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To Be A Knight - Chapter Eight: Underground *~*NEW*~*
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 8:50 am    Post subject: To Be A Knight - Chapter Eight: Underground *~*NEW*~* Reply with quote

Prolog


Looking up, I see Master Calib watching me. As he looks down over the edge of the Pahrah, I can only see from his chest up. As always when he watches me, I feel as if there is nothing I can't do. Turning back to my opponent, I reach out with my weapon, touching it briefly against his. I see his eyes flash with the sound of metal-on-metal. With a twist of my wrist, I bring the smooth wood of my weapon flush against my arm and back, one of it's sickle like ends arcing over my head. My opponent places the tip of his sword on the ground in front of him, his thick burly hands gripping the hilt tight. I watch his muscles ripple beneath his thin sleeveless tunic as we wait for the signal to begin.

I close my eyes, focusing on my breath like Master Calib taught me. -Deep and slow, but don't relax too much, because when you do, that's when the final blow will come- The words, thought foolish by me at the time, have time and again saved me from fatal error. Opening my eyes again to the glare of the noon day sun, I take one more deep breath. With a loud clang, the match begins.

_____________


Sitting alone in my chambers, my mind goes over and over the match this afternoon. Twice I came close to losing my head. I slam my fist hard into my other hand. “I shouldn't have lost my temper. How could I be so stupid!? I know better than to fall for those foolish taunts...” I stand up from my small bed and walk over to the only real luxury in my room. Opening the window wide, I gaze across the plains or my homeland towards the arena. Seven years ago today, Master Calib picked me out of a group of children to be his Han, his fighter. A child himself, I doubted his wisdom at first. Now, at the age of seventeen, I see how foolish I was.

I sigh, resting my head on the cool stone windowsill. As a taunak, one with no family, I've been looked down upon my while life... Until I became a Han. People still look down on me for being a taunak, as well as being small for a boy my age, but now their opinions don't matter so much. Only Master Calib's seem to have any meaning for me.

I feel a familiar rush. Spinning around, I look up to my ceiling. Where once was cold stone, I see now comforting face of my Master. His long, slender features at times remind me of the Edans of the north. With his pale skin and long red hair, he could almost pass as one. But one thing would make him stand out like a dog in a horse race. His smile. Warm and gentle, I forget all my woes the moment I see it. “Good match today.” His words of support cause me to bow my head in shame. “Forgive me Master Calib. I should not have lost my head as I did.” I feel warm skin under my chin, forcing me to look up at my Master. He holds his finger steady under my chin, keeping his eyes locked on mine.

“Do not bring yourself down like that. Graceful or not, you still have your head.” His finger brushes softly against my cheek, “and that is all that matters to me.” I nod slowly, feeling a bit better. I turn a tear streaked face away, wiping it clean with my sleeve. The green fabric darkens with the moisture. He always knows what I need to hear. When I look back up at the Pahrah, the window in the sky, or in this case the ceiling, I find I can now smile back at my Master. “Care to visit today?” His high, childlike voice dances with amusement. He knows I never turn down a chance to be with him.

His smile widens as he watches me nod vigorously. Reaching once again through the Pahrah, his warm hand wraps softly but firmly around my middle. I hold the top of his thumb tight as I'm lifted off my feet. As I raise higher, I feel the tingle of the barrier. I squeeze him tighter as he brings me out of my world, and into his...

_______

Hope you enjoy this, and yes, it IS a Sci -Fi
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 19, 2010 12:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

hmm... nicely written and an inviting start. Sorry it took so long to read it... been a bit distracted this week.
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 20, 2010 3:22 am    Post subject: Thanks Reply with quote

Thanks for the look, I got a good idea what happens in chapter one, but it might be a bit long. I hope it's not too daunting when I get to typing it!

I LOVE the "Me" point of view!
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 20, 2010 10:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

good, very good *wise old woman form* Smile I likes it very much and am very excited to see it continue.
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 21, 2010 9:25 pm    Post subject: Chapter 1: Crisis Reply with quote

*I suppose I should put a mature themes warning here. It's nothing explicit, but better safe than sorry, ne?*

Chapter 1: Crisis



The world around me expands and grows. In all directions I see strange objects. Master Calib has taught me what many of them are, but I am still filled with a sense of awe every time I see them. Master Calib, standing almost as tall as the tower I live in, moves slowly over to a table filled with multicolored instruments. A light blue flame spouts from the top of a lamp tall as myself. The flame seems to be warming the brow liquid I often see my Master drinking. Setting me down amongst the numerous glass vials littering the tabletop, he pulls a chair on wheels over to sit nearby.

'There he goes. Needs his drink.' I wander over to the nearest glass object and watch Master Calib out of the corner of my eye. He douses the flame, and pours a good quantity of the liquid into a dark blue mug. Blowing over the steaming top, he looks over at me. I pretend to not notice his eyes following me around the table as I examine the things on his table. He's told me on more than one occasion that he enjoys just watching me. After several minutes, I wander over to the edge of the table closest to him. Sitting with my legs over the edge, I look up into the deep green pools that are my Master's eyes.

The metallic walls behind him seem cold in comparison to my masters taste in furniture. He's told me time and again of how few luxuries people of his status are allowed. “So, they still say such things? Even after all the fights you've won?” My head hangs low as I recall the taunt that had sent me into a rage during the recent clash. ~No matter who you serve, you are still but a taunak! Your Master is a fool for choosing one as low as you!~ Gritting my teeth against the memory, I glance up at Master Calib through my bangs, the silver white mat obscuring much of his face.

'It wasn't so much the insult to me I minded....' “Master. I care not what they call me. I know my strength, and with you, I feel little loss for having not a family. But I can not tolerate when a fool says such things about you...” Looking up fully into his face, I feel my stomach flip as his face shows amusement, as well as something that makes my cheeks heat every time I see it. Resting a finger on my forehead, he brushes my bangs aside. With a chuckle, he says “I see. Well, I am honored you feel so strongly about it, but I'd rather bear a thousand insults than have you die defending me from one fools ignorance.” I nod. At times like this, a part of me, the part that believes in impossible dreams, begins to dance and I feel like a kite in a storm. 'If only...'

A knock at the door brings me back to reality. I brace myself as Master Calib scoops me up and deposits me in the chest pocket of his loose fitting pants. I curl up tight and remain as silent as possible. My being here is not allowed. While Master Calib, and those like him, are permitted to send their view into my realm, such a breach in protocol could end with my Master being imprisoned. I try my best not to listen. Master's affairs in this world are no business of mine. I can not help but perk up when I hear his voice raise, overriding the others words. “I don't care of what has been done in the past! Things must change! Good day Terin!”

