|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Topics: 58 Posts: 2567 Location: USA Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2005 7:24 am Post subject: Polling Chp9 |
|
|
The White Witch has passed from the world of the living and into the Beyond. Chakra is trapped in an out-of-body experience, unable to communicate with her friends. The group must decide whether to continue their journey, and hope that Chakra may soon revive and be able to lead them to the Great Knowledge; or whether they should return to Diasis in defeat. To complicate matters even more, the emotionally charged love-triangle deepens as the affection Knute holds for Chakra leads him to protect her, while the obsession Holden feels for Chakra spills out in a cold confession. Before any decisions can be made concerning their quest for the Great Knowledge, the deadly fight between Holden and Knute must resolve. What options are there for resolution?
Chp9 Poll:How does the fight resolve, and Chakra re-enter her body?
1. Asher steps in as leader of the group and physically stops the fighting, while Chakra attempts to contact either Holden or the WWW 1
2. Chakra touches her ghostly horn tip to her body's horn tip, awakening and stopping the fight 6
3. Chakra possesses Holden's conscious body to end the fight and communicate with her friends 0
4. The two fight until one of their deaths seems imminent, and Chakra receives a vision telling her how to re-enter her body 0
Last edited by ethereal_fauna on Fri Aug 26, 2005 4:40 pm; edited 7 times in total
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
kenshin himura Citizen
Joined: 10 Mar 2004 Topics: 1 Posts: 333 Location: in your dreams Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2005 7:26 am Post subject: |
|
|
She could try to get back into her own body.
or chr could try to posess some one elsess body. _________________ Ish yara al-ahdab hadbat-u
(a hunchback does not see his own hunch. -folk saying)
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Smee Revered IFian
Joined: 16 Oct 2004 Topics: 166 Posts: 5215 Location: UK Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2005 7:45 am Post subject: |
|
|
A great chapter - but then, what else would I expect.
The dumping of the body over the cliff seems a little uncaring - I'd have thought she'd have been carried down to the waters edge and then gently laid in.
The out-of-body experience is a great side effect of the casting of Oblivion.
I think she needs to stop focusing on trying to get into her body, and maybe consider trying harder to contact Holden - he seems capable of telepathy - he spoke to the WWW - maybe he could be contacted, and work out away to get her back in her body.
Another idea would be to touch the tip of her ghost horn to the tip of her body's horn - see if that pulls her back in. If it does, then she can stop the fight merely by waking up.
The group has to go on - no point going back in defeat. They haven't lost any fighting people - so the group isn't less strong, just lacking a little direction. Far from defeated.
Just some ideas _________________ The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Topics: 58 Posts: 2567 Location: USA Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2005 8:38 am Post subject: |
|
|
kenshin himura wrote: | She could try to get back into her own body. or chr could try to posess some one elsess body. |
She's going to try to get back into her own body. Although possessing someone else's body while they're conscious might be an interesting way for her to communicate to the group....
Smee wrote: | I think she needs to stop focusing on trying to get into her body, and maybe consider trying harder to contact Holden - he seems capable of telepathy - he spoke to the WWW - maybe he could be contacted, and work out away to get her back in her body.
Another idea would be to touch the tip of her ghost horn to the tip of her body's horn - see if that pulls her back in. If it does, then she can stop the fight merely by waking up. |
I think she just might be a little too pissed at Holden, considering he just basically used her, and then told everyone else it was fine by her. Although his association with such dark magic has given him peculiar telepathic abilities that no one else has- she might be forced into this option.
I like the touching horn tips idea, and hadn't exactly considered that. I could work with something like that, as I'm sure if she woke suddenly that the fighting would cease. _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Reiso Respected Citizen
Joined: 27 Oct 2004 Topics: 17 Posts: 917 Location: Western North America Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2005 9:09 am Post subject: |
|
|
Excellent chapter - I am intrigued by your suggestion that she possess someone else's body, fauna. I wasn't sure she could do that, but the fact that you brought it up seems to imply it's possible - and why not Holden, since she's a bit upset with the man? It would serve him right. But would anyone else believe it coming from him, I wonder? _________________
Sector 17 -- Rebuilding... ... ...
