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Key King
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 12:34 am Post subject: Chapter 8: The Crossroads |
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The next chapter of the featured storygame "The Machine's Daughter" has been posted:
Chapter 8: The Crossroads
Discussion and voting are closed for chapter 8.
For more about the storygame, see the New Players Start Here topic in this forum.
Last edited by Key on Sun Apr 30, 2006 6:47 pm; edited 4 times in total
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saxon215 Guest
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 12:45 am Post subject: |
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good chapter, many possible different paths, very cool. i'll wait to hear what the other says before i pass judgements
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Key King
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 12:46 am Post subject: |
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Here's a larger version of the map, to help the discussion:
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Shady Stoat Elder
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 12:50 am Post subject: |
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Great new chapter. Lots of possibilities.
(BTW, Key, am I being stupid or is the 'discuss and decide' link still taking us back to the chapter 7 topic that's locked?)
It looks like Pilla's found a friend. He may not be trustworthy, but 1) I think the concept of non-trustworthiness would not be an automatic concern for her, due to her lack of experience in that matter and 2) she has no-one else, so she'd be inclined to trust him.
She could continue on her way to see Gorgos in the goatfoot forest - but that was a nebulous aim at best. She was simply running away from what happened between Peran and herself.
For me, the serpent-witches sound a much better way forward. THey might tell her what she needs to know, rather than what she thinks she needs to know.
So far, Pilla's reminded me of the people who asked the question to 'life the universe and everything' and got back the answer '42'. Until she knows what the right questions are, she's not going to find the right answers. It would be great to find someone else who looks like her - but what then? Better to find some people who are prepared to help her and guide her to the end, even if she has no idea what that end may be.
Whatever she decides, though, she might want to be quick about it. I don't think the forces that Nogola turned away are going to wait for long. They'll return with reinforcements and take what he refused to give them.
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Key King
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 1:10 am Post subject: |
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Shady Stoat wrote: | (BTW, Key, am I being stupid or is the 'discuss and decide' link still taking us back to the chapter 7 topic that's locked?) |
You guys are too quick!
The problem is that I can't have the Flash file link to the forum topic until I post the forum topic, and I can't have the forum topic link to the Flash file until I post the Flash file.
So the pages may not link to each other correctly when they're first posted. But it should all be working now.
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Smee Revered IFian
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 4:56 am Post subject: |
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Good Chapter.
He definately seems like a friend, and I agree that he's done nothing that would make Pilla suspect anything from him.
Stoat's reasoning is sound - the Snake-witches are a good bet.
She should raise the concern of money, hopefully he has some savings from the temple.
Happy Writing. _________________ The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the Devil's own Satanic Herd!
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saxon215 Guest
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 6:50 am Post subject: |
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im with smee on atleast one oif those points raise the issue of monkey, but VERY subtly
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Alegria Honored Citizen
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 7:22 am Post subject: |
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Yes, she needs an Ally, but I don't think I yet know enough of this complex world to know, so I would say she would go to Goatsfoot forest. _________________ A writer doesn't solve problems. He allows them to emerge.
-Friedrich Dürrenmatt
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ethereal_fauna Perpetually Distracted
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 7:56 am Post subject: |
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Pilla might not be inclined to distrust, but her limited experience with animals (revisit Peran) might make her pause before giving complete trust. Is he promoting self-serving interests? Does he intend to gain something from her?
She's running away from the negative reactions that she received in Zigoz, but unlikely to harbor lingering resentment over the decisions she made earlier with her animal dealings. But I think she'll be more cautious, and want to remain in more control.
He offered to go with you to search for this other like you. Stick to that goal for now. You can learn much from him along the way, whatever he will share, and perhaps observe and learn effective ways of interacting in animal society from your travels with him. _________________ The maker of a sentence launches out into the infinite and builds a road into Chaos and old Night, and is followed by those who hear him with something of wild, creative delight. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Tazgirl180992 Guest
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 8:55 am Post subject: |
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hard to decide! Both ways has it's own advantages. But i would say to go to the goatfoot forest then maybe head to the serpant witches later.
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jnmrcs Builder
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 10:51 am Post subject: |
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It's a hard desicion but she should continue to the goatfoot forest.
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Ravenwing Honorable IFian
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 4:50 pm Post subject: |
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Wonderful chapter, Key. The map really helped me understand the location of all the places.
Pilla is looking for herself. Whether or not she goes to the Goatfoot forest or on to the serpent-witches she will most likely find something about herself.
What the priest is offering is more attractive in more ways than one. First of all, she has someone, who will get her safely across past Mt. Olympus with his contacts. Second, she is not alone in a world she does not know (a bit like the first, but had to be pointed out nonetheless). Third, she has a better basis as to whom she may be. Pilla could be the prophesized child, and the serpent-witches will be able to tell more.
Finding this Gorgos in the Goatfoot forest seems to have to many factors, which make it unattractive. First, she is going across a land with hostile centaurs. Second, there is no guarantee of safe passage across those lands. And third, she has no hint of whether or not Gorgos would absolutely be there. At least with the witches, the priest would be able to locate them faster. _________________ Stories
New Story: Glassbreaker Presently on Hiatus until further notice.
