wasn’t just that. He wanted her to want to share it. Forcing a casual shrug, Sionn swung back around, so that he was facing in front and she couldn’t see his expression as he said,

“No worries. I guess since I’m not supposed to speak, I don’t need your name.” Sionn hoped his tone came off as nonchalant as he’d intended. He was struggling against the urge to look back at her face, when she spoke, softly, almost shyly.

“You may call me Elona.”

Sionn wasn’t sure where the self control it took not to dance came from, but he managed it. She’d told him. He knew her name, and it was as lovely and delicate as her scent.

“Well then,” He came to a stop, and swiveled on his heel to face her, not bothering to hide his triumphant grin. “It’s a pleasure, Elona.”

For half a heartbeat, Elona only stared wide-eyed at him, her mouth forming a small ‘o’ of surprise. Her hand lifted to cover her mouth, the dark brown leather of her glove a contrast to her creamy complexion. Then, so softly he almost missed it, she chuckled. Sionn’s ears perked up, and it was his turn to look surprised.

“O-oh, I’m sorry,” Her mirth was subsiding, but her lips still had a gentle smile. “It’s just, that was quite possibly the most formal greeting I’ve received.”

“And?” Sionn’s tail shifted behind him, twitching from side to side in his joy. While he managed to suppress the glee from his features or his posture, that damnable appendage was determined to give him away.

“And we’re in a forest.” He merely blinked, and she continued, “It’s quite a silly place for pleasantries.”

“The forest can be the most pleasant of places.” Sionn found his gaze drifting to her bow, and his stomach sank. The lightness of mood seemed to sink with it. “Though, I suppose it’s not always.”

“No.” She agreed, and Sionn was surprised to note regret in her tone. “No, it can be quite the ruthless place.”

Elona averted her gaze from his, and resumed her pace, stepping around him. Sionn remained riveted in place for a moment, turning to watch as she moved. The shadows had returned to her eyes, and Sionn was kicking himself. If he’d just had more practice speaking, he might have known when to stop. Forcing his feet into movement, Sionn trailed behind her. Despite his admonishing himself for not quieting earlier, Sionn couldn’t help the question that slipped out into the air between them.

“Do you… Do you think of yourself as ruthless?”

The silence stretched between them for quite some time, but Sionn didn’t press the issue. As they moved into the forest, the trees pressed in around them, and the underbrush grew thicker. Ahead of him, Elona moved deftly through it, stepping over fallen trees, keeping her steps still enough that the leaves and twigs didn’t so much as whisper of her presence. Sionn couldn’t help but admire the way she, when the bushes and trees began to grab at her cloak, reached for the hem, and wrapped the length of it around her neck and shoulders. The shifting shades of green must have been produced on accident, a bad batch of dye, but the way it moved with her, she almost appeared to be part of the forest herself.

After a while, with them not having run into anything, Elona drew to a stop, and shifted to face him. Sionn, almost alarmed at the intensely thoughtful expression on her face as she looked him up at down, didn’t say anything, merely stared back at her. His heart beat a quick rhythm, and he could hear it in his ears. Is she going to tell me to leave? Was my question that offensive? Wait, what exactly did I say?

“You’re drawing too much notice.” Elona’s voice was hushed, but her tone was notably irked.

Sionn wasn’t sure what she meant, and opened his mouth, but froze. If drawing notice was the problem, speaking wouldn’t help. Closing his mouth helplessly, Sionn lowered his gaze from hers, and looked at himself. It had been difficult procuring human clothes, and for a while he had gotten by wearing laundry filched from someone's drying line- he regretted that, as he hadn’t known stealing was wrong yet when he’d done it- but he was proud of his current vestments.

He’d done a lot of tricks for coin, balancing on his hands and flipping, to earn the money for the simple set of brownish red breeches and matching leather vest, and the white undershirt had been surprisingly expensive for something without sleeves. The boots had been a kind gift from a man he’d run into, a black leather that had faded deeply, going all the way up to his knees. They were a little loose around his toes, but fit nicely otherwise. The belt tied around his waist was too long, and the extra leather trailed down his belly and leg, but he liked the effect. his forearms had looked bare compared to the black fur he was used to, so he’d tied some leather straps around them. He thought he looked nice, very human-like. So what was wrong? Raising his eyes back up at her, Sionn made a shrugging motion, well aware it could lead to her deciding she’d had enough of him.

Instead she merely gaped at him a moment, before shaking her head. Sionn flinched when she reached for him, despite his certainty she wouldn’t try to harm him, and screwed his eyes shut against whatever was coming. He felt light tugs on his vest, and slowly, Sionn opened his eyes. Elona had stepped closer, and was fiddling with the strings at the top of his vest, drawing them tighter. His heart felt as if it might burst each time her fingers brushed against him, no matter how many layers were separating him from her touch. Clothing had seemed like such a bothersome human habit, and often Sionn found himself resenting the need for it, but now, with her adjusting his vest to block out the white of his shirt- he’d sluggishly realized that was her goal- Sionn was eternally grateful to whoever had thought up the idea.

As she pulled the laces, Sionn noticed her fingers trembled, and he wondered if he frightened her. She seemed so strong, so capable, but he was a beast. The fox ears and tail- his ears and tail- were proof enough of that. This brave woman who walked into the wood with her head held high had shadows in her eyes, and he was loathe to draw them out again. His hands twitched with the desire to take hers, to sooth her, his instincts screaming at him to comfort her.

~~*~~~*~~~*~~



DP this time is fairly simple: What does Sionn do? Resist his instincts? Come up with something else entirely?


Like I said, I'm not posting from my laptop, so no audio version yet. I'll do my best to get one recorded before it comes time to poll, but it's taking longer for my laptop to be repaired than I anticipated.
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 18, 2015 11:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Admittedly, it probably took me longer to realize that it started from the his POV of the event that just happened to set up for going forward.

That said, he's adorable XP

I think before he does anything, he might want to ask if he is indeed what's scaring her :3
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 18, 2015 6:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I love how intensely Sionn's emotions are coming across (especially your use of words like "burning" or "gnawing." They seem well-placed). I feel like if Elona's uneasy about something, being alerted that her uneasiness is visible would only make it worse, so it might be better for Sionn not to follow his instincts. Then again, I'm not sure if he'd figure that out by himself, and if I'm right but he goes with his instincts and ends up stressing Elona out more, it may be more entertaining for his reaction to not work out well. Hmm.
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 18, 2015 6:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm sorry the intro was so confusing, kk, is there anything you think I could do that would help that? Glad you find him adorable though! I admit that when I started to actual write him, he began coming across a lot more cutesy than I anticipated, but I think I'll stick with it.

I'm glad you noticed that, Adryrn, I spent longer than I'd care to admit choosing exactly those words. I wanted his emotions to come across stronger and more intense, I'm super glad to hear it's working.

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 18, 2015 7:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I just love Sionn so much. XD If I were uneasy, I'd want him to take my hand and ask what was bothering me. I'm not sure how she'd react to that, but that's what I'd want. haha! I do love how expressive Sionn is, and I love how he's learning to be more human. I think it's completely adorable. You know I love cultural barriers in my stories. haha! Keep up the good work!
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 12:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I particularly liked the comparison with human senses, and how alien they feel. I also thought how sweet it was that the way he'd fashioned his clothes, while trying to look human, were still wrong, to the point where Elona starts to sort them out.

He's probably enjoying this, but if he makes a physical move, he knows she'll run, and if she's attracted to him, I doubt if she'll admit that yet. She's barely allowed him to follow in the hunt.

However, Elona seems better adapted to human culture than he is, so I say he'll continue to let her adjust his clothing, maybe encourage her by talking about how to wear human clothes, and how she's managed to fit in so well - it may lead her to open out a little more about her background, and he can find out more about her.

A nice, stealthy and cunning tactic - like a fox. Wink
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 12:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Can I keep the fox? I'm keeping him, kay? Kay! Now that it's settled, I really enjoyed reading this chapter! I loved how you went back and showed their previous conversation through Sionn's eyes that way we got both perspectives! I also took notice (admittedly the second time I read through it and not the first) of something when it came to his clothing. The colors follow the actual colors on a fox and where they go. That was so clever and I'm really glad I noticed it when I did!

I was a little surprised that she's fixing his vest though, considering she had said she'd leave him behind if he scared off the herds. Yet, he's drawing notice and he's still here. Despite that, I actually am glad she's helping him rather than sending him away - especially since he was desperate enough to stretch the truth (I'm guessing that's what it is considering he seems like he dreads the idea of actually using his foxly abilities from this line here, "Of course, now I’ll have to show off those foxly hunting skills I claimed. Inwardly groaning, Sionn hoped it didn’t come to that.") to stay by her.

It also came across to me as it did Andy that he's trying to learn how to be more human. Like he knows how to talk and all that but he's still learning. I find it amazing that while he can somewhat act like a human - he doesn't know how to be completely like a human. It makes me question just how long he's been in a humanoid form instead of his actual fox body.

I'm thinking he shouldn't act on his instincts, but Sionn seems to do things without really thinking all the way . . at least that's what it seems. I'm with kk on this, maybe he should ask if it's indeed him scaring her before he reaches out to grab her hands. Though, I feel like he'd grab her hands and try to sooth her - before realizing that could startle her. That said, This is a lot to read, and I'm not sorry for having you to read it xP
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 11:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's starting to seem like Sionn is the crowd favorite character. I'll have to remember that. Glad you guys are enjoying it! I'm really glad to see the effort I put into Sionn's perspective is paying off with you guys being able to see how alien everything is to him, despite his sincere efforts. I'm probably gonna wait another day before putting up the poll, but it should go up sometime tomorrow, if I don't wait til I get my own laptop back to do an audio version.
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 12:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very well done as usual. I am quite liking Sionn as well.

As for my suggestion. I am going to agree with Crunchy. Let her keep going and try to talk to her. Make small talk and so on.
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 8:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alrighty then guys, I'm gonna go ahead and put up the poll now! (which is usually a ten minute process of tweaking the wording to be just so) which means this is the last chance to comment!
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 9:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

EDIT: Correction: Deleting the poll to buy a little more time, it'll go back up ten hours from now.
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 9:44 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm sorry I'm slow and I'm late but I'm here. Thank you for waiting for me

As all have said, Sionn is adorable. I agree with Crunchy- I think he's too perceptive to make a move, he knows she'll bolt. That or it will create a potentially permanent break on this already fragile relationship. So I think he should probably hold himself back.
However, I wouldn't put it past him to create situations where she'd have to be closer to him-- maybe the vest "slips" and needs to be corrected, maybe some coins in his pocket start jingling-- I think he could sabotage his outfit in some seemingly innocent ways in an attempt to bring light to the situation (and get closer to her, but on her terms).
It'd have to be a careful dance though, don't want her getting too frustrated and sending him away.
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 20, 2015 5:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lucky me. I barely made this dp (sorry I'm so late >_<)

I think Sionn has enough common sense not to startle her by taking her hand, or by making any other forms of physical contact. Since we know it wasn't him talking and asking questions that were disturbing her, maybe he tries to start some small talk as she fixes his vest. In hushed tones of course haha
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 20, 2015 6:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alright, glad you guys could make it! It's nice to Sionn's a fan favorite. There's three hours til I put up the poll for any other last-minuters. ^^
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 20, 2015 2:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alas, I was late for the poll but i thoroughly enjoyed this piece. I like Elona, she peaks my interest. Hmm. Sion could go for animal empathy too. He could convey a figurative puppy-face. Rock on! Very Happy
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 20, 2015 2:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alrighty, and with that, the poll is going up! Not sure how long it'll be open, probably til Saturday, but it depends on how busy I get/how quickly I get votes. As always, thanks for reading!
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 22, 2015 7:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just a reminder that the poll closes tomorrow!
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PostPosted: Fri Oct 23, 2015 6:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Poll is officially closed guys! Keep an eye out for the next chapter!

What does Sionn do as Elona adjusts his clothes?
Grab Elona's hands and try to sooth her. 12% [ 1 ]
Ask if he's what's frightening Elona. 25% [ 2 ]
Let Elona continue to adjust the clothes silently. 0% [ 0 ]
Let Elona adjust his clothes and attempt mindless small talk. 0% [ 0 ]
Let her adjust his clothes, attempt to use it as an opening to learn more about her. 50% [ 4 ]
Attempt a pitiful puppy face. 12% [ 1 ]
Sabotage his outfit subtly in attempts to get her to fix it again. 0% [ 0 ]

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 04, 2015 6:13 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Aww. I missed the poll, but I probably would have chosen that one myself anyway. ^.^

I'm still loving this, Noni, and I'm glad I finally had a chance to catch up!
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 04, 2015 10:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chapter Five


If anyone had asked her why she didn’t send Sionn on his way, Elona would be hard pressed to find any one answer. Maybe it was the way he eagerly followed her, mimicking her steps nearly identically without even appearing to notice. It’s possible it was simply the way his eyes followed her without judgement or suspicion. Perhaps it was because he seemed out of sorts both in town and in the forest, and she knew what it felt like to not belong. No matter what it was that motivated her to act so far out of character, Elona found herself adjusting Sionn’s laces.

Her fingers were quivering, and Elona wondered if Sionn could tell she’d never been this close to another person. It hadn’t seemed like a difficult plan- adjust Sionn’s clothes, find a way to hide his brilliantly red hair, resume the hunt. Yet, as she found herself staring determinedly at the white of the shirt she was attempting to hide, Elona found herself taking note of the warmth of his chest. Her fingers couldn’t help but brush against it, and his body heat seemed to emanate through the leather. She’d had no idea others were so… warm. For a brief moment, Elona closed her eyes, picturing herself leaning forward and-

“You seem really good with human clothes.”

His voice was hushed, barely a whisper, but Elona’s eyes opened in shock. She could only be grateful that his gaze was riveting down on where her hands were, rather than slightly up at her face.

“Human clothes?” Her voice was collected, not a ripple in the tone to belie the rush of unease that flowed through her.

“Well, yeah. You sure seem to have adapted. Maybe you could give me some tips?”

Disappointment tasted bitter, Elona realized as the familiar flavor seeped into her mouth. His comments were innocent enough, but Elona hadn’t been on her own so long that she couldn’t recognize when someone was digging for information. It wasn’t fair of her to be discouraged, she had, at least in some part, taken him along because she saw a little of her lost self in his overeager eyes, hadn’t she?

“E-Elona?”

Becoming aware that she had stopped moving, her hands still holding onto the laces and hovering in front of Sionn, Elona raised her gaze to his eyes, not surprised to find him already looking up at her. His expression took her by surprise. He looked guilty, like he barely wanted to meet her gaze, but more than that, he seemed apologetic. Abruptly, for practically no reason at all, Elona felt appeased. Of course he’d assume she wasn’t human, how many humans had given him the time of day before?

“What makes you think I’m not human, Sionn?”

Her tone was kind, yet Elona had hesitated ever so slightly before she said his name, unsure if she should. Everything in her being urged against it. There was something to be said for avoiding emotional attachments, and names held a special kind of power. Still, the little smile that colored his expression when she did somehow quieted the worries. This time, she’d worry about the emotional attachment later.

“You don’t smell like one.”

“Excuse me?”

“Like a human. They’re all just a little bit musty smelling, even under their individual scents. But you don’t have that mustiness. I can’t figure out yet what you smell like, but it’s… fresh.” Elona was silent as Sionn screwed his face up into a thoughtful expression and leaned a little bit closer to her, angling his nose towards her neck. “And… Almost a little sweet?”

Staring blankly back at Sionn as he pulled away and smiled earnestly up at her, Elona scrambled to try and find a defense. The lie that so easily tripped of her tongue, ‘I’m human’, was stumbling in her throat, and nothing else could get past. Shifting her eyes around, seeking a distraction, Elona found none. Biting down on the inside of her cheek, Elona merely focused on tying off the laces still- still!- in her grasp.

“Your hair, it needs to be covered.” Alarmed that her voice wasn’t as steady as she’d always maintained, Elona took a half step backwards to reach into her bag.

The neatly organized pack rested on her hip, the worn leather soft to the touch but still sturdy. Tucked into one of the inner pockets was a scarf she’d used in the previous winter. The air was beginning to cool, but as summer was only starting to end, the leaves had yet to turn, and the wind lacked the bite that she’d need protection against. Holding the green scarf in her hands, Elona turned towards Sionn and looped it over the top of his head. She had thought the scarf would make him appear like a granny, like it did during the times she’d had to use it to hide her hair, but instead it seemed to oddly suit him.

“Speaking of hair, yours seems… different.”

Sionn tilted his head, pursing his lips in thought as he stared up at it. Elona flinched, and reached up to grab the nondescript brown strands. How could he tell? Surely he hadn’t been able to see it last night? How good was his night vision? Dread balled up in the pit of her stomach at the thought of him having seen her scales, and yet, she found a blush spreading faintly over her cheeks as she thought on what else he could have seen. For not the first time, she wished she’d thought to grab for her cloak before the weapon.

“C-Cover up your hair, we need to get moving.”

With a determined stance, Elona turned her back, and strode on, sliding her bow back into her grasp. She had a quiver that she kept on her back, but Elona prefered to hold more than one arrow. Through practice, she’d managed to mostly master the art of shooting arrows in a quick succession by holding them to the side of her hand. Right now, though, she only pulled out one. There was no sign of any deer yet, and the muscles in her hands were still twitching slightly. No need to risk dropping an arrow. Realizing she hadn’t heard Sionn follow, Elona paused, then glanced over her shoulder.

Sionn stood there, hopelessly tangled in the scarf. He looked befuddled, his lips twisted into a determined grimace, as he attempted to tuck the scarf into a crook and only succeeded in tying another knot. Her shoulders dropped as she found herself smiling at him, relaxing a bit. Turning back, she reached for the scarf, undoing his handiwork.

“Here, watch me.”

Sionn seemed to open his mouth to say something, but clearly decided against speaking, and shut it silently. Elona quickly realized why he’d been having so much trouble. His ears, fluffy and twitching at the top of his head, were in a completely different place than hers, and the same vivid crimson orange as his hair. They seemed to flutter under her gaze, and Elona frowned thoughtfully. She meticulously draped the scarf gently over the top of his head, loose enough his ears could still move, wrapping the ends around to the back of his head, and then up over his forehead, tying them into a knot near his left temple, with the minor remainder of the ends dangling where a human’s left ear would have been. It was almost comical, the way his ears tented the scarf, making his head look pointed. She put her hand over her mouth to suppress a laugh, before lowering her gaze to meet Sionn’s eye.

“I… I look silly, don’t I?” Sionn guessed, no doubt from her humor.

“Only a little?” Elona offered, hoping it was a comfort.

“Well,” Sionn began, looking resolute, “If that’s what it takes to travel with you.”

Deciding against commenting on that, Elona merely gave a slight smile, before turning and resuming the hunt. She had been hunting for years now, having fallen into the profession by accident taking to it alarmingly easily. Blinking, Elona could almost feel her senses shift as she focused in on and scents and sounds of the forest. She’d heard the woods described as deathly quiet compared to the towns, but to her, it was anything but. All around her, just out of sight, life was buzzing and thriving. It made her blood beat quickly, in a primal rhythm she never quite adjusted to. Her feet found the perfect places to step in the brush as if by instinct, her breathing coming in soft pants that were nearly impossible to hear. There was a rush of wings as some birds in a nearby tree took to the sky, seeking out life, whether through food or mate. Out of the corner of her eye Elona noticed a rabbit hopping along, but she dismissed it. When she was low on food, perhaps, but until then her energies were best focused on the prey that she got the most pay for- deer.

Well. The most profitable prey she allowed herself to hunt.

~*~*~

Elona should have suspected it, as it was early in the year and late in the day, but she was still disgruntled when they didn’t run into any deer by mid-afternoon. By this point in the day it was nearly impossible to sneak up on them, making her hunting tactic practically worthless. Coming to a stop at the top of a hill, Elona spared a glance back to check on Sionn. Hunting with companionship was new to her, but aside from him occasionally directing her to where he was hearing noises, it was as if he hadn’t been there. She had to give him credit for that, he was quiet when necessary, and he didn’t seem that winded.

“Let’s find a place to stop for lunch.” Elona declared, breaking the hushed silence. She watched a moment of panic light Sionn’s eyes, before he gave a slight grin.

“Sure. Once we stop, I’ll head off to hunt for mine, and meet y-”

“Don’t worry about it this time.”

“Really?”

Elona glanced away, as surprised as he. She’d had no intentions of feeding him, and yet, his voice when he’d spoken of hunting had wavered. That, added to his actions as they trekked through the forest led her to believe that perhaps he wasn’t as proficient at hunting as he’d suggested. Her bleeding heart remembered being ravenous, remembered only getting to eat on the days she’d had a successful hunt. If there was any weakness Elona truly had, it was seeing a pair of hungry eyes.

“Yes, really. You were rather accommodating with the scarf,” Elona flicked a glance up at it, and felt a small smile bubble up, “It’s the least I can do.”

Forgetting the fact that she’d only allowed him along on some misguided impulse, Elona led him through the familiar branch of the woods to one of her favorite lunch spots. As they advanced towards it, the soft rustling of a river got louder, and Elona found herself speeding up. They broke out of the brush into a small clearing, the river cutting through it with a beautiful rush of water that sparkled in the sun. The river curved when it met the jutting edge of broad stones that formed a semi-circle, wrapped around the outside of it. The boulders were flat-topped, and warm from the sun. She’d stumbled upon it, and while she’d never known how the boulders got there, she’d always enjoyed the splendor of the view.

“Woah!” Sionn exclaimed behind her, and Elona felt pride bloom through her that he was as impressed as she. “I’ve never seen this part of the forest!”

Leading the way to the boulders, Elona sat in the middle of one, keeping a good distance from the edge. Beautiful though it was, the river was deceptively quick. She’d dropped an apple in once, and it’d been gone before she could blink. Elona removed her cloak and spread it in front of her, shifting onto the edge of it. Gesturing for Sionn to sit next to her, she watched as he plopped down with enough force to make her cringe. Pulling off the scarf, Sionn shook out his hair and wiggled his ears. Elona stared for a moment, before opening her bag and removing the supplies she’d planned for her lunch. A small bag of apples, some dried rabbit jerky from her last hunting excursion, a hunk of expensive cheese, and a small loaf of bread. She set them down on the cloak, before turning back to her bag to look for a knife to cut the bread and apples.

“Hey no worries, I got this.” Glancing up, Elona watched as Sionn slid a slim dagger out of his boot, wipe it on the edge of the cloak, and start slicing the bread. “See? I’m helpful.”

He sounded so sincerely pleased with himself that Elona allowed her knife, now gripped in her hand, to slide back into the bag unnoticed. Smiling, Elona felt a bittersweet twang in her heart. She could almost delude herself into believing this shared lunch was a normal affair. Reality edged in, though, reminding her that he, too, would leave. He might not go for the same reasons as the rest, but go he would. He’d have to, she couldn’t afford to keep him around. How long before her secret slipped?

“Hey there, why the somber expression?”

Startled, Elona raised her eyes from her food to find Sionn had leaned over and down to break into her line of vision. His features were almost boyish, but for the first time Elona noticed the faintest of scars on the end of his left eyebrow, forming a little c. Reminded of her own scars, Elona reached out and touched her hand to it- Sionn flinched from her touch, and laughed cheerlessly.

“I’m sorry.” Elona offered, but Sionn shook his head.

“No, no, it’s okay.”

It was odd to see a crack in his jaunty attitude, and Elona regretted what she’d done. Chewing on her lip a moment, Elona tried to think of a way to bring his light-hearted mood back.

“Thank you.’
“For what?” Sionn looked genuinely confused, and Elona couldn’t blame him.

“For… accompanying me.”

“Oh.” He smiled, and Elona felt the pressure inside her ease. “Well, now who’s being overly formal?”

“Huh?” Remembering his introduction earlier that day, Elona laughed. “Ah, I suppose you got me.”

They shared a very pleasant lunch, and while neither of them mentioned their past at all, they did speak briefly of the incident the night before. Sionn expanded on his explanation, and Elona admitted she had fallen asleep in the bath. By the end of their conversation, somehow, Sionn had made something that had frightened her and set all her nerves on edge when it occurred into quite the laughable joke. In fact, he’d actually gotten a few laughs out of her. She couldn’t remember a time when she’d felt so at ease.

Pushing to her feet, Elona gathered up the bag the food had been stored in and tucked it into her pack, stringing it over her shoulder. She was relaxed, but not totally without caution. Leaving her cloak on the rock, Elona excused herself, telling Sionn to wait for her there. Sneaking off into the forest aways away, Elona addressed her business, before returning to where she’d left Sionn.

As she walked into the clearing, she didn’t immediately see him, and felt an astonishingly distressing pang in her heart at the thought that he’d left. Relief didn’t follow when she did see him, though, for she realized he was on the very edge of the rock, peering into the river. A cold heat swept over her, and Elona sprinted forward, calling out his name. Sionn turned to look at her, lifting his hand in a wave, and Elona watched as he lost his footing and slipped wordlessly into the water.


~~*~~~*~~


DP:
What does Elona do? Remember, being touched by water reveals secrets she’d rather keep.
[/i]
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 04, 2015 11:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

OH DEAR GODS YOU HAD TO MAKE HIM FALL. I should have expected it when you mentioned the apple but I didn't and this is what happened. I really liked reading her walls coming down a bit - especially the stutter! And picturing Sionn and that scarf made me chuckle so thank you for that before you ripped my heart out with him falling in. Yeah. I went there. xP

For this DP, I can't have just one suggestion. Though it seems I never do have just one with your chapters do I? First off, maybe she could find something to reach out to him further down the river? I would say jump right in and get him but . . she's been hiding this secret for I'll assume much longer than we know and Sionn while friendly and lovable is still technically a stranger! So I'm actually quite torn.

I'd like her to jump in there, maybe cover his eyes or grab him from behind so he doesn't actually see everything there is to hide, but I don't know if that is how Elona would act.
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2015 6:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh! She has to go get him! Maybe run to the edge first and see if maybe he can somehow get himself out, or she can reach him without getting in? If not, she has to go get him. She has to!

Also, heh musty smelling humans. I like it! Very Happy
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2015 7:49 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

A good chapter, really moving.

But... use the cloak. xD She's quick enough to run, grab the cloak and use it as leverage. Or even tie it to a big fat stick to extend the reach. Et voilá. If all else fails, jump in, reveal her secret, smooch, drama and getting past the chemical into physical.

Hubba hubba, we have ourselves a winner. xD
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2015 11:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Considering the river is quick moving, Elona isn't exactly going to have the time to grab something to throw in after Sionn and haul him to shore, and depending on the undercurrent he might not be able to resurface for enough time for her to grab him further down, so I say Elona goes all in herself and jumps. Sionn already knows she's not human, and he hasn't given her any reason to not trust him should her true nature be revealed (if anything, he'll probably just become more attached, haha).
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2015 11:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Okay, this chapter was ADORABLE. I LOVED watching them interact. Sionn is ADORABLE. I still want to huggle him. XD

AND HE FELL IN!! Like Sapph, I noted the apple, but it still caught me off guard.

Screw the secret!! He's gotten into her heart, and she knows it! She' can't just let him DROWN!! GO GO GO!!!
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2015 12:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Im glad everyone is enjoying it so far! I've actually had this dp planned for like two or three chapters now, it's nice to finally get it out of my head. The way these posts are going, I'll probably give it a day or two before I put up the poll. I can't wait to get to the next chapter!



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PostPosted: Fri Nov 06, 2015 7:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mwahaha. I love how you gave us all this set-up of Elona slowly getting attached to Sionn/Sionn being cute in general, and then you THROW HIM IN A RIVER. Part of me would love to see Elona panic and do nothing while Sionn gets swept away just to see her feel awful afterward. Then again, it feels like she kind of has to save him at this point? But that "has to" feeling seems like a marker to do something different, so I think I'll stick with having Elona panic and miss her chance. (Maybe he could find something to grab onto downstream/manage to avoid drowning some other way that's out of Elona's sight. Or not. Whichever. Torment us >D.)
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 06, 2015 9:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Elona strikes me as far too soft-hearted to just let him drown and then wring her hands going 'but there was nothing I could do'. Besides she's already got the suspicion that he's seen her and he's pretty well confirmed that he knows she's not human. It's possible he knows what she is and can give her answers. After all she's spent so long being human that perhaps there are things she doesn't know that she really needs to and he can answer them.

Into the river with her.