In the desert
I saw a creature, naked, bestial,
Who, squatting upon the ground,
Held his heart in his hands,
And ate of it.
I said, "Is it good, friend?"
"It is bitter--bitter," he answered;
"But I like it
Because it is bitter
And because it is my heart." -- Stephen Crane
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Topics: 58 Posts: 2567 Location: USA Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2005 10:25 am Post subject: |
|
|
Reiso wrote: | Excellent chapter - I am intrigued by your suggestion that she possess someone else's body... |
It was Kenshin's suggestion, actually, and I found the concept rather interesting.
And after Holden's cold-hearted diatribe, I imagine it would be rather difficult for the other's to believe what he was saying. A challenging bit to write, yes. _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Cowofdoom666 Respected Citizen
Joined: 23 Nov 2004 Topics: 6 Posts: 963 Location: Essex, England Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2005 10:58 am Post subject: |
|
|
Another great chapter Fauna, I have a few suggestions....
I think the whole "Speak through someone by possesing them" Idea is a very good one, or....
Does Chakra have any "Material substance" left in their world, to see if she could move a stick and write a message in the dirt or something. OR.....
Maybe Chakra's out of body experience could also help her, perhaps, she is stuck between two worlds? Perhaps, in her current state, she could contact WWW for guidance or help? It's a bit far fetched, in fact, forget I ever spoke.
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Topics: 58 Posts: 2567 Location: USA Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2005 3:13 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Cowofdoom666 wrote: | Does Chakra have any "Material substance" left in their world, to see if she could move a stick and write a message in the dirt or something. OR.....
Maybe Chakra's out of body experience could also help her, perhaps, she is stuck between two worlds? Perhaps, in her current state, she could contact WWW for guidance or help? It's a bit far fetched, in fact, forget I ever spoke. |
Good suggestions. She doesn't have material substance, as she appears to float and passes through solid objects as if she spawned from a mist.
Attempting to contact the WWW might work. She knows she has passed into the Beyond, and I haven't yet given consideration as to whether she could contact someone that is dead. _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
bipin Guest
Items
|
Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2005 10:04 pm Post subject: interesting |
|
|
[hi
i m bipin
i got that u have exellent art of writing
wanaa b my fren
pls
mail me at (edited)
pls do that :!:
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Topics: 58 Posts: 2567 Location: USA Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2005 11:53 pm Post subject: Re: interesting |
|
|
bipin wrote: | [hi
i m bipin
i got that u have exellent art of writing
wanaa b my fren
pls
mail me at (edited)
pls do that :!: |
I am pleased you like my story, but prefer to confine our communications to here, at the City of IF. _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Topics: 58 Posts: 2567 Location: USA Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Sat May 07, 2005 3:54 am Post subject: |
|
|
I've taken the suggestions I have so far, along with a couple ideas of my own, and created the poll for chapter nine. Let's see some voting, and I'm still open to new ideas and suggestions as to how you want to see the next chapter written. _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
kingcappie Guest
Items
|
Posted: Sat May 07, 2005 4:14 am Post subject: |
|
|
I like the idea of Chakra figuring out how to get back in her body, waking up and stopping the fight.
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Muaddib Comrade
Joined: 31 Dec 2004 Topics: 30 Posts: 1765
Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Sat May 07, 2005 6:20 am Post subject: |
|
|
Very good chapter!!!!!!!!
Although the tense change in the opening sentences was a bit awkward. Me is choosing the last option.
Hhahaha Bipin you sick perv.She's a married mom.
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Araex Guest
Items
|
Posted: Sat May 07, 2005 2:41 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Wicked story fauna! I've only just got up-to-date with it.