I hear master's door slide shut, and my body jostles around a bit as he move around his room. After a full minute of non stop motion, I finally feel the material around me shift. The warm flesh of Master Calib's fingers wrap tight around my middle. Lifted into the blinding light after the pitch black of the pocket, I throw an arm across my eyes as a shield. “I'm sorry my friend, I'm afraid I have to send you back now.” Lowering my arm I feel myself flinch at the look of fury on his face. Striding over to the thing he uses to view my world, and after pressing a few lights, my room appears on the smooth surface beneath me. “Good-bye Master Calib...” I mutter softly as 'm lowered back through the barrier. My feet touch down gently, and I feel Master Calib run a finger from my crown to the underside of my chin.

Looking up, I see a brief return of his warm smile before he pulls his arm back, and the Pahrah vanishes, leaving behind cold stone. Looking about, I see the sun setting beyond my small window. With a sigh, I move to the door, passing through to the hall beyond. Walking down the well beaten path to the servant's quarters, I mentally count the doors on the right. '5, 6, 7, 8 for Shait...' I stand for a long time just staring at the worn gray wood of the aged door. I jump as the door opens. The room's occupant stares at me for a time, then steps out, closing the door behind him. “I saw your fight today. It was amazing the way you moved around the arena like that.” Shait, my best and only friend, chatters on about the match as we walk back to my room. His hand grips my arm just above the elbow, his shoulder length hair brushing against it occasionally.

As soon as the door to my room closes behind us, I pull him into a tight embrace. I hear him gasp, his own arms wrapping around my back. For years now, Shait has been my comfort. I found him in a whore house in the town of Yamesh. He was being beaten for insulting a customer. As I draw him down into my bed, I recall that look in his eyes. That broken, almost dead look of an overworked animal. Using all the money I had earned from a recent free battle, I purchased him then and there. For months, he worked keeping my armor clean and weapon sharp. He would flinch every time I reached for him, even if it was just to pat him on the head in thanks. After half a year, he finally seemed to warm up. It's then that he asked, “If you needed a page, there are many who could a better job than I. Why, of all people, did you choose a....One such as me?”

His body feels so hot beneath my touch. I look up into his flushed face, eyes closed and mouth parted, and smile at the memory. He'd been turned almost completely away from me, ducked down as if to avoid reproach. I had drawn him into a loose hug, his small form had trembled so, and replied with all the truthfulness I could muster, “I doubt there is another person in this world with even a shadow of a chance of being better than you. Nor do I think there is one who would want to serve one such as I with the fervor you do.” I took him to my bed for the first time that night. He insisted on showing me how happy my words had made him. Being the first time for me, I had simply lain there, letting him do as he liked. Ever sense then, many a night found us in heated embrace. He taught me what it meant to please one's body. My mind shifts back to the present. Rolling us over, I chuckle at his startled squeak. Leaning down, I kiss him softly. “My turn...”

_____________

Hours later we lay exhausted on the sweat soaked bed covers. Feeling him shiver, I reach down and pull up the blanket to cover us. He rests his head on my chest, his body pressed close to mine in an effort to ward off the cool evening air. I feel my mind drifting off when suddenly I hear Shait's voice. Cracking an eye open, I ask him to repeat himself. His fingers curl into a fist on my chest. “I said, so you went to visit again today, huh?”A sharp feeling of guilt tugs at my heart at his words. I can hear the faint bitterness behind his voice. Pressing a kiss to the top of his head, I gaze down at the auburn strands splayed out across his slick back. He knows where my heart lies, and I know too, where his does. I run my hand along his side, before pulling him even tighter against me. “Yes, I went to his world.” He buries his face into my chest. Stroking his back, we lay there, silent.

I sit up suddenly, causing Shait to yelp as he falls back on to the mattress. 'What in the seven realms?' I stare transfixed at the Pahrah that had appeared without warning in my ceiling. I can hear crashing and banging coming from the room beyond. I can feel Shait grab my arm, pressing close to my back. “What's happening?” I hear his ask, voice barely above a whisper. I shake my head in response. Suddenly, Master Calib's head appears. I stand, ignoring my nudity, and walk directly below my Master's face. “Lista! Thank the stars you're here! I need you to take this. Guard it with your life! No matter what happens to me, we must continue to move forward. Never forget that!” I feel panic rising fast in my chest.

Master's hand comes through the Pahrah, a small shining device resting on his index finger. I grab it and hold it with one hand tight to my chest. With the other hand I grab on to my Master's finger as tight as I can. “Wait! Master Calib, please! What's happening? What do you mean no matter what happens to you!? Master Calib!” I feel tears pouring down my cheeks as I cry out to my most precious person. He runs a finger across my cheek, wiping my tears, before pulling his arm back through the Pahrah. I scream as I watch an arm wrap around my Masters face. I see his hand come down, and the Pahrah vanishes. I fall to my knees, my eyes staring blindly at the ceiling. Warm arms wrap around my shaking shoulders. Reaching up I grip Shait's arms, pulling him around, I bury my face in his shoulder.

He holds me close and lets me cry myself dry. I sniffle a few times before pulling back. He uses the thin bed covering he'd dragged with him to dry my face. I manage to compose myself enough to actually look at the device in my hand. Running my fingers over the cool surface, I let it across my lap. Like a belt, it has a clasp on one side, and holes on the other. There seems to be metal mounted behind the buckle. The metal has several of those colored lights I've seen Master Calib push on the device that connects our worlds, as well as one large light on the buckle itself. I stare at the device my Master has entrusted to me, and I can't help but start to cry again. 'What in the worlds is important enough for someone to do something to Master?' Shait's cool fingers rest comfortingly on my shoulder, and I reach up, taking it into my own.


*********

So, what shall I do? Play with the device? Leave immediately? Demand to contact the other world and find out what happened to my Master? Anything else you can think of? I hope you enjoyed this first chapter, and I'll leave it up for a good time cause of the holidays. I hope you all a Merry X-mas, and a happy new years!
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 27, 2010 8:18 am    Post subject: Yo Reply with quote

I'ma put little post-its here to keep it on the list of recent posts fer a while, cause of christmas and all. Hope you guys like it!
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 10, 2011 2:19 pm    Post subject: Well.... Reply with quote

- I'm all alone, there's no one here beside me.... - Any one here? I know I'm not that good a writer, but does this story truly hold no interest? *Sits in a corner* I like it.....and for once, I ain't planning anything.. It's totaly open in suggestions here! *Lays down* I'll just be waiting....
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 9:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sorry to have missed this one when you posted it (and even when you bumped it...). I've been around, just a bit distracted with another project of late but I'm not gone. I'd say that's probably the same from many other IFians as well.