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 07, 2015 3:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Great chapter, Noni. Their interactions are simultaneously adorbale and yet very telling of each character, revealing lots of growth. I like it a lot.
And yeah, I have to agree with everyone already. If the river is really that fast moving, IN SHE GOES. She might hesitate or whatnot, but I really think she'll jump in. She already knows he knows she's not human at this point, kind of seems useless to keep hiding it at the expense of what seems to be her only friend.
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 07, 2015 4:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Heads up guys, Im itching to get to the next chapter (and minorly pullied, though I won't name names.), so the poll is only going to be up for roughly 24 hours unless I'm explicitly asked to extend it. Happy voting!
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 07, 2015 6:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

*raises hand* Was bullying... I regret nothing!
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PostPosted: Mon Nov 09, 2015 1:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Aggh, I missed the DP and the vote - but very satisfied with the outcome. On with the next chapter!
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PostPosted: Mon Nov 09, 2015 5:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dang XD oh well, I look foreward to seeing the water shenanigans~
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2015 3:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chapter Six


Sionn hadn’t intended to die today, he reflected, but he had to admit, hearing Elona say his name was pretty satisfying, as far as it being the last thing he ever heard. Struggling against the swift current, Sionn found himself dragged under the water again. One moment, he’d turned towards Elona, elated to hear her calling for him, and the next, his foot had slipped, and he was plunged into the water. The surface had been initially warm, but once the water had gone over his head it was chillingly cold, and disturbingly swift. He had no idea how far he’d been dragged by the time his lungs gave out, and the world through the water around him was a multifaceted blur. A bend in the river thrust him along the riverbed, and Sionn let out the last of his breath in a gasp of pain. The grit and gravel that lined the bottom dragged against his exposed skin, and Sionn felt his vision start to blacken.

Somewhere in the distance, Sionn thought he heard a distorted splash, like something had fallen in. Elona! Suddenly enlivened, Sionn forced his eyes to open farther, willing his limp limbs to do something. How did a human body swim? Whether it was luck or his own sluggish movements, Sionn broke the surface. Swallowing a deep gulp of air, Sionn turned his head, trying to spot Elona. Does she know how to swim? Sionn frantically questioned, ignoring that his own brain couldn’t provide the answer. Did she fall in after me? Or did she- Sionn thoughts were distorted as the current grabbed at his feet and dragged him back under. Water rushed up his nose, and he nearly sputtered out the small breath he’d forced into his lungs, but Sionn focused his frenzied energy on searching the water for any sign of Elona.

Even a fox with human form could only hold his breath so long, though, and Sionn felt his arms move haltingly against the beating pressure of the water. There was a pressure in his head, like he was going to pop, but still, he forced himself towards the surface as best he could. Elona… With her name as a murmured last thought, Sionn’s body went limp, subject to the mercy of the river. A flutter of deep navy blue caught his eye just as he began to drift out, and Sionn turned his head. The water still blurred his vision, but a form all decked out in greens and browns was advancing towards him steadily, vivid turquoise and teal sparkling against the gloom creeping in. As he drifted out of consciousness, Sionn reached a hand out towards the splendid vision.

~*~*~

It was violent, almost, the way that the water thrust itself out of his lungs. Turning to his side and spasming, Sionn gasped for breath, scared to open his eyes. What had happened? Slowly, his memory drifted back to him. The picnic, Elona’s voice, the water… That vivid figure in the water. His eyes snapped open and he sat up straight, twisting sharply. His eyes landed on what he’d been looking for- Elona. She was looking at him with an expression of pure relief, but the instant his gaze met hers, shame washed over it. Blinking, Sionn stared at her, making no attempt to avert his eyes.

“That’s a really pretty color on you.” Sionn finally said, unsure if it was the right thing to do.

Bracing his hands on the ground next to him, Sionn squished his fingers through the mud. The slide of oozy muck was a sensation familiar to him, no matter the form, and it grounded him. Elona, the beautiful, wonderful woman who had saved his life twice over now- three if he counted hiding in her room- kneeled next to him, her skin a vivid blue green. While her clothes still mostly covered her, they were sopping wet and torn to disarray, and her gloves were missing. Scales, which had presumably been the beautifully turquoise he’d seen in the water, now shone a dull teal green over the back of her hands and up from the neckline of her top along the side of her face, crawling over her cheekbones. Her face was still mostly smooth, but the blue-green color was a vast change from her creamy pale complexion.

Sionn thought she was absolutely gorgeous, a work of art comprised of so many colors he couldn’t normally see. Water dripping down his face, Sionn started to lean towards her, unsure why he was, and his heartbeat began to quicken. Reaching up, his fingers still shaking from the cold of the water, Sionn brushed some of Elona’s shoulder length hair behind her ear. Abruptly, his hand still holding her hair, Sionn squinted at it.

“It’s different.” He was surprised, but also proud of himself. He’d been right! “It’s not that bark brown anymore.” Her hair had been that deep navy blue he’d seen!

“I-” Elona finally spoke, and Sionn noticed she began to shake. “I-”

“I’m a fox,” Sionn said helpfully, grinning at her, hoping to put her at ease. “What are you?”

“I don’t… know.” Elona burst into quiet sobs, reaching up to cover her face with her hands.

Sionn’s heart shattered. There she was, soaked, streaked with mud, and shaking like a leaf in a storm, tearfully wreaking havoc on his soul. It’d been infatuation, he realized, that had him following her like a little kit, but now… Whoops. Mom’s sure gonna be mad at me! Reaching towards her, Sionn wrapped her in a hug, and pulled her close, dragging her through the mud. Humans do this, He reflected, I always wondered why, but it’s so… nice.

~*~*~


Sionn wasn’t sure how long they’d sat there, or how many times Elona had mumbled protests that went ignored, but by the time they’d moved, they were mostly dry. It was fascinating to watch, as Elona’s skin dried, the color fade and the scales seemingly vanish. The only remaining mark of her multicolored glory was a few blue green streaks around her eyes from her tears. It was Elona who finally stood, pulling him to his feet as well.

“We need to set up a camp before it gets dark.”

They walked away from the river, deeper into the forest, and Sionn noticed that Elona didn’t seem as sure of herself as she had before. He could guess at the reason, because it was likely the same as his. He’d never been in this part of the forest before, didn’t know it as well. The trees were taller, older, and as they walked, it seemed to get darker and deeper. This wasn’t the woods he’d called home, it was almost as if a completely different forest was nestled inside it. Finally, they found a tiny clearing that Elona seemed to consider suitable enough to set up, and he helped her gather some rocks and firewood to set up a small fire.

As she reached into her muchly-abused bag, looking for something to start the fire, guilt burned through Sionn. How many of her supplies had she lost in that river rescuing him? He noticed that she didn’t seem to have her cloak or her bow any longer, most likely left on that rock along with the scarf she had loaned him. Closing his eyes, Sionn degraded himself. There you go again, you stupid kit, causing nothing but trouble for those around you. With a sigh, Sionn rubbed the back of his neck, attempting to formulate an apology.

“I-I’m sorry that-”

“I’m sorry I didn’t warn you about the river,” Elona interrupted, still shuffling through her bag. “I told you it was one of my favorite spots, but I didn’t warn you of the dangers.”

“... Thank you for saving me,” Sionn’s mind began to make connections. “Oh. That’s why you were so violent that night. You were worried I’d see… what I just… saw.” Groaning, Sionn smacked his face. “I’m sorry. You plainly didn’t want-”

“Sionn.” Elona was looking at him now, and while Sionn could see the hesitation in her expression, there was trust there too. “I- … Only a few have seen that. And none have responded the way you did. As long as you don’t tell anyone, I don’t…. I don’t regret it.”

“I...Elona?” Sionn felt awkward saying this now. “I know I say it lightly, but, I really… I really am a fox, and, I really shouldn’t have told you. I only did because… because..” Now. Now is the time to tell her. But… She’ll think of me as pathetic. She’s had to rescue me so many times, what’s to stop her from washing her hands clean of me? She’d become so important, growing in his heart wistfully since their first meeting and now, blooming suddenly into the very breath he breathed.

“What do you mean, really a fox? I’ve seen other foxkith before, you know.”

Foxkith. He’d heard that term, his father had warned him it was what human would mistake him for, but Sionn was pleased that she had used the kinder term. Beastial. A derogatory term the humans applied to the beings born with animal appendages or traits. That was what she thought he was, after all, no one had heard of beings who could shift between animal and human form. That was exactly how his family wished it, and he’d broken their greatest rule in his attempts to persuade her, purely because he knew she wouldn’t take him seriously. Now that she might, Sionn found his throat clogged more than when he’d been drowning. If she knew what he was, how inadequate he’d been as a fox, would she want to put up with him as an… ‘foxkith’? Sionn remained in thought as she started the fire, before blurting out,

“I’m… I’m not a foxkith.”

He expected confusion, for her to tug on his ears, anything but what she did.
“Okay.” A smile, still weary from her earlier tears, “Wanna talk about it?”

“I’m a fox. I mean, I guess I’m whatever I am now, too, but mostly I’m a fox. A.. magical fox?” Why was this so hard to explain. The words fumbled in his mouth, and Sionn felt like he was only just learning to speak again. “My- my family,” This part was harder, how could he risk his family like this? “We’re a group of foxes. As far as any of us can remember, we’ve all had the ability to turn into humans- mostly.” His ears twitched, and his tail curled tighter around him. “Most of us, well, almost all of us, stay as foxes all the time. We just use these forms for added protection from hunters. But I.. I… I was never very good at being a fox. So I decided,”

“Why not try being a human?” Elona’s voice was soft, understanding, and suddenly, Sionn realized that she understood far more than he might have suspected.

“Yes.”

Sitting down, Sionn stared into the roaring fire Elona had nurtured, finally feeling drained. His endless energy had been tapped, with the varied events of the day. As the fire crackled and popped, Sionn reflected on how long it had been since he’d smelled a campfire. The scent had always appealed to him, despite the danger it presented to an animal. His chin pitched forward as, for merely a second, he dozed off, and with a jump, Sionn shook his head, trying to shake free the grogginess.

“Go to sleep, Sionn,” Elona’s voice sounded like it was from far away, but Sionn found it compelling anyhow. He closed his eyes and allowed his body to slowly drop towards the ground, surprised when he head hit something soft and warm, and then he slid seamlessly into sleep.

~*~*~


There was a soft fluttering around his ears, and Sionn smiled. It felt nice. Blinking his eyes open, Sionn was surprised to see the fire in front of him was… sideways? Screwing his face into a thoughtful frown, Sionn contemplated the shift of the earth for an embarrassingly long amount of time before he realized that it was because he was laying down.

“You awake?”

All at once, as if in a burst of information, Sionn’s brain caught up with what was happening and overloaded him with sensations. He was laying on Elona’s thigh, using it as a pillow for quite some time if the rays of dawn filtering through the trees were any indication. Her hand was resting softly on his head, her fingers shifting aimlessly through his hair near his ear. Sionn felt a scorching heat drift over his face, and hopelessly pleaded with whatever powers that be that she didn’t see it. Sitting up, Sionn attempted to stretch lazily, turning away from her and willing his face to cool.

As he scratched the back of his head, anything to delay having to look at Elona, Sionn noticed something through the trees he hadn’t seen before. Pushing to his feet, Sionn squinted, trying to get a better glance at it, but all he could tell was that there was something gray in the distance. Sionn’s inspection of the object didn’t break as he heard Elona stand as well, and he took a step towards it.

“That’s really odd. There’s something gray that way,” Sionn lifted a hand to point, finally tearing his eyes away from it to look over at Elona. “We should check it out. Maybe it’ll give us an idea of where we are.”

For a moment, Elona looked like she was going to argue against the implication she didn’t know where they were, but then a look of resignation crossed her, her shoulders slumping, and she nodded. As Sionn turned back towards the weird sliver of gray- all he could see through the densely packed trees- he heard Elona snuffing the fire and stepping next to him. His stomach growled as he remembered that he hadn’t eaten since the late lunch the day before, but Sionn ignored it. Sionn turned back to Elona, watching as she squinted to find what he’d been looking at. The moment she saw it though, she started walking forward, almost as if… compelled. There was no recognition in her eyes, and yet she looked entranced. Suddenly alarmed, Sionn followed behind her.

It took them nearly an hour to finally break through the thick brush of trees and approach what they’d been following. They stood in what had most likely once been a clearing, but now, untamed, the brush was edging in and pushing close. All around them trees were at war with stone pillars, both covered in an alarming amount of moss. Sionn realized a pillar had been what he’d seen, however what the pillars surrounded was far more interesting. It was an elaborate building made of stone, which seemed to vanish into the rolls of tree-infested hills around it, as if it were merely a doorway, and not the whole building.

The entrance was a pair of wide stone doors, and as Sionn and Elona got closer, stepping over broken and mossy stone steps that threatened to break their ankles, Sionn realized that these doors were merely carved onto the true doors, what he had assumed were the walls of the structure. They were large enough for a giant beast to make it through, an entire herd of deer even, all at once. To their left, one of the ‘doors’ had had the roof cave over it, leaving only a sliver of it accessible. Reaching forward and resting his hand on the carved door handle of the blocked door, Sionn wondered what it could possibly take to open such a thing, let alone build it.

Next to him, Elona was quiet. When Sionn looked at her, he was relieved to see the bewitched look had left her eyes. Instead, she merely appeared curious, like he, and maybe a little unnerved? Reaching out, Elona brushed away some of the moss and dust sticking to the door, and Sionn noticed that intricate swirls and designs had been carved in. Elona ran her fingers delicately through them, as if she was trying to memorize them, and Sionn watched, fascinated. Maybe they were letters? While his family hadn’t figured out how to read, they did know of it.

“What does it say?”

“Huh?” Elona turned towards him, her sage green eyes wide and her expression more open than he’d seen it since they’d met, “I’m not sure. It feels like I should be able to tell, but I can’t. It’s nonsense.”

“Odd.” Sionn chewed on the inside of his cheek. “My dad always said to listen to little things like that, that it may be the difference between life or death. Maybe it has to do with what you are?”

The look she shot him was startled and almost astounded, and Sionn wondered if perhaps that had been the wrong thing to say.

“Whatever I am is likely a monster, why would I want to know?”

Her hand had slid down the door as she spoke, and rested on the carved handle. Whatever Sionn was going to respond with died in his throat when there was a flash of light. The swirls and etchings all suddenly glowed a vivid light blue, brightening in intensity until Sionn couldn’t see anything. Frightened, he reached out, relieved when he felt Elona’s arm under his hand, and grasped it, stepping closer and attempting to angle his body to block the light from her. There was a ringing in his ears, painful and sharp, leaving a metallic tang in his mouth.

Out of nowhere, it all stopped. Sionn and Elona stood in front of the odd stone structure, Elona wrapped up in Sionn’s attempt at a protective embrace, the forest filled with nothing more than the soft noises of birds waking to the dawn. Shaking, Sionn pulled away, glancing up at Elona’s face. Her expression was stark surprise, and all the color had drained out of her face. Sionn wrapped her hand up his his grip, but her gaze didn’t falter. She was staring behind him, at the doors. Slowly, Sionn turned.

The carved door had turned inward, leaving an opening just large enough for Elona and Sionn to pass through. The symbols on the front were still faintly glowing blue, but it was quickly fading. Just inside the opening was a set of torches, burning steadily. Beyond them was dark, nearly impossible to see through.


~~*~~~*~~~*~~


Alrighty guys! That was a toughie, hope you guys enjoyed it.
The DP is a little looser than normal: What do they do? Feel free to give suggestions for both characters or just one. If it gets complicated enough, I may do two polls, one for each of them.

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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2015 3:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!!

Sionn is okay, and the world is rosy, and he tried to protect her, and SQUEEEE!!! It was just fantastic.

Let's live dangerously. Enter the creepy tunnel. =D
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2015 6:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I've given you my thoughts personally on this already, but here it goes! I held my breath the entire time Sionn was in the water until Elona appeared - I also adored that even as he's drowning he's worried about her - THE ENTIRE TIME. I wanted to crawl into the story and hold Elona as she sobbed when it came to light for Sionn that she had no clue what she was. I wanted to rock her and tell her that everything would be alright.

I also LOVED the thought he had about his Mom going to kill him. That and how Elona let him sleep on her thigh and played with his hair. I adored that.

As far as the DP goes, I think maybe they should wait to go in. Maybe not stray too far but try to find something that they could use as a weapon in case something goes wrong inside there. Something tells me though that they shouldn't go in just yet. Maybe find some food of some sort?
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2015 11:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oooh. Well, one can't just magically open a ruined old door and NOT enter. I'm leaning toward Elona not wanting to go in and Sionn persuading her. It seemed ironic at first since it seems like the place holds more potential personal meaning/game-changing info for Elona, but the more I think about it, the more it actually made sense to me? Elona seems pretty focused on stability, so entering a creepy tunnel when there are other options already seems unlikely for her, and a creepy tunnel that seems to resonate for her specifically and could change her view of the world or herself is even MORE dangerous in a way. But Sionn just had to see her cry when she told him she didn't know what she was, so it would make sense for him to think she might end up happier if she does learn more about herself. To me at least.

I also really liked the detailed description of Sionn almost drowning. If you didn't research it specifically, at least you imagined it thoroughly, and the end product is a lot more interesting to read than it would have been otherwise.
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2015 5:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lovely, NoNi. This was heartwarming. Very Happy Liked the drowning and waking scenes the most, too.

As for what to do... I'd say they'd go in. Of course! Very Happy No good adventure is without a mysterious cave-like area.
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2015 11:18 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Go through the door!

I love these two. It was so sweet! *cuddles with her feelings* I love this so much, Noni!
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2015 12:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Aaah, my heart, so adorable!!! I'm glad Sionn is alright, and its great to see them getting steadily closer. Excellent work, Noni :3

As for the dp...well there's really only one logical answer when confronted with a mysterious door that mysteriously leads to a mysterious cave - GO IN of course! Very Happy
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2015 4:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm glad you guys are enjoying it, and I appreciate all the feedback! Since it doesn't look like any more suggestions are forthcoming, I'm going to put the poll up very shortly. Comment while you can!
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2015 4:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Poll is up! While it's a simple one, I hope to get all the stragglers caught up if they're still reading (Lil and Crunchy, lookin' at you!) so I'll probably leave it up for the whole weekend, closing it sometime on Monday.
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2015 5:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alrighty, my vote is sent in!

Im sorry I didnt get toread it until now, but I am pretty excited to see what possible connection she might have to this place. Smile
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2015 10:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

This is a friendly reminder that the poll has only 29 hours left! Get caught up and vote!



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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2015 11:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Of course they're going to go in. No good story comes of ignoring things like this. Of course it may all come to a sudden and abrupt halt because this was a wrong choice but it's also the interesting one.
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2015 6:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Poll is closed!

The mysterious door has opened. They...?
Go in!
55%
55% [ 5 ]
Look around for a weapon or food first.
22%
22% [ 2 ]
Go in at Sionn's persuasion.
22%
22% [ 2 ]
Total Votes : 9
Who Voted: Adryrn, Andolyn, Cyberworm, Kalanna Rai, kkdestiny, Novelest_Ninjagirl, Phantomfan, Sapphire_Rayne, Seraphi


Result: Go in!

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 16, 2015 6:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I thought I had voted, I distinctly remember looking at the poll and hitting "go in", but apparently that was all a dream since I don't see my name on there... weird.

At least the one I wanted won! ^.^
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PostPosted: Mon Nov 16, 2015 11:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chapter Seven



As Elona stood in front of the mysterious door, she reflected on how she’d somehow come to this point. One little yes, and suddenly, rather than simply hunting down deer and selling the meat and hide for a tidy sum, she’d jumped full force into a river, lost her cloak, barely kept her bag, revealed her ‘circumstances’ to an essential stranger, and opened a presumably magic door. As if that all wasn’t distressing enough, now she had an excited fox tugging at her arm, goading her into going inside.

“C’mon! It opened just for you, we have to go in!”

Sionn’s voice sounded as if it came from a distance, Elona was still so wrapped up in her head. Her mind was fuzzy, between the lack of sleep and the trepidation of the unknown. That’s right, trepidation. It wasn’t fear, it was caution. Caution kept her safe. Caution kept her healthy. Caution… kept her alone. Finally tearing her gaze away from the dark tunnel in front of her, Elona looked at Sionn. He was holding onto her arm, and glancing excitedly between her and the tunnel. She could feel the warmth of his palm on her upper arm, the way his fingers pressed softly into her flesh with no hesitance. He didn’t fear her. Elona had always been feared by those who saw what she was. Beastial seemed a compliment compared to the screams she’d heard.

Sionn didn’t scream. He smiled at her, he broke bread with her, he slept on her thigh and didn’t mind her being close. He had reached for her in the water, even as he’d seen what she was. He had reached for her. Now, he wanted to go inside a creepy tunnel that opened to her touch. A tunnel that would no doubt reveal that she was just as monstrous as she had always believed, and she’d no longer be able to deny it, pretend she was something good deep down. The nightmares wouldn’t go away, they’d get worse.

But… Sionn wants to go in. Sionn, her only friend. The first time in years she’d thrown away caution, and she’d made a friend. She hoped they were friends by this point, but she knew saving his life didn’t guarantee that. What if whatever they found in there only diminished how he felt about her? What if she found out she was some river beast that devoured men heart and soul? Would he stay? Would he run away? Would Sionn, too, scream? Did it matter? Elona didn’t know for sure what would happen if they went in, but she knew that Sionn wanted to, and he was her friend.

So Elona took a step forward, glancing over her shoulder at the forest, her gaze skimmed over the fading glowing shapes on the door. Mid-step, Elona stopped. Sionn, still holding onto her arm, came to a stop too, and glanced at her curiously.

“What is it?”

“I can read it now.” She breathed it, staring at the letters in shock.

“What?”

“ ‘Answer the riddles to proceed’. The door. I can read it now.”

“Really?” Elona felt Sionn lean around her to peer at the door himself. “Still looks like scribbles to me.”

“I don’t like this, Sionn.” Elona confessed in a quivering murmur, startled at her own honesty.

At first, she didn’t know what he was doing. Then, she realized the warmth was familiar. He’d taken a step closer, and hugged her from behind, his arm slung over her collarbones. Slowly, almost scared to frighten him off, Elona moved her hand away from where it still rested on the door, touching it to his arm. Elona wasn’t sure when she’d lost the gloves. In the river? Had she taken them off in the night? Either way, it was a shock when she felt his skin beneath her fingertips. She’d forgotten the odd texture of skin. Unlike anything else she’d ever felt, with a soft pulsing warmth beneath it. It grounded her, and Elona realized something. Something very, very dangerous. She cared deeply for this person, and that opened her up. It left her open to danger, to worry, to pain. It changed her priorities, and altered her decisions.

“Okay. I think I can handle riddles.” She finally declared, pushing some of her normal confidence forcefully into her tone. “Are you any good at them?”

“Sure! They usually require thinking about words differently, right? I usually think of words backwards anyways.”

Sionn said it so boastfully that Elona laughed, and turned towards him. He dropped his arms as she did, and for a moment, Elona imagined grabbing them and holding him in the hug. Reminding herself that she mustn’t get greedy, Elona gave a firm nod, and turned towards the doorway. A burning nausea was eating it’s way up from her belly, but Elona strode forward anyway, feeling quite naked without her bow and quiver. Picking up one of the wall torches, Elona lifted it from it’s holder, the grain of the wood of the handle causing a comfortingly painful pressure.

“Sionn, don’t-” Before she could even finish the warning, Sionn had bounded off in front of her, going as far as the light reached and glancing around. “... do exactly what you did.”

Sighing, and shaking her head affectionately, Elona stepped forward again, into the tunnel proper. Holding her breath, Elona waited. Nothing happened. Another step, and she glanced behind her. Staring at the door, she glared at it, willing it, almost daring it, to move. Relaxing her shoulders, Elona kept going, her stride eating up the ground until she caught up with Sionn. Behind her, the door slowly drifted shut. It wasn’t until the sound of stone grating against stone reached Elona that she spun around and groaned. The door had not only shut, it had seemingly fused back into the wall, and now they were trapped.

Lifting her chin, Elona did an about face. Staring at the other torch, willing the wall to turn back into a door, wouldn’t help her get anywhere. As always, when things got tough, the only way to go… Was forward. For a few minutes, all it was was a stone tunnel. The paving stones inside were presumably the same shade of gray as the outside, but the sputtering light of the torch cast a golden orange sheen on them. They lined not only the floor, but the walls and ceiling as well. Sionn chattered the whole way, running his hands over the stones and glancing around. Gradually, Elona realized it was a nervous gesture. He was as frightened as she about being trapped. Oddly, this left her with a fervent need to protect him, and granted her access to yet another reservoir of courage.

Just as she’d had that thought, the tunnel ended abruptly at a door. There wasn’t a handle, but it certainly looked like a door. Sionn was glancing between her and the door, and it looked like he was attempting to be subtle, but failing nonetheless. He won’t force me. It was an astonishing thought, considering they were both presumably trapped inside these stone ruins, but one she believed with the full force of her being. He would gladly sit there and rot with her if she didn’t want to keep going. It was a weight off her shoulders, but an added responsibility too. Whatever happened, this was entirely her own decision.

“Alright, mysterious stone ruins, I’m up for the challenge.”

Elona reached forward and pressed her palm against the blank stone. For a brief moment, nothing happened. Then, there was a flash of light. It wasn’t as blinding as the one that opened the ruins, there was no ringing in her ears, no metallic taint. It was just bright enough to drown out the torch, and when it faded, there were glowing etchings on the door that hadn’t been there before. Taking a deep breath, Elona held her breath as the same strange swirls seemed to form words before her eyes.

“What’s it say?” Sionn had propped his head over her shoulder, as if by looking at it closer to her eyes he’d have a better chance of understanding it.

“ ‘If you have me, you want to share me. If you share me, you haven't got me. What am I?’ “

Elona stated in a pondering tone, her mind already trying to wrap around the riddle. She hadn’t had much practice with them, but they had always intrigued her. She’d heard this one, somewhere, she was sure of it. Was this strange temple-esqe place starting them off with an easy one? It wasn’t too hard to fathom, it was plainly magical. A test of skill, perhaps? Nibbling on her lower lip thoughtfully, Elona lifted her free hand to her hip, resting it there and staring almost challengingly at the door.

“‘If you have me, you want to share me,’ “ She repeated to herself in a mumble. “‘If you share me, you haven’t got me.’ Hm.”

“Hey,” Sionn’s head, which had apparently been bowed in thought at some point, jumped up. “I think I got it.”

“Really?”

“I- I’m not sure though. I mean, I’m terrible with them, and constantly want to share them, but you seem pretty good at it-” Sionn’s voice was endearingly bumbling as his thoughts jumped around inside his mouth.

“Oh.” His rambling clicked it all together, and Elona grinned smugly, turning her attention to the door. “I do believe you’re right. Well, door, perhaps this is the answer you’re looking for- ‘A secret.’”

The glowing words faded, and Elona swiftly looked over at Sionn, unsure what she should do. Was the door opening? Had they answered incorrectly? Her breath caught in her throat as she waited for a change, any change. The slightest of shifts occurred beneath her hand, and tentatively, Elona pushed on the door with more strength. There was the same rasping stone-on-stone sound as the door opened, and Elona moved forward into the revealed room, Sionn close on her heels.

This time, it wasn’t a tunnel. The first thing that Elona noticed was the breaks in stone near the ceiling- and it was a tall ceiling. Even if she’d been a startlingly tall woman instead of a modestly tall one, she wouldn’t have been able to reach up and touch the ceiling, maybe not even if she jumped. The room was wider than the tunnel, she and Sionn could probably both lay down with their feet touching opposite walls, and been able to reach up and touch the others head. It was square, and like the hallway, lined almost completely in square, neatly placed stones. The only breaks were narrow lines near the ceiling on the far wall from the door, where all she could make out was a deep dark shadow. Stepping into the center of the room, Elona lifted her torch as high as she could and surveyed all that was around her. No riddle, no smooth ‘door’ stone. Just an empty, square room.

It was as she frowned at this revelation that the stone door, again, creaked shut. For a split second, Elona debated shoving Sionn through and making a break for it- but then she’d be stuck between two closed doors with no way onward. She had to take a risk, for the… however many-th time since meeting Sionn, and stayed inside the room. It seemed each time she had a reckless moment, it got easier. That’s not good. Stay focused. Don’t get cocky. Turning in a circle, Elona again searched for the riddle.