On the matter at hand, WWW means the Wise White Witch, doesn't it? Or is it some god that I missed out earlier as this might change my vote
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Smee Revered IFian
Joined: 16 Oct 2004 Topics: 166 Posts: 5215 Location: UK Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Sat May 07, 2005 2:46 pm Post subject: |
|
|
It was tempting to go for a good 'fight to the near-death' scene, but went with the horn to horn idea. _________________ The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Cowofdoom666 Respected Citizen
Joined: 23 Nov 2004 Topics: 6 Posts: 963 Location: Essex, England Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Sat May 07, 2005 3:59 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Hey, tell me something, on the storygames that have made their own forums, how do you get the pictures inserted? I'm intrigued how you do it.
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Topics: 58 Posts: 2567 Location: USA Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Sat May 07, 2005 4:02 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Araex wrote: | On the matter at hand, WWW means the Wise White Witch, doesn't it? |
WWW does indeed stand for Wise White Witch. _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Topics: 58 Posts: 2567 Location: USA Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Sat May 07, 2005 4:10 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Cowofdoom666 wrote: | Hey, tell me something, on the storygames that have made their own forums, how do you get the pictures inserted? I'm intrigued how you do it. |
You can insert pictures in the new storygames forums, too. You have to have your pictures already online, uploaded to your own site that allows remote linking (these are usually sites you have to pay for) or you can pirate some bandwidh from existing sites that aren't yours (a practice that is generally frowned upon.) The code looks something like this:
Code: | [img=left]http://www.yourwebsite.com/images/imagename.jpg[/img] |
You can have your image inline with your text by specifying img=right or img=left, or you can have it set apart from your text by just using the img tag. You can't resize the picure from the forum (at least I haven't been able to specify an image size.) So whatever image you upload needs to already be the size you want it. Hope this helps. _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Araex Guest
Items
|
Posted: Sat May 07, 2005 10:28 pm Post subject: |
|
|
i like the idea of horn-to-horn
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Araex Guest
Items
|
Posted: Sat May 07, 2005 10:29 pm Post subject: |
|
|
ooh, an idea - did the WWW kno she was gonna die? as the day before, she gave Chakra her horns..... hmmm....
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
guest Guest
Items
|
Posted: Wed May 11, 2005 9:34 pm Post subject: |
|
|
big needle
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Phang Elder
Joined: 19 Sep 2004 Topics: 25 Posts: 2160 Location: Phang's House of Mints Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Wed May 11, 2005 9:56 pm Post subject: |
|
|
guest wrote: | big needle |
? _________________ Stuff here
Da Huuuuub
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Vampireidiot Respected Citizen
Joined: 02 Apr 2005 Topics: 0 Posts: 932 Location: You don't want to know Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Wed May 11, 2005 9:58 pm Post subject: |
|
|
guest wrote: | big needle |
Umm...don't mean to be rude but what is with the needles? _________________ watch out behind you....
*THUD!!!*
to late........
!!
Hmm...now for a story!
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Topics: 58 Posts: 2567 Location: USA Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Wed May 11, 2005 11:13 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Large needles used for spinal taps. I wonder if he's trying to say something? _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Author |
Message |
Ravenwing Honorable IFian
Joined: 18 May 2004 Topics: 17 Posts: 3750 Location: Virginia Items Legends
Fables
Strata-gems
|
Posted: Fri May 13, 2005 12:54 am Post subject: |
|
|
Excellent chapter, Ethereal_fauna. As always you write an deep, action-packed chapter. A bit short I must admit, but it certainly reveals a lot. But I felt that you did not really explain that Chakra was in her ghostly self.
Actually it wasn't really until I read the offered choices did I know that Chakra was 'dead.' I actually thought that she was still alive, but could not speak or move or anything. I am going for Chakra to end the find between Knute and Holden. She is the one they're fighting over, and I think she is the only one that can end this. _________________ Stories
New Story: Glassbreaker Presently on Hiatus until further notice.
Truthseeker (Completed SGOTM)
Samadhi Traveler 2005 Nano Wrimo winner (53,019 words)
Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
-Confucius
|
|
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|