Nice to see there's still some life in the city.

So, I must admit, the size variation between worlds was something that I was finding a bit confusing for a bit there but I think I get it now... I think.

Otherwise, I don't think you can blame any lack of writing talent on the fact that we've all been a bit distant from the site as a whole... this often happens around X-Mas and New Years and slowly recovers from there... not unusual. In fact, your grammar, spelling, and imagery is quite excellent really. I'm just having a little trouble with understanding the 'worlds'. For a moment there I was convinced our main character was a mouse or a cat or something, being placed in the master's pocket and all.

Anyhow, he's going to want to do whatever he can to help his master so obviously if those buttons are at all familiar from his master's manipulating the portals between the worlds, he'd do what he can to figure out how to use them so he can get there to offer assistance, even if he is only a couple inches tall in that realm.
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 13, 2011 1:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I agree with TB, try to use the device to get back to the world of the master. Hopefully our size will actually be a benefit because we'll be harder to see. We may need to be concerned that using the device will draw attention to us (as though activating it allows some device to track it).

In any case, I definitely want to go to the world of the giants. We should take Shait too, if possible.


As for the writing, it's brilliant. The flow and pacing is very good, and the imagery is vivid without getting in the way. I never felt lost at all, except that I thought the main character was a male at first... Actually, I'm still not totally sure that Lista is a female. Could you make it clear for us?

The erotic nature of the story is so well done that I found it disturbing, and yet there aren't any real explicit details. I'm very impressed by the emotional response the story was able to create. I would feel more comfortable if I knew the gender of the main character. I was also put off by the descriptions of the characters being very child-like. Not wishing to upset anyone, but just to explain my perspective, it seemed like a love triangle between three young boys was what I was reading. And the description was very well done, to my horror.

One way or the other, some mention of Lista's gender is important. It's in first person perspective, so you'll have to go out of your way to do it. Nonetheless, as mentioned before, the writing is very good and the story should be interesting. Sorry for the delay in response, but like TB said, it's a slow time of year for IF.

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 13, 2011 1:21 pm    Post subject: Well... Reply with quote

Well...I'll answer best I can....The main character is male, age 17, Shait is 16, and Master Calib is 19. This is set in midevil/futuristic setting, so the young ages are kinda on purpose. Boys were almost exspected to be sexualy active at younger ages then. Sorry that disturbes you.

As for TB thinking they're mice...no. The size difference will be tecnologicaly explained later.

OH! And as for size difference, Lista is about 4-5 inches tall. Y'know, action figure sized. But not really...Lista would be about 5'9" in his world. Sorry for all the confusion. It's hard to put too may details in the "Me" point of view without being obvious Razz Wink

Hope that clears some stuff up! And I hope for more suggestions soon! Enjoy!
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 13, 2011 1:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ok then. Well I think I'll continue to read the story, but yeah, the fact they are three young men is disturbing to me. I can't fault you for inaccuracy, as I'm sure there is historical knowledge of such relations in warrior societies. Additionally, challenging the perspectives of modern society is what Science Fiction is all about. Well done.

I still think you should mention somewhere in the story that the main character is male, for the sake of clarity.

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 13, 2011 8:36 pm    Post subject: Well... Reply with quote

Thank you for your notes. I'll take them to heart. Laughing I'm glad you enjoy it enough to read it through your unease.
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 15, 2011 11:18 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have to admit to similar feelings but it didn't bother me per se... but yeah, would be more fair to make the homo-erotica aspect of it a bit more apparent by doing more than inferring the gender of our main character. This aspect doesn't detract me from reading it by any means and I think it may be a nice... challenging... aspect for many readers that keeps them tuned in despite themselves.

Highly agreed that it was crazily well delivered despite lacking in any real explicit detail. In many ways, that was its strength...
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 15, 2011 12:07 pm    Post subject: Thanks Reply with quote

I thank you for your praise. I will make sure to better discribe my characters gender in the next installment. I wanna poll soon, but I stil hear only one suggestion. Thank you for reading it. I'll poll in the next day or 2 *Grin*
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 9:16 am    Post subject: Yo Reply with quote

Huzzah! I found a place in the prolog to fit in the fact that "I'm" a boy! See if you can find it. I'll be setting up the poll in a little bit, so I hope to see some voting!
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 6:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good job. It still flows nicely, but it let's us know that important piece of information.
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 28, 2011 8:18 am    Post subject: Yo Reply with quote

Polls up! How do I proceed? Alone, with Shait, how?!
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 29, 2011 2:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Caught up finally!

I agree with TB and Lebs - the writing is excellent, and the visual impact was very strong.
As a side-note regarding the relationship between the characters - I wasn't so concerned with the need for clarification of Lista's gender, at least not at this early stage. To me we're discovering the characters' traits in the same way that we're discovering this alien world.

We're seeing and feeling everything through Lista - the character's feelings and personality are what makes the character. There was some distinctly male behaviour and female behaviour from Lista, and I would have set it as a challenge to the reader to work out for themselves which gender they were reading as.

Anyway, apologies for not getting to this sooner - I'll certainly be ready and waiting for the next chapter. Smile
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 29, 2011 4:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I essentially experianced this story the same way as everyone else. I became kind of uneasy when the characters began to get intimate between the male characters.

I didn't realize the protaganist was a boy (The evolution Lista gender from my perspective: Male > Female > Male) and I hadn't prepared myself for that kind of relationship. So you managed to surprise me and make me re-read the story a couple times, congrats. :)

Later I rationalized that these organisms are not human, they may not have the same gender types or sexual dynamics that humans do. But still, it was a good twist... really caught me off guard.
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 5:27 pm    Post subject: Poll Reply with quote

Well, I'me sure there'll be no big turn around here as far as voting goes, but I'll leave it up for another day. Who knows?
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 5:48 pm    Post subject: Poll Reply with quote

Alright, here's poll results.