“C’mon, creepy stone room, work with me.” Elona muttered, feeling ridiculous this time, but talking to the door-riddle might’ve helped, she saw no reason not to try it this time.

Not immediately, anyway. A strange rushing noise sounded faintly in the distance, and Elona tilted her head in confusion, lifting her ear to try and catch it. Beside her, Sionn’s ears were twitching and rotating like crazy, and he’d lost most of his color.

“Sionn-” The noise reached her seconds before it burst from what were apparently holes in the ceiling.

Water began to flow from the spaces she’d observed earlier, cascading down the walls and hitting the floor with a force built from the fall. The water wasn’t flooding in uncontrollably, there was a distinct pace to it, and Elona eyed the spouts, attempting to gauge how much time they had even as the water rushed against her legs in a mockery of waves. She had to figure out where the riddle was, and the answer, before the room flooded. A swift kick of regret surged up her throat, and Elona wished, fleetingly, that she’d perhaps shoved Sionn out of the room. The water couldn’t hurt her, she’d discovered long ago that she could somehow breath in it, but Sionn… She’d just rescued him from nearly drowning, and now here she was, shoving him back into it.


~~*~~~*~~~*~~



DP is a slightly odd one: What does Elona try first to find the riddle?


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 17, 2015 12:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

OOO! Intensity! I LOVE the riddle game. Very original, and I love that it's not just a series of doors and riddles. I like that the stakes go up with each riddle passed. I also love the budding relationship with Sionn. I love that he's so fantastically comfortable with her, and she's having to try SO HARD to get used to the fact that someone is comfortable with her. It's precious. He's precious. It's just perfectly wonderful.

For the DP, this place responds to her--to whatever she is. Water causes her to transform, so maybe that's what the chamber wants. I'm going to say she lays down and tries to transform fully as quickly as possible...while Sionn probably runs around the chamber searching for a door. XD
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 17, 2015 8:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

RIDDLES HUZZAH
Oh goodness gracious this is a stressful DP. I imagine she'd panic a bit, and try touching every part of the room. Maybe there's another trigger or something? Which, like Andy suggested, might only trigger when she's transformed? I don't think she'd just lay down though, seeing Sionn in danger like this.
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 18, 2015 5:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oooooo! I love riddles, have I mentioned that? LOVE THEM!

I like the idea of her having to figure out the "riddle" to finding the riddle too, clever. I really like this chapter. ^.^

DP... maybe try talking some more? Maybe she needs to find the right question or phrase. *shrug*
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 18, 2015 12:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

hmmm...im thinking a little freaking out should be normal...

but also, she can mysteriously read the writing, so thistemple has something to do with her and stuff. maybe with that logic, she'll eventually opt to transform quicker?
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 18, 2015 12:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Great suggestions so far guys! Just waiting on Adryrn and Sapph at this point.
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 18, 2015 1:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Let me start with a "You just love to make us panic a bit don't you?"

Alright, I absolutely loved the fact that Elona was in a bit of a mental battle with herself at the beginning. It was nice to see that she had to kind of talk herself into going inside - with Sionn's help of wanting to go in of course. I also adored her honesty with him about not liking the idea of it.

I LOVE RIDDLES. LOVE THEM. Does that mean I'm any good at them? Not really, haha. But I do love them and I smiled when Sionn figured it out and hinted at what it was to Elona. (Can I also say I loved the line the Sionn said he thinks of words backwards, cause I found that adorable~) I actually figured that riddle out, so I surprised myself! (I didn't scroll down or read any further until I thought I had the answer myself haha!)

AND THEN YOU HAD TO MAKE THE ROOM START FILLING UP WITH WATER. WAS ONE SIONN ALMOST DEATH NOT ENOUGH FOR YOU? Enough capitals for now, you may see them again later. I had a feeling something like that was about to happen as you went to describe the room, and when Sionn's ears twitched and he got pale I yelled "NO" at my computer screen. Many, many times.

Alright, for the DP: I actually agree with Phan - and to a degree Andy - on this one. I get the feeling that she has to be transformed, the water filling the room is clearly screaming that out - and as she can only read the writing I'm going to assume that this is like a test for her or something. I don't think she'd lay down though, not with how you wrote that last line. I think she'd be trying to stay calm, but in a hurried fashion trying to find these words. TOUCH EVERY WALL AND STONE ELONA.
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 19, 2015 6:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

My surmising leads to a conclusion that they can get the solution of the riddle to the riddle by getting a bird's eye view of the room.

Alas, I don't know what to do, to wait or to look at the floor.

I say, let her look at the floor, the layout of the room against the floor must lead to a hint of some kind. Very Happy She'll get the bird's eye view eventually. She needs info now, so check the floor and walls. ^w^

Quite an intense chapter at the end. I feel like she's Indiana Elona now, with her trusty sidekick Sionn le chico. xD
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 19, 2015 9:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Awesome new chapter, Noni! And quite the decision you've left us with. I have a few ideas for the dp...the water could reveal a pattern on the floor that only appears when wet (much like Elona's true appearance only shines when she's wet) so Elona could check for a now unveiled riddle on the floor OR like Andy said, maybe the secret is her being totally transformed, and once she is she has to try talking to the room while completely submerged in the water. Here's hoping Sionn doesn't panic in the meantime XD
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2015 12:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think this is probably my favorite chapter so far 8D. I really love how closely you follow Elona's emotional process/thoughts---for me at least, it really helps me take on her point of view. I thought the foreshadowing (Elona pondering pushing Sionn back through the door) and Sionn's reaction to the room filling were also well-placed. Did not see the flooding room coming at all, but it totally makes sense/makes it even more obvious that whatever this place is, it was made with beings like Elona in mind and contains things that are only meant for them. With that in mind, I have to wonder if the way out will only be revealed once the room is filled with water o__o. In which case, Elona certainly has her work cut out for her XD.

My guess is the riddle is on the ceiling somewhere. I suspect that must also be where the way out is, and it's probably not visible unless you get closer to the ceiling (which Elona could do by waiting for the room to fill and swimming, but which may not cut it for Sionn XD). If that's the case, I'd say they should get to the far end of the room and stay there, then focus on keeping Sionn's head above the water until they can get a better view of the ceiling (or figure out what they're NOT seeing, if that's what's going on). Sionn sitting on Elona's shoulders (if she can support his weight? I was thinking of him as shorter than her, but now I'm at equal height. She'll probably be able to once the room's filled with enough water either way, at least) to get a better view of the ceiling and keep his head above the water as the room fills seems like a good idea to start out with. Checking out the floor while the water's still low can't hurt either, as long as the room isn't filling up too fast.
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2015 10:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

New poll is up! It will be closing my Wednesday morning (I'll post a 24 hour notice for you different-time-zoners). Vote while you can! and drag everyone else into voting too!
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 24, 2015 9:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just a heads up guys, the poll is only going to be up for 24 more hours!
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 3:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

How does Elona try to find the riddle?
Try to lay down and transform fully.
0% [ 0 ]

Run around the room and touch everything.
0% [ 0 ]

Talk while submergded in water.
14% [ 1 ]

Try talking more.
14% [ 1 ]

Transform quickly.
42% [ 3 ]

Wait for the room to fill.
28% [ 2 ]

Total Votes : 7
Who Voted: Adryrn, Andolyn, Cyberworm, kkdestiny, Phantomfan, Sapphire_Rayne, themightyzan






Chapter Eight

At first, the mysterious ruins had seemed intriguing and curious, and Sionn had felt an odd responsibility to urge Elona inside. They were plainly for her somehow, or maybe her people, and he’d remembered her cracking voice as she sobbed about her ignorance of her race. She needed to do this, Sionn had thought. She needed it, and more than that, she needed to do it at her own pace, so Sionn hadn’t rushed her when they encountered the first door. He’d even deliberately tried to ensure she got to say the answer, even if he’d solved it first.

Now, Sionn was petrified. He’d heard the sound of water before. He’d grown up playing by the babbling brook, learning to hunt by the roar of the waterfall. This forest he called home had rivers criss-crossing all throughout it, and he’d never before been scared of water’s soft, churning rumble. Not even when he had been drowning in the river. That had been quiet, almost peaceful. Now, as the water cascaded towards them, hitting his shins in repeated waves that threatened to knock him off his feet, all Sionn could hear was the slap of water on stone all around him. It reverberated in the room, in his ears, as he felt the water begin to seep into his boots.

Taking a deep breath, Sionn focused on Elona. She had gone very still, and lifted the torch up high. Watching as she turned with careful, deliberate steps, Sionn attempted to wet his dry mouth. I have to say something to reassure her we’ll get out of this. Or should I try to help find the riddle? But it won’t react to me, only to her. What should I do? Sionn was ready to reach up and pull his hair out when he heard Elona’s voice, the already familiar husky tones breaking through the waters noise.

“Sionn. Hold the torch.”

There was a whoosh as she thrust it towards him, and Sionn’s eyes went wide as he tentatively reached out for it. Using both hands, Sionn held tightly onto it and looked back up at Elona. She had closed her eyes and lifted her chin, and her hands were fisted at her sides. She’s come to some sort of a conclusion, Sionn wondered, And she doesn’t look happy with it. Did she find the riddle? Sionn’s gaze never left her as Elona walked forward, towards the spouts of water. His eyes widening, Sionn nearly dropped the torch. Is she…?

Elona reached the wall where the water was sliding down, and cupped her hands in front of her. Raising them above her head, she angled them just so and thrust them quickly into the water, sending it cascading over her head. It hit her and sent the clear liquid down her face, leaving the vivid blue-greens where it went. Sionn could see the scales glow when the water was over them, only to lose some luster when the water shifted. By the time Elona had lowered her hands, she was completely transformed, and stood staring at the wall a moment. She looks almost angry at it…

Sionn, noticing the light begin to falter, lifted the torch as he had seen Elona do earlier. The water was just past his knees now, and Sionn shivered at the cold touch. Yet another difference between this and the river, the water lapping at his legs now felt as chilled as a corpse in winter. Shaking his head away from those thoughts, Sionn lifted his tail higher, hoping to avoid it getting wet as long as possible.

“Elona?” Sionn wasn’t sure what he was asking, but her name slipped out unbidden anyhow.

“Sionn.” She moved away from the wall, turning towards him and smiling softly. Her eyes held fierce determination, rather than a humor to match her lips. “If the water gets high enough, I want you to get on my shoulders.”

“What? But you’ll-”

“Be able to support your weight under the water, don’t worry.”

“But how long can you hold your breath?”

Elona looked shocked, and then she laughed. The humor was genuine, and burst forth almost awkwardly, light she hadn’t expected to be laughing. Sionn attempted to scowl, though he was aware it was probably closer to a pout, his feelings almost hurt.

“Sionn. I’m sorry. It’s just… I thought… It’s odd.” Elona shook her head, as if she was trying to deny what she was thinking. “We’ve barely known each other a day, and yet, I instantly felt like you knew. I can breathe underwater.” She glanced down at the rapidly filling room, and Sionn realized it was already to his thighs. “We need to find that riddle.”

Her voice had lost any trace of mirth, and Sionn gave a nod. His arms began to shake from holding up the torch, and as the water rose to his waist, Sionn gave up on his tail and let it completely submerge itself in the water. Instantly, he felt infinitely worse. Believe in Elona. It was a reminder he didn’t need, but he told it to himself anyway. She wouldn’t let him come to harm. She was currently walking the perimeter, touching everything she could reach and mumbling under her breath. He couldn’t make out all the words, but it sounded vaguely like she was threatening the rooms very being. Sionn closed his eyes a moment, choosing to listen and focus on her voice.

It was deeper than many of the female humans voices he’d heard, and had a husky rumbling to it, like it was a tool that went often unused, but there was a lilt to the words. It was as if each word were a dear friend, and she was giving it a hug as she borrowed it. As she got more agitated with their circumstances, he could hear her voice get higher, uncomfortably strained, and the lilt was lost. The words were just words, now, and Sionn opened his eyes, sad that the calming music of her voice had been lost. She’s frightened too. Sionn wasn’t surprised, but it was still disheartening.

It was when Sionn glanced down at the water level- which had reached his chest- that he noticed something on the opposite wall. A glimmer, just beneath the water's edge. Moving the torch closer, Sionn furrowed his eyebrows as it vanished. Maybe… Without taking the time to think himself out of it, Sionn thrust the torch into the water. It gave one quick gasp of a hiss, as shocked to be dying out as Sionn was that he’d done that.

Instantly, the room was dark. The only light that Sionn could make out was the faint glow of Elona’s scales. Blinking as his eyes adjusted, Sionn heard sloshing as Elona fought through the water to his side. Under the water, Sionn squeezed the charred stick that had been the torch, and waited for the acrimonious tone she’d surely take. Instead, he felt her hands softly touch his face and flutter away, as if scared of hurting him.

“What is it? Are you alright?”

“I-” His throat seized. What have I done? How are we ever going to read it now? “I did that on purpose. I thought I saw something glowing in the water.” Sionn squeezed his eyes shut, braced for her to shun or scold.

“Really?” Sionn felt her move away, but her hand had rested softly on his shoulder, “You’re right!”

“What?”

When Sionn opened his eyes, Elona’s glow had moved to the wall he’d been staring at, the one to the left of the door they had entered. Where he had seen a sliver of glowing there now was a full line of the swirls that had been on the two doors. In the torchlight the light had been faint, but now they glittered beneath the water. Elona’s glow, too, was getting more luminescent. I didn’t mess it all up? Sionn felt relief bloom in his chest, only to squeeze into panic as the water reached his neck.

“E-Elona?”

“It says ‘Hard enough to crack rocks’, what could that mean?”

“Elona.” Sionn put a little more force into his quivering voice, standing on his tip toes to gain a little more leverage against the water. “The water…”

Sionn shifted towards her, his earlier misgivings about using her to stay above the water dismissed with his fright. He could feel the water in his nose and ears, feel his lungs begin to labor as if they were already fighting the water. It was the river all over again, and yet worse, and now, he could no longer force his mind away with inane distractions. Elona turned away from the riddle, and, he watched her hesitate for a moment. Before Sionn’s brain could run away from him, though, she had reached out and pulled him into a heartbreakingly gentle hug. Sionn could barely feel the pressure of her arms against his back, but his head tucked naturally into the crook of her neck. Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, Sionn felt himself calm down, her soothing scent drowning out the smell of old water and moss covered stones.

“I will get you out of this, Sionn. I promise.” She took a deep breath, and Sionn felt it against him. “Now, get on my shoulders.”

“But the water isn’t high enough-”

“I’m stronger than I look, Sionn.”

He had opened his mouth to argue again when Elona bent her knees and ducked into the water. He couldn’t see her, but felt her crouching underneath him. I’m stockier than her, Sionn fretted. I may be shorter, but there’s no way she can- woah! Elona had wrapped her arms around his legs, and with one push to her feet, he was seated on her shoulders. Her hands rested on his shins, holding him in place. The waters had reached her chin now, and Sionn felt them swirling around his thighs. The air clung desperately to his wet clothes, sucking away any remaining heat he’d had in his body. Trying his best not to shiver, Sionn glanced down at Elona. She was staring at the line of sc- lines? The raising of the water level had revealed another line of swirls. Or half of one, anyway.

“Try splashing it?” Sionn suggested uncertainly.

Elona did as he said though, letting go of one of his legs to reach forward and try to cause the wave of water to reveal the rest of the puzzle. It did nothing, though, and Sionn had a sinking realization. The riddle wouldn’t reveal itself until it was good and ready- and covered completely by the water in the room. With a renewed fear, Sionn reached above him, trying to figure out where the ceiling ended. One hands-length above his head, the room ended. They had very little time, and it all depended on how much of the riddle was left to reveal.

“‘Light enough to caress the sky,’” Elona’s voice was muffled, and he felt her head press into his belly as she lifted her chin to speak above the water. “ ‘Light enough to caress the sky,’ and ‘Hard enough to crack rocks.’ Think that’s it? Or is there more?”

“Elona, how are you going to speak when the water gets higher?”

“... I won’t. I’ll have to solve this riddle on my own.”

“But… how will you say the answer?” Sionn knew the answer, and selfishly dreaded it. *

“I’ll… Have to drop you and swim to the top. Which means I have to solve it before we run out of air to speak into, not just before you…” Her voice trailed off, and Sionn merely nodded, even if she couldn’t possibly see him in the dark.

The next moments stretched on, achingly, and for a tense moment, Sionn wondered if he should perhaps tell her now. He might never get another chance. But… I can’t distract her. Sighing, and shivering now despite his attempts otherwise, Sionn felt the water slip up past his waist again, and knew Elona’s head was beneath the water now. Softly, so quietly that the roaring would have covered it anyway, Sionn whispered into the dark.

Wordlessly, Sionn watched the third line of the riddle appear. Staring until his vision began to blur, Sionn willed himself to gain the ability to read. It failed, and Sionn simply reached into the water, his hand seeking out some connection to Elona. The swirling water wrapped some strands of her hair around his hand, and Sionn gently caught them between his fingers. He had to believe in her, but that didn’t mean he didn’t have to be scared. The water rose higher, and another line appeared. Elona shifted beneath him, and Sionn braced for the drop into water, but it didn’t come. Oh. That must be all of the riddle, but she hasn’t solved it yet.

The tension of sitting, waiting as the water got higher and higher, unable to communicate with Elona and help her, began to get to Sionn. Having to be braced to be dropped into the water, having it all rush up at him, at any given second, wasn’t helping. He managed to stifle any panic, though, through sheer determination and blind belief in Elona. Until the water reached his chin. Then, childishly almost, he began to poke Elona’s head. She swatted his hand away, and Sionn gasped in indignation.

That was the exact moment that the water rushed up to greet him. For a split second, Sionn thought she had dropped him out of irritation, that she’d finally had enough of him. Sanity returned as the air left his lungs, though, and he felt her kick his leg as she swam to the surface. For a second, nothing changed, and Sionn didn’t know what to think, to do. His feet found the floor, the rocks slippery beneath his boots. Attempting to push to his feet, Sionn searched for Elona’s glow, watching as a chunk of the ceiling fell out, landing into the water with a splash that Sionn felt the recoil through the water. A bright light filtered through the water from the opening. Pushing off the bottom, Sionn flailed his limbs in a sad imitation of the movements he had seen Elona do.

Just as he’d thought of her, she appeared, her arms wrapping around his belly. She held him from behind, lugging him the short distance to the surface. Once they’d gotten his face in the inches of space left with air, he dragged a mouthful of breath into his lungs. At the same time, Elona shoved him towards the opening now in the ceiling, pushing on him. Grasping at the edge, Sionn pulled himself up. The water made it tricky, and the stone almost slipped from his grasp several times, but with shaky limbs, Sionn hauled himself into the next room. Stopping dead, Sionn looked around him in confusion, and then mild horror. Elona can’t come in here.

“Elona, wait-”

But Sionn was too late. Elona had followed him closely, and was kneeling on the ground next to him. As she began to lift her head, Sionn felt himself begin to pale. The walls and ceiling all around them were mirrored. No matter where Elona might look, she would be face to face with everything she had tried to avoid. Herself. As a monster.

~~*~~~*~~~*~~



DP:

What does Sionn do?
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 3:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Okay, this chapter was FANTASTIC. It was intense, it was unique, and I loved it.

I loved that Sionn was forced to rely on Elona fully. I loved that even though he was terrified, she was his constant that kept him grounded. The description you provided of the water was incredible. It really made it feel like this cold, oppressive force. LOVED it. The revealing of the riddle was fantastic, and...and...and...

THE HUUUUG!!!! AWW GOD THE HUG! That was precious. The fact that one hug from her was all it took to calm him was just ...awwwww!!!


Okay, for the DP. She's already in the room, so it's either push her back in the water, do nothing, or somehow keep her from seeing. I'm going to say we go with the latter. Pull her close, grab her eyes, and keep her from seeing the mirrors. Sionn should explain to her what's around them and let her decide whether or not she's ready to see that. If she's not ready, she's safe in his arms. Maybe she'll find the strength she needs there to look. Wink
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 27, 2015 10:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Once again, your attention to detail was a pleasure to read =D. I'm not sure I would have thought of Sionn keeping his tail dry as long as he could and the difference it made once it was wet, but it really helped drive the feeling of being in a room filling with water home. As for what he should do---well, there doesn't seem to be much he CAN do about this other than be ready to comfort Elona (and I also really like how in spite of being in danger of drowning for the second time within 24 hours his first thought out of the water is STILL concern for Elona o__o). But then again, Sionn doesn't seem like the type to actually accept that, so instead of being ready to comfort her after she sees her reflection, I suspect he'll try to find a way to cover her eyes before she can see the mirrors.
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2015 9:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

hmm....really nice and suspenseful so far...can still only agree with covering her eyes.
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PostPosted: Mon Nov 30, 2015 8:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Uhhh... I posted a reply... but apparently not? I don't even know what's happening with me and your story anymore. Lol.

I loved this chapter!

And now to remember what I said before.... I don't think he should just grab her and cover her eyes, maybe instead he tells her not to look around, or close her eyes. And then explain things.

*shrug* I'm not a big grab someone's face person. Lol.
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PostPosted: Mon Nov 30, 2015 10:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alright guys, waited as long as I could bring myself too, poll is up! It's going to close sometime tomorrow, but as I don't know when I'll be at the computer, I can't promise when. I'll post an hour-countdown on fb, so keep an eye out!
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2015 4:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Poll results:
Elona is about to see herself surrounded by mirrors, what does Sionn do?
Push her back into the water.
20% [ 1 ]
Pull her close, covering her eyes, and explain.
60% [ 3 ]
Find a way to cover her eyes.
0% [ 0 ]
Tell her to close her eyes.
20% [ 1 ]
Total Votes : 5
Who Voted: Andolyn, kkdestiny, Novelest_Ninjagirl, Sapphire_Rayne, themightyzan




Chapter Nine


As Elona felt the water slip over her head, she stared intently at gradually appearing riddle. Light enough to caress the sky, She mused, and ‘Hard enough to crack rocks’. That couldn’t be all of it, yet still Elona struggled to wrap her mind around it. She had to. The weight of Sionn above her was a literal reminder of the responsibility she had on her shoulders. She had to keep him alive, and to do that, she had to solve this riddle the instant it fully appeared. The chill of the water faded from her mind as she focused on the glowing script.

The feeling of Sionn’s boot-clad legs beneath her hands grounded her, kept her mind from wandering. Circling the words through her brain over and over, Elona felt the seconds stretch out to a painful degree as the water rose and, finally, revealed the next line. For a second, she felt relief, but upon reading it, Elona was only more befuddled. ‘Gentle enough to soothe the skin’. Frustration and anger threatened to overwhelm Elona, and she ground her teeth together. A whisper of sensation distracted her, and Elona spared the briefest of moments to figure out what it was. Sionn had wrapped some of her hair around his fingers. The connection calmed her, reminded her that there would be plenty of time to rage at the riddles later, if she could just focus enough to solve them now.

The water had advanced further into the room during her distraction, and Elona watched in rapt attention as another piece of the riddle began to glow. As she read it, Elona became sure- she had all of the riddle now. Unbidden, her spine straightened in determination. She had all of the riddle, that must mean she only had so much time before… Shaking it off, Elona read the riddle through in her mind once more, this time in it’s completion.

Three lives have I.
Gentle enough to soothe the skin,
Light enough to caress the sky,
Hard enough to crack rocks.


Elona stared intently at the riddle, thinking of and dismissing options almost instantly. Touch? No, you can’t touch the sky. Words? No, words don’t crack rocks. How literally am I to take this? How much of it is word play? The questions burst into her brain, distracting her from her goal, and Elona felt her brain spinning away. The intensity of the conundrum was pressing into her skull. For the first time in her memory, someone else’s life was completely dependent on her. It wasn’t just her now, and Elona was unsure she could handle it.

Elona shook those thoughts from her head, taking a deep breath- of sorts, she was unsure how exactly her breathing worked, but she seemed to get air from the water if she kept her mouth shut. Letting it out through her nose, Elona watched the soft stream of bubbles rise in front of her eyes. They widened in shock as something occurred to Elona. Gentle. Light. Hard. The room. It was so obvious- ow. Sionn was poking her head now, and Elona batted his hand away instantly. She had to be sure, who knew the repercussions for saying the wrong thing. One last reread of the riddle, though, and Elona was sure she had it.

Now came the truly difficult part. Closing her eyes, Elona let go of Sionn’s legs and shifted forward. She felt him sink behind her, but Elona was already kicking her legs, pushing to the surface as swiftly as she could. How much air was left? So focused on swimming to the surface, Elona was there before she realized, and she headbutted the ceiling. An exclamation of pain wasted precious seconds, and before she could even draw in another breath, Elona forced out the words on the wisps of air she’d had left.

“Water! The answer is water!”

Without waiting for the room to react, Elona was turning back towards where she’d dropped Sionn, about to dive down when the center of the ceiling fell out. The luminous opening it left was ignored, though, as quick movements of her arms forced the water back over her head. The light soaked through the water, providing just enough clarity that Elona could find Sionn and wrap her arms around him. Kicking with all her force, now, Elona dragged them towards the surface. How long could he hold his breath?

The sound of Sionn taking some gasping breaths was perhaps the sweetest sound Elona had heard. Now to get him out of this water. The water seemed old, stagnant, like it had been sitting in some reservoir, waiting solely for this purpose, for years, maybe decades. It couldn’t be healthy for them to stay in it. As Elona pushed him up into the next room, Elona spared a glance back down at the room that had almost claimed Sionn’s life. There, Elona swore something to herself. She would do everything in her power to see that Sionn never had to experience the sensation of drowning again, not so long as he allowed her by his side.

Shifting her attention back towards the opening, Elona reached up, grasping the edge and heaving herself towards it.The water that clung to her clothes made her seem heavier than normal, and between that and the sheer mental effort the riddle had taken, when Elona finally hauled herself into the next room, she paused. Closing her eyes and bowing her head, Elona took a few breaths. Realizing Sionn had said something that she hadn’t heard, Elona started to lift her head.

“What was tha-”

His hands had been startlingly rough as they grabbed her arms and hoisted her into his arms, and Elona was shocked to find her face pressed into the wet red leather of his vest. His hands instantly gentled, and one of them rested on the back of her head. She angled her face so the could breath- she did still need to breath, even if water didn’t hinder her in that regard- but his grip kept her eyes firmly against his chest. At first, she thought Sionn was craving comfort after nearly drowning for the second time in as many days, but that didn’t add up. Surely he’d have wanted her arms around him if that were the case, but instead it was his grip holding her squarely in place.

“Sionn…?”

“The room.. It's… I…” His voice was strained, like he’d swallowed a frog and was trying to talk around it. “Just… just stay still a moment. Or, maybe, until you’re dried off?”

“Sionn?” Her voice held an edge of warning now. Whatever he was trying to avoid saying, he no doubt had a good reason, but she was going to hear it. Especially if it meant she had to stay in this half-kneeling half-crouched position.

“The room is covered in mirrors.” Sionn’s voice was soft, almost guilty. “And… And you’re still… I think it’s beautiful, but I was worried that… maybe you… didn’t?”

“Oh.”

Elona’s limbs went weak, and she unconsciously pressed her face into Sionn’s chest. So, he’d been trying to protect her from seeing herself. It had been some time since she’d seen herself. It was different seeing pieces of herself change as she bathed, almost surreal, like she was inhabiting someone else’s body. Now, if she shifted away, it’d be real. On all sides, she’d see who she was. Who I am… That was the question, wasn’t it? Elona was a hunter, a woman, someone who’s skin scaled at the touch of water. She knew those things. She was someone who had somehow attracted the companionship, perhaps even the friendship, of the man who was currently hiding her from everything she was. Whatever it was she was, it had allowed her to save him, both in the river, and just now. No matter that she had gotten him into both troubles, if she’d been human… Sionn would be dead.

Slowly, almost wishing she had made a different decision, Elona pulled her face away from Sionn. This time, he didn’t fight it. His hand allowed itself to be moved away, his fingers lingering in her hair. At first, all she saw was Sionn. His hair, darkened by the water, was sticking to his ears and spikeing out in little tufts. Water was even still dripping off, landing in little patters on his shoulders and sliding down to join the pool of it below them. His eyes, though, were wide amber-orange pools, staring at her like he expected her to shatter at the slightest touch.