Truthseeker (Completed SGOTM)
Samadhi Traveler 2005 Nano Wrimo winner (53,019 words)
Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
-Confucius
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Kalanna Rai Assassin for Hire
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Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2006 11:43 pm Post subject: |
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I say head for the serpent witches...the priest said he that the woman who looked like her had a tribe...that means that there might be more of them in the area...
Meanwhile she has consorted with a known Goatfoot outlaw and that might not go over so well as Perrin couldn't have failed to drop a mention or two about her back to his friends in the Goatfoot Forest...
Besides the journey to the witches seems to be one that's much easier and could provide the necessary time for the priest to teach her more, much needed information... _________________ "It's not just about living forever...the trick is living with yourself forever..."
"Music makes you braver."
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Chinaren Hallowed IFian
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Ravenwing Honorable IFian
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Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 5:39 am Post subject: |
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This chapter seems to only have two choices. Well actually three because Pilla could just refuse any offer of help and go off on her own, which would be quite perilous and a bit immature. It's just a suggestion, not my decision. _________________ Stories
New Story: Glassbreaker Presently on Hiatus until further notice.
Truthseeker (Completed SGOTM)
Samadhi Traveler 2005 Nano Wrimo winner (53,019 words)
Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
-Confucius
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Guest
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Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 10:57 pm Post subject: |
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Well, it seems that the option to visit the serpents seems a good one, at least it's good if Pilla can get answers. She wants to know who she is, but in the end she's going to have to accept who she is, and will have to make up her own mind about her destiny. Anyway, it seems a good option.
- D-Lotus
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Mother Goose Respected Citizen
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Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2006 12:29 pm Post subject: |
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Gorgos
Route: hostile, unknown
Person: form like mine; reared by goatfeet; may not know any more than I do; may or may not still be there
Attitude: enemy to Peran
Serpent-witches
Route: known to priest
Person: unknown; reported to know about "children of Taremto"
Attitude: helped Masakati
Logically we should head for the wild lands.
OOC: The priest has obviously guessed that Pilla has been brought up by Zigots, but does not look on her as an enemy but as the beginning sign of the promise.
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Key King
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Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2006 8:26 pm Post subject: |
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Poll's up! Happy voting
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Ravenwing Honorable IFian
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Posted: Wed Feb 08, 2006 4:59 am Post subject: |
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I am going with what I said, and what Mother Goose so kindly listed. The serpent witch route seems to be the best, and also the safest, which probably is Pilla's main priority. _________________ Stories
New Story: Glassbreaker Presently on Hiatus until further notice.
Truthseeker (Completed SGOTM)
Samadhi Traveler 2005 Nano Wrimo winner (53,019 words)
Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
-Confucius
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Mother Goose Respected Citizen
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Posted: Wed Feb 08, 2006 6:21 am Post subject: |
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Sorry, Rave - of course you said it first, and I meant to say that in my post but it got lost somehow. I was trying to put it in somewhat syllogistic form.
(I did think it independently, too.)
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Aino Guest
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Posted: Wed Feb 08, 2006 7:20 am Post subject: Oracle |
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Consult with the Oracle and let the Oracle make the decision.
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Suneila Guest
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Posted: Wed Feb 08, 2006 9:48 am Post subject: |
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I wanted to say go to Gorgos, but the serpent-witch is much more logical, as Momma Goose's list shows so clearly.
~sunny
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UberDemon Guest
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Posted: Wed Feb 08, 2006 10:03 am Post subject: Serpent Bitches! |
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I'm all for searching out the Serpent chicks - from the sounds of things, each race has a human child born to it. We know the Scarpi Human is dead, the goat human is a priest/tramp who's gonna want to get down and make some babies, and if there's a bull head human, he/she's probably already dead or kept in hiding. Maybe it's the Emporer's son? It would be interesting for Pilla to meet him and get some sweet bull head/human lovin.
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Ravenwing Honorable IFian
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Posted: Wed Feb 08, 2006 1:53 pm Post subject: |
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Mother Goose wrote: | Sorry, Rave - of course you said it first, and I meant to say that in my post but it got lost somehow. I was trying to put it in somewhat syllogistic form.
(I did think it independently, too.) |
Eh? Don't worry, I made mention that you mentioned it from post. You gave me credit, do not worry.
Can I just say the guest UberDemon's post seems a bit generalized? We don't really know whether a human is born into each race. It probably is likely, but not something we should assume as truth. *shrugs* There is not much to be said about the post anyways. Other than that, Pilla needs to find more about herself before she meets others that may be like her. _________________ Stories
New Story: Glassbreaker Presently on Hiatus until further notice.
Truthseeker (Completed SGOTM)
Samadhi Traveler 2005 Nano Wrimo winner (53,019 words)
Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
-Confucius
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UberDemon Guest
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Posted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 6:18 am Post subject: Pilla needs friends |
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Actually, I would rather see Pilla meet another of her kind. They can jam about what each has discovered about themselves - which should be interesting, as Pilla has a robot point of view, and another human will have a 'whatever' point of view.