What to do?
Go to Master Calib's World/ Take Shait
100% [ 4 ]
Go to Master Calib's World/ Leave Shait Behind
0% [ 0 ]

Total Votes : 4
Who Voted: Crunchyfrog, Exmortis, Midnight, Thunderbird

I guess it's on to another chapter to go! I can do it! Wish me luck. (I really can't wait to get going on this)
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PostPosted: Fri Feb 25, 2011 10:35 pm    Post subject: Chapter 2: Outside Reply with quote

Chapter 2: Outside



Taking a few shuddering breaths, I slide my fingers across the cool metallic surface several times to calm my nerves. I can feel Shait's hand trembling in my grasp. Brushing his fingers gently, I take a few steadying gulps of air. My eyes flicker across the device. I recognize most of the buttons. In a matter of seconds, a plan forms in my mind. 'I must rescue him.' Sliding out from under Shait's hand, I stand. Taking several steps away, I begin strapping on the belt. I see Shait stand, moving towards me. “No!” I snap.

I feel a wave of guilt surge through me at the hurt look on his soft face. “Y-you are leaving me, aren’t you? You're going to leave me and chase after him...” I look away, unable to deny his words. A few swift step brings him nearly flush with my chest. “No...Please....don't leave me.” The tears laced in his voice cuts deep, and I find myself embracing him.

“You can not come. It is far to dangerous.” He presses close to me, hiding his face in the hollow of my neck. I can feel his hands slide up until they are wrapped firmly around my shoulders from the bottom.

“I will never leave you! Never! Lista, you are my life. Without you, I am nothing. Not only to this world, but for myself...” I can see his bright blue eyes sparkling with tears as ho looks out the window to the left of us. I know he's seeing far beyond what his eyes can perceive. I feel him shudder, and I know he's looking with his heart to the boy he was before I took him in.

Sliding my hand up, I begin untangling his hair with my fingers as I lose myself in thought. 'He should stay here. He has no battle training! From the way Master Calib sounded, there is great danger over there...But, if I leave him here, he's right. Without me here, he would be sold off as an abandoned page. I...I can't leave him here...' Sliding my hands down, I wrap my arms firmly around his waist. 'My comfort. My dear. My right hand.' Looking down at the mat of hair tucked against my neck, I smile for a brief second. “No. I could never leave you behind.”

His head snaps up at my whispered confession, his eyes sparkling, for a different reason this time. Pressing my lips over his, I give him a kiss, filled with everything he means to me. When I pull back, he gasps, clinging to me, his shoulder shaking with new found tears.

Keeping a firm hold on both my own tears, and Shait, I glance down at the right side of the device. Reaching over to the shelf where I keep my weapon, I slide it sheath and all between our heated bodies. I feel one of Shait's arms pull back so he can grasp the leather tightly in a shaky hand. Pressing a kiss to his forehead, I whisper, choking on the words, “Hang on tight, and never let go. I-I don't know what's going to happen. We may end up dead over there. Wh-we may never see this world again.” Tugging on his chin, I bring his head up so I can look into those deep wells of blue. “Is this alright with you?”

He lunges up, wrapping a slim arm tight around my neck, and pressing his forehead firm against my own. “To the realm of death and suffering, or to the very gates of the Land of Light. As long as I am with you, I can live with any trial, and be content to die by your side.” His whispered words bring forth a single tear. Cutting a cool trail down my flush cheek, my mind shifts to more than it's chill. Leading Shait back to my bed, I swiftly gather up our clothing. Tossing Shait's to him, we dress in a flash. Pulling him close to me again with my left arm, my Master's order rings through my mind. -I need you to take this. Guard it with your life! No matter what happens to me, we must continue to move forward. Never forget that!-

The twang of guilt at my disobeying him is swiftly overridden by the need to see him safe. 'Forgive me, Master Calib' Closing my eyes, I focus on all the times I had seen Master work the device for the Pahrah. Taking a deep breath, I whisper, “Ready?” Shait nods, burying his face into my shoulder. Running my fingers over buttons several times in the proper order, making sure I would get it right, I finally press each glowing circle in perfect rhythm with the beating of my heart.

Before I even have the chance to tense, I feel my body being pulled up. Shait's fingernails sink into my back as he clings to me. The familiar sensation of passing through the barrier makes my skin jump and tingle. Shait whimpers in my arms, so I rub his back soothingly. In mere moments, We find ourselves standing in what is unmistakeably Master Calib's room. My eyes widen at the sight of overturned tables and shattered glass everywhere. My heart begins beating rapidly, and I can panic rising in my throat, threatening to cut off my air. Shait stirring in my embrace brings me back from the verge of screaming in terror, and it is at that moment I realize something that knocks the wind right out of me.

Detaching from Shait, I clasp his hand in mine, then walk over to the Pahrah device. The glow is still fading from it's surface from it's recent activity, and I reach out in disbelief. Brushing my fingers across it, I look down into the pool. The device is waist high, the same height it is on Master Calib. In fact, everything seems just about the right size. Pressing my hand over my mouth, my innards churn with a new feeling. One of wonder, and awe. 'It has to be the belt!' Looking down at the now rather plain looking belt about my hips, I can barley make out the faint outlines of all it's many buttons. I let go of Sait's hand to caress it, feeling for the smooth circles.

I hear a cry come from Shait, and my head snaps up. My eyes, having narrowed at the threat of danger, now widen in shock at the sight before me. Rather swiftly, Shait shrinks to the size I am so used to being in my Master's world. I gawk, speechless. So many thing. So much to take in, so quickly. The sound of Shait crying out for me yanks me from the confused stupor that had taken me hostage. Automatically, I reach out for him. The second my fingers brush against his bare hand, he begins growing, and soon he's back to the size he was upon arrival. 'This is truly a wonder!' My mind shouts.

Clinging to me, Shait presses his face to my arm, his hot tears soaking through my tunic to my now chilled flesh. “Lista, please don't let me go. Being so small, it frightened me more than I could have imagined being so.” Caressing his head with my free hand, I mutter words of reassurance. Remembering my first time here, I tell him of discovering how his neighbor's pet thought I'd be a tasty meal. His grip on my arm tightens. Pulling him in for a hug, I can feel his tense body finally relaxing. Looking around at Master's room, I recall also many heated discussions I was unable to block out throughout the years.

*Flashback*

“You don't know what you're talking about! If these animals come to reali-” Master's voice cuts in, sharp as a knife.

“How dare you call them animals! They are just as sentient as you or I! Who are you to judge them? They deserve to know everything!.” Master Calib's voice causes me to shudder. 'I've never heard him so angry...' I feel him pacing back and forth, the sound of him turning every few seconds sounds harsh in my ears. “With my research, there will be no more NEED for these senseless battles! They'll be able to grow beyond them.”