She’d spent every waking second being strong, learning and adapting to survive in this world she knew nothing about and had no one in. Denying every weakness until it ceased to exist, Elona had come to suppress her vulnerability until she no longer believed she had any. Those eyes, though, ripped her clean to the core. He anticipated, expected even, her breaking down, and was prepared to be there. His instant acceptance of the weakness of emotion she rarely allowed herself was what gave her the courage, the strength, to turn and look into the wall to her left.

Her navy blue hair was slick from the water, tangled around her face. The face was smooth, the blue-green already beginning to fade, and the scales were beginning to vanish. Blinking, Elona stared deeply into the image. For the first time, she didn’t see the monstrousness. She didn’t picture the screaming faces, but Sionn’s smile. Maybe I’m not… so bad? Pushing to her feet, ignoring the slight wobble in her legs, Elona glanced around with resolve.

“Sionn, let’s find the next riddle.”

The reflections fed into each other, and Elona watched as Sionn pushed to his feet. He began to wring out the moisture trapped in his tail, and Elona watched as the water dripped onto the stone floor that had been the imposing ceiling from their previous trial. Hoping that there wasn’t some secret danger to this room as well, Elona attempted to speak to the mirrors.

“Well, creepy and mildly murderous tunnel place, where’s our next riddle? Or at the very least the next door.”

Placing her hands on her hips and glaring at herself in the mirrors for a moment, Elona sighed and turned back towards Sionn. If the room wouldn’t reveal the riddle, she had to begin thinking about their escape plans. The room they’d left was filled with water, if she could break the door, would the force of the water through the tunnel be enough to force open the giant stone doors at the entrance? Turning back to the hole to gauge how much water she had to work with, Elona let out an aggravated sigh.

“It’s right here, we missed it.”

There was a etching into each edge of the square, and Elona walked around it until she found the one she believed to be the beginning. They weren’t glowing, like all the others, until Elona bent down and touched them. She wasn’t sure why she did, perhaps for good luck. Pushing to her feet again, Elona looped her thumbs into her waterlogged belt.

“‘ You can see nothing else’,” Elona stepped around to the next edge. “ ‘When you look in my face’,” Another step. “‘I will look you in the eye’,” A final step. “‘And I will never lie.’ Well what could that be?”

Though she had solved the last puzzle on her own, and could no doubt solve this one, Elona was immensely relieved to hear Sionn humming in thought behind her. Peering out of the side of her eye, Elona watched him through the mirrors. He had cupped his chin in his hand, bracing the free one on his elbow, and was rocking back and forth. Behind him, his tail was shaking rhythmically, either in excitement or an urge to get dry. It was such a relaxed picture, after the horrors they’d just been through, that Elona giggled softly. Belatedly, she made an attempt to muffle it with her hand, but Sionn had already stepped around into her vision.

“What?” Sionn tilted his head, and his ears swiveled, as if to catch the joke bouncing off the walls. “Something funny about the riddle?”

“No, no, it was just your… reflection.”

Elona’s statement dwindled as understanding struck her. She turned back to the nearest mirrored wall, stepping towards it. Almost hesitantly, Elona lifted her hand and pressed the palm into the mirror. “‘You see nothing else when you look in my face,” Elona murmured, watching the words roll off her lips. “‘I will look you in the eye, and I will never lie’.” Staring deep into her own sage green eyes, Elona’s lips twitched in the echo of a smirk. “Room, you’re giving us far too many hints. Thanks. The answer is ‘reflection’. My reflection, specifically.”

A moment passed, as had become the norm, before anything happened. It almost felt as if the ruins were taking a moment to deliberate over her answer before responding. There was a loud creaking, before the mirror-wall Elona had her hand pressed against began to very slowly pull backwards. It pulled open, similar to a door, revealing a simple square room, until the mirror wall had pressed itself against the right side of the room behind it. The other two walls and the ceiling were made of smooth stone slabs, and the ground appeared to be of tightly packed dirt. Pausing before she stepped forward, Elona glanced back at Sionn.

He grinned, and stepped forward, automatically reaching for her hand. Elona felt her breath catch in her throat for just a moment at the gesture, but she didn’t hesitate to wrap her fingers up in his grip. Holding each other's hands, they stepped into the room. Instantly, the riddle appeared on the wall directly in front of them, the giant incandescent words taking up the whole walls space. Elona gripped Sionn’s hand more tightly as she read it aloud.

“‘I have rivers without water,
Forests without trees,
Mountains without rocks
Towns without houses.
What am I?’”

“What could that be?” Sionn’s voice was perplexed, and Elona tore her gaze away from the words to look at him. “The moon?”

“No,” Elona chuckled softly. “It’s a map.”

“A map?”
Elona was about to explain what a map was, but the ruins were already reacting to her answer. For a moment, the entire floor beneath her shook, throwing her and Sionn off their feet and to the ground. There was no respite when the floor stopping, however, for at that moment the blinding light had returned, this time from the riddle on the wall, rather than the words on the door. The ringing returned, only Elona felt a faint noise behind it, almost… almost like a voice. It slipped away as quickly as she had noticed it, and as the light faded, Elona was convinced it had been no more than her overstressed imagination. Lifting her head, Elona looked at Sionn. However, he was staring open mouthed up at the wall the riddle had been on.

“Elona… is that a map?”

Turning her head regretfully away from Sionn, Elona turned to study the wall. On it was a crude but detailed drawing. Pushing to her feet, and pausing to help Sionn up as well, Elona advanced towards it. The markings were basic, swirls for trees and little arrows for mountains. It could have been drawn by a child, or perhaps for one. Still, there was a star sitting not to far from a line she assumed to be a river, surrounded by trees. The markings all matched up with her knowledge of the area.

“That star,” She reached up to point to it. “That’s definitely where we are.”

Sionn pointed towards what was presumably a town, based on the boxes cluttered together, sitting between two rivers and near a mountain pass. Elona felt a shiver of dread as she saw the similar star that Sionn had noticed. Another set of ruins? Filled with more dangerous riddles? Near that town? Elona closed her eyes, willing the decision she’d have to make away for at least another moment. But wait. Elona’s eyes opened, and she glanced around her. How do we get out?

“This must be where we have to go next.” Sionn’s voice, innocent and calm, broke through her thoughts, but any answer she might’ve given him was interrupted.

The mirrored wall to their right began to groan and creak, and Eloan watched as it slid forward, vanishing into some secret cavity in the wall designed specifically for it. Behind it lay what it had been hiding, not a wall at all, but a set of stairs. They were made of stone, and beginning to crumble and moss over, but at first glance, they seemed sturdy enough. It seemed the ruins had answered Elona’s question.


~~*~~~*~~~*~~


DP: Well? What do they do?
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2015 4:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

SO GOOD!!!

Him calming her was precious. He wasn't even trying. I LOVED when he held her. That was just heart-melting. The bit about him not expecting her to hide her weakness ...just aww!!! And the innocence that he shows is adorable. She's all "MORE DANGER" and he's just like, "Hey! That's where we go next!" hahaha! I love it.

For the DP, let's have them make a copy of the map if either of them is able...either that or as soon as they get outside, Sionn bends down & starts drawing it on the ground from memory just to solidify it in his mind.

Great chapter!
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 03, 2015 4:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I love how you went back a little bit so we could see what was going on in Elona's head during the figuring out of the riddle. I'd also like to shamefully admit I had no idea that the answer was water (I'm smart just not amazing at riddles, cut me some slack!) Also, I love Sionn. Have I told you how much I love the fox? No, well I love him. If I could steal him right out of the story I would!!

I love the fact that when she's pulled against Sionn she thinks at first that maybe he was seeking comfort, before actually thinking about it and getting the confirmation from Sionn that it's really him trying to protect her. AND WHEN HE SAYS HE THINKS SHE'S BEAUTIFUL WHILE SCALED JUST OHMIGOSH. I reread it twice to make sure I read it right. And then the fact that he was so ready to comfort her if she broke, and was just totally set on being there if she needed him - I will die from how sweet he is one day, I swear it.

AND SHE'S STARTING TO SEE THAT MAYBE SHE ISN'T SO HORRIFYING BECAUSE OF HIM. JUST AW. kdfsnvkhbdf. Okay, enough with that, haha! This line here:
Quote:
“Well, creepy and mildly murderous tunnel place, where’s our next riddle? Or at the very least the next door.”

It made me laugh. Maybe it's the way she is addressing the ruins that made it funny to me, I'm not sure - but I did laugh.

I KNEW THE ANSWER WAS HAD TO DO WITH REFLECTIONS. JUST YES. Ruins - 1, Sapph - 2! And then the room opens up ( Was I the only one who verbally 'squee'd at the hand holding?)and the new riddle is revealed. I have to admit, I thought the moon for a minute, but that wouldn't make much sense considering what the other answers have been. Secret, water, reflection - like, moon doesn't fit in that what-so-ever. Then it turns out to be map? Like alright. Ruins - 2, Sapph - 2. And then the actual map is revealed and that made much more sense.

A set of ruins near a town, that doesn't sound too good. To be honest, I'm rather scared for them. If they are anything like these ruins . . I just hope Sionn isn't caught in another death room. Yes, that is what I'm going to call them. Death rooms. I'm with Elona in feeling the dread there.

As for what they should do... Well, I kind of agree with Andy. I don't think there is anything to copy the map onto in the room, so try to memorize it before leaving. Maybe one of them memorize one half and the other goes to the other being? Less to remember, and they could draw it together in the dirt when they leave said ruins.
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 03, 2015 7:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm SO glad you narrowed in on that line of dialogue! Elona is stiffly polite to people, I wanted to show a little bit of her sass through her interactions with this temple/ruins place that she detests.

Also, I do like the phrase 'death rooms', as it's rather fitting towards what I was thinking. XD

Sionn's innocence is something I love, and I'm glad you guys are appreciating it.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 04, 2015 4:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good read, as usual.
The only thing I found odd,personally, was the timing where it was mentioned that the water felt old and stale. But, that is a preference and easily waved off.

I also like that sometimes you'll go back and cover some of Elona's thoughts, I feel like it's an important connection to make with the reader in this story...and Sion is as cute as ever. I felt suspended when he was expecting her to break,because I did too, and I smiled when she didnt because he thought she was beautful.

I like where the story is going Smile

The only thing I can think of is to remember the map, yes...but maybe if Elona knows the town that is on the map that the temple is close to...then she might just need to memorize how close, and how to get to the town in the first place.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 04, 2015 8:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I enjoy how quickly they've gotten to casually touching each other all the time (and your well-placed/described details, as usual). It's oddly comforting to read. As for what they should do next, it seems like there isn't much to do but take the stairs. I'm guessing Elona will remember where the other star is pretty easily given that she seems to have negative memories associated with the region it's in/near (which I can't WAIT to learn more about >D). I also feel like they kind of have to go check out the other star now, buttttt I can totally see Elona deciding not to, and Sionn respecting that even if he thinks she should (or is just curious). At the same time, with Elona's gradually increasing confidence and self-acceptance, perhaps she'll decide a change in approach is in order and intentionally seeking out another set of scary ruins that seem made for her is a great way to turn over that new leaf?
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 05, 2015 7:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Awwww, sorry it took me so long to catch up! Well, for what is next... I believe they should, obviously, go ahead. BUT, I also think one of them should sing a tune. Something soothing, familiar and old. I have a feeling that if the walls and the complex itself is reacting to words, having someone sing would do something. Like, perhaps illuminate the caverns more brightly, or they find a secret compartment in which grow some kind of foodstuffs? I dunno. Perhaps they just feel like it. Spice it up, backstory the world lore a bit! Very Happy

Excellent work so far. There'll be a love scene not far away from here. I can smell it.
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 06, 2015 2:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Poll officially up! Itll be up two or three days, so vote quickly!


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 07, 2015 8:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

24 hour heads up guys! Only two votes? C'mon, I know we're all busy, but we can do better than that! ^^
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 08, 2015 3:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

What do Sionn and Elona do?
Sing something. Just because.
42% [ 3 ]
Head up the stairs.
14% [ 1 ]
Memorize the map.
42% [ 3 ]
Total Votes : 7
Who Voted: Adryrn, Andolyn, Cyberworm, kkdestiny, Novelest_Ninjagirl, Phantomfan, Sapphire_Rayne

Tie this time, so I did both! (Do not judge my songwriting skills.)


Chapter Ten


As Sionn leisurely looked over the map, he became aware of Elona running her fingers over the individual markings, almost like she was trying to etch them into her brain. Keeping his head turned towards the wall, but watching her out of the corner of his eyes, Sionn was fascinated. Her gaze seemed to flick over it first from the town he’d pointed towards, and then radiate outwards. Once it had, presumably, covered all of the map, she seemed to shift to looking it up and down in a grid format. Watching her, Sionn noticed that she chewed on her bottom lip while concentrating. Covering his mouth to try and hide the bemused smile, Sionn turned to lean against the wall and watch the light emanating from the mirror room. He wasn’t sure where it came from, but it cast dancing shadows into the map room as it flickered.

Somehow, even though they were still technically deep within the earth inside a possibly malicious set of riddle-ruins, Sionn relaxed. Closing his eyes, Sionn felt a soft smile turn his lips. A contented sigh slipped through his lips first, then, enjoying the sound, Sionn began to hum softly. He wasn’t certain where he’d heard the tune. Perhaps a traveller whistling in the forest? Maybe someone sang as they rested by the riverside. A fox could hear and observe much of humanity without them noticing, if he was so inclined. Sionn had been, and the notes frequently flitted through his brain during idle moments.

At first, Sionn didn’t notice it. Then, gradually, it became louder, and Sionn realized Elona was humming along with him. Eyes popping open, he stamped down the beaming expression threatening to break his hum. Elona was still staring at the map, and Sionn realized she didn’t even notice that she was humming. Sionn felt a strange squeeze in his chest, and he reached up to lightly touch his fingertips to his heart. Or at least, where he thought his heart was in this form. As he stared at her, greedily drinking in the sight of her, she began to sing.


“The wind flies over the mountaintops
Like a bird upon the sky
The earth and the water
Kiss like long lost lovers together again
Pressed close and loathing each parting tide
Yet they’re all still less lucky than I

Yet they’re all less blessed than I.

The wind lifts a ladies skirts
Like a gentleman might wish to be
The earth and the flame
Meet and greet in a dance of sparks
Twisting quick despite any discouraging remarks
Yet they’re all still less lucky than me.

Yet they’re all less blessed me.

For you see
For you see
Better yet than wings to take you high
Or a lover to hold you close
To be as lucky as I
To be as blessed as me
They would need to have what only I do
They would need you. “

Sionn still couldn’t remember where he’d first heard the tune, but he knew he’d never forget hearing it now. He was sure his mouth was hanging open. For most of the song she’d remained still, staring at the map. Sionn wasn’t even sure when she’d realized she was singing, but at the end, she’d turned to look directly at him. While he was scared to read too much into it, his heart was beating faster than he could ever recall it doing. In the dim light, her sage green eyes almost seemed to glow, and Sionn found he couldn’t drag his own way. He’d begun to turn towards her when she blinked a few times, and turned her head quickly to the map. Snapping out of it, Sionn coughed gently, and straightened, adjusting his nearly-dry vest.

“Sh-should we, uh, head up?” Sionn hooked a finger towards the stairs, hoping the slight crack in his voice had been missed.

“Just one more moment.” Frowning, Elona began shuffling through her pack. “I wonder if it survived…”

A mild stab of guilt shocked him. It went straight through his gut, and he glanced away, unable to look at her. Whatever she was looking for, she’d have if she hadn’t allowed him to- Shaking his head, Sionn pushed away that line of thought. It doesn’t matter. She did allow me to come, this happened, and now- now we’re on a quest! One determined nod to himself, and Sionn was back to normal. Just in time for Elona to gently rest a hand on his shoulder. Her touch was still as light as a butterflies, and Sionn reached to grip her hand tightly. The shock on her face melted into a soft smile, and Sionn grinned brightly in response. We’re together. We’ll figure it out. He wasn’t sure entirely what ‘it’ was, but he was sure of that.

“My map survived, so just give me a moment to copy this down onto it.”

Sionn squinted in confusion at the cylinder she was holding. It was made of leather, and had an oilskin fabric on the top. It didn’t look anything like the map on the wall, what was she talking about? Tilting his head, Sionn released her hand. She popped the oilskin cap off, and Sionn realized it was a hollow tube. Carefully she slid a piece of rolled up paper out of the case, and unrolled it on the floor. Her little sound of triumph at seeing the unharmed map made Sionn laugh. Something so simple could make the deep, mysterious Elona elated? It was almost amusingly endearing. She upended the tube, shaking it a few times, and a roughened piece of charcoal, wrapped in a cloth, clattered out. Her hands were steady as she unwrapped part of the charcoal, holding the fabric that covered the rest as she drew in the little star on her map. I wonder why my family doesn’t use maps. They seem easy enough to follow. Linking his hands together behind his back, Sionn waited as Elona went through the efforts required to return the map to her bag.

“Alright, let’s get to the surface.”

“It’s going to be dark on the stairs, let me take the lead.” Sionn held his hand out for hers, his heart in his throat.

This time, she reached for his hand with minimal hesitation, and Sionn grinned at her. Affection from family had been common, but nothing compared to the gentle touch of Elona’s hand in his. Stepping onto the stairs, Sionn sent up a silent thanks to whatever had inspired him to try out humanity. Fingers and hands had proved useful for a multitude of things, but perhaps the most awe-inspiring was this.

They remained silent as they traversed up the stairs, save for the few times Sionn had to warn her of particularly dangerous steps. Sionn didn’t know why Elona remained quiet, chose not to dwell on it. Instead, he savoured her company. It hadn’t been very long, but the mood between them had changed, hadn’t it? It was completely different than the morning before, with her begrudgingly allowing his presence and him trying his best not to exist. He’d been content before to simply watch her, follow her, but now it meant so very much to him that they were moving together.

At the top of the stairs was another set of doors, set at an odd angle. They seemed to be seeping in from the outside, like they were slowly trying to lay down. These ones didn’t simply open at Elona’s touch, and Sionn was surprised at how heavy they were. It took both of them to simply get one door open high enough to fall open the rest of the way. Panting for breath, Sionn shot a grin at Elona, and lifted his arms to flex. She chuckled at him, and patted his arm as she passed, stepping up into the daylight.

The sun was beginning to set already, and Sionn watched, still a few steps down into the pit, as the reddish orange light shone on Elona. Breathlessness overtook him for a moment, before his lips twitched into a smile and he rushed after her. Now we make camp. Sionn was starting to learn the patterns humans fell into. As a fox, he’d probably have found an abandoned burrow- or forced someone out of theirs, if he went more for his father's style. Instead, they found a small break in the trees, and Elona started the fire. It was a special kind of magic, and she did it so effortlessly.

“Can you teach me?” Sionn poked his head towards the fire, only to be pushed back slightly by Elona.

“If you don’t set yourself on fire, sure. Shouldn’t this have been one of the things you were taught, though?”

“Language is easy to mimic, as are human motions. But the leader is the only one who knows how to start fire. It’s dangerous, you know. Draws notice.”

“Well, here. I do it this way.”

As Elona walked him through the process of rubbing the sticks together, Sionn found himself wondering why his father hadn’t taught more of them how to use fire. Surely the precautions could be taught just as easily, and how many times had they lost a relative or a kit to the cold? Putting perhaps more strength into the friction than he supposed, Sionn broke the sticks. Wordlessly, Elona handed him more and showed him again.

Later, they sat next to the fire and watched the glow. Sionn could tell Elona had been thinking about something, for she kept chewing on her lip, but he was waiting for her to bring it up on her own. Impatiently. His hands were balled up on his lap now, but he had been tapping on the ground next to him incessantly. Swishing his tail against the ground, Sionn tried to focus on that sensation, and not on the thoughtful girl next to him. He understood that, for whatever reason, Elona seemed to either act in an instant or spend ages thinking things through, but he was anxious to reassure her about whatever it was.

“Sionn?” Finally. “Do you know where your family is?”

“Wha-” Sionn felt a rush of panic, and gawked at her. “I-I can’t tell-”

“That’s not what I asked.” She frowned at him now, and Sionn rubbed at the back of his neck. “Do you know.”

“Well…” Sionn rubbed harder at the knot that had somehow appeared. “I. I guess I have some sort of idea where they should be this time of year.”

“I see.” She went quiet, her gaze going to the fire, and Sionn dropped his arm. Holding his breath, his lungs on fire, Sionn waited. “Go back to them.”

“What?” The air wooshed out of him in a painful rush. “I thought-”

“I won’t let you be put in danger again because of me!”

It burst forth, like she hadn’t meant to say it, and her eyes were screwed shut. Sionn’s mouth dropped open, and he reached for her instinctively. Pulling his hand back a moment, Sionn hesitated. This… This is good, right? Sionn practically pleaded with himself. It means she cares about your safety.That’s no surprise, right? Leaning forward, Sionn placed his hands on her arms. She had wrapped them around herself, and her eyes were still shut.

“Don’t you get it?!” Some measure of his desperation not to be cut out again slipped into his voice. “You’re the only reason I’m even alive!”

“The ruins-


“That’s not what I mean.” Sionn cut her off. He hadn’t meant to bring it up, but now that he had, she was going to know the truth. The whole truth. She deserved that.

“Then the river-”

“Not that either.”

She went silent a moment, but at least now she opened her eyes and raised them to him. The sparkling of moisture in the corner of her eyes answered a question Sionn hadn’t thought to ask. She’d been withdrawing to hide the tears. The only other time she’d broken down like this had been right after she’d hauled him out of the river, and her lifelong secret had been revealed. Just how painful was it for her to send him away? Touched, Sionn gently brushed some of her hair out of her face.

“Oh. Sionn, they wouldn’t have killed you if they caught you.”

“No! You saved me as a fox!” That wasn’t how he meant to say it, but the fact that she’d come to the wrong conclusion again caused a bubble of frustration. Frustration that what was the most important moment of his life- up until he’d met her again- hadn’t even made it into her memories.

“... What?” Her voice was as soft as the wind through the trees, and Sionn almost didn’t hear her.

“Last winter.” It was all coming out now. After this, who knows how her feelings towards him might change. But she was getting the truth. Now, rather than any later. “I was hungry. If I went back to my family, they’d have shared. They aren’t cruel. But then, they’d be hungry. We age differently from normal foxes, we still have kits to feed in the winter. So, I got reckless. And I approached a hunter.”

Her soft gasp could have been of remembrance or astonishment, but it was encouraging either way, and Sionn continued. Forcing his grip on her arms to ease, Sionn dropped his head. He couldn’t look her in the eye and tell this tale of his lowest moment.

“Fire has always fascinated me. Humans, too. So I know a few of the better places to make camp in the woods. I was going by one when I heard the fire, smelled the food. Against my better judgement, I went towards it. I…” His shoulders drooped, and he confessed in a softer voice, “I was convinced I was going to die either way. It might as well be quick, an arrow or sword from a frightened human seemed more appealing than hunger. But when I approached the fire, you were there.”

Elona’s hands surprised him. They rested on his shoulders, and then slipped over his back, dragging him towards her in a hug. His head was resting in the crook of her shoulder, now, and the position was awkward. There was a pain in his knee where it rested against the ground, but Sionn would sooner cut it off then move. He swallowed, trying to clear his throat of the emotion that was swelling it, and he pressed on with the rest of his story.

“You didn’t reach for the bow sitting by your feet. Or the arrows near your hip. Instead, you reached for your food. I thought perhaps you’d throw it and sprint away, and I was filled with bittersweet elation. Food, but at the cost of fear. Except, you didn’t. You tore off a piece of the deer you had been cooking, a large piece, and you gently placed it between us. When I edged close enough to eat it, you spoke to me.”

“I remember that fox.” Her voice interrupted him, with perhaps the sweetest words she could have said.


~~*~~~*~~~*~~


Giving you guys some power here: The dp is, Why does Elona remember that fox?
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 08, 2015 3:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ok, first of all, splendid writing. I didn't nitpick, but I didn't find a single error.

That said, I love this chapter perhaps the most. You are progressing nicely in your writing.

The story is progressing rather fast, in 10 chapters no less, but it's also a refreshing sight.

Alas, as for the DP...

I'm a silly guy. I say the fox ate and fell asleep in her lap afterwards.

Aye, fell asleep. A FOX. Shocker. Very Happy

Well, it could also be that the fox had an omen on it. Some meaningful mark in the form of a bald spot albino shape or limb.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 11, 2015 11:47 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alright. Time for my usual breakdown!

I adore that Sionn takes the time to just watch Elona and observe how she is. I think it's because I always love seeing guys watch their ladies when they don't notice it. . . that sounded a bit like I enjoy stalkers which is completely untrue . . hrm. That's the best wording I can come up with though, haha. Anyways, I also adore the together humming!

And then she sings! I don't know what you're talking about - I happened to enjoy the song! And the way Sionn reacts to it is lovely to read. Though, may I point out the glowing eyes and how the both seem to snap out of it? That leads me to believe that there is more to Elona than she seems to know, considering she snapped out of whatever that was as well (Or I'm assuming so from her blinking and turning back to the map). I'm loving the differences in their reactions to one another's touch. Sionn doesn't hesitate to grip her hand, and while she is surprised but gives a soft smile, he just beams! It's just so awesome to have the pleasure of reading.

And the confusion on the map container, I got a kick out of that. I also got a kick out of this line here :

Quote:
I wonder why my family doesn’t use maps. They seem easy enough to follow.


I suck at following maps, so I had to laugh at this. Maps are not my friends, and I will never see them as my friends.

AND SHE TOOK HIS HAND. THIS CAN'T BE ANY BETTER. Though, her being rather quiet is not comforting. And it had me confused, especially since they were chatting and getting better at the ' there's another person here ' situation. But the playful flexing, chuckling and arm pat made it up to me. And we've now learned something about Sionn's father - or at least his way of finding/making shelter anyways. And then we learn more about what is learned and what isn't so this is definitely progress I like.

AH! She speaks again! Though, I was a tiny bit troubled by her asking Sionn if he knew where his family was, and a little more troubled by the fact that he had an idea of where they might be. Might. As in, has no clue and is guessing. AND THEN SHE TELLS HIM TO GO BACK TO THEM. THIS IS NOT OKAY. GIVE ME BACK MY HEART YOU MEANIE.

I will not lie, I read through that dialogue so fast to see if my heart would break more, before reading it slowly and enjoying it. Elona's saved him quite a few times now, hasn't she? And then we find out the truth. That she had saved him as a fox. And my heart broke all over hearing that he was ready to die either way back then. AND SHE REMEMBERS HIM. YOU NONI, HAVE STOLEN MY HEART WITH THEM AND THIS STORY AND I DEMAND TO HAVE IT RETURNED TO ME.

So, as for the DP. . . I kind of agree with Cy. It does sound like him to eat and fall asleep in her lap. I'm always agreeing with other people. If I manage to think of something else though, I'll let you know! And I will be thinking, so yeah. Haha.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 11, 2015 7:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. I just do. They're fantastic. The slightly awkward sweetness is just precious. It did break my heart a little bit when she told him to go home...UGH FEELS.

Anyway, for the DP, I'm going to say that Sionn has a distinctive marking of some sort.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 11, 2015 7:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think my vote would be that

a) she thought he was going to run

b) she was incredibly depressed and he kept her company when she needed it most
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 11, 2015 8:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Aww. The last line of the song was super cute =D. I like that you put Sionn in an awkward position when Elona hugged him toward the end--it's not an obvious thing to think of (or at least, not as alluring as hugs that feel just right?), but it makes sense. As for the DP, my first reaction was that Elona remembered Sionn's fear, but on re-reading it, it seems like he'd accepted the impending doom. So knowing Elona, I'd say she must have been wallowing in loneliness and self-loathing that night and Sionn made her feel less repulsive by approaching her. To make it even worse, maybe the deer she shot hadn't been as afraid of her as it should have been and that was why she was able to kill it, and she also felt bad about that and felt like she was making up for it a bit by feeding Sionn (though I guess the deer being unafraid is a bit of a stretch since Sionn predicted someone would be where Elona was because other hunters had camped there. Eh.)
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 20, 2015 8:30 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Why does Elona temember that fox?
She was depressed and he brought comfort.
100%
100% [ 4 ]
She thought he was going to run.
0%
0% [ 0 ]
The fox had a distinctive mark.
0%
0% [ 0 ]
The fox fell asleep on her lap after eating.
0%
0% [ 0 ]
Total Votes : 4
Who Voted: Adryrn, Andolyn, Sapphire_Rayne, themightyzan

Chapter Eleven


“Tough winter for all of us, huh?”