And no, I don't think it's too soon to guess that each tribe has a human born to it. My guess is that this god type person is setting humans back on the world in diff cultures to fix something, or unite some races, or bring about a new age of... something or other. Oh! Or even better, they're sent down to destroy all the crap that the current tribes have constructed, bringing about a new, glorious race of man to rule over all animals and robots and whatevers. Death to the bull head bastards!
By the way - I never figured out if Pilla is wearing clothes or not.
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Ravenwing Honorable IFian
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Posted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 6:45 am Post subject: Re: Pilla needs friends |
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UberDemon wrote: | Actually, I would rather see Pilla meet another of her kind. They can jam about what each has discovered about themselves - which should be interesting, as Pilla has a robot point of view, and another human will have a 'whatever' point of view. |
That is sort of the purpose of the poll choices. I think either choice would have led her to a place that would tell of her heritage. Already we know that she may have had a brother.
Going to see the witches will only further Pilla's knowledge about herself and her kind.
Quote: | And no, I don't think it's too soon to guess that each tribe has a human born to it. My guess is that this god type person is setting humans back on the world in diff cultures to fix something, or unite some races, or bring about a new age of... something or other. Oh! Or even better, they're sent down to destroy all the crap that the current tribes have constructed, bringing about a new, glorious race of man to rule over all animals and robots and whatevers. Death to the bull head bastards!
By the way - I never figured out if Pilla is wearing clothes or not. |
Perhaps. If you have read any of the other Wheel stories that are in the Archives you would see the correlation between this story and others. Those different from the rest are trying to find more about themselves while at the same time trying to do something to save their world.
Although I don't think Pilla has been brought down from the heavans to do major destruction to all things evil. Otherwise there wouldn't be a balance. It is good to have evil things sometimes, or else there is nothing worth living for. Why live in a perfect world? In the end, you will more likely die of boredom. Motivation is very good for a person, whether it be good or bad. _________________ Stories
New Story: Glassbreaker Presently on Hiatus until further notice.
Truthseeker (Completed SGOTM)
Samadhi Traveler 2005 Nano Wrimo winner (53,019 words)
Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
-Confucius
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The Powers That Be Respected Citizen
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Posted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 11:59 am Post subject: |
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Ok, I've caught up on the story. Just one complaint: I didn't like the map as the graphic for this chapter - doesn't fit with the look or continuity of the presentation.
She has two choices and she doesn't know much about either. But her guide has knowledge of one, and that's an advantage - may as well go that way. I think that she will logically arrive at that conclusion as well. _________________ Abduction! is in the Stasis Hall, but read it anyway!
Got a problem? Write to Dear Dotty!
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Ravenwing Honorable IFian
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Posted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 1:14 pm Post subject: |
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Interesting opinion you have there, Powers. Personally, I thought the map was quite useful. It helped me understand how the world was divided, and where everything was in context of the story. So when I was reading over the description of each of our choices, I could look at the map and see what seemed to be the better choice. *shrugs* I guess everyone has their own opinion on such things. _________________ Stories
New Story: Glassbreaker Presently on Hiatus until further notice.
Truthseeker (Completed SGOTM)
Samadhi Traveler 2005 Nano Wrimo winner (53,019 words)
Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
-Confucius
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The Powers That Be Respected Citizen
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Posted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 1:23 pm Post subject: |
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Ravenwing wrote: | Interesting opinion you have there, Powers. Personally, I thought the map was quite useful. It helped me understand how the world was divided, and where everything was in context of the story. So when I was reading over the description of each of our choices, I could look at the map and see what seemed to be the better choice. *shrugs* I guess everyone has their own opinion on such things. |
I have no problem with the map itself (although I don't personally see that it add much value). My criticism was purely aesthetic - the change in look of the left-hand side of the "book" as I went from chapter 7 to chapter 8 was quite jarring. I think there must be a better way of incorporating the map without compromising the overall look of the piece. _________________ Abduction! is in the Stasis Hall, but read it anyway!
Got a problem? Write to Dear Dotty!
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Key King
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Posted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 3:15 pm Post subject: |
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Poll's closed. I'm feeling sick, so I won't be able to put up the next chapter today. Hope to get it up tomorrow.
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Chinaren Hallowed IFian
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Araex Guest
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 2:48 pm Post subject: |
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A bit late on the scene here, but I've just read up on the whole lot.
A very interesting story, and I'm liking the way you are bringing in bits of the Wheel's history that can be related to in the other stories, and just generally linking the whole series together, specifically the bit about Masakati... I remember her . Also, after having read all these descriptions of the Scarpi and their attitude, I can't wait to read the story about the human raised by them.
Not that it makes any difference, but I think we should go to the serpent-people, mostly for the reasons stated previously.
It's good to be back with the Wheel.
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Key King
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 7:46 pm Post subject: |
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Locking this chapter, chapter 9 posted.
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