I hear the other's voice, haughty and arrogant, “And what then? They come here? Destroy all we've works for over the years?” I hear the sound of hard soled shoes clip on the ground, then fade in the direction of the door. I can hear the other chuckling. “As it stands now, I'm content with being their 'Gods'. And so should you be.” The hiss of Master's door signals the other's exit.

*End Flashback*


I remember Master Calib being upset for quite some time after that altercation. It was only my second time going to my Master's world, and I was determined not to make it my last by asking questions. Now I wish I had. Whatever they had been fighting about had to be about my people, and for some reason, the other was worried about what Master Calib was up to. Perhaps, Master's research is more threatening than he thought, and that's what got him into trouble.

I caress the belt again, trying hard to remember anything that might help in rescuing my Master. I freeze. Looking down at the belt, I begin to understand. Not wanting to frighten Shait, I keep my thoughts to myself. 'If this belt is what Master Calib had been working on that caused all this mess, then there is no telling what we're in for here. Just me wearing it is going to cause problems. And with Shait shrinking to six inches tall if I'm not touching him....' I sigh, still holding Shait tight. Gritting my teeth, I look around at the mess of papers strewn about the room.

“Shait. I need you to help me.” Look up at me, he tilts his head quizzically. “We need to find where they took Master Calib. He taught me how to read his language...for the most part. Help me find any papers that look important. They may give a clue to what's going on.” I see him bite down on his bottom lip at the mere mention of Master Calib, but I know he will do anything to help me. “Keep an eye out for anything with pictures on it. I think it may help us to understand this belt Master Calib gave me.” Making sure to keep our fingers linked, we begin searching.
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 9:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Glad I had a moment to come back around to this one.

So... the size thing... I'm a little confused. Who's what size now and why?

I mean, its interesting, but you're not being overly explicit about it and its a little complex so may need some overindulgent description.

I've never been a big fan of meta-dps (where we're not trying to sort out what the character's next choice is so much as what will happen next in the story) because that just feels like the author's realm. But that comes from having a roll-playing background I guess. It's tough to say, but I suppose they should find some evidence as to where to go from here in all their searching. He may not have left any notes that say "X will capture me soon" but he might leave enough to navigate a few steps into the investigation. Follow up on names mentioned in the writings, etc...
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 10:03 am    Post subject: Sorry Reply with quote

Sorry guys, I was on 3 days no sleep when I got to writing this one. I'll go back through now and do some maintenence. Sorry for the DP the way it is, but I did it for a reason.

I'm....a person who likes being in control. When I started with the SGing, I already had pre-set ideas as to what was going to happen, and all the DPs are set so that they'll reach that end. Cept Grargoth....Anyway, with this story, I was determined NOT to look ahead, so when it came to the DP, I decided to go at it full force with leaving it in your hands.

It may seem a hassle, but please, have fun with it! I want this one more game, less story!

I'ma go attack that last chapter now......
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 10:44 am    Post subject: Yo Reply with quote

There, I hope that fixed things up a bit. And perhaps the new info will help with the DP. Well, I'm off. Had to go home early today. Suppose to be in bed. My sis is gonna kill me when she catches me up. Heheh. I hope you all enjoy!
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 09, 2011 1:59 am    Post subject: Yo! Reply with quote

I need some more ideas...I went through and did a bit of an overhaul on the chapter. Added a whole new part to it.... I hope it helped. Anyway, need mroe ideas! Please? *Big shiny eyes*
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 09, 2011 12:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just for clarification, is this a MetaDP? If so, we need some good conflict. How about a friend of Master Calib enters the room to find out what happened to his friend? When he sees Lista and Shait, he flies into a rage because he assumes they are among those who abducted Master Calib and they tore the place up looking for something.

Maybe we could have the abductors coming back using a strange device that seems to be tracking the belt. Might be nice for Lista to use all of that warrior training.

I was surprised that we grew, but that will be very helpful. It's very interesting that Shait has to keep in contact with Lista to maintain his size! That will make fighting a lot trickier....

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 09, 2011 2:32 pm    Post subject: Yes Reply with quote

Yup! This is a MetaDP. Anything your crazy minds can come up with is welcome! But please, no sudden main character deaths? It'd put a real cramp on continueing the story, ne?
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

They should definitely try to find some sort of instruction manual. They might want to check the hall and make sure there's no one out there. Also, they might want to see if there's a way that they can both stay the same size without needing to be in contact. Does it have to be touch or would a rope work as well? Or some other connection?
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2011 12:14 pm    Post subject: Well now... Reply with quote

Hmmmmm.....Good idea. I'll have to think about that one.

Hey guys, any more suggestions? Remember, this is a Meta DP. Meaning This is more of a "What" happens next rather than a "How" things happen next.
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PostPosted: Sat Mar 26, 2011 7:25 pm    Post subject: Polling Reply with quote

Fiiiiiinaly pooling! I had to mush tosh a few of the suggestions to make them make sens in a poll, but it works! Have at it!!!! Cast your votes now!
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PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2011 4:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I vote for the 'A friend of Master Calib finds them' Option.
It gives the author the chance to add some action while at the same time thickening the plot.
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PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2011 8:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Now that I am reminded of this particular DP, I can see why you were so personally involved in the met-DP discussion. That said, it may be interesting to try to run a whole SG on meta-DPs. I'm not good at coming up with suggestions for them really because I usually think so much further down the story to determine what's happening next (I rarely ever come to a point where I think to myself as an author "what now?") but I must admit the poll on this is quite interesting. Some good ideas have been thrown in.

And since I now know the thinking behind the use of meta's here, I can fully support them. Challenging yourself as an author is a noble effort.

More fascinating still is that you currently have a unanimous poll after 3 votes!
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2011 3:40 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Caught up and voted. But I think I'll have to re-read the first chapter again - it's been a while!