Elona spoke softly, trying not to frighten away the creature scarfing down the chunk of meat. This poor fox looked as if he hadn’t eaten in days, perhaps weeks. His sunken expression only made his gaze, filled with a pathetic desperation, more intense. Between that and the fox being brave enough to approach her, Elona’s heart melted a smidgen. Tearing off another piece of the deer she had no appetite for, Elona set it down. The fox eyed her warily, it seemed, before moving a small step closer. The meat was gulped up greedily, and Elona gave an amused chuckle.

“I didn’t think my cooking was quite
that impressive.”

The smile felt odd, felt stiff. How long had it been, anyway? A deep loneliness had long since begun to seep into her bones, making them feel heavy and sore. Yet, the sight of brave fox, edging closer to her now, seemed to lighten that burden. This creature had every right to fear her, and yet he- if the fox was in fact a he- didn’t. She’d heard humans speak of trusting an animal’s instincts, so surely if this fox didn’t fear her, she wasn’t as monstrous as she believed? It was a risky thought to believe in, and Elona froze the seed of hope that had started to bloom within her chest. Hope was a dangerous drug, one she’d long since learned the lesson of.

One more hesitant step closer, and the fox nudged her hand. She gave a soft gasp, unused to the contact. His fur was slightly coarse, and one could tell the forest was his home from the dirt coating, but it was quite possibly the softest touch she’d ever felt. It didn’t compare to the brisk slaps and nudges that had been her teacher, it was gentle and sweet. There was an unspoken acceptance in the touch, even if the fox might not have intended one. In fact, it was easy enough to guess what he had intended.

“Still hungry, my friend?”

The endearment had never left her lips before, but it slipped off them as smoothly as the river swept over rocks. With her other hand, Elona reached out and tore more meat off of the spit. This time, she held it in her palm, and extended it towards the fox. She wasn’t sure why she did, perhaps she was craving more contact? Whatever her reasons for offering it in that way, the fox gingerly took it, this muzzle tickling against Elona’s palm. Elona felt the soft smile on her face ease into a natural expression of contentment. Whatever this feeling was- companionship, perhaps?- it was very nice. It was possible there were better words for it, but nice was all she could apply to it. Nice was rare enough for her, she didn’t need more than that. Wasn’t sure how to process anything more than that. Too much overindulgence in moments like this, and the lonely moments would only sting that much more.

Haltingly, Elona shifted her hand to the top of the foxes head and gave a pat. The fox seemed to peer up at her, an unfathomable expression in his swirling amber eyes, and Elona began to softly scratch behind it’s ear. His eyelids flickered down, and the fox rested its weight against her leg. Smiling still, Elona found herself speaking to the fox. Who else did she have to speak to, anyway? What reason was there not to? A lifetime of silence didn’t appeal to her, but neither did the thought of anyone knowing so much about her. Confiding in an animal might be the best sort of compromise with herself.

“Are you lonely too, my friend? You must be, to approach a hunter like me. Or hungry, at the very least. You sure lucked out, my friend. I must the only hunter in this forest with such a bleeding heart.”

His eyes opened, and he nuzzled his head against her leg. Taking it as encouragement, Elona continued.

“My friend, may I tell you a secret?”

Did the fox just nod? Choosing to believe it had, Elona leaned towards him, and confessed in a lowered voice,

“I don’t like to kill. I wish I was good at something less violent, but this is all I’ve got to feed myself.”

Elona heaved a sigh. It was tough to admit, even just to a hungry animal who likely couldn’t understand. She had tried many things, but with no one to teach her, she’d had to resort to the one thing she had any form of training in. The training had seemed a game when it begun, but that grizzly old man had loathed every second in her company. Shaking away those memories as best she could, Elona returned her gaze to the fox at her side.

“Thank you, my friend. It is nice to speak of it.”

There was much more to speak of, but even this animal didn’t deserve the burden of hearing all her woes and tribulations. In a natural, almost absent minded gesture, Elona continued to stroke the top of the fox’s head. The soft rustle of his fur against her hand was soothing. Her self-imposed isolation, which had been admittedly encouraged by the rare few who had seen her true side, had been encroached on for an evening. Tonight, even if it was merely a fox, Elona had a friend. Someone to watch the fire with her, who’s breathing filled the empty night. It was something she hadn’t realized would have such an effect, the sound of something other than her drawing air into it’s body to survive.

Through the night, Elona intermittently fed and pet the fox. She spoke a few more times, mostly of things without any importance. She spoke of how she prefered sunrises to sunsets, how her favorite food wasn’t deer, but fish. She even mentioned how much she envied the ladies she saw strolling about all decked out in be-glittering gems. The fox seemed to follow the sound of her voice, and from time to time it truly did seem it was nodding along. It was the closest to an honest conversation she’d ever come. When the fox refused the meat in her hand in favor of laying down and closing it’s eyes, Elona leaned down and softly kissed it’s head.

“You have been a very dear friend, thank you. I have never shot at a fox, and now I most certainly never will. Sleep, I shall watch you. In the morning...” Elona’s voice shriveled, and her throat closed. It was surprisingly painful to bid farewell to the fox. So she didn’t. She let her sentence trail off into nothingness.

~*~**~*~
“That morning, I offered you some of the meat to take home to your family. And you walked away.”

Elona’s face was burning with a flush. So much she’d said to that fox, that she’d never told a soul. She’d kissed his head, scratched his ears. This was humiliating. Elona pulled Sionn closer into the hug, if only to bury her face in his shoulder so he couldn’t see her expression. Heavens knew he already knew far more about her than she had suspected. Pieces were beginning to fall into place, things that had seemed innocent enough. His comment about almost not recognizing her, his question about if she considered herself ruthless. The connection he seemed to feel instantly that had taken time to grow within her. His eyes. Pulling back abruptly, Elona stared searchingly into Sionn’s now-shocked expression.

“Your eyes are the same. How did I not notice it?”

“... Because you didn’t know foxes that turned human were a thing?” Sionn offered helpfully, giving a lopsided and mildly sheepish grin. “Maybe because I didn’t want you to know that had been me?”

“Why not?” The stinging prickle of discomfort was immediate. If he had regretted their meeting, why track her down? “Why would you want to hide that?”

“Because I… I was pathetic. I am pathetic.” Sionn dropped his head again, refusing to meet her eyes. “I mean. How many times have you rescued me since that night?”

“You weren’t the only one rescued that night.”

The admission surprised Elona as much as it did Sionn. She felt his back stiffen beneath her hands, but he didn’t raise his head yet. She could almost hear him thinking back over the things she had said that night. It hadn’t entered her mind very often, it was true, but Elona had gone over it often enough in her mind to remember it with vivid clarity. It had been a turning point. Not an immense one, her life hadn’t changed with any significance since then. Until she met Sionn. Again. Her life had, however, continued.

“I don’t… understand.” Sionn’s voice was hesitant, strained. It sounded as if he was struggling with having to admit he couldn’t figure it out.

“I live a very lonely life. As far back as I can recall, I always have.” Elona shifted her eyes away, unable to look into his unbreaking gaze. “I was… I…”

Sionn patted her head. Eyes opening wide, Elona glanced back at him as he shifted to scratching behind her ear. Oh. Does he think that’s how you offer comfort? Despite the severity of the conversation, despite the awkward tangle of a hug they were in, Elona had to bite the inside of her cheek to stifle laughter. It had been what she had done, back when she thought he was just a fox. Lifting one of her hands from his back, she rested it lightly on his hand. His fingers stilled, and Elona shifted. For a moment, she wasn’t sure what she was going to do. Her hand moved his of it’s own accord, though, and she found herself turning her cheek into his palm.

“My friend.” It slipped through her murmured lips as she closed her eyes. “Both as a fox, and as you are now, you’ve managed to slip past my defenses.”


DP: How does Sionn react?[/b]
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 20, 2015 9:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Elona had to bit (bite) the inside of her cheek to stifle laughter.

There may have been other mistakes, I dont know, this is the only thing that disrupted my reading Razz

Because it was a good read, and I think it was a perfect little moment to add to both of the characters and maake even more of a connection Smile

If I was Sion, I think I'd feel a mix of awkwardness, and guilt/pathetic as he showed, maybe hope and happiness because now his friend remembers him :O

so...emotions are what I think of when you say 'react' but if you're asking more like actions....maybe give her a hug?
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 20, 2015 9:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Fixed! Thank you. I was going to wait til after work to finish it, but instead I squeezed it in this morning. I'm surprised there aren't more errors. XD
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 20, 2015 6:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, the flashback was WONDERFUL. It was neat getting to have a minor glimpse into who Elona was before meeting Sionn. The part about breathing was really neat. I have a thing with breathing. I love to hear my husband breathing while he sleeps and my kids too. It was just a really sweet part. And his eyes are the same!!! AWWWW!!!

I also loved that he tried to scratch her behind the ears. That was precious. XD

I'm going to say that Sionn just stares at her for a second in shock before giving her a tearful smile and maybe hugging her again. Maybe he says that he's been longing to hear her call him that again. <3 SO MUCH SWEETNESS!!
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 20, 2015 9:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Awww. This chapter was super cute. I really enjoyed the contrast between how Elona interacted with Sionn the first time they met vs. how she sees him now. It kind of gives the story a fairy-tale vibe that it didn't have before, in a good way (I guess the theme of animals that are more [humanlike] than they seem is pretty common? And it's been part of the story since Sionn's first appearance, but the flashback in this chapter really drives that point home). The way they're both embarrassed about the states they were in during that first encounter also pleases me. They're very different people, but they're also the same in a lot of ways that weren't obvious at first.

Hell of a DP to leave us with, too. I don't think it would be in character for Sionn to do something to test how much he's slipped past her defenses like randomly kissing her or something like that. It caught me off guard, so I have to assume it would catch him off guard, too. He seems pretty inquisitive--maybe he should need a moment or to to process, then ask Elona for more information about those defenses he's slipped past? Like what exactly they keep out, or how they were formed in the first place?
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 23, 2015 8:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

If I dont get any more responses within 2 or 3 hours, ill put up a flash poll. ^^
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 23, 2015 10:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh! It's so sweet! I love this chapter so much!

I think Sionn would stare at her kinda speechless, I mean, what do you say after something like that???
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 28, 2015 12:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

How does Sionn react to this revelation?
Stare speechless.
50%
50% [ 2 ]
Pester with questions!
0%
0% [ 0 ]
Hug, overwhelmed with emotions.
25%
25% [ 1 ]
Tearfully tell her how happy he is to be called that again.
25%
25% [ 1 ]
Total Votes : 4
Who Voted: Andolyn, kkdestiny, Sapphire_Rayne, themightyzan


Chapter Twelve


Humans throats worked differently. The declarative noise, unique to foxes, wouldn’t come out. Instead, only a stunned silence emerged from his lips. Even as his heart began to beat wildly out of control, Sionn fought to remind himself he was going too fast. Foxes moved quickly, loved instantly, and stayed together forever. That was a universal law to his kind, magical or no. Humans, however, did not. They wooed slowly, loved rarely, and often strayed. It didn’t matter how much his heart and soul and body all knew Elona was meant to be his, she didn’t know. Which meant he couldn’t possibly let her know until she was ready, or risk scaring her off entirely. It was only sheer luck and persistence that she’d accepted his close friendship.

The silence stretched out, and Elona turned her head slightly, her hand still holding his. As she stared back, Sionn swallowed nervously. His love had been building up inside him, barely suppressed and ignored, but now it seemed as if it was spilling out of him from every pore. How could she not see it? Surely it had started as infatuation, admiration for the hunter who showed him compassion in a tough time. Then he’d met her again, and he’d been determined to follow. Her gentle hesitance had been so achingly sweet, such a surprise from the woman who had claimed him as friend in an instant. As he saw more of her strength of will and vulnerability of the heart, Sionn fell harder and faster. Yet, even as she stared at him with soft warmth in her pale green gaze, Sionn knew she hadn’t fallen yet. Patience had never been his strong suit, but surely the love of Elona was worth it?

Ignoring the pessimistic thoughts attempting to creep in, Sionn finally grinned. She knew. That was the thing to focus on. She knew, and she wasn’t ashamed of him. If anything, she seemed to appreciate him even more. Laughing, Sionn leaned forward to bump his forehead against hers. Her eyes seemed so huge from this angle, the green all but swallowed up by the black.

“It’s sure nice to hear that again.”

“What’s that?”

“‘My friend.’”

“It’s… nice to say it.”

“Elona?”

“Yeah?”

“... My knee is about to give out. Unless you want me collapsing on you, we should move.”

He hadn’t wanted to say anything, but the truth was his leg was shaking from supporting his weight at this angle, and he really would fall on her. Even though he was shorter and had a lean frame for a man, he likely would still crush her. Regretfully pulling away, Sionn found himself breathing out, as if by leaving his breath near her some part of him might stay close. He shifted into a cross-legged sitting position, bracing his hands on his knees and pushing down. His heart hadn’t calmed down, and it only seemed to go faster when he looked at Elona. A sudden, horrifying thought occurred to him. For foxes it was only winter, but as a human… Shaking his head and taking a bracing breath, Sionn pulled a hopefully carefree smile.

“So, Elona, what’s next?”

She blinked a moment, before leaning to sit with her legs tucked underneath her, resting the majority of her weight on her hip and the hand she placed on the ground for balance. Sionn watched her as she nibbled on her lips, feeling a rush of heat. Oh god. What’s happening? Afraid he knew the answer, Sionn focused on the fire instead. The jumps and leaps of the flame seemed alive, like a red-orange creature fighting for the sky but endlessly trapped on the ground. His heartbeat began to calm down, and Sionn felt like himself again. Letting out the tiniest sigh of relief, Sionn cheerfully lifted his head towards Elona as she began to speak.

“I still… I still feel like the smarter thing, the safer thing, would be for you to go back to your family. You won’t change my mind on that. But… I’m not going to force you to leave.” She sighed and dropped her head, and Sionn felt his cheerful mood begin to slip. “I- Being honest, I don’t want you to leave. I didn’t… I didn’t back then either. Just like when we first met, though, I’m leaving it up to you.”

“Elona-”

“Wait.” She held up a hand, and Sionn bit his tongue to halt his words. He’d listen to whatever she had to say, but he’s already made up his mind. “I’m… I’m going to pursue this murder-temple thing.” She waved the hand she’d interrupted him with towards where the ruins had been. “And I promise to keep you as safe as I can, but it’s… It’s probably going to be really really dangerous.”

“The forest is dangerous. Life is dangerous.” Sionn placed his hands on the ground, lifting himself up and shifting over to sit closer to her. “But I think we can handle it. We’re pretty smart, I think. And I still have my knife, so we’re not defenseless.”

Elona smiled at him again, and Sionn silently congratulated himself for apparently saying the right thing this time. He’d been sure the reference to weapons would be a painful reminder that they’d lost her bow. There was a moment of silence, before Elona glanced up at the sky. It was dark now, and the wind rustling the trees branches was revealing a small spattering of stars. The trees weren’t very dense in their little meadow, and they provided little protection from the cold. Missing his fur, Sionn shivered and scooted closer to the fire. His stomach grumbled, and Sionn chuckled at the irony.

“Seems like I end up hungry and at your campfire quite a bit lately.”

“I’m sorry, I’ll hunt something down to eat tomorrow. For now, why don’t you rest?”

For a moment, the prospect of sleeping after the intense trials of the ruins seemed appealing, and Sionn even felt his eyes begin to close. Then, blinking, his head shot over to Elona. Staring at her, confused, Sionn thought over the night before. He’d been groggy and fallen asleep on Elona’s lap, and she’d been awake when he came to. His eyebrows furrowing, Sionn leaned towards her again. Her pale complexion, while beautiful, did little to hide the purple marks under her eyes once he looked closer.

“Uh… Sionn?” Elona was staring back at him with a bewildered expression.

“When did you last sleep?”

“Huh?” Her mouth fell open into a delicate little ‘o’.

“You didn’t sleep last night. You fell asleep in the bath the night before, right? Was that the last time you’ve gotten some sleep?” Sionn crossed his arms, attempting to show he was being stern about this. Thinking about it, it had been odd that she was awake so late the first night they met.

“I don’t sleep very often Sionn, I’ll be fine.”

“Elona, you need to get some rest too.”

“Sleep isn’t very restful for me, Sionn.” Elona admitted in a soft voice. “I have nightmares.”

Sionn had had nightmares a few times as a kit, and vaguely remembered how the warmth of his mother seemed to banish them away. Were the nightmares responsible for the pain he sometimes saw behind Elona’s calm mask? Looking down, Sionn began tapping his finger on his boot. Surely there was something he could do to help? No matter how much she might pretend she didn’t need it, the toll of sleeping so rarely had to be weighing against her. If it wasn’t, it would soon. The thought of Elona getting hurt because she’d elected to stay awake while he slept squeezed the air from his lungs, and he gave a determined nod to himself.

Giving her very little warning, Sionn reached out and placed his hand on the back of her head, slowing shifting it down until her head was resting on his thigh. The posture was similar to the one he’d fallen into the night before, and Sionn nodded again, proud of himself for thinking of it. Though plainly confused, Elona went along with it, not questioning him until she was already laying down.

“Sionn? I told you, I-”

“You let me sleep like this last night.” Sionn blurted out, interrupting her. He didn’t want to give her a chance to talk her way out of this. He was determined she at least try to sleep. “I don’t know for sure if it’ll help with the nightmares, but it’s worth a shot, right? I mean, you haven’t tried this before, right?”

Aware that he sounded like an idiot repeating his words so much, Sionn smacked his face silently. As comfortable and happy as he was being around her, any time it was important he say just the right thing, his tongue seemed to swell up and tie itself in knots inside his mouth. As he inwardly kicked himself, Sionn felt Elona relax against his leg, and move one of her hands. She rested it palm down on his leg near her head, bracing her cheek against it. The rush of heat returned, and Sionn swallowed around the lump suddenly forming in his throat. Maybe this wasn’t the best idea…

“Thank you, Sionn. I’ll at least try.” She was silent for a few moments, and Sionn was wondering if she’d fallen asleep when her slightly sleep-slurred voice murmured, “Wake me up when you want to sleep.”

Sionn knew when she truly had fallen asleep, because her breathing slowed, and then regulated itself. His ears twitched, and as he listened to the cadence of her lungs, Sionn felt a strange sort of reverence overcome him. As little as they might actually know about each other, Sionn knew deep down that this was perhaps the most vulnerable she had allowed herself to ever be around someone. There was some sort of a magic to it, and a measure of pride that he was the one she could relax with. A deep longing overtook him, his greatest wish in that moment to be able to hear this sweet music every night for as long as he might live. Taking a deep, contented breath, Sionn closed his eyes a moment.

The sounds of the forest at night were all easy for him to pinpoint and discard. His hearing was one of the traits that was constant between his forms, and so sound had always held a certain sort of power over him. There was the sound of owls in the distance, and as they questioned ‘who’, ‘who, Sionn mentally answered them with Elona’s name, and then ignored their inquiries. The serenading of the cricket was applauded, but there was no request for an encore coming from him. The crackle of the fire was as vivacious as any person he’d ever met, but just as easily ignored. The howls of distant wolves was harder to dismiss, as the instinctual bit of fear shivered over him, but soon they too fell away. It was only Elona and her breathing that he heard. The whole world was gone, abandoned in favor of her sleeping voice.

This focus was why he knew, down to an instant, when the plan had failed. It started as the faintest of whimpers, and Sionn’s eyes snapped open. He held his breath, hoping against hope that he had perhaps been wrong. That for once his ears had failed him. A soft gasp, like it’d been torn from lungs filled with grief, and then Elona curled into a tight ball. Her legs had been extended and relaxed before, the very sign of splendid repose. Now she looked like a small child, her nails biting into his thigh as she gripped for reality. Her breathing quickened, like she was running a great distance. Plunging his hands into her hair, Sionn desperately tried rubbing at her scalp. That always relaxed him, maybe…? Her shoulders relaxed from their bunched up position, and her breathing shifted into soft pants. It wasn’t relaxation, but she seemed to have calmed down a little. Not daring to breath a sigh of relief, Sionn continued to massage at Elona’s scalp.

It proved a temporary measure, however. Gradually she began to ball back up, this time her hands forming fists. Even in her sleep, tears began to slide down her face. They left blue-green trails a bitter reminder to Sionn that Elona likely had plenty of reason for these nightmares. Removing his hands from her hair, Sionn balled one up and punched the ground. How was it fair that no matter the form, he was useless to those he loved most?! Gasping, and outstanded by his selfishness, Sionn redirected his attention back to Elona, grabbing her by the shoulders now. He had to wake her up, this couldn’t be any sort of restful. Except, how was he supposed to wake her up? His outburst hadn’t woken her, neither had grabbing her. He might have to get rough to wake her up. There was a heavy weight on his heart at the thought of doing that, but there was no way he could just allow her to suffer through this. Why oh why did I have such a stupid idea?

~~*~~~*~~~*~~


DP: How does Sionn wake her up?

DP is a little different this time, I won’t be polling. I’ll be incorporating as many of the suggestions as possible in the next chapter start. So be creative!

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 28, 2015 8:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LOVED the description of the differences between how humans love and how foxes love. I think it really adds to his character to know that. It adds to the relationship in general.

AND I LOVE THAT SHE SLEEPS ON HIM!!! Letting herself be vulnerable with him was a BIG thing for her.

I'm going to be the jerk over here and say that he kisses her. XD
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 28, 2015 8:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

oh man...I loved it, the little hints to mating and love and stuff XP

Definitely adds an interesting dynamic.

My comment wont be all that great, because I'm actualy pretty tired today. Heh, but I loved it. I'm actually afraid of what'd happen if we woke her up via kiss, so im more inclined to say some shoulder shaking be in order :3
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 02, 2016 11:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Your close tracking of Sionn's emotions and reactions is engrossing as usual =D. I liked how he realized she hadn't slept in awhile on his own/because he was thinking about her instead of because of Elona getting tired enough so the sleep deprivation noticeably affects her actions. As for the DP, I think he should try talking to her/maybe shaking her shoulder (not violently, just vigorously enough so he might wake her without hurting her.) Kissing her while she's not only sleeping but extra vulnerable because she's having nightmares would be pretty creepy o__o.
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 03, 2016 5:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I Agree that a bit of shoulder shaking is needed but don't shake her so hard she'll get whiplash right away start gentle then slowly work your way up.That way we'll hit the absolute minimal shakeage needed to wake her up.
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 05, 2016 12:48 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Excellent chapters, Noni! Both Sionn and Elona are so sweet and awkward and lovely. It's fantastic. And, finally, the secret of how they first met is revealed! Very well done on writing that flashback btw.

Hm...I would suggest that he tugs on her ears (gently but persistently, maybe with a few sharper tugs afterwards if it doesn't work initially). Seems weird, I know, but Sionn, as we already know, has sensitive ears. If someone were to do that to him I'm sure he would wake up almost instantly, and maybe it's this knowledge/instinct as a fox that makes him try it on Elona. Human ears can be sensitive too, lol.
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 05, 2016 1:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Let me first apologize that I haven't been on top of commenting.. I've already talked to you about it so you know, but still. I am sorry.

I'm really glad we get to see how they met, and interacted before - which adds to how Sionn was acting in the begging! So I'm totally okay with this. I loved the flashback, and I loved how Elona slipped out with calling him 'my friend' once more. Just love love love it all!

I'll do my normal breakdown on the latest chapter for you, because if I were to do both I would have no time to get ready for work.

I absolutely adore how you continue to put in things for Sionn that actual foxes would do, it shows you've done your research! Though, knowing you personally, I knew you would~ A line actually hit me from the first paragraph (I lied. It's a series of lines) , this one I believe:

Quote:
Foxes moved quickly, loved instantly, and stayed together forever. That was a universal law to his kind, magical or no. Humans, however, did not. They wooed slowly, loved rarely, and often strayed.


It flowed really well in my eyes, and I find myself rereading it just because I love how smooth and completely true it is.

Also, I am loving the fact that he has to somewhat talk himself into having patience, and the mention of her eyes again. If anything, I am a sucker for eyes and I enjoy every single time they are described. Then we have the lovely dialogue between them and he mentioned his knee - which I didn't expect to be honest. Not sure why, but I didn't.

I GET WHAT YOU REFERENCED THERE IN MENTIONING THE FOXES AND WINTER THING. But aside from that, because that is totally not my focus here, as I love that fire description! And Elona letting out her thoughts as of this far was just awesome to read. Especially when she called the ruins murder-temples. I wish I had come up with that, though I did come up with death rooms so, can't complain.

Sionn being so real with calling it spade to spade as life is a dangerous thing was great, this whole chapter - no this whole story - is just great and I really feel guilty that I hadn't had the time to be keeping up.

And then we learn Elona has nightmares. . . oh boy. I sense we are all going to tear up or cry at some point because of these nightmares. Maybe letting her sleep wasn't the best move there Sionn, but the sentiment was nice. And the frustration at him not being able to help! Oh I feel my heart from within your hands. Return it at anytime, really.

I say that Sionn shakes her shoulders. That's the first thing I can think of, my next thought was to pinch her maybe, but I can't see Sionn doing that because it could hurt. I don't think he'd have it in him to tap her on the cheek to wake her either, so maybe tapping her shoulder or back, and then shaking her? He could also try to talk to her, or call her name out. Those are my suggestions, though there is a lot . . . whoops.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 06, 2016 2:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

*flails under mounds of work guiltily* I am finally caught back up, little NoNi, and my how you have blossomed as a writer. I couldn't be prouder of you. I was so relieved when I saw how you had Sionn and Elona flashback to when they'd met before, which makes him following her a lot less weird now. Smile Well done, poppet. As for your DP incorporation... maybe, cold water on her face? Which might be rude, given her circumstances with water, but still it might shock her enough to wake her out of her nightmare.
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2016 11:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Heres the chapter, but it was written on my phone on a long bus ride, so be gentle. Hope you enjoy it!

Chapter Thirteen

She’d been here before. Even before she opened her eyes, she knew with certainty what she would see. Despite that, and her fervent wish to keep them closed, Elona felt her eyelids lift. The oppressive darkness that seeped in towards her was broken only by a faint, sickly green glow in the distance. She lay on the sand, pushed into it with the confining, wet pressure of what she could only guess was water. Telling her arms to move, to touch her skin and figure out if it was scaled over, wouldn’t work. It never did. The dream always had control, and it would do as it wished. The knowledge was almost as disheartening as the dream itself. Even as she remembered that was so, the memory of the dream faded, and the horror began anew.

Her hand slid into the shifting sands beneath her as she used it to push herself up. The wet clumpy texture of the grits of sand seemed to be scraping her skin down to the nerve. She couldn’t see them, but her legs felt fused together, the shape of them all wrong. Even as panic flooded her mind, and she struggled against the invisible bonds, they lay still. Neither could she turn her head to see just what contained them. The glow grew closer, stronger, and Elona began to be able to pick out shapes around her. Dancing seaweed stretched out towards her like a shaking hand, seeking her out. Images of them reaching inside her and clutching at her organs flashed through her mind. Even as she mentally shirked away, her body seemed to lift higher, towards the light. It emanated from a hazy form, one swimming towards her. Though she whimpered, no sound emerged from her lips.

“My sweet,” The words presumably came from the figure, but they felt as if they were bouncing around in every direction before reaching Elona.

The voice was chillingly cold, and felt like a set of eels sliding along her skin, but Elona’s body responded with a childish laugh, reaching out towards the figure with both arms. It tutted, and swam around behind her. The pinpricks that raced across her skin felt like the stabbing of a thousand tiny poisoned swords, but her body didn’t react. It remained seated on the ocean floor, giggling softly to itself. The noise, ripped unwilling from her own throat, echoed around her skull until that was all she could hear, over and over. It drowned out any other sounds, including her own gasp and the rest of what the chilling figure had to say.

Long, delicate arms wrapped around her, swallowing up her whole body. Even as her spine relaxed and she leaned into the hold, Elona began to pant desperately for breath. The darkness was pressing in again, with the glow behind her now, and it felt as if the very weight of the water, resting on her tiny chest, was pushing any hope for air out of her. Desperate pleas with her body to move, break free from the hold, do anything to push towards the surface, all went unheard. Closing her eyes, the slimy feel of the figures skin pressing into her, Elona felt herself slipping away, being lost to the depths of the dream.