Good going, although I don't think my vote is going to count for much Very Happy
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PostPosted: Tue Apr 05, 2011 1:40 am    Post subject: Poll Results Reply with quote

What happens next?
Find clues pointing to a particular person as the culprit
25% [ 1 ]
A friend of Master Calib comes in and finds them and attacks, thinking them responsable for the kidnapping
75% [ 3 ]
Get surprised by the bad guys returning, led there by a tracking device tuned to the belt
0% [ 0 ]
Discover an instruction manual for the belt
0% [ 0 ]
Use the room to experiment on what the belt does, and how it works, as it relates to Shait
0% [ 0 ]

Total Votes : 4
Who Voted: Crunchyfrog, Exmortis, Lebrenth, Thunderbird


I'll get on this as soon as I've had some sleep....Yay the CON!
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PostPosted: Tue Apr 05, 2011 5:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hehe, welcome back!
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PostPosted: Mon Apr 11, 2011 7:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

We're still waiting for the next chapter here! Though we're only 2 chapters in so far, there's been a lot of progress, which is really encouraging. I'd like to see what you do next with the story.
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PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2011 4:46 am    Post subject: Chapter 3 Reply with quote

Chapter Three – Alliance




Almost an hour of searching leaves us no closer to finding out what's happened to Master Calib. Cursing I kick a pile of papers before stalking off to a corner of the room, Shait in tow. His warm fingers tighten their grip as I pull him along. 'Nothing! There is nothing here that can help us!' I feel anger and helplessness boiling hotter and hotter in my chest. Spinning around, I slam my back against the corner in frustration. Shait moves in close, sliding his arms around me. Running a hand over my shoulder blades, he begins humming an old child's song.

The sound works it's way into my body, relaxing my tense muscles. I tilt my head down, planting a kiss on the top of Shait's head. “Thank you my friend.” I whisper, “You always know how to ease my aching heart.” Shait does not reply. His arms tighten as he continues humming into my chest. Looking around, each place my eyes land on brings up another memory of my many times here in this room.


*Flashback*


Master Calib walks over to his wardrobe, the wet stain on his shirt spreading downwards. I kept apologizing over and over for knocking over his mug. I had been far too animated in my reenactment of my most recent free battle. I feel more than nervous at what I'd done. Master and I still weren't on the best of terms. I was wild and obstinate, and Master Calib was still young and lost his temper on occasion. He smiles over his shoulder at me, his child like features putting me at ease. “It's alright Lista. I was careless myself for putting it so close to the edge of the table.”

My eyes follow his every move as he slowly strips the soiled garments off. He clicks his tongue when he realizes that his pants are also wet. I can feel my cheeks heating at the sight of Master Calib standing bare before me. His skin is smooth, and white like the snow that comes rarely to the realm I live in. His hair, golden like the rising sun, brushes ever so lightly against the tops of his slim shoulders. A part of me wonders at how one so small, and obviously not used to fighting himself, could have trained me well enough to survive as long as I have.

Unmindful of my watching eyes, Master Calib shifts through several hanging garments before selecting a lush red and silver outfit. My cheeks color all the more as he turns towards me with the clothing in hand, his full glory well within view. 'What's happening? I don't even think him worthy of my respect, why am I reacting like this? He's just a boy, like me...'


*End Flashback*



That was the first time I'd realized just how much Master meant to me, even back then. 'Means to me. Not meant. He's not dead. I will find him!' My mind shouts. My own temper makes me grin. At that time, I had just discovered free battles. Having always been fighting under sponsorship, the rules and arena made it fairly exciting. It was also terrifying knowing there was no rule against killing one's opponent.

I had followed several Han I'd fought against to an open field, where many other Han were gathered. I sunk around, listening. When I overheard that Han could make extra money fighting one another, without their Master's permission, I felt I'd found a fun rebellion against my child Master. I watched several bouts, and finally someone noticed me. I was rushed into the arena, several Han eager to knock me down a peg. Their taunts and disdain kept me fighting all day, my anger piquing around dusk. I made a decent amount of money that day, but I was well aware I had gone too far.

Lifting my arm, I smile sadly at several scars I had acquired that day. To say Master Calib had been upset was an understatement. It was then I'd come to understand how important it was to control my temper. -Deep breaths. Focus within. You let the anger get into you, you'll be open to taking a blade inside you too.- Closing my eyes, I do one of the breathing exercises Master had taught me. When my frayed nerves finally settle, I open them once again and look about the demolished room. 'We need to-'

Before I can finish my thought, I hear a sound outside the door. Taking a tight grip on Shait, I turn, pressing him into the corner. I press a soft kiss to his forehead in apology before taking several steps back from him. Holding a finger to my lips to indicate I want him quiet, I watch him shrink until he's hardly noticeable among the papers and rubble littering the floor. I turn silently, reaching behind to take hold of my weapon. With a small tug it comes out of the sheath, the bottom half swinging down and snapping into place. Slightly taller than I am tall, my sherk has become an extension of myself, so when I move across the room, there is no danger of it touching anything I don't want it to.

When the door slides open, my heart skips, praying it's Master Calib. From my vantage point to the right of the door in a small alcove where Master's desk once stood, I wait for the person to walk to where I can see them. “Oh god...” The hushed voice coming from the doorway isn't Master Calib's. I tighten my grip on my weapon, ready to strike if this is an enemy. I feel myself jump slightly as the intruder rushes into the room. Before I can move to hide myself, the figure spots me. A look of pure hatred transforms the person's face into a mask of rage. “You did this didn't you!? Why can't you backwards thinking fools leave him alone?!”

With a loud bellow, the man charges. Confused by his words, my mind takes a few second to react. With barely an inch to spare, I dodge his sharp right jab. Smaller than him, I slip easily under his left arm, twisting my sherk around to slam the shaft against the attacker's back. The blow sends him stumbling forward into the wall. He turns, and I can tell by his face he's prepared to continue fighting. Lifting my foot, I press it against the corner behind me. Pushing hard, I launch myself forward. I manage to get a hold of his right hand and slam it into the wall with my left. Twisting my wrist, I bring the tip of one scythe to the man's throat. He stills, but the fury behind his eyes still burns bright. He breaths hard through clenched teeth, a fine spray of spittle hissing out with each exhale.

Bringing my own heart rate down, I go over what he'd said over and over again in my mind. 'It sound as if he thinks us the one who've kidnapped Master Calib. If this is so, then I can believe it is not him. And if this upsets him as it upsets me...' I can feel myself fighting between reason and my own feelings of anger and fear. -If you let your emotions guide you around by the nose, you'll end up with a sore nose from bumping blindly into things.- Taking a deep breath, I let reason take over. I let my tense muscles relax and move back from the man. My sherk still near enough to pose a threat to the man with very little effort, I say, “I was not the one to do this here. I understand your rage at the sight of Master Calib's room in such a state, for I feel it too.” With a visible effort, I lower my weapon. “I do not think we are enemies, sir.” My throat feels tight as I finish speaking.

The man's mask cracks, showing eyes filled with confusion and agitation. “You,” He croaks, “You're one of the Small Ones aren't you? From the land beyond the Pahrah.” My heart skips, and I nod. His hand comes up and runs though his hair. “Oh boy. This is....” I feel myself tense as his eyes drop down the my waist. The man steps forward, his silver and gray suit glistening in the light of a broken lamp nearby, his hand outstretched. 'He's reaching for the belt.' Master Calib's command crashes through my mind, causing my hand to snap up and plant one of the ends of my sherk against the man's chest to keep him at a distance. “Ow!” He yelps as the metal of the scythe jabs him harder than I intended.

“You will forgive me, but Master Calib instructed me to guard this with my life. Even if you be friend, I can not allow you to touch it.” My heart races. Standing up to one of the Great Ones, especially it it's not Master, fills me with terror. My resolve remains firm though, for it is Master's will. The look of anger that had sprung up when I had jabbed him turns to one of wonder and understanding at my words.

“I see. Well, if that's what he wanted.” The man smiles sadly at me, giving me the first good look at what he actually looks like. Older than Master by at least ten years, his build is that of a hard worker. Broad chest and shoulders give him a hearty feel. His face is square, but soft around the edges. His dark brown eyes are large and full of emotion. His hair is short, brown, and barely an inch long on top, and even shorter on the sides. His jacket is tight around the waist, unlike most of Master's coats which go all the way to the floor. “You know? You're just like I imagined you.”

The sound of the Man's voice snaps me out of my mindful examination and brings my eyes up to his. My eyes narrow. “How you imagined me? How is you know of me?” Holding his hands up defensively, the man steps sideways to a chair I had turned upright during our earlier search of the room. I feel my heart sink as I realize that it's the same chair Master Calib always sat in when I visited. Sitting down, the man explains.

“Calib has been obsessed since he was little with what he called 'The injustice shown to our fellow sentient being.' That's what he calls our relationship with your people.” I take a step back so I can lean against the nearby wall to listen. 'This may prove useful.' I think as I open my mind to whatever this man, this friend of Master Calib's, can tell me. I have to force my mind to focus as my feelings of worry try to cloud my judgment. The man shifts, leaning forward so his elbows are on his knees, his fingers laced together with his chin resting on top.

“He trained from very young in all sorts of sciences, determined to change things. When he got accepted to Quricom, the most advanced lab in the world, at the age of nine, several very important people took an interest in him. It didn't take long for most to turn away in disgust at his goals, but a few kept a close watch on him. Most were afraid he may actually succeed in his experiments, and I'm sure a few may have even been working against him.” Shaking his head, he dips down so his forehead is now resting on his clasped hands.

“From what I heard, he started an oh holy riot when he was told that in order to work here, he needed to take a fighter. I believe you guys use the word 'Han'?” He looks up at me in question. I nod, urging him to continue. “We get little bios on all the candidates before actually “meeting” them. When he read through them, I was there. He looked so mad, I thought the paper'd burst into flame. But then he was about half way through one, and I saw his face get softer. By the time he'd finished reading it, he look to almost be in tears.” Taking a deep breath, he looks deep into my eyes. “It was yours of course.”

I can feel my heart ready to burst at his words. Master Calib's eyes had found mine in an instant at the choosing ceremony, and had never left me through the whole thing. I always wondered what about me had caught his attention. Now I understand he'd been looking for me all along. I cover my eyes with a hand for several seconds, taking deep breaths before looking back at the man.

He coughs, looking away as he continues. “It was actually funny at first. He never talked to anyone before he became your sponsor. Then, one day, he busts into the bathroom, raging over some sort of fight you two had. I don't think he knew I was there, but when he spotted me, he just redoubled his ranting. It was the first time I'd seen anything but cold detachment in his eyes. Heh, they were on fire.” The man smiles wide, and my mind goes back through all those first fights we'd had. I remember those cold eyes. The man begins speaking again, bringing me out of my reverie.

“That's how we met. I've been helping him on several experiments since then, not that I can do much.” He laughs, “I'm just here for grunt work. Anyway, several times while I was helping him, he'd just start talking about you. Mostly complaining at first, but after a year or two, it all changed. He began relaying your battles. He was so exuberant about it, I thought someone was impersonating the usually stoic kid.” The man glances up at me, a soft smile playing at the corners of his mouth “You really did a number on his personality Lista.” The sound of my name on foreign lips startles me slightly, making my heart race.

The man stands, stretching. “Aahhhh, I don't really know the particulars of what he was working on. I know it's for my safety, but he did show the belt to me once. I recognized the design at once.” Looking around, his hands drop down from over his head. “He never brought anything back to his room, so there's no real reason for us to stay here longer than necessary.” He says, almost to himself it seems. My eyes glance towards the corner I'd left Shait in, my line of sight obscured by the overturned work table. My eyes snap back to the man as he speaks. “Let me help you Lista. I want to save Calib, and I know you do too.” Reaching up, tug my ear in contemplation.

'Is he telling the truth? My head tells me he is not lying, so I suppose he is. Mind over heart as Master says. But, Shait....I'll have to grab him too. Will he mind? He seems kind, but...' Shifting from my left foot to my right, I close my eyes. 'I can't wander this world alone. He's offering to help me, not asking for my help. He is a follower. That will make things easier.' My eyes open, and I see the man staring at the corner where I'd left Shait. My heart skips a beat and I push softly off the wall. Walking past the taunt man, I move towards where the walls meet. I stoop down and Shait comes running out from behind a stack of papers. Taking a deep breath, I take his hand.

The startled yelp from behind me signals exactly when the man realizes something strange is happening. Soon, Shait stands beside me, his face mostly hidden behind red locks and against my arm. I can feel my heart pounding, waiting for some sort of response from the man. To my utter surprise, he laughs. Just a quick bark of one, but it's definitely a laugh. “Well, doesn't that beat all. This must be your right hand man, Shait. Calib told me how you'd always stare daggers at some unknown something or excuse yourself when he showed up to talk to Lista when you were there.” I glance down at Shait and he hides his face fully against my arm. I can see his ears changing colors to match his hair.

Looking back up, I reply, “Yes, this is Shait. If we are to truly work together to rescue Master Calib, you must know that Shait will also be coming with. I will not leave him.” The man nods, still smiling

“Of course. Wouldn't dream of separating you. You're very special to Calib, and he says your smart. I trust you'll know what's best.” I feel Shait's nails dig into my arms when the man says I'm special to Master. Petting his hair, I watch the man walk over to the wardrobe, one of the only bits of furniture still standing. Pawing through the clothes still hanging up, he pulls out two of the red and silver ones. The red shirt and many pocketed pants hang inside the long silver overcoat, which shimmers in the dim light of the room. “Put these on. They should get us past security and out of the building. These are Scientist standard, so you shouldn't stand out too much. That weapon should be hidden well enough under the coat if you hang it low an tight.”