A soft pressure on her scalp. Instantly, the knowledge of the nightmare, of the way it should go, rushed back to her. This wasn’t right. There had never been any head rubs in the nightmare. What was going on? She sat up in shock, and for a moment, her body did as she commanded. Then, as the figures sharp nails pressed into her scalp instead of the soothing weight of its palms, the dream took over anew, and sanity faded.

The hands slid down from her head to her ears. For a moment, they just rested there, pointed finger tips tracing the curve of the lobes. Then, sharply, they tugged. Though she cried out, her body did nothing. It didn’t even giggle. Something inside her felt unseated, like the world had tilted and she wasn’t noticing it at first. Swallowing, she found herself merely waiting to see what would happen next. The hands vanished, and just as quick, they were poking her back. The pressure was intense, she felt like she was being stabbed, and her breath gasped out of her. Except, there were no bubbles floating to the surface. No breath had left. Sobbing weakly at the prison of her own body, Elona deflated. Tears pricked her eyes, desperation turned to bleak numbness.

The world suddenly did tilt, her body at an awkward angle with the sand. She couldn’t tell which direction she was looking now, and the bewilderment only edged on the panic fluttering inside her too-quick heart. The shaking began, though Elona could no longer see the figure, or the sand, or the ocean. Closing her eyes, Elona cried out, a name tumbling from her lips, a name she didn’t know. A sudden drop, she was falling forward. Her face struck something hard, and she tasted blood, but it wasn’t hers. How did she know it wasn’t hers?

The shock of water, actual water, yanked her violently back into true reality. Gasping and sputtering, Elona reached up to wipe the droplets away from her eyes. Her shoulders slumped with sweet relief when her arms did as she bid. She was awake. Taking a shuddering breath, Elona opened her eyes. She was kneeling on the ground, and Sionn sat in front of her, his eyes wide with fright. In his hands was her canteen, open and upended. His lower lip was split, a small trickle of blood dripping down. Her hands, resting on her knees, tightened into nervous fists. What had she done in her dream to cause him to fear her? Had she caused the wound on his mouth?

As quickly as she began to spiral into self reflection, though, Sionn’s arms came around her, tightly, desperately. A muffled gasp was dragged from her lungs as her face was thrust into his shoulder. His fingers were splayed, his hands and arms covering most of the expanse of her back.

“Sionn?” Her voice was soft, hesitant. She still didn't know how she had frightened him.

“You weren't waking up. I'm so, so sorry! I'm sorry I made you sleep, I’m sorry you had to go through that, I'm sorry I had to splash you!”

He was frightened for me? Not of me? Elona gave pathetic, broken laugh into his shoulder, before lifting her arms and hugging him back. She began to shake, uncontrollably. The comfort his warmth offered was irresistible, and her own meager protests fell away quickly. So many times she’d had that nightmare, and so many others, and merely shoved them away and moved on. Taking a deep breath, Elona gradually became aware of Sionn rubbing her back. The shaking tapered off, until she was calm again. Sionn made no move to let go, however, and Elona selfishly savored it.

Her sense of smell might not be as strong as his, but nonetheless his scent began to seep into her. It was earthy, not too different from the smell of rain upon freshly upturned dirt, with an undercurrent of a spice she couldn't place. Unconsciously nuzzling her nose closer, trying to get a better wiff of the spice, Elona pressed her ear against him. The thud of his heartbeat shocked her out of her reverie, and a vivid blush painted itself over her cheeks. His heart was racing, tripping over itself to double its speed, and Elona’s lips opened as she realized her heart was responding in kind.

Pushing away, Elona gave a breathless chuckle, reaching up with one hand to tug on her hair. Blinking at her for a moment, Sionn turned his flushed face towards the dying fire. He brushed at his bleeding mouth with his knuckle. He opened his mouth to say something, but Elona would never know what, because she blurted out,

“I'm going to go find the river to refill the canteen.” She reached out and grabbed it, pushing awkwardly to her feet. “Wh-why don't you stay here and keep the fire going?”

Not waiting for his answer, Elona spun on her heel and strode off determinedly in the direction she believed the water to be. Once out of his sight, Elona reached up to press her hands against her flaming cheeks. What was that. Oh god. Rubbing her fingers against her eyes, Elona realized she’d had the bad luck of her face being dry when she pulled away. There was no avoiding that he’d seen her blush.

Reaching the river, Elona dropped to her knees next to it with a sigh. The water at this bend still had a quick current, enough to keep the water clear, but lacked the force that had swept Sionn away earlier. Puzzling over just how little time had passed since then, Elona dipped the canteen into the water. Mindlessly watching the bubbles of air that escaped, Elona fought off the lingering memories of the nightmare.

Once the canteen was full, Elona capped it, and remained kneeling by the river. Here in the dark, free for a moment of Sionn’s lovely but distracting presence, Elona allowed herself to take stock. She still had some money saved up, sewn into her bag. There were rabbits in this forest that she could take down with her small collection of throwing knives, so they wouldn't starve on their way North. Once they reached that city, though, finding food and accommodations would require money. More than usual, with Sionn there. No bow, no deer, no income.

Except…

Taking a deep breath, Elona turned to look back the way she came. Would Sionn follow her? She knew he likely wouldn't approve of her decision, but it was all that was left to them. She would take care of Sionn, and that meant earning money was necessary. If it had kept food in her belly as a child, it would keep food in his now.

Changing her position to sit on the ground with her legs in front of her, Elona unlaced her right boot. It took a small measure of force to get it to let go of her leg, before she set it to the side. Following that was her stocking, shoved deep inside to protect it from the elements. Already bracing herself for the coming pain, Elona rolled her pants leg up past her knee.

The trees that blocked the moon prevented her from being able to see the series of crescent shaped scars scattered over her leg, but she didn't need to see them to know they were there. Before happenstance had led her to that grizzly old hunter, this had been her only way of earning money. Reaching over to the river, Elona cupped her hand and dipped it into the water. Its cool kiss and gentle nudges seemed to be urging her against her choice, but Elona merely lifted her hand and poured the water over her leg. Scales, vibrant and vivid, appeared just as always.

Taking a deep breath in, and slowly letting it out, Elona grabbed one of the scales with her fingers, giving it a sharp tug. The scale popped out of her skin deceptively easily, giving no hint to the searing pain left behind. Elonas breath hissed out between gritted teeth, and she realized she forgot to prep a pouch. Pulling one out of her bag, Elona placed it open on the ground, and dropped the scale in. Wiping away the blood oozing from where the first scale had been pulled, Elona plucked the next one. The sharp pain raced through her again, leaving an electrifying lightning bolt of vivid pinpricks. Gritting her teeth, Elona set to work.

Unaware of how much time had passed, Elona was determinedly plucking and dropping the scales. If she did a little each night, she could get the bag full before they needed it, all without Sionn being any the wiser. Making the decision that she had enough for now, Elona plucked one final scale. Ignoring her own gasp of pain and dropping it into the bag, Elona let her hand fall to her side with a sigh of relief.

“E-Elona?”

Tensing, Elona lifted her head. Standing there, just inside the brush, was Sionn.



~~*~~~*~~~*~~

DP: What does Sionn do?
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2016 3:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh my Elona. You brave girl. Willing to go through such pain again for someone you care about. Its simply incredible what people will do for those they care about. For the DP I think Sionn should plead that Elona not do it anymore then work really hard to catch animals for the cash and the food so Elona doesn't have to sacrifice anything.
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2016 4:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Holy hot damn, Noni, this chapter was excellent!

I know you were worried about the nightmare, but I thought it was very well done. Especially with how you used all our suggestions for waking her up to change/affect the dream.

It pains me to have Elona do that to herself simply for money (and having the knowledge that she did that to herself as a child, too...dreadful stuff). It makes me wonder how she knew/found out that her scales were worth any bit of coin.

For the DP...I think Sionn will tell her, beg her really, to stop. That they can find another way. If she's not convinced, or is being too stubborn, maybe he can take drastic measures and say that if she's doing that then he'll cut off his own tail. Fur is valuable too, you know (and I'm pretty sure that will make her stop immediately).
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2016 5:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

-nods- very good...I like the little insight too, and also wonder how she first found out....and why they're valuable in the first place, actually.

and i actually can't offer anything others haven't already...unless he doesnt know what she just did, then ask. Maybe spot the pouch and the residual blood.
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 15, 2016 1:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

This chapter o_________o. The nightmare was interesting---fused legs + the glowing (but oddly parental-seeming?) figure seems like a tantalizing glimpse into Elona's childhood, but if that's what it is... how did her legs get unfused o___o.

Did not predict her ripping off her scales to make money (though it makes sense), so that was pretty disarming. I loved how Sionn finds her just after she's thinking of how she's going to hide it from him.

As for the DP, I feel like Sionn would definitely try to find some other way of making money. He seems like he'd know just telling her not to do that for his sake wouldn't be enough, especially after she already tried to get him to not stay with her. But then if he thinks of himself as useless (or at least, useless as a fox), he may have a hard time coming up with things he thinks he can actually do on the spot. I think his feelings for Elona will take precedence over his lack of practical/hunting skills, though, so he should at least come up with some possibilities and tell Elona to let him try before she rips out any more scales.
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 15, 2016 4:48 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Aww!!! This chapter was precious!

I loved the nightmare, and I love that he hugged her, of course. That was just SUPER sweet. The description of his heartbeat was VERY nice. I loved that.

It also makes me sad that she had to do that as a child. =( I think Sionn will be DEVASTATED that she'd hurt herself on his account. I don't know that Sionn would have the words to say how it makes him feel, as I think it's going to be an intense emotion since he already views her as his forever mate. I think he doesn't even say a word. He just turns and runs into the forest, determined to do something else that would make money. Maybe he hunts something. Maybe he finds something about himself that would make money. If she was willing to make the sacrifice to help him, he'll feel he should do the same for her.
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 16, 2016 12:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm of the opinion takes a different tack this time around; he's seen how being childish and panicking a tad too much is unhelpful and stressful to Elona. Perhaps he should quietly walk over and press some moss or a cloth to the bleeding area and quietly give his opinion that she should not be pulling out pieces of herself. Then Elona should fess up that it's the only way she knows of to provide for them for the journey North and into the city.

Here's where Sionn and Elona can disagree wholeheartedly and Sionn can reveal what he has been doing to provide for himself on his own this whole time he's been human. (Perhaps some performing art, slide of hand, juggling, tale-singing aka bard style at taverns and Inns?)

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 16, 2016 12:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Poll is live! I'm thinking it'll be up for 48 hours (Til my next day off), but if there's a demand for it, I'll leave it up a little longer than that.
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 18, 2016 1:21 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Okay, okay! I'm a bit late to this, but I am caught up. xD And I am very very glad I am caught up!

This story overall is very sweet and precious without being too overwhelming. I like that a lot since sometimes stories like these can be too much but you've really struck a balance here! Great job! I also really appreciate your descriptors. You've managed to keep them long enough to be interesting, but not so long as to be tiresome. I'm really looking forward to keeping up with this story.

Annnnndddddd....I can't decide who I like more - Elona or Sionn. It's so hard saying! They're a great couple so far! =D

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 18, 2016 8:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm so glad everyone is liking it so far! And Wellspring, you may have caught up just in time. I have a lot of fun things planned for the upcoming chapters!

That being said, the poll will close in 24 hours! Last chance, if there's any lurkers waiting to read!


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 18, 2016 1:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I promised you a comment after I voted so, here we go~

That nightmare, just wow. I thought parts of it weren't really scary until I remembered that Elona really doesn't have a bit of her memory. And then that made it scary, and a bit worrisome. If this is just one of her nightmares, what might the others be if there even are others?

I also liked how it shifted depending on what Sionn was doing, that was so clever and something I'll admit I could never manage to do. Very, very well done! WHY DOES SIONN HAVE A SPLIT LIP. WOMAN. WHY DO WE KEEP HURTING THE FOX? Okay, caps are done. Maybe.

The scents and the heartbeats and just yes. I can't say more than that. And Elona runs off in awkwardness, which I love. And the fact that Sionn could see her blush made that moment fifteen times better to me. I'll admit, I was panicked when it came to light that they'd need more money, but when I saw the except . . it only fueled it. That wasn't the kind of except I like to see Noni.

AND I WAS WRONG. WE DON'T JUST KEEP HURTING THE FOX. Why? Oh man, I winced reading her plucking the scales, and to think she had to do that as a child?! I just want to curl up and hug her.

I missed being able to put in a DP, but I voted for the one I would have put down. ^^ Looking forward to the next chapter as always Noni!
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 19, 2016 8:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laat chance to vote, guys! Leaving it up for one more hour!


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 27, 2016 12:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sorry about the delay in a new chapter, guys. As those of you on FB now, I've been pretty darn sick. Sorry again! I swear I didn't MEAN to leave it on a cliffhanger like this!
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 27, 2016 9:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote


Sionn has caught Elona pulling out her scales. What do?
Plead that Elona not do it anymore.
11% [ 1 ]
Take drastic measures and say that if she's doing that then he'll cut off his own tail.
0% [ 0 ]
Insist they find some other way of making money.
11% [ 1 ]
Turn and run into the forest, determined to do something else that would make money.
11% [ 1 ]
Quietly walk over and care for her wounds, and calmly give his opinion that she shouldn't do that.
66% [ 6 ]
Total Votes : 9
Who Voted: Adryrn, Andolyn, kkdestiny, Lilith, ModelP, Novelest_Ninjagirl, Sapphire_Rayne, Seraphi, Wellspring



Chapter Fourteen


Sionn had no idea how to wake her up. Did humans wake up differently to foxes? But wait, she’s not human. And I’m not strictly a fox. Nonetheless, that line of thought gave him an idea. The kits were always pulling on his ears when they wanted to play, and it was always a startlingly abrupt end to his slumber. Sliding his hands down to grasp her ears, he hesitated. His fingers, almost acting against his accord, ran over the curves of her ears before pulling sharply. There was a pang in his heart at the thought of hurting her, but aside from a soft cry, she didn’t react. She certainly didn’t wake up as he’d hoped she would. Moving his hands away to pull at his own ears, Sionn suppressed his frustration.

He must not have done so very well, because he poked a finger into her back. It wasn’t a forceful jab, but still, Sionn knew they had to have hurt. If nothing else, her small gasps confirmed it. Flexing his hands into and out of fists to calm himself down, Sionn tried to focus on Elona. No matter how frustrated he might be with himself for suggesting this fooled-hardy plan, she still needed to be woken up. She began to sob softly in her sleep, and something in Sionn broke. Grabbing her by the shoulders, Sionn lifted her slightly so that she was facing him, her legs folded beneath her. He began to shake, closing his eyes against the image, detesting himself for it. Being woken so frightfully from what must be a dastardly dream was no kindness, but surely it was the lesser of the evils presented?

“Sionn…”

Her voice was soft, broken, and it came out seemingly unbidden. The fact that she, locked deep within her mind, called out for him sent a shock down his body. His hands stiffened, losing their grip on her. She fell forward, her face smacking into his. Sionn felt the sting of her teeth against his lip, gasping in pain at the taste of his blood. Seconds later the actual pain came, but Sionn was already more focused on Elona, leaning forward on him at an awkward angle. Her bag, still strapped to her side, gaped open, and Sionn glanced inside. He recognized the canteen, having seen many hunters, and Elona herself, use it. Glancing up at the sky for another idea, any idea, Sionn reached out and grabbed it. Uncapping it was easier than he expected, and with a quick motion, he turned it over onto Elona’s face.

The first thing he noticed was her muscles stiffening instantly, pulling her into a kneeling position where she supported her own weight. Relief slumped his shoulders even as worry and shame flooded his expression. Her eyes opened, and Sionn held his breath. Would she be mad? Though he’d thought himself confident in their companionship, a tiny voice whispered that she’d surely turn him away now. Dropping the canteen, Sionn reached out and grabbed her, desperate suddenly to have her in his arms at least once more. Nothing felt more right than her face against his shoulder, and Sionn closed his eyes, savouring it. He allowed himself relief that she really had woken up, but it was short lived.

“Sionn?” Her voice was so different than when she’d called out to him, now soft and faintly confused.

“You weren't waking up. I'm so, so sorry! I'm sorry I made you sleep, I’m sorry you had to go through that, I'm sorry I had to splash you!” The explanation burst from his lips, and he squeezed his eyes shut against whatever might come next.

Her little broken chuckle was a surprise, but before Sionn could shift to see her expression, her arms had wrapped around him. He could feel her quivering in his hold, so Sionn squeezed tighter, pulling her even closer. His hand, already resting on her back, moved in soothing motions over it’s expanse. He wasn’t sure if he’d seen someone do that, or if he was going off of some sort of instinct, but it seemed to work. Slowly, she stopped shaking, and Sionn let out the breath he had been holding.

His shoulders, tensed in fear earlier, slumped down now, and he just held her. I don’t know what happened in that nightmare of hers, He mused selfishly to himself, but I’m going to hold on until she pushes me away. Her face was pressed into his chest, the water that had been on her face seeping through his clothes. No chill reached him, though, because her warmth was right there. Even as he closed his eyes again to savour it, Sionn felt Elona nuzzle him. Eyes popping back open instantly, Sionn stilled. His heart began to beat rapidly, and Sionn swallowed. It was strange how just the little nudging of her nose into his flesh could make his heart run away with him, and Sionn knew it, so he tried to remain as normal as possible.

It didn’t help, though, and Elona pulled away. Biting the inside of his lip against the despondent whimper that tried to slip out, Sionn merely stared. Elona had a vivid flush going over the tops of her cheeks. Sionn wished he could tell by looking if it were merely embarrassment or… Turning his head towards the fire, Sionn battled with himself. I’m going to scare her off. Not because I’m an animal, but because I’m a man. Ah, is this what humans call irony? Opening his mouth to make some sort of attempt at humor, Sionn was interrupted by Elona.

“I'm going to go find the river to refill the canteen.” Her hand darted out to grab it, and Sionn realized he must have dropped it when he hugged her. “Wh-why don't you stay here and keep the fire going?”

He’d opened his mouth to answer, but her long legs had already carried her out of earshot. Huffing to himself, Sionn braced his chin on an upturned knee and stared at the fire. She’d taught him to start it, but trying to recall how to keep it going was proving difficult. Ah! Hazily, Sionn recollected seeing hunters add more bits of wood to the fires. Pushing to his feet and glancing around, Sionn began gathering bits of wood and twigs from around the campsite. No doubt he should have done this before forcing Elona into her nap, but-

While she was never far from his thoughts, thinking about her directly caused a fissure of concern to run up his spine. She’d been gone a while. How far was the river? Lowering the bunch of sticks still in his arms, Sionn lifted his chin and angled his ear towards where he’d thought the river was. Holding his breath to provide greater clarity to the sounds, Sionn figured the river couldn’t be all that far away. Dropping the sticks next to the fire, Sionn forced himself to sit down and push one stick into it. She hasn’t really been gone all that long. I just miss her so it seems longer, that’s all. While absolutely plausible, it did little to reassure him. Tapping his fingers against his leg, Sionn fed another stick to the fire. I’ll wait five sticks. Then I’ll put the fire out and go look for her.

Buoyed by his plan, Sionn sat up a little straighter. Slipping the first stick into the fire, Sionn glanced over his shoulder the direction where she’d come from. Maybe she’ll come walking out any moment, praise me for my fire-keeping skills, and sit next to me. A second stick followed the first. Briefly, shamefully, Sionn imagined her petting his head and ears again like the day they’d met. Sighing wistfully, he let himself relax into the daydream. Using the third stick, Sionn poked at the fire until it settled, letting go of the stick before it was engulfed. As he picked up the fourth stick, unease returned, banishing the loveliness of his mental meanderings. It went into the fire, and Sionn pushed to his feet. That’s good enough. I’d already put sticks into the fire when I decided to wait, right? Even as he justified it to himself, Sionn used his feet to sweep dirt onto the fire like he’d seen Elona do.

Sionn started off in the direction Elona had gone, before following his ears to find the river. With the night pressing in, only the faint glimmer of the moon emerging through the treetops, Sionn almost felt like a fox again. His breathing quieted, and he found himself glancing around to spot any prey. His hunting skills were limited, and he was rather terrible at following a scent or a set of tracks, but fighting. Fighting he was good at. If he could sneak up on some animal scampering home, he might surprise Elona with some food! Even as he tried not to worry about her vanishing, the sheer possibility of providing for her filled him with pride.

He was carefully stepping through the woods, still aimed in the direction of the river, when Sionn heard the stifled gasp. It was a minor distance away, and sounded faintly like a wounded animal. Speeding up as best as stealth could allow, Sionn noticed the brush begin to thin as they approached the riverbed. Maybe Elona already found something to eat, and she’s- His thought broke off as he peered around a tree. A beam of moonlight fell down from over the river, resting gently against Elona’s leg. Even as that was all that he could look at, he knew it was hers. The vivid green-blue skin was marred by a scattering of bloody crescent moons. For a second, rage filled him. Someone had hurt her? He would hurt them! Only, as quick as the rage went through him, he witnessed Elona plucking her own scale.

The rage went out of him with a breath, a gasp of astonishment. Still hidden, he watched as blood, a vivid red made only more vibrant by the skin it oozed from, formed the very same curved mark. She dropped the scale into her bag, and Sionn felt his remaining breath be kicked out of his lungs. Why was she keeping them? Was it some sick game? A thrill hunt? He knew of humans, many who had gone into the forest, who sought out danger for the excitement. Elona wasn’t one of them, though. Sionn knew that as steadfastly as he knew that water was wet. As she rested her hand at her side, Sionn spoke, no longer able to just watch.

“E-Elona?”

She lifted her head and their eyes met, and Sionn was surprised to see the fear and shame in Elona’s. Not only because of the emotions themselves, but because her eyes were normally so guarded he had to fight to see into them. Her mouth was open, like she was going to defend herself, but no words came. Part of him wanted to rage, wanted to demand to know why she’d hurt herself so. A smarter, calmer part urged him forward. His feet sank into the looser dirt of the riverbank, leaving behind boot-prints as he slowly, carefully walked towards her. Her mouth closed now, but opened right back up.

“Sionn, I-”

“Elona,” Sionn’s voice was calmer than he’d expected it to be, and very soft. He rested his hand on her knee, before looking in her pack with his other hand. “I don’t think you should be doing this.”

Ah-ha! Sionn found what he’d been looking for, a handkerchief, and pulled it out. Without waiting for permission, Sionn dipped a corner of it into the river. His hand still on her knee, Sionn began to clean up the bloody marks. As he washed them away, rinsing the handkerchief as it needed it, Sionn noticed the scars. While it broke his heart a little more to know this had occurred before, Sionn merely kept bathing her wounds. It was only when the bleeding had stopped that Sionn stopped, and raised his eyes to again meet hers.

Her expression was inscrutable, with one of her hands reaching up to cover her mouth, but tears were welling out and drifting down her face. Reaching out, Sionn wiped one away with his thumb. She let out a soft hiccup of gasp, and turned her face towards his hand.

“Elona?” His tone was questioning, but Sionn was careful to keep it from being demanding. He wanted to know why, had to know why, but the quickest way to ensure he wouldn’t would be to force her. His love needed a gentle, patient hand.

“Sionn…” Her voice was resigned, and just a little broken. Inwardly, Sionn vowed she would never again have to say his name in such a voice, but his expression- for once- betrayed nothing. “Without my bow, I can’t hunt. Which means no income. So, I have to support us like this for the time being.”

That he hadn’t expected. The air wooshed out of him like he’d taken a boot to the ribs. His hand dropped from her face to the sand, suddenly supporting his weight. It was his fault, all over again. All his. Staring blankly at the marks on her legs, Sionn felt all the shame he’d seen in Elona’s eyes earlier wash over him.

“Don’t.” Elona’s hands reached out and grabbed his face, tilting it to force him to meet her eyes. “Don’t you dare slide into that self pity. This isn’t your fault, Sionn. It wasn’t before, it isn’t now. If at any point I wasn’t prepared to take care of you, I would have turned you away.”

“But that isn’t right-”

“Sionn-”

“I want to be the one who takes care of you!

Sionn felt tears threaten at the corner of his eyes, and had his head still not been in her grip, he would have turned away. Instead, he was forced to watch as surprise colored her expression, her beautifully full lips forming a soft ‘o’. And then she laughed. That hurt, that bit him down to his soul. His family never believed in him, but now to hear the disbelief from her, the one his soul and heart screamed for, that was the final blow.

“Sionn,” Her voice was filled with a sort of warmth, and Sionn watched her lean forward and kiss his forehead. “You do.”

“What?” He scoffed, and somehow, began to argue against himself. “I don’t. I don’t catch you food, I don’t build a den for you, I don’t-”

“I don’t need someone who’ll catch food for me, and I know how to make my own camp.” Sionn frowned, wondering where she was going with this. “But someone who worries that I haven’t slept, pushes me to seek out what I am, someone who washes blood off of me… I’ve never had someone like that, Sionn. And I’d do anything, everything, to protect you because of it.”

It wasn’t a love confession, but it was far closer than Sionn had thought they were to one, and he felt his heart bloom. She needs me. The me that I am already, not the one I tried so hard to be for my family. It was a hard thing to swallow, that support might not be the black and white matter it is to the foxes in his family, but staring into Elona’s eyes, Sionn was willing to take a risk for it. His heart beat, and his body urged him to do something, except…

Except he had no idea how humans wooed. Sure, he knew it was a complicated thing. Vaguely he recalled something about flowers. He’d seen humans hold hands, but so many had done that, he didn’t know if it was a romantic thing. That was a word he’d heard womenfolk fluttering about- ‘romantic’. What was romance? They were heading to another town, right? Well that’s that. While we’re there, I’m going to figure out how a human romances. Perhaps it was still going too quickly for Elona, but Sionn couldn’t help himself. There was something here, it wasn’t just him, and he couldn’t let it die out.

Finally catching up to the situation at hand, Sionn blurted out,
“Well, okay, but don’t do that anymore.” His eyes flickered to the bag of scales. “We’ll hunt rabbits, figure something else out. I’d rather starve than have you go through more of that.”

“Okay.” Elona smiled at him now, and let go of his head. “Okay. I can do that.”

“Good. So, tonight we-or maybe just I- sleep, tomorrow we hunt. Any idea’s for how?”

~~*~~~*~~~*~~



DP is this: What are their hunting attempts? As a reminder, they have a dagger and a set of throwing knives between them.

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 27, 2016 9:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Awww Yis new chapter, and a sweet one too. ^^
for the DP What I would do with that is try to make some sort of snare trap and lots of them. Maybe Sionn can sniff out places animals frequent and Elona can ready a snare trap there once the Traps are set they can actually hunt and use the snares as backups in case things don't go well. With the traps aim for Small game Rabbits and the like. and for the other stuff go big or go home things like deer. Wound and track. hit it with a throwing knife (thrown by elona) then track it by the blood it drops (A collaboration between the two.) That's about all I can offer Survival tips wize.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 27, 2016 9:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I like the suggestions! but Sionn outright said in this chapter that he's crap at tracking. XD
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 27, 2016 10:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

YAY ROMANCING!!! Learn, Sionn! Learn all the things!!

This chapter was feelsy and precious, and I loved it. Him washing her wounds... Her affirming him. It was just wonderful. VERY well done.

For the DP, I'll be obvious and say that they use the throwing knives. If she prefers a bow, Elona is evidently better with long-range hunting. Throwing knives are longer range than a dagger. Let's do that.
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 29, 2016 1:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote


Dang it! I thought I had responded. XD

I love your writing - your character development is awesome. It really really is! I look forward to more. Keep it up! It's very enjoyable.

Also, I think the DP should be throwing knives. Elona does seem to be better with long range, and, more importantly, I love throwing knives sooo... Wink

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 29, 2016 3:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sionn is an adorable fluff bucket, and no one will ever convince me otherwise.

I love the development of their relationship. It may seem quick on Sionn's part, but it is still a delicate and heartwarming process, and it makes me smile.

So, the dp...Sionn may be crap at tracking, but he is, by nature, a fox, so he must be able to at least tell where animals would be hiding (and Elona can help, too, haha). I say once they find a suitable area Sionn flushes the animals out and Elona uses the knives to take them out. Their best bet might be birds, not only do they provide meat, but they have feathers too and they can be beautiful and sold like Elona's scales (so say, they take down a male pheasant, those are some pretty greens and coppers, and the tails are nice too). Also, if they stumble across any nests, they can collect the eggs and sell them (like quail eggs are considered a delicacy for some people - not sure about this world, but just maybe, lol XD).
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2016 11:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The paragraph of Sionn daydreaming by the fire was super cute XD. I'm also enjoying how the possibility of Elona abandoning him keeps cropping up and haunting him (and how it seems clear that that's pretty much his own insecurity causing it, probably regardless of what Elona does). As for the DP, it seems fairly obvious that they'll have to use at least the throwing knives (doesn't seem to be much stopping them from using the dagger as well, if it turns out to be convenient). Since Sionn is crap at tracking and Elona's an experienced hunter, I can see Elona finding the prey and leaving most of the actual killing to Sionn (or both of them killing).
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 31, 2016 2:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Huzzah for catching up!

Alright, some sweetness ensued while I wasn't looking and now they have a hunting spree to attend. Firstly, only a few typos.

Chapter Eleven:

Quote:
In a natural, almost absent minded gesture, Eloan continued to stroke the top of the fox’s head.


Chapter Twelve:

Quote:
This focus was why he knew, down to an instant, when he plan had failed.


Chapter Fourteen:

Quote:
““I'm going to go find the river to refill the canteen.”


Quote:
Her mouth was open, light she was going to defend herself, but no words came.


I'll let you figure it out. Wink

As for the hunting. every comment and suggestion regarding it is valid and yes, throwing knives seem to be the best option. Alas, there are a few ways to skin a cat so to say. I would suggest a snare trap, but a good snare trap would require no overwatch. Just set it up and anything that gets caught is done.

But, that can go both ways. If Sionn can make a snare trap, then he could do it by himself while Elona goes hunting game. He also has instinctive knowledge of where animals have their dens, as someone said. So my suggestion is to divide the chores and split up. Gaining ground and gaining time all in one shot.

Kudos for the splendid writing progression, character development and soaring quality! Have fun writing! Very Happy
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 31, 2016 3:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you! Chapter eleven is about when I started getting too impatient to let Sapph give it a read through before posting to if, and you can definitely see the increase in typos from it.

So many of you guys are suggesting snare trap, that I'm going to have to research what that even is. Whoops! XD

Anyway, 24 hour heads up for any who are still interested in commenting before I poll!

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 02, 2016 6:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Poll is up! Sorry it took longer than expected- my cough returned with a vengeance.

I'm not sure how long I'll leave it up for, but there's a minimum of 24 hours.

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PostPosted: Sun Mar 20, 2016 3:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sorry it took so long to get this up guys, been pretty sick and lost the rhythm. Glad to be back, though!


Chapter Fifteen


The warmth of his hand on her knee was almost as soothing as the chilled sweeps of the damp handkerchief. Elona remained still, sure any motion would dislodge him. Discouraging him was the last thing on her mind, even as the sweetness of the gesture made tears spring to her eyes. His touch was so gentle, so caring. Elona had been wounded before, had vigorously scrubbed as quickly as she could to get her scaled over skin clean and covered. That was nothing like the sensations she felt now. Her shoulders, stiffened with fright over Sionn’s possible reactions, slumped. He was caring for her. She’d slowly begun to accept that he, her friend, cared about her. She even knew she cared about him, and as such protected him, and was going to provide for him. Never had it occurred to her that someone caring about her meant they would look after her, or worry about her wounds.

Elona’s hand, pressed into the bank for balance, lifted to cover her mouth. Her lips were trembling with a rush of emotion, and Elona didn’t want Sionn to see it. It was a moot point, though, because the moment he lifted his gaze to hers, Elona felt the tears that had been building spill over. Silently, they slid down her face. I matter to someone. What am I going to do? There was a pressure to that, a responsibility. Before, when fading off the face of the earth would cause no pain, her every action was solely made with herself in mind. Now, suddenly, the prospect of properly caring for herself- as she was beginning to accept she hadn’t been- was an enormous weight. As Sionn lifted his hand up to her cheek, gently wiping away a tear, Elona felt the emotion bubble up in a hiccup. An enormous weight, She thought as she turned her head into the contact. But a worthwhile one.

“Elona?” His voice was as soft as the gentle touch of his hand.

“Sionn…” Some part of Elona still wished he didn’t have to know, but it didn’t seem right to withhold her motivations. “Without my bow, I can’t hunt. Which means no income. So, I have to support us like this for the time being.”

Easily hearing the soft whoosh as he let out a startled breath, Elona watched as his hand dropped to the sand. It was no trouble to follow his gaze either, as it dropped back to her leg. At first, his eyes held only pain, but then a sort of bleakness seemed to seep the vivid color from them. Alarmed to see the vivid amber turning such a blank brown, Elona reached out quickly.

“Don’t.” The word slipped from her mouth scant seconds before her hands unbidden, snagged his face and turned it towards her own. “Don’t you dare slide into that self pity. This isn’t your fault, Sionn. It wasn’t before, it isn’t now. If at any point I wasn’t prepared to take care of you, I would have turned you away.”

Even as she spoke, Elona realized the truth of her words. Before, when Sionn had all but pleaded to accompany her into the forest, she hadn’t believed his boasts of his hunting skills. It was when he’d stopped trying to persuade her, and had appeared to diminish right before her, that he’d first struck a spot in her heart. He’d looked so resigned to rejection, so ready to be shoved aside. At that moment, remembering how often she’d felt the same, Elona had accepted. Then, she’d thought she’d be escorting him for merely a day, but she’d still felt the buzz of protection that shot through her like lightning now.

“But that isn’t right-”

“Sionn-”

“I want to be the one who takes care of you!” Sionn interrupted her, as if he couldn’t bear to hear another word.

The vigor drained from Elona, and for a moment she just stared at Sionn. It took a mere instant for Elona to recall so many times that, in retrospect, he had been caring for her. Despite that, Sionn thought he wasn’t? Sionn had single handedly managed to remind her to value herself, had proven to her that others could come to value her as well, and yet he didn’t think he was taking care of her? The ridiculousness of the situation caused a soft giggle, but it was quickly followed with words Elona could only hope would convey things she was only starting to realize herself.

“Sionn,” Elona was surprised her voice could sound so… loving. Surprised or not, though, she didn’t fight it. In fact, she followed it into an impulsive kiss on Sionn’s forehead. “You do.”

“What?” Sionn scoffed, and began babbling denials. “I don’t. I don’t catch you food, I don’t build a den for you, I don’t-”

“I don’t need someone who’ll catch food for me, and I know how to make my own camp.” Elona continued, trying not to let Sionn’s confused frown deter her. “But someone who worries that I haven’t slept, pushes me to seek out what I am, someone who washes blood off of me… I’ve never had someone like that, Sionn. And I’d do anything, everything, to protect you because of it.”

Sionn went quiet, plainly lost in thought. Elona managed to keep quiet by biting into the side of her tongue, never once breaking eye contact. The vivacious spark she was already so used to seeing in Sionn returned, lighting up his face. His expression still serious, he appeared to have come to some sort of conclusion. Much as she wanted to press for it, Elona held back. She’d selfishly dragged more out of him than intended already. No need to pressure him for yet more.

“Well, okay, but don’t do that anymore.” His meaningful glance towards the bag of scales was enough of an explanation. “We’ll hunt rabbits, figure something else out. I’d rather starve than have you go through more of that.”

“Okay.” Smiling, Elona finally loosened her grip on his head, and pulled her hands away. “Okay. I can do that.”

“Good. So, tonight we-or maybe just I- sleep, tomorrow we hunt. Any idea’s for how?”

“... Maybe. I know you were boasting, but how good are you at hunting?”

“Ah…” Sionn’s voice faded off, and he glanced away, looking rather embarrassed. “I’m… not very good at tracking. I’m good at taking the prey down, and somewhat at catching it if it’s not too quick for me, but-”

“That’s alright, I’m proficient at tracking. I can’t throw knives at what I can’t see, though.”

Elona was beginning to have an inkling of an idea for how they could hunt. Rabbit pelts and the such would sell for very little, but at least it would keep them fed for now. Glancing at her still exposed limb, Elona reached for her pushed up pant leg, sliding it back down. Elona picked up the small bag of scales, tying it shut and slipping it back into her pack. It was an easy way out, and as long as she didn’t do it often enough that it aroused suspicions, it was quick money. Good things came to those who exerted effort though, didn’t they? Elona couldn’t imagine what effort she’d gone through to earn Sionn’s companionship, but she knew she would do her best not to abuse the gift.

Though Elona was braced for Sionn to question her on her decision to keep the scales, he said nothing. For a moment, Elona didn’t look at him. His gaze would reveal his opinion on the matter, and if it was fervent enough, it might alter hers. They couldn’t afford that. She’d agreed not to pluck more, but that didn’t mean they didn’t need the buffer provided by the ones she’d already plucked. It was only when she’d pulled her boot back on, and pushed her feet, that Elona dared look at Sionn.

He was still kneeling on the riverbank, his knees making deep depressions into the damp, loosely-packed dirt. He looked up at her, the moon shining down onto his face, and for not the first time Elona found herself unable to look away. In the beginning it was only his eyes, the deep amber color unlike any other that she’d seen, but now it was his whole face. His features, slightly delicate at first glance, had a hidden strength. His chin had only slightly more point than a gentle curve, jaw wasn’t immensely defined, but if she followed their solid lines it took her to his strong cheekbones. The cheekbones that supported his gentle smile, that were framed by the very eyes that initially drew her in. The features might be more delicate than expected of a man, but the force in which they held her gaze was not.

“Elona?” His voice, sweetly eager, seemed to have lost what remained of the tension from earlier. “What do you tell the people you sell the scales to?”

“What?” Elona blinked, surprised. With how vehemently he’d been protesting, the return of his curiosity was startling. “I tell them I found them diving in the rivers. There’s still a good deal of mythos surrounding them, especially the ones closer to the mountains.”

“Really? Like what?”

Elona extended a hand to him, ready to pull him to his feet, and though Sionn took it, his gaze never left her face. How to explain it all, though? Elona had herself gleaned only a little of the lore surrounding the region, and it all boiled down to races, creatures, that didn’t exist. Fanciful things like dragons and magic, which only fooled children. That, and whoever it was who actually purchased her scales at the market. Surely someone must, since the market’s suppliers was more than happy to purchase them from her.

“I’m not really the one to ask. It’s just a bunch of fairy tales, and I only really know enough to sell the scales.”

“Fairy tales?” Sionn frowned, even as they began to walk back towards camp. Elona watched him, unable to take her eyes away from his thoughtful expression. “Like, the stories humans use to teach their kids lessons?”

“Animalkith do it as well. Does your family-”

“No, our lessons are plainly stated.” Sionn interrupted, releasing her hand- which Elona only just realized he’d still held- and looping his own behind himself. “Stay away from those in human shape, even family. Share with the clan. Transform only when necessary, but be sure-”

Sionn stopped, swallowing nervously, and Elona waved her hand, trying to urge him to finish. “But be sure…?”

“Be sure to fit in.”

Sionn interjected, perhaps a little too quickly. Elona didn’t push. With how much he’d divulged to her already, she could only assume if it was something he wasn’t comfortable sharing, it was important. A rush of what could only be envy coursed through her, and Elona glanced away, unsettled with herself. Was she envious of his sense of family? Or was she envious that there was still so much they knew of Sionn that she might never? Shaking it off, Elona stopped next to the dirt-covered remains of the fire.

“Alright, Sionn. Get some rest.” Shooting him what she hoped was an encouraging smile, Elona knelt down to begin restoring the fire. “We’ll likely have to get up early to hunt.”

“So you’ve figured out a plan?”

“I believe so, yes.”

Though he initially hesitated, Sionn did in fact lay down to sleep. He kept his back to the fire, and curled into a ball. He didn’t appear upset, it seemed like that was just how he was comfortable. Though Elona would have loved to offer her lap to him again, she needed to do a full inventory of her throwing knives, and she needed to review her map. They’d be best if they hunted in a northern path, so that it still took them towards Kelthmar. Thinking of the large trade city and the path that would take them there, Elona tensed. They should be safe from the greatest of the threats if they were where she thought, and could avoid the meat of the western side of the forest. Elona didn’t like to dwell on that, though. The longer she thought of it, the more her heart felt like she should be doing something-

Shaking her head, Elona pushed away those thoughts. She was no hero. Without her bow, she wasn’t a hunter. Hell, she wasn’t even ‘Elona’. Not really. ‘Elona’ wasn’t anything, or anyone rather. Just a misheard word she’d stumbled on, and claimed. Odd, but it’d been quite some time since she’d thought of that. Glancing over at Sionn, Elona found herself wondering how the foxes decided on names. It wasn’t something to dwell on now. They had a minimum three day trip ahead of them, if Elona’s curiosity stuck with her, she’d have plenty of chances to ask. Glancing back at the fire, Elona waited for the night to pass.


~~*~~~*~~~*~~


“You want me to… what?”

“Flush the animals out.” It seemed straightforward, Elona didn’t understand the confusion. “I’ll track down an area where smaller animals seem likely to be, approach silently from one direction, and you approach from the other direction loudly, to direct them towards me.”

Sionn was still seated on the ground, his tail wrapped around himself, as he stared up at Elona. His expression was impossible to read, but if Elona had to wager a guess, she’d pin it down as ‘searching’. What was he searching for, though? She’d been standing, but dropped into a crouch next to him, resting her weight on the balls of her feet. Her eyes level with his, she stared into his and he peered into hers.

“Sionn, what’s wrong?”

“I… Your plan makes sense.” Sionn agreed, but his tone didn’t seem to match the feeling of his words. “It’s just…”

“What? If there’s something wrong, we can come up with something-”

“It’d make a lot of sense for me to do it as a fox.” Sionn broke in, his voice quick and hesitant all at once. “That’s all. And I was trying to figure out if you’d intended it that way.”

“Oh.” The implications sank in, and Elona shook her head, reaching out to place her hands on his shoulders. “Of course not, Sionn. You’ve given me every indication that this is the form you prefer. I’d never expect you to change. Especially not for something as basic as hunting.”

This time, when Sionn looked up at her and stared deeply into her eyes, Elona made a concentrated effort not to mask them. It didn’t come naturally to her to be open, and even as she relaxed around Sionn, often her unguarded moments took her by surprise. Still, if it was what Sionn needed in the moment, it’s what she would do. She stayed like that, crouching down, her balance only preserved by the hands she rested on his shoulders, until he gave a firm nod. Smiling, Elona started to pull away, glad that he believed her.

“I’d rather you not be there when I… shift.”

Elona’s hands were already off his shoulders, so when his words made her lurch, she fell backwards with a loud ‘thump’. Reaching back to rub the ache forming from her hips contact with the earth, Elona gaped at him. But I just- didn’t he see- I tried so hard to make it so he could see how honest I was being, and he didn’t believe me? Some measure of her confusion must have come through in her expression, because Sionn chuckled at her, and reached out to help her back to her feet.

“It’s because you don’t expect it, that I’m okay with it.” Sionn chewed on his lip a moment, before adding, “But clothes don’t… change with me. So I’d rather you weren’t there.”

“Oh!” That was a shock. Sionn hadn’t really expressed any sort of modesty to this point, and Elona had assumed he lacked it. He was an animal, or at least had been for the majority of his life it seemed, so it had made sense. “Of course. Should I stay here, or…?”

“That’ll work. I’ll lead you back to where my clothes are as a fox. I won’t be able to talk, since in that form I am just a fox.”

“That’s okay, I’ll know it’s you. You could never be just a fox.”

The grateful smile Sionn gave her almost distracted Elona from the lingering reluctance in his eyes. She opened her mouth to object, to reassure him her plan would work just as well with him lumbering around in human form, but he turned away, walking towards where the meadow slipped into trees. Falling silent, Elona turned back towards the dirt-mound that had been their fire. He seemed conflicted, but Elona didn’t know for sure. How exactly did he feel about his fox form?

Almost like it had happened years ago, the memory of how Sionn had announced so confidently to her that he was a fox, and wasn’t she in luck, drifted back to her. With everything that had gone on, Elona couldn’t even remember the exact number of days ago that had been. As she waited for Sionn, Elona let her mind wander through her memories of the past few days in no particular order. Enjoying lunch with Sionn, nearly wailing on him with a fire poker, swimming frantically towards him, that moment where she’d had to drop him into the water when she’d solved the riddle. So many different emotions swept through those memories, and yet, looking back on them there was a warmth unfolding in her chest.

Elona felt something brush her leg, but she was so lost in her thoughts that it didn’t register for a moment. Shaking her head just as there was the sensation of something butting against her, Elona glanced down. Standing next to her was, undeniably, a fox. He was much better fed, as his ribs weren’t visible, and his fur looked to have a bit more luster, but there was no denying the resemblance to that fox that had approached her at the fire the previous winter. This was Sionn. Any doubts she’d had had long since faded, but now she was face to face with definite proof that he truly was not only a fox, but the one she’d met. Those amber eyes, arresting even in this face, were proof enough.


~~*~~~*~~~*~~



Alrighty guys, the dp is: How does Elona react to Sionn’s fox form?
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PostPosted: Sun Mar 20, 2016 6:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

First, I just want to say I've eagerly awaited this chapter and am happy that you and it are back Noni. I deeply enjoyed the chapter. Would like to know more about those Fairy tales unless they've already been mentioned and I didn't notice them >.> for the DP I personally squee at the cuteness and then pet the cute fox but I feel at this moment Elona would have a little more self control than me. Possibly, Letting Sionn know that if at any moment he feels uncomfortable that the plan works just as well with two humans rather than with a human and a fox. Dunno what emotion that would be but I feel thats what would be going on in her head right now. and after the (hopefully successful) hunt she gets a bit nostalgic and more attached to him.
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PostPosted: Sun Mar 20, 2016 6:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Glad to hear it! And no need to limit yourselves to suggesting emotions. reaction does have action right in it. ^^

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PostPosted: Sun Mar 20, 2016 9:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

So many things 8D. First off, though--WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE MEAT OF THE WESTERN FOREST o___________o. Are the animals there all poisoned somehow but living through it? Is it contaminated? If so, why and by what? (It occurred to me as I started typing that by "meat" you could've just meant the "bulk of" but I hope not because contamination interests me XD.)

I think my favorite part of this chapter was Elona's reactions to watching Sionn decide to do a thing he wasn't totally comfortable with doing for both of their sakes but I feel like more Elona's than his? ('Cause part of the reason they're hunting together is so Elona doesn't sell her scales.) It's satisfying to see her on the other side of one of those situations after how much Sionn's worried about her. Also really liked that Sionn asked what Elona told her buyers 'cause it seemed like such an obvious question, yet it hadn't occurred to me, so it was a neat surprise. And the passage where Elona was realizing that mattering to someone was a weighty responsibility and going over that in her mind was also cool to read because it seemed to show/emphasize that the things that make her sell her scales/not take good care of herself haven't magically gone away just because someone loves her---she still has to deal with them, she just has more motivation to do so with Sionn around.

As for the DP--it seems like she's already reacted by recognizing him and accepting that recognition? Although I guess she hasn't reacted in a way Sionn can see so she should probably do something Sionn will recognize as acknowledgment that he's still him. Probably shouldn't like pet him or something like that because that might come off like she sees him differently in animal form. Maybe she should talk to him or something like she would if he was in human form (though not something that requires a verbal answer--"You ready?" or something like that.)
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 21, 2016 8:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Glad to see a new chapter, Noni! And might I say what an awesome job you did.

There were a lot of things I really liked, first and foremost being Elona's recognition of how much she cares for Sionn (which is to say a lot lol), and how that affection is reflected in her actions towards him and how she observes him. She seems to be gradually taking more and more notice of him, and that's really telling considering how she was much more aloof when they first met (in his human form anyway).

I, like Adryrn, want to know about the meat of the western forest - what lurks there, why is it so important to avoid, will some unfortunate turn of event have them traveling there? (my brain says "how dare you even suggest that" but my heart is like "yassss they must go, the dramaaaa" XD). And, like ModelP, I want to know some of them fairy tales, girl. Hopefully we'll come to learn them, or at least the one involving why Elona's scales are so valuable, in time - whether by Elona telling us or by Sionn finding out someway else.

I also like the little tidbit you threw in about Elona not actually being Elona's true name. I'm sure this has something to do with who/what she is, and her lack of memories in regards to that, and now I am even more curious as to Elona's origins.

For the DP...while I would want to squeeze the life out of the adorable little muffin that is Sionn in fox form, I don't think that's quite to Elona's character, so instead I'm going to build on ModelP's suggestion and say that she gives him a reassuring smile before doling out instructions for how they'll go about the hunt. I think keeping a semblance of normalcy, like Sionn is important to her regardless of form, will help Sionn be more comfortable as well.
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 23, 2016 2:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

So that's three suggestions so far! I'd like to wait for a few more posts before putting the poll up, but we'll see! I'm gonna go ahead and put a tentative 24 hour notice 'til the poll goes up!
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 25, 2016 11:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Poll is live, people! Since it's so few options, probably only going to leave it up for two or three days. Vote quick!
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PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2016 9:21 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

SQUEE!!!

I'm late. I know. Apologies. I loved this, though. For the DP, I would agree with everyone and say that she carries on as normal to prevent Sionn from feeling more uncomfortable. Great chapter, Noni!
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 30, 2016 1:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Closing the poll in a few hours, comment while you can!
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 31, 2016 12:21 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

How does Elona react to Sionn’s fox form?
Reassure him that the plan doesn't require him to be in fox form if it leaves him uncomfortable.
16% [ 1 ]
Talk to him the same as she would were he in human form.
66% [ 4 ]
Maintain a semblance of normalcy, and begin discussing the hunt.
16% [ 1 ]
Total Votes : 6
Who Voted: Adryrn, AliceRose, Andolyn, kkdestiny, ModelP, Seraphi



Chapter Sixteen



“That’s okay, I’ll know it’s you. You could never be just a fox.”

Covered by the trees, Sionn stopped to let the words roll around in his brain. Was he just a fox? He certainly wasn’t human, and even though he’d once wanted so badly to be, Sionn thought being not-human, not-fox wouldn’t be so bad with Elona by his side. Still, there was no denying a surge of equal parts nerves and exhilaration. It’d been quite some time since he’d shifted into a fox form, breaking the rule he’d nearly blurted out to Elona. Transform only when necessary, but be sure to transform often enough. By waiting so long, he was about to subject himself to quite a bit of pain and effort.

Leaning against a tree for a moment, Sionn reached down to pull off his boots, and the socks beneath. Instantly spreading his toes out, Sionn stretched his legs. Their ability could only be described as some form of magic, as even they couldn’t fully explain how it worked. Sionn removed the rest of his clothing without ceremony, folding them and placing them neatly on the ground, partially hidden by a bush. No need to dare someone else to happen across them. Crouching down, standing naked in the woods, Sionn swallowed, and braced his hands against the ground. He didn’t have to adopt this posture to transform, but it sure would help ease the transition.

Closing his eyes, Sionn pictured his fox-self clearly, feeling a rush of fire in his veins where there would usually be a gentle heat. Gasping out, Sionn winced, already feeling the pain of his decisions. Digging his fingers into the dirt, the underbrush biting at his palm, Sionn focused on his paws. What would normally take an instant, would occur all in a rush, was happening limb by limb. Gasping out, and dropping his head to the ground, Sionn panted. He couldn’t stop, even as the agony washed over him. He had to picture one form or the other, being caught too long in transition could kill him. Red fur, white, black, covering his slim body- focus- whiskers, don’t forget the whiskers, his nose, his face. Arms and legs, all slim, with well-defined bones lined in sleek muscle.

For a moment, all Sionn could muster the energy to do was lay there on the forest floor, struggling for consciousness. His exertion left him slipping towards unconsciousness, but Elona was waiting. Thinking of her, picturing her as she waited by the fire, gave Sionn the strength to open his eyes. The forest was different, now. The lush greens and lovely forestry had been lost, his fox eyes unable to fully process them. It was odd, considering Elona’s comment that he had the same eyes, that they remained the same in appearance when he saw so much less like this. Unless it was dark, then he could see almost endlessly.

Pushing himself up, and staggering only slightly, Sionn trudged back towards the camp. The further he walked, the more energy he seemed to regain. Blissfully, it seemed he’d chosen to transform just in time. Much longer and… Sionn didn’t wish to think on it. Spotting Elona, Sionn felt happiness bloom inside him, and he sped up. She was staring slightly blankly into distance, so Sionn gently rubbed against her leg. She didn’t seem to immediately react, so with rather more force, Sionn headbutted her leg. She blinked, snapping out of whatever trance she was in, and her gaze downturned to look at him.

For a split second, Sionn was back in the past, sitting at her feet as the snow fell softly around them. He had stared adoringly up at her then, and he likely was now, as well.

Holding his breath, Sionn waited. Even though he couldn’t currently see the lovely pale green of her eyes, he pictured it perfectly as he waited for her reaction. What would she do? What did he want her to do? Though it’d always been imperative to appear as if he was any other fox, Sionn hoped she could easily see through it. At the same time, when he remembered the way she’d caressed his head, Sionn longed for more of that contact. Which do I want her to see? The man, or the fox?

“Welcome back, Sionn. Lead the way.”

Her smile wasn’t any different than usual. Warm and gentle, almost as if she wasn’t used to the sensation of it, and paired with completely direct eye contact. Does she see the man? Sionn tipped his head in a nodding gesture, and turned back the way he’d come. As Elona followed behind him. Sionn again pondered what he wanted her to see. The man or the fox? They found his clothes quickly enough, with Sionn nudging the bushes aside with his muzzle.

~~*~~~*~~~*~~


Listening closely, Sionn glanced around him. Elona had led him to an area that seemed- from her observations- to get a lot of traffic from smaller animals. Silently moving forward, Sionn felt the shift of ground under his paws. With a sharp motion, Sionn turned his head towards the source of a pattering sound. Leaning forward, Sionn spotted a flicker of motion. Almost smugly, and extremely proud of himself, Sionn leapt forward, crashing through the brush now. A rabbit burst out of the bush, streaking off in zigzags. Had his face been able to do it, he would have smirked. That was the direction Elona was hidden in. The slight whistle of a knife was easy for his ears to pick up, but the rabbit, unfortunately for it, didn’t react quickly enough. In an instant, it slumped to the ground, the glint of a small dagger sticking out of it’s still form.

A few rabbits, one much easier transformation, and some cooking later, and Sionn was eating some cooked rabbit chunks off a stick. Elona had dressed the rabbits, done something to help preserve the pelts, and wrapped them in a large piece of cloth that had thankfully survived the river. Seems like she mostly just lost food, and some trinkets. Sionn felt a momentary stab of guilt, but shook his head and ate more rabbit. Elona was next to him, eating off of one stick while holding another in her other hand, rotating it to cook them evenly.

“This is nice.” Sionn murmured, staring unabashedly up at her. “Thanks for cooking.”

“I suppose you didn’t used to get cooked food often, huh?”

“Nope. Though, we are warned when we’re young that our human form seems to require it more than our fox one.”

“Hmm. I wonder how much your insides change, then.”

The conversation gradually drifted away from the topic of Sionn’s form, and turned to lighter matters. They discussed what had worked in the hunt, what hadn’t, and what their options were for the next day. They had hunted in a northern, to north-east direction, heading towards where the star had been on the map. According to Elona, if they hunted each morning, ate their fill, and nibbled on the leftovers and berries throughout the day, they should arrive at Kelthmar. The name sounded vaguely familiar, he’d likely heard it on humans lips as they traveled, but Sionn wasn’t sure what to expect.

“So what’s Kelthmar like?”

“It-...” Elona broke off and rubbed the back of her neck, plainly struggling with something. “It’s not… I wouldn’t-...” She sighed deeply, and Sionn leaned back a little as she riveted an intense gaze on him. “It’s dangerous. Especially… Especially for you. There’s a high population of Animalkith, and as such, there’s a large number of people there who prey on them. While in Kelthmar, even just as we get near there, you need to stay very close to me.”

“Oh.” Sionn glanced towards the fire, conflicted. On one account, here she was protecting him again. On the other, Sionn already knew first hand the prejudice faced by Animalkith, and just because he secretly could actually turn into a fox didn’t mean he’d be spared. Wait. “Won’t you be- I mean-”

“Some of the places that I used to stay or trade at will turn me away because I’m in the company of an Animalkith,” Elona stated, more or less correctly guessing what he’d been trying to say. “But… Well, I shouldn’t have been using those places anyway.”