I feel a twinge at the thought of wearing Master Calib's clothes, but I know it's necessary. 'No problem for me but...' I look down at my left arm to find bright blue orbs staring back at me, an obstinate glint in them. After several minutes of staring hard into Shait's eyes, he finally look away with a “Fine...” I press a kiss to his forehead and lead him over to where the man stands patiently holding the clothing. Taking both sets, I lay them across the edge of the overturned table. Shait and I both begin undressing, and I see the man whip around, his ears pink.

“Uh, hem, well...Oh, yeah. My name's Garret by the way Garret Magretsky.” I hear him sigh loudly. “To tell the truth, I was worried something like this might happen. I've heard rumors that higher ups have been in a tizzy about something, and nothing not involving Calib has gotten so much as a cough out of those bastards in over a decade. That's why I came here today.” Doing my best to stay in contact with Shait, dressing takes a bit longer than normal. “I'm actually really glad you're here. I'm not a thinking man, and I admit it with no shame. If you're even half as smart as Calib says you are, you're the only guy on this planet capable of going against the top guys here.”

Looking over my shoulder at the back of Garret's head, I feel confusion nag at the back of my mind. 'Huh?' “Um, please forgive me asking, but why am I the only one? I know there must be more powerful and knowledgeable people in this world. I find your words hard to believe.” His shoulders slump as he lets out a humorless laugh.

“Well, my new friend, you and your page there are the only two people on this whole planet that they can't track. You don't have the ID chip every one of us receives at birth. In truth, only the government is suppose to be able to track them, but I heard the President here has a system for just that purpose. I believe it.” I log away the knowledge about being tracked as I help Shait finish dressing. Just to check, I let go of him momentarily, just long enough to see that the clothing begin shrinking with him.

Grabbing his hand again, I turn to Garret and tell him we've finished. I can feel my skin tingling beneath the light material. I can't tell if it's from the touch of the strange fabric, or from the fact that I'm wearing Master Calib's clothing. Garret gives us a once over and nods. “Good, good. Let me see the back?” I turn and after a few seconds he says, “And good! It's only noticeable if you know what to look for! This is great!” Clapping his hand together, he motions us towards the door. “If we can pull this off, it's just a quick shuttle ride to my house. We can talk more there, maybe come up with something, some plan, to rescue Calib.” A loud growl from Garrets midsection brings the first smile all day to my lips. Laughing away the embarrassment, he adds, “And get a bite to eat I suppose...”

The walls of the hallway are the same color as the walls in Master's room, and seem to be made of the same metal. Several minutes pass in contemplative silence. When someone comes into the hall several meters ahead, I feel Shait stiffen. The woman, dressed much like us, passes without a glance. Several other people pass, a few raising a hand as they walk by, which I return in kind to avoid suspicion. The glowing panels along the walls provide an almost eerie atmosphere. There are no windows, and all the halls look the same. Suddenly, Garret comes to a stop. My own feet cease movement and my eyes lock on the people who had just entered the hall.

Tall, overbuilt, and wearing bright pink one piece outfits, I can feel my heckles rise. They walk up, and they seem to be staring at Garret. When I look hard at their eyes, I feel my stomach drop as I realize that there's something wrong with their eyes. The area inside their sockets look to be filled with stark white buttons with no holes. I can feel Shait digging his fingers in deeper and deeper the closer they get. My own heart is in my throat.

“Hello officers. May I help you?” Garret says in a forced nonchalant voice. The two hulking figures stop less than two feet away.

“Garret Magretsky.” The one on the right says, “You are to be taken in for questioning by the head office. Please come quietly.” Garret's face falls at the icy words. I swear my blood freezes in my veins at just the sound of his voice. Suddenly the one on the left leans over and whispers something into the others' ear. Both sets of “eyes" are now watching me.

“Um, well,” Garret chimes in, “Uh, can I at least walk these guys out? I promised them a drink after work, but if y-” The one on the left cuts off Garret's stream of excuses.

“Where is your ID chip. It is against the law to remove your chip.” The frost in my veins grows even colder, and Shait starts shaking hard against my side. My mind goes blank.

+++++++++++


Ok guys, yet again, another Meta! Will they be captured? Go willingly? Kill the officers? Get sent to a lab for experiments? Will superman crash through the wall and save the day? Have at it my dear readers. Sorry for the wait! *Bows*

In honor of the long wait, this is an exspecialy long chapter...for me at least. Almost 4k words, yay! Enjoy!
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Last edited by PopeAlessandrosXVIII on Tue Jun 28, 2011 12:18 pm; edited 2 times in total
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PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2011 8:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I enjoyed this chapter, Pope! So we have sci-fi meets fantasy here eh? Nice.

Ok then, I say they dispatch the po po but not without a tough fight where the robotic police pull some techno tricks these 'knights' are not at all prepared for, making for an eye opening experience indeed.
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CHAPTER 25: Near-Light Speed (NEW CHAPTER! (12/4/2011))
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PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2011 8:09 am    Post subject: knight 3 response Reply with quote

Ok, first here's the typos I found:
Quote:
What can't you backwards thinking fools leave him alone

Calib has be obsessed since he was little with what he called

From what I heard, he started an oh holy riot when he was told that in order to work here, he needed to take a fighter.

I can feel my heart ready to burst at his words. Master Calib's eyes had found mine in an instant at the choosing ceremony, and had never left me thought he whole thing. I always wondered what about me had caught his attention. Now I understand he'd been looking for me all along. Cover my eyes with a hand for several seconds, taking deep breaths before looking back at the man.

That will make thing easier

and nothing not involving Calib has gotten so much as a cough out of those bastards in over a decade. That's why I cam here today.”

His shoulders lump as he lets out a humorless laugh.

but I head the President here has a system for just that purpose.

I fell Shait stiffen

Several other people pass, a few raising a hand as the walk by

The two hulking figure stop less than two feet away

Both sets of “eyes are now watching me.


It's a big chapter, so it's easy to make a lot of mistakes... I just thought you would like to know about them.

Bright pink white eyed muscular officers? Yikes! But since this is another MetaDP, I think we should go kind of crazy with this one.

How about the officers take them away in an aircraft of some kind, but before they arrive at their destination, Lista takes over?

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