There was guilt in her eyes, and that surprised Sionn. Her expression wasn’t too far off from when he’d asked her if she thought she was ruthless. Distant and misty, with a sheen of guilt and sadness. Resting a hand on her shoulder, Sionn leaned forward, thrusting his head into her field of vision.

“Hey. Don’t worry about it. You were just trying to survive as best you could. It’s not on you if they were-”

Sionn broke off, unsure of what word he was looking for. He didn’t have to finish, though, because Elona lightly touched her hand to the top of his, and gave him a weak but grateful smile. Flickering a glance at her hands, Sionn noticed she had discarded an apparently emptied stick. Surprised that she’d finished eating already, Sionn returned his eyes to her face. Instantly, he noticed her fatigued expression. She looks tired again. Sionn ignored the touch of worry, trying to pretend he wasn’t hoping she was going to try to sleep that night. Still, if she had a nightmare again, that wouldn’t really help things. Reaching out, Sionn lightly rubbed his thumb over the purple marks forming under her eyes.

“Are you going to try and sleep tonight?”


~~*~~~*~~~*~~



DP: How does Elona pass the night? Does she try to sleep? Stay up? Wander around the camp? Watch Sionn like a creeper? The options are endless!

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PostPosted: Thu Mar 31, 2016 12:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Another top notch chapter, Noni!

Holy bejeezus, Sionn, transform more! As charming as he is in human form, there are many pros to being able to shift back and forth. And being in pain each time won't do. So, yes, more romps as a fox XD Loved that detail, btw, that he can't just transform willy nilly, that there is a price to pay should he remain human too long.

For the dp...I say since Sionn did so well to go out of his comfort zone and transform for Elona's sake, that Elona should try to get at least a little shut eye for Sionn's. Sure, it didn't turn out to great last time, but things might go differently this time around.
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PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 1:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

... I am so happy you saved Sionn's perspective for after Elona's. I love how it emphasizes how much Elona is totally unaware of about Sionn's ability to transform without you ever having to explicitly mention it. The description of the transformation itself was also fun to read. I also liked how Sionn seemed kind of fuzzy and distant while they were eating. He still noticed some details (like how Elona was tired), but he wasn't tracking everything as closely as usual and his consciousness seemed to jump from thing to thing instead of paying attention to as many details in the moment as he usually does (or at least the narrative does). (Not sure if any of that was intentional, but if it wasn't, it still worked well.)

As for the DP, Elona knows she should take better care of herself for Sionn's sake if not her own, so I think it would make sense for her to at least try to sleep.
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PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 6:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Excellent chapter, Noni! Firstly, I should really once again thank you for introducing my to this site (and for persistently messaging me after you told me about it until I checked it out- reasons not to tell me to do things when it's late night/earlier morning here lol)

Okay, now that all that's been said, here's my thoughts on this chapter. I really love Sionn, and this chapter just added to that. Knowing more about his transformations was really cool, and I like how there's still things Elona doesn't really know about his transformations. As for Elona, I think that maybe she should at least attempt sleep, but if she can't maybe she just spends the night in thought
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PostPosted: Wed Apr 06, 2016 2:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

So far everyone seems to mostly be agreeing. Anyone wanna put up any alternate ideas before I begin work on the next chapter?
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PostPosted: Wed Apr 06, 2016 4:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Love the new chapter. I liked getting the new details on Sionn's transformation. I also liked Elona's ignorance of it, but I don't think it will stay. She's a hunter. She's going to have noticed the marks on the ground from him digging his fingers into the dirt and such. She may not ask right now, but I think the fact it was a struggle will become apparent.

Anyway, for the DP, I agree with everyone. I say she tries to sleep for him.
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PostPosted: Sat Apr 16, 2016 7:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Since everyone agreed, I went ahead and wrote the next chapter! Sure hope there isn't any objections.

Chapter Seventeen


She was bundled tightly against something, water streaming over her as they swam quickly. Her head was bowed, her vision obscured, but streams of light burst and faded into view in an assortment of colors. Below them, caught only out of flickers of her eyes, was a spiderweb of glowing turquoise lines along the seafloor. Panic gripped her body, and she cried out, wanting, craving, the deeper waters and the protective cocoon of darkness. Where were they going? Why were they being pursued? Turning so quickly that her head snapped with the motion, Elona got a very brief impression of large bodies moving as fluidly through the water as the slimmer, long one that clutched her like a precious jewel.

Her head was pushed back into the squish of flesh, Elona helpless to resist. The water wasn’t hugging her the same way it did below, and Elona felt desperately lonely as the pressure lightened, feeling as if the water that still kissed her skin had rolled away completely. Light, true light, began to burn against her eyes, and Elona squeezed them shut. There was another desperate turn, this one forcing Elona even closer to the body, and tremors began to overtake her. Something was wrong, gravely, gravely wrong. The figure that held her murmured something, but Elona’s blood was rushing through her ears far too loudly to hear, and then suddenly even the figure wasn’t hugging her. The arm that still supported her dipped lower, before launching her upwards. She broke through the water-


Sitting up with a tortured gasp, Elona dragged a hand over her eyes, trying to delay the inevitable. Sionn, with his damnably astute fox ears, would be rising and checking on her. She had seconds, mere moments, to compose herself. The past two nights had gone much the same, since Elona had agreed to attempt sleep. It was dangerous, but she attempted it only when Sionn also slept. It cut into her heart to know that while she fought in her dreams Sionn worried for her and fretted. Moving her hand away, Elona gave a weak smile to Sionn, who was in fact kneeling near her.

“Elona?”

“More of the same,” Giving what she hoped was an encouraging smile, Elona sat up the rest of way. “I’ll be alright. Get some more rest.”

He frowned, but Elona didn’t let it bother her. She reached forward and pat the top of his head gently, and Sionn got the hint, laying back down. They had slept curled around the dying embers of the fire, which had now cooled. Though it was still early autumn, there was the scent of frost on the air as the sun began to rise. I must have slept longer than I supposed. Not daring to hope in the validity of her recently adopted practice of forcing herself to sleep through as much of the nightmare as she could muster, Elona pushed to her feet and began to stretch. She sat on a large log she had dragged nearby for such a purpose the previous night, and allowed herself time to ponder.

They were just inside the edge of the forest, and the south-western section of the trade city Kelthmar was a half a day's walk from where they rested. They had managed to avoid the lurking threats of the forest, at the least, but the more obvious ones of the city might endanger Sionn, and to a lesser degree herself, even greater. Elona was lost in thought, staring deep into the trees in the direction of the town, when she felt fingers brushing through her hair. Jumping, Elona glanced behind her,. She wasn’t as surprised as she’d expected to be when she saw Sionn, his hand still aloft. He gave a sheepish and slightly sleepy smile, and Elona merely waited to see if he’d explain.

“I wish you didn’t have to dye your hair over again.”

Truth be told, Elona disliked it as well. The muted brown color didn’t seem to suit her, but when she had discovered a packet of dye that had mercifully been spared the wrath of the water not once but twice, Elona hadn’t hesitated to use it. Her hair could pass for a shade of black only at night, and without her cloak to cover it, it would draw entirely too much notice in it’s natural shade of deep blue. Humans did not have blue hair, it instantly marked her as ‘other’. In Kelthmar, other was a dangerous thing to be labeled. She would draw enough notice, with Sionn by her side, to endanger them both. To humans, I am other, and dangerous. To Animalkith, I am human, and dangerous. It’s only to Sionn that I’m not some sort of monster.

“It’s safer.”

“To look human?”

“To fit a label. With navy hair I’m not human enough to be accepted into their circles, but without something more… significant, I’m not considered an Animalkith, either.” Elona paused, hesitant. She had put this off long enough, however, and Sionn needed to be ready for Kelthmar. “Sionn, about Kelthmar…”

“You already said it was dangerous to Animalkith, and to stay close,” Sionn’s bright smile bit into Elona, and she felt a fresh wave of guilt. Why had she only told him part of the truth?

“Being close to me isn’t likely to… to keep you completely safe, either.”

“What do you mean?”

“If… If people assume we are together, there will be…” Elona struggled for the right words, before coming to the conclusion that easing Sionn into this wasn’t going to help. “Kelthmar is not an advanced place in terms of mixed couples. Many humans and Animalkith alike have been treated quite terribly for little more than who they love.” Sionn’s eyes widened, and Elona rushed on, “It’s not a common reaction, just slightly more prevalent in Kelthmar than in other regions.”

Sionn sat up, grabbing onto his boots, and tilted his head at Elona. There was a strange urgency in his motion, like he was trying to restrain himself. Though his head was still much lower than hers with the way they were seated, Elona could make out some spark of liveliness in his eyes. He tapped his fingers against his boots for a moment, plainly searching for words, and Elona remained quiet.

“Then, to prevent those, uh… misconceptions,” Sionn began, reaching up to brush at his mouth, “What do humans do to be… a couple? To express love?”

Elona froze, unsure. She had forgotten how little he might actually know of human society, especially with his impressive grasp on speaking. How long did he say he had been in human society before running into me again? Besides, how was she supposed to fully describe it? She knew a few of the more technical aspects, such as kissing and dancing, but Elona couldn’t fathom how a human might show love. Besides, their best bet would be to avoid as much of a connection as possible while keeping Sionn safe and near her.

“Mostly through touching,” Elona decided on, since it was the simplest and broadest way to encapsulate it, “Holding hands would be one example of something we shouldn’t do.”

“Oh.” Sionn looked disappointed, his ears drooping, and Elona felt a small warmth go through her. He enjoys holding my hand. Surely he must, to look that disappointed that he now could not. Shaking off that foolish line of thought, Elona returned her gaze to the North.

“Are you ready to go to Kelthmar?”


~~*~~~*~~~*~~



Kelthmar was one of the oldest cities in this region, and was appropriately large. The passage of time, it’s position near the Knyduhl River, and the proximity to the trading route out of the Pyetres Mountain Range had given it everything it needed to thrive. That was how Elona had heard it described, but there was no truly defining the city. The Wyder River, the south-flowing river that Sionn had fallen into, branched out from the west-flowing Knyduhl one in such a way as to perfectly divide the city into three parts. Divide truly is the word for it. Elona thought to herself as they approached. Though formally one city, any who spent more than an hour within it’s borders learned the separate names, and lived by them.

Three sections, three lines clearly drawn. To the North of Knyduhl River was Northern Kelthmar, home to the merchants and their guilds, who got fat off the labor they couldn’t see, and enjoyed little more than leisure. Elona had never stepped foot there, not only did she have no purpose, extensive paperwork was required to cross the bridge over Knyduhl from South-Eastern Kelthmar. Elona lacked even a name. Though many locals boasted that there were no such restrictions to the South-Eastern region, there was one unspoken one, and that was to be a human. That wasn’t strictly true. The docks that lined the river always sought cheap labor. The inns and markets, however, set up because of and thriving due to the passage of trade through the mountains to the east, turned away ‘Beastials’. Elona had occasionally stayed at those inns, traded in those markets. No longer. Elona thought firmly, before she glanced to her side, checking on Sionn.

As she continued reviewing what she knew of the city with herself, they were walking through the light brush of the plains surrounding Kelthmar. The hilly nature of the area made travel difficult, except among the most frequently traveled paths. They’d come out of the forest a little farther west than she had expected, so while the edge of the city, built of stone and wood, lay on the horizon, they had to walk east first, find the path, and then arrive at the city in a normal manner. Though it suffered a lack of upkeep in some areas, there was still a modest wall surrounding the whole of Kelthmar, under order of the King of… Elona’s mind failed her. Though individual cities, especially one focused on trade, were pertinent to her, knowing the name of the country she resided in meant little. Shaking her head, Elona decided to focus on what she did know.

“Elona?”

South-Western Kelthmar was divided from South-Eastern by the Wyder River, and that was where they were heading. That was where the majority of the docks, and it’s workers, were located. The Knyduhl River flowed west directly down to Lunula Bay, and Kelthmar thrived on shipping the traded goods from across the mountains down to the ocean, where boats could take them yet farther. The easiest way to make a profit, though, was through the backs of Animalkith. Generally stronger or more suited to labor than humans, they could do more with less pay. Any pay, however, was a boon in this region, and Animalkith poured in every day, hoping to eke out a livelihood on the docks.

“Elona.”

There were dangers, however. Gritting her teeth, and unconsciously stepping closer to Sionn, Elona glanced around her. At any moment, they could-

“Elona.” Sionn sidestepped directly in front of her, and Elona drew to an abrupt stop.

His expression was bemused, but his arms were crossed in a way that showed he was making some sort of a stand.

“Sionn?”

“I called your name three times, you know. And all you did was continue to glare, at the ground, at the horizon, at the ground, and then back to the horizon. What’s got such a sour look on your face?”

“Kelthmar.”

“We’re almost there?”

Sionn pivoted, spinning to look behind him. Despite all her warnings, he seemed excited. Even as she felt the worried throbbing of her pulse, Elona smiled wistfully at him. She’d been excited, too, when she’d traveled to Kelthmar. She hadn’t been able to show it, the grouchy old man would have squelched any positive inclination long before they’d arrived. Nothing more than a debt to be repaid, he’d said. No time to dally, Beast, he’d insisted when she’d stopped in awe. She could understand some measure of his actions, now. Though he’d dressed her as a human, he’d never trusted she could pass as one.

“Elona?” Elona jumped when she felt the brush of Sionn’s hand near her eyes, despite the touch being even gentler than his voice. When had he turned around? “You look near tears. What’s wrong?”

“Ah- Just… just memories.” One day she’d tell him of how she’d earned hunting lessons from a grouchy old man, but for now, she just pushed it away, leaning away from Sionn’s touch. “Let’s go.”

Thankfully, Sionn didn’t push.


~~*~~~*~~~*~~



The wall was the height of several men, crafted in a mix of stone and clay that withstood the storm of time, even if it’s appearance wasn’t weathering it quite so well. The overreaching gate, manned by bored looking guards, was wide enough to allow several people through at once, and Elona and Sionn were a small part of the stream of people flowing inward. It was no larger than anything she’d seen in her earliest memories, but Elona’s feet had stilled when she’d first encountered it. That was why when Sionn stopped, his mouth opening slightly in shock, Elona didn’t immediately prod him along. She stopped as well, letting the flow of people rustle around them, until he’d stared his full. It was a quiet moment, despite the bustling noise of hushed conversations occurring all around them. Finally, Sionn lowered his eyes back to hers, gave a small smile, and began to walk again.

The urge to grab his hand had grown within her at some point, yet another alarming reminder of how much Sionn had begun to mean to her, but for the sake of both of their safety, Elona kept her hands slack and at her side. They passed through the gate with no problem, following the crowd until it reached the first of many town squares. Motioning to Sionn, Elona gestured him to the side. A small measure of the crowd, humans merely passing through to go onto the better, nicer parts of town, continued on, even as all around them Animalkith of all kind dispersed.

This was one of the more precious of neighborhoods in South-Western Kelthmar, as money was more likely to be spent after a long journey the moment the scent of food and drink was on the air. Past this, the cobblestone road beneath them would quickly fade to muck and dirt roads, the homes getting smaller and shabbier. Gritting her teeth, Elona felt a rush of guilt. Though she liked to believe she wasn’t as indifferent to the Animalkith as the humans, there was no denying she had been little better, rushing to South-Eastern Kelthmar the moment she had food in her belly.

When did I grow to be so introspective? Shaking her head and focusing on the task at hand, Elona tapped her fingers on her leg nervously. There was no rushing straight on to where the temple’s map had led them. Not only was it located in Northern Kelthmar, they were both fatigued from travel, hungry, and ill prepared for whatever it might bring. They had many things they needed to do, but where to start?


~~*~~~*~~~*~~


Obvious DP is obvious. Where do they start, now that they are in the city of Kelthmar?

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2016 12:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I feel like there's a teeny, faint trace of snark in some of Elona' interactions with/thoughts regarding Sionn now ("damnably astute fox ears", one-word answer after not acknowledging him trying to get her attention three times) that I don't recall being there before, and I love it XD. It gives me a subtle impression that Elona is measurably (though slightly) more comfortable around Sionn now, and therefore a bit more open (probably without even noticing it). I also liked how Sionn voiced his opinion on Elona's hair---I interpreted it as him being more open, too, in his own way.

As for the DP, I think they should focus on finding food or shelter and take whichever opportunity they see for either of those things comes first. Ideally, they'd find an affordable inn that has food, but then again, no need to make things too easy >D.
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PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2016 6:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

No objections from me, this chapter was awesome!

Elona and Sionn's relationship is staggeringly sweet, and I love every moment of it. The little things, like Elona's comment on his ears and Sionn's comment on her hair, definitely show how close they've grown in the short time they've known each other.

I also really like your explanation of the city. It was concise and easy to understand, and said in a way where the basics are laid out with room for the imagination to fill in the nitty-gritty details. And the tidbits we get from Elona's past/her first visit there were a nice addition as well.

For the DP...it's been mentioned several times by both Elona and Sionn, so I think the best course of action would be to restock the items they lost in the river first. If they should, for some reason, need to exit Kelthmar quickly, it would be best to be prepared.
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PostPosted: Fri Apr 22, 2016 2:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Can I just say how awesome this story is? In particular, I love the writing style. It's simplistic but detailed at the same time. It reads easily and I know exactly what everything looks like from it. Pretty cool. =D One minor suggestion though - perhaps mentioning smell more often would help with the immersion a little bit more. What does the city smell like? Let us know and we'll be even more sure of the environment.

As for the DP, I agree with Seraphi. Restock is good.

Keep up the good work!

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PostPosted: Sat Apr 23, 2016 9:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

So, as I am behind I normally would write what I felt paragraph by paragraph for the chapters, but I'm on my phone so that isn't going to happen. I will say however that I feel for Elona and those nightmares. It's not great to try and rest only to lose it due to the terrors of the mind. Your description of the city was awesome, as I find they usually are, but Wellspring has a point on that smell thing. It'd take it to the next level for sure. Oh, and I like that Elona sees that Sionn is excited and let's him be, since she remembers feeling that way when she first saw it.

As for the DP, I'm not offering anything new to the board. I agree on restocking supplies. Then maybe find somewhere to eat?
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PostPosted: Sat Apr 23, 2016 5:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Poll is live, people! Probably only going to keep it up for a few days, ideally I'll be closing it on the 26th, 27th. Vote quickly!
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 26, 2016 11:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just going to start by apologizing for how long this took. Life's taken lots of turns, I hit like four different levels of writers block, and I couldn't get it to do what I wanted. Finally, I triumphed.


Chapter Eighteen



The first scent to hit Sionn was refuse and baking bread in equal measure. The air wasn’t clear and fresh like in the forest, the very breeze held the faint musty undertone he’d picked up from humans, and a menagerie of diluted animal scents. Sionn could only be happy for the small mercy that it began as a soft impression of a scent on the breeze, increasing in strength as they approached the city. When the scents tried to push in on him, close him in with their intensity, he drew on lessons of his youth.

One of the few abilities he’s managed to successfully learn from his parents was how to isolate the scents from each other. Sorting through them individually, filing away what the source of each one might be, would keep his head from spinning. As he began to adjust, and focus came to him, it was Elona’s undeniable, indescribable, scent that wafted towards him like a knife through butter. Nonetheless, he found himself scrambling for a way to put words to it. It was fresh, clear and sparkling on a level the forest couldn’t match.

Filtering through the other odors, Sionn began to notice the undercurrents. He could tell the baking bread was coming from a building not too far to his east, and the refuse was coming from far north. As the cavalcade of smells associated with a city as large as this threatened to make his head spin, Sionn blocked out all three he’d identified- even Elona’s, as loathe as he was to ignore any aspect of her. Relying on his eyes to follow after her, Sionn began to pick out the scent of separate kinds of Animalkith all around him.

Their scents were unique to themselves, but underneath them all, an undercurrent of the animal the humans would claim they had kinship with. Are they wrong? If Foxkith can hear as a fox does, can smell as a fox does, is it wrong to say they are of the fox? Even as Sionn debated that, he sorted it aside, sifted through the musty scent of the rising dirt, and realized- Elona had veered to the left, ducking into an alleyway. Coming to a stop where he’d been left, Sionn tilted his head. What is she doing? They had been heading towards a building marked by the scent of smoke and metal, the sounds of a hammer to stone, but now she was stopped, and bending down.

For a moment, Sionn’s heart lurched into his throat, as he leapt to the conclusion that Elona had been hurt, but no sooner had he had the thought that he realized what Elona was doing- or rather, who she was talking to. There, ducked against the wall, hiding in the shadows as much as might be possible, was a small child, a Deerkith, Sionn would guess. She had the curved, narrow ears of one, flicking back and forth between Elona and Sionn. [/i]She might even have one of those little poof-ball tails, but it wouldn’t be visible.[/i] Bewildered to why Elona had singled out this child that was plainly trying to fade away, Sionn returned his gaze to her.

Elona had lowered herself into a kneeling position, with one knee hovering just above the mildly grimey ground, and her hand resting on the other. The nurturing kindness in her eyes, softened by her very faint smile, did not surprise Sionn, but it nonetheless stole away his breath and stiffened his spine. Helpless to do anything more than just watch, Sionn drank in the sights.

“Hello.” Elona murmured, softly, and Sionn was struck by how soothingly soft it sounded. While it was reminiscent of the way her voice had gone around him, there was a lilt to it he hadn’t yet heard. “I don’t suppose you’d be willing to play a small game with me? It’s a tradition of mine, but I cannot find a willing partner.”

“Wh-what is the game?” The Deer-child’s voice was soft, careful. She had learned caution, whether it be through life or a mentor, and Sionn felt no small measure of relief.

“It’s simple,” Elona lifted the hand she’d rested on her knee, and twirled a coin dramatically through her fingers. “I flip a coin, and you call heads or tails. That’s all. No tricks, and we don’t even need to travel for it.”

“Wh-why?” The girl’s eyes had leveled on the silvery coin, and Sionn realized that it must be a substantial amount of money to the girl, from the way she’d gone rigid, and leaned slightly away from the wall. Some inkling of what Elona must be planning began to occur to Sionn as she answered.

“Just a custom of mine, that’s all.”

The Deer-Childs reaction struck Sionn as odd. Her mouth opened slightly, and she looked awed, almost. While Sionn truly believed that Elona could have hung the moon and personally polished the stars every night, what reason did this small child have to look at her the same? Seeking answers, as unlikely as receiving them might be, Sionn turned his head back towards Elona as the Deer-child answered.

“Okay.” The strength in her voice had grown a small measure, but she nodded her acceptance as well. Elona’s smile was full of pride, and with a small nod, she flipped the coin. Sionn, even with his fox ears twitching, nearly missed it when the girl murmured, “Heads,” But he did not miss it when Elona, with a decisive movement of her thumb, sent the coin flipping into the air, and caught it deftly on the top of her hand, resting her other hand on the top of it quickly. Sionn and the Deer-Child alike must have held their breath, and Elona lifted her hand slowly, drawing out the moment.

“Oh! Look at that, it’s heads!”

Sionn peered closer at the coin. The side that glinted up to them had an imprint of the sails of a ship, great fluttering triangles layered against one another. That had been one of the aspects of human and Animalkith culture none of his family could come understand, why take shiny bits of metal, and warp them into discs, why even go to the further effort of imprinting images onto them, claiming them as a particular kind of shiny metal disc. Then, to use and hoard these shiny discs in exchange for all else they might need, instead of simply seeking it out on their own? Sionn still couldn’t understand the reasoning behind it, but he had- through necessity- wrapped his mind around the logistics of it.

“It is heads!” The girl spoke with genuine excitement in her voice, a giggle of joy lurking just behind it, masked by a remaining thread of caution. “I called it!”

“That means you win.” Elona declared, reached out to gently take the girls hand and place the silver coin into it. “And this is your prize.”

The girl just stared, open-mouthed, at the coin, before flicking her eyes up to Elona. All the caution and fear had been wiped from her face, and now she was staring at her with no small measure of adoration. Sionn tilted his head, confused at the shift, even with the coin involved, but he had no chance to ask questions. The girl let out an excited yelp, gave Elona a quick hug, and then ran off into the crowd. Sionn stood there for a moment, silent, before glancing back over at Elona. She looked confused, and was touching the part of her shoulder where she’d been hugged.

“Elona?”

“That’s never happened before.” She murmured, still blankly peering at the place where the girl had been.

“You’ve done this before?”

Sionn watched as Elona pushed to her feet and turned towards him, an answer ready on her lips, but a small shriek distracted them both. Sionn’s head shot up, his ears already turning towards the sound, and his body moved to match it. Part of the way down the road, a human man dressed in travellers clothes had grabbed the girl by the wrist and was holding her aloft. Her tiny hand was fisted, presumably around the coin that Elona had given her. Sionn leaned forward, trying to make out what the traveller was saying.

“Little thief! How’d a Beastial like you get ahold of this kinda coin?!”

Sionn stiffened, his head whipping around to Elona. What do we do?

~~*~~~*~~~*~~



You heard him, folks. The DP for this long awaited, muchly writer-blocked chapter: What do they do?

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 26, 2016 8:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Go save the girl, of course! Set the record straight.

Great chapter. <3 I'm glad to see this continuing.
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 28, 2016 2:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I like how you not only payed a lot of attention to the sensory overload Sionn's experiencing from the smells, but also mentioned how he copes with it. (Also, "deer-child"/dear child amuses me XD.) As for what they should do, I would say it's up to Elona to go set the traveler straight on why the kid has that much money since she passes as human (if I recall correctly?) and probably has a better idea of how to talk to people in that city than Sionn. If I were Sionn, I would wait to see what Elona does and follow her leave (and probably pester her/try to persuade her to help if she decides to do nothing for some reason.)
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PostPosted: Thu Sep 29, 2016 8:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

First of all, I'm glad you've gotten out of the clutches of writer's block! We all know that struggle.

I agree with Adryrn on the sensory overloading Sionn gets and how he deals with it! I find it fascinating! Though, we know I find just about everything that has to do with Sionn fascinating.

And can we talk about how sad it is that the Deer child has to be so cautious?! And how amazed she gets at Elona's trick? And I just adore how excited she got!

I say that Elona and Sionn should help the girl! Elona should probably go in first for good measure...
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 5:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just a heads up that you've got 24 hours left to comment! What should they do!
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 6:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Defend, defeeeeend~

Looking human, it shouldn't be too much to clear away the situation and make him shut up by explaining the gift. maybe.....if things get too bad..threaten the guy into peacefulness
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 25, 2017 3:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hmm hmm. I agree with the suggestion, diplomacy before carnage! And if worse comes tomworst, the guards will interfere. But don't strike the first blow.

Surprise! It's me. Life's got better so I was able to return for a while. ^_^
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PostPosted: Sat Oct 28, 2017 2:54 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hey Cyberworm!

Welcome back, but the City's pretty much a ghost town these days ...

Although I check it every week, just in case.

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 25, 2017 4:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I can see that, and it's a bit sad to see it. But tehere's always hope. no? _)
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 25, 2017 4:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sure. The community is still out there, it's just dormant. If I get a great idea for something to do on the site that would generate a lot of interest, I'll try to resurrect the city, but so far I haven't come up with anything.

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PostPosted: Thu Dec 14, 2017 5:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Like Key, I check often. Though not so regularly as once a week. I would love to see the City come back as well.
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PostPosted: Tue Aug 20, 2019 2:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hey there! Just formally letting you guys know that, as an SG, Trailing Turquoise is over. During If's downtime I've been working on revising it into a standard novel. Very soon I'm going to start posting those updated chapters in Linear Lane, along with audiobook versions of each chapter, read by yours truly!
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PostPosted: Wed Aug 21, 2019 7:05 am    Post subject: Read by author Reply with quote

How exciting! Let us know when it's ready. I haven't followed this story, but I'm always pleased to hear about someone publishing a story from IF.
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PostPosted: Wed Aug 21, 2019 8:29 am    Post subject: Re: Read by author Reply with quote

Lebrenth wrote:
I'm always pleased to hear about someone publishing a story from IF.


Sadly no publishing involved yet! The chapters are in Google docs and the audio book is recorded personally and then uploaded to my old letsplay youtube. Still, Trailing Turquoise is a project I'm passionate for!
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PostPosted: Wed Aug 21, 2019 5:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Trailing Turquoise is officially re-started over in Linear Lane! http://www.cityofif.com/forum/viewtopic.php?p=158